(Part 2) Best products from r/daddit

My grandfather, who was more of a parent to me than either of my parents, died shortly before my son's first birthday.

I had planned to see him in August of 2016 then wife and I had big job changes and a move and I told him I was pushing back the date until mid September. Then I spoke to him the 3rd week of August and he sounded terrible. I flew with my then 11 month old boy to see him. Grandpa was incredibly weak and slept much of the time and we only got a couple hours each day with him. It made my grandfather so happy to see my little boy; his only great-grandchild.

Two weeks later he died. If I had waited until it was "convenient" we would have missed him. I regret not spending even more time with him. My plan had been to make our move then spend much of the Fall with him because I quit working and was taking a semester off of school as we settled into our new location. I thought I had more time.

However, I am thankful for the couple trips we did see him and the photos we have make me happy and teary every time I see them.

Basically, spend as much time with your son and father as you can. Even if it causes stress or difficulty, acknowledge how little time you have. You'll be thankful you did. And your son won't remember any of it but you can take photos and tell him stories about your dad down the road. And hopefully you'll take solace in that you helped a dying man be a little bit happier. It's still hard, but that helps.

I also recommend Ira Byock's The Four Things That Matter Most

The last interaction I ever had with my grandfather, he told me I was always his favorite person. My family was cold and distant and things like "I love you," were never said. I realized in retrospect that's what he was telling me in that moment and I deeply regret not telling him how much I loved him. He knew, in a way, because I would call and visit, and made me caring obvious but verbalizing these things is very powerful. Even if not for him, telling him I loved him would have been better for me. So keep that in mind.

Hey, congratulation.

The only book that I read is this one. What to Expect the First Year. http://www.amazon.ca/What-Expect-First-Heidi-Murkoff/dp/0761152121
Thats is the only one that I used.

It's pretty rough the first months, but how fun. You are tired as hell, but also happy. Ask for help from your relatives and friends. My mother in law prepared us couple of meals to help us.
Sleep when your baby sleeps :)


Everything depends on kind of baby you have.
My daughter was pretty active. up every 45-60 min for food/diaper for the first 2 months(poor wife), then every 2-3 hours . 1st full night at 8months. VS my friend's daughter. wake up every 4 hours since day 1. full night sleep at 2 months.

Get the following:

• Happiest Baby on the Block: great descriptions on swaddling, soothing, pacifier use, nursing, etc. A lifesaver for sure.
  
  
• What to Expect: The First Year: Tons of info about everything you didn't know to even ask. Bathing the baby, sleeping schedules, nursing/bottle feeding, etc. More of a "desk reference" type book, and actually a very good bathroom read.
  
  
• The Baby Sleep Solution: Not everyone is down with this type of book, but it really helped us get ourselves and our baby on a schedule, which is vital for parents to keep them SANE.
  
  When the pediatrician comes to check in on the baby while at the hospital, ask TONS of questions. They don't mind and it will make you feel better. That's what you're paying them for!!
  
  Finally, relax and enjoy. They are tougher than they look.

Congrats! One subreddit that was super helpful for me when we found out is /r/predaddit.

As for books, I would recommend The Mayo Clinic Book, as it is waaaay less scary than the "what to expect" book.

Good luck... it's the start of the best adventure. :)

>The sterilization function on anything like that is brilliant and well worth it. I honestly never found bottle warmers any use and until I bought the Perfect prep found it easier to make bottles up by using boiling water and previously boiled water kept in the fridge. I'd make a quick spreadsheet and printed off the ratios for different volumes of bottles.

Wrea bottle warmer, you could try https://www.amazon.com/120-300ML-Bottles-Portable-Suitable-Traveling/dp/B07GDMN9R3/ref=sr_1_3?m=A1AB0DIWQYMFO7&marketplaceID=ATVPDKIKX0DER&qid=1575103350&redirect=true&s=merchant-items&sr=1-3&th=1

This is what worked for us when our son started that phase:
Hatch Baby Rest Sound Machine, Night Light and Time-to-Rise https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06XMRCC94/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_GbxZDb9NV56EZ

We programmed it to be red during his "sleeping time" and used different colors for when it was ok to get up/ask to cuddle etc, and essentially told him that when it's red it's time to stay in bed unless you have to go potty. Took a couple weeks of "your light is red, go back to bed", but then worked like a charm. Not sure if it'll work with others, just thought I'd share. Good luck!

I'm thinking teething too, but whether that's the case or not, try a mesh baby feeder -- something like this. Put some fruit in the freezer, like a bit of banana or watermelon, then when it's nice and cold, put it in the mesh feeder. If your son is teething, the cold mesh will feel great on his gums, but even if he's not, he'll get some solid food through the mesh. If he is teething, the cold will numb his gums a bit, and then he might take the bottle. This worked really well with my daughter.

[regalo super yard](Regalo 192-Inch Super Wide Adjustable Baby Gate and Play Yard, 4-In-1, Bonus Kit, Includes 4 Pack of Wall Mounts https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003VNKLIY/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_a8K0CbB3DGQMJ)

You're going to want to adjust your search terms. Look for play yard.

Please look at the specs on this one and see if it will suit.

We got something like this:
https://www.amazon.com/Regalo-192-Inch-Super-Wide-White/dp/B003VNKLIY/ref=sr_1_6_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1502910571&sr=8-6&keywords=baby+pen

Or you can combine a few of these:
https://www.amazon.com/Summer-Infant-Surround-6-Panel-PlaySafe/dp/B000G1YW98/ref=sr_1_4_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1502910571&sr=8-4&keywords=baby+pen

We put it over a foam mat and our son was happy. Eventually set him to free range once he really got moving.

Good luck.

Foam Mat:
https://www.amazon.com/ProSource-Puzzle-Alphabet-Numbers-Tiles/dp/B00DQEKHUA/ref=sr_1_4_s_it?s=baby-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1502910700&sr=1-4&keywords=baby+foam+mat

The foam mat now is being used for the slide we opted to keep inside for the occasional heart attack er. i mean fun...

One of the best books regarding debunking popular parenting myths:

Nurture Shock, by Bronson and Merryman
http://www.amazon.com/NurtureShock-New-Thinking-About-Children/dp/0446504130/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1303248620&sr=8-1

It highlights the importance of effort vs. talent, and much more. One of my favs is stressing that the brain is like a muscle, regularly working it strengthens intelligence. Kids need to work on being smart~

Awesome book for any parent.

It's amazing how some kids books can be so awful isn't it..

For me, I just can't stand Spinderella - considering Julia Donaldson does such great books normally I think she really dropped the ball on this one. I could read The Snail and the Whale on repeat, a lovely story with great rhyming...

If you want a book recommendation my absolute favorite book for those first few months was Mayo Clinic Guide to Your Baby's First Year. Since your GF already has a 3 year old you might not find it as helpful as my wife and I did but it was our absolute favorite to answer all those questions you wonder in that first year.

The piece of advice I got that was the absolute best piece I receive was to go out and do things in those first few weeks. You will be tired and a lot depends on your GF's recovery but in a lot of ways your baby will be more portable in the 6 or so weeks post birth than they will be for a long time since you can leave right after they go to sleep and they hopefully just sleep through things allowing you to eat dinner and get out of the house.

I found 3-6 months to be the most isolating time because they are aware enough to make it hard to just pack them up and go to dinner or something while they sleep but they aren't able to sit in a high chair or really entertain themselves so going out with them at that age is a real ordeal and that can become very isolating.

One of my take aways from the books was establishing connections between sleep and environment. Happiest baby recommended always using white noise for naps/sleeping because it’s soothing for babies and creates a healthy sleep association. Like being in a darkened room or swaddled. Basically you wouldn’t want to do any of these associations during alert time because it would confuse them, but naps and deep sleep you want to use similar triggers. Adding things like a bath or massage to the bedtime routine will help them learn more about the difference between naps and nighttime sleep. We use this https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06XMRCC94/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_.DJTCbAF320W2

It’s a little more expensive but has Bluetooth so I can adjust while she’s in my lap, timers, and an adjustable nightlight.

It's the Hario Skerton. I like it a lot but it doesn't work so well for courser grinds like for French press or cold brew. I think you can adapt it though but I'm no good at DIY. It's also good for a mini-bicep workout :)

Edit: grammar and formatting

This is good. If you have a small job and don't want to mix up some epoxy, JB weld might be a good option. Its simple, works well, and is cheap. Good luck!

​

https://www.amazon.com/J-B-Weld-50139-Plastic-Adhesive/dp/B01IBOK7FE/ref=asc_df_B01IBOK7FE/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=312151168520&hvpos=1o1&hvnetw=g&hvrand=5903731137153641802&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9004400&hvtargid=aud-799711277694:pla-625516023832&psc=1

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child

Tons of great info on how important sleep is to growing kiddos. Also plenty of strategies for helping your young ones sleep, and quite a few stories/testimonials from parents who have been there. Helped my wife and I with both of our kids!

We didn't exactly do "cry it out" but we roughly followed the Baby Wise (https://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Baby-Wise-Giving-Nighttime/dp/1932740139) method for sleep training.

We're not fans of co-sleeping for the obvious "rolling on top of your infant" problem---especially since we both sleep so hard. But whatever works for you. My wife and I found that method worked well, but every little one is different. :-)

If you're looking to work out or keep fit at all, check out Baby Barbells and The Art of Roughhousing. Both have some good tips for playing with your kid in ways that will benefit your health as well!

Hey! Yeah it has kinda become a series, but that is just someone piggy backing if its success. Here are the originals.

Here is the one for infants

Here is 5-12 months

I can sum up one of the most important principles for you if you don't want to buy them. Though I highly suggest you do.

At around 5-6 weeks you allow your baby to cry it out for 15 minutes max. After that you can go in and comfort the baby. This is mostly for the mother, as it is hard for the mom to do this.

Then every night you will eventually watch that 15 minutes of screaming drop to 12, then 10, then 5. Then only a minute.

This same principle then applies for older kids as they grow up and more challenges arise, like toddlers who won't stay in bed. In our experience we had to allow for them to cry and learn that they can do it and it will be ok. Eventually allowing for themselves to calm down and sleep.

We used this guy a lot. My boy didn't like it at first, but once he started getting strength in his neck where he could lift his head, he loved it.

https://www.amazon.com/Boppy-Tummy-Time-Pillow-Explorers/dp/B017TYN0KG

I do lots of stuff like this my son who is just under 3. He loves it and it's good for him. He's 35lbs! The trick is keeping it up as they grow. You can hurt your self or your kid if you aren't doing it right. Here is a good book that helps you get the job done without throwing your back out (or your kid through a window):
http://www.amazon.com/The-Art-Roughhousing-Anthony-DeBenedet/dp/1594744874/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1375909406&sr=8-1&keywords=the+art+of+roughhousing

Be Prepared Really helped me, very easy read, and filled with good tips for new dads. Congratulations!

NurtureShock is great for the overall picture of raising a kid to adulthood. Pretty scientific and very thoughtful.

The one in OP's pic looks like a Hario Skerton

There is lots of info at /r/coffee ..... my recommendation based on my research and my use is the Hario Mini. The Skerton has some downsides as compared to the mini which swayed me to the mini. It's been almost 2 years since I researched so I don't remember exactly the differences.

As for the Aeropress in OP's picture, it is a very fine coffee maker and I highly recommend it. I also highly recommend a Chemex. I use my Chemex daily and the Aeropress frequently.

/r/coffee should have all the info you need.

I wish I remembered the brand that we have. I think it might be a Regalo, because it looks a lot like this, but with a little cat door at the bottom.

The one piece of advice I would give is absolutely do no buy one like this. Those little holes will become footholds for a little one to climb over. Everyone I've known who has gotten something like that has had to replace it as soon as their child figured out how easy they are to climb. Stick with the vertical slats only - no horizontal bars except at the top and bottom.

You have gotten a lot of great advice. Here is a book that helped us with our first, when neither of us really knew what to do. It's real life advice on how to have the best first few months that you possibly can. Super quick easy read, but worth it IMO.

Happiest Baby On The Block

My favorite three were: Be Prepared, The Expectant Father, and The Dad's Guide to Pregnancy for Dummies. And for laughs, there's always The Bro Code for Parents.

What to expect

already mentioned by chuckdontSurf, a book on calming babies down

Sleeping habits

And for later, "How to raise a brighter child"

Get this book. It is a month-to-month guide for the first year. Each month is only a couple of pages, really good helpful stuff.

Seconded, and I also enjoyed The New Father - A Dad's Guide to the First Year. I liked the timeline approach and particularly the tips about what's going on with Mom along the way.

God I hate mobile reddit.

This is what I use. Cheap and effective.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00GUN3Z1W/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_iafaBbP82RW1Z

If ya wanna get fancy, these are great.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B001OC5UMQ/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_-afaBbX0TT1S0

This is the best book that helped me the most!
What to Expect - The First Year

The "What Can You Expect" series.

Also...check out The Happiest Baby on the Block this DVD will seriously help to teach you how to calm a crying baby and will save your sanity/sleep.

Edit: Seriously...the methods can look really dumb, and you assume it's fake, but the 5 S's he teaches are like magic.

We bought this:

https://smile.amazon.com/Regalo-192-Inch-Super-Adjustable-Mounts/dp/B003VNKLIY?sa-no-redirect=1

I can't recommend it enough. We have a step like that too leading to our family room. It creates a natural support for the giant baby gate. We still had to anchor it into a stud for our little Bam Bam, but it keeps him contained to one room.

I highly recommend the dvd or instant video version of this, helped us with our newborn almost instantly!

Usually one of these will work for me, after 3 kids:

1. Fill up the bathtub (or kitchen sink) with warm water, and throw them in.
   
2. Midnight stroller or car ride, with the windows down in summer.
   
3. These with ice or soft fruit.

We used these. It's a compression fit. Our little one likes to pull and try to climb it, but so far it hasn't budged. I've even ran into it in the night and it didn't move. (I'm a pretty big dude) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B001OC5UMQ/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_apa_i_8zbYDbF7B2JB3

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/1932740139/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1521941312&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=babywise+giving+your+infant+the+gift+of+nighttime+sleep&dpPl=1&dpID=41JKJto2VXL&ref=plSrch

Your welcome.

I don't see on here anything about not doing that. A baby at 8 months old is not ready to chew things like food let alone celery. I know it is scary but if this is your first you don't do that they have to learn how to process the chewing and drinking that is why there are training cups and teething things you can throw mushy juicy fruit and veg in that they can naw on.

this is what you want to introduce them to chewing on food

https://www.amazon.com/Munchkin-Fresh-Feeder-Colors-Count/dp/B000GK5XY2

I bought one of these https://www.amazon.com/Regalo-192-Inch-Super-Adjustable-Mounts/dp/B003VNKLIY/ref=sxin_9_osp60-b278d184_cov?ascsubtag=b278d184-e34b-446e-be98-e3d114e2274e&creativeASIN=B003VNKLIY&cv_ct_id=amzn1.osp.b278d184-e34b-446e-be98-e3d114e2274e&cv_ct_pg=search&cv_ct_wn=osp-search&keywords=baby+gates&linkCode=oas&pd_rd_i=B003VNKLIY&pd_rd_r=7bda3c1f-4d08-484c-abc2-2a5cf94b9c61&pd_rd_w=5ZoJL&pd_rd_wg=5oIB3&pf_rd_p=53eff971-6e12-4016-9864-b6dfd929b2b3&pf_rd_r=5RXD0KG48KK90804YK12&qid=1570464488&tag=mlbonsitepub-20

They wrap around the stairs for added protection and you can screw into the drywall instead to the railing.