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Thanks for sharing your situation, I hope we're able to offer some empathy and ideas that'll help at least a little in your situation.

I can imagine how incredibly distressing it must be to pour so much of your being into something so important to you, then not be seen for the s contribution you made. Sounds like you really just would like some appreciation and celebration of your efforts?

If you're open to some ideas, so here's a few that come to mind:

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1. Empathy first

Firstly, obviously I encourage you to get the empathy you need. If you can get empathy from friends or loved ones, that will help you to release a lot of the stored emotions which will mean that if you do approach your coworkers, you'll be able to be that much more clear, present, and ready. So, if you've got a friend or two to ask if you can vent about it to, I'd go for that first. Sharing here is often helpful in that regard as well, so you're probably already well on your way with this one.

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2. Finding Clarity

I feel one of the most important questions we can ask ourselves in any difficult situation is:

> What do I really want?

This may sound lame, but it has been absolutely essential in my experience. When we ask ourselves what we really want, we get out of our head, drop the blame, and focus on where we actually want to put our energy that'll benefit everyone.

Example: A few months back, I posted here when I was seriously upset by a weird thing that happened with my housemates. Basically, they decided at a meeting I couldn't make it to that I could no longer play music in the shower, but they didn't put it in the meeting notes and brought it up to me in a weird indirect way. I felt really hurt that they didn't bring it to me directly, and shocked that it wasn't put it in the meeting notes since it was a decision that was discussed.

When I asked myself, "What do I really want?" I realized that I wanted basically two things:

a. Honest Self-Expression: To honestly express and hopefully be heard for at least some of my pain around this and…

b. Agreement for Change: To create a culture where it doesn't happen again moving forward. Specifically, by seeing if we can all agree to put ALL decisions in the meeting notes, and directly reach out to someone should a decision impact them significantly.

So, I wrote out basically what I hoped to say. In the moment, I was still fairly charged bringing it forward to the group, which generated some intensity, but everyone agreed that it was weird how that happened and agreed to my two requests (1. ensuring all decisions get in the notes and 2. proactively reaching out to anyone directly impacted by a meeting decision.)

It was such a struggle for me to bring this forward when I felt like the whole group had let me down and thrown me under the bus behind my back. Or at least that's the story I was telling myself… But when I got clear and specific on what I wanted, I could find a way to bring it forward in a way that was honest, could be used benefit everyone, rather than cause unnecessary drama.

Not sure if this is helpful. But what I sense is that you might be in a similar place as I was before I brought forward my concern to the group, and I know for me it really helped to be clear about the exact outcomes I wanted.

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3. Creating Safety: Mutual Respect + Shared Purpose

When we go into crucial conversations, the last thing we want is for it to go into silence (shut downs, refusing to talk) or violence (attack, blame, etc.). So it helps to understand why that occurs, and do our very best to prevent it.

The biggest reason conversations break down into silence or violence, is when people fear one of two things:

1. The other person doesn't care about me. (Disrespect)
   
2. The other person doesn't care about what I want. (Divergent Goals)
   
   So to prevent silence or violence, we do the opposite: We create safety. And that's done by:
   
   
3. Mutual Respect: Establishing our respect for the other(s) involved
   
4. Shared Purpose: Create a shared goal for the conversation, some outcome that's desirable for everyone.
   
   So, let's say you go into this conversation with your supervisor, who took credit for the project. If you don't create a sense of safety for your supervisor, the worst case would be 1) he thinks you're basically saying he's an egotistical jerk or 2) he thinks what you want is to diminish the credit he received and downplay his contribution.
   
   Neither of those implications would be starting the conversation off on a very good foot…
   
   So, if you're with me on this, I would suggest you do the opposite. Create a sense of safety in the conversation by establishing:
   
   
5. Mutual Respect: Perhaps you can express your respect for his role in the project and the ways you appreciate the job he's done on this
   
6. Shared Purpose: Ask how could what you want benefit him? So if you want to create a culture where everyone is recognized for their contribution, that could yield MAJOR wins for him as well — employee retention, team strength, not to mention creative confidence.
   
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   (PS This point on safety is straight out of the book Crucial Conversations, not from me, highly recommended!)
   
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   Summary
   

   
   Anyway, so just to summarize, basically I'm suggesting get empathy first, get clarity of what you want, then plan your conversation by establishing mutual respect & shared purpose.
   
   So how might that sound in conversation? Let's say his name is Tim. Here's just an off-the-top-of-my-head example of how those ideas could come together. Probably nothing like what you actually want to say to him, just an example of how those ideas could be brought together:
   
   >Hey Tim, there's something I've been meaning to talk to you about. It's a bit difficult to bring up, but I think talking about it could really help the strength of our team. You know that project we just finished? Well I'm incredibly proud of the work we did, and I want you to know how much I appreciate what you did to _____ in moving that project forward. One thing I wanted to let you know is that when I saw that my name wasn't mentioned anywhere, I felt pretty bummed because I felt I played an important role on that project - in fact, I was the one who brought forward the idea to others - and I guess I just wanted some kind of recognition of all the work I put into it. I know it's tough to credit everyone, but I feel that when our team members get acknowledgement for their work, it can really energize them to keep up the good work. But when we're not, I don't know about for others but for me, it makes me feel like no one is seeing all the work I'm doing. And that feels exhausting. And I'm sure we all want to work for a team that's enthusiastic about making contributions to the team, not feeling burnt out. Again, I get that it's not easy to name everyone, but I really feel some sort of way of recognition could really help to build a culture on our team where each member feels valued and energized to contribute on new projects, if we can find a way to at least get everyone's name listed somewhere. What would you think if…?
   
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   Whew. Sorry for the wall of text. Hope something in there is useful to you, but feel free to ignore if not!
   
   …Also, a disclaimer that this isn't perfect NVC per say, moreso ideas I'm piecing together from various approaches, mostly NVC and Crucial Conversations.
   
   Does anything here resonate for you?
   

You might want to check out https://www.amazon.com/This-Nonviolent-Stuffll-Get-Killed/dp/082236123X - its about the broader MLK idea of nonviolent resistance rather than MR's work but it does address how even King's movement etc was in reality backed up by the ability and willingness to meet force with force.

>> Visiting Martin Luther King Jr. during the Montgomery, Alabama, bus boycott, journalist William Worthy almost sat on a loaded pistol. "Just for self-defense," King assured him. It was not the only weapon King kept for such a purpose; one of his advisors remembered the reverend’s Montgomery, Alabama, home as "an arsenal."

is this the book?

https://www.amazon.com/Magic-Show-Heather-Schlessman-ebook/dp/B07SB4HNWL/