Best products from r/SexWorkers

Part 1:


"Im going to list things that have bothered me in my experiences with providers. Warning, If you're a sex worker, some of these may trigger you."


Well this will get everyone's attention even if we could have predicted most of what this was going to focus on. Okay, I'll bite here without biting your head off.

​

"Sex workers that over value themselves. This probably has a little to do with location, but where I located, anything over $200 is a scam."


It shouldn't surprise anyone that many of us share the same view of some of our peers but that's to be expected in any profession. "What do you mean Bob is getting paid more than the rest of us? That guy does the same damn job!" LOL

… but really, I have a question. Since this seems to be a price tag based concern for you, what exactly do you think you are paying for (actual dollar amount set aside for the moment)? Seriously, list them because I am sure there are others who would make a similar list.


Example using sneakers/tennis shoes/kicks:


Adidas Futurecraft sneakers on market now. Price: USD $1,237.16 - $2,053.50


There are two ways to look at that shoe and its cost.

(1) All the technology, benefits and scarcity of that shoe and the fact that you have to be a baller with that kind of money to burn to look at something like that and think, "why not? I can afford it and having it will bring me pleasure that something cheaper and more readily available will not, etc, etc" - All these things and more would be true and justify that insane price tag but bottom line, only someone who had that kind of spending power would look at that and consider it, not complain about it. For that person, the purchase isn't out of necessity, it is for 100 other reasons that only someone with that kind of financial health could understand.

​

(2) The other way to look at it is "And it's made out of RECYCLED material? Like, literally, junk I can find anywhere? What kind of BS is this???" …. (note: it IS made out of exactly that. LOL). For folks who can't afford it, they won't see the value in it and will instead see every reason why it is a big rip-off, especially if the thing is well beyond THEIR perceived value of it.


Which brings us to value and perception. The financial value of something is completely irrational and based on perception. Collectibles are a perfect example. What is one man's junk is another man's rare finding for auction at a million times what it cost him when he found it and prepares to sell it to someone else. How can something be worth both $1 and $100,000 dollars at the same time? Perception of value based on the audience who decides it has value to THEM. Here is a site that sells antique and vintage spoons. You read that right, spoons like you eat with. And these are OLD spoons you wouldn't want to eat with and the buyer will never eat with, once purchased. So, kitchen spoons that you can't or won't use are listed here. Now look at their price tags and ask yourself... who determines the value and price of this... and why? These are important questions to think about if you really want to understand market values for anything, and everything.

Antique and Vintage spoons for sale


"So tired of seeing ads that are trying to charge so much because they think they're special. The highest I've personally been asked to pay was $700 for an hour, I just laughed. She was from Cali, so maybe that's normal over there, but not here."


As far as this: "ads that are trying to charge so much because they think they're special" You don't actually know that and are, instead, "mind reading" and projecting your own issues into an assumption based on mind reading. She might do it because she thinks she is special but honestly, there's a lot more to determining the price of something than what we, individually, think of it. I might honestly believe that my vagina is a velvet lined box trimmed in gold filled with coins and gems and therefore, worth a zillion-trillion dollars because it is so rare, exclusive and desirable. And I could ask for that but is it, STILL, only a reflection of me thinking I am so special when someone actually gives me the zillion-trillion dollars that I asked for to get access to it? Pricing anything is a tricky process. Pricing time instead of a physical object you can carry home and keep is even more complicated and most of what makes successful pricing (someone pays you the asking price = success) is not simply making prices up and hoping for the best.

Now, depending on where you live, your statement may or may not be an accurate reflection of your provider market and the surrounding patron economy. Obviously, if you live in Oklahoma and you are asking $500 entry fees - you are going to starve to death. If you ask the same price in Los Angeles, you are going to be homeless after your first month there because you can't even afford your rent. Same amount of money, same outcome (pricing failure), two very different reasons.

Also, sometimes, the rate is higher because there is also a time limit on what is being offered. A pretty, young girl will only be pretty AND young during a really short window of time. The same time she is reproductively able to start a family. Doing one is not compatible with the other. It can be done but there are a lot of sacrificed to be made no matter what decisions you make in life. This is the world of being an adult: choices that require sacrifices of other things. So for someone young AND pretty who is being sought after because of her age (18-25 years old. And don't kid yourself. Everyone is attractive during that time frame, especially to clients with arrested development issues that think women are "too old" after 25), that female, especially, only has a small window of time to work with to make money off it but in the process, she is sacrificing the time necessary to be able to do the necessary researching through normal dating to identify a good candidate to be a life partner and build a family with. Fact: good marriage partners cannot be ordered on Amazon and don't appear because you suddenly decide you want one and the third person you meet at a bar magically becomes "the right one". If only life were that simple. And, fun fact for all you males who are also on vanilla dating sites, your dick is of no benefit to us. Never was. Never will be. If your only interest in a female begins and ends with your dick needs, you aren't worth being with and it doesnt' take many bad dates and boyfriends for females to figure that out. So if you are looking for someone who won't charge you and actually is considerate of your budget and future goals, adjust your approach. You will catch raccoons, not race horses, with fish bait.

So for young, female providers, time doing this is time NOT spent being able to find a good candidate to have and raise children with. (Marrying rich, dirty old men and having their babies as a retirement plan is NOT something I would wish on anyone's offspring. Who needs people like that for parents?)


What does this all mean? It means that some of the cost to bear in appropriate pricing for a provider in this age group was established at the beginning of time for this profession when folks knew that family WAS your insurance policy because there was no medical, life or social security insurance to protect you. Bottom line: part of the high cost is for the things the provider has to sacrifice to be able to do this in the here and now instead of navigating toward a different future. Just because you can't see the additional cost factors doesn't mean they aren't there or valid. Remember, Adidas Futurecraft sneakers start at USD $1,237.16 for a reason and at the end of the day, if you want to get simple about it... it's still just a sneaker.

I wish reddit had a thing that saved posts in case you accidentally close a tab, oh well. This will probably be more coherent than what I had originally written.

I came across that tumblr post months ago, when I was getting back into camming. I actually even shared it on my cam tumblr page -- thanks for sharing it, I would have had to comb back through my posts to find it again. Portions of it are obviously dramatized, but I’m sure there is some truth in it. Any industry can be horrible to work in, especially something so physically demanding. The post helped shape some of the decisions I have made regarding what I am and am not comfortable with doing, and whether or not I want to risk losing customers for being outspoken and encouraging critical thinking about porn and how you get sexual satisfaction. I actually think I make more money for it / it makes cam work significantly less exhausting. But camming is different than porn, it is based significantly more on your individual personality.

The post cites Gail Dines. The other day I watched a couple of her lectures, after seeing her name in an academic paper on what it's like to be a female porn scholar -- How Did You Get Into This?: Notes from a Female Porn Scholar by Laura Helen Marks. Her anti-porn stance seems to be more of a venue to discuss anti-capitalist sentiments. I like how Melrose Gia Grant says she is anti-sex work, but pro-sex worker rights. At the heart of it, I feel much of the work we have to do to live and eat and have shelter over our heads is explotation, and that all explotation should be fought against. So, in some ways I agree with Gail Dines, and I think the arguments she makes are valuable, but she does not seem to have concern for the actual experience of sex workers and exploring what sex workers want / need. Bringing down porn will not bring down capitalism and the patriarchy.

It also cites Shelley Lubben. I imagine this is where the most extraordinary material in the post comes from. I read two posts on the site -- one that disregarded the ability of those who work in the porn industry to make their own decisions as they are too “damaged” to take responsibility for themselves, and another that was written by a girl who was “saved” by Shelley Lubben after a history of abuse lead her to consider working in the porn industry. But nope -- Shelley swooped in just in time! At the end of the post is a link encouraging you to donate to the Pink Cross Foundation, a “charity” that saves people from the porn industry. Googling “Pink Cross Foundation criticism” reveals that it is likely that it is more of a cultish cash grab thriving on dramatization than a charity (surprise). Definitely a part of the rescue industry, and reminded me of Magdalen Laundries -- workhouses / cites of slavery for “fallen women”, because slavery is better than prostitution (right?). Although there are no Magdalen Laundries, there are still loads of rescue organizations who are set out to get women out of sex work and often into the textile industry instead.

Sex at the Margins: Migration, Labour Markets and the Rescue Industry by Laura Maria Agustin will probably be another good resource for me, I think I’ll pick it up when I get a bit of extra cash. Reviews say it has good data.

Although I am expressing criticisms of the tumblr post, all of this is very interesting and helpful and the more I read and link things together, the more possible areas of exploration I find. It’s definitely helping me hone in on what areas of sex work I find interesting + feel I can create critical work on.

It is so interesting that such a huge, profitable industry is has such convoluted data.

Thanks as well for your other links, I've taken a look at them and saved them to a notepad.

For appointments, I recommend getting a slashproof bag with locking cable. Once you've received the cash, test it for counterfeits. Then put it (and other valuables) in the bag, and lock the bag to the plumbing under the bathroom sink.

For traveling between locations, use a money belt or a stash bra. I recommend keeping a decoy wallet with some cash and expired cards in it, so that if you are mugged, you can give them your decoy, while keeping the rest of your cash safe.

For storing cash at home, I'd make one or more "pipesafes" with some black iron pipe. Wrap and band the cash, then put it in a fire resistant bag. Then put it in the pipe, and plug the pipe with a pair of "test plugs". You can see what I mean at this instructable for making a survival cache with PVC pipe.

I recommend using black iron pipe instead of PVC because it provides some fire resistance, but you can use PVC pipe instead. You can find black iron pipe at hardware stores, and "test plugs" can be ordered online or purchased through plumbing supply stores.

Split up your money among several "pipesafes" in different locations around your apartment. That way, if you're ever robbed, the thieves may find some of your money, but they probably won't find all of your money. The best places to hide your pipesafes will vary from location to location, so you'll want to size them to fit in your preferred hiding spaces.

Be sure to write down your pipesafe locations somewhere! You will forget where they are!
I recommend storing them as a note in bitwarden, then give your bitwarden account info to a trusted friend or relative. That way, if you die or get sick/injured, your loved ones can find them and access your funds.

Why not a safe, you might ask? A safe can also work. However, thieves know to look for safes. If the safe is portable, they can just tear it out of the wall and walk out with it.

If the safe is heavy enough to prevent easy transport, then it will be a pain the butt for you to move as well. Most sex workers are young, and move or travel frequently. Pipesafes can be moved relatively easily. Plus, you could leave them behind if need be, as they're not that expensive to make.

How much cash should you keep on hand? That will vary depending on your circumstances and risk tolerance.

Personally, I would first build up a cash emergency fund of about $5 K for unexpected expenses, like car repair, "get out of dodge money" (stalker, legal action), medical bills, etc. Top up this fund as you make payouts from it.

Next, I would pre-pay a $5 K retainer with criminal defense attorney who has successfully defended a number of sex work cases. If you're ever in legal trouble, the cops may freeze your assets, making it difficult to hire someone to defend you. Prostitution / solicitation cases cost between $5 - $25 K to defend, so pre-paying at least enough to get started is a good idea.

Eventually, however, you'll probably want to deposit much of your cash in a bank account. If you ever want to purchase a house or car, having an established history of regular cashflow will be necessary. A bank account also makes it much easier to interface with the rest of the financial system.

However, any funds you deposit will become known to the IRS. So you should expect to pay taxes on those funds. You'll need to set aside around 30% of those funds for tax payments.

As an anti-money laundering and anti-tax avoidance measure, banks are required to report cash deposits / withdrawals (called a Cash Transaction Report for CTR) greater than $10000 to the government. Most banks have systems that send these reports automatically, electronically, along with your tax information.

Bank staff can optionally flag and any cash transaction as "suspicious", known as a Suspicious Activity Report (SAR). For example, they might flag a deposit as "suspicious" if they think it was artificially structured to avoid the reporting requirement. (For example, making four deposits of $2499 in a 24 hour period might cause them to make a SAR.)

Due to previous government crackdowns on politically unpopular groups (gun dealers, payday loan vendors, sex workers), banks and other financial institutions are particularly skittish about providing services to sex workers.

So, if you suddenly start making a lot of cash deposits, the bank will likely ask you the source of your funds. If you don't have a good answer, they may close your account. So, be sure to have a plausible story for the source of the cash before you start making significant deposits.

Brokerages, currency exchanges, precious metals dealers and other financial institutions have similar Know Your Customer / Anti-Money Laundering regulations.

woowoo nuru session is one of my favorite! lol

so so so will break down some basics!

1. as /u/sunniyellowscarf say gel may eventually get sticky and gross. this because water gel ratio mix off and room too cold. first must use enough hot water mixing with gel for proper ratio. second must start session freshly showered and not dried off (start session wet from shower). lastly turn up heat in room both bodies should be sweating because nori stay activated with humidity (shower steam) and sweat.
   
2. use rubber sheet or inflatable mattress just for nuru. personally i love exxxtreme sheet i link.....super easy cleanup and kingsize bed so much more fun romping around lots of space.
   
3. cleanup! have half dozen beach towel ready for cleanup. always always always wipe nuru off with large dry towel first. nuru reactivate with any moisture so using wet towel for cleanup just spread mess around. towel yourself off first and towel client off and while client in shower towel sheet off. sheet now completely dry in less than minute and can strip bed put sheet in machine wash. personally i hang dry have never used dryer but my apartment have large balcony can hang sheet over balcony rail for air dry. outcall.....sheet totally dry once towel off so fold into carry bag and wash later.
   
4. contact! treat nuru session as happy ending massage not penetrative sex. body slide or body rub obviously make contact with penis but no penetrative sex or "stripper slide" or vaginal contact. during slide will contact penis with breasts and other "crevice" like armpit or between thighs or between calves but always preventing actual vaginal contact.
   
5. penetrative sex only done after nuru slide over!
   
6. condoms! is safe for penetrative intercourse after nuru as long care taken before pull out condom for sex. wipe hands dry with towel and wipe client penis and crotch dry with towel. never never wash because water just reactive nuru make even more slippery! dry nuru residue okay but must be dry residue. put on condom as normal and dry nuru residue create almost gluelike seal of condom on penis. have never had condom slide off as long as area dry before roll on condom.
   
7. penetrative sex okay even with wet nuru on sheet and other part of body just be aware.....continuing nuru slide with condom on may work wet nuru gel under base of condom which may slowly work way up shaft.....which may lubricate condom inside enough slide off. so this why i say.....body slide first then penetrative sex as separate finale of session.
   
8. if client cum during nuru slide.....do not take chance with condom for second go until both have had full shower. but even if nuru dry on bed during shower is okay. steam from shower and wet bodies and sweat reactive nuru residue on rubber sheet so will get slippery again as soon as hop back on bed.
   
9. my favorite mr. nori's pink nuru and mix with hot water in large bowl (or ice bucket for outcall lol). but yesterday i notice mr. nori's web site and youtube channel disappear. i make post on /r/sextoys asking if anyone know what happen with mr. nori's.
   

• /r/SexToys/comments/7fg8hj/what_happen_to_mr_noris_nuru_gel_web_site_and/
  
  so.....uhhhhh.....hope that help! lol any other question just ask!

Also this is an amazing book written by a sw on amazon... check it out!

How I Made $10,000 A Month As A... https://www.amazon.com/dp/1976986125?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share

Amberly Rothfield breaks down how started in the phone sex industry and began making $10,000 a month consistently talking dirty on the phone. Using such websites as Niteflirt, IWantPhone and the famous Clips4Sale, Amberly became one of the top fetish content producers as well as phone sex operators in a matter of just a year with her innovative take on marketing where others in the field were not. While the book does not guarantee success, it is the first of it's kind to offer a blueprint on how to leverage popular websites to create a lucrative work from home business that is not a scam. Detailing not only how to make phone sex sound effects, Amberly talks about how to use adult friendly websites such as Twitter, Tumblr and even Medium.com to create content that will attract new clients to a budding phone sex business. Working independently sound too scary for you? Amberly also discusses how to join in already established phone sex companies. Tips ranging from newbie to experienced dirty talker, Amberly helps perfect those who take this industry seriously. The biggest take away is learning that the phone sex industry has evolved far from it's early 1990s days. Amberly shows how you can develop offline sales and not solely rely on the money from a phone that is ringing. Building sales funnels and applying business principals that few would think could ever apply. No you do not need a four year college degree as it is all laid out in an easy to digest format.

Oh my. That´s just insane to pay something like that! Nobody needs something like that. This isn´t like we are flying to space, or if it is, I´ve missed something. Rather than pay thousands, get this book. Cheaper and better advices. https://www.amazon.com/Thriving-Sex-Work-Heartfelt-Industry-ebook/dp/B071SKH43M

amanda brooks has a good rep.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Internet-Escorts-Handbook-Book/dp/0978094409

Many Cam is a great one.

Here is a cheap light system...
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B018KE5XUO/ref=sspa_mw_detail_3?psc=1

Also don’t use a built in webcam. They are crap and customers won’t watch. Most girls stream in HD.