Reddit mentions of Playing Well with Others: Your Field Guide to Discovering, Exploring and Navigating the Kink, Leather and BDSM Communities

https://www.amazon.com/New-Topping-Book-Dossie-Easton/dp/B001TJV5DW

https://www.amazon.com/New-Bottoming-Book-Janet-Hardy/dp/1890159352/ref=pd_sbs_14_t_0/159-2529759-0556432?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=KEXYX8NPBXC1K8VSJF0N
New Topping and New Bottoming books a good overview of how to set up, the different types, and responsibilities of each person in a scene and explores the emotional side of it.


https://www.amazon.com/Playing-Well-Others-Discovering-Communities/dp/0937609587/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1483220806&sr=1-1&keywords=playing+well+with+others

Examines the entire kink culture and how and why people can safely get involved. All the different symbols, types of D/s way more definitions then I have here, the difference between a kink club, sex club, fetish night, leather bar etc. is all here. The back has a great long overview of many possible kinks and a chart for you to map out your experience and limit levels with each one. Also has a glossary of more books.

Also i'm new to relationships in general but to really learn how to make a woman feel good you might want to look into She Comes First. As you'll see from reviews even couples who've been together a long time really got 'energized' by the book. Also good at dispelling many myths around female sexuality that both men and women might think. https://www.amazon.com/She-Comes-First-Thinking-Pleasuring/dp/0060538260/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1483221177&sr=1-1&keywords=she+comes+first

The first thing to do is to disabuse yourself of the notion that real BDSM is anything like 50 Shades. Most of us hate that book, and with good reason - Christian and Ana's relationship is neither realistic nor healthy. If you come in looking for that kind of storybook experience, you will likely be disappointed.

If you're looking for reading on the Dom side, I'd recommend the following:

Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns

Playing Well With Others

The Loving Dominant

The New Topping Book

Also check out the link to r/bdsmfaq posted in this thread. It also might be worthwhile to take the test on bdsmtest.org - it will help you find specifically what you're into, which you can communicate to others.

(A caveat - those books, and most books about bdsm unfortunately, focus on male dom/top/d-type, female sub/bottom/s-type. I'm guessing based on your username you are female-identified. Good news - female doms are in very high demand! Bad news- while there are certainly resources for you, and you can certainly get good stuff out of those books, applicable material may be harder to find - as a bi guy myself, I'm often annoyed at how many rope tutorials involve knots that, ehem, would be uncomfortable for guys.)

From there, I'd look up munches in your area and go to a few. Don't expect any action, you'll just be getting to know people in the community. Maybe you'll find partners quickly, maybe it will take some time - there's a catch-22 for new doms, which is that people prefer to play with experienced doms, but you need to play with people to get experience. But by and large, most communities are very welcoming to newcomers. From there, the world is your oyster - have fun and be safe!

Playing Well with Others: Your Field Guide to Discovering, Navigating and Exploring the Kink, Leather and BDSM Communities

10/10 would recommend to anyone interested in or already experienced in BDSM/kink

https://www.amazon.com/Playing-Well-Others-Discovering-Communities/dp/0937609587

I'm a big fan of Lee Harrington. Have you read his new book, "Playing Well With Others?