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You are loved, cared, about and wanted beyond what you believe. Speaking as a veteran, Your discharge doesn't matter to me. You are a human first, and you deserve to be helped. If it was up to me, the Va can shove it. That being said; It can still be a cruel place for both veterans that get out honorably, and civilians in general who need help but can't afford it., and I'm saying this because I can relate to your struggles as I wasn't able to go to therapy for months when I was going through it. But I just want to say this....It get's better. It always gets better! No matter what you believe, in or how you feel now. The present you isn't the future you, and all though the present you doesn't have the answers the future you does. So don't get caught up in the lies your mind is telling you now. They are all lies, none of it is true. You have a future, you are loved, and you can find happiness again. Don't compare yourself to others either! This is a journey. Your Journey, but some people never get past the first part of it because they don't reach out for help. But reading this post I can see that you want it. So I'm going to tell you everything I did, and I pray that you do the same. Keep in mind, I was at the bottom of the bottom, I was 4,000$ in debt, no job, and living with my parents. So there's no excuse for you to say that I was gifted. Because hope was all I ever had to begin with. I tried something, and guess what I don't consider myself depressed, anxious, or anything anymore. I found PEACE. So listen to me EVEN if it sounds stupid, even if it sounds ridiculous, even if it seems pointless. Please if you would rather, grow than be destroyed when confronted by evil. Start doing some of these things, and I promise you, you'll find what I did. Inner peace, and a gifted outlook of the world.

1. Take adult vitamins, and magnesium. (40% of people with mental disorders, lack magnesium.)
   
2. Work out (This increases dopamine described as runners higher.)
   
3. Write about how you feel. (This is another form of introspective thinking, which is basically You studying how you truly feel because of something you said, wrote, or thought about causing you to find the root of your problem.
   
4. Introspective thinking. (Question why you see the world the way you do. Do you think the world is evil, or are the things that you are thinking as evil now as the evil thing?)
   
5. Educate yourself on psychology. (Don't have a therapist be your own therapist.)
   
6. Change your diet. (Increase fiber, and add more vitamins to it.)
   
7. Go to church! (This no joke saved my life. It opened my door to a community that loved me for who I am, and it can give you a higher purpose.)
   
8. Direction, and gas to take us there. Don't have an answer? Make God your direction, and his love for you, you're gas.) (I mean it. Look at it from a psychology perspective. When we don't have Direction, and gas to get there we find ourselves suffering because we are stagnating in our car in the middle of nowhere. We have no higher purpose or plan that gets us nowhere.)
   
9. Have you ever heard of r/NoFap? Give it a try.
   
10. NEVER STOP TRYING NEW THINGS TO GET OUT OF THIS.
    
11. Talk to a family member.
    
12. Meditate (Even if it's for 5 minutes.)
    
13. Know that meds, therapists, and a solution exists. So you have hope ITS THERE. Go to these things, and if you use them can get out of it I promise.
    
14. Wash your teeth, and clean your room whenever you can.
    
15. Separate your mind from who you are. Our mind can go haywire, and 9/10 we listen to it. BUT BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY THIS. The reason why it does is that we let it get oversaturated with all the wrong things. To replace the bad things with the good things, challenge those thoughts. If it's negative; Say something positive. don't just stand there and take it. DEFY what you think is wrong, and stand up for yourself. YOU your soul deserves it because it's there.
    
16. Learn to love yourself.
    
17. GET A SLEEP CYCLE. A healthy one that gives you 8 hours of sleep.
    
18. give yourself grace.
    
19. Drink green tea.
    
    ​
    
    Here are some videos right now you can examine.
    
    https://youtu.be/Xm_2zmX6Akc
    
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k3rhPa7h4ro&t=1257s
    
    https://youtu.be/4OmC6LyO5QI
    
    ​
    
    Books:
    
    https://www.amazon.com/Mindwise-Misunderstand-Others-Think-Believe/dp/1491544325
    
    https://www.amazon.com/12-Rules-Life-Antidote-Chaos/dp/B0797Y87JC/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2CJEEHYRE681V&keywords=12+rules+for+life+by+jordan+peterson&qid=1573031274&s=books&sprefix=12+rules%2Cstripbooks%2C189&sr=1-1
    
    ​
    
    Challenge your thoughts. Challenge your beliefs. Look at things for what they really are, and not how they make you feel. There is no place you can go were you can't go back from again. Because if you examine it truly. You'll see that it really isn't all that bad. All you have to do is do this or do that. Nothing is unfixable.
    
    ​
    
    Here's a song I want you to listen to. The reality is that life is beautiful, and it's worth living. We just need to find the reason why beyond our perception because perception isn't forever. It can be changed like a pair of glasses. We just need to give the time it deserves.
    
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e934LuQlAeg
    
    I'll pray for you, things will get better. I'm proof.
    
    https://paste.ubuntu.com/p/FcBm4twGgR/
    
    (Notes to my therapist.) (Look at how recent this was.)

Often times in the lives of humans we let ourselves be defined by externals, but this is only truly harmful to those who have never defined themselves internally, because without this internal definition, this laying out of who we are as defined by what we value most in the universe around us, without this, external definitions become the only thing we are and this is a horrible place to be.

When I find myself in a dark place, defined by things external to myself which leave me little control or direction in my own life, I look again at my internal definition of myself, my definition of the universe around me and when those are again refreshed in my mind, the external things loose their power because the master context of my life is switched back to those things most important -- valuable -- to me and my life.

If you don't have your own base definition of yourself, only just some awkward feeling of self left over from times past, then I envy you your task, for you get to build your definition in your immediate future, while mine was built so long ago -- not yet complete, but then I'm not yet dead.

Build your definition of yourself. There are many ways to do this. One thing which was most helpful to me at the age of twenty-two when I found it was this warrior's book, "A Happy Death" for it helped me understand that morals need not be religious, that self-interest and care was not selfishness, and that to live your life with the purpose of becoming the best human you can be is the most honorable way to die, and if you were this guy, well, the answer would be the same. His book tells a warrior's tale, too.

Accept that you were a warrior then, that you're a warrior now, and only the battle has changed. Build your self, it's your primary tool and will let you permanently put the externalities in their proper perspective.

Best wishes, warrior.

Did you go straight to a 4 year or a community college? I went to a community college at first and I highly recommend it. That is sort of why they exist- to help you prepare for a four year degree. You can take a few classes and get back in the swing. My (and most) JuCo offered a class on school habits: how to study, how to take notes, writing papers. I highly recommend one. They are not super challenging, JuCos that is. You could definitely hold down a part time job to pay the bills simultaneously, so you dont waste your GI Bill on community college. Also, there is this helpful book https://www.amazon.com/Strategic-Student-Veteran-Successfully-Transitioning/dp/1499341245

But college aint designed to be easy- remember that. It is supposed to be challenging. Even after community college, going to a University was a shock the first couple of semesters. Eventually you get the hang of it, however.

On the social note, I also tried to "fit in" and make friends. Be a part of campus. And I failed. But the truth is.....you will never be a regular student. You are radically different than everyone else on that campus. I'm definitely not suggesting you become the grumpy, recluse vet, but there is not something wrong with you because you are unable to fit in with college students. Dude, they are much younger and much less exposed to the real world. In general, it is harder as adults to make friends. All I can say....PUT YOURSELF OUT THERE. If you want to meet people and make friends, you have to make yourself a bit uncomfortable. What are you into? Find a meetup group or some organization dedicated to it and attend it. I got into vegetable gardening, so I joined a community garden. Met new friends. Many different ideas (for adults) out there- book clubs, sports leagues, volunteer organizations. You can't be a recluse and then complain about not having friends (not saying you have been one). Your school may have a veterans organization. I would at least suggest checking it out. You may or may not take to it. Some are cool, some are stressful and stupid. But I think you owe yourself to at least check it out, if it exist. You might be able to meet some similar people to you.

You owe yourself a college degree. In whatever. You have a fucking mechanism to make it completely free for you. Latest data suggest the average college grad will make $1mil more over their lifetime than a high school grad. You have a chance to attain that for free, so don't give up.

Look, a lot of talk going on here about loud noises, bangs, booms, PTSD and scary situations.... not to worry my friends....

Just make sure you all have your authorized safety vests on !!
That is all !!

Sincerely, Navy Medicine Representative

Sparklely Good Feeling Vest

Vest for all E-2C Hawkeye Aircrew

Ultimate for all those super cool Tacticool types


Happy 4th of July !! God Bless America and all Her Service Personnel, home and abroad !!

I’m a vet and married to a vet with PTSD.

Try this book The Five Love Languages

A counselor recommended it to me. Basically there are 5 ways in which people give and receive love. If you don’t speak the same “language” one or both of you will always feel like your being neglected. It helps both of you figure out what “language” you speak so you can both better meet each other’s needs.

Way too complicated. Budgets do not need all of this and when people see this type of complexity they tend to say "fuck this mess".

It works for you, fine. You do you.

I use this. Easy Peasey. I'm looking at it now, it's propped up in the corner.

https://www.amazon.com/Quartet-Erase-Whiteboard-Magnetic-MWDW1723M-BK/dp/B00UNNRFOI/ref=sr_1_3?s=office-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1521845388&sr=1-3&keywords=dry+erase+board

I 'm not a net worth person. Tracking net worth is worthless to me. I don't care what my accounts were worth 10 years ago.

What are my monthly expenses? How much can I draw at 4% from my investments? That's all I care about.

I use the boglehead philosphy. If you have a simple portfolio, no need for layers of complexity.

The key o money management is a budget. I use whatever I have laying around, be it an envelope or old note pad. every pay check we write it down, "Got paid x. Our budget is Y. This gets paid. This gets saved." After you set your 401k percentage and autodraft the iras and savings, it all falls into place.

I say all of this as someone who makes his living using excel.

I will add, it's not "lucky" your housing is cheaper than market. It's because you choose to take a family discount in rent. I would never do that. But I'm not you. But maybe rephrase it from "lucky" to another more accurate term. It's like someone explaining to me how to save a million dollars and in the last paragraph casually mentioning they won the lottery.

Glad this works for you. But for others looking at it, remember you don't have to have something so complex.

Some tips...

1. Look around at the curriculum taught by reputable boot camps to learn what is popular, as these boot camps are often concerned with career placement. Here's a list you can bounce off of: https://www.coursereport.com/blog/bootcamp-scholarships-for-veterans-a-comprehensive-list Here's what is taught by a boot camp in Seattle: https://www.codefellows.org/courses/code-400/
   
   
2. Take a structured course like https://www.udemy.com/the-web-developer-bootcamp/learn/v4/ (don't pay more than roughly $12 for it; it's always on sale)
   
   
3. Work towards building a portfolio of programming projects
   
   
4. Gain some insight from the Stack Overflow survey https://insights.stackoverflow.com/survey/2018/
   
   
5. Prepare yourself for coding interviews https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/0984782850/ref=ox_sc_sfl_title_10?ie=UTF8&psc=1&smid=ATVPDKIKX0DER
   
   
6. If you like to learn from books, I am a big fan of the format of Murach Books https://www.murach.com/

I can't be of any direct help to you, however, you may want to look and see if there are any 10 Steps to a Federal Job workshops around you (bases host them wherever they have their transition workshops). Here is a slideshow I found that was similar to what I went through.

They gave pointers on making a federal resume, such as really reading the job posting and emphasizing the KSA's. These things are long, as in several pages long. The bread-and-butter of the workshop is the book they gave you which has guides & sample resumes throughout it.

Best of luck!

There's an excellent book out there that tells a number of stories in this format; The Longest War

I'm currently in Afghanistan but I have zero interest in sharing, sorry.

You’re not coming across as a douche, but understand this isn’t gonna change - ever.

My recommendation?

These:
Audio-Technica ATH-M50x Professional Studio Monitor Headphones, Black https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00HVLUR86/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_p2UgDbRHWGKVK

I’d never heard of the brand before, and I always prided myself on having good headphones - but these are amazing.

Start practicing mindful meditation. "Why Buddhism is True" by Robert Wright is a good book on the subject that focuses on the science behind why it helps your brain.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MPZNG63/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1

Get lots of exercise.

Talk to a therapist.

They're not bad, but check out Hi-Fi Guides to find your next pair. These are a better headphone at like half the price, never mind that they're a "gaming headset".

Alternatively you can just get a HDD dock. This will be a bit easier to do than a full enclosure for something that will likely only be used once to pull data.

Also, look at setting up Google Drive or something similar to back this stuff up going foward so you don't run into a similar situation in the future!

(If you have any questions please ask!)

Punished By Rewards. It's a good read; I promise.

• Will he have a birthday during his time there? Send him one of these
  
  
• Send the letters using names like Chelsea Manning and Bowe Bergdhal and Edward Snowden and Jane Fonda in the senders address.
  
  
• Scribble all kinds of hooah shit on the outside of the envelopes.
  
  
• Use bright colored envelopes to draw attention.
  
  
• Mail him a pickle.
  
  
• Mail him musical greeting cards.
  
  
• Mail him an FDNY calendar
  
  
• Send brochures for gender reassignment surgery
  
  
• Send him a poster of Caitlin Jenner