Reddit mentions of LG Electronics 8X USB 2.0 Super Multi Ultra Slim Portable DVD+/-RW External Drive with M-DISC Support, Retail (Silver) GP60NS50

Overclocking

If you don't plan to overclock at all, which indeed isn't a requirement to do. You could save money by simply buying a cheaper CPU, CPU Cooler & motherboard.
There are certain programs that do like to have a faster clock speed and benefit from it. Certain programs don't really care much about it, including a lot of games.

I am absolutely certain that a non overclockable, cheaper CPU will be miles ahead in terms of performance compared to your laptop. Because a laptop CPU is very often a tuned down CPU compared to desktop ones. Because laptops need to run cool and not produce a lot of power to increase battery life. Thus the performance takes a big hit.

In terms of overclocking, you're absolutely correct that it became very user friendly in the last couple of years. I can overclock a CPU to a stable frequency in about 5-10 minutes for most CPUs. It does take me a while to get it to it's maximum, because than you have to tweak around a bit more.
Of course, every time you overclock you spend the most time.. doing nothing but stress testing. When I'm done and happy with the overclock of my CPU, I'll let the system stress test a whole night. To make sure it's really really stable.

As for cooling, no you do not need a watercooler to get the best performance in terms of cooling. Most $30-50 air coolers are able to keep the temperature well under control and get a stable overclock. Of course, if you really want to push the CPU to it's limit, it sometimes may require a more expensive cooler.
But for water & air, the performance is really close to each other. The best air coolers stay within touching distance of the best water coolers.
The reason why people go for water coolers is the sex appeal, sometimes performance (small spaces can benefit a lot from watercooling!) & the looks.

As for watercoolers and assembly. Do not fear, they're actually completely assembled and sealed at the factory. They come to you ready to install and you only need to connect the waterblock to the CPU, connect the fans to radiators and plug in the cables.
You're probably thinking about custom watercooling loops. Those are very much custom and can leak if mounted incorrectly or when you get a faulty component. Thus leak testing & maintenance is required.

Case

Okay the NZXT S340 is a very nice looking case, but sadly does not fit any 5,25" optical bays. So a CD drive won't fit in this case.
I actually highly recommend external USB optical drives for most people. I personally also use this and love it.

As for a red look, there aren't a whole lot like the S340 that are acceptable in price, ease of use & build quality. So the S340 absolutely gets my recommendation. But to give you an idea about other colors.

• Phanteks P400S | Color can be changed to 7 different options.
  
• NZXT H440 | A very large case, that is easy to work in, just a bit on the more expensive side.
  
• NZXT Noctis 450 | Even more expensive, but does provide a bit more "flair" and subtle aggressiveness to it.
  
• Corsair Spec Alpha | An aggressive styled case with not super awesome cable management.
  
• SilverStone Primera | SilverStone is very much known for their high quality cases, this one is no exception either. But it is fairly expensive.
  
  So there aren't a whole lot of cases that have red colors or red LED fans included. But the easy solution to this is to buy a solid black case and simply add red LED fans or light strips.
  
  I personally actually prefer to use white LEDs for coloring the case! What? Yes I mean that I prefer to get red accented components such as graphic cards, motherboards & RAM. Since you will see those and then use white LED to accent the red parts.
  
  
• Example of red LEDs used
  
• Example of white LEDs used #1
  
• Example of white LEDs used #2
  
  Just to get my point across, I prefer the white LEDs a lot more.
  
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  Let me know what you think about all this information and we can create the best PC for you possible.

>I want to be a DVD drive

Was the question if there is any method that allows your surface pro to use DVDs? If so, just use an external DVD player. This one can connect to your laptop with a USB connection.

I agree with the other guy. Go to Amazon and look at external DVD drives and reviews, around $30.

Like this one: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00C2AMKR2/

How much are these enclosures? I would also consider this LG USB DVD Drive as an alternative since it's only $26....

I just use this: https://www.amazon.com/LG-Electronics-Portable-Rewriter-GP60NS50/dp/B00C2AMKR2/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1519219624&sr=8-3&keywords=lg+slim+portable+dvd+writer+gp60nb50

I don't have a DVD drive in mine either but I keep that in a drawer in case I need one. Can't beat it for $22 and fits in a drawer easy.