(Part 2) Best products from r/aspergers

Alright, some things I've done over the years to help with this stuff.

When it comes to picking up non-verbal clues, I rely almost entirely on Dr. Paul Ekman's Emotions Revealed: Recognizing Faces and Feelings to Improve Communication and Emotional Life. This book changed my life and drastically affected my communications. It's getting to the point that I'm getting better than other people when it comes to recognizing emotions in others. I use the book as a sort of guide to a game that I never learned the rules of. I still make mistakes, but overall I do a pretty good job picking up emotional cues. Treat it as a game (think the conversation bosses in Deus Ex Human Revolution) where you need to figure out the emotional response and respond accordingly.

Second, try learning one of those religious conversion conversation guides. Even if you're not religious, they work wonders. The idea is that religious conversation guides are designed to make the other person feel as comfortable as possible and to feel like you understand them and love them (for the purpose of conversion, but you'll do fine with just letting them feel good.

Personally, I use the FORT method. (Link for an example for a sales version of it called FORM that also contains a good example)

F is for friends (who do stuff together) and family

O is for occupation (job)

R is for religion/recreation (essentially, beliefs/hobbies)

T is for testimony. This is the deeply personal stuff from their life.

So, here's how to use FORT method. The idea is that each stage of FORT represents a new stage in personal relations. You start off with asking basic questions about their family or friends (I'll give an example conversation here in a little bit to demonstrate how it works) and then progressively move down the list as they feel comfortable sharing.

Next, it's helpful to think of these four letters as four rungs of a ladder. If you keep asking about hobbies, but they keep changing it back to their job, then that's a sign that they don't want to get more personal with you, so you back off and stay within that "rung" (only F and O type questions). But, if you ask an F type question and they carry it over to an R type question, then move with them straight to R type questions. Also, you don't have to always try to move down the rung. You can just stay in the FO questions and that's perfectly fine. Many friendships don't enter the RT questions for months.

Second, as you are in a conversation, listen for key words and phrases that you can use to steer the conversation or restart it if it's dying out. For example, you notice that they mentioned their mother 3 times, even when you are asking O type questions. It's fine to just straight up say something like "I noticed you've mentioned your loving mother several times while talking about D&D. When I think of mothers and D&D, disdain is what comes to my mind more than love [soft chuckle as humor is important to communicate that it's a joke and that you're not talking ill of your own mother]. Any particular reason why you brought her up so much?" (NOTE: asking this type of question can jump down to a T type question as you're asking a very personal question about their past. Only do this if you have the time and energy to handle emotional issues. If you do do this, the person will be deeply grateful and consider you a personal friend more often than not).

Lastly, constantly ask questions. Let the other person talk. Every response should contain a question. Every response.

Using the FORT method as a guide, you can get some good conversations going. Treat it as a game where you try to keep the conversation going and keep them interested in that conversation. Last, here's an example of FORT in action.

Conversation Example

NOTE: I will be using a conversation between me and a student as an example

Me: Hello! How are you doing student? How was your weekend?

Student: I'm doing well teacher. This weekend was pretty good.

Me: What did you do over the weekend? I hope you had some fun with your friends (F type question)?

Student: Yeah, I did. We played some Overwatch. Have you seen the new Genji skin? The Japanese one?

Notice, completely skipped O type questions as he is a student and doesn't want to talk about quizzes and tests.

Me: Yeah! That skin is so awesome with the red sword and everything. Have you gotten any of the new summer skins? I am still missing soldier 76's golf pose. (now in R type questions).

Student: Haha, that was the first thing I got (soldier 76 golf pose). I haven't gotten the genji skin or D.Va's Korean skin.

Me: (remembering he mentioned he was playing with friends) Ah, that's a shame. Those are good skins. Hope the games were good over the weekend though. Have any games with your friends that stand out in your mind?

Note: I switched over to a more positive aspect of his recreation. Instead of focusing on the negative (skins he doesn't have that I do have), I switched over to highlights of his gaming experience.

Student: proceeds to tell lengthy story about him pulling off some great play that won him a game

Me: Haha, nice. I'm a terrible Hanzo player so I doubt I could pull off that play. Well, I need to get back to work, but it was good catching up with you.

Student: Yeah, it was good catching up with you teacher!

It's acting. That's all an interview is. Pick a person you think would get hired and emulate them. Be upbeat, research the company and have faith in yourself. You are likely more qualified than your peers, you just know your limits and admit them truthfully. NT's lie.

| Example: Do you know TCP/IP?
| NT: YES, I've worked with it for years. (Meaning, they have surfed the web for years.

| Aspi: Well, I've created one or two programs that use it, but mostly through a networking library which simplified the problem. There are parts of I don't completely understand. (Which is true of all people, even the inventors.)

Which one would they hire? The first one. My tips:

• Don't over-answer. Be friendly, but end your responses about 1 or 2 sentences early. They don't realize they are being vague.
  
  
• Keep them talking. 70/30 is good, 80/20 is better. Don't be evasive, just turn every answer into a question. "TCP/IP? Why yes, I know my packet protocols. (this clarifies the question, so you don't feel like you are lying) It's interesting (always be interested, pleased, happy, insert positive emotion here) you should ask that. What are you looking to do with it?
  
  
• Don't assume anything. "Is that your boat in the picture on your desk?" "Not anymore, my ex-wife took it in the divorce." (You are now associated with ex-wife.)
  
  
• Smile! Smile! Smile! Practice to not make it look fake. I know it's hard, so I sit in a quiet dark room before and after an interview.
  
  
• If you feel it, say it but in a nice way. If they seem like they are not listening, by answering phone calls, walking out, and trying to do work, say something like "I get the feeling you are not interested in me as a candidate. (YOUR feeling never his) Did I do something wrong?" If they say no, immediately say, "I'm sorry, I was mistaken." and then get them talking again with a question.
  
  
• No one ever listened their way out of a job.
  
  
• The word "AND" is great. "We are looking for someone with X." YOU: "And?" THem: "They need to start as soon as possible." You: (repeat and clarify) "Oh you need someone immediately? Why the rush?" (makes for good banter.
  
  
• If there is an awkward silence at the start of the interview, say "Alright, why don't you start." You have taken charge and then deferred. Meeting him as an equal. Also a funny thing happens: THEY START.
  
  
• Get this book. He has tons of good advice for making sales, and that's what an interview is, a sales call. Sell yourself. I don't know if this all works in other cultures, however.
  
  EDIT: I almost forgot, look up "Closing Questions". At the end of the interview ask something that assumes you already worked there. I like: "Do you think I would fit into your company's culture?"

I use a Bullet Journal... I'll describe mine to you just to see if anything strikes you with inspiration, but I guess the real question is, what purpose do you want it to serve?

It's never been perfect, but its come a long way in serving my needs... I went through a lot of adaptations tho... but I love it because it helps me get things done without having to feel bogged down, and I guess that was the point of starting it to begin with...

I've recently started to use a Quarterly cover page... it serves as a future log and a place for me to put down some goals I want to accomplish...

Monthly page has historically had the line calendar... I would use that because I could fit it neatly onto one half of the spread, the other half would have headers for Tasks, Income, Bills, and Credit Card and Gas Spending Trackers... I know use a google spreadsheet to track my finances, which freed up room, so now I just make a regular calendar with a task column...

Weekly spreads contain two weeks each with a small section for notes... Each day has a Header followed by 4 spaces for tasks... This is my method to prevent myself from over-committing to things.

​

If your talking about collecting information, say, about topics of interest, might I suggest making google documents about them? its pretty easy to copy and paste things to move them around until youre happy, and if you do something that you didnt actually like you can always "ctrl z" and it will go back to the way it was...

Another option could be to buy some report covers... I used to keep notes in those... its just a clear plastic folder, with a clamp on the side to hold it all together... they're available at office stores, relatively cheap, and you don't have to commit to a page order...

https://www.amazon.com/Transparent-Swing-Three-Color-Button/dp/B07DN8X8DS/ref=sr_1_2_sspa?keywords=report+cover&qid=1570421214&sr=8-2-spons&psc=1&spLa=ZW5jcnlwdGVkUXVhbGlmaWVyPUExWE9VVDlQMEkyVjlJJmVuY3J5cHRlZElkPUEwNTA0NzY3STlLTVBEOFhHWVpBJmVuY3J5cHRlZEFkSWQ9QTA0ODQ4OTExNDBXUFc3WDUzVDNRJndpZGdldE5hbWU9c3BfYXRmJmFjdGlvbj1jbGlja1JlZGlyZWN0JmRvTm90TG9nQ2xpY2s9dHJ1ZQ==

I hope something here was helpful

Hiya,

ok so ive put together a bunch of amazon link of what you need (US amazon as im in the UK)

Raspberry PI B+:

http://www.amazon.com/Raspberry-Pi-Model-512MB-Computer/dp/B00LPESRUK/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1458167372&sr=8-3&keywords=raspberry+pi+b%2B


Case:

http://www.amazon.com/Mudder-Protective-Cover-Screw-Raspberry/dp/B01AVT9IWK/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1458167372&sr=8-2-spons&keywords=raspberry+pi+b%2B&psc=1


Snes Style USB Controller:

http://www.amazon.com/Retro-Nintendo-Controller-Windows-Purple/dp/B016MEFRFU/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1458167421&sr=8-4&keywords=usb+sneshttp://www.amazon.com/Retro-Nintendo-Controller-Windows-Purple/dp/B016MEFRFU/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1458167421&sr=8-4&keywords=usb+snes


HDMI Cable:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00870ZHCQ?psc=1&redirect=true&ref_=ox_sc_act_title_3&smid=ATVPDKIKX0DER


MicroUSB Power Supply:

http://www.amazon.com/NorthPada%C2%AE-Charger-Raspberry-Android-Samsung/dp/B00OY7HR1U/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1458167495&sr=8-4&keywords=micro+usb+2a

8GB SD Card:

http://www.amazon.com/SanDisk-Memory-SDSDUN-008G-G46-Newest-Version/dp/B00M55BS5O/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1458167735&sr=8-2&keywords=8gb+sd

SDHC Card Reader:

http://www.amazon.com/Transcend-Information-Card-Reader-TS-RDF5K/dp/B009D79VH4/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1458167758&sr=8-1&keywords=sdhc+reader


All together that comes to $75 and will play games from the Atari, NES, SNES, Master System, Genesis, Gameboy etc. If you buy that SD card then I have an 8Gb image file already put together for it with over 4000 games that I could put up for you to download, you then just write it to the SD card, pop it in the Pi and plug it in, it will auto boot to a nice menu controlled by the control pad, select your game and play, then just press "Start + Select" to go back to the menu to select another game/system. It's very easy to use as all the hard work of aquiring the games and artwork has already been done.

You can get the more powerful Pi 2 or 3 and a bigger MicroSD to have more roms but that pushes the price up and will need more work to setup.

I have aspergers and my wife is type one so I understand some of the difficulties your son faces, I hope you can use this to help make him happy. My sister has an autistic son also and I put together one of these and he loves it, she got him to write a one sentence review and score out of 10 for each game. It became something they could do together and talk about, and also helped to convince him to do things liek help with cleaning his room etc so that he could do "one more review before bed" as she thinks it important to always push him that little bit to give him the best chances later on in life.

Anyway, here is a video showing the system in use so you can see what you think:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PDWebx6D2Zc

Also with the addition of another SD card, usb keyboard and mouse and it also works as a computer with web browsing and programming tools for kids (Scratch).

Hope this helps, let us know if you want the 8Gb SD card image uploaded for you to download (not to be re-distributed though)

Regards

DJH

I hate sounds so here’s what I devised:

Musicians Ear plugs:

Pros: easy to hide, cut sounds well
Cons: uncomfortable for long periods of time, easy to lose.

Low profile ear muffs:

Pros: best thing for cutting all sounds, impossible to loose or break
Cons: not super comfortable with glasses, very obvious.

Sound cancelling headphones;

Pros; you can hear conversations super well but it blocks out the back ground sound, you can also play music to cut out all sound, socially acceptable, the most comfortable solution.
Cons: very expensive for good ones, they use batteries, they are fragile, they don’t cut out as much sound as ear muffs

I own all three of these. I wear sound cancelling her phones all day and at social events such as a diner or party since I can easily have conversations with them, I used ear plugs at fancy events or places that I don’t want people to look at me or ask me why I’m wearing ear protections (ear plugs are also tiny and great to bring as an emergency back up) and I wear ear muffs in class. I will link the best of all of these:

Sound cancelling I used, they are good but use aaa batteries instead of recharging them with USB: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00M1NEUKK/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_IbIHDb74TF6XZ

Sound cancelling of the latest and best technology (almost double the price but they are worth it if you have the cash): Black https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0756CYWWD/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_7cIHDbGR2SXTV

Low profile ear muffs of high quality (they are on sale
Right now too!): https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06VWJL9LG/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_xeIHDb94GJN4V

Any “musicians ear plugs” will work but apparently these are the best ones: www.amazon.com/dp/B018WPOQSG/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_YfIHDbZ20X0Q4

There is a great little book called, A Cartoon Guide to Physics. Explains all sorts of phenomena, of the kind one typically encounters in an intro college class, but fun and accessible. I used it to supplement my teaching when teaching college kids, and they loved it. I think it would be very appropriate for a gifted child; it isn't at a very high level and is easy to understand. The cartoons are great and the physical principles are sound. I think it is the sort of thing he might look at again and again and get more out of it with each reading. Apparently this author had also done such a guide with genetics, but I haven't personally read it and can't vouch. I 'd go with the basic physics guide as many experiments and principles are easy to verify for himself---no special lab equipment needed. If the child is interested in science, by all means spark his imagination with various books, but also take the opportunity if you can to teach him about the scientific method and how to conduct experiments, even if it is just at the 'gee whiz' level.


EDIT: http://www.amazon.com/Cartoon-Guide-Physics-Larry-Gonick/dp/0062731009

Hey, I'm really sorry that I took so long to reply, I just kept overthinking my reply, so I'm just gonna do it

So actually the book is on anxiety and stress management, and it holds so much information throughout the book about how our minds are wired. Throughout it you gain more and more understanding of how you work and it really does help to have that level of awareness. I mean it's invaluable to gain such a comprehension of inner workings, in fact it works towards a mastery of yourself. That's what I got from the book but it also helped me realize to seek that kind of understanding in whatever I happen to be looking for or struggling with.

Boundaries, however, I got from a man named John Bradshaw, I happen to have had access to some of his lectures which are all amazing and fantastic, but that helped me to see that I completely had things undeveloped in that respect. That's the kicker there as well, it's undeveloped.

On assertiveness, a lot of that were people saying that I was too nice, well, specifically my mother telling me that I was too nice, and I'm super happy she said that because that really opened my eyes. Down the line, Jordan B Peterson's lectures on YouTube helped greatly with countless things, and also assertiveness.

Growing up in a dysfunctional family and dealing with enmeshment, unhealthy relationships, not being able to tell yourself from a stranger, etc. Identity has always been an issue, and in many ways I've known it needed to be developed but, like for all of these things, there's always a catalyst, you know that. Anyways, looking into the subreddit for OCD and the description there really spelled it out for me in a way I hadn't considered before.

Yeah those burnouts man, and starting over, I think it's often because it's hard to move onward and outward from a pattern, especially a pattern of thinking. You're often met with depression at those moments, and one of the reasons you feel depression is because it feels like you didn't learn anything. So maybe one question is, how do you go about life and also learn from it?

I'm sorry that this all seems so all over that place and that it's also probably quite subjective to me, but another thing I've noticed is that life is a dream, and you've got to interpret it for yourself, to me that is significant to understanding yourself

This is a great post, congratulations on this new understanding about yourself, as part of an ongoing journey.

I think most of us have been forced by our circumstances to become at least instinctive experts on burn out.

Before my diagnosis, I burned out badly at work and home, in retrospect it's obvious how big a role my traits played in that process.

Some of the cure is autism specific, I do think stimming should become more socially permissible over time to support mental health of autistics, that said I personally do still elect to mask a lot, particularly at work.

You can go a long way by accessing quality thought in the area of burn out management, even if it isn't autism specific, though that understanding is still a crucial factor. Keep looking and make sure you wind up seeing a clinical psychologist whose practice specializes in autism, though I understand if that seems like a stretch in the near term.

My recovery began when I read Peak Performance by Brad Stulberg and Steve Magness, because the whole book is about the ways people avoid burn out even while still pushing themselves to perform at their best.

Actually, I largely wasn't reading non-essential books at that point, but I could still listen to it on Audible during my daily commute.

In my experience as one of those folks with late diagnoses who may attract the problematic "high functioning" label, we do have to push ourselves to avoid backsliding, it's the burn-out management that is the missing piece.

I burned out because I didn't want to compromise. I needed the understanding I got from that book to give myself permission to rest, because it was the most productive course of action. Please do check it out. I recommend the Audible version, if that works for you.

Just as one more thing, I personally found noise sensitivity to be a huge thing for me. On occasions when my defenses are already low, noise is the easiest thing to push me into a shutdown (internalized meltdown). Thus, I found even when no one else was accommodating me, self accommodation with noise management was a huge factor. In the past I sometimes did this with earbuds or earplugs. Noise cancelling headphones are amazing, these days I use and recommend the benefits of a flagship model, for purchasing now that would be the Bose noise cancelling headphone 700. My older Sony WX-1000XM2 is also very good.

If you think noise cancelling headphones aren't practical choice at work where you need them most, I get that. Maybe then you need a discreet option. Check out the Vibes earplugs.

Well, I'm 33 and I am still afraid of the dark.

A nightlight can be helpful, or leaving a light on outside your bedroom like a hallway light (that's what I've always done).

When I stay at my Uncle's cabin, I use a night light, and we have these speakers that light up that we got from The Source, I don't even play music on them, just use them for the light, and also a solar camping light thing...it's pretty dark in there but those make it pretty good.

These are pretty similar to the speakers I use: https://www.amazon.com/Dancing-Water-Speakers-Colors-Vary/dp/B00KOSU4UO/ref=pd_sbs_23_22?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=B00KOSU4UO&pd_rd_r=3fa3f279-61bc-4ed3-a99d-0365a7690bea&pd_rd_w=gQaoQ&pd_rd_wg=LvEcU&pf_rd_p=52b7592c-2dc9-4ac6-84d4-4bda6360045e&pf_rd_r=ZN5JVZH543MN39KHNE76&psc=1&refRID=ZN5JVZH543MN39KHNE76

​

This is pretty similar to the solar light thing: https://www.amazon.ca/MPOWERD-Luci-Original-Inflatable-Features/dp/B074NMPPVK/ref=sr_1_26?dchild=1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI0dmlyIOl5QIVE8pkCh0lXgXFEAAYASAAEgJ0zvD_BwE&hvadid=208286042121&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9001501&hvnetw=g&hvpos=1t1&hvqmt=e&hvrand=8990635683068546111&hvtargid=kwd-297008297208&hydadcr=9076_9441679&keywords=solar+camping+lights&psc=1&qid=1571374879&sr=8-26

YES, YES, AND MORE YES!

I know exactly what you are talking about. Ughh. The sounds are unbearable. Here's what I recommend for that. In Walmart, you can buy these little pill cases: https://www.amazon.com/Pill-Container-Dose-Daily-Round/dp/B01CQOU39U/ref=sr_1_26_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1536962147&sr=8-26&keywords=pill+case+round

Get those and some earplugs to go in them. Carry them with you always. I've been doing it for a year now and my blood pressure has gone way down.

Best of luck friend.

If you haven't already then I can totally recommend you read "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie, it's an old book but brilliant, easy to read, and helped me a lot with understanding people and how they think.


 

Edit: A version of this book appears to be shared under Public Domain on archive.org, and is free to download in EPUB format if you are interested in checking it out.

Hiya, That all rings a bell of some sort with me (having to get it together and doing it, don't fuss). Taking a bit longer view on the matter, there is a point where things can get to be "too much", and because of the invisibility of ASC (for the most part) and the encouragement for masking and so on, sometimes called ableism, I think, there may come a time to be aware that "this wave is not my wave to ride, it will simply sink me or keep me sunk". Folks don't get the "unevenness" bit about ASC, where somebody may be able to do arithmetic but not keep the financial books, etc. It's tough to explain and it can vary over time, given whatever else is going on in one's life. Kudos to 33yo Dad, hope he is able to maintain throughout at this level of competence! It may not be that way forever for everyone with ASC, no matter how much effort one puts in. At some point, being kind to oneself (and those around one), by rounding up help, may be appropriate.

To that end I point out this book which made a huge difference for me when I got to the point in life where "downsizing" became the present reality, like it or not. This book is really empowering, to know that when "autistic burnout" or "autistic inertia" come over one, there is the possibility of assistance. Being able to round up what you need, even if you cannot explain to people WHY you cannot do x, y or z yourself, is useful, in my experience.

https://www.amazon.com/Caregivers-Personal-Assistants-Manage-People/dp/0962110612

I don't have a recommendation for you (although my razor kraken headphones are surprisingly decent at blocking out noise), but have you tried silicone earplugs?

These are what I use.

I actually found them recommended on a different subreddit and they really help. I didn't think I could find any comfortable earplugs either but they're small enough for my ears and for the most part help me tune out high frequency noises.

It's really great for me because I can wear them at the movie theater and not get hearing damage for the most part (movies are 80 dB SPL now-a-days, maybe even louder. Any exposure to that or higher sound level can cause hidden hearing loss called synaptopathy). I think in general the silicone earplugs block out the higher frequencies but also block out everything else, but slightly less. So wearing them, your hearing sounds relatively normal, at least for me compared to other ear plugs I've looked at.

If you haven't tried silicone earplugs I'd say they're a good alternative, and don't make you look weird. I carry mine in my pocket just in case, easy to carry.

It's not a book pertaining exactly to AS or neurodiversity, but I've been reading Where Good Ideas Come From by Steve Johnson. It's a fantastic book which explores how creativity is a function of the mind.

Here's what I think can help you. There isn't really a good solution for you that isn't hard to do. I got my own room over time by convincing my parents. There are some things you can do.

• Get noise cancelling headphones and/or earmuffs and/or earplugs. These will MASSIVELY help with overwhelming sound. I recommend these. Active noise cancelling headphones are a bit expensive, but they are definitely worth it.
  
  $350 Bose QC 35
  
  $350, $298, Sony WH1000XM2
  
  $250 Sony XB950N1
  
  $30 earmuffs - these are cheap and block out noise.
  
  
• When your dad is not in his room, go to his room. When I had the loft as my room, I often took the laptop computer to my parents' room to use it. Although you can't bring your entire room there, you should bring things in your dad's room while he's not using it. If you can't do this, reply to me.
  
  
• Convince your dad to switch rooms. This is harder to do. Figure out all the reasons why it's more important for you to have the bedroom. Tell him how Asperger's makes it incredibly difficult to even think without a room and if you do get a room, you'll be able to find a job and move out quicker. He doesn't need to have walls around his room just because he's the owner of the house.
  
  
• If you have a therapist or psychologist, tell them about your situation and how bad it is on you and your mental health. It's not healthy to have auditory problems and be the one person who has to deal with a situation that would be bad if they have auditory problems. If you don't have a therapist, please get one as soon as you can.
  
  
• This is the best solution but the hardest one to do. Move out. Find a job that's feasable to get (you have the requirements to get it and it's a job that wouldn't be torture for someone with Asperger's). I know this is hard, especially when you have no time to relax and feel fine. But once you do it, you'll be on a path to eventually be able to rent a space on your own. Maybe even find a relative or a friend that is willing to share an apartment or space with you as long as you get your own room. This will usually require you to pay a fraction of the rent of the space.
  
  The advice is very hard to follow, so take it a step at a time. Get headphones or ear mufflers first which will be a huge improvement to your mind if you don't already have active noise cancelling headphones. Remember to get active noise cancelling headhones because they really block out the noise. Then try to start using your dad's room to do things, which will probably work. You're limited in what you can do in someone elses room, but your mind is more free. Then try to convince your dad to switch rooms, which may or may not work. If it doesn't work, tell a therapist or psychologist about your problem. I don't know the best advice for you, which is why you should see one of those professionals. The ultimate goal is to move out because that will really free up your life.
  
  I still think it would be good to answer these questions. Are the auditory problems caused more by ambient noise or voices, or the feeling of having no barrier around you or something else or multiple things? Do you only live with yourself and your dad? Does your dad know and accept that you have Asperger's? Realistically, a lot of this advice won't work. Please reply to me with what happens when you try these solutions.

My mom is like this, I spent a lot of time on /raisedbynarcissists. I definitely thought she had a Cluster B Personality Disorder. Now, I'm not so sure. I wonder if she has autism. My son does and I'm pursuing a diagnosis.

I wonder if she's really enabling because she just doesn't get your cues that you want to do something by yourself?

You might like this book. It has a slight Christian side to it but I am not Christian and it didn't bother me. I felt like it was really valuable for me in putting some distance between my mom and I.

https://www.amazon.ca/Boundaries-When-Take-Control-Your/dp/1480554979

You seem distressed.

i can recommend this look, i put this to practice years ago even thou i only read this book a few days ago.

Stop, giving, a, fuck.

Chill out, stop being down. stop caring about what others think. you don't have the mental energy to deal with the world, or so it seems like.

Stop caring, really, just stop.

Get a job, if its a low wage one. start making money, start chatting with your co-workers. get some hobbies that'll force you to be with people. karatee, hockey, football, whatever.

Its not going to be easy. but do it.

https://www.amazon.com/Subtle-Art-Not-Giving-Counterintuitive-ebook/dp/B019MMUA8S

I can also recommend finding your ' quiet place '. a place in some forest or perhaps just some corner in a local park you like.

Also, remember, you're just 19, you are barely a grown up yet. life is difficult and for someone with a disability its never going to be easy. but make it easier for yourself if it even means making some sacrifices in one way or the other. you have at least 45 years left on this planet, make them comfy for your own sake.

This is good stuff. Mind Mapping is mentioned. Try MindJet MindManager and see if you like it. Also when I had difficulties I would also go online and look through free courses or youtube videos to find better explanations.

Also this Cartoon Series helps, heres the Cartoon Guide to Physics:
http://www.amazon.com/Cartoon-Guide-Physics-Larry-Gonick/dp/0062731009/

yeah if the training isn't an option, this book on setting healthy boundaries might be a good alternative.
http://www.amazon.com/Boundaries-When-Take-Control-Your/dp/1480554979

Warning, it does have some religious overtones, but to be honest, I think that is actually helpful in this type of book since some people tend to cross boundaries when it comes to how they interpret religion.

I have also dabbled a bit with NLP - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neuro-linguistic_programming

Read a few books on the topic and use some of the techniques to influence my thinking and to try and interpret others.

Four good ones:

The Art of the Deal by Donald Trump & Tony Schwartz
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
The Big Short by Michael Lewis
With Liberty and Justice for Some by Glen Greenwald

Two shitty ones (edit: yet still important to read):

The Rage Against God by Peter Hitchens
The Portable Atheist by Christopher Hitchens

Amazon has pages like this:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1934575283/ref=mp_s_a_1_4?qid=1457934304&sr=8-4&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=aspergers+on+the+job&dpPl=1&dpID=51%2B3A9qVVTL&ref=plSrch

but I don't recommend buying all the books. If you have reading time, maybe get them at the library, but I think at best they are going to expand on the information in the Temple Grandin article at the ARI 'site.

I wish I could explain it better than this book I've been reading. Don't get me wrong, I haven't perfected anything from it and it's difficult as hell for me; But ever since I started reading it, I'll notice situations where it applies during or after they happen and the awareness is exciting. I see you mentioned philosophy, I feel Socrates would know just how to help you if you kept him on your shoulder in these situations. Good luck!

If you want to focus on facial expressions I can recommend the following:

> Personally I love the work of Paul Ekman. His book "Emotions Revealed" taught me how to interpret and fake facial expressions.
> I stumbled across it because of the TV series "Lie to Me", which should be based on his work/life.

> There are great books about body language, too.

Asperger Syndrome and Anxiety: A Guide to Successful Stress Management by nick dubin
https://www.amazon.com/Asperger-Syndrome-Anxiety-Successful-Management/dp/184310895X

Shadow Syndromes: The Mild Forms of Major Mental Disorders That Sabotage Us
https://www.amazon.com/Shadow-Syndromes-Mental-Disorders-Sabotage/dp/0553379593

And I'm currently reading 'the autism revolution' which is starting out pretty helpful. The library has got some good stuff. I've been going to several different libraries as their selections vary.

Temple Grandin is a prominent author in the autistic area. She leans heavily on her own experience, is tinged with her viewpoints, but it's good to read about aspergers and all that lot.

Hopefully you at least know about Developing Talents. If you live near a community college, it might not cost much to switch careers.

These help me a lot.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0044DEESS/

These earplugs might help. I use them at work because I work with loud equipment but still need to hear when people talk to me. They are used mostly by musicians so maybe they can work here too.

Glad you had a good time! [I had these] (http://www.amazon.com/Etymotic-Research-ETY-Plugs-Protection-Earplugs/dp/B0044DEESS) when I went to a show last Friday, and they turned what would have been a night of pain and exhaustion into one of the highlights of my life. I suggest you get a pair.

Here is the desktop version of your link