Reddit mentions: The best family life books for children

This sounds like a good question for her therapist, but I'll weigh in with some ideas I posted in another thread recently:

> If she's experiencing separation anxiety (i.e. repeatedly coming out of her room), talk about what might help her feel more comfortable staying in her bed. You could think about getting a special nightlight that she helps pick out, a dreamcatcher, glow-in-the-dark stars for her ceiling, etc. You might invent a special "secret handshake" for bedtime, a "magic spell" of your protection around her bed, give her favorite stuffed animal "magic powers", etc - get creative! :) Teach her how to take deep belly breaths or tighten muscle groups one at a time (toes, then legs, then stomach, etc up to her face) to help her relax. This site has some great ideas for kids relaxation exercises, and there are several books such as Starbright and Imaginations which have relaxation stories you can read aloud (and this book features familiar fairytales retold as relaxation stories). There are also recordings of such stories you can download for her to listen to as she falls asleep, like Still Quiet Place, Indigo Dreams, and Bedtime Meditations for Kids. Listening to calming music can be good too.
>
>The nice thing about introducing self-soothing tools like these is that instead of "lay quietly in your bed" you can tell her to "lay quietly and listen to the music" or "lay quietly and watch the glow-in-the-dark stars on your ceiling" -- something positive for her to focus on instead of worries. You can also talk about what fun things she'd like to do in her dreams, and help her imagine those happy thoughts; even agree to "meet up" and play together in your dreams so she won't feel like she's going to be alone all night. Again, this gives her something to focus on instead of thinking about trying to fall asleep.
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>I should also add that if she's gotten used to having a parent with her to fall asleep, you may have to wean her from that support gradually. Maybe sit by her bed reading until she falls asleep; the next night, move your chair a bit further away. You can give her brief verbal reassurance that you're there, but remind her that it's time to lay quietly and listen to her music/watch her stars/think about playing in a treehouse in her dreams/whatever. Over time, you can move your chair further and further away until you're in the hallway, and then if necessary, offer to come check on her periodically until she falls asleep. Transitional objects can be helpful during this process as well; you might also check out a book like The Kissing Hand or The Invisible String for more ideas to help her feel your presence even when you're not physically in her room.

All of this applies equally to going back to sleep in the middle of the night (just takes more patience, I know!). Definitely better to take a gradual approach than letting her cry it out though, especially given her past. You might also try to figure out if there's anything she is anxious about specifically; depending on her history, she may be afraid of actual harm coming to her at night. If so, find ways to reassure her that she's safe (have her help lock the doors, if you have a pet tell her they will be guarding her, etc) and know that over time, as she feels more secure in your home, those fears will lessen. The more coping tools you can give her in the meantime, the better.

I'm not a regular contributor, but I felt like making a top-10 list of my favorite books so far. (My son will be turning 3 soon.)

The rules mention links to facebook or blogs; I'm hoping non-referral links to Amazon are okay. I'll link board books where possible, because pages get ripped and torn until at least two-and-a-half years of age.

• Little Blue Truck: Most parents probably already know this one. Great book for when children are starting to speak - you can point to each of the animals and ask what it "says."
  
• Jamberry: Beautiful illustrations, and it can be read as a song. I'm pretty sure two verses were switched - I think it should be "Three berry four berry, my berry your berry, hayberry strawberry, finger and pawberry." Bugs me a little bit.
  
• Chugga Chugga Choo Choo: Another singable book with rhymes and good illustrations, and a good means of prompting child participation - they can fill in the "whoo whooo!" part.
  
• Planting a Rainbow: Great eye-grabbing book for learning colors. Can also be read with a rhythm, though it isn't as singable as the others.
  
• Little Owl's Night: Great book for pre-empting any fears of the dark. "Owls wake up at night time, and sleep when the sun is up." Surely if this little owl is chilling at night with his fox and turtle buddies, that means nighttime is nothing to be afraid of.
  
• The Little Dump Truck: Has a good rhythm and good illustrations. Helps give your kid, who loves dump trucks but doesn't know why, an idea of what dump trucks actually do.
  
• Twenty Big Trucks in the Middle of the Street: Fantastic counting book, and has a good rhythm as well. Highly recommend for getting your kid to count past ten.
  
• Potty: A godsend for potty training. Start reading it a couple months before you introduce the potty, and read it often. We potty-trained our son at about 34 months with a combination of this book and Season 2, Episode 1 of Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood. He used a little plastic thing for about two weeks before we moved him up to the integrated seat, which is great because it can just be wiped down after use.
  
• Julia's House for Lost Creatures: Beautifully illustrated, and a great introduction to cleaning up after yourself. "What do good boys do if they make a little mess?" "Um, clean up!" The text doesn't flow well in some parts - I get the impression that this was intended for comic-book reading children - but it isn't overly wordy and has more than enough art to compensate.
  
• Why is the Grass Green? First Questions and Answers about Nature: If anyone knows about a more recent version of this, I'd be very interested. We found this one in a library's outdoor "take one, leave one" box. Some of it is still too advanced for our little one to wrap his head around, but the way this book distills concepts into concise explanations with simple wording is amazing. Highly recommended for any child that asks a lot of "why" questions.

• Press Here
  This book is SO much fun. It’s an interactive one so more fun when they get a little older.
  
  
• Room on the Broom
  A fun story about sharing and the importance of friendship when you need help.
  
  
• Pig the Pug
  This one is a hilarious story about a mean dog falling out a window lol. It was recommended to me by a little girl at Barnes and Noble. She picked it up and said “Wanna read about the worst dog ever?” She wasn’t wrong haha.
  
  
• Goodnight, Goodnight Construction Site
  Just a nice little rhyming bedtime story about construction equipment.
  
  
• Baby Beluga
  Yes, like the Raffi song! Singing books are sooo great to help get your little one interested in talking. This was one of my favorite songs as a kid but I only recently found out about the book. My son loves singing this with me.
  
  
• I Love You Stinkyface
  About loving your kid no matter who they are. Although I feel like it’s slightly geared toward moms of boys, it’s great for any kid or parent (they don’t actually use pronouns for the kid in the book FYI).
  
  
• Someday
  About the dreams and wishes for your baby as they grow up. Definitely on the sappy side, geared a little more toward moms of girls but I read it to my son often (and cry while I do it).
  
  
• Little Blue Truck
  Cute rhyming story about the importance of friendship and being nice to those you meet.
  
  
• Go Away Big Green Monster
  This one is a little older but idk if everyone has heard of it. It’s essentially an interactive book that teaches your kid that they have control of monsters. Each page pieces together a picture of a monster (it’s not a scary one), until you tell the monster to go away, and then each page takes a piece of the monster away.
  
  
• Anything written by Mo Willems!!
  The Pigeon books, Elephant and Piggie books, and Knuffle Bunny are all great. Funny for adults and engaging for kids.
  
  (Will edit and add more later as I think of them)

I know some of these have already been mentioned, so just consider this a second vote for those titles. Also, my list skews heavily towards sci-fi/fantasy, because that is what I tend to read the most of.

By women, featuring female protagonists:

The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood

Kindred by Octavia E. Butler

The Female Man by Joanna Russ

Kushiel's Dart by Jacqueline Carey

Lavinia by Ursula K. Le Guin

The Circus in Winter by Cathy Day (It's not entirely fair to characterize this as a book about women; it's really a set of interconnected stories featuring both male and female characters. On the other hand, many of the most memorable characters, IMO, are women, so I'm filing it in this category anyway. So there!)

The Protector of the Small Quartet by Tamora Pierce, beginning with First Test (Really, anything by Tamora Pierce would fit the bill here. They're young adult novels, so they're quick reads, but they're enjoyable and have wonderful, strong, realistic female protagonists.)

These Old Shades by Georgette Heyer (Heyer wrote really fun, enjoyable romances, typically set in the Regency period, though These Old Shades is actually Georgian. This one is probably my favorite, but they're really all quite wonderful. Not super heavy stuff, but don't write her off just because of the subject matter. She was a talented, witty writer, and her female protagonists are almost never the wilting "damsel in distress" type - they're great characters who, while still holding true to their own time and place, are bright and likeable and hold their own against the men in their lives.)

A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle (Another young adult book. And, again, I think it's worth noting that L'Engle's books almost always feature strong and interesting female characters. This one is probably her most famous, and begins a series featuring members of the same family, so it's a good jumping off point.)

Persepolis by Marjane Satrapi


By men, featuring female protagonists:

The Last Unicorn by Peter S. Beagle (This is another one that is perhaps not a perfect fit for this category; the titular unicorn is female, but the book is as much about Schmendrick the magician as it is about her. However, there's also Molly Grue, so on the strength of those two women, I'm classifying this book as having female protagonists.)

The Book Thief by Markus Zusak

Coraline by Neil Gaiman (It's a children's book, but there's plenty to enjoy about it as an adult, too.)

By women, featuring male protagonists

Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell by Susanna Clarke

The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin

The Replacements IS weird, but it could be something you might be interested in the future.

Unwind will make you think, that's for sure...maybe once you've hit a couple fun books, that's something you could think about reading! :)

You also might like The Mysterious Benedict Society; here's the synopsis from Amazon:
"Are you a gifted child looking for special opportunities?"

When this peculiar ad appears in the newspaper, dozens of children enroll to take a series of mysterious, mind-bending tests. (And you, dear reader, can test your wits right alongside them.) But in the end just four very special children will succeed. Their challenge: to go on a secret mission that only the most intelligent and resourceful children could complete. To accomplish it they will have to go undercover at the Learning Institute for the Very Enlightened, where the only rule is that there are no rules.

As our heroes face physical and mental trials beyond their wildest imaginations, they have no choice but to turn to each other for support. But with their newfound friendship at stake, will they be able to pass the most important test of all?

Welcome to the Mysterious Benedict Society.
___
Enjoy! Let me know if you need recs in the future - feel free to PM me!

Don't know if you meant a pun with a stork and flying, but it was funny nonetheless.

I want to make sure I'm the one to talk to my child about this. And nowadays, it can come from elsewhere pretty early.

After five, we've talked about it a few more times, "Mom, does it feel good when Dad puts his penis in you?" "Yes, otherwise people wouldn't have sex and humanity would have died out a long time ago," (though I can't figure out how cats haven't died out yet, that sounds painful!). She knows what sexy is, and why it's not appropriate for her. She know the appropriate use of breasts (she nursed until 38 months, her 26 month old younger sister is still nursing). She was there when her younger sister was born. She knew we were trying for a baby, read the pregnancy test with me to confirm it was positive, and was there for most of our prenatal appointments. So we had a lot of opportunity for little discussions, rather than THE TALK once. It built on previous info, and while it's a little uncomfortable to discuss, once I put it in terms of humanity, rather than "What Dad and I do is..." it's just biology. Same as digestion or pumping blood.

We also have this book. http://www.amazon.com/Its-So-Amazing-Families-Library/dp/0763613215/ref=sr_1_8?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1322263978&sr=1-8 It goes into appropriate detail. What happens with men, with women, in the uterus. It's neither crude or porn, nor condescending ("a man gives a woman a special kiss and then a baby is born nine months later"). It's the best book I've seen on the subject. While I was pregnant my older daughter would read it, and come to me with questions.

She's also got a book on what will happen to her body over the next several years, what changes she can expect physically and mentally. Since it's her body gearing up to become a childbearing woman, now's a great time to make sure she knows it's not kissing, not a hug, and certainly not the stork. We've talked about condom use and safe sex, and that babies are not the only unwanted outcome of unprotected sex. That if you have sex with someone, you're having sex with their partners in some way.

So just build on it a little at a time, but be honest.

Self Improvement:

1. Tell me about it. In my 20's, I ate everything under the sun and could barely maintain. Around 35, that shit ended. I did keto to lose it, but now eat a low-carb diet to keep it off. How are your cooking skills? What eating habits do you think are hindering your goals? Mine was beer and late-night carb snacking.
   
   
2. What stopped? I'm guessing a combination of stress, depression and too much fucking life! Something else, maybe?
   
   
3. Ooooh! What did you create before? Sounds interesting!
   
   
   Stuff for your daughter:
   
   
4. A walk before or after dinner. Every day. Teach her to observe. The birds and bugs. The spray paint markings on the street. See a plane in the sky? Ask her where she thinks it is going. Ask her why she thinks the leaves on the tree are changing color and falling off. It is a great chance to bond with her and help her learn (and for you to learn from here). It also helps with your first self-improvement item. During our walks, we end up playing tag, sumo wrestling (she wins a lot), a stripped-down fartlek (you might call them Indian runs), or her invention--running while holding hands. She loves these games and it gets my ass out of a chair. Again, the bonding time is unmatched.
   
   
5. Temper your expectations here. I say do it with gusto, but know that you will need tough skin if the PTA is mostly moms. They will see you as an intruder (as they do with most men in early education). I'm not one bit saying not to do it. Just know that you'll have to be extra tough and persistent. I would suggest also joining a dad's group. It's a good way for you to meet other motivated dads and learn additional dadcraft skills. PM me if you're having a hard time finding one in your area.
   
   
6. 4-5 books a night. This is the best damn thing you can do for your daughter. Your local library is awesome. Don't forget that they can order other books from other neighboring libraries. We have dealth with death (The Fall of Freddie the Leaf, When Dinosaurs Die), potty training (Potty), divorce (Two Homes), science (Baby Loves Thermodynamics or Scientist Scientist), anatomy (Contemplating Your Belly Button), personal conduct (any of the Toddler Tools books from Free Spirit Publishing). I also throw one Dad book in each night like Kisses for Daddy, Grizzly Dad, Daddy Cuddles, Because I'm Your Dad and others. The DC Superheroes Character Education series is pretty nice. It also helps your bond with your daughter along with improving her reading skills.

It's not specifically to do with overcoming trauma, but I'd highly recommend Savvy by Ingrid Law. It's a wonderful tween coming of age story about a girl who is born into a family that all develop a random superpower that appears at age 13.

I also really enjoyed The Mysterious Benedict Society by Trenton Lee Stewart. It's about a group of talented kids (some of whom are orphans) who band together to form kind of a super team. They all have different skills and family backgrounds, and it's got great dialogue, characters, and humour.

It sounds like she's going to have a wonderful new family anyway. Best of luck to you all.

I never found a good guide book, but there are good picture books...
My son was 2/3 when I split from his dad, he still likes to read Two Homes
One thing to keep in mind down the road is to be clear that the split is permanent (if it is). May sound heartless, but giving kids room to imagine a reconciliation is much crueler.
Be matter of fact and happy about your choice, and he will adapt. Kids need their parents to be strong and comfortable, as long as you reassure him you both love him forever and that you are both happy he will be ok. Any specific questions I'd be happy to answer, but it's a pretty broad topic!

My daughter is 1.5, she doesnt talk, but she LOVES to read! I would love for her to have a special Christmas book that we can read on Christmas eve, like this bear book! My son is 6 months and we are starting sign with him and this book would be great for him! I think books are a great gifts, nice choice and thank you for the kind offer :)

Some help:

Maybe Yes, Maybe No (LINK)

by Dan Barker

In today's media-flooded world, there is no way to control all of the information, claims, and enticements that reach young people. The best thing to do is arm them with the sword of critical thinking.

Maybe Yes, Maybe No is a charming introduction to self-confidence and self-reliance. The book's ten-year-old heroine, Andrea, is always asking questions because she knows "you should prove the truth of a strange story before you believe it."

"Check it out. Repeat the experiment. Try to prove it wrong. It has to make sense." writes Barker, as he assures young readers that they are fully capable of figuring out what to believe, and of knowing when there just isn't enough information to decide. "You can do it your own way. If you are a good skeptic you will know how to think for yourself."

Another book is "Me & Dog" by Gene Weingarten.

And Born With a Bang: The Universe Tells Our Cosmic Story : Books 1, 2, 3

Here Comes Science CD + DVD

The Magic of Reality by Richard Dawkins

Bang! How We Came to Be by Michael Rubino.

Grandmother Fish: A Child's First Book of Evolution
Grandmother Fish, free in PDF form online

Also:

Greek Myths – by Marcia Williams

Ancient Egypt: Tales of Gods and Pharaohs – by Marcia Williams

God and His Creations – by Marcia Williams

"I Wonder" by Annaka Harris

"From Stardust to You: An Illustrated Guide to The Big Bang" by Luciano Reni

"Meet Bacteria!" by Rebecca Bielawski

See also Highlights for Children - this has materials for younger children.

Atheism books for children by Courtney Lynn

"It Is Ok To Be A Godless Me", "I'm An Atheist and That's Ok", "I'm a Freethinker", "Please Don't Bully Me" and "I'm a Little Thinker" etc.

Courtney Lynn has a couple more for grown ups as well.

Grandmother Fish, free in PDF form online

A child's first book of evolution.

15 Holiday Gift Ideas for Secular Families

Bedtime Bible Stories by Joey Lee Kirkman - for mature teens only

Coming up: TINY THINKERS is a series of books introducing popular scientists to children, by telling their stories as if the scientists themselves were kids!

I have a 9-year-old daughter, too. For Roald Dahl, don't miss Danny the Champion of the World, and The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar and Six More (the latter is for older kids, so I'm not sure about the six more, but Henry Sugar is indeed wonderful).

Redwall is a bit on the graphic side. Best skim one first. A substitute for the time being is the Warriors series. My wife and daughter read them independently in unison (my wife reading after her bedtime) and discussed them.

Harry Potter is conspicuously missing from your list. Intentional? I hope you haven't pegged this one as having cruelty as its main theme. It's jam-packed with great themes of friendship, loyalty (within reason), trust, love of parents and family, standing up for what's right, and a whole bunch more. It's one of those book series you want a notebook for, to jot down quotes because there are so many gems.

Dear America is a fictional diary series of girls living in various periods in history.

The Mary Poppins series shouldn't be overlooked. It's quite different from the movie.

I'm putting my money on The Enchanted Forest Chronicles series, first book: Dealing with Dragons. The head-strong princess has no interest in the idiot prince she's supposed to marry, is quite comfortable once she's in the company of a dragon, and no thank you, she has no need for being rescued.

Also, The Mysterious Benedict Society series. It all starts with a newspaper ad seeking "gifted children looking for special opportunities."

You are not crazy, selfish, or mean. I'd be hella stressed right now, too. I agree with a ton of the advice here, particularly about who they're really angry at. It doesn't make it easier on you, but I agree that it's probably more about their son. I also like the list of boundaries someone else suggested.

I know you're dealing with a lot right now, but if you have a moment, could you explain this a bit more:

>thinking that my children need a dad or that a sperm donor is a dad is homophobic.

Is this just a matter of semantics here? ("Dad"= involved and present male figure involved in day to day care of children) My 4yo has been asking a ton about where babies come from and how babies are made. Among others, I like this book, What Makes a Baby? because it talks about how some people have different parts in their bodies necessary to make a baby and some don't, and it models all sorts of families in the illustrations. But egg and sperm are still part of the explanation. I want to give him fact-based information, and it never occurred to me that it might be homophobic to explain that babies are made from an egg cell (from a woman) and a sperm cell (from a man) and they grow into a baby in a uterus (in a woman). And some babies have families with two parents, some with one, some with grandparents, some with two moms, some with two dads, etc. So I guess my question is, is there a particular phrasing for this that is better or worse? Because the fact is your babies have a biological father and mother because they were made from sperm and egg(s), even if their family has two moms. And if my 4yo was asking about it, I'd probably say something like, "Cousin gave his sperm and mom gave her egg and OP gave her uterus to grow the babies. And OP and mom are their two mommies." Is there a better way to phrase that? Thanks!

And good luck with he crazy...it's really big of you to make the effort. With any luck, you all can come to a place of peace with this before your girls are old enough to be aware of the drama.

Books, books, books! My babies love(d) Look, Look! (three year old loves "reading" it to his brother), Black & White, Art Cards, the Babyfaces series (esp Hugs and Kisses and Smile!. The World Snacks series is also great; they're bright, (mostly) well-written, and not irritating. Plus, My toddler still loves them, and we started reading them to him when he was three months. I like Yum Yum Dim Sum and Let's Nosh! best. Indestructables are great for babies who eat books. And the Leslie Patricelli books have been a huge hit around here since toddlerdude was a wee baby.

Don't forget non-board books good for reading, such as a Mother Goose (there are also "chunky" ones that are kid-safe), Beatrix Potter, The Wind in the Willows, or even Shel Silverstein.

Toys for this age that I like are sensory balls, music makers, rattles (we had to buy two of those because wee babydude likes it so much), stackers, links, these bead things (a large, four-sided activity cube is gold for this age through toddler hood--like this), stacking cups, and baby's first blocks. We have veriations on all of these (or the exact one listed), and they are popular with both our three year old and the eight month old.

So, I too have had this debate many times, and I am heartened every time someone steps up in support of character based writing like Hanzi. My honest attitude toward this is "I want to believe". I want to believe that there is equal merit to Hanzi as letter-based phonetic writing like romanized, cyrillic, etc. But all the evidence seems to point to the contrary.

Some rebuttals to your points:

>I imagine there's also been an increase in the number of English speakers who have problems remembering the spelling for words where the pronunciation is not as obvious when read.

Let's assume this is the case. I mean, there's some evidence that it isn't the case but let's assume it is. There's a categorical difference between forgetting the "I before E, except after C" rule, or forgetting whether you need an 'e', an 'i', or an 'a' in words like "definitely", "separate", and "necessary" and fundamentally forgetting that a letter existed or how to handwrite a letter.

In this clip, there's a gentleman who "struggles with the character for 'thumb'." The above words are 3 and 4 syllables long but 拇指 (Mǔzhǐ) is only 2 syllables and he got half the word wrong. This is a far cry from simply mixing up the order of two letters like writing "beleive" instead of "believe". In other words, here's an article from just 2017 saying "Character amnesia has become more and more common...". Show me the article that says there's currently an epidemic of otherwise literate adults forgetting how to write basic words in English.

>The writing system survived for thousands of years because it was effective.

I mean, there's "effective" and there's "optimal", right? The Mayan civilization lasted for about 3000 years and had a glyph based writing system. Would you seriously advocate that this is an optimal system of writing? Probably not, right? So I think this argument is true but a little misleading, depending on what exactly you mean by "effective". Then again, "effective" is defined as "producing a decided, decisive, or desired effect". Was the "desired effect" of the language for its users to begin forgetting its own writing system?

>(ie, the use of physician, medic, and doctor for medical personnel), it gets a lot harder for the reader to guess what's being referred to.

I'm not sure what you mean here. Yeah, those are three different words with three different definitions and they might be industry-specific. But it's not about it being "harder" for a reader to understand the difference. When a reader comes across a word, they either know what the definition is or not. If it's a real word then then the burden is on the reader to go to a dictionary and look up what the word is. It's also the writers job to try to make their vernacular and syntax as clear as possible.

>Furthermore, they take up little room on the page

Ehhhhh, again, technically true, but so what? It's not even that big of a difference. Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone in English is 309 pages while in Chinese it's 242. This is not that much value-added.

Arguing that Hanzi has some benefits over romanization is like arguing that chopsticks has merit over the fork (another mistake in efficiency I think the East made). You're essentially saying "Sure, forks are ok, but look! you can't twirl a fork around like this can you?" It just strikes me as a pride thing.

Again! I'm a big fan of the language. I think there are some interesting logical ambiguities that exist in English that don't in Mandarin. For example, there's this joke in English — Question: "What did the logician say when his wife handed him their newborn and asked if it's a boy or a girl", Answer: "Yes" — Well, in Mandarin, since you specify Yes/No questions with the 'ma' particle, you avoid the ambiguity.

Congrats on your daughter! I have a nine year old myself and she loves fantasy and books in general.

I started her young with picture books of which there are fabulous ones with strong female characters.

Rosie Revere, Engineer - not fantasy per se, but the females are empowering. There's a whole series of books about girls in STEM roles from the same authors.

Interstellar Cinderella - Cinderella is a rocket engineer who fixes the prince's ship. She also declines his invitation to marry because she only just met him.

The Princess and the Pony tired of getting sweaters for her birthday, she asks for a real WARRIOR horse and instead gets a chubby little pony. She enters the annual brawl anyways. Endearing, funny, and pokes fun at gender stereotyping.

And for when she's a bit older and can sit still to listen for longer stretches, The Secret World of Og is a great read.

>The series follows the five Berton children, Penny, Pamela, Peter, Patsy, and baby Paul (better-known as “The Pollywog”) as they discover and explore a vast,mysterious world of caverns and rivers hidden beneath a trapdoor in the floor of their clubhouse.

The female characters are strong, unique, and self-sufficient. Not to mention it's a clever and well-written story!

Anyways, I have more I could suggest but you're already under a pile of excellent suggestions. Congrats again!

it's like you described my LO at that age! He loved just being plopped down on a towel on our carpet and would look around the room, coo, flail, etc. We got this book: https://www.amazon.com/Black-White-Tana-Hoban/dp/0061172111 and would prop it up around him (it stands on it's own as an accordian fold). He LOVVVEED looking at it. That might help with better focus/attention (again at that age, they get distracted by anything!) We got the skip hoptreetop nature playmat as well, though it was overwhelming to him at first. We put a plain blanket down over the 'playmat' part (to cut down on the patterns/colors, and only hung 2 toys overhead. That worked really well! He'd look and swat at things, but didn't actually grab anything until weeks later.

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For feeding, I did lots of songs or talking to LO to keep him focused on ME, which helped him not get distracted. Using a boring chair/corner/white walls helps too. dimming lights for nighttime works great too.

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for what its worth, my LO can recite the alphabet and numbers to 10 (gets a little messy on the way to 20-lol) at 15 months old. It's CRAZY how verbal he is. He's nosy about EVERYTHING, points at everything, repeats all the names we say of things, etc. He CAN however, focus very intently/well on something for 15-20 minutes at a time (and a youtube kids-songs video for about an hour at a time). Just keep an eye on LO's attention span, especially if you put super interesting things in front of him. If he really is antsy/can't focus on an activity (the book, for example) for more than 2 solid minutes, etc -- then bring it up with the ped.

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EDIT to add: do you use an app like glow baby to track feeds/naps? that was really helpful to us to spot LO's natural "patterns" and reinforce them to help get onto a consistent schedule.

Buy this set of books. Read them yourself. Then read them with your daughter, as much as you're ready for. Leave them out where she can look through them herself.

http://www.amazon.ca/Its-Not-Stork-Families-Friends/dp/0763633313/ref=pd_bxgy_b_img_c

http://www.amazon.ca/Its-So-Amazing-Babies-Families/dp/0763613215/ref=pd_bxgy_b_img_b/177-6181848-2944312

http://www.amazon.ca/Its-Perfectly-Normal-Changing-Growing/dp/0763644846

By the way, it's not the "bad kids" at school who know about this stuff. In fact, it was very likely to be my own kids, who were as far from "bad" as you can possibly imagine. They simply had the benefit of having two parents who were involved in teaching a variety of different sex ed courses, and who were never uncomfortable discussing it with them.

I still remember my kids running into the house one summer afternoon, yelling, "Mom, mom, (our neighbours' 7 and 9 year old girls) don't know what a condom is!"

I said, "So, what did you tell them?"

Very primly, my nine year old girl said, "I told them condoms are a barrier method of contraception."

And my seven year old son jumped in and said excitedly, "And I told them condoms are like balloons, but never ever write on them with permanent markers, because they'll POP!"

It's hilarious what kids take away at different ages!

Give your daughter the gift of accurate information about her body, about sex, and about relationships. Not only will you be doing her a favour by empowering her with facts, but you'll also be helping every other kid she might choose share this information with.

My daughter's now in Grade 11 and has had to correct more than one of her friends on some basic facts. Yes, you CAN get pregnant if you do it standing up. The first time is not a "freebie". The Pill won't protect you from STIs. Using a tampon doesn't mean you're not a virgin any more, and no, it won't migrate into your uterus and get lost up there. Always go out with friends, stick with them, and never leave a drink unattended. Exposing yourself on chat roulette is a Very Bad Idea.

As for what other kids (who are also not "bad kids") might tell your daughter... I once had a very entertaining afternoon listening through my window to one 9 year old boy who was very seriously explaining to another 9 year old boy that all babies are the same when they start growing in their mummy's bellies, but then boys get "outies" and girls get "innies" and that's why boys and girls fit together when they have sex. There's always some interesting stories going around the school yards! Better to give your kids the real story, yourself.

>where is the definitive version

What does that even mean for an anthology of works written over hundreds of years by at least dozens of authors and editors?

>A lot rides on whether you believe genesis to be true.

Something can be non-factual and still contain truth. No, I'm not a Young Earth Creationist, That doesn't make the book useless to me.

>For example there will never be mistranslated, inaccurate copy of a harry potter book.

Great example. I own this book: Harry Potter y la piedra filosofal and this book: Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. You don't even have to leave the front cover before you begin to run into translation problems. Does Philosopher mean the same thing to you as Sorcerer?

>Actually although all 3 gods are the "same" god, the teachings of each religion cannot coexist. To be more precise, if you get to heaven and the muslim god is there then jews and christians wont be getting in.

If they are truly the same, and I'm a Jew who makes my way to heaven, then by definition the "muslim god" will in fact be there. As will be the "christian god" and the "jewish god" because they are all the same one God.

>the teachings of each religion cannot coexist

They coexist now, but it sounds like you think I'm claiming that none of the teachings of those religions conflict. I'm not saying that.

>You cannot count muslims, jews and christians as belonging to the same religion. sorry, you cant just make up the rules.

Sorry, where are the rules posted? I guess I forgot to even read them. lol I could make a similar statement like "you can't just exclude who I'm allowed to count. Sorry, you can't just make up the rules" :)

>you will hardly find anyone who can logically accept one and not the other.

I'm guessing you've never lived in the southeastern United States. MLK Jr is not, even today, universally loved. In fact, I heard that he was even killed by a Christian.

>Until religion becomes a solely private matter I certainly wont be happy.

Bourbon helps. :)

For little kids, books like Goodnight Moon, The Velveteen Rabbit, Mama Do You Love Me?, the Corduroy Bear Series, the Beatrix Potter books (Peter Rabbit, The Tale of Tom Kitten, The Tale of Mr. Tod, etc) are all amazing. Also The Poky Little Puppy, The Original Winnie the Pooh books, and Paddington Bear are all great.

Magic Tree House is a good series for 5/6+.

Get an anthology of Grimm's Fairy Tales for ages 8+. Percy Jackson and the Olympians books are good to introduce Greek Myths to kids. As they get older, a Shakespeare anthology for children, like this one can be really awesome as well. My aunt got books like these for me to introduce me to classic literature as I grew up.

Hope this helps!

Unfortunately this is pretty typical.

There are a lot of great books about parents badmouthing each other that might give you some strategy tips:

Divorce Poison

Divorce Casualties

Adult Children of Parental Alienation Syndrome

There are also some books for young kids to help them handle divorce like Two Homes, Dinosaurs Divorce and The Invisible String. Kids really need examples of other kids in their position to understand they're not alone, and books can help with that.

I know this is really hard, but it's also a relatively short time since they split up (year & a half, right?) and there is a definite adjustment period. Just stay positive and don't bash her dad in return. You can respond with things like "I'm sorry your dad feels hurt" or "I'm sure it feels like that to him" or similar neutral statements, but you don't want to put her in the middle by saying he's a liar.

Most of all, you cannot change anyone, no matter how shitty he's being, so make a plan that doesn't involve him suddenly starting to respect you. You have to work around that and find other ways.

The best thing you and your wife can do is lead by example. Stay positive, change the subject, show by your actions that you're good people who are not doing whatever he's accusing you of.

In the meantime, DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. If you end up in court, you will need to show a history of his negativity. One of the custody factors judges weigh is which parent is more likely to foster a positive relationship with the other parent. If one parent is repeatedly bashing & badmouthing the other, the judge will not look kindly on that.

You may also consider family counseling for you & your wife & daughter.

Good luck. I've been there, and it is no fun whatsoever.

:internet hugs::

I read "Oh Crap! Potty Training". The author's recommendation is to not start until they are at least 20months and can sing their ABCs. My kid was speech delayed at that age and definitely couldn't sing her ABCs (and still can't, at 2.5yrs), but we dove in right at 20m and she trained super easily compared to most of my friends' kids, even training for naps and nights. It took us like 2w to get to where I felt like I could leave the house without accidents. And she learned to say "pee pee" when she had to use the bathroom, so that was a plus.

My second born will be 20m in 1 week and I can't decide if I want to dive in and go through 2 weeks of potty training accidents to get the sweetness of never needing diapers again. It's a tough call to make!

Anyways, we used the little separate training potty at first, so that she could put herself on her potty and go pee, and then eventually moved up to setting her on the toilet with an insert which was necessary for using the restroom during outings. By the time I potty trained her, she was also sleeping in a big kid bed already which was super helpful.. I would sit her little potty on a waterproof mat on her floor and if she woke up from her nap, she could quickly sit herself on her potty before I could even get in there. She rarely had accidents in bed.

We read a lot of books about toilets... "Everybody Poops", "Potty Time", and "Once Upon a Potty". Some other books I liked were "Diapers are Not Forever", "Potty", and "Let's Go Potty, Elmo!".

Gonna Copy/Paste from another thread:

Teen Superheros:

Please Don't Tell My Parents I'm a Supervillain by Richard Roberts (Three children of superheros develop powers and accidently become supervillains. Good writing, very clever worldbuilding and characterization. Interesting love triangle You've probably seen it advertised as "What if Harry Potter were steampunk?" but underneath the obvious cashgrab advertising is a great book)

Sidekicks by Jack Ferraiolo (Two sidekicks-One of a superhero, another of a supervillian, learn that they go to the same school, and develop a romance. Excellent Writing, especially for a children's book. Cute romance, and realistic characterization of the main characters at the age they're at without being either condescending or simplistic, interesting twist on superhero/supervillian dynamics. Be careful, since the title's genericness means its possible to get the wrong book)

The Vindico by Wesley King. (5 children are kidnapped by a team of supervillains in an attempt to train apprentices. Generally sold as "The Breakfast Club meets X-Men", which it somewhat lives up to. Good plot, nice twist both on traditional super villain roles and "school for supers" idea)

Realistic Fiction:

The Theif Lord by Cornelia Funke. (Two Orphans run away to Venice and join a group of runaways taken care of by "The Thief Lord", a child master thief. Clever Plot, and the writing really takes you in)

The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton (Written by 16 year old who really lived in similar conditions. Plot revolves around "Ponyboy", a member of a Greaser gang in the 60s, and his life after a gang fight goes wrong. You really care about people who would otherwise serve as hoodlums in another novel)

Sci-fi:

A Confusion of Princes by Garth Nix. (A Prince, one of a few million of the rulers of a galactic empire, becomes tangled in a web of plots and conspiracies. Good sci-fi with excellent world building. Watching the main character learn how dangerous his life has become and slowly adapt to it)

Red Rising by Pierce Brown (After the death of his wife, a member of the lowest Red caste is disguised and made into a member of the ruling Gold caste in order to infiltrate the ruling society. "Ender, Katniss, and now Darrow" was the quote that got me into this. Lives up to it. Reads like a more violent Hunger Games, and goes places the HG didn't. Excellent read, and the main character's intelligence make him more than just an angry revenger. Some slightly guessable "plot twists", but does a good job exploring the theme of unfairness and winning against a stacked deck.)

Levithan by Scott Westerfield. (Alternate World War One, where the allies use genetic manipulation to create huge beasts of burden and war, while the Central powers use huge steampunk machines. Plot follows a girl who dresses as a boy to join in the ranks of an air force, who meets an Austrian Prince on the run from the German Empire)

Fantasy/Horror:

The Spook's Apprentice by Joseph Delany (Seventh son gets appreticed to the local spook, a man who fights magical threats around the County. Does a unique job of showing its monsters and boogeymen, with a plot that builds over the course of the books.)

Cirque Du Freak (Boy becomes a half-vampire, traveling with a circus of freaks. Most action takes place away from the circus and towards the other vampires in the world. 12 books that are really 4 trilogies, which ought to be 4 books. Nice job of presenting unique vampires. Actual horror varies, although I've heard good things about the Demonata series by the same author, which I haven't read.)

The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman. (First line: "There was a hand in the darkness, and it held a knife." Plot is series of vignettes about boy being raised by a group of ghosts in a graveyard. Gaiman gets pretty good reviews overall, and for good reason.)

The Midnighters Series by Scott Westerfield (Girl moves to new town and discovers she is one of a very few who can access the "Secret Hour"- An extra hour when time is frozen at midnight, along with gaining new powers. Her and a few select others fight ancient beasts who were the last predators of ancient man.)

This is a method developed for breastfeeding, bed sharing families: http://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html

It doesn't sound easy, but it might make more sense for you than Ferber? See what you think. I was also recommended this book: http://www.amazon.com/Nursies-When-Shines-Katherine-Havener/dp/0615756425. I've heard some people say they've had great success with that.

Good luck, I hope you find something that helps!

You are doing what's best for your kids by living close by and being involved. Seriously, good on you and your ex-wife for looking past your issues with each other to what's best for your little ones. To ease your daughter's separation anxiety, the best thing to do is to
a) be consistent, and
b) hammer it in at both homes that even when one parent is absent, they are loved unconditionally by both.
I bought this book to read to my son after his father moved out, and it carries that message across with beautiful, simple words and illustrations.

http://www.amazon.ca/Two-Homes-Claire-Masurel/dp/0763619841

Good luck to you and your little ones!

Never too early to start! It's good for them to hear your voice and be exposed to lots of spoken language even if they can't focus on pages yet or show obvious interest.

During the potato stage, I read aloud whatever I was reading, read random children's books, and would also hold up high contrast picture books (like this). High contrast patterns are especially attractive to young babies because their vision isn't very good at first, and those were definitely the first ones she showed signs of interest in.

As she got able to grab stuff, we liked having some fabric/crinkly books, and the "indestructible" books like this are also great because they don't tear and can be washed.

For the most part, though, we just have regular board books. Stuff by Sandra Boynton are favorites in our house, as are the "touch and feel" kind. My baby is in the "must grab any available paper and try to eat it" stage, so non-board books with pages that can be torn are temporarily off the table for us, but I'm so excited for when she's old enough to handle those!

You don't need all the different kinds of books I mention, and most libraries also have board books in the children's section. Reading to your baby every day is one of the best things you can do for him, however you go about it.

Edit: Wow, that got long. Um, can you tell I like books?

Sounds like she needs it to be her idea. Tell her it's ok if she doesn't want panties. Give her diapers, take the potty away an stuff it in the basement somewhere. Don't mention the potty again for 3 months.
After 3 months try again.
Get a book about going on the potty. I recommend http://www.amazon.com/Potty-Leslie-Patricelli-board-books/dp/0763644765. It's simple and funny and you can easily modify the words to suit your family.
The other thing that will be helpful is identifying her currency. If she goes bananas for stickers, than reward potty success with stickers. For my dd it was candy.
The method is the tricky part. You know your kid best. We put out kid on the potty every hour or so until she got the control down. Now we ask periodically if she needs to go, but generally she tells us. Forget pull-ups, they're just diapers. Go panties in the house, clean up lots of messes, it doesn't take long. Try not to shame her for having accidents, but don't tell her it's ok. Remind her that big girls go on the potty, clean up and carry on.
Good luck

Here are some recommendations of books for girls, from past discussions:

***

Feminist Parenting: Struggles, Triumphs & Comic Interludes


>This collection of essays, stories, and poetry edited by Taylor (Women of the 14th Moon, LJ 10/1/91) includes 61 contributions from feminists sharing their parenting experiences. Unlike Carrie Carmichael's Non-Sexist Childraising (1977), this is not so much a how-to book as a collection of short reports from the home front detailing successes-and some failures-in the struggle to raise children free of sexism, racism, and homophobia. In an apt summary for the whole collection, Rosalind Warren writes, "It's not easy teaching a handsome little middle-class white boy to think like a feminist-everybody else is telling him that the world is his oyster; meanwhile we're telling him he has to share." Other noteworthy contributors include Anna Quind-len, Audre Lorde, and Ms. magazine's Robin Morgan. While this book will have to search for an audience of parents who actually have time to read, it is recommended for public libraries. [See also Mother Journeys]

100 Young Adult Books for the Feminist Reader - http://bitchmagazine.org/100-young-adult-books-for-the-feminist-reader

The Amelia Bloomer project http://libr.org/ftf/bloomer.html

Some past recommendations from our users about inspiring/strong young women:

• "The Fault in Our stars, Visible Amazement, anything by Tamora Pierce (especially the lioness, protector of the small, and trickster series') Persepolis."
  
  
• Hunger Games Trilogy
  
  
• "Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston. It's pretty old, came right out of the Harlem Renaissance. Its about her relationships with different men, and how in each of the relationships she takes a different role. It also reveals a lot of the racial zeitgeist, as well as women's issues. Plus, it's a love story, and who doesn't love a good love story?"
  
  
• A Wrinkle in Time
  
  
• Native Tongue
  
  
• "HIS DARK MATERIALS by Philip Pullman. Lyra is amaazing. Lirael and Abhorsen are great too."
  
  
• "Left to Tell. It's a true story told by a woman who survuved the massacres in Rwanda, and how she overcame the obstacles during and after. It's a very compelling read."
  
  
• "Lynne Andrews-Medicine Woman Jean Auel-Clan of the Cave Bear Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes-Women Who Run with the Wolves"
  
  
• "detective novels by Laura Lippman, who is an excellent writer. Her protagonist, Tess Monaghan, solves mysteries in Baltimore."
  
  
• "Not One Damsel in Distress: World Folktales for Strong Girls by Jane Yolen"
  
  
• "The Paper Bag Princess. Not only is it empowering to young girls, it lampoons the whole "I'll just wait here helpless for my Prince charming to come rescue me" mentality you find so often in disney films. "
  
  http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2009/dec/04/feminist-books-five-year-olds
  
  http://www.amightygirl.com/books
  
  http://www.amazon.com/Mama-Do-You-Love-Me/dp/0811821315/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1392687674&sr=1-1&keywords=mama+do+you+love+me
  
  Coraline by Neil Gaiman is full of adventure, and is even named after a girl!

Mine is 2.5 and we are potty training as well thou our situation is slightly different.
Mine started pooping on the potty before he was 2 about 90% of the time and now almost always will poop on the potty unless we slack and leave him too long when he wakes in his crib. That said peeing on the potty was a battle, he would fight me and argue and scream when i tried and i would get so frustrated. I finally stopped forcing him and followed his lead but we continued to talk about potty and watch mommy go potty and read tons of potty books.
He loved the potty books. Will link below the ones we have. Then i also got a star chart and man does he love watching it get filled with stars. We are now doing great with training.
I still let him wear pullups in the morning because i am pregnant and it has me pretty tired and sick in the morning plus we are on the couch or carpeted area. Once he wakes from nap we switch to underwear and he stays dry with me setting timers every 40 mins, once timer goes off we say time for potty and he says "siri says go potty" lol so we run and both go potty. Then we high five and run and do our stars more high fives, huge yays etc. he stays in underwear until bed.
Also many people in our 2-3 class we do just go bottomless so maybe if she won't wear underwear let her go without and see if that works. They all recommend that oh crap method.
Kenson Kids “I Can Do It!” Potty Chart Updated Toilet Training System! Includes Colorful Magnetic Chart, 30 Positive-Reinforcement Stars, Potty Training Book, Achievement Certificate, and Training Tips for Parents https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00FFF9T1Q/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_CtLmzb7GG9BC4
Potty (Leslie Patricelli board books) https://www.amazon.com/dp/0763644765/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_huLmzbBFJ36KP
These books i have used to break a lot of unwanted habits like hitting, kicking and his paci... just ordered yelling since he started that
Diapers Are Not Forever (Board Book) (Best Behavior Series) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1575422964/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_UuLmzbS6Q6KAN

Also if you do screen time the daniel tiger potty episode is awesome, he watched that for everyday for awhile and now he sings it

Will edit as I go

1. Her name is blue, she is blue, and she sings “blue’s clues,” so...

2. He’a wearing sunglasses, he also sings “In Summer.”

3) These are actually pretty good.

4) My brother is obsessed with these movies.

5) This is a very profound book. Made me feel a full breadth of emotion, and left me satisfied at the end.

6) this decorative fan

7) Your dog could be the pope!

8) I love potatoes. I love plushies. Obvious choice.

9) Jurassic Park is the film that made me fall in love with movies. It’s fun, emotional, and a testament to the ingenuity, curiosity, and perseverance of humanity. Also dinosaurs are in it.

10) After the zombies arrive, I’ll want safe drinking water. It’ll be important, and maybe hard to find occasionally.

11) A new laptop would make being a writer much easier. My current laptop is slow and doesn’t want to work half the time.

12) Lysol wipes are never a bad idea. Trust me.

13) Star Trek is my favorite everything.

14) How about an inspiring dress?

15) Why not both?

16) This stuff. I love it so much.

17) I loved this weird Barbie doll.

18) You know when you’re out in public, and you think of this great idea, but by the time you get home you forgot it and wish you’d written it down? Yeah. I hate that.

19) Here.

20) My dad used to own a pair of these.

Okay so I have two recommendations:

The Book Thief: http://www.amazon.com/Book-Thief-Markus-Zusak/dp/0375842209/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1302109748&sr=8-1" is I think technically a kids book, and it's about a girl in Nazi Germany, so offhand it might not sound like it's for you BUT it's narrated by Death and his timing is amazing. Even if sometimes the punchlines are more like a punch to the gut.

And Tanya Huff has some great, unique fantasy. I'd start with[Sing the Four Quarters: http://www.amazon.com/Sing-Four-Quarters-Tanya-Huff/dp/0886776287/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1302109846&sr=8-1, where certain special people can sing to control the four elements, and everyone is snarky and different and fun to be around. Or... at least fun to read about.

My daughter is 8 and I just had "the talk" with her as well. I bought her [this] ( http://www.amazon.com/Its-So-Amazing-Families-Library/dp/0763613215) book as well as "The Care and Keeping of You", which was basically my bible as a preteen. She had a lot of basic questions about sex and sexuality (I'm a lesbian living with my partner of 4 years but I was previously married to her father) and the first book addresses everything very clearly in an age appropriate way. I believe being frank and talking about sex and the changes her body will undergo in an open and honest way is the best approach. My daughter wasn't embarrassed, neither was I, and now she knows better than to believe half-truths about sex and periods from her schoolmates!

I really want you to get her these books:

The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman This is a great story and a Newbury winner. It has a little violence, but no more than Harry Potter. Fantastic book.

Also, a series by Terry Pratchett about a young girl who becomes a witch, and her entourage of hilarious Scottish fairies (but don't call them fairies). These books are really excellent, and I recommend them to anyone who is looking for a series for a young girl. I can't stress enough how great they are.

You can get all 4 of them here in paperback for only $30.

This list needs more Neil Gaiman.


Children/YA books: Coraline, The Graveyard Book, and Stardust are my favs. Do yourself a favor and read the version illustrated by Charles Vess, it is far superior to the (non-illustrated) mass-market paperback. I would link to it, but I can't seem to find it on Amazon. Sorry.

Now, at no point did you ask for short-fiction, though I would think it fits your criteria of being able to pick up and set down at a moment's notice, so I'm gonna rec some fine short fiction as well. Smoke and Mirrors is quite good, as is Fragile Things.

Now as long as I'm here I would be remiss if I did not at least mention The Princess Bride and the Discworld novels of Terry Pratchett. I linked to the first one in the series, but it has been my experience that you can read them in just about any order you want with very little trouble. I usually just go to my local library and grab whichever one strikes my fancy. Terry Pratchett is an amazing storyteller and he also made a sword out of metal ore mined from a meteor after being knighted. That is a true thing that happened. I kid you not. Read his books. They will make your life better. Also to bring this comment full circle, he co-authored a book with Neil Gaiman called Good Omens that is just fantastic.

This is a good book for young children (and their parents) for dealing with death. I Miss You: A First Look at Death https://www.amazon.com/dp/0764117645/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_guVGxbRXJ7BSE

At three, she's going to need answers but not too many details that could scare or confuse her. If you believe in heaven, you could say "daddy went to heaven and we can't see him anymore, but we will always love and remember him. And he loved you very much." Or if you're not religious, you can say "daddy died. That means his body doesn't work any more and we can't visit him, but we will always love and remember daddy." You may want to give her a photo of her and her dad. Some parents give their child a stuffed animal/lovey that they say that the parent wants them to have to remind them of how much they are loved and to be able to squeeze when she's missing daddy. I'm sorry you're going through this and I hope you find peace for both of you.

1. mindset adjustment: if this is a one-time thing, everyone will feel overwhelmed. Set up to have approximately two thousand chats over the next few decades. Each one, low stakes. Don't enter into it feeling like you must transmit all the facts. The most important pay of it is creating a dynamic where he feels ok asking you things in future. Keep it free flowing, follow his lead. Kids often don't get as deep or weird as we think, or may go completely sideways. Go with him.
   .2) I love the entire series by Robie Harris. They have age appropriate book for late toddlers, gradeschoolers, adolescent kids. Each one goes over normal biology, "safe touch", and what's happening in a developing body at that point. I bought them, I read through them with my kids, I leave them out so they can check back. It's So Amazing!: A Book about Eggs, Sperm, Birth, Babies, and Families (The Family Library) https://www.amazon.com/dp/0763613215/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_17GFAbZ64JX5S
   .3) explicitly let your kids know that, while you always hope they can speak to you about stuff, is also normal for people to feel sometimes oddly shy about certain topics, and here's a list of other safe adults to talk to.

Board books :

• Bright Baby series by Roger Priddy is the best set of "first books" / "learn words" books. Animals (yellow book), colors (pink) are two of the best.
  
• Leslie Patricelli: Baby Happy Baby Sad No No Yes Yes and yummy yucky, huggy kissy are also good. (note, do not just read the words, use them for discussion of the pictures)
  
• guess how much I love you
  
• [Barnyard Dance!] (https://www.amazon.com/dp/1563054426/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_sUXKzbXMP2DV2) and others by Sandra Boynton
  
• Goodnight Moon by Margaret wise brown
  
  Picture books:
  
  
• Goodnight, Goodnight Construction Site (also, the train book is lame, skip it)
  
• mommy do you love me by Jeanne Willis
  
• The Maggie b by Irene haas
  
• [tough chicks] (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003V4B4TI/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_eyXKzbV4CF825) by cece meng
  
• sweet briar goes to school (and goes to camp) by karma wilson
  
• [Move It!: Motion, Forces and You] (https://www.amazon.com/dp/1553377591/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_6IXKzbJ00G260)
  
  Early readers:
  
  
• Elephant and Piggie series by Mo Willems (bird on your head, broke my trunk, play the trumpet are faves)
  
• Mr Putter and Tabby series by Ryland (faves are paint the porch, feed the fish, run the race)
  
• Harry the Dirty Dog
  
• Ready-Set-Grow series by Joy Wilt Berry (eg Mine and Yours: A Children's Book About Rights and Responsibilities ) are the most impactful series of books I have ever encountered. They cover emotional and social issues and life skills in a simple, clear way with silly illustrations, and were the major contributors to my emotional maturity.
  
  Chapter books to read together in early elementary:
  
  
• The first three little house books: little house in the big woods, little house on the prairie, farmer boy. Should be read together to discuss issues like racial prejudice/native American displacement, and discipline in the 1800s, but they are super valuable books to understanding how pioneers and farmers lived. The later books are for more mature kids, due to the hardships the family goes through.
  
• EB White books : Charlotte's web, trumpet of the swan
  
  Chapter books for later elementary or middle school:
  
  
• in general, Newbury award books
  
• Island of the blue dolphins
  
• The slave dancer
  
• my side of the mountain (high reading level due to archaic style)
  
• The False Prince Jennifer Nielsen
  
• The Shamer's Daughter series by Lene Kaaberbol is a great series to use for thinking about compassion and responsibility for those we care about, how guilt and shame require the guilty person to agree with an assessment that their actions were wrong; truth, lies, and stories; assumptions and false accusations; and other ways in which right and wrong may be determined.... But it is a very exciting and compelling story. It does have some cursing (damn, hell) and abusive behavior (brother beating and calling his tween sister a whore, evil ruler locking people up and feeding to a dragon), so check for maturity. But it is an absolutely amazing series that I can not recommend enough.
  
  Am posting on phone so will be submitting and editing. This will be a long post.

Ditto. But maybe not family therapy per se. If they kiddos are young (under 8 or 9), they may or may not have the linguistic ability to really express how they feel. But play therapy should be incorporated as well as that is how children work their feelings. Then, a good therapist can help decipher the themes of their play and what the kiddo needs. They can also recommend good books. I suggest getting The Invisible String and A Terrible Thing Happened.

Also, I'm so so sorry for your loss. Make sure to take care of yourself as well if you begin to feel overwhelmed.

EDIT: I'm sorry I got over-excited about sharing information. But therapy may not be necessary. I work with trauma a lot and there's saying "We treat symptoms, not events." Some kids are incredibly resilient and can bounce back without therapy at all.

Hi u/ting4ling,

Kara here, OP's wife, (As I said to another redditor, I'm basically the PR person for our biz as my husband tbh isn't the best typist or as patient with giving thoughtful replies).

First off, glad you think they're cool and glad you love books. The awesome thing is that we never ever ever ever would cut a limited edition or rare irreplaceable edition, (couldn't afford one anyway).

As you know, e-books abound! We buy real, paper books which makes the publisher print a new book to replace it to sell to a reader. It would be a tragedy if print went out. It's sad to see bookstores closing. I've provided here a handy-dandy list of ways to get access to J.K. Rowling's awesome work, and it would be mostly the same access for most of the books we cut for our business:

• Kindle $0 with KindleUnlimited or $8.99 to buy
  
• Hardcover Starting at under $4.00 used or under $12.00 new
  
• Paperback Starting at $0.01 used or under $7.00 new
  
• Audible Free with Audible trial
  
• Mass Market Paperback Starting at $0.01 used and under $5.00 new
  
• Audio CD kinda pricey at over $20.00
  
  ***
  
  The above listings are just on Amazon, of course there's:
  
  
• Countless listings both used and new on eBay
  
• New copies on Barnes & Noble online and in stores
  
• Indie booksellers online and in stores,
  
• Public libraries lending in real books and e-books
  
• 2nd-hand bookstores (altho extremely rare to get a Harry Potter at a used bookstore as they're in high demand, believe me, I've looked)
  
  ***
  
  Let's all go forth and buy real books for whatever reason, seriously, we need to support print.
  
  edit: formatting

We just did this last January! Toddler loves this book and I've heard of other kids liking it too. There are barely any words or character development or any story at all, but its like potty training crack for kids.


This was my diaper bag potty seat and this lives in my car for emergencies where there are not toilets around. I've only used it twice, but I was SO HAPPY it was there.


We didn't do pull-ups during the day at all once we'd committed to underwear. I always make sure she goes pee before we leave and I ask her multiple times while we're out if she has to go. If we're out for an extended time, we have an obligatory bathroom trip somewhere in the middle. We do pull-ups at night still, though she is dry about 90% of the time. I'm not sure what we'll do the next time we go on an airplane. I'm going to make that a game time decision.

For some reason u/Hirste-Lukov's latests comment has disappeared from the thread, so I'll reply to myself I guess.

"source for pro-sodomy books"

"source for chemicals in the water which turn animals into sodomites"

Thank you for these. Now, I must refer back to your original comment:

"The UN admitted in documents they released that they literally dump chemicals in the water which have been proven to turn animals gay"

This article does not mention the United Nations at all, nor any documents published by any research body whatsoever, as such your original claim is disproven. Please refrain from making things up in the future if you would ever even dream of being taken seriously in any kind of argument ever, which admittedly you may not want to be and solely want to inflate your ego, however I'm not here to judge that. Incidentally, I actually did find this Infowars article myself, but thought too blatantly fantastical and lacking in discrete evidence (no links to any papers or statistics) to ever possibly consider it grounds for any serious opinion, so I discarded it to look for something concrete. I'm sorry for mistakenly having any faith in you to find reliable sources of information, I'll try my best to correct this in future.

Furthermore, this article specifically talks about Atrazine and Simazine. To quote the US EPA,

"There were no risks of concern identified for the chlorotriazine 4-day cumulative dietary (food only) exposure and risk assessment or for the 4-day dietary cumulative aggregate (food + drinking water) exposure and risk assessment. There were no cumulative risks of concern for the chronic dietary (food only) or screening level aggregate (food + drinking water) assessment for the hydroxytriazines."

(Source https://www.regulations.gov/contentStreamer?documentId=EPA-HQ-OPP-2013-0266-1160&contentType=pdf)

So there: The supposed Gay Bomb which is turning Bonobos and frogs around the world gay has no risks of concern. To quote another document on Simazine,

"There is direct evidence that simazine is associated with neuroendocrine disruption. Direct measurements of serum hormones such as certain steroid hormones and luteinizing hormone, as well as changes in estrus cycling and histomorphic changes in hormone responsive tissues, indicate neuroendocrine disruption. EPA has responded, in part, to simazine’s known neuroendocrine disrupting capacity by regulating on endpoints based on neuroendocrine disruptor effects and requiring risk mitigation measures, label amendments, and additional confirmatory data to reduce potential risks to below the Agency’s levels of concern. The Agency has determined that, with label amendments and changes as specified in this document, there is a reasonable certainty that no harm will result to the general U.S. population, infants, children, or other major identifiable subgroups of consumers, from the use of simazine"

(Source https://archive.epa.gov/pesticides/reregistration/web/pdf/simazine_red.pdf)

So, no, Atrazine isn't harmful, and although Simazine has an effect there is "reasonable certainty" that it doesn't cause harm. I appreciate that the latter of these documents is rather old, however from what I know Simazine is used much less frequently than Astrazine, so I think that from both of these it can be concluded that they are safe. As an addendum, I generally disagree with the high-intensity, high-chemical farming practiced in the United States on principle, so I can partially understand your concern, but I can't disagree with multi-million dollar papers made by people with far more expertise in agriculture than I could possibly ever posses.

​

As for the "pro-sodomy" books, the first is "And Tango Makes Three", a story about how two male penguins who love each other adopt a daughter and live happily together. The most notable aspect is that it features NO SEX at all. No heterosexual intercourse, no homosexual intercourse, nothing! How can a book with no sex possibly advocate sex? In the video, the argument given (by both the interviewer and the interviewee, and never challenged by either) is that by telling young children stories about gay couples, they're being implicitly teaching them about sex.

no.

They are NOT teaching children ANYTHING about sex in these books. If reading children story books about gay penguins is teaching them about sexual intercourse, then every storybook that's ever involed a mother and a father has done so too! There are thousands, if not millions of books aimed at very young children which talk about straight married couples within a typical nuclear family which have been read to children for decades, and nobody seems to have a fault with them pushing their heterosexualisation of children because they don't heterosexualise children, just as 'And Tango Makes Three' doesn't homosexualise them either.

The second is "My Princess Boy", which is about a very feminine boy who wears very feminine clothes. It's quite notably written in the third person from the perspective of the mother of the eponymous boy. You only need to look at the preview pages on Amazon (https://www.amazon.com/My-Princess-Boy-Cheryl-Kilodavis/dp/1442429887) to see that it doesn't idolise the boy anymore than a mother would talk highly of her own child, rather it only says that HE EXISTS. It talks about how he loves his family, how they love him, and how he loves playing with his friends and he can be free to dress and acts as he likes! What part of that is perverse! Why shouldn't boys be allowed to do something as innocuous as wear a dress? It's not like he's having sex with anyone, or even taking any hormones; it's just a pink skirt! And despite what the interviewer says, the boy isn't trans. If the books was about a boy who was trans, it wouldn't have "Boy" in the title.

The Book Thief looks like a fantastic movie (I still haven't seen it) and I'm hoping it's an even better book!! Thanks for the awesome contest!

Get books then and read them together. The ones in our sidebar are pretty good and the best part is Amazon has a little carousel of related books so you can quite easily end up finding a whole shelf full of potential content.

One particularly good book to promote skepticism is Maybe Yes, Maybe No: A Guide for Young Skeptics

The page says its for older children but if you read the reviews you'll find it's just fine for kids your daughter's age as well.

There is also the Awkward Moments Children's Bible, Vol. 1

Which says it isn't for children and I'm going to hee and haw about that as I feel the Bible itself is inappropriate for Children and I further feel it is dishonest that many children's Bible's gloss over some bad parts in order to only sew a dishonest sense of good feelings in children through cherry picking which I would challenge most people to distinguish from indoctrination, brainwashing, whatever you want to call it -- they're weaponized books and the authors often carefully study child psychology to maximize indoctrination potential. If you get it maybe read over it yourself before deciding if it's appropriate, I'd definitely give it to a teenager without reservation but younger children it depends on how mature they are and what you want them exposed to.

Anyways best of luck!

The following are some of my favorite books that I could think of off the top of my head. Hopefully you dig the list.

• Oscar Wilde - Picture of Dorian Gray
  
• David Sedaris - Me Talk Pretty One Day
  
• Gabriel García Márquez - One Hundred Years of Solitude
  
• Charles Bukowski - post office
  
• Ned Vizzini - It's Kind of a Funny Story
  
• Tom Robbins - Jitterbug Perfume
  
• Nick Hornby - High Fidelity
  
• Chuck Palahniuk - Survivor
  
• Charles Bukowski - Ham on Rye
  
• Sylvia Plath - The Bell Jar
  
• Fyodor Dostoyevsky - Notes From Underground
  
• Douglas Adams - The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
  
• Voltaire - Candide
  
• Jack Kerouac - The Dharma Bums
  
• Christopher Moore - Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal
  
• Katherine Dunn - Geek Love
  
• Kitty Fitzgerald - Pigtopia
  
• Kazuo Ishiguro - Never Let Me Go
  
• John Kennedy Toole - A Confederacy of Dunces
  
• C. D. Payne - Youth in Revolt: The Journals of Nick Twisp
  
• Jeffrey Eugenides - Middlesex
  
• Peter Conn - The Good Earth
  
• John Steinbeck - Grapes of Wrath
  
• Michael Chabon - The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay
  
• Cormac McCarthy - All the Pretty Horses, the Crossing, Cities of the Plain
  
• Philip Roth - American Pastoral
  
• James Clavell - Shogun (The Asian Saga Chronology)
  
• Christopher Moore - A Dirty Job
  
• Yann Martel - Life of Pi
  
• Jonathan Safran Foer - Everything is Illuminated
  
• Miranda July - No One Belongs Here More Than You
  
• Dave Eggers - A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
  
• Ian McEwan - Atonement
  
• Joan Didion - The Year of Magical Thinking
  
• Jonathan Acuff - Stuff Christians Like
  
• Craig Thompson - Blankets
  
• Markus Zusak - The Book Thief
  
• Zadie Smith - White Teeth
  
• Orhan Pamuk - My Name is Red
  
• Tom Robbins - Still Life With Woodpecker
  
• Fyodor Dostoevsky - The Brothers Karamazov
  
• Ken Kesey - One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
  
• John Irving - The World According to Garp
  
• John Irving - A Prayer for Owen Meany
  
• Stephen King - The Shining
  
• Vladimir Nabokov - Lolita
  
• Franz Kafka - The Trial
  
• Kurt Vonnegut - Slaughterhouse Five
  
• Mark Z. Danielewski - House of Leaves

Some of my very favorites:

ELL/Immigrant:

The Name Jar

My Name is Yoon

My Name is Sangoel

Ability:

Jessica's Box

My Brother, Charlie

ZOOM!

My Three Best Friends and Me, Zulay

LGBTQ+:

And Tango Makes Three

Worm Loves Worm

Introducing Teddy

My Princess Boy

Does she like books? There’s Good Night Stories For Rebel Girls. Which is AMAZING. One paged stories about amazing women throughout history which are very palatable for reading right before bed. There’s also this which is great too. There’s a whole series of these kind too.

The book on my sons WL is a buck thirteen over, could I have a GC in any amount and I could pay the rest if I'm a winner. It's called Goodnight Goodnight Construction Site. We have another book by the same author and we really enjoy it, probably read it at bedtime 5 out of 7 nights. This one is supposed to be even better.

Now for your daughter. I used to read this book when I was a child and it just captivated me. For some reason, even when I was younger the book had a very vintage feel to it, which made it very special to me. I would almost cry at certain parts. Anyway it's called Mrs. Suzy and it's a beautiful book.

Green Eggs and Ham