Best products from r/actuallesbians

For me, making new friends is a lot like dating - in the sense that I have to go out and meet new people, see if there is a good connection, and decide whether I want to take it further (as in spend more one-on-one time together). I've even made purely platonic friends through dating sites, where the intention was platonic from the start (made one lovely straight female friend this way!).

Obviously the parameters are a bit different... with friendship, things like attractiveness, age, orientation and romantic availability are a non-issue for me (though I generally avoid friendships with single straight men, as they usually just want to date me). You don't need to worry about flirting or defining the relationship with a friend, so it's easier in some ways! However, many of the same things apply, in the sense that I am looking for people who have some interests or passions in common, have a similar sense of humour, and where the conversation flows easily and feels effortless.

Another thing I've found is that it's good to be open to people of a wide range of ages and life stages. My closest friend now is 52, and I'm 26. I also have another wonderful friend who is 19. I find that people between 25-45 tend to be more insular as they often marry, have kids and/or focus on their careers, so it can be helpful to make friends that aren't all in the same age range.

For more info, I highly recommend the following books - they helped me a lot:

https://www.amazon.com/Friendships-Dont-Just-Happen-GirlFriends-ebook/dp/B07776956H/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1518111670&sr=8-2&keywords=girlfriend+circles

https://www.amazon.com/Frientimacy-Deepen-Friendships-Lifelong-Happiness-ebook/dp/B017QL9P5Q/ref=pd_sim_351_1?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=W4H6VS3M2BAFB6HEMQ1K

I recently bought the Tantus Acute Dildo which is suitable for strapon play if that's a thing you'd like to try, but works otherwise as well, obviously. I haven't had a chance to use it for that yet, though I've tested it on myself, and it's quite nice, imo. The silicone is easy to clean, it's firm but not "hard" and the angle was pleasing. Felt better than my experience with a man's penis ever did.

I don't have much to offer as I've only recently begun buying toys of any form. I got a thigh harness as well, which I am very much looking forward to using.

I bought a cheap regular harness as well, which is generally advised against, it's comfortable, easy to adjust, but I don't expect it to last a lifetime. I know a lot of people here will suggest the SpareParts Joque if you're looking for a "good" harness that will last. If you're just looking to see if it's something you'd like, I don't see the harm in buying something cheaper. This is what I got. It hasn't gotten any practical testing yet either, but I've tried it on and it seems comfortable and secure enough.

That's all I have (limited) experience with at the moment, though I've been piling up quite the wish list on Amazon.

ok I'm here again!

I've read retellings:

Dark Wife

- about persephone and hades

- if you wish me to tell you the warnings i can, i wish books put warnings in it so people can skip it

Seafarer's Kiss

- its a siren story(like little mermaid) in viking version, if i'm not wrong

- i love how the writer portrayed loki in this XD

Promises, Promises

- i linked the review

- its funny XD

Some other fairytales, not exactly retellings

Santa Olivia

- not a retelling, its about a boxer girl, it has a sequel too

- its a nice story and funny

When Women Were Warriors

- this is set in kinda medieval times

Dragonoak

- first of a trilogy, fantasy medieval

- the world building is nice as well as the characters

Second Mango

- its a story about a princess turned queen that searches for love of a girl

- its a sweet and cute story and hehehe its funny

Villains Don't Date Heroes

- there is a lot of monologuing here, because she's a villain, all that monologuing lol XP

- its funny

Iron & Velvet

- supernatural

- dissing twilight here and there lol XP

- monologuing too, coz she's a detective, after i realized that i got over the monologuing lol XP

lol i just basically listed all i've read for the past half year or so lol XP \>.\< i'm so sorry \>.\< and its not even historical

My ex-husband and I just went through this, this summer. Fortunately, we don't have kids so that made life easier. However, I don't have a job so we've had to live together while I finish my master's degree. (I mean, he could have kicked me out but he's my best friend and I'm his.) Like you, he was incredibly supportive. I found this book super helpful (though I did not have an affair. It just has a lot on guilt and shame and internalized homophobia. There's a huge list of resources in the back of the book. Other books to read, the author's forum, etc. It's great! The author of that book is a psychologist who also realized she was gay later in life (married with children) though she had an affair. So extra guilt. She created a forum and even responds to posts sometimes. It's a little "free therapy" in a way. :)

I found therapy with a queer therapist SUPER helpful.

Knowing that he wasn't angry was also helpful. Knowing that he didn't feel like he wasted time with me was great.

Mostly, internalized homophobia is hard and reading books about why women come out later in life (sometimes) really helped me a lot.

First off I want to tell you you're an awesome dad. My heart goes out to your daughter. If you think it'll help tell her that a bunch of internet strangers are sending her virtual hugs :)

A quick search for local LGBT resources turned up Stonewall and the LGBT Foundation. TrevorSpace is a private forum run by the Trevor Project, a nonprofit aimed at reducing LGBT teen suicide rates. 7 Cups of Tea is an online therapy site. Hopefully someone in the UK can offer something more specific.

If your daughter has access to a therapist or counselor who is LGBT-positive, encourage her to talk with a professional. Therapy can help develop confidence and coping skills in a hostile environment, and having more support is always a good thing. I struggled with anxiety and insecurity myself (though unrelated to coming out), and it helped me a lot. Do you know if her school has any LGBT resources? Can you talk with teachers or administrators about how she's being bullied? I know that having parents and/or teachers intervening is basically the uncoolest thing ever but anything has to be better than what she's going through. That said, (obviously) talk to her first about what she thinks might help in some way.

See what you can do to minimize exposure to homophobia outside of school. Maybe point her towards some teen-appropriate gay movies and books so that she has some positive examples of lesbian relationships. There are a lot of lesbian couples on youtube who do vlogs - there should be people on this sub who can recommend some channels if you're interested. This book is supposed to be a good resource for parents as well. Best of luck to you and your daughter.

Hey, I did that whole thing a couple years ago at 32. Enjoy the exhilarating terror! It was all-consuming for me for a while, and I still get euphoria bumps of "holy shit I fucking love women" but I think that might just be what it feels like to actually be interested in people?? Who knew!

>Is there a handbook or something I could follow? /s

You joke, but Late Bloomers was recommended to me in a few places. I had a mixed reaction to it; I was hoping it'd have more stories (or any at all) from women (like me) who had just been in pure denial. If it matches your experience more closely, you may get a lot more out of it than I did. That said, it was good to read to help normalize what I was feeling. There are other, similar books on the 'Customers Also Bought' section, but this is the only one I personally read.

Aside from that, I immersed myself in other gay-lady media: movies, TV, blogs, articles, tumblrs, whatever. I dabbled around a bit on personals sites, and enjoyed how normal/good chatting ladies up felt even if the meetings were meh. You've also got the added hook of having kids -- I don't know of any to refer, but I'd have to think there are lesbian parenting forums out there full of women with your experience.

Good luck, have fun, relish the feeling.

That sounds really challenging! Are there any free activities in your area that you could join? I used to go to free meditation groups and found them helpful. Even if I don't always interact with people much, just getting out of the house and being around a positive and friendly bunch of people was encouraging.

I've even made purely platonic female friends on dating sites - I found a straight woman on OkC with heaps of common interests, so we met up and we're still really good friends several months later. I know Bumble has a special "BFF" setting if that's something that would interest you.

I also found Shasta Nelson's book ['Friendships Don't Just Happen!'] (https://www.amazon.com/Friendships-Dont-Just-Happen-GirlFriends-ebook/dp/B07776956H/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1522918901&sr=8-1&keywords=friendships+don%27t+just+happen) had some useful tips. [She has a blog too] (https://www.girlfriendcircles.com/blog) that you can check out.

Context: I'm a 21-year-old butch gay woman who has been wearing men's boxer briefs pretty much exclusively for about a year now.

I wear Hanes, Fruit of the Loom, or American Apparel in small or medium — these, these, or these, mostly.

1. Not too terribly important, but I'm not going to buy underwear that is particularly feminine or has joke slogans printed on it. Black/grey for sure, and the basic red/blue/green, maybe fuchsia/purple.
   
2. Doesn't matter too much, I kind of like the Hanes X label. A thick waistband is definitely important though.
   
3. I'd be interested.
   
4. Absolutely.
   
5. Fit, comfort, appearance are super important. Long inseam, thick waistband, and a front pouch that doesn't sag are all really important. Hanes, AA, and Fruit of the Loom are both great for this; lots of other brands, like Meundies, Calvin Klein, Uniqlo, etc have huge pouches, and I avoid them. Price is also important. Hanes/FotL come in inexpensive multi-packs, so I'm not about to spend $20 a pair for everyday undies.
   
6. Can't stand the ultra-short inseam of most "boy shorts" designed for girls. I'd prefer a 5.5"-7" inseam.
   
7. I think I covered just about everything in question 5.

I love the Share, which is a strapless double dildo. It's the easiest of it's kind to keep in, feels the best(IMO), and provides for maximum skin on skin contact, which is amazing.

As for harnesses, the Spareparts Joque is the best I've come across. It's super adjustable and comfortable. The ring is stretchy so that you can use all different sized dildos. It also works beautifully with the Share. The ring is lower than usual, providing for maximum clitoral stimulation.

Regardless of how ugly it is, the Eroscillator is my favorite vibrator. It's virtually silent, and super powerful. The Hitachi Magic Wand is a close second.

I also LOVE glass g-spot dildos.

If you like audiobooks, these are all good! Oh, and they've got dope kindle versions too!

Dreadnought, by April Daniels

Sovereign, by April Daniels

Telling Lies Online, by Miranda MacLeod

And Playing the Role of Herself, by K.E. Lane

Annie On My Mind, by Nancy Garden

The Gravity Between Us, by Kristen Zimmer

Everything Leads to You, by Nina LaCour

Kiss The Girl (Soho Loft Book 1), by Melissa Brayden

Just Three Words (Soho Loft Book 2), by Melissa Brayden

Ready or Not (Soho Loft Book 3), by Melissa Brayden

The Princess Affair, by Nell Stark

Santa Olivia, by Jacqueline Carey

Saints Astray (Santa Olivia sequel), by Jacqueline Carey

Ask the Passangers, by A.S. King

The Miseducation of Cameron Post, by Emily M. Danforth

The Dark Wife, by Sarah Diemer

Protector of the Realm, by Gun Brooke

Zero Visibility, by Georgia Beers

Popcorn Love, by KL Hughes

How Sweet It Is, by Melissa Brayden

Her Name in the Sky, by Kelly Quindlen

Turn Back Time, by Radclyffe (btw, most Radclyffe books have audiobook versions)

The Color of Love, by Radclyffe

Trauma Alert, by Radclyffe

Above All, Honor, by Radclyffe

Taking Fire, by Radclyffe

Infinite Loop, Meghan O'Brien

The Brutal Truth, by Lee Winter

Miss Match, by Fiona Riley

Like Jazz, by Heather Blackmore

Shield of Justice, by Radclyffe

Casting Lacey, by Elle Spencer

Calendar Girl, by Georgia Beers

It Should Be a Crime, by Carsen Taite

Trigger, by Jessica Webb

Desire by Starlight, by Radclyffe

Rescued Heart (Puppy Love Book 1), by Georgia Beers

Run to You (Puppy Love Book 2), by Georgia Beers

Dare to Stay (Puppy Love Book 3), by Georgia Beers

Just Jorie, by Robin Alexander

Just Juliet, by Charlotte Reagan

At the Water's Edge, by Harper Bliss

<br />
What do you mean I listen to too many gay audiobooks?<br />
<br />
Assuming you enjoy reading WLW books as well, or want to discover audiobooks that I myself haven't yet sampled yet, you can search [this list](https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/29917.Best_F_F_Romance_Books?page=1) from goodreads!

I haven't worn either, but I've seen a lot of both. And been on the receiving end of a share many times (it's what my partners use).

The share is heavy, and just bigger all around than the (standard) feeldoe. I've seen someone walk around for hours at a sex party wearing a feeldoe. I've never known anyone who could do that with a share. And fucking with an unsupported share is way awkward. But the share is really solid, and with a good harness (I recommend the Joque by SpareParts) you can wear it quite comfortably. I know two women who can come while using that specific combination to fuck folks. But I know more who can't, so YMMV. Regardless of coming, share and spareparts seems to be a favored combination for ladies I know who are fairly to extremely strap-on experienced. But it's a higher price point than the feeldoe alone.

The feeldoe has a space for a bullet vibe, but as I understand it the vibe is better for the receiver than the penetrator. Still, definitely another point in favor of the feeldoe.

I have a date soon with the feeldoe lady I mentioned earlier, so hopefully I can report on that soon. :)

“This is a Book for Parents of Gay Kids” by Danielle Owens-Reid and Kristin Russo is an awesome resource! It is aimed at the parent’s of queer adolescents (I gifted it to my very accepting mom after I came out at 20 and it was still a great resource to help her organize her thoughts and formulate further questions that prompted thoughtful discussions for us!) and provides really great insight into what present and future issues your child may encounter. Also provides first-hand accounts from queer youth and their parent to provide additional perspectives that you may relate to. An overall wonderful resource from 2 queer-identifying authors.

https://www.amazon.com/This-Book-Parents-Gay-Kids/dp/1452127530

Best wishes to you and your awesome kiddo!

Hi friend!

I'm having a lot of the same feelings but fortunately, my H and I don't have kids. I haven't told him yet. I'm going to go to therapy first to really dive deep into this to understand it myself before I tell him. I want to have exactly what I need to say to him down before I approach it.

Have you read Living Two Lives: Married to a Man & In Love with a Woman by Joanne Fleisher? I found it super helpful and validating. She's a therapist who was in your situation. Except, she was having an affair with a woman. She also has a forum for married women who are lesbians to post on. https://askjoanne.forums.net/

Good luck on your journey!

I didn't see the Dragonoak trilogy here anywhere.

These books came out of nowhere for me and hit me hard. They are HARD core fantasy (dragons n all that) and the lead character is gay with a romantic love interest.

The story itself is unlike any gay literature I've come across before. It is so well written and immersive. Usually with Lesbian novels I feel like I wouldn't even pick them up if they didn't have lesbian characters. They are usually cliche and not very gripping with the obvious exceptions. These books are not like that. The world is rich and the characters even more so. There are moments of pure agony (No spoilers but jeez) and real page turning scenes. I was genuinely lost for a few weeks when I finished book 3.

​

The author is just fantastic and I believe the first book in this series was actually the first book they published which makes it even more jaw dropping how good they are.

​

Here is a link to the first book in the series: https://www.amazon.com/Dragonoak-Complete-Kastelir-Sam-Farren-ebook/dp/B00WOXQVM2/ref=redir_mobile_desktop?_encoding=UTF8&dpID=51yDgr10CyL&dpPl=1&keywords=dragonoak&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&qid=1491413672&ref=plSrch&ref_=mp_s_a_1_2&sr=8-2

​

Here is the authors twitter account: https://twitter.com/sfarrenbooks?lang=en . They do have another book called Bitfrost but I have only just started it so I don't have much feedback yet.

​

I sincerely hope you give this a go and enjoy it. I have no doubt that you will.

​

I also recommend it to anyone regardless of the fantasy aspect. It is a wonderful story.

Story first, then advice. I got my first vibrator after being with a girl for a year and a half. We were slow. Now I am (very) rapidly expanding my collection. Okay. Here's my basic guide to sex toy shopping, based entirely on my own experience:

• Go read Oh Joy Sex Toy
  
• Google "Sex Positive Toy Shop [your city]"
  
• Actually go to your local sex positive shop and ask the super-knowledgable staff for advice. They've heard everything. If you're super shy, go on a weekday morning - the store is usually really quiet then. If nothing is local, check out online reviews of toys (In addition to Oh Joy, I like Autostraddle's reviews.
  
• Look for DIY inspiration, like this one from Scarleteen. Sometimes it's best to try a DIY or very cheap toy to decide if you want to drop the big bucks on something MUCH nicer. For instance, I needed to try reversed clothes pins (once) to decide that I really needed some real nipple clamps.
  
• If you can get your hands on it, read Girl Sex 101 as it has a great section on using all sorts of toys, as well as a good starter for matching lubes with toys.
  
• Read erotica/erotic comics/watch porn. This may or may not be for you, but reading erotica featuring toys was a major point in my being willing to try things. (Be cautious though, because I never would have considered owning a ball gag until I read Sunstone and developed a "that's really cute" response to them... so this step may be hard on your wallet.)
  
• Try things out! My first vibrator is by no means my favorite now, but there was no way I would have bought what I have now right away. It was the right price, I could put rechargeable batteries in it, it was small, it was body-safe, and I liked the color. If you learn something, it wasn't a mistake.
  

Try visiting a sex shop together and picking out somethings that pique your interests. Which includes a nice vibrator if you are going to be using one because the good ones are quieter then the drug store ones and work a hell of alot better FYI. Also a 69 position would allow you all to be body to body and still get a better angle. But really all you can do is mix it up and stuff with different angles and stimulations and see if that helps. I would suggest checking out this book or this one

Also are both of you new to this or is one of you recently out? To me it seems like it would be a self-conscious thing maybe. At least that kind of was how things were when me and my girl started doing stuff. It had to be dark and she'd feel weird if I watched her undressed before climbing into bed. But eventually we worked it out where we're both completely comfortable with each other and communicate to the point where its better everytime.

Generally if I'm going to a new place and I'm not sure what to wear, I check the club's website. They usually have pictures of the crowds and you can get a sense for what people usually wear there. Once you get the gist, wear something you're comfortable in!

If you want to look femme but still boost visibility, you can get a cute, fitted plaid shirt (or dress) and/or a pride bracelet.

I rocked this and this for Pride and it worked out well.

!!! Girl, I GOT YOU. GIRL SEX 101! You wanna study up, this is a great introduction to both wlw romance and sex. I also highly recommend the Sex Nerd Sandra podcast; look through the archives and you'll find episodes focused on specific acts where the host interviews real people about how they experience them.

Good luck and godspeed, my friend!

Okay...so I tried to reply to this during Reddit's awful down time yesterday. Here goes another try:

There is a great book about this very subject, called Dear John, I Love Jane: Women Write About Leaving Men for Women. I highly recommend it. Trish Bendix, editor at Afterellen, has a piece in the book, as well as a friend of mine.

http://www.amazon.com/Dear-John-Love-Jane-Leaving/dp/1580053394/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1323358890&sr=8-1

I think the film is currently on Netflix. It's okay, but the graphic novel is much better. I recommend reading it in paper format. Amazon has it used for a very reasonable price. :)

Do you have an LGBT center near you? The nearest might be in a nearby city. If they do, see if there are any lesbian group sessions. It can be eye-opening to meet, hear and see other women who have gone through similar situations and survived: what went right, what went not-right and what they'd do differently if they had it to do all over again.

Here are a few books that I tend to recommend about your situation. They're written by women in your situation:
Dear John, I love Jane.
Living Two Lives.
Married Women Who Love Women.

They come in Kindle editions, so you could read them on your phone without worrying about leaving them laying around the house.

https://www.amazon.com/Girl-Sex-101-Allison-Moon/dp/0983830959

Buy this book, download it, read it cover to cover. Never had gone down on a girl before but came with all these techniques in mind and it really worked well! Of course be reactive to what she likes, but this book really helps.

Also, wine... maybe have a couple glasses and get into it a bit.

Also this book is highly recommended, it's called Dear John, I Love Jane and is filled with stories of women who have left men for women. You are certainly not alone!

Notes on Love and Courage is really just a collection of quotes from Hugh Prather's journal over the years. The book that quoted that book (I guess my citation could have been more specific) is called Living Two Lives: Married to a Man & In Love With a Woman. You might or might not find it useful.

Highly highly recommend this book. http://www.amazon.com/Girl-Sex-101-Allison-Moon/dp/0983830959 It has detailed descriptions, diagrams, and it's basically the best thing ever written for baby queers.

Yep, you can get it here
http://www.amazon.com/Blue-Warmest-Color-Julie-Maroh/dp/1551525143
Keep in mind that it's not a novel, but a graphic novel! 🎉

Lesbian/Queer main characters:

Batwoman - She's a lesbian and her romantic relationships play a fairly important role in the series. Her villains are a bit B-list but they're enjoyable reads never the less. Some controversy over DC's decision to prohibit her "happiness" and troubles with the talented creative staff that are worth investigating beforehand but it's worth noting that these issues do not effect the trade paperbacks 1-3. Don't make my mistake and accidentally buy Batgirl comics and wonder when she's supposed to start kissing ladies.

Lumberjanes - The trade paperback is supposed to come out some time next year but individual issues are currently being published. All ages comic that portrays a scout type group at a summer camp full of monsters. I'm not personally reading it but I've heard nothing but good things.

Funhome - A proper "graphic novel." An unbelievably intelligent and nuanced perspective on gender and sexuality. Bechdel compares her coming out process against her late father's closeted homosexuality to draw an intimate but calculated portrait of American sexuality and family.

Lesbian/Queer minor characters:

Saga - Holy shit, I can't recommend this enough. So utterly fantastic that words fail me. I buy this for everyone I know who's even faintly interested in comics.

The Walking Dead - The queer characters don't show up for a long while but this is the series the very popular TV show is based on. It's a little "Drama-y" for me but my girlfriend's dad gobbles them up like there's no tomorrow.

Not queer but awesome:

Chew - A world where poultry is outlawed and people have superpowers only related to food. My mom called it "kind of weird" which it is. I can't get enough.

Revival - The dead come to life but they're mostly just cranky, okay, sometimes murderous, but not that often. Strong female protagonists.

Although I'm a virgin the idea of giving oral isn't appealing to me...it just seems...a little gross...so I get where your gf is coming from, that said, there is a good book on sex that I was recommended:
http://www.amazon.com/The-Whole-Lesbian-Sex-Book/dp/1573441996
Sometimes it seems a little out there, but I think there is some good stuff to be had

[Breaks through wall]

HAVE I GOT SOMETHING FOR YOU! Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic is a comic I have yet to read, but am suggesting it because I'm a bit obsessed with the musical adaption (which is just called Fun Home and is 100% worth looking into!). I have to throw it out here.

The author, Alison Bechdel, has other comics too! Here are some of them.

I seriously could not recommend the Joque Spare Parts harness anywhere near enough. Worth the upfront investment because its the greatest thing ever. Never falls off, fully adjustable, stays in place, can throw it in the wash, works will all different types of dildos (including feeldoe/share/etc) really well. I have the thing version which I love, but theres also the jock strap version, which I've linked to. Seriously, if you can bite the bullet with the price of this one...do it!

Excellent step by step instructions ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

But more importantly be led by what feels good. If you're not enjoying something don't force it.

Make sure you read the graphic novel! The author is a friend of mine, so this is totally partial, but it has received a lot of acclaim: http://www.amazon.com/Blue-Warmest-Color-Julie-Maroh/dp/1551525143

I'm currently in the middle of reading Fun Home by Alison Bechdel (who also writes and illustrates Dykes to Watch Out For). It's a memoir about Bechdel coming out as a lesbian while also coming to terms with her father's suicide and learning that he was a closeted homosexual. It's also a comic book, so it might be an easier read if you are dyslexic. I haven't finished the book yet so I can't wholeheartedly recommend it, but I'm enjoying it so far.

Here are some links for the product in the above comment for different countries:

Amazon Smile Link: http://smile.amazon.com/Borderline-Personality-Disorder-Demystified-Understanding/dp/1569244561


|Country|Link|
|:-----------|:------------|
|UK|amazon.co.uk|
|Spain|amazon.es|
|France|amazon.fr|
|Germany|amazon.de|
|Japan|amazon.co.jp|
|Canada|amazon.ca|
|Italy|amazon.it|
|China|amazon.cn|




This bot is currently in testing so let me know what you think by voting (or commenting). The thread for feature requests can be found here.

It's based on this graphic novel by an actual lesbian so that gives me hope

https://www.amazon.com/Whole-Lesbian-Sex-Book-Passionate/dp/1573441996

The Whole Lesbian Sex Book is a phenomenal resource. I'd suggest checking it out.

I haven't read that book, however I have read "Borderline Personality Disorder Demystified" by Robert O. Firedel. (http://www.amazon.com/Borderline-Personality-Disorder-Demystified-Understanding/dp/1569244561)
That book as very good and pretty accurate in its descriptions of BPD.
As someone who is personally diagnosed with BPD I don't like books that make you look like the villain who is out to hurt anyone who they can get attached to. (My own personal opinion). --->(http://books.google.com/books/about/Stop_Walking_on_Eggshells.html?id=UFrAvF2Bj-cC)

Also recommending SparePart's Joque. Comfy, ridiculously simple, sturdy.

Also, water-based lube.

You can take a peek at this quick and dirty introduction by Erika Moen, or if you're willing to invest a bit of money, get this book

If you're into YA, I've been keeping a list of the ones with queer female protagonists:

--The Tiger’s Daughter by K. Arsenault Rivera

--Of Fire and Stars and Of Ice and Shadows by Audrey Coulthurst

--Inkmistress by Audrey Coulthurst

--Labyrinth Lost by Zoraida Córdova

--The Defiant Heir by Melissa Caruso

-- Daughter of Fire: Conspiracy of the Dark by Karen Frost

--Girls Made of Snow and Glass by Melissa Bashardoust

--Ash and Huntress by Malinda Lo

--Breaking Legacies by Zoe Reed

--Reign of the Fallen and Song of the Dead by Sarah Glenn Marsh

--Castle on the River Vistula by Michelle Tea

--The Afterward, by E.K. Johnston

--Crier's War by Nina Varela

--The Seafarer's Kiss by Julia Ember

--The books in Shira Glassman's Mangoverse

--Ship of Smoke and Steel by Django Wexler

--The Raven and the Reindeer by T. Kingfisher

--The Cursed Queen by Sarah Fine

--Robbergirl by S.T. Gibson

--Sam Farren's Dragonoak series

--Starless by Jacqueline Carey

--The Nobles of Sperath by Siera Maley

--Girls of Paper and Fire by Natasha Ngan