(Part 2) Best products from r/TwoXChromosomes
We found 91 comments on r/TwoXChromosomes discussing the most recommended products. We ran sentiment analysis on each of these comments to determine how redditors feel about different products. We found 2,831 products and ranked them based on the amount of positive reactions they received. Here are the products ranked 21-40. You can also go back to the previous section.
21. Whipping Girl: A Transsexual Woman on Sexism and the Scapegoating of Femininity
- Used Book in Good Condition
Features:
23. LELO Gigi Personal Massager, Deep Rose
- Ultra moisturizing
- Paraben free
- Glycerin free
- Fragrance free
- Long lasting
Features:
24. Braun Silk-épil Bikini Trimmer Electric Shaver, Styler, and Hair Removal Tool for Women, FG1100, pink and gray
- Ultra precision: for detailed styling in the bikini zone use the high precision head.
- Shape your bikini zone: the slim bikini shaping head is designed for shaving precise lines, shapes or contours.
- Smooth bikini zone: 2 trimming combs (5mm and 8mm) are ideal for trimming hairs to a uniform length.
- Eyebrow shaping: use the high precision head also for styling your eyebrows.
Features:
25. Cunt: A Declaration of Independence Expanded and Updated Second Edition
- Seal Press CA
Features:
26. Coming Apart: Why Relationships End and How to Live Through the Ending of Yours
- Used Book in Good Condition
Features:
27. Taking Charge of Your Fertility: The Definitive Guide to Natural Birth Control, Pregnancy Achievement, and Reproductive Health (Revised Edition)
Having a baby
28. Taking Charge of Your Fertility, 20th Anniversary Edition: The Definitive Guide to Natural Birth Control, Pregnancy Achievement, and Reproductive Health
- World's Funnest, Cutest Lifestyle Action Camera in Tiny Cubic Package. Not Wi-Fi compatible.
- 6MP CMOS Sensor for Crisp Images; Selectable 720p or 1080p Video Rate
- 124-Degree Wide-Angle Lens Effortlessly Captures Big, Vibrant Scenes
- Built-In Rechargeable Battery Records 90 Continuous Minutes Per Charge
- Mounts Magnetically or w/Clip for a World of Exciting Action Applications
Features:
30. The "What's Happening to My Body" Book for Girls, Revised Third Edition
- Riflescope offers robust feature set for the price; Coated optics provide bright, high contrast images; Fully coated optics, waterproof, fog proof & recoil proof
- 1/4 MOA sure grip audible click windage and elevation adjustments
- Proprietary true zero windage and elevation adjustment system stays locked to 0 through strenuous conditions; QTA eyepiece enables easy target acquisition
- 3 9X magnification and 50 millimeter objective lens; 31.4 foot field of view at 100 yards at 3X and 10.5 foot field of view at 100 yards at 9X
- 3.75 inch eye relief, 16.6 to 5.6 millimeter exit pupil, 13.2 ounce weight, and 60 inch adjustment range at 100 yards
Features:
32. The Clitoral Truth: The Secret World at Your Fingertips
- Used Book in Good Condition
Features:
33. Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
- Great product!
Features:
35. Bobbi Brown Makeup Manual: For Everyone from Beginner to Pro
- make up
- cosmetics
Features:
36. Softdisc Menstrual Disc - Softcup - 14 Discs - Cleaner Disposable Model of Reusable Silicone Cups, Period Cup, Tampon - Women w/Heavy or Sensitive Flow - 1 Size Model - Small, Medium, or Large Fit
- DESIGNED FOR YOUR BODY: Softdisc is the result of 10 years of Research and Development by scientists. It is hypoallergenic, made without BPA, phthalates, or latex. It is also the only internally-worn product that is not linked to TSS.
- FOR HEAVY OR LIGHT PERIODS: Use menstrual soft rings instead of tampons, pads, and menstrual cups. Unlike other products, one size fits women of all ages and sizes. Softdisc holds 5 tampons worth of fluid and is the preferred choice for heavy or light periods.
- COMFORTABLE: Softdisc is the most comfortable period product on the market. It prevents menstrual odor, irritation, and dryness. Most women cannot feel Softcup at all once inserted. Softdisc is easy to change, remove and dispose of on the go.
- LEAK PREVENTION: Softdisc prevents leaks overnight, during exercise, while swimming, and even during sex during menstruation. Softdisc creates a comfortable seal at the base of the cervix which leaves you worry-free during all of life's activities.
Features:
37. Humco Boric Acid Powder, 6 oz.
- Many household uses
- Meets NF standards
- Boric Acid Powder NF 6oz
Features:
38. Mini Halo,"The Original" Compact Power Wand Massager, Wireless, 20X Multi-Speed Vibrations (Black)
Usb Rechargeable20x pulsations100% water resistantHigh-grade silicone cushioned massage head
40. Plan B One-Step Emergency Contraceptive, 1.5 Mg (1 Tablet)
The #1 OB/GYN recommended brand of emergency contraceptionEasy to find in the family planning aisle of many retail stores—without a prescription or ID and with no age restrictionChosen by millions of womenIt should not be used as regular birth controlOnly product shipped & sold by Amazon guarantee...
I'm stealing another redditor's format to make it easier for you to find the useful information in this ramble...haha
DRESS:If you are a small enough size, try looking in the kids'/juniors' section - no joke. My friend only just breaks 5', and she found a really pretty white dress that was a fraction of the price of adult dresses.
Dress shopping is hard :( It's worth finding out about your body type to help narrow your options. When your arms are relaxed at your waist, are your elbows below your natural waist (the smallest circumference of your waist)? If you said yes, then congratulations, you're short-waisted like me and cheap dress shopping will be a bitch because everything cheap is catered to long-waisted women (elbows are above natural waist). If you are short-waisted, for instance, babydoll styles look silly, but empress waistlines/dresses that ruche at the side or wrap around are flattering. If you're long-waisted, I think you can rock a wider variety of styles.
It may be a worth a spin by Ross, Filene's Basement, or the like - often, you can find decent, cheap stuff there.
MAKEUP:For makeup, many people get makeovers from the counters at malls (Bobbi Brown does the most natural-looking jobs). Sometimes these are free, and sometimes they do this with the understanding that you will buy one or two items afterwards. This can cost $30 and up in products, though, so do your research and see who will do it for free. I think the Body Shop does free makeup, although it'll be their mineral-y powerstuffs which don't augment as much as other kinds of makeup would. I, personally, prefer Bobbi Brown because you exit looking like a slightly prettier normal person, and you get some high quality products you can use for the next year (if you wear makeup as infrequently as I do, haha. Actually, I may still have products I bought for prom makeup four years ago).
By the way, Bobbi Brown has some books on beauty that I still refer to - here and here, although this might be most helpful for you if you decide to do your own makeup. The InStyle Secrets of Style books are also like DIY manuals for fashion/style/life in general. You could also check out the blog Already Pretty, although I don't remember if there are many prom-appropriate articles. They do have a lot of confidence-boosting articles, though, and confidence is important for any social event! They also have some stuff on finding the right clothes for your body type, which could help with dress shopping.
EVENT: The event varies from place to place. Mine was a dance in a large hotel hall that came with a seated dinner buffet and dessert buffet. It was chaperoned by teachers. The deejay did a bit of challenging girls vs. boys to dance, but nothing with plastic inflatable goods. He played mostly top 40 songs, and then some songs we had requested (e.g. "Don't Stop Believing" was our prom song). There wasn't a lot of grinding at our school because the clothes were generally too restrictive and the girls were wearing heels, haha. I doubt you'll feel pressured into doing that; some people are totally happy just sitting and talking and eating for the whole time, if those are options for you.
Above all, have a great time! Everyone's nervous, but it is so much fun to see everyone all dolled up - especially the dudes forced into tuxes. Bring a camera and you'll always have something to do :) Best of luck!
Oh man, where to start... I don't even know how many toys I have anymore. I went from being a didn't-own-any-toys girl to a husband-buys-me-a-new-toy-for-every-holiday girl (it turns out that, if you're really looking, there are a lot of holidays).
Hmmm here are some of my favorites, with links to Amazon if you wanna read reviews 'n stuff.
Seems like you're in the market for a vibrator so I'll just stick to that... don't even get me started in dildos and plugs! :)
I know some of these have already been mentioned, so just consider this a second vote for those titles. Also, my list skews heavily towards sci-fi/fantasy, because that is what I tend to read the most of.
By women, featuring female protagonists:
The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood
Kindred by Octavia E. Butler
The Female Man by Joanna Russ
Kushiel's Dart by Jacqueline Carey
Lavinia by Ursula K. Le Guin
The Circus in Winter by Cathy Day (It's not entirely fair to characterize this as a book about women; it's really a set of interconnected stories featuring both male and female characters. On the other hand, many of the most memorable characters, IMO, are women, so I'm filing it in this category anyway. So there!)
The Protector of the Small Quartet by Tamora Pierce, beginning with First Test (Really, anything by Tamora Pierce would fit the bill here. They're young adult novels, so they're quick reads, but they're enjoyable and have wonderful, strong, realistic female protagonists.)
These Old Shades by Georgette Heyer (Heyer wrote really fun, enjoyable romances, typically set in the Regency period, though These Old Shades is actually Georgian. This one is probably my favorite, but they're really all quite wonderful. Not super heavy stuff, but don't write her off just because of the subject matter. She was a talented, witty writer, and her female protagonists are almost never the wilting "damsel in distress" type - they're great characters who, while still holding true to their own time and place, are bright and likeable and hold their own against the men in their lives.)
A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle (Another young adult book. And, again, I think it's worth noting that L'Engle's books almost always feature strong and interesting female characters. This one is probably her most famous, and begins a series featuring members of the same family, so it's a good jumping off point.)
Persepolis by Marjane Satrapi
By men, featuring female protagonists:
The Last Unicorn by Peter S. Beagle (This is another one that is perhaps not a perfect fit for this category; the titular unicorn is female, but the book is as much about Schmendrick the magician as it is about her. However, there's also Molly Grue, so on the strength of those two women, I'm classifying this book as having female protagonists.)
The Book Thief by Markus Zusak
Coraline by Neil Gaiman (It's a children's book, but there's plenty to enjoy about it as an adult, too.)
By women, featuring male protagonists
Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell by Susanna Clarke
The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin
> Removing the clitoris removes all pleasure sensations
> a woman who has her clitoris and labia removed will not experience pleasure at all from her sexual organs.
Nope.
Note: I am against ALL genital mutilation of females, males and intersex. Please don't interpret this post as supporting any of these activities.
Everything I have posted below is factual; but it's supposed to be educational - to help folks clear up their confused thinking around this issue. Thanks
Genital Autonomy for all - Intersex, Male & Female
If the amputation of the mucus membranes of the male genitals results in a lowering of HIV infection; then it would not be unreasonable to assume that the amputation of the mucus membranes of the female genitals would produce the same effect. Indeed, as the total surface area of mucus membranes in females is so much greater than that of males, the effect may be even greater.
However, most western peoples will be repulsed by the idea of amputating parts of an infant female's genitals to obtain some future protection from a disease. All the more so, when nearly 100% protection can be obtain from HIV infection by use of condoms.
But this repulsion does not arise when the prospect of amputating parts of infant male genitals. This is clearly because such activity has become "normalised" in the west. This is the issue.
Like male circumcision, there are plenty of peer reviewed studies that show female circumcision is not a barrier to sexual orgasm and enjoyment. Some studies show that orgasm and enjoyment are reduced; and some show no effect.
You'll often come across members of the medical community saying that FGM has no "health" benefits, and if women have their clitoris amputated, then their sex life comes to an end. Then they say that MGM has lots of "health" benefits and that men's sex life is not affected.
But it's a myth that many women who have suffered FGM are unhappy and cannot have great sex lives. That's why they queue up to have their daughters' circumcised. Plus there are many so-called potential "health benefits" - such as a 50% reduction in HIV/AIDS.
The visible part - the glans clitoris - is only a small part of the whole clitoris. So when a woman suffers partial or total amputation of the external clitoris when undergoing FGM, only a small part of her clitoris is removed. Thus she often can enjoy a full and satisfying sex life.
The truth about the female clitoris
Learn how large the female clitoris is; and how the external glans clitoris is just a small part of it:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/08/28/cliteracy_n_3823983.html
http://womenshealth.about.com/cs/sexuality/a/clitoraltruthin.htm
http://www.amazon.com/The-Clitoral-Truth-Secret-Fingertips/dp/1583224734
Female Circumcision & Health Benefits
"Stallings et al. (2005) reported that, in Tanzanian women,
the risk of HIV among women who had undergone FGC
was roughly half that of women who had not; the association
remained significant after adjusting for region, household
wealth, age, lifetime partners, union status, and recent ulcer."
Note: when it's found that circumcising female genitals reduces HIV/AIDS it's called a "conundrum" rather that a wonderfully exciting "medical" opportunity to reduces HIV/AIDS.
http://www.iasociety.org/Default.aspx?pageId=11&abstractId=2177677
"Georgia State University, Public Health Theses" — a USA University of international renown:
The Association between Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) and the Risk of HIV/AIDS in Kenyan Girls and Women (15-49 Years):
"RESULTS: This study shows an inverse association (OR=0.508; 95% CI: 0.376-0.687) between FGM and HIV/AIDS, after adjusting for confounding variables."
"DISCUSSION: The inverse association between FGM and HIV/AIDS established in this study suggests a possible protective effect of female circumcision against HIV/AIDS. This finding suggests therefore the need to authenticate this inverse association in different populations and also to determine the mechanisms for the observed association."
"This study investigated whether there is a direct association between FGM and HIV/AIDS. Surprisingly, the results indicated that the practice of FGM turned out to reduce the risk of HIV. While a positive association was hypothesized, a surprising inverse association between cases of female circumcision and positive HIV serostatus was obtained, hence indicating that FGM may have protective properties against the transmission of HIV."
http://scholarworks.gsu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1113&context=iph_theses
"National Bureau of Statistics, Tanzania - 50% reduction in HIV/AIDS in women who have have parts of the genitals amputated:"
http://www.tzonline.org/pdf/femalecircumcisionandhivinfectionintanzania.pdf
"International Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology" — a peer reviewed journal of international renown:
Female genital cutting in this group of women did not attenuate sexual feelings:
http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1471-0528.2002.01550.x/abstract
"The Journal of Sexual Medicine" — a peer reviewed journal of international renown:
Pleasure and orgasm in women with Female Genital Mutilation/Cutting (FGM/C):
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17970975
"The New Scientist" (references a medical journal)
Female Circumcision Does Not Reduce Sexual Activity:
http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn2837-female-circumcision-does-not-reduce-sexual-activity.html#.Uml2H2RDtOQ
"Journal of General Internal Medicine" — a peer reviewed journal of international renown:
Female "Circumcision" - African Women Confront American Medicine
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1497147/
Medical benefits of female circumcision: Dr. Haamid al-Ghawaabi
http://islamqa.info/en/ref/45528
"Pediatrics (AAP)" — a peer reviewed journal of international renown:
Genital Cutting Advocated By American Academy Of Pediatrics
http://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/102/1/153.short
Genital Autonomy for all - Intersex, Male & Female
Yay, good for you! It’s so hard to make choices about our bodies without knowledge and it’s so frustrating when people around us won’t talk about it or only use euphemisms or whatever. Happy for your future daughter :)
FYI, there is another option that for me has been even better than tampons and I wish someone had told me about earlier. Menstrual cups (like diva cup, Lena, etc) are reusable silicone cups that you insert and they catch the blood, then you dump it into the toilet. It sounded super gross to me at first, but it’s not actually that different from using tampons in terms of how much blood you touch and see and everything. They last like 10 years and only cost around $40, you boil them to sterilize in between periods. They are way cheaper than tampons in the long run, and safer (no bleach/chemicals, for one), and you can go twice as long without changing it because it can hold more blood. For me it’s also way more comfortable and easier once I got over the hill of learning how to use it. An idea for the future!
I also want to offer some perspective on hormonal birth control because, again, I wish someone had told me. It can change your body and periods in awesome ways in the moment (help with cramping, decrease heaviness of flow, etc) but in the long run your body can suffer aftershocks from it that you might not anticipate. After being on it for a decade I stopped and my skin is terrible now. Also, I was so out of touch with what a real period was like for me because I was having pill periods that I feel like I didn’t know my body well enough to know what was healthy especially when dealing with pregnancy and postpartum and nursing. I won’t go back to hormonal methods. Not that it won’t be right for you, but just another perspective because all I ever heard was that it was totally fine and super safe with no lasting effects.
Last, if you’re looking for information about your body you might want to read Our Bodies, Ourselves. It’s going out of print but it’s an amazing book by women for women about women’s bodies and health needs. If nobody is talking to you about this stuff, you should definitely get this book!
My ex did this as well. We were both 21. After 3 years, he thinks "relationships are too much work." We talk and decide that he probably fell out of love with me. He insisted he wasn't leaving me for anyone else. He promised it was about relationships, not about me. He was my best friend, and I trusted him. We had talked about marriage, kids, living together, etc. The whole shebang. And it ended somewhat randomly.
Well, about a week later, he was dating the girl that he had been cheating on me with for about a month. That was the beginning of June. Now, they're moving in together. They've known each other 3 months.
Am I still upset? Sure, sometimes. Do I realize that he wasn't the one for me? Yes. Do I realize it wasn't about her? Yes. It's not a reflection on anyone but him. He wanted something new and exciting. Did he find it? I'm sure he did. I hope she's everything he wanted.
Before getting here, I had to go through all of the stages of grief. I had to realize that the guy who I thought was perfect for me wasn't. I had to realize that this didn't mean I'd never be loved again. I had to realize that what he offered is not necessarily what I really want. It took a lot of time, but I'm in a healthy place. I would suggest reading Coming Apart: Why Relationships End and How to Live Through the Ending of Yours. It gives you a lot of tools for understanding and working through what you're feeling.
What you're feeling right now is totally normal. This man represented a lot of things to you, and you're going to miss them for a while. A sense of security. A reminder of how you became who you are today. A feeling of belonging. You can and will find these things elsewhere. Rely on your friends. Stay busy. Get active.
I know it will be hard, but you will get through this. Don't hold out hope for him coming crawling back to you. He might, or he might not. You need to live your life for you right now. Breakups are a wonderful opportunity. You grow more alone than you do in a relationship, oftentimes. Use this to your advantage.
Good luck.
I have pretty sensitive skin so I haven't found much success with shaving. I've tried all kinds of tips (sharp razor, warm washcloth, good shave cream, deodorant afterwards, etc.) and I still get bad ingrowns or redness afterwards. So now I sometimes wax and typically trim. Waxing is really good at getting all the hair, but it's expensive ($60 for full brazilian) so for me at least it's not a good long term option. I used to use one of those Norelco mini trimmers for ear/nose hair but it was somewhat small so I recently got the Braun Silk Epil Bikini Styler and I'm really happy with it. The trimmer is a better size/angle to get all the hair. I tend to use one of the attachments for the "mound" area and the main trimmer by itself for the bikini line area which gets the hair super short (like a cm or so). If you really want to get rid of 90% of the hair, the trimmer w/ no attachments should do that. One major reason I switched to the trimmer was because even though it does remove most of the hair, I've never had any irritation from it. If you want perfect long-term removal a wax may be best, but I find the trimmer a good solution in the long term.
I'm a writer - my debut novel is coming out in a month - and you have to keep in mind that Twilight was written for a specific purpose, for a specific audience at a specific time in their lives. You CAN hold YA urban fantasy up to the same light that you hold an adult book, but you'll find a lot of themes inherent in Stephanie Meyer's books run throughout YA. Younger girls might want to grow up and be like the most kickass characters, but there is an underlying current of confusion and lust that runs through her books that is intended to mirror that cocktail of emotions we all go through as teenagers.
Don't get me wrong - I think the fact that Stephanie Meyer plucked Bella and Edward straight from a steamy dream says a lot about the base of the character itself. However you'll be hard pressed to find a YA urban fantasy female protagonist that is not (in some way) oriented around the men in her life. It's just part of the genre. In that way children's books actually have it MUCH easier. Since sexuality isn't really a part of it, you can give a character a couple of lines that lightly touch on kissing or hugging or emotions - hint at it but no more - and then move on (I'm specifically thinking of Ginny and Harry's relationship here) but the YA audience and SPECIFICALLY YA publishers, want to see more romance, because that's what sells to teenage girls.
I've actually had my agent and editors request that I put MORE romance in my books because they weren't "intense or steamy" enough and I like to use the "fade to black" method when broaching physical subjects.
White male desires in US media get precedence over anything else. For the most part they are the ones in executive positions presiding over popular media such as television shows and movies. I think you can probably find some more diversity in literature if you know where to look. I'm not sure if you're into fantasy, but Kushiel's Dart is a good look at a woman who uses her sexuality in a way that serves the plot, the character, and can be sexy. No male gaze BS.
Also do some research for erotica or adult literature written by women. You'll find much more interesting things regarding sexuality from a woman's POV. Also lesbian porn is probably the closest you can get to seeing women actually enjoy another partner sexually pleasing them, rather than some gnarly-looking dude smashing his dick in her vagina, then cumming all over her face. Of course a lot of lesbian porn is made for straight guys, so be careful of that.
I agree with you, though. There needs to be more media that shows how healthy and happy sexuality can be for women, and how it's not just about trying to get a guy off. I think as time goes on things are getting more progressive, though!
I relish (and sometimes revile) certain sounds as well. I probably never would have liked the word cunt were it not for the imagery of this particular poem, quite frankly. I'm one of those people who has hang-ups about the mouth-feel of certain words (can't stand the way "panties" feels as it is articulated), and I think my studies of phonemes and articulators in my degree program (Speech and Hearing Science) only deepened this tendency. So I definitely understand where you are coming from on this. I've hear the Louie C.K. bit before and I do enjoy it! (There's quite a bit of his stuff that I like.)
I've been told I cuss like a sailor at times. I think it's because of what I held in at work (career with kids).
The poetry anthology is Claiming the Spirit Within and I'll go so far as to say it's worth more than what Amazon is hawking it for these days. Also, with regard to "cunt," there's a book by the same name. If you haven't read it, it's an interesting read. I can't say I agreed with it in its entirety, but it did get my gears turning and introduce some different perspectives in feminism to me.
With regard to medical terms, YES, there are some great ones out there. Although I find some disease names to be excessively impenetrable (particularly some of the spinal conditions which seem to be so similarly named and yet have such long names that it would be a bear to memorize them correctly ... thank goodness for reference materials).
I totally sympathize! With my latest ex, I started getting yeast infections almost every time we had sex. It was horrible! He'd had a male yeast infection before we met, so I think maybe he was carrying some strain that threw my internal balance into chaos.
I tried all sorts of remedies, but the only thing that touched it was boric acid. There are some good instructions on this website. This is one of those old folk remedies that actually works quite well, and it not dangerous as long as you don't use it on broken skin or during your period. As the article says, DO NOT TAKE BY MOUTH. It is to be used as a suppository only!!!
I bought this powder and some 00 capsules. Insert a capsule right before bed so you're laying flat and everything tends to stay inside. Wear a light pad, because there may be some extra clear fluid in the morning. Not much, just your vagina's mucus membranes responding what's going on, and the melted capsule remains may also come out, though sometimes those seem to absorb or melt into everything else.
Best of luck, and I genuinely hope you find a solution soon.
It might be helpful to check out some Al Anon meetings in your area. Without getting into it too much, the behavior patterns a person often creates when they live and love someone with dependency can be detrimental and a barrier to growth within and beyond that relationship. Learning more about how his alcoholism and behaviors have affected you and recovering from that yourself can be a great step toward healing. Also, this book might be really helpful. http://www.amazon.com/Codependent-No-More-Controlling-Yourself/dp/0894864025 Good luck with your journey.
I know you asked for tampon brand suggestions, but I'd also like to suggest getting a menstrual cup once you get used to tampons. They can be reused indefinitely (meaning you save thousands of dollars over a lifetime), they hold more fluid than tampons, there's no environmental waste, and they're healthier for your body. Of course, there's a learning curve, so you might need to wait until you're able to take the time to learn to use a brand like the DivaCup. However, there are also Instead Softcups, which seem similar to tampons in some ways.
I will probably get downvoted by some people for talking about cups in a post about tampons, but I just want to make sure you know all your options to help you out in the future. I'm certainly glad I found out about cups!
You said you're looking for something like a modern "Feminine Mystique," but I'm not sure what that means as regards sexuality. The Feminine Mystique didn't have a ton to say about sexuality and is rather dry.
I'd rather recommend a body-positive guide to sexuality like the classic Our Bodies, Ourselves. or The Joy of Sex: Ultimate Revised Edition. (Be sure it's the revised edition; the older edition of Joy of Sex is written from a male perspective and largely ignores the female perspective.)
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Cunt-Declaration-Independence-Live-Girls/dp/1580050751
This book is seriously helpful. Even friends reading it in their 30s have been like "Ooooh!" Highly recommend it - don't be put off by the title. Honestly you'll get more out of it than you would ever imagine :) Be gentle with yourself OP.
I commented above, but this is the one I've used for 4+ years so far:
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.amazon.com/Original-Massager-Wireless-Multi-speed-Vibrations/dp/B010GLYPW6&ved=2ahUKEwjtyofo2LTiAhWLqp4KHYtpDkYQFjAAegQIAxAB&usg=AOvVaw3bb888uD-mVVZuwHokq7qM
It is pretty cheap for a vibrator, requires no batteries, comes with a charging cord and drawstring silk pouch, has different vibration intensities and settings, is waterproof (but I don't think it can be completely submerged), and super easy to clean. I went through probably 5 or 6 vibrators before I purchased this one and have never gone back and have never needed to replace it yet.
lots of good tutorials, but honestly, go to sephora or a makeup counter in a department store and ask for help on how to apply. honestly, though, this book is amazing. I accidentally gave it away and i miss it a LOT! http://www.amazon.co.uk/Making-Faces-Kevyn-Aucoin/dp/0316286850/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1377190852&sr=1-1
The STM method is the symptothermal method. For Catholics, it's usually taught through the couple to couple league, but it's also the most popular secular method because it's the one taught in Taking Charge of Your Fertility. If you're interested in learning more about fertility at all, this is the go-to book. This method is based on observing at least 2 primary fertility signs (cervical fluid and basal body temperature) and marking the beginning and ending of the fertile period based on the information gathered. A barrier method, withdrawal, outercourse, or abstinence is used during "Phase 2" of the cycle, which is the period between identifying the beginning of fertility and the end of fertility. The advantages of this method are that you can confirm ovulation, for sure--other than an ultrasound, there isn't really a good way to confirm that ovulation is happening. You can assume that it is based on other fertility signs and LH testing (ovulation predictor kits), but that information doesn't prove that ovulation actually occurred.
The Marquette method is primarily an NFP method, so in order to follow the protocol exactly, they require abstinence during the fertile period. That being said, if you're using it secularly, you can use barrier methods if you understand the risk that you are taking.
Marquette uses the Clearblue Advanced Fertility Monitor to track changing estrogen and LH levels in urine. Based on this information, there's a protocol for determining when your fertile period begins and ends. This is the official Marquette website. Unfortunately there's a paywall to access the forums, which is where they post updated and improved protocol (which is mainly for special circumstances--breastfeeding, postpartum, PCOS, etc).
There are also methods that track only cervical fluid (Billings, Creighton, Justisse), which tends to be very low on the cost and labor intensity scale. I successfully used Billings for awhile, but wanted more concrete information to prepare for trying to conceive in the future (1-2 years down the road).
I saw that but I think my comment still stands. Most people don't stock up on this - they buy it when they need it and this has a short window to be effective. Plus a ton of things that are same-day prime are sold by other companies, but fulfilled by Amazon.
EDIT: Apparently name brand Plan B is available for free 1-day delivery so that's something - http://www.amazon.com/Plan-One-step-Emergency-Contraceptive-Tablet/dp/B00H2D6WUA/ref=sr_1_1?dd=PqO-uYCrrnKOYqTBwvCaXA%2C%2C&ddc_refnmnt=pfod&ie=UTF8&qid=1451868042&sr=8-1&keywords=plan+b&refinements=p_97%3A11292772011
Oh, simple!
These two books are classic and very appropriate for her age. They address both puberty and sex with clear descriptions and accurate terminology. Think of it as something you would explain, like the seasons and the earth tilting on its axis. It doesn't need to be overwhelming or taboo.
You want her to be comfortable coming to you with questions.
My parents read them to me, and I read them to my girls several times over the years.
http://www.amazon.com/Whats-Happening-Me-Guide-Puberty/dp/0818403128
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0818402539/ref=pd_lpo_sbs_dp_ss_2?pf_rd_p=1944687442&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=0818403128&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=1S5348W9H86286M194VT
I just lent our copies to the neighbors. I hope they work well for you!
The Lelo vibrators are AMAZING! I own one and it has a super soft rubber matterial that is awsome feeling. They are a little on the expensive side but they are rechargeable. Here is one that has vaginal and clitoral stimulation http://www.amazon.com/LELO-Luxury-Rabbit-Vibrator-Purple/dp/B005FG92IK/ref=sr_sp-atf_image_1_3?s=hpc&ie=UTF8&qid=1382934564&sr=1-3&keywords=Lelo
This is one the one that I have and love! http://www.amazon.com/LELO-Gigi-Personal-Massager-Deep/dp/B0029ZALBC/ref=sr_sp-atf_title_1_2?s=hpc&ie=UTF8&qid=1382934564&sr=1-2&keywords=Lelo
It's a little expensive, but I heartily recommend the Gigi for the following reasons:
Boric Acid helps with odor, plus it's safe & inexpensive. I've had good experience with it personally. Worth a shot! Also: It's an effective remedy for vaginitis and yeast infections (when used as a vaginal suppository).
P.S. the link is to a brand of Boric Acid I've used.
Check out a book called Cunt: A declaration of Independence. It's a great fun to read, very sex positive and offers a contemporary re-lensing of women's issues.
http://www.amazon.com/Cunt-Declaration-Independence-Expanded-Updated/dp/1580050751
My Dad was the one who told my sister and I about intercourse when I was 8. He sat us down and read us this picture book. I was a little grossed out, but it did not change my feelings about Dad at all!
However, whether she learns about sex or not, your daughter will pull away from you in the next couple years as she goes through puberty. Heck, so will your son later on. That's what teenagers do. It has little to nothing to do with the realization that "my parent's have sex!" and everything to do with just growing up and trying to figure out who they are.
You sound like a caring father with a good relationship wit your daughter. You're relationship might not involve cuddling or wrestling matches as she gets older but there's no reason to think you won't remain close.
Hi there.
Sorry that this is happening to you. I can understand both of your concerns.
I think this book will help you a lot, combined with condoms. You can determine the timespan that you're fertile and avoid sex during that time.
You do have to get to know your body's fertility cues and understand how fertility works, which I think is kind of fun anyway. If you combine this with a condom it would help your chances a lot.
http://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge-Your-Fertility-Anniversary/dp/0062326031/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1458340043&sr=8-1&keywords=taking+control+of+your+fertility
Good luck to you, whatever you decide to do!
Look into this fantasy book series. There, the main character has sex as a job, much like Inara from firefly, as a profession and as a ritual to worship a goddess in the book's lore.
>a healthy, non-monogamous, sexually empowered female
This series has exactly that, and thats one of the many reasons why I love it.
Some of the things, yes - others, no. For example, the sexualization thing, not so much. I highly recommend Serano's book Whipping Girl, which goes into a lot more detail on the subject, but the basic idea is that trans women are hit by two factors at once:
Oppositional sexism affects all GSM people (trans men and women, obviously, as well as bisexuals, who cross over to the "other" side of the chart sexuality-wise, asexuals, who do not conform to "their" side of the chart, gay and lesbian people (who fall into both those categories, in terms of violating the oppositional sexist paradigm), etc.). But then trans women are also affected by traditional sexism, because according to society our birthright is maleness and masculinity, which is (again, according to society) inherently superior to the femaleness and (potentially) femininity that we claim.
I agree with all the comments that say go to sephora. They aren't on commission, sales staff are very helpful at choosing products, and take into account if you're on a budjet.
I also recommend Bobbi Browns books. They are makeup books with lots of pictures and guides, and sections for choosing each to type of makeup, and also advice for caring for your skin. I bought this one, which is all I need
http://www.amazon.ca/Bobbi-Brown-Makeup-Manual-Everyone/dp/0446581348
It sounds like you should read this book.
http://www.amazon.com/Codependent-No-More-Controlling-Yourself/dp/0894864025
From the way you have described, it sounds like you are in relationship were you are invested in making your lives better while your partner leeches a free ride off of you.
I can totally understand your frustrations after being on hormonal birth control for so many years. I think that if you combine condoms with another "awareness" method, you shouldn't have to worry.
I would recommend that you get your hands on this book to educate yourself as much as possible. You might be able to find it for free online somewhere.
Now that you're getting off of the hormonal birth control, you can start to take notice of how your body subtly changes during the month, and better predict your ovulation window. Body temperature is a good indicator, as well as changes in discharge, breast tenderness, sex drive, etc.
Every woman is different, so you will have to figure out your indicators. For me, I always have sharp ovarian pain during my ovulation window, so it's unavoidable that I take notice.
Looks like I'll have something to read come November 15 :) Also, cute author pic!
(psst.. someone explain to me how there can be a used copy of this book for sale when it's released in three weeks?)
A book that deals extensively with this subject ("male" traits being valued more than "female" traits) is Whipping Girl: A Transsexual Woman on Sexism and the Scapegoating of Femininity by Julia Serano. I highly recommend it to everyone, especially my cis-sexual friends.
Yeah, it was around when I was a kid, but my parents got me this nonsense instead...not terrible, but the pictures were weird. I mostly remember a cartoon of a sperm dressed in a top hat and tails, holding flowers, and the description of an orgasm as a very pleasurable sneeze, lol.
Where did I come from?
What's happening to me?
Your fertility varies throughout the month. Some days you have a 0 or near 0 percent chance of becoming pregnant, and some days you have a much higher chance. So, it's impossible to come up with a number that will apply to every sexual encounter you have. It's more practical to come up with a rough yearly average percentage.
I suggest buying a used copy of this book to learn more!!! It is extremely useful for understanding your fertility and your cycles and at $.66 it's information anyone can afford!
I would say from this is the source for most people who follow FAM. It is extremely comprehensive.
http://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge-Your-Fertility-Reproductive/dp/0060937645
This is the website that can accompany the book. I think some people find the forums very useful. http://www.tcoyf.com/
Planned Parenthood and other services that educate about reproductive health will have print materials for learning this service, and there are definitely doctors and other health professionals who educate via workshops etc about this.
I cannot agree enough with this. And no need to be brave. I've been using Softcups with amazing results. The fact that my guy can't even feel it, plus that there's no mess at all, makes us two very happy campers.
Oh, this horribly embarrassing but great book: What's Happening to My Body?
First of all I'm so sorry for everything your mom went through. I wish her joy in her recovery. First book that came to mind https://www.amazon.com/Bodies-Ourselves-Boston-Womens-Collective/dp/1439190666/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1469747967&sr=1-1&keywords=our+bodies+ourselves+2015
Actually we do, soft cups. Like a menstral cup but soft, much much shallower and disposable. https://www.amazon.com/Instead-Softcups-Feminine-Protection-Count/dp/B000X29GY6
Kind of like a diaphragm but meant to collect period blood.
I was given the old version of What's Happening to my Body Book for Girls. It is very long and very clinical and I read the SHIT out of that thing. I plan on giving my daughter an updated version. Some of the info on AIDS etc is outdated now so it wouldn't be right to give my copy to her, though I still own it.
Yeah, take a pregnancy test. If she's not pregnant, then don't be concerned, she likely just had a delayed ovulation. Ovulation can be delayed for a number of reasons, like stress. Your wife (and maybe you) might be interested in reading this book http://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge-Your-Fertility-Reproductive/dp/0060937645
I was amazed at how little I knew about my own body before I read this!!
Browsing /all/new and I saw your post.
My wife was in the same boat as you several years ago and she bought the book Making Faces by Kevyn Aucion and it really helped her out. She's become much more confident in her makeup applying skills with it! Check out some of the reviews, it's highly recommended.
May I introduce you all to Softcups?! Disposable (I wash out and reuse sometimes) 8hr flexible cups like the mooncup, but you can totally get it on with em! I find I have way less cramping with them, and sometimes forget I have my period (and I don't have light ones either). Just trying to help some ladies out! My SO doesn't even notice them, sometimes I don't even tell him!
cunt is a great book
Incase you are interested, amazon sells them too a a very cheap price. http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00H2D6WUA?ref_=smi_www_rcol_go_smi&%2AVersion%2A=1&%2Aentries%2A=0&pldnSite=1
This is what they gave my kid, and I think it's a good book, no pejorative, information that is up to day, starts with the basics. Don't be ashamed because you are learning a little late - you are learning facts, and that's the most important thing.
https://www.amazon.com/Whats-Happening-Girls-Revised-Third/dp/1557047685
Did anyone else get this one?
My sister had the misfortune to be given it. I had The Care and Keeping of You.
I found CUNT to be a particularly interesting read.
Probably our bodies ourselves. It's been years since I read it, but I'm pretty sure it included dick pics.
A book called "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" has lots of info on this. Even if you don't want to learn to track your ovulation, the book is readable and interesting just to know more about what's going on with your body.
Not sure if this violates any rules, but plan B is available through amazon. I try to mention it whenever applicable, so pass it on if you want: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00H2D6WUA
>Has anyone heard of being addicted to someone, even with major abuse happening?
The idea you're looking for here is co-dependency.
Co-dependent No More is a book that is commonly recommended to people with this problem.
Coming from a very dysfunctional family, I have seen a lot of this. It is very sad. As yet, I have never been able to convince a co-dependent person to get away from their abuser, though I sure have tried over the years with multiple people. I hope you have more luck than I have had.
This book might help you understand the problem. If you can get your ex to read it as well - even better.
Plan B is $33.99 on Amazon.
http://www.amazon.com/Plan-Emergency-Contraceptive-Tablet-Contains/dp/B001BKRG46/ref=pd_sim_121_3?ie=UTF8&dpID=413oFci1JAL&dpSrc=sims&preST=_AC_UL160_SR160%2C160_&refRID=1GC62JYBDTNVGETY1385
OR
$38.50 and Prime eligible
http://www.amazon.com/Plan-One-step-Emergency-Contraceptive-Tablet/dp/B00H2D6WUA/ref=pd_bxgy_121_2?ie=UTF8&refRID=0PBQ6H6AAGXC2KJTRW6E
They have it on Amazon. Does that count?
I am told Plan B keeps for four years, and it's available on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Plan-One-step-Emergency-Contraceptive-Tablet/dp/B00H2D6WUA
I knew multiple people in my own life who had pregnancies despite use of birth control. Because of this I also was paranoid so I always used 2 methods of birth control for over a decade with my now husband. There are multiple options besides the pill - condoms, spermicide, even calendar method/NFP (varying levels of of this sex-timing method depending on how much effort/time you want to invest)
Would recommend this book, its very comprehensive.
Naturally this isn't for every situation, but this is still an option regardless of where you live (in secret):
https://www.amazon.com/Plan-B-One-Step-1-tablet/dp/B00H2D6WUA
cunt
Plan B is now on Amazon at $33.60 today.
"Our Bodies Ourselves"
https://www.amazon.com/Bodies-Ourselves-Boston-Womens-Collective/dp/1439190666/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1492052773&sr=8-3&keywords=our+bodies+ourselves
The grown up version. Every woman should read this book IMHO. Everything you need to know.
http://www.amazon.com/Bodies-Ourselves-Boston-Womens-Collective/dp/1439190666/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1344050193&sr=1-1&keywords=our+bodies+ourselves
nonono. Wrong question. Get a softcup: Softcup, 14 Disposable Menstrual Discs https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000X29GY6/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_P3OTAbHMX9KHJ
You can have sex with it in. Just insert, clean up/take a shower, then sex.
Just BTW, Amazon links include all kinds of unnecessary crap, most of which can be omitted. You can cut it down to "/dp" and the ISBN, e.g.:
http://www.amazon.com/dp/0818403128 ("What's Happening to Me?" An Illustrated Guide to Puberty)
http://www.amazon.com/dp/0818402539 (Where Did I Come From?)
Although leaving the title in can be useful
Try Softcups if you are worried about intense suction. These guys are a totally different shape and shallower. They used to make ones you reuse for a whole cycle and then toss, but I am not sure if they switched over to just the single use ones. Still, it’s 12 hours.
You should read Whipping Girl by Julia Serano. You're going say, "WHAT? But that's by a transsexual woman and I'm not!", and I get that, but seriously it's a book about how sometimes society focuses its general misogyny on feminine people specifically and makes you feel ashamed about it. Bet you'll find it empowering.