(Part 2) Reddit mentions: The best home testing kits

\> So it seems we’re both healthy and doing all the standard stuff, to have sex every other day, with the key day being 14 days after the first day of your cycle etc etc.

*note - skip to the last paragraph if you only want a response to your direct question*

I would strongly recommend tracking ovulation. 14 days after the first day of your period might be an accurate date for some women to ovulate, but it may very well not be for you. Also, you're most likely to get pregnant on the 2nd and 1st days prior to ovulation (because sperm needs to be in the fallopian tubes ready to meet the egg which takes time, the egg only spends 12-24 hours in your fallopian tubes, and sperm can last up to 5 days inside you), so its important to try and have sex before ovulation.

I track using a combo of tempting and using OPKs (ovulation predictor kits). I use [this](https://www.amazon.com/Basal-Body-Thermometer-BBT-113Ai-Temperature/dp/B07KB2QFDY/ref=sr_1_14?crid=2W5KN789ZPDMU&keywords=bbt+thermometer&qid=1569518618&sprefix=bbt%2Caps%2C768&sr=8-14) thermometer to take my temperature upon first waking up each morning and I use [these](https://www.amazon.com/PREGMATE-Ovulation-Strips-Predictor-Pregnancy/dp/B01G5WGNVQ/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=pregmate+opk&qid=1569518667&sr=8-1) to detect ovulation. Tracking your temperature can only confirm ovulation after the fact, so if you're only going to use one method, I'd suggest the OPKs. The temperature tracking though for me is nice because it lets me see averages across my cycles and also gives me comfort knowing that I did actually ovulate (OPKs detect your lutenizing hormone surge, but you can have a surge and not ovulate). The OPK instructions will tell you what day to begin testing, but personally I'd recommend starting 2-3 days earlier than they recommend. The general advice is that once you get a positive, have sex every day for the next 3-4 days. However, if 3-4 days days in a row is a lot, do it the day you get a positive, take a day off, then do it again the next day.

Another option is to use what they call an "advanced" OPK. The ones I linked are only considered positive if the test line is as dark as or darker than the control line. So theoretically they are only detecting your "peak" LH surge. An advanced OPK is designed to detect both "high" and "peak" LH surges, and this can give you another day or two of "advance notice". Also, since your peak LH surge might be anywhere from 12-36 hours in advance of ovulation (this is another reason why tracking your temperature can be useful, you can narrow down about how much time passes between peak LH surge and ovulation), it may turn out that you have a bigger or smaller window to have sex after you get that peak OPK.

That said, even with the basic OPKs you can see the test line getting darker over time if you start testing early enough. So when I first notice the line getting darker, I let DH know and we have sex that day, then when the test line is most dark, and then depending on how my temps look and the time between the first and second sex, we might do it again the day after the super positive OPK or two days after (knowing that this last session is a "just in case" I ovulate late, and probably doesn't increase chances of getting pregnant).

Now for your actual question - I really, really feel you on the sex scheduling thing. Neither me nor my DH like it, and it does make sex feel like a chore. Especially for him because honestly I don't have to orgasm to make this happen. When we're not TTC, we're 1x per week people, which is just not going to work to make a baby. As of right now, I put on our shared calendar when I estimate my fertile window is going to be when I start the first day of my cycle. As we get close to the opening of the fertile window I remind him to refrain from having "personal time" and we also don't have sex in order to increase our motivation during the fertile window. Then when we need to have sex I am blunt and tell him that we're going to need to have sex that day (I do my best to tell him in the morning). Then later in the day (we're SUPER not morning sex people, plus we both work so daytime sex usually doesn't happen) I go out of my way to be as nice as possible and try to put him in the mood, which usually involves squashing the rage I feel when he complains about TTC not being very romantic (really? as if I don't know that? as if I don't put effort every single day into TTC while you only have to do it 3x a month, let along the effort I'll be putting in for the 9 months of pregnancy and the 12+ months of breastfeeding after, ohhhhhkkkkayyyy).

I was given a bluetooth breathalyzer a bit ago which surprisingly, was a great gift. The app is pretty neat and I can now somewhat predict close to what my BAC is without even using it. Neat little conversation starter at the bars too.
Safety benefit is that I can now prove to my friends why they shouldn't be driving with real numbers when we're out together. We've used Uber a heck of a lot more since getting it. Wish I had one in college.

smaller $49 one bactrack vio

larger one $99 I have highly accurate. bactrack mobile


I hope those amazon links work. I just copied what's in my browser bar.

~~ According to bactrack's web site, their three professional range items have the same sensor and 4 digit read out. The biggest difference seems to be response time and case design - as well as the one you linked, there's one with a readout facing the tube, and a mini one that isn't really much smaller then the S80. The S80 wins out on response time - 3 vs 10 secs, but the Element is twenty bucks cheaper and more compact. They both~~

OK who the fuck cares, approved (and presumably used) by the DOT sounds pretty good to me, the price is reasonable, and these guys rate it the best on the market and they're not selling them (I was pleasantly surprised to find that site exists...).

That'd be pretty cool. I currently use a combination of strips to monitor mine:

• Easy@Home bluetooth thermometer for daily basal. My basal temp fluctuates wildly since I have allergies but I did kind of see a trend the one time so far I've ovulated.
  
• Easy@Home LH strips to monitor daily after day CD4-3dpo. These are the cheapies that you can get for 100 for $20. They work but are a bit noisier than I'd like so I use...
  
• Pre-mom semi-quantitative LH strips when it looks like I'm seeing a surge, usually 3dbo to 3dpo.
  
• Proov Progesterone strips (CD8, 3dpo-7dpo) to confirm ovulation.
  
  This is fairly expensive monthly (~$70/mo) but I'm doing unmonitored letrozole cycles right now and so it's cheaper than taking the day off work and driving 6 hours several times.
  
  This gave me a really clear picture last cycle: https://imgur.com/a/o64Eqgz, confirmed with the progesterone strips, and then menstruated exactly 14dpo as expected.
  
  Something like the 10 parameter urinalysis strips that did estrogen, lh, and progesterone each dip would be awesome, or a meter like my blood glucose meter that automatically measured the amounts. It'd probably be insanely expensive, since the progesterone strips themselves are $5 per and the semi-quantitative (high quality) LH strips are $1 per strip.

I would just buy some cheap tests from amazon and probably test every month or so. When I was on nexplanon (arm implant) I wouldn’t get periods at all either, so I would test every month or so.

I like pregmate brand, but any pink dye test will work the best. It’s better to dip these in urine, so you could get disposable cups. I got my positives on these ones the same day that I for positives with the most sensitive (and way more expensive) test called FRER. I think there’s like a 100 strips for $20 dollars.

Actually, this is a great idea - but don't do the boxed tests, especially if you imagine you'll need them more than once. I highly recommend getting strips in bulk from Amazon (like these); they're way cheaper and are just as effective. The same dollar amount would get you maybe seven tests, if you were content with the ones from the dollar tree. If not, then maybe one.

Edit: I missed your 'F'! I'm sure you're more than familiar with the prices on these things, then :) Still - to anyone passing by, if you test compulsively or just like to be sure, grab a packet like this.

It took me over a year to successfully conceive.

Start charting your cycle using BBT charts and an OPK (ovulation predictor kit). The OPKs are super cheap on Amazon and often come w/ a few HPT as an added bonus, this is the brand I used.

Also, don't stress. This takes time and you only have a 20% chance of getting pregnant during each cycle. If you think about it, the egg is only viable for ~12 hours, that is a very short period of time and easy to miss if you don't have a regular cycle or are not very familiar with your body.

And most important - Try to have fun! You're only 26, so you still have lots of time.

I don't know what ordering online would be like for you, but I got this Geratherm Basal Digital (German company) off of Amazon and I'm quite happy with it.
I went of BC after over 10 years on it, and my cycles were really regular, just like I was on BC right away, but I wasn't temping or charting, so I don't know if I was actually ovulating or anything. I'm on my second cycle of charting now and it's really nice just to see that my body is doing something other than bleed regularly.

I'd say yes. It looks like you are temping at different times, so if you throw out the high ones that were early/late, it looks good.

A couple of things:

It's so so so important for me to take my temp at EXACTLY the same time every day. For me, if I temp even 30 min later than usual, it can be .5-1.0 degree higher! I am pretty religious with temping, so I usually just throw those out - it just screws up my chart more than it helps. But the point is that my chart would be impossible to read otherwise. I was really surprised, because hey, I still always take it as soon as I wake up.

That said, it's a lot of work to temp at exactly the same time every day, so maybe consider using OPKs - it helps SO MUCH with this kind of stuff and they really aren't expensive. Once you get the swing of it, I only use 3 - 5/month.

The STM method is the symptothermal method. For Catholics, it's usually taught through the couple to couple league, but it's also the most popular secular method because it's the one taught in Taking Charge of Your Fertility. If you're interested in learning more about fertility at all, this is the go-to book. This method is based on observing at least 2 primary fertility signs (cervical fluid and basal body temperature) and marking the beginning and ending of the fertile period based on the information gathered. A barrier method, withdrawal, outercourse, or abstinence is used during "Phase 2" of the cycle, which is the period between identifying the beginning of fertility and the end of fertility. The advantages of this method are that you can confirm ovulation, for sure--other than an ultrasound, there isn't really a good way to confirm that ovulation is happening. You can assume that it is based on other fertility signs and LH testing (ovulation predictor kits), but that information doesn't prove that ovulation actually occurred.

The Marquette method is primarily an NFP method, so in order to follow the protocol exactly, they require abstinence during the fertile period. That being said, if you're using it secularly, you can use barrier methods if you understand the risk that you are taking.

Marquette uses the Clearblue Advanced Fertility Monitor to track changing estrogen and LH levels in urine. Based on this information, there's a protocol for determining when your fertile period begins and ends. This is the official Marquette website. Unfortunately there's a paywall to access the forums, which is where they post updated and improved protocol (which is mainly for special circumstances--breastfeeding, postpartum, PCOS, etc).

There are also methods that track only cervical fluid (Billings, Creighton, Justisse), which tends to be very low on the cost and labor intensity scale. I successfully used Billings for awhile, but wanted more concrete information to prepare for trying to conceive in the future (1-2 years down the road).

The shipping is $5 if you are not a member. Membership costs $5, so you might as well get a month membership for the same price as shipping. Membership gives you free shipping on all their items. this website has a new sale everyday, and I can say I'm addicted. Definitely a good website near the holidays.

here is the link to the breathalyzer on amazon, check out the reviews

I don't work for them in anyway btw. just a fan of the site

No surprise there! .. The Truth Your Mom / Wife Isn't Telling You! A very very huge number of wives have got pregnant out cheating and a good many of them intentionally so. They just keep quiet and foist the kids off onto their husbands. I'm pregnant, you are you are going to be a daddy. This was a choice / plan to cheat .. Not something to be called a mistake later. Where is the guilt and remorse over the deception? They don't have any, that is how they can deceive their husbands without a care and go on cheating, and go on living a lie. They think it is really funny and spunky of them. They don't want to have children by their (lowly beta) husbands, so they go out and roll with other (alpha) men. TRUST is how they managed to cheat around without having their unsuspecting husbands question them. Now, they want husbands to TRUST them again and not do dna paternity testing on themselves and the kid/kids. (lol) Some wives are threatening to leave their husbands if they do testing. Why? .. They got something to hide! It has nothing to do with trust. It is the last defensive move they have left. Deception and Cheating has ruined marriages, Not dna paternity testing. It isn't a new process, it is simply being streamlined and is becoming more and more common. Science moves ahead not backwards. Soon you'll see electronic devices of all kinds and apps that will allow dads / anyone to do dna testing easily. 20 to 40+ percent of the kids out there don't have the dads they think they do.

The Really BIG Secret .. Wives Have Been Secretly Choosing (secret) Daddies For Their / Her Children And Keeping It Secret From Their Husbands! Now, there is a way to find out if you have been / are a victim of Paternity Deception! .. DNA Paternity Testing. Don't wait until you are to old to have a child of you own with a women with some integrity. She isn't ever going to tell you she cheated on you. She isn't ever going to tell you she cheated on you and the kids are probably not yours. Husbands can ask, but they'll lie to their faces and they are good it. You And The Children Have A Right To Learn The Truth! .. A Right To Know Without Any Doubts!

http://www.angryharry.com/esPaternityFraud.htm

96% of women are liars, honest

www.scotsman.com/news/uk/96-of-women-are-liars-honest-1-565123

( Let a women tell you how it really is ... Who's The Daddy? )
"It’s a wise child, they say, that knows its own father. Nowadays, however, wisdom is hardly required; DNA tests can do the job with scientific certainty. For the entire course of human history, men have nursed profound, troubling doubts about the fundamental question of whether or not they were fathers to their own children; women, by contrast, usually enjoyed a reasonable level of certainty about the matter.

Now, a cotton-wool swab with a bit of saliva, plus a small fee, less than £200, can settle the matter. At a stroke, the one thing that women had going for them has been taken away, the one respect in which they had the last laugh over their husbands and lovers. DNA tests are an anti-feminist appliance of science, a change in the balance of power between the sexes that we’ve hardly come to terms with. And that holds true even though many women have the economic potential to provide for their children themselves."


www.spectator.co.uk/features/6391918/whos-the-daddy

www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6D2UmE7Yd8


www.youtube.com/watch?v=BLB2NRGVUEI

www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfjZNYV8-2E

www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlDTRj2yEj8

www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vN2FeYiIpQ


To Understand ...

www.swabtest.com/faqs.php


DNA Paternity Testing Kit

IDENTIGEN - www.dnatesting.com


STK Paternity Test Kit

www.amazon.com/STK-PT01_A-Paternity-Test-Kit/dp/B005Y34OKA

A cheating session - Almost GUARANTEES A Pregnancy! About 99.5% of the time the wife conceives when cheating. She almost never gets caught, because she plans it well and her husband trust her.


Lies When It Come To Paternity ...

www.avoiceformen.com/allnews/women-50-would-lie-about-paternity-while-42-would-lie-about-being-on-birth-control/


Shame and Scandal - Just scratching the surface

www.angryharry.com/reShameandScandal.htm


How To - Do A DNA Paternity Test.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVd6qv_pfJQ

This is the real point. Yelling about how the state is forcibly collecting blood is good click bait, but the key here is people are choosing to drink and not accepting the responsibility of finding a designated driver.

The best way to protect yourself is purchasing a breathalyzer of their own so they are informed. Mine has saved me several times from a possible DUI. If you know your BAC before being pulled over, you can make the choice of a breathalyzer or blood draw.

Love the info! Thank you. Mainly I meant the product listing.. Haha! Is it this one or this one?

Thanks again for sharing the study!

Clearing up that 1% costs $100 and is super easy.

I have zero reason to suspect my wife is a cheater but my youngest son doesn't look anything like me. I love the boy and nothing, not even finding out he wasn't mine would change that. But the doubt wouldn't go away until I knew for certain. Woke him up gently one night, swabbed his cheeks, gave him a hug and put him back to sleep. He has no idea what I was doing and probably doesn't even remember it.

The results came back within a week. I am now 100% certain that I am the father.

If you have a dollar store nearby (dollar tree, 99 cent store), or can take a look on Amazon, their pregnancy tests are very good, accurate, and low cost. I used them (Dollar Tree tests) for my pregnancy and 6 tests all showed the same result. Many other online resources will cite the same regarding how well the dollar tree tests are.

Example: $7/25 strips if you have prime or know someone with it. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B005E90G4W/ref=cm_sw_r_other_awd_peVDwb2RAQ8W6

I saw on this sub, a recommendation for someone in a similar predicament as you, to check out /r/almosthomeless , perhaps it might help you.

Good luck!

1. Forget about running and cardio. Get the book "Body by Science" and learn how to get great results in a lot less time, and why running and cardio are not good choices.
   
2. I just bought a breath acetone ketone meter. You pay for the meter once and can use it for free thereafter because it does not use urine or blood strips. It is much more accurate than urine sticks. This is the one I bought and am very happy with: https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B07NSVPGNP/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o08_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
   
3. Investigate going ZeroCarb. https://www.reddit.com/r/zerocarb/ It works and makes your life a lot easier.

In my opinion the clearblue fertility monitor is over-priced and uses old bulky technology (it has been around in this form-factor for about 15 years).

There is little need to spend the money on it as they sell another product that does exactly the same thing (tests for LH and Estrogen using identical sticks) that is called the "Clearblue Advanced Digital Ovulation Test".

The only thing that the Clearblue fertility monitor does that the Clearblue Advanced Digital Ovulation Test doesn't is cycle day calendaring and insists on a pre-selected test window - the cheaper Advanced Digital Ovulation Test will show exactly the same status, low fertility, high fertility and peak fertility at exactly the same times.

Don't believe that the Clearblue Easy Fertility Monitor "adapts" to your cycle, it doesn't, it just keeps a note of your cycle length (which you can do with a chart, spreadsheet or fertility friend) - in fact lots of people who are Fertility Monitor pros just start feeding in sticks a couple of days before ovulation and stop after the peak reading.

Compare the prices -

Clearblue Advanced Digital Ovulation Test with 20 sticks included
= $35.98

vs

Clearblue Fertility Monitor - $151.99
+ 30 Sticks $48.76 = $200.75

I have all of these types of units btw, the two types of digital ovulation testers and also the CBFM.

NB: You need to make sure that you get the "Clearblue Advanced Digital Ovulation Test" not the "Clearblue Digital Ovulation Test" as this one only checks for LH (and not Estrogen and LH like the Advanced Digital Ovulation Test does).

You may have seen this already as well, but it has a pretty good amazon rating and reviews. http://www.amazon.com/SneakPeek-Early-Gender-Prediction-Test/product-reviews/B016201HCG/ref=cm_cr_pr_viewopt_srt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1&sortBy=recent&pageNumber=1

Though I ordered through their site and using a code for $20 off I found on their facebook.

Anker is having a handful of their battery packs for a couple bucks off. I got the 10000 mAh one

If you're in the market for a chef's knife, I like KUMA, and they have their intro 8-inch with a $5 coupon to clip and additional code KUMASALE25 for 25% off (not sure if before or after the $5 off, but $15 is still a great deal for a decent knife).

If you're in the market for anything Amazon (Kindle/Echo) branded, that's all on sale too.

Oh, and if you want to do 23andme, the $200 one is half off.

Sounds like you're in for some exciting times!

I stopped taking birth control last October. We anticipated that it would take us awhile to get pregnant (I'm 32), and ended up getting pregnant after only two months. Soooo....be sure that you are just as mentally prepared for it to happen sooner than expected as you are for it to take awhile. I did use [ovulation test strips] (https://www.amazon.com/Easy-Home-Ovulation-Strips-Pregnancy/dp/B00F3IPBPS/ref=sr_1_5_s_it?s=hpc&ie=UTF8&qid=1496164880&sr=1-5&keywords=ovulation%2Btest%2Bstrips&th=1), so maybe that's why we were able to get pregnant so quickly....but it definitely happened sooner than we were expecting it to happen.

I recommend buying a breathalyzer - you can an ok one for as cheap as $40 on Amazon. It's real benefit is that it will help you develop an intuitive association between how physically feel and what your BAC measures.

That 30 day thing doesn't apply to everyone. I can get it to clear my system in a week. I bought some home test kits to check. Lots of variables. Generally, if you want to flush your system, lots of exercise and water will clean it out pretty well. Usage also plays a role. If you are an every day user or all day every day thing and you are overweight, it can take awhile.

Ordered a few things from Amazon Global, multiple Nvidia Shield Tablets, a few phone cases, and a few other gadgets, pretty much everything was delivered without any hitch, and they always seemed to estimate a higher amount of tax than was actually required, although the remaining would be refunded within 2 days of delivery.

There was one instance where I never got the product, obviously I was refunded in full and even amazon didn't get their product back. It was this, a BAC tester, the customs kept it stating that it wasn't allowed in the country, and that if I wanted it I would have to pay them a fine of 30K on top of the price I paid to amazon, I contacted amazon and they told me due to the nature of the laws in India, they had held it and there was nothing that could have been done and refunded me in full.

Tacking these on for anyone watching.
They're just as effective and easy to use as the $15 ones at the store, just without the fancy packaging and housing.
I've even seen them used at doctor's offices and hospitals.

It seems strange at first, but regular testing is an important part of taking care of your own health.
Even if you use birth control.

I've known people where it takes a year after coming back off birth control for their bodies to start self-regulating again. Be patient with yourself.

In regards to the ovulation tests, if you are using these, the test is only positive if the test line is DARKER than the control line. A faint line does not indicate that you are ovulating. Hope that helps.

I have the Geratherm one which is super simple but I actually like it a lot more than the bells-and-whistles one I had. It had a backlight and stuff but it took forever, the measuring end was huge and wasn't that accurate.

You could always spend a little bit of money and throw one in your glove box.

http://www.amazon.com/BACtrack-BT-S75-Pro-S75-Pro-Breathalyzer/dp/B002ZN7XQY/ref=zg_tr_15992781_4

I wouldn't rely on a reading from it in court but if it reads under .06 you are probably pretty safe trusting it in a .08 state. I've been looking to get a new one to trow in the glove box. The one I had in college for funzies broke.

I went back and checked out what qualifies as ketoacidosis and I guess I was mistaken, still though, according to me ketone meter I consistently wake up above the ideal range: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B07NSVPGNP/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o03_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

As far as I know I'm a perfectly functioning, healthy adult...but every morning I wake up around 5 mmol/L.

I learned to track my cycle and now no longer need "other" birth control, except for condoms during my fertile period. I realize that it sounds like the Catholic method and therefore may not be appealing to you under your circumstances, but I find it very freeing and empowering. Also,this little computer helps a TON (and costs between $300 and $400 on ebay.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00LVOU27U/ref=zg_bs_15992781_9?ie=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=E16GA2RW3HTFRJ2TQ960

Accurate for me is getting 0s on that and always being able to be good on my interlock. Definitely could be better ones out there.

You can get very nice, professional quality breathalyzers from Amazon for less than a hundred bucks. Might seem like a lot to spend for something most people don't even own, but how much do you spend on alcohol? Taxis? Fighting DUI charges? Increased insurance? Ignition interlock installation and maintenance fees?

Totally worth having your own, high quality (non-trinket) breathalyzer if you enjoy drinking and also own/drive cars.

Edit: I bought one of these on a lark and discovered that sometimes you really ARE* impaired the next day, even if you only feel slightly groggy. It really made me rethink things and I'm really glad I did so before any bad consequence.

First, refuse to sign the birth certificate at the hospital. Nurses and administrators will bark, jump through hoops, and raise hell making you feel like you need to sign it. You don't. Second, demand a paternity test. It doesn't need to be a court ordered one, it can be an over the counter test or even one sold off of Amazon. They aren't admissible in court, but if that test shows you're not the father, you should demand a legally binding paternity test.

>I must remain in the area because she has to stay near her family

False. You need to support a child that is actually yours. You don't need to throw your professional life away because she wants to live in the middle of nowhere.

>If I were to get a PhD shoveling 20k/year her way for many years is worth the opportunity.

You're going to be blind sided by what child support is actually going to ding ou for.

Is this a good one? It's reusable an infinite amount of times and just requires a urine sample? Is it very easy to use and understand? I would be so excited if I didn't have to take pills anymore.

I can monitor things regularly if it's simple for me to understand. Or if someone can help me understand

NIPT is your best bet. It screens for trisomies and gender if you want. However, this sounds weird, but there is a decent gender test you can order through Amazon. Apparently it's fairly accurate, especially the further you are past 10 weeks. SneakPeek - Early Gender Prediction DNA Test https://www.amazon.com/dp/B016201HCG/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_rvDkybJDS3RMW
Supposedly you get your money back if it's wrong. NIPT of course is best but this is a decent Plan B.

Like /u/hockeywife, I can't advise on your specific situation, but I can tell you about me!

We're planning to start TTC in April too, so I came off the pill at the end of my January pack. I immediately started temping and I'm in the middle of my second cycle.

Personally, I am so glad I did it this way! I've been able to get into the habit of temping while it "doesn't matter" and I'll have a much better idea of timing when we do start.

I highly recommend reading Taking Charge of Your Fertility {link}, buying a BBT thermometer (I use the Mabis {link} one) and using FertilityFriend {link} to track your temperature and CM.

As I'm 34 years old and a bit of a crazy organiser, I also bought The Impatient Woman's Guide to Getting Pregnant {link} and a Clearblue Fertility Monitor {link}. I thought using the monitor now would be overkill (and a waste of money - the sticks are expensive!), but again, I'm glad I started now. The first month is well-known for showing a "high" reading for a long time, as the monitor is figuring out what's normal for the user. I'm so glad that I'll have it all "warmed up" by the time that I really need to know what's happening.

And I second /u/hockeywife's comment about sex drive - it is MUCH more difficult to keep sex protected when you're off hormonal birth control. My troll body is like "well, what harm can it do?" every day in my fertile period :D

I've been using pregmate and the reviews say they work well. I haven't gotten a positive yet but I suspect it was due to mistimed tests on my part. One a day is not enough.

I use Fertility Friend to track everything. They have a section where you can upload pictures and compare them to see if the lines are getting darker or not. Ime, Fertility Friend will not give you cross hairs to indicate ovulation unless you're temping. I dont temp because my sleep pattern is highly irregular, so I just us fertility friend as a place to input all my symptoms so I can try to notice patterns on my own.

Yep. This is excellent advice. I've even been told that the dollar store variety are some of the most reliable around. (Although my quick search of google didn't yield any articles to back that claim, but I'm kind of lazy)

You can order a whole case of them from their website if you don't feel like going to the store.

I've also found that the same tests are 88 cents at WalMart. So you can save 22 cents on your pee tests.

OR for real bargain hunters, you can order a box of just the test strips from Amazon for the low, low price of 22 cents a test.

Or, you can try the lady-comp, for just shy of $500:

> A computer programmed with data from 700,000 cycles, the Lady-Comp sensor captures Basal Body Temperature and then analyzes, learns, and predicts the users cycle with a 99.3% accuracy rate.

Haven't tried it myself, but friends have recommended it.

Amazon... Pretty accurate. I got a DWI when I was 21, nine years ago and promised myself I would never again.

Link to keychain: amazon

I know it's decently accurate because before that I had a $150 one that was not a keychain that I kept in my car.

I would say anything under $75 I wouldn't even bother with. I got a cheap one for around $60, and it works somewhat...but really if you're going to spend the money go ahead and get something decent. A couple of my friends have breathalyzers have the ones below:
http://www.amazon.com/BACtrack-BT-S75-Pro-S75-Pro-Breathalyzer/dp/B002ZN7XQY/ref=sr_1_1?s=hpc&ie=UTF8&qid=1342023010&sr=1-1&keywords=breathalyzer

http://www.amazon.com/AlcoMate-AL7000-Premium-Breathalyzer/dp/B00113TPMO/ref=sr_1_36?ie=UTF8&qid=1342022841&sr=8-36&keywords=breathalyzer

Both of them seem to work well. Always keep in mind that if you test right after you have a drink, you're not going to get an accurate reading, and really you still have to use common sense. Although the legal limit is .08 here, I'd say you're really risking it if you drive on .05 or higher. I don't normally bring mine out with me because I don't drink enough to ever have to worry in the first place, but it's still a neat little toy.

Edit: by the way the more you use them, the less accurate they get over time, and you'll eventually have to have it recalibrated. I think the first one I linked to says you can use it about 1,000 times before it needs recalibration.

Look into getting a lady-comp. I got sick of taking hormonal birth control and have switched to the rythem method and haven't looked back. They are pricey machines but they last ten years. Best decision I ever made.

https://www.amazon.com/Parameter-Urinalysis-Infection-Diabetes-Gallbladder/dp/B00XIKQCJC

I wanted strips that had ketones and specific gravity and these where the best deal I could find. I'm relatively healthy for a fat dirty pig so 99% of the time all the indicators are negative, but it's informative and fun keeping tabs.

alcohawk! My personal best is 0.31 before black zoning it. I probably drank more after that.

I use FAM and just track my fertility. It's great because there are no unwanted side effects and once you get used it to its really easy. Here's a link to what you can use to track your fertility. Just another idea! https://www.amazon.com/Clearblue-Easy-Fertility-Monitor-Packaging/dp/B0000532QB

And stop drug testing for pre-employment too! My Easy@Home test kit says I'm clean, but I'm not taking chances. I'm doing a detox cycle and my pee is bright neon yellow right now.

http://www.amazon.com/babi-Urine-Pregnancy-Strips-25-count/dp/B005E90G4W

If you get something like this, it will just be like a strip of paper, not the whole plastic bit you pee on, so you'd pee into a small cup and dip the paper in. These work out to about 20 cents each, so definitely affordable.

Half off the super deluxe 23&Me DNA thingy

I’m so so so tempted

I get easy@home bulk pregnancy tests off amazon.ca! They are pretty cheap and it's prime eligible.

60 for the price of 2!

Are you saying you can't find the on-sale version from the US Amazon? I managed to find it. Link below if that's what you meant and you were interested.

https://www.amazon.com/23andMe-DNA-Test-Ancestry-collection/dp/B01G7PYQTM/ref=gbps_tit_m-6_3b69_6d1df4e2?smid=A1KWJVS57NX03I&pf_rd_p=db08f08d-45f1-490b-aa6c-1f4d543b3b69&pf_rd_s=merchandised-search-6&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_i=14611812011&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=026YCQB796D7ZWAPSA8V

I get these OPKs: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01G5WGNVQ and these pregnancy tests: https://www.amazon.com/ClinicalGuard®-Pregnancy-Test-Strips-Individually-Sealed/dp/B007VT3BUE
The pregnancy tests are a little more expensive for the 50 pack right now, but the prices vary. It looks like the 100 pack is less than 0.20/test!

Don’t smoke, drink water throughout day over next few weeks. You should be fine in two weeks. I use these to test myself. I’m 5’9” 160 and smoke an ounce a month and I’m clean in 17-20 days normally.

10 Pack - Easy@Home Marijuana (THC) Single Panel Drug Tests Kit - Individually Wrapped Single Panel THC Screen Urine Drug Test Kit with 50 ng/ml Cutoff Level - EDTH-114 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00E5O5EV2/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_WLIqDbATVAWNB

Looks like it’s actually on sale on amazon right now! https://www.amazon.com/SneakPeek-Early-Gender-Prediction-Test/dp/B016201HCG

It surprised me how cheap one can buy a breathalyzer.

If she is willing to use it, that could solve the question of if she is legal to drive or not.

http://www.amazon.com/BACtrack-BT-S75-Pro-S75-Pro-Breathalyzer/dp/B002ZN7XQY/ref=pd_sim_sbs_hpc_2


$100 for a breathalyzer, or $10,000 for a DUI. It's up to her.

http://money.msn.com/auto-insurance/dui-the-10000-dollar-ride-home

REMEMBER KIDS: Paternity tests are now $100 kits, lab fees included. You take a cheek swab from the presumed father and the kid and mail it in, and check it online. There is no bill, the woman does not need to be tested, and there is no reason that the woman even needs to know.

TEST EVERY KID, EVERY TIME. The rate of children being born into families with a different father is higher than you would even think possible. The "father" rarely suspects anything, and the woman almost never tells. The truth is hard to face, but it feels really good knowing it.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/BACtrack-Smartphone-Breathalyser-Compatible-Samsung-white/dp/B00CFN1HNY this one has sharing features. You could make her show you her results before you talk to her.

"Are you sober?"

"......yes"

"Prove it."

I would think you could get clean in 30 days, maybe in 3 weeks. Water will help flush your system, essentially by making you pee a lot. I bought this pack of strips,

Easy@Home Marijuana (thc) Single Panel Drug Tests Kit - Individually Wrapped Single Panel THC Screen Urine Drug Test Kit - 10 Tests https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00E5O5EV2/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_tai_siIZBbBBP45FS

I believe those are legit enough. Depending on the urinalysis they order, it could measure a lower threshold, but I doubt you would get anything other than the standard urinalysis, so those should be good enough to test.

Intact male dogs are always "in heat"! But regarding the urine stench, I would capture a morning sample to take to the vet. ASAP.

ETA: Just saw your response to the other poster. I would still capture a morning sample and if you feel that you are not being listened to, I would find a second opinion. I, for one, have used these because I have an intact female. Just to ensure that when she's through her heat, I am not going to miss an infection or something like that (even with no signs whatsoever).

What about a diaphragm-cervical cap? I don't know much about them besides I think you have to get them specially fitted... might have to use them in conjunction with spermicide though; not sure.

I've also heard of fertility tracking devices on this sub (like the ladycomp--seems kind of expensive though and would also take a fair amount of self control/responsibility.

Otherwise, good on you for taking a stand against unprotected sex!

You mentioned that you last smoked around late August... how often would you smoke before that? Like every day or just on occasions? I used to smoke everyday & decided to quit to apply for a federal job & it took me 2 1/2 months to flush out all of the THC. I bought a 10 pack of at home drug tests from amazon so that I can test myself every week or 2. If you smoked a lot, you might still test dirty. these are the tests I bought on amazon

Er, actually, they are cheap if you get them in bulk. (50-pack, 60.)

And yes, there's very little difference; they're FDA-regulated. The main thing is that some are a little bit more sensitive, which can give you a few more days warning, but also more false alarms.

You can also get combo packs of ovulation and pregnancy detection, but some people think that takes some of the fun out of it.

Could be proteinuria. You can buy test strips on amazon that test for protein in the urine, but it's probably worth seeing a doctor about if it's happening consistently.

It was this one if anyone is curious:

https://www.amazon.ca/gp/aw/d/B00CFN1HNY?ref=ppx_pt2_mob_b_prod_image

The BACtrack Mobile Pro is a Bluetooth connected breathalyzer. It allows you to share your results directly to social media.

There is a way to track irregular cycles. As a disclaimer, I've never done it, but many couples do it when they're trying to conceive, but there are couples that do it when they're trying not to get pregnant and they either use condoms or don't have sex during fertile times.

The more involved ways are that you need to do a few things.

1. Take your basal body temp daily, every morning at the same time. When your temp rises, it means you're ovulating.
   
   
2. Check the position of your cervix daily. Soft and low means ovulating.
   
   
3. Check your cervical mucus daily. Thick means not ovulating, thin means fertile.
   
   Many women recommend the book/website Taking Charge of your Fertility. Since the Copper IUD doesn't affect your cycle, you can track this while it's in place if you choose this route. While you begin to get the hang of it, use condoms.
   
   There's also a device that's around $500 called a LadyComp that has an alarm and a thermometer that will do the temp logging for you, and it will have green (non-fertile), yellow (danger zone) and red (use condoms FOR SURE) days. They're usually used for couples who want kids, but again, you can use it if you are scared of spending $800 on an IUD that may expel again.
   
   As far as Apps- I've heard of and used Eve by Glow and it allows you to track symptoms, if you've had sex (with or without a condom), and your discharge, but it doesn't really have support for logging your basal body temp, and I've heard some women say that the ovulation dates that the app predicts are off.
   
   It looks like Bedsider has a really good breakdown on how to combine apps with other tracking to optimize protection.

There is no need for trust anymore. Paternity test kits are $100. Every self-respecting man should be testing every one of his children, just in case (unless you happen to live in France, which is so literally cucked that it made paternity testing illegal). If your wife objects, that's your test result right there.

Not sure if links are allowed here, but these urine analysis strips came in very handy when I had my kidney stone. 10 Parameter Urinalysis Test Strips 150ct on Amazon.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00XIKQCJC?ref=yo_pop_ma_swf

1. The Army sends your urine to a lab that uses the Olympus AU-800 Automated Chemistry Analyzer for analysis.
   
   
2. A few days before drill find a local commercial lab that uses that same instrument and pay to have your own urine tested confidentially. Generally, there are a lot of labs like that around.
   
   
3. If you don't pass your own private test don't go to drill. If you do pass, go to drill with knowledge that you are safe.
   
   
4. Conversly, I've heard the national guard uses 50 ng/ml sensitivity test strips to detect drugs in your urine. They do it right there on base, and only send in the samples that fail. If this is the cases, then you should buy your own kit (such as this) and test yourself before you decide whether you want to go to drill.

No one can really answer that for you, everyone is different. Try using [these] (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00E5O5EV2/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_tai_ao.MybN5TBXW2) to get an idea if you're clean or not. Took me a month last time I was applying for jobs.

DNA test is the only solution to find out if it is yours. That or you just assume the role of dad without ever knowing. Not sure if they have them there but cvs has these http://m.cvs.com/mt/www.cvs.com/shop/product-detail/IDENTIGENE-DNA-Paternity-Test?skuId=420841 as well as rite aid, walgreens, amazon. 30 bucks plus 130 lab fee or here is a cheaper one on amazon http://www.amazon.com/STKs-Paternity-Test-Kit-INCLUDES/dp/B005Y34OKA

Get one asap you can even test the kid while she's asleep, in the bathroom, if she will flip her shit. Results in days.

Get one of these. They're cheap and they'll break if you use it as a toy. I don't know how well they'll hold up if left out in the cold, but it's amazing.

Mine broke after being dropped, but I'll probably get another soon.

It's not super accurate. You should drink some water and wait 10 minutes. It's enough to give you an indication.

I use these: 10 Pack - Easy@Home Marijuana (THC) Single Panel Drug Tests Kit - Individually Wrapped Single Panel THC Screen Urine Drug Test Kit with 50 ng/ml Cutoff Level - EDTH-114 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00E5O5EV2/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_qwKlDbA9QF1YS

BACtrack Mobile Smartphone Breathalyzer for iPhone and Android Devices

https://www.amazon.com/BACtrack-Smartphone-Breathalyzer-Android-Devices/dp/B00CFN1HNY

http://gizmodo.com/textalyzer-wants-to-be-a-breathalyzer-for-your-cellphon-1770426643

http://gizmodo.com/textalyzer-wants-to-be-a-breathalyzer-for-your-cellphon-1770426643

Done.

You can also buy http://www.amazon.com/babi-Urine-Pregnancy-Strips-25-count/dp/B005E90G4W/ref=sr_1_10?ie=UTF8&qid=1394183743&sr=8-10&keywords=pregnancy+test

So cheap!

This one https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0000532QB/ref=cm_sw_r_wa_apa_t3M7xb9A1JKMM and this one https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00R1V66SG/ref=cm_sw_r_wa_apa_E4M7xb44TE1GS

23andme genetic testing is half off!

https://www.amazon.com/23andMe-DNA-Test-Ancestry-Personal/dp/B01G7PYQTM/

[It's back!] (https://www.amazon.com/23andMe-DNA-Test-Ancestry-Personal/dp/B01G7PYQTM/ref=gbph_img_m-3_c825_893cc1ea?smid=A1KWJVS57NX03I&pf_rd_p=6823903e-c532-41c8-b6ec-0e08ec2fc825&pf_rd_s=merchandised-search-3&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_i=13887280011&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=GEK8E05K2BKXCKM1SCBG)

also randomly just saw this - amazon prime day doing the 23andme genetic test for $99 - i think it went up to $200 or $235 a few years ago so that's a good price for it https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01G7PYQTM/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdo_t2_msezzb7B4W6D3

I saw some at a few dollars stores. They actually work.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00E5O5EV2/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_uwnNyb30Y3YZP

I say buy these now. Tey once a day. See how they react the closer to the date OP gets.

Black Friday sale is live:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01G7PYQTM

It's back on!

https://www.amazon.com/23andMe-DNA-Test-Ancestry-Personal/dp/B01G7PYQTM/ref=gbps_img_m-6_f45d_f2f081fe?smid=A1KWJVS57NX03I&pf_rd_p=c624455a-ed52-4f78-9f81-675ed6faf45d&pf_rd_s=merchandised-search-6&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_i=13887280011&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=SXK8T1XRYV6NMSCV4M14

http://www.amazon.com/STKs-Paternity-Test-Kit-INCLUDES/dp/B005Y34OKA/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1375324178&sr=8-1&keywords=paternity+test

$99.99 to your door.

https://www.amazon.ca/BACtrack-Smartphone-Breathalyzer-Android-Devices/dp/B00CFN1HNY.

Keep a Breathalyzer handy for those random couplings!

http://www.amazon.com/BACtrack-Element-Professional-Breathalyzer-Technology/dp/B004U48FEK/ref=sr_1_13/185-0049892-7751118?ie=UTF8&qid=1381596290&sr=8-13&keywords=personal+breathalyzer

UTI Dip Stick

http://www.amazon.com/Alcohawk-Digital-Alcohol-Breath-Tester/dp/B000FJEQYM/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=hpc&qid=1267597259&sr=8-1

and

http://www.amazon.com/Alcohawk-Precision-Digital-Alcohol-Breath/dp/B000BN32M4/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=hpc&qid=1267597259&sr=8-2

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B005E90G4W
That link is the very same product I ordered.

Did she say why? I'd DNA test that kids ASAP.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B005Y34OKA?pc_redir=1406880881&robot_redir=1

I got this one https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00E5O5EV2?psc=1&ref=yo_pop_mb_yo_pop_mb_pd_t2

Not the same as OP, but:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00E5O5EV2/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

They have them in smaller packs, but I got these: https://smile.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B01G5YAKHC/ref=mp_s_a_1_3_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1527598063&sr=8-3&keywords=pregnancy+test+100&dpPl=1&dpID=61Ux%2B4PNm5L&ref=plSrch

NTA You don’t even have to ask her. Just do one, get the results and go from there.

If you ask her and the kid IS yours then you just stirred up a mess of drama over nothing.

If you send it off without mentioning it to her and the results come back that’s he’s NOT yours, then it doesn’t matter if she freaks out, you’ve got hard evidence.

https://www.amazon.com/STK-Paternity-Test-Kit-Fees/dp/B005Y34OKA

$100 isn’t a lot to pay for your peace of mind.

10 Parameter Urinalysis Test Strips 150ct, Urinary Tract Infection Strips (UTI) Urine Test Strips Test Glucose, Ketone, pH, Protein, And More, for Those With Diabetes, Gallbladder, and Kidney Problems https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00XIKQCJC/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_mBvNBbXJZDQ6A

Does this look comparable to what you have in UK? It looks like they both test for the same 10 things.

I just got a new job offer that will likely require me to take a drug test, so I decided to quit smoking. I passed a home urine test after only 6 days, even though I am heavy user. I'm pretty thin (6'2", 165 lbs), but I dab multiple times a day every day and don't exercise at all, so I don't understand how this is possible. I've always heard it usually takes 21-30 days to clear for everyday smokers, so I'm happy, yet confused. I'm fairly certain the test works correctly since I failed the same test 2 days after quitting. Anyone have similar stories? I will re-test tomorrow, but wanted to see what y'all think of this.

Home Test Used:
https://www.amazon.com/Easy-Marijuana-Single-Panel-Tests/dp/B00E5O5EV2/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_product_sims?ie=UTF8

Very shitty, not accurate to a degree. I got this one I've had it before, but the cops took it from me.

These Pregnancy Tests are going to be totally useless in my case. After 3.5 years of trying I doubt i'll just suddenly become pregnant. Anyway sometimes my cycle runs long and I get to anxiously stare at a test anyway.

Lorises rock. I kinda love slow lorises.

On Amazon! So much cheaper than the drugstore ones and I can ease my irrational fear of pregnancy forever. Highly suggest.

A few suggestions for you:

1. Stop consuming THC
   
2. Buy a THC drug test, I got 10 of them off amazon for cheap, if in a hurry just buy it from walmart/drug store:
   
   https://www.amazon.com/Easy-Home-Marijuana-Single-Panel/dp/B00E5O5EV2/ref=sr_1_7?keywords=thc+test&qid=1565483019&s=gateway&sr=8-7
   
   

3. Make sure to consume lots of fluids, I hear exercising helps as well
   
   
4. On the day of your exam consume extra fluids to dilute your urine, you can research this point more but from what I understand you are unlikely to fail for dilute urine (unless it has very low color). Actually might want to make sure you are taking your multi vitamins to get some color in your urine
   
   
5. Be skeptical of whacky advise from people who dont know what they are talking about, be skeptical of products that say they will clean you out

Read the description:

> Additional $129 lab fee required

That $26.88 thing is basically worthless. It is a scam.

Amazon has one with included lab fees for $100:

http://www.amazon.com/STK-PT01_A-Paternity-Test-Kit/dp/B005Y34OKA/

However if they were performing a lot more of them (per the OP's suggestion) the economies of scale might bring down the cost from $100. I think it is more the "mandatory" part which would be controversial.