Reddit mentions of Living among Meat Eaters: The Vegetarian's Survival Handbook

Re: SO

I have found that our loved ones are often fighting themselves, not us, when it comes to something as central to identity as veganism. (After all, if you do something three times a day 365 days a year, that's going to start correlating very heavily to who you are!) So sometimes, our loved ones are not really interested in engaging with the facts to be found in outside reality. If they were, I'm sure your SO would have found out himself that not only do vegans regularly get equivalent protein to nonvegans, but also a plant-based diet is almost uniformly agreed among registered dietitians to be the most nutrient-rich diet of all. Nonvegans who impose their view on their loved vegan ones may do so because they feel threatened by change. Their loved vegan ones are turning their backs to what society says it right, what will happen next - will she turn her back on me? Not only that, their own meat-eating habits are suddenly slid under the microscope of their consciousness.

It sounds like you are doing a great job with your SO so far: you are using an approach of compassion. Please continue to do so, for he will be in great discomfort and fear for the next month. He is already feeling strong discomfort with his own diet whenever he criticizes yours, and every time you mention your switch to veganism he feels his own terror at the knowledge of an alternative diet, one that involves so much less suffering for the world.

The fact that your SO reacts so strongly to your decision is actually quite promising. He would not be "so convinced" if he did not feel the need to first convince himself. After all, once he gives in and agrees that veganism is for the best, he will have to change his own behavior accordingly to align with veganism! And the one thing people are scared of the most is change!

The only way to pierce his bubble is to walk the talk. Do not waste valuable time in argument, if he starts talking about veganism with the clear angle of wanting to argue, you can simply say calmly "I don't want to discuss this further" and repeat as necessary. Should he resort to petty emotional manipulation, the question has shifted away from veganism altogether - veganism is now just a platform for a power play between the two of you. If this happens, you can say this as soon as you notice it, and direct the dialogue instead to how his words are making you feel: I feel unworthy and unloved because of your tone, I feel untrusted when you say that, etc. No SO wants to make you feel these things!

Your best argument will be your body. I wish you the best of luck in your vegan journey. Be patient, be joyful, and your efforts will pay off manifold. If you maintain complete or near-complete veganism this month, then your very presence will be a stronger argument than any words can make. Your own renewed health, your rejuvenated looks, your vitality in movement, will help open your SO's eyes to the truth.

If what I say sounds interesting, then may I suggest the ultimate primer on handling a meat-eating society and the conversations that can arise within them, [Living Among Meat Eaters] (http://www.amazon.com/Living-Among-Meat-Eaters-Vegetarians/dp/1590561163).

Re: Fullness

Bread is good. Fullness might relate to emotional memories of "fullness". Do you have good childhood memories of a relative preparing meat or cheese based dishes? You might then have the same memories about toasty bread with butter. That's easy to accomplish with SmartBalance.

On that note, heat really changes your perception of a meal. If you bring in an equal number of hot dishes, and try eating these frozen meals right after reheating, you'll get a feeling of fullness a cold meal (eg: tossed salad) cannot replicate.

Dried fruit is good. Dried mango and persimmon are high in carbs. Dried whole persimmon in particular is delicious when chilled.

Hope that helps and please do not hesitate if you have any further questions about veganism. I do not claim to be an expert but I can provide advice and tips to the best of my ability. Most of all, lots of love and happiness as you sail the path of compassion!

I'm currently reading through this and it is pretty good so far. It might be worth reading yourself in showing you how best to react to your mom.
https://www.amazon.com/Living-among-Meat-Eaters-Vegetarians/dp/1590561163

I suggest finding vegan support wherever you can. Check out Carol Adam's Living Among Meat Eaters: The Vegetarian's Survival Handbook. There are some good vegan podcasts like Midwest Vegan Radio, too.

If they are at all approachable, you could try to ask them to read something short or watch something to get them thinking. Present it as a way for them to understand why you've made the decision to be vegan, rather than an attempt to persuade them. I suggest a website that lists quick reasons to be vegan, the book Please Don't Eat the Animals, or the documentary Vegucated.