Reddit mentions of Tails Are Not for Pulling (Board Book) (Best Behavior Series)

Check out the book Tails Are Not For Pulling. You want to emphasize that dogs have feelings too and it makes them sad/scared when he hurts them. Show him how to pet the dogs gently and praise him like crazy, telling him how happy they are. Give him as little attention as possible when he treats the dogs roughly, just matter-of-factly remove him from the situation, so he doesn’t get any positive reinforcement for that behavior.

Having said that though, he should absolutely never be left with a dog unsupervised, no matter how tolerant your dogs are. You need to be within arms reach at all times to correct his behavior or remove him from the situation - both for the dog’s sake and his. I assume the bite from the friend’s dog wasn’t serious, but he got very lucky, and may not be so lucky next time.

Tons of stuff, more than I could type out. Basically, discipline needs to be more than just punishment, it should also be teaching the child the proper behavior. This is a good link to start with.

https://www2.aap.org/sections/scan/practicingsafety/Modules/EffectiveDiscipline/EffectiveDiscipline.pdf

Note that this mentions time outs, but used in a different way than how most people use them. It's not a punishment but a way to give the kid some space and let them cool down when frustrated and misbehaving. It's also a last resort.

With the cat problem, out daughter had the same problem at that age. what worked for us was redirection and discussing it with her. Asking "what happens when you pull the cats tail" and "why do we not want to pull the cats tail." Our daughter was able to answer because we reminded her plenty that when she pulled the cats tail it hurt the cat, and we don't want to hurt the kitty because it's not nice and also because it could make the kitty mad and the kitty could hurt you back. If this is an ongoing problem there are a few books in the best behavior series that my daughter loves, like Tails are Not For Pulling, but hands are not for hitting and words are not for hurting are great ones too. Each of these books has a page in the back for parents for guidance when their children have these issues. Highly recommended.

tails are not for pulling is an excellent book for you to read to her

Mom of a 14 month old here. Couple of suggestions:

>only naps 30 minutes, and it takes at least that to get him to sleep. It used to be 1-2+ hours

We are also going through this - it came out of no where. My baby was sleep trained at 6 months and went from never making a peep at nap or bedtime, to blue-in-the-face screaming and napping for 30 minutes to. I have determined the main cause to be separation anxiety, which is peaking right now. A stuffed animal helps and long drawn out good-byes (never just disappear or sneak out of the room). He's gotten better - taking 10 minutes to settle down and sleeping around 1-1.5 hours now for naps.

>he is terrorising my cats,

We also have a cat that our babe is obsessed with. He does get aggressive and we have also put in lots of hours teaching "gentle hands" etc. There is a board book: Tails are not for pulling that you may find helpful. I would say keep reinforcing gentle hands and you will have to be a referee here. Also make sure your cats have plenty of place they can hang out that are up high and places to hide.

As far as how he is acting in public - I can't help there, just sympathy. We don't go out much...if we do it is short errands or to the library for reading group. Maybe longer excursions are overstimulating?

And sleeping at night...again, separation anxiety. I hope that it gets better for both of us soon...until then, I stand with you in solidarity.

I probably should not even respond since I don't have cats but for my dogs since kid was around a yr if he bugged the dogs I would insure I remove him or give the dogs a place to go. If he pulled at them i would show him how to be gentle with the dogs and repeat it is not nice to grab them. He is 2.5 now and he is very good about giving them room if they move away from him or being gentle when he is playing with them.
We have used several books in this series to correct behaviors we did not like but have not used this one in particular since he kind of stopped once we corrected him a ton (before i found this series) but a few parents in our toddler class say they used it and it worked well.

Tails Are Not for Pulling (Board Book) (Best Behavior Series) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1575421801/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_4iglzb4EWSY10