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Reddit mentions of Sperm Wars: Infidelity, Sexual Conflict, and Other Bedroom Battles

Sentiment score: 7
Reddit mentions: 36

We found 36 Reddit mentions of Sperm Wars: Infidelity, Sexual Conflict, and Other Bedroom Battles. Here are the top ones.

Sperm Wars: Infidelity, Sexual Conflict, and Other Bedroom Battles
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Found 36 comments on Sperm Wars: Infidelity, Sexual Conflict, and Other Bedroom Battles:

u/[deleted] · 113 pointsr/AskReddit

Interesting sidenote: this phenomenon has been reported by many other people and the theory (this sort of thing can't be proven, so it's just speculation, I just want to be honest) as to why this is:

Many women occasionally enjoy simply watching their male partner get off--they want to see him ejaculate by whatever means, whether it's masturbation or with their assistance or whatever--and the theory as to why is that this is a trait women have evolved to have in order to, essentially, check and make sure all the guy's equipment is working correctly thereby reducing the odds that he's infertile and she's wasting a very precious amount of time and effort (or at least it would've been until very recently) on an infertile male. Requiring him to display his genitals and 'operate' them in front of her allows her to check for certain STDs (not all have visible symptoms but a lot do) and it allows her to see if he possibly has a low ejaculate volume (which lowers her odds of successfully reproducing with him) or for whatever reason has trouble getting it up and/or ejaculating. She's making sure all the equipment is healthy and in good working order before she invests time and effort into her would-be mate and, additionally, risks contracting a STD from him that could potentially make her incapable of ever reproducing (Chlamydia, for example, will do this to women if left untreated), which is a pretty big damned deal if you think about it.

Consequently...men have evolved to 'perform' as well as they physically can whenever a woman is watching them get off which means that the man will ejaculate as hard as he can and with as much semen as he can during such 'demonstrations', hence your experience: your brain subconsciously understood what was going on and told the body to let loose with everything it had in order to impress your girl with your massive ejaculate load and the force with which you could expel it, hopefully thereby convincing her that you would be a virile and healthy mate with which she could procreate :)

Source: Robin Baker's Sperm Wars (fascinating read, by the way)

u/foople · 67 pointsr/entertainment

Source

Watching this video and some of the others referenced, he seems to be saying that it's wrong to bulk classify all relationships between post-pubescent teenagers and adults as predatory, or at least that not all are predatory in the assumed direction. This is not a new idea. It also doesn't change that such behavior is illegal if the teen is below the age of consent.

According to the other referenced times he talked about pedophilia, he was molested himself by a priest at a young age - but he clearly views himself as the aggressor, and thus doesn't view it as rape, sexual assault or molestation. Legally, however, it was certainly a crime (statutory rape), because he was under the age of consent, but he can't square this with his own perception of events. He doesn't think of the priest as a villain, and refuses to identify the priest.

It's also not a new idea that young gay or bisexual men seek out older men for a relationship. This is, in fact, implied as a reason for gay hatred in the book Sperm Wars. The book is well sourced, and describes older civilizations where 50% or more of men were bisexual or gay, and the cultural expectation that gay and bisexual teens (around age 13) would seek out older men as mentors - intellectually, sexually and economically. The sexual advantage of bisexual men in this scenario (as described in the book, which is, obviously, of an evolutionary biology bent) is that early access to an experienced partner made them more successful with heterosexual women in their later teen years, compared to heterosexual men with no experience at all.

From the perspective of heterosexual men, this behavior means greater risk of venereal disease, competitive loss of early mate access, and economic disadvantage in a male-dominated society, which explains why heterosexual men might unite to fight against this behavior. Obviously we're (mostly) past this bigotry now, but it does still exist.

I would be shocked if these ideas aren't talked about in the homosexual community, especially if they really do feel an instinct to reach out to older men as teens (and Milo said that was exactly his motivation). It makes sense that homosexuals that experienced this behavior in themselves may see attempts to cast them as victims as wrong. From their perspective, making such activity illegal is a form of homophobia.

That said, anything that can be tied to pedophilia (and while Milo is technically correct that pedophilia is sexual attraction towards pre-pubescent children, anyone below the age of consent is the more widespread cultural, and of course legal, usage) is a political third rail and he's clearly a political figure. This is when advocating for personal responsibility and rejecting victimhood means you accept you were wrong and suffer the consequences.

u/DocGrey187000 · 36 pointsr/BlackPeopleTwitter

Asking for sources is a Good practice.



The book “Sperm Wars” by Robin Baker lays out in detail both how it works and why.



https://www.amazon.com/Sperm-Wars-Infidelity-Conflict-Bedroom/dp/1560258489


This article says the same thing I said: many can’t from penetration (75% it says here), and some never do at all (10% it says).



https://abcnews.go.com/Health/ReproductiveHealth/sex-study-female-orgasm-eludes-majority-women/story?id=8485289


This article mentions up top that 5-10% can’t at all, although the article is not about that exactly.


https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2011/05/why-cant-some-women-orgasm-neuroscience-might-finally-have-an-answer/238767/

u/Gravitom · 11 pointsr/videos

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Sperm-Wars-Infidelity-Conflict-Bedroom/dp/1560258489

This is a good book on the subject. They speculate 20% of children are raised unknowingly by a man who isn't their father (who don't know as well).

u/psykocrime · 8 pointsr/relationship_advice

> my info: im a super nerd. like i follow the pro starcraft scene and love space, science math etc. in really tall and am fairly lanky.

That's not necessarily bad... but if you want to do well with women, you'd be well served to not look the part of a "super nerd." Dress fashionably, but with a unique edge that sets your style apart from others. If you need help figuring out how to do that, hit up some of your female friends for advice, peruse GQ or Esquire or Mens Vogue, whatever.

> I tend to only have crushes on best friends and my last crush was when i was 17 (different person). Ive been caled a sweet heart and get frustrated when guys are disrespectful.

Guys get like that when they are scared to break rapport with women, and the only thing they can do is try to use pure "comfort game" to get close to the girls. Unfortunately, the result - as you may have noticed - is not usually favorable. Building comfort is important, but you have to do more... if you want girls, you have to project the vibe of a confident, mature, masculine, "in control", sexual man who "gets it." The "nerdy, insecure, shy, awkward teenage geek" vibe is a lot less effective.


> Ive been caled a sweet heart and get frustrated when guys are disrespectful.

You probably have both Nice Guy Syndrome and a touch of Disney Fantasy. I highly recommend you read the Dr. Robert Glover book No More Mr. Nice Guy, and the Neil Strauss book The Game. The former should help you understand more about asserting yourself, establishing boundaries, and being more authentic in your interactions with people. The latter will blow your mind in regards to understanding how men and women interact.

After that, it might not hurt to read Way of the Superior Man by Dave Deida.

Also, to disabuse yourself of the notion that women are all sweet and pure and innocent and virtuous and made of light (or sugar and spice and puppy dog tails, whatever) spend some time reading stuff like My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday, or The Good Girl's Guide to Bad Girl Sex by Barbara Keesling, or Chelsea Handler's My Horizontal Life.

Finally, read Sperm Wars by Robin Baker. That will make a great many things much clearer.

u/Bobsutan · 5 pointsr/relationships

The female sexual response is characterized by a dual nature, colloquially referred to as "Alpha fucks, Beta bucks".

Read more in

Sperm Wars

The Red Queen

u/escaday · 5 pointsr/italy

L'ho tirata fuori perché le uniche obiezioni alla famiglia omosessuale sono di natura religiosa. Ti consiglio la lettura di questo, è interessante.

> Ah, se poi il fatto che lo stato naturale abbia selezionato l'ambiente dotato della complementarietà dei sessi come l'unico adatto alla perpetrazione della specie non ti sembra un buon fondamento…

Eh però qui ti stai avventurando in campo che non ti conviene. La complementarietà dei sessi è necessaria alla perpetrazione della specie dal punto di vista riproduttivo. Maschio + femmina = figlio. Da nessuna parte nel nostro codice genetico c'è un istinto alla monogamia. Anzi siamo fatti esattamente al contrario (ti consiglio la lettura di Sperm Wars o di The red queen se vuoi chiarirti le idee). La crescita dei figli non è perfettamente sovrapponibile al concepimento dal punto di vista biologico. L'idea che la "famiglia tradizionale" sia il costrutto sociale ideale per la crescita dei figli non ha un fondamento scientifico.

u/barbaq24 · 4 pointsr/AskMen

Sperm Wars: Infidelity, Sexual Conflict, and Other Bedroom Battles https://www.amazon.com/dp/1560258489/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_T-7vCbXSNZTJ0

I once read this book. It pretty much is the science of sex and reproduction. It was the Pinnacle of sex science around 2006.

u/4amPhilosophy · 4 pointsr/relationship_advice

The tone of this poster is very inflamatory, but the information in the above post is backed by some serious research. Reproduction is major business, after all animals have adapted to their detriment to attract mates (think male peacocks, those tails make them easier prey.) Humans are just as influenced by biology as any other animal. We however, can educate ourselves and modify our behaviors as we see fit. I highly recommend the following books to anyone with the smallest interest in this topic. They are all fascinating reads and I guarentee brain = asplode when you read them.

Sperm Wars by Robin Baker

The Red Queen: Sex and the Evolution of Human Nature, by Matt Ridley

The Selfish Gene, by Richard Dawkins

The Myth of Monogamy: Fidelity and Infidelity in Animals and People by David P. Barash Ph.D. and Judith Eve Lipton

Also, I'm a gal, and understanding how evolutionary biology made humans behave the way they do has been a real eye opener. Let me tell you, bars and clubs are infinitely more amusing now. The people watching has taken on a whole new level of entertainment!

EDIT: The links were messed up, had to fix that.

u/______IRONMAN______ · 4 pointsr/MGTOW

> and a woman is far more likely to conceive through a casual fling than through sex with her regular partner

Sperm Wars: Infidelity, Sexual Conflict, and Other Bedroom Battles

https://www.amazon.com/Sperm-Wars-Infidelity-Conflict-Bedroom/dp/1560258489

u/Freezerburn · 3 pointsr/AskReddit

What has just happened has been covered in Sperm Wars.

http://www.amazon.com/Sperm-Wars-Infidelity-Conflict-Bedroom/dp/1560258489

You now serve as a warning to others, always wrap up and have some Tabasco sauce to pour into the used condom. If hear a scream you know she was planning to fuck you over.

Start saving money and play the next steps with caution. Shit is about to get messy, I don't envy you. Once sperm enters her hole, it's her sperm. If you want to be part of the babies life then see if her family will help you get back with a job or something. Only my opinion, and I don't know all the details so ultimately you're the grown up now.

u/baconOclock · 3 pointsr/TheRedPill

The recommendations from other Red Pillers are pretty good so far, let me add some things that are a little bit different.

Sperm Wars

The Mating Mind

Dangerous Passion or just about anything from David M. Buss.

u/mbatterham · 3 pointsr/AskReddit

I just realised I shouldn't have put best of both worlds (seeing as shemale porn doesn't do it for me).

If you find this interesting, can I suggest the book Sperm Wars?. The title may be off-putting, but it's the exact reason men get turned on by penises.

u/x32792 · 2 pointsr/MGTOW

I've heard and read similar stats before. In trying retrace my web search, I came across this:

RE: 20 to 25% Percent of Children in a Marriage - Not Husband's

"I'm not surprised. Read the book "Sperm Wars" and you'll learn that only about 40% of Men across human history have been successful at continuing their lineage with offspring. Women are much higher at about 80-85% success rate."

http://amzn.com/1560258489

Do a little web search and I'm sure you can find some interesting numbers and reported facts that will make the hair on the back of hour neck stand up.

u/ClockworkPUA · 2 pointsr/TheRedPill

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1560258489

Sperm Wars: Infidelity, Sexual Conflict, and Other Bedroom Battles by
Robin Baker

u/HellhoundsOnMyTrail · 2 pointsr/OkCupid
u/northerntransplant · 2 pointsr/sex

Then you my friend should read the wonderful book, Sperm wars.

u/User-31f64a4e · 2 pointsr/MGTOW

Right. As Robin Baker outlines it in Sperm Wars:

  • Female orgasm increases the odds of pregnancy; it is not simply a spandrel based on male orgasm.
  • Women want to breed with successful men. Successful in the evolutionary sense.
  • Rape is dangerous (due to brothers, fathers, husbands, police, opposing armies, etc.) To be in a position to pull it off means you have overpowered or outwitted all the above. In evolutionary terms, you have good genes. [It may also mean you are a bit of a sociopath, which in small doses also leads to success. Successful men reproduce more; rapists may have a slight edge in worldly success. Think of Bill Clinton here, not some redneck looser who actually got caught ...]
  • Thus if a woman has an orgasm with a rapist, she is more likely to have little rapist boys of her own to pass on her genes.

    Evolution doesn't much care about right or wrong - only what works.
u/ryeshoes · 2 pointsr/MGTOW

She's referring to Sperm Wars (Baker) which only seeks to describe what happens if there were multiple partners involved in sexual selection.

It's hardly evidence that one ought to engage in sperm competition unless confirmation bias counts as proof of an ought.

u/ohstrangeone · 1 pointr/AskReddit

Ever read Robin Bakers' Sperm Wars? It's one of my favorite evolutionary psychology books, I think you'd really like it, check it out: Amazon link

u/MetaMemeticMagician · 1 pointr/TheNewRight

Sex

The Way of Men – Jack Donovan***
Sperm Wars – Robin Baker
Sex at Dawn – Christopher Ryan
Why Men Rule – Steven Goldberg
The Manipulated Man – Esther Vilar
Is There Anything Good About Men? – Roy Baumeister
Demonic Males – Dale Peterson
The Essential Difference – Simon Baron-Cohen
The Mating Mind – Geoffrey Miller
The Red Queen – Matt Ridley

****

Government

Mau-mauing the Flak Catchers – Tom Wolfe
Public Choice: An Introduction – Iain McLean
On Government Employment – Foseti (blog post)
Yes, Minister – TV Show

****

​

u/bearsinthesea · 1 pointr/science

My wife bought a book all about this kind of thing called Sperm Wars. It talks about the adaptive reasons for behaviour like this, and each chapter has a sexy vignette example. For instance, girls that say no but mean yes (at least for a little while).

http://www.amazon.com/Sperm-Wars-Infidelity-Conflict-Bedroom/dp/1560258489/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1250015521&sr=8-1

u/fernandoleon · 1 pointr/TheRedPill

I've read it. It's evolutionary psyche/behavioral psyche. Not a bad read, but Ridley comes across more as a pop-science author than an actual scientist.

I liked this and this much more.

u/djadvance22 · 1 pointr/WTF

good point, but the main thing isn't pheromones. it's whatever conveys high social status, which you can convey with a strong mix of confidence and humor.

read Sperm Wars for more

u/Cloud_Riverdale · 1 pointr/bahai

blinks. He's a tenured behavioural psychologist citing well known research. When you read peer reviewed papers they're often hyper focused on a particular facet of human attraction and so you're better off reading a book or listening to an expert distil it down.

Also, in particular, which arguments do you want sources for? I've made many.

A most fascinating book that comes to mind is called "Why women have sex" and based on interviews with 1400 women.

https://www.amazon.com/Why-Women-Have-Sex-Everything/dp/0312662653/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1495828392&sr=8-1&keywords=why+women+have

Here are some other links.

https://www.amazon.com/Evolution-Desire-Strategies-Human-Mating/dp/0465097766/ref=pd_sim_14_1?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=0465097766&pd_rd_r=VYY1T032QJ8Z4939ECE5&pd_rd_w=rTQyP&pd_rd_wg=6yFrD&psc=1&refRID=VYY1T032QJ8Z4939ECE5



https://www.amazon.com/Sperm-Wars-Infidelity-Conflict-Bedroom/dp/1560258489/ref=pd_sim_14_6?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=1560258489&pd_rd_r=VYY1T032QJ8Z4939ECE5&pd_rd_w=rTQyP&pd_rd_wg=6yFrD&psc=1&refRID=VYY1T032QJ8Z4939ECE5

u/lectrick · 1 pointr/AskReddit

Actually, actual evidence (source) seems to suggest that a single episode of cheating can have a much higher chance of conception because our bodies' biology is fucked up like that and would sometimes prefer to cuckold one man with a supposedly better man's genes given a single opportunity. Along the same lines, apparently our sperm make a little extra effort if we ourselves fuck around... many of us understand the lure and excitement of a little "strange" and that's why... in both cases you're putting the cost of spreading your genes well on someone else and of course your body finds that very exciting.

This is even more of a reason to leave someone for fucking around though as if a woman's body is telling her to fuck other men that are apparently better for her then clearly you are not that man.

u/tuna_safe_dolphin · 1 pointr/AskReddit

Ahh, so I'm not the only one who's read Sperm Wars.

u/Paul-ish · 1 pointr/sex

Sorry if I seem curt, but I know about oxytocin and all that jazz. I read Sperm Wars, Dangerous Passion, and whatever the heck else is required by psych classes. A point I would like to make is that our sexuality isn't monogamous or polyamourous by evolution. People like to read psych books and conclude that we are poly or mono amorous to confirm their own choice.

The truth, as I see it from those texts, is that humans evolved from deceivers. We do we we can get away with, trying to spread our genes as much as possible. Monogamy or polyamory are just strategies employed to achieve this goal, cast of at a moment in favor of gene spreading deception. A polyamourous partner can go outside the relationship just as a monogamous partner can.

It may seem strange that I care so much and I am getting away from the original argument, but I want to drive home that we are not the "prehuman monstrosity" we evolved from. We can stay faithful because, even though it might be in our genetic interest not to, we really care about someone. We are not our genes.

>Laughter to begin with was probably glee at the misfortunes of others. The baring of teeth in laughter hints at its savage ancestry. Animals have no malice, hence also no laughter. They never savor the sudden glory of schadenfreude. It was its infectious quality which made laughter a medium of mutuality.

>Beasts are not beastly. The evil of dehumanization is not that it turns us into animals but turns us into the malignant prehuman monstrosity from which man evolved. -Eric Hoffer

/rant

u/Whatever4ever · 1 pointr/AskReddit

Sperm Wars by Robin Baker.

Blew my fucking mind when I read it.

u/gensyms · 1 pointr/TheRedPill

> We aren't the descendants of the guys who got cheated on

Many of us are the descendants of the guys who got cheated on. For any given generation, it's at least 10%.

See Sperm Wars.

u/PRW63 · -2 pointsr/dating

>I don’t get off from it and find it painful if I’m not properly lubricated.

Stop messing around with guys who don't know what they are doing and neither of those will be a problem. And I don't mean just in bed,...I mean not knowing what they are doing over all in general. This happens because you are just not that into the guy,...and most of the time that is the guy's fault.

I don't know of any material directly addressing this. But this one book includes some of this. If nothing else it will help you understand yourself better and more importantly will help you know the difference between biological drives and psychological/emotional drives and how the two work in tandem within you. It is important to read the introduction at the beginning of the book to grasp it's purpose before getting into the rest of the book. I am currently working my way through the book right now.

https://www.amazon.com/Sperm-Wars-Infidelity-Conflict-Bedroom/dp/1560258489

u/JT91733 · -4 pointsr/AskWomen

Spermwars: Robin Baker
Evolutionary Psychology.. highly recommended