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> I tried to reach out to a local Rabbi, and she simply turned me to a
> website. (I understand she is busy.)

Not to defend a particular Rabbi, but it’s worth remembering that Judaism isn’t an evangelising religious tradition.

Judaism is a tribal religion (perhaps best thought of as an ethnos in the Greek sense: a ‘people’) and it rather shies away from universal claims.

So the tradition of conversion is utterly unlike that of an evangelical religions like Christianity or Islam. Lots of ‘are you sure?’. Absolutely no ‘you have to join us or everything is just awful’.

The standard story is that Rabbis will turn you away three times if you come to them seeking to convert. It’s not strictly true but it is true that Rabbis will generally start by asking why you want to join rather than rolling out the welcome mat and crying ‘sister!’.

The Rabbi you encountered may well have used ‘take some time to read [website address here]’ as her version of the ‘are you sure?’ question.

Once you’ve studied the site in question (and I recommend doing the study, BTW), go back to the Rabbi and say you’ve done the required reading and now you want to talk some more.

A serious-minded approach is probably best here, because conversion to Judaism is a serious commitment.

The figure to keep in mind is Ruth, often called the Mother of all Converts:

For whither thou goes, I will go;
And where thou lodges, I will lodge;
Your people are my people, and your G‑d, my G‑d.
Where thou dies, will I die, and there be buried;
— Ruth 1:16–17

Becoming Jewish is as much about joining a new tribe — ‘Your people are my people’ — as it is about taking on the tenets and practices of a new (to you) religious tradition.

> Resources

A few resources off the top of my head (including several web-sites; so sorry to go down the same path as your local rabbi):

Choosing a Jewish life: a handbook for people converting to Judaism and for their family and friends, by Anita Diamant.

Perhaps the classic book on ‘how to convert’, especially if you are in the United States. A little old now (it may be ‘revised and updated’ but this most recent edition was published almost twenty years ago) but still very useful.

Orthodox conversion to Judaism

The web-site run by the Rabbinical Council of America (the organising rabbinical structure for Orthodox Jews in the US) to ‘establish an improved and more dependable conversion process that would Be fully in accordance with Halachah (Jewish law)’.

Reform conversion to Judaism

The Reform Judaism sub-site on conversion. Include links to personal stories, articles on the process and an on-line study course.

Links returned by searching on ‘conversion’ at ReformJudaism.org

More than you probably want to read about converting in the Reform tradition, plus lots of personal stories of conversion.

Conversion to Judaism

An online study course for prospective converts, created and maintained by Rabbi Celso Cukierkorn of the Adat Achim synagogue in Florida. The aside from the study materials the site includes a page of Personal conversion experiences.

The Washington Institute for conversion and the study of Judaism

Another online resource and study course for people considering converting, this one run by Rabbi Bernice Weiss from Maryland. Weiss is also co-author of a book — [Converting to Judaism: choosing to be Chosen](http://converttojudaism.org/converting.htm) — which consists of personal stories of conversion.

Becoming Jewish

A web-site run by and for Jews By Choice (ie, people who’ve converted to Judaism). Aside from resources and places to look for more info, the site includes a collection of stories by others who’ve made the conversion journey

> personal stories

[Life with Ruth: your people, my people*](https://amazon.com/Life-Ruth-Your-People-My-ebook/dp/B00HFFAT3G), by Ruth Hanna Sachs.

A memoir focusing on the author’s journey to Judaism, haltingly started in the late-1960s and early-1970s but only properly taken in the late-1990s.

‘10 things nobody told me about converting to Judaism’, by Anna Thomson.

A 2014 article (or ‘listicle’ if you will) about converting to Modern Orthodox Judaism after meeting and falling in love with a Modern Orthodox Jew.

‘Conversion: a Black Jewish can-do story’, by Stephanie Ambroise.

A 2016 article about ‘[h]ow one woman went from having no idea what Shabbat was to celebrating it every week.’

‘From looking Jewish to being Jewish’, by Esther Hugenholtz.

A 2016 article by a cultural anthropologist about ‘going native’ (to such an extent she became a Rabbi and now serves a congregation).

‘A global conversion’, by Rachael Bregman.

A 2016 article about the formal conversion of a woman in her 80s who’d been living a Jewish life since she was a teenager but had not formally converted ‘because it would have hurt her mother deeply’.

The woman converting was in New South Wales. The Em Beit Din overseeing her conversion were in Tennessee, New York, and New Mexico.

The Becoming Jewish (see above) blog, Into the Jewish pool, includes multiple personal stories about, you guessed it, becoming Jewish.

Finally, Rabbi Mark Kaiserman has an Amazon listmania page dedicated to Books about converting to Judaism. More than enough personal stories here to last a year’s worth of reading time.

> guidance

Joining a tribe isn’t easy. There are obstacles and challenges, some of them internal and some of them put in place by the tribe you seek to join.

My partner made the journey from Dutch Catholicism to Reconstructionist Judaism more than thirty years ago.

And they’ve been asked about this more than a few times over the years.

When asked by someone contemplating the journey their short answer these days is ‘it won’t always be easy, but it should always feel right.’.

Hope this is at least diverting, if not helpful.

Find a rabbi you are comfortable with, and don't be shy to meet with a few before moving forward.

I had met with two rabbis before choosing the one who made me feel the most comfortable with my decision. The first two I met with were orthodox, quite conservative and I didn't click with either and the process seemed a bit too intense for what my fiance and I were looking for. Then we came across a reform synagogue and we fell in love with the rabbi there and we're completing our first round of classes in a couple of weeks.

It's been a beautiful process so far and it's exciting! There are several books I too found good, some of them were provided with our classes as well:

• What is a Jew? by Morris Kertzer
  
• Living a Jewish Life by Anita Diamant
  
• Jewish Literacy by Joseph Telushkin
  
• Jewish Book of Why by Alfred Kolatch
  
  Best of luck in your research!

I don't know if your daughters like to bake or cook or do anything involving the kitchen, but my younger sister and I were always excited about food. Last year I bugged my mom into making sufganiyot with me when I visited her (I'm in my 20s now). She made 2 or 3 different jams and a pastry cream, as well as a chocolate glaze. We spent the whole morning frying, filling, and decorating the sufganiyot for the five people in the house. This year she's coming to my apartment and we're doing this ugly Chanukah sweater sugar cookie kit. She had gotten a Halloween one on sale that we had a lot of fun with.

Care.com has this 101 Chanukah activity list you could look through. Personally, I think more of them are geared towards younger kids, but could easily be adapted for preteens and teenagers.

I'm not sure if this will be very helpful for you, but I hope you're able to get them excited for Chanukah!

>I hope it's ok to mention this but I just launched my newest cookbook, The Newish Jewish Cookbook!https://www.amazon.com/Newish-Jewish-Cookbook-marcy-goldman/dp/1927936306/ref=sr\_1\_1?keywords=newish+jewish&qid=1551016827&s=gateway&sr=8-1
>
>It's over 140 recipes from holidays to everyday (even Passover and Vegetarian). It's in print and ebook on Amazon and anyone who purchases it gets two months bonus free - of all access to my website.

Thank you!

Two things, /r/Judaism is a more active sub than this, so you might get a bit more help there. They tend to be quite welcoming.

Also, as far as recipes, there is a neat book called The Gefilte Manifesto with a lot of good traditional (Ashkenazi) recipes. But the best place to find recipes would be your fiancés family.

I’m glad you were able to get an apology from her. Maybe she will indeed learn something. Which is amazing. Also you are amazing for wanting to educate your class.

Although you probably saw it in your research, this entry from the US Holocaust Museum is quite good:
https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/antisemitism

If you can find it, the book Why The Jews? by Joseph Telushkin and Dennis Prager might be an interesting resource.

This is an absolutely awesome Reform book, I promise it will not disappoint: On the doorposts of your house http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/088123043X

It has prayer or reading (psalms) for any kind of occasion such as distress, depression, happiness, starting something new, or not knowing what to do. It is truly a beautiful book.

By the way you are doing a wonderful mitzvah for your friend. Judaism is all about bringing light into darkness.

I was in a very similar situation as you! I found this book to be super helpful for filling in the gaps in my knowledge.

Simpletoremember.com is also amazing. Highly recommended speakers: Rabbi Dr. Dovid Gottlieb & Rabbi Lawrence Kelemen.

There are also retreats and such that help a lot with this stuff, but it can depend on where you're located. I can give you suggestions if you let me know where in the world you are. (Feel free to PM.)

There is a cool book on the subject !

https://www.amazon.com/Jewish-Century-Yuri-Slezkine/dp/0691127603

It's written by an American Historian. Basically, it explains why Jewish pepole are fit to thrive in today's world, mainly due to their culture. I highly recommand it, it's very interesting

wonderful book

The Story of the Jewish People: Letters to Auntie Fori

https://www.amazon.com/Story-Jewish-People-Letters-Auntie-ebook/dp/B07H174F9N/ref=sr_1_24?crid=34YVWYXPPT56O&keywords=martin+gilbert+books&qid=1571835560&sprefix=martin+gilbert%2Caps%2C315&sr=8-24

"The Jewish Book of Why" explains the reason/s behind various Jewish traditions. As a fellow secular Russian Jew, I found it to be the perfect combo of informative and not preachy: https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0142196193/