Reddit mentions of Fred Jones Tools for Teaching

I have so much empathy for you because I have definitely been where you are. This is my sixth year teaching middle school, and it gets better. My first year was rough (I remember one student asking me, "Why don't you act like a real teacher?"). So, please don't get discouraged!

I think a lot of the advice you've been given is spot on. I really liked Fred Jones Tools for Teaching. It gives really clear, practical advice for setting the tone and structuring your class.

You'll take some time to settle into a tone and a style that works for you. I remember during my first year, I felt that I had to be really authoritative. I wore my hair in a bun, wore heels so I'd be taller than the student, and I tried to be rigid and not show too much of my personality. Huge mistake! Now I'm much more myself and I allow my students to know a little more about me (I talk about my cat, my travels, etc.). They like me (well most of them do!), and they want to impress me and don't want to disappoint me. Part of that came with them seeing me as a real person.

I also learn as much about them as possible. I love Google Forms. If you haven't done it already, a getting to know you type survey is great for starting to build that relationship and trust. Here's the one I gave this year. It's nice because then I can reference things from their survey when I'm talking with them one on one (e.g. "You like the Pacers? I don't know ... I'm more of a college basketball fan myself.") It means a LOT to kids that you care about getting to know them personally. I make flashcards for myself with their names and faces at the beginning of the year because I'm terrible with names. I also recognize birthdays with a homework pass and a note (that would be a lot harder with the number of kids you work with!)

The other thing I had to figure out by myself was the right and wrong way to confront a kid who is misbehaving. Instead of "Lift your head and pay attention!," I now come over, crouch down, and ask "Are you feeling okay?" Kid might be sick, tired, in a horrible mood ... better to assume the best then accuse them of the worst. Someone posted this video recently, which I wish I'd seen my first year of teaching!

Do you have any positive reward systems in your class? My kids love class raffles for individual positive behavior, and my sixth graders love earning bouncy balls for positive class behavior. Fill the jar, and the class gets a prize (homework passes / cookies / mini party). I started seeing a lot more positive peer pressure to behave! If you can group the in small collaborative groups, then reward good group behavior, that can lead to positive peer pressure as well.

Don't give up. You'll adapt and grow, and every day will get better and you'll feel more natural.