Best products from r/DatingAfterThirty
We found 12 comments on r/DatingAfterThirty discussing the most recommended products. We ran sentiment analysis on each of these comments to determine how redditors feel about different products. We found 10 products and ranked them based on the amount of positive reactions they received. Here are the top 20.
1. Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find--and Keep-- Love
- Createspace
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4. Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help YouFind - and Keep - Love
- Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find-and Keep-Love
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5. Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
- Great product!
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6. The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations for Codependents (Hazelden Meditation Series)
- Great product!
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I'm 36 and have never had a committed relationship. I read this book and it was just what I needed. I stopped thinking it was me, and realized it's really just a matter of luck. I'd also rather be by myself than with someone just to be with someone. Might be a good time to take a break (especially from OLD) and work on your confidence. Make some female friends that might have some advice.
RE: sex I agree with the comments below that every person is basically a blank slate. Just communicate and be attentive to what they like and it will be great.
Have you read the book Attached yet? I think it might give some insight into things. I'm currently reading it, and it's been making me think a lot about my own attachment style, how that has played into previous/my current relationships.
But as others have said, it wasn't anything you did or didn't do. It wasn't a case of 'if I did x, then we would have lasted!'. I think it was more about incompatibility, as it seems he wanted to keep things at arm's length while you wanted a close relationship. And there's nothing wrong with that!
Take some time and heal. Lots of internet hugs.
I have given this book to many friends and used it as a Bible to exit a relationship. You will look at the title, maybe even the description, and think it doesn't apply to you. Then you read it and... 💡
Co-Dependent No More By Melody Beattie
Also recommend the amazing The Language of Letting GO
I enjoyed Alan Watts - The Book. This man certainly did not give unwarranted fucks!
https://www.amazon.com/Book-Taboo-Against-Knowing-Who/dp/0679723005?crid=T8358G0DP00B&keywords=alan+watts+the+book&qid=1527056347&sprefix=alan+watts+the+book&sr=8-1&ref=mp_s_a_1_1
Yeah, no offense, but that would be a deal breaker for me as well, whether you intend to quit or not.
Also, pardon the unsolicited advice, but I was a heavy smoker for 12 years--the kind of person that everyone thought would never quit and I quit with ease with the help of this book and I haven't touched or even wanted a cigarette for 12 years now: https://www.amazon.com/Allen-Carrs-Easy-Stop-Smoking/dp/0615482155/ref=sr_1_3?keywords=how+to+stop+smoking&qid=1557176223&s=gateway&sr=8-3 There's not better time to quit than now. Smoking really is going to be a deal breaker for a lot of guys, sorry to be blunt.
One about human sexual behavior that ends up being good reading for the non monogamously inclined, but might also be a good read for everyone: Sex at Dawn
Sounds like you have something of an anxious attachment style. I read this book a few years ago and it helped me understand this phenomenon and handle my own anxiety better.
https://www.amazon.com/Attached-Attachment-Find-Keep-Love-Find-ebook/dp/B0049H9AVU/ref=sr_1_3?keywords=attached&qid=1558895740&s=gateway&sr=8-3
I'd recommend https://www.amazon.com/How-Talk-Anyone-Success-Relationships/dp/B013GXDRKC/ref=sr_1_1?crid=5LR0RULGN468&keywords=how+to+talk+to+anyone+92+little+tricks&qid=1569245444&sprefix=how+to+talk+to+anyone%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1
Even if you just pick up one or two parts that really speak to you then it's worth the read in my opinion.
Check out It Didn't Start With You - it might help. It helped me.