(Part 2) Best products from r/confession

Hey man, I went through this exact same thing with my first relationship. Together for ~1.5 years. I was a lot more caring when we first started but I changed into someone who thought it was acceptable to take advantage of the time and energy of the people who are closest to me. So, she left me. Sometimes it takes losing the people we care about most for us to change.

The important part is that you recognize that you need to change. The only person in this world you can control is yourself. I'm sure you're walking through an emotional minefield right now. So, remain honest with yourself and with your SO and above all, be kind. It can be a habit for us to make others feel bad because we feel bad. Along the lines of "I want to make you feel the way I feel". It's selfish behaviour masked by a whole bunch of confusing emotions. It takes a much stronger person to feel bad and still care about how someone else feels.

It took me longer to get over my ex girlfriend than length of our relationship. The guilt and shame will hurt for a good long while, so remember these feelings. It will get easier but you need to allow yourself to change and be vulnerable.

You'll be a better person for it and this relationship and all your future relationships will be stronger because of it.

I recommend you grab a copy of this book. It helped me work through really difficult emotions and frame them in an honest and self-improving way. The journey's not easy but it's worthwhile. Good luck dude.

This is the only one of these comments I'm going to respond to, because I wrote this three days ago, for ONE PERSON, and all you /r/bestof armchair jackasses can seriously take a flying fucking leap 'cuz I've got a shuttle to watch, but since I said one let's break it down:

>We face unique problems today, namely the fact that we've expanded pretty much to the limit of what the natural world can support, particularly in terms of energy.

This is not unique. This has been argued since Malthus 200+ years ago. The current world-is-ending fad dates to The Limits to Growth, a book published 40 years ago. Thing about LtG, though, is it used computer simulations and five scenarios to run some numbers and put some math to the problem. One of their models appears to be pretty close to what's happened but even the Club of Rome doesn't think it's spot-fucking-on. So while people who actually study this stuff think that there are conclusions to be drawn and problems to solve, they

a) are hardly settled on the scope of the issue or approaches to take

b) don't insist that high school kids worried about WWIII focus on it.

>This pretty much guarantees that the economy will stop growing and begin to contract in the near future

Economies have been expanding and contracting throughout history. Rogoff and Reinhart make a pretty compelling case that we're in uncharted territory but nobody - nobody is proclaiming the end of the world except wise-cracking Keyboard Kommandos such as yourself.


>Our currencies, which are now all but entirely fiat, are only designed to work in an expanding economy

This is a nonsensical statement unworthy of rebuttal. If you can HFT Forex, currencies are not "entirely flat."

>So the OP is right, I believe, to fear a financial collapse, as it is more or less a mathematical certainty at this point.

This isn't about whether or not the OP is right or wrong, this is giving OP tools to deal with his anxiety. As I hope is becoming clear, I feel myself qualified to do so. I cannot say the same for you.

>WWIII? Who knows.

Who knows? Most people. People who have studied the problem. My statement (no heavy combatants in 70 years) is factual. Your deflection is speculative and does not add to the conversation.

>I haven't even mentioned global warming, which is way more depressing if you follow the science to its logical conclusion.

GLOBAL WARMING WAS NOT LISTED AS A CONCERN BY OP.

We could talk science there, too. I've studied the problem to my satisfaction. Have you? Or are you just waving your hands?

>I don't advise the OP to lie awake at night worrying, but I don't think anyone should assume the future will be like the past just because it has been before.

Who are you making your point to? What I said is that by and large, the world is in pretty good shape. What you said is "WWIII? Who knows."

>If you wanna talk about history, though, remember that every empire in history has fallen.

OP did not say "I'm worried about my empire." He said "I'm worried about WWIII." I've worked with a number of talented and skilled ex-Soviet scientists and regime members. They're all doing fine, CCCP-be-damned.

>Don't waste your time worrying. Prepare for what you can prepare for and let fate handle the rest.

Got it. You just wanted to listen to yourself talk.

Hey, /r/bestof friend: This question was asked, and answered handily by a number of erudite people other than myself, three days ago. This is a quiet place, a respectful place, and the situation is handled. Now do everyone a solid and keep your muddy boots off this holy place. And tell all your friends. There's nothing quite like a default sub coming in and retconning a sensitive discussion because every worldly 15-year-old needs to hear himself type.

If you don't want to get rid of them for yourself... get rid of them for your family. They are EASILY spread between family members, especially if you're itching them... as you clearly are.

If you're a girl... they can spread to your vagina, and cause a whole lot of other problems. Either way they can actually eventually spread to your urethra and cause other problems like frequent urination, itching and swelling.

If you go into the doctor they can prescribe a medication that you will take when you pick it up, as well as 2 weeks from the day you initially took the first medication.

GOOD NEWS!!: Over the Counter Pinworm Treatment, you don't even have to go to the doctor. Reeses Pinworm Medicine
as well as Pin-X

For the love of all that is good, please go to amazon and get one... if you can't afford it, send me a private message with a link to your amazon wishlist (that has your blocked out address etc) and I would be more then happy to send one to you.

Just thinking about this makes me itch all over.

ZC,

First off, takes gutz to admit you might have gotten in over your head.

Second, it sounds like you are a pretty serious paintoy. I would recommend joining a community of like-minded peeps, like People Exchanging Power (ask google for a city chapter near you) for instance, The Cage or Fet Life.

Third, it sounds like your top / dom has lost your trust. A good bottom / sub knows how to trust her instincts, and avoid anyone that has lost touch with the boundaries of civil behavior. Vote with your feet, and PERMA-BLOCK HIM.

Fourth, keep looking. You will find someone out there that understands and cherishes you. Someone that is capable of meeting ALL of your needs. (I did!) When you find that person, start slow next time. For instance, try buying them this book.

Here's a good book too! Or two. Or four! No More Mister nice guy + The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck + You Are a Badass + Declutter your Mind

They all will apply to Men or Women and are full of great advice and insights! E books available for cheap too. Suppose you can pirate them if you don't have the funds :)

Much love, hit me up if you need some friendly advice! I have been through a lot and am only now seeking what I feel I deserve in life :D

Read this
http://www.amazon.com/SOME-MORE-PERFECT-THAN-OTHERS/dp/055327452X

People put too much thought into cheating. You always have more than one partner in your life. You may have the one you are intimate with, the best friend you use for intellectual stimulation, another to support you emotionally. You will never find one person to fulfill every need. Just because you are physical with only one person does not mean you are not cheating. So kindly get your high horse, I applaud this woman for finding happiness. Isn't that the core of life your pursuit of happiness. One day your SO wont be there or you wont and you'll just move on, They are just another body occupying space.

Well since you're cousins maybe make a special effort to make the "normal" sibling feel appreciated. Play games with him, hang out with him, let him know he's loved and appreciated too. Also you could read the book The Other One about being the normal sibling in a family with a physically/mentally/emotionally damaged sibling. Parents sometimes don't have a choice but to give the "needy" child a lot of attention, but if they aren't cognizant of the needs of their other children, they could wind up feeling the way I described in my post. 0/10 would not recommend.

I'd also suggest maybe buying small gifts the "normal" kid would enjoy but I can see that leading to parents being pissy about both kids not getting things. I dunno how old you are but I would just say take some time and spend it with the cousin you see struggling. He probably feels resentment and anger at always seeming to come in second, despite being the one without the problem. Taking some time out of your day to take him to the park, or play a game with him, or go for ice cream or something once in awhile, just you two, will make him feel special and like someone is paying attention to his needs too.

You sound like a very caring person and your cousin is lucky to have you.

This is over-simplified. For instance, one study measured the testosterone of people in various professions and you know which group had the most? Actors. The group most likely to contain more femme-presenting gay dudes. (If I can find this, I'll come back and link.)

People misinterpret the influence testosterone and estrogen have on us. Yes, they certainly have an effect, but the effects can't be put into such narrow boxes when it comes to preferences and personality (as opposed to physical effects which are easier to measure).

Confidence is a trait often associated with testosterone, for instance, and one can argue it takes confidence to openly express your desire for the taboo.

Edit: Couldn't find the exact study, but I highly recommend this book, which I believe references it - https://www.amazon.com/Heroes-Rogues-Lovers-Testosterone-Behavior/dp/0071357394/ref=sr_1_fkmr1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1376755262&sr=8-1-fkmr1&keywords=james+dabs+testosterone

Firstly, don't beat yourself up about it, now you know the truth and thankfully that your insecurities were deceiving. You can use this to establish an "autopilot" to use, reassure yourself and remember that when insecure thoughts enter your head, that things aren't that way in reality. This could be her telling the truth in this situation, remembering that she doesn't do that anymore, or a situation where you have truly felt that she loves you back. That is the reality of things.
....
For clarification, the term "autopilot" is from The Chimp Paradox by Prof Steven Peters. You may find it useful in taking control of destructive thoughts.

["Autopilots are all the positive, constructive beliefs, behaviours and automatic functioning that help us to be successful and happy in life. Autopilots could include, for example: riding a bike; staying calm when something goes wrong; focusing on solutions rather than problems; tying a shoelace; being organised and disciplined as a routine; having a positive self-image."] (http://mindfuldiscipline.blogspot.co.uk/2014/03/mindfulness-and-chimp-paradox.html)

I always fall over myself to recommend Bravetart by Stella Parks to people who haven't baked much. The recipes are as close to foolproof as possible. The ingredients and directions are very specific so, provided you follow them, you'll get a good result. Like, a really good result. I can't think of anything in that book that won't knock your socks off, and there are tons of variations - including gluten free versions of basically everything.

Some of the stuff is easier, and some of it's harder - the latter mostly by dint of taking longer or having more steps rather than needing learned technique.

I'm a good cook, though not a talented baker by any stretch. Before that book, most of my tries at baking ended up with me swearing at dough, but that book has let me make all sorts of totally delicious stuff for work bake sales, friends' birthdays and just for my own face on a rainy day.

I suck at helping depressed people, but I want to try it anyway, another perspective can't hurt.

"Should see myself as important and how it hurts people around me" sounds about dumbest thing I ever heard.

I don't see myself as important at all, and I don't think I should worry about people around me at all if I am not happy myself first. You just even can't possibly love them without loving yourself first and utmost. I wouldn't even want to see myself as important because that would imply expectations, of others, about me. It's about what they want. That is them, saying to me: you don't get to do what you want and we don't care really. We want you to think that you are important and work for us. First pep talk to your employee who you are about to screw over. "You are important to us, you know."
Me NOT CARING what other people think, is what gives me great joy, fun, creativity and liberty in life. And I usually end up doing the right thing anyway and not just for me. I would be extremely unhappy and depressed if I ever wasted my time on how other people see me or how I make them feel. Meet Richard Feynman. He was just about happiest, smartest and most productive and "important" guy ever lived (Reddit darling too of course). Never thought he was "important" for one second. Not even when receiving Nobel, he despised any such "honorary" clubs. He was expected many things many times of many people - never cared one bit! http://www.amazon.com/What-Care-Other-People-Think/dp/0393320928

I have this. Saved my family a huge hassle after getting sideswiped. Cop saw the footage at the scene and laughed, "well that makes this easy. You're in the clear". Insurance company laughed with basically the same statement when I filed my claim. Definitely worth it and honestly makes me drive even better knowing it works both ways.

Rexing V1 Car Dash Cam 2.4" LCD FHD 1080p 170 Degree Wide Angle Dashboard Camera Recorder with Sony Exmor Video Sensor, G-Sensor, WDR, Loop Recording https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00X528FNE/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_7tk6CbGXPC1FF

First I'd like to recommend this book. It made a huge difference in my relationships and understanding of my children.

Next, I am seeing a lot of posts about ADHD. Don't put a label on your child. You may need to seek professional help for her, and they may come up with a diagnosis, but until that time comes she's your little girl and you main job is to love her, not put a label on her. Also keep in mind, if you go looking for a diagnosis, you're likely to get one.

Third keep in mind teachers are people too. Some teachers will just "get" your little girl better than others. You may want to talk with other teachers your child has contact with (music, art, and physical education) are they having similar problems? If not you have two options. Leave her in the class she is in to teach her some life lessons on learning to deal with people you don't necessarily like, or roll the dice and have her moved to a new class and take your chances with a new teacher.

Lastly, you're doing better than you think.

I don't think you "let her" do anything. A person is responsible for his or her own choices when it comes to suicide. You would do yourself a great favor by finding some short-term counseling, I think.

I also highly recommend reading Kay Redfield Jamison's amazing book Night Falls Fast: Understanding Suicide. I believe it could go a long way toward helping you cope with your loss.

A NYT review.

All my best wishes to you

(edit: forgot a letter)

For the blood on the shirt, there's stuff you can buy at petsmart, or any pet store, really, in the reptiles aisle. Its called Fluker's. Not sure how it'll work on old blood, but I've used it to get blood out of my shirts a million times. its a little pricey, but a little goes a long way.

As for the cutting, I don't know :( /u/helloiloveu had a pretty good idea with the rubber band, I think.. If you don't remember doing it, that's highly concerning. does your friend know anything? or is there anyone you can stay with in case it happens again?

Ninja edit, added an amazon link to Fluker's

I’ve never heard of anyone getting a moldy Arizona, but I’ve heard of numerous kids needing medical care after consuming moldy or contaminated pouches.

They’re super pricey per lb of food too.

You can buy a reusable pouch and fill it with jarred applesauce or homemade smoothies. :) They even have a more adult-appropriate 16oz size 😉

It a good thing that you could talk yourself out of it. And that was very brave of you to think about tibet and making such a sacrifice for them, but there are better ways to do things. Maybe you can pour in your passion by writing a book about your experiences. There have been a lot of memoirs lately like I am Malala, Orange is the New Black.