Reddit mentions of Art of Seduction

Why do you want to be more social? What do you want in life? Specifically. Write down the reasons, and write down everything you want for yourself - all the things you'd like to own, all the skills you'd like to have, all the people you'd like to meet, all the characteristics you wish you embodied.

Done? No, because you're an asshole. Go back and write them down. Seriously. I spent a fucking long time writing this post for you - I explain my point in several different ways, from different angles, because it's fucking important to me that you get the help you seek - you can take four minutes to write down some reasons. Open up your text editor and get to work, reddit will still be here when you get back. Don't get distracted. Do not trust your memory - write them down.

Okay. Look at those reasons. It's a list of things you want to be, do, and have. Ask yourself: Do you have the freedom to become, achieve and obtain those things, through your actions?

You were afraid to write some things. Maybe you thought "fuck a thousand people" was unrealistic. "Become emperor of my own country". "Go to space," "Own a castle," "Fly with the Blue Angels," "Be a real life James Bond," "Write a novel," "Be able to talk to anyone," "Start a religion," "Meet Daniel Craig." You're wrong, go back and write your "unrealistic" things down too. People have done them, you are physically capable of doing them. But are you free to do them?

Right now, you've decided to believe the answer is "no". If it were "yes", you wouldn't have posted, you would have just gone out and done them. Let's change that "no" to a "yes".

• Take this test. Write down your score somewhere you won't lose it.
  
  If this problem is the one you truly want to solve, you must focus your attention on it and let nothing distract you. All things which might get in the way of you solving your anxiety and inferiority problems must be ignored, including some of your own beliefs, and including some things like Netflix and Reddit you would rather be doing because they're comfortable and easy. This will be hard work. You will feel incredible after it is done, and it will be done soon if you work hard. Do not waste time. Only through discipline can you achieve freedom - if you are spending time looking at cat videos, understand that you are removing the freedom to spend that time elsewhere. You will not get that time back. It is forever chained to cat videos.
  
  
• Read this book. Pay particularly close attention to section IV.
  
• Take the test again. Compare scores.
  
  You must not fear. There is nothing on the other side of fear except failure. Failure of inaction is much, much worse than failure through action: you learn nothing when you do nothing. Make every attempt to socialize in every situation, even if it hurts, and even though you will fail many times. Experiment until you figure out, trust that you will figure it out.
  
  Optimism will not help you, neither will pessimism - if you believe things will work out okay no matter what, or that things will go to shit no matter what, you have resigned yourself to the whims of a random God and decided not to act. Only activism will help you - the belief that your actions will affect positive change on the outcome. This is true for all things you want in life, including "how do I make friends", "how do I start a business", "how do I become President", "how do I get a job," "how do I get an A in this class," and so on. Strengthen your belief that your success relies entirely on your actions. Strengthen your belief that you have the ability to make good decisions in the future. Strengthen your belief that the worst that could happen is something you can handle. Do not fear boredom, isolation or embarrassment if they are in service of your growth as a human being.
  
  
• Read this book. If it makes you feel shitty about yourself, that means I'm right and you need to read it all the way to the end, you will feel better later. Trust me and make the small sacrifice.
  
• Take the test again. Compare scores.
  
  Seneca recommended taking brief periods of time to deliberately live in rags and eat very little, to steel oneself against the fear of poverty. In our modern era we have developed many new fears, all of which can be eradicated in similar fashion. Fear of boredom. Fear of isolation. Fear of missing out. Fear of hunger, fear of gaining weight, fear of being unattractive, fear of looking dumb, inexperienced, uncool, fear of not being happy enough, not having enough interesting Facebook posts, and on and on. If you have these fears, face them. Physically write them down, then write down ways to mitigate or prevent them, and ways you could recover from them if they come to pass. Realize that these fears are controlling you and limiting your freedom.
  
  Then it comes time to face these fears. Go out and talk to people. Find people that know things you want to know, ask them questions. Find people that do things you want to do, admit your inexperience, and ask for their help. Offer them something in return, and get creative - "I'll <help you with your math homework / trade you a bag of chips / get you that girl's phone number / level up your WoW character> if you show me how you <do this problem / throw a perfect spiral / make those cookies>". Do this with as many people as you can find, do not worry about making friends with each one, do not worry if they make fun of you, do not worry if they hate you - the goal is quantity. Learn from your mistakes, learn from your successes. Every time you fail to take the action - going to a meetup, going to a party, talking to a stranger, joining a group activity - you are restricting your own freedom.
  
  Understand: you are on your own. You can build yourself to do and be anything you want, it is up to the rest of the world to try and stop you, and they will fail because they are uncoordinated and lack self-awareness. The more you realize this, the freer you become.
  
  Further reading:
  
  
• Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. It's a classic for a reason. Do not mentally add "effective in business" to the title, it applies to all situations.
  
• The Art of Seduction. It's not just about seducing women. Making friends, marketing products, attracting investors - these all share common skills which can and must be learned.
  
• The Obstacle Is The Way. Because this is /r/stoicism, after all.
  
• The 4-Hour Body. Learn about self-experimentation and planning ahead for failure. Develop self-awareness. Lose weight if necessary, build muscle if desired.

Read the 48 laws of power and the Art of seduction

Long term take Harry's Advice about lying, but never make you motivations clear, and rember the rule of never doing anything for only one reason.

I'd get him the book The Art of Seduction and a 12 pack of condoms, because he's going to be knee deep in European ass.

But take 6 of the condoms out and put in a note letting him know that those are for you.

Ceasar is mentioned in the preface of Art of Seduction also. It took a certain female archetype that Cleopatra utilised to get him to swoon, she'd show enough interest/attention to get him hooked with her beauty and extravagance, then she'd go cold on him and make him believe it was his fault she changed. She did this to all the alpha males she pursued, a real head fuck.

Energy, chattiness, and catch/release.

E.g., this girl asked me a random question which was pretty interesting, then gave her opinion on it. I want to stress the second part... she didn't just patiently listen to me (I get tired of my own voice), and while she didn't disagree or argue, she threw out a pretty profound opinion and asked me about it. All of this with energy - faster-paced than a normal conversation - and a smile.

After we chatted for a bit she disappeared to do who-knows-what, and then came back. I felt that although she approached me, she was only talking to me because she wanted to - and she could just as easily have not come back.

Turns out she was a bit of a Siren... I ended up nicknaming her Belladonna for two reasons.. means beautiful lady and it's a poisonous plant. That aspect kept me around, though, despite temptations. If she had had slightly more control of the poison I'd have stayed.

PS: For women's mindsets in seduction... Normally I don't recommend it, but Robert Greene's Art of Seduction has a chapter on the Siren. I have to say, of the many (many...) girls in my life, the ones who still stand out were sirens.

Charme and Charisma are closely tied together but there still are a few differences, though so minor that we are going to ignore them for the sake of this post.

Charme is important to charm your opposite, be it male or female, into agreeing with you. One could say that charme makes people say yes. Even if you didn't ask a question.

There are a few things that play together:

• Your attractiveness level, including grooming, smell, clothing.
  
  
• Your power & status, but also knowledge and expertise fall under this category.
  
  
• Authority & calmness
  
  
• Your body language & confidence.
  
  
• Your humour.
  
  
• Empathy & your presence in the here and now. Ergo listening without becoming distracted.
  
  
• Your agreeability and likableness.
  
  There is no denying that a powerful person always has more charme than his inferiors. There have been studies where actors assumed the same body language and were equally attractive, were paired up against a powerful person. The effects of charme and humour were measured and it turned out that the powerful person scored much better.
  
  Now how can you learn to be more charming? My book recommendations that cover every important aspect would be:
  
  
• The Art of Seduction
  
  
• How to Win Friends & Influence People
  
  
• The Definite Book of Body Language
  
  
• The Charisma Myth
  
  This covers everything except for humour but I fear I can not help you with that. In my opinion, you either have humour, or you don't but many people claim that humour is a learnable skill. Anyway, it was never of interest to me but I am sure that you will find some sources teaching the art of humour.

You should follow the works of people like Arden Leigh, besides that, read "the art of seduction" and "introducing nlp"

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Some links:

https://www.amazon.com/New-Rules-Attraction-Keep-Make/dp/1402266529/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1537026777&sr=8-1&keywords=arden+leigh

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https://www.amazon.com/Art-Seduction-Robert-Greene/dp/1861977697/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1537026836&sr=1-1&keywords=the+art+of+seduction+greene

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https://www.amazon.com/Introducing-NLP-Psychological-Understanding-Influencing/dp/B00Y2VQU2A/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1537026868&sr=1-1&keywords=introducing+nlp+connor

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https://www.amazon.com/Ho-Tactics-Spending-Spoiling-Sponsoring/dp/B07B6V93TT/ref=sr_1_sc_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1537027927&sr=8-1-spell&keywords=how+to+mindguck+a+man+into+spending%2C+spoiling+sponsoring

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etc...

Art of Seduction

He can't stop playing girls for even a second!

this might help bro http://www.amazon.com/Art-Seduction-Robert-Greene/dp/1861977697/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1452196614&sr=1-1&keywords=law+of+seduction

[This] (http://www.amazon.com/The-Art-Seduction-Robert-Greene/dp/1861977697) book is my bible. Can you guess who I am?

You may find this book helpful in learning how to be sexy.

As far as weight loss if concerned. It's a good thing to do for your health, focus on that aspect of it. Don't worry about how your weight makes you look, there are far more things that impact your sexiness. Just keep telling yourself that every bit of success helps build a healthier you. If you back slide, that's perfectly ok because you can always take another step toward a healthier you.

Lot's of people will have very specific advice on how to loose weight. In my experience the simplest method works the best.

1. Decide on a weight loss goal you want to achieve.
   
2. Research how many total calories you would need to consumer per day (calories in - calories burned = total) to achieve that in a healthy manner. (remember weight is not that important for sexiness, so there's no rush. Only the determination to work toward a healthier you.)
   
3. Pick an method of getting exercise that you'll enjoy. (basically any movement is a step toward a healthier you. The only wrong method is no method.)
   
4. (MOST IMPORTANT STEP) Develop a method for tracking your calories. There's tons of really good smart phone apps that make this so easy there's no reason not to do it. This will help you be mindful of what you're eating and how you are exercising. Mindfulness is the key to loosing weight. Don't cheat your numbers. The point is to be aware of what you're doing not to achieve some arbitrary number.
   
5. Every night review what you did during the day. Give yourself credit for tracking your habits. If you hit your calorie goal then great. If not, think about a small change that can help you hit your goal. Did you get some exercise today? If so, good for you! If not, no problem! Everyday is a fresh chance to take a step toward a healthier you.
   
6. In the morning, thank yourself for all the work you did to make yourself that much healthier, then think about one small step you can take today toward a healthier you and focus on how good it will feel to take that step.
   
7. Rinse, repeat until you hit a milestone. I would not recommend weighing or measuring yourself more than once a week. There's so much fluctuation that happens with your body that you could see a lot of ups and downs and it will put your focus on the wrong things. Your weight is not really what's important. What's important is that you're not committed to being healthier and happier.
   
8. If you can follow these steps. I guarantee you'll hit some happy milestones. Reward yourself when you do, but do it a healthy way.
   
   Have fun, be healthy and be safe. It's all good.
   

By far the best is Robert Greene's "The Art of Seduction."

You will absolutely love it if you enjoy reading about history - it's not a book about nailing girls at strip clubs, it's an analysis of personalities and romantic tactics throughout history. I enjoy all of Greene's books, he's authoritative on every topic he takes on.

I've also read "The Game" and "How To Win Friends & Influence People". The latter is a mandatory read, if you're just trying to figure out how to interact with people in a more positive way - of course the advise in that book is applicable to both genders and is good life lessons. The Game was interesting, and lessons from that book inspired a huge following, but it's sort of vapid in the end - it's just a way to get laid, you won't find a good relationship.

This books tie in those two side nicely and a few more. You should grab a copy.

Man, I wish I were more impulsive, creative, witty, and funny/goofy.

The Art of Seduction: I haven't read it (except the intro).
http://www.amazon.com/Art-Seduction-Robert-Greene/dp/1861977697

What the intro says is there many types of personalities and seductive personalities. So if you're goofy, make it work for you. Don't try to be the Ryan Gosling (who by the way I've heard does not have nearly the charming personality that you may have, but yes if I were of a certain persuasion I would totally bang him based on his looks.). Be goofy and charming.

Secondly, girls aren't fawning over Ryan Gosling's and Channing Tatum's personalities. They're fawning over their looks. Now unless you have the right genetics and epigenetics, you're not going to look like them. But you can look the best you can look. Get a nice haircut, and start dressing nicer. Hit the gym and get the Gosling/Tatum muscles.

As for things you enjoy, keep enjoying them. I think you can separate your worlds pretty well.

I hear you, buddy. I know it can seem hopeless sometimes, but there just might be some things you haven't tried yet.

Being "a nice guy" is cool, but by itself, it's not enough to be attractive.

There are common behavioral traits that often pique curiosity & interest naturally among people. Learn more about the concepts that fuel attraction, and develop your own personal attractive qualities (beyond & in addition to just being "a nice guy").

You don't have to change your core values, and you don't have to be rich, or a chiseled model, or "a pick-up artist," or "a player," or a misogynist. You just need to learn how to behave (genuinely) in ways that naturally make people more attracted to you.

A lot of "nice guys" complain that they always hear women say "I wish I could just find a nice guy" while those same women seem to date nothing but jerks. The "jerks" that some women date simply display other attractive traits that most "nice guys" don't - things like confidence, sense of humor, fun, mystery, emotional independence, masculinity, etc. (...and unfortunately, those "jerks" can also be selfish, dishonest, unfaithful, abusive, etc.)

Being a nice guy gets you a "hello" and a handshake.
Being attractive gets you a date.
Being an attractive nice guy gets you a whole lot more.

If you haven't already read them, you might find some useful info in books like:
"The Art of Seduction" by Robert Greene
"Love Tactics" by Thomas W. McKnight & Robert H. Phillips
"How to Make Anyone Fall in Love with You" by Leil Lowndes

...And avoid online dating websites/apps - I could endlessly list reasons why, but that would be a whole separate topic.

Best of luck.

I suppose a knowledge of seductive process and seductive characters would aid greatly here. Currently reading this myself for the same reason.