Best products from r/northernireland

Hi there, was going to DM you, but since I'm including links that may be useful to others, I'm posting as a comment. Apologies if it's a bit rambly, I'm really short on time and actually bookmarked this from y'day, but I'd rather reply with a ramble than postpone, if you're suffering!

I had depression in my 20s and it was terrifying - I didn't want to wake up either (didn't want to die, but wanted to be in a coma for a while so as not to have to deal with the gaping emptiness). I can hand on heart say now it was the best thing that ever happened to me - I had to face a lot of demons and I always think of it as it being like I was a rickety house that I was good at patching up, but it wasn't stable and when it collapsed I had to rebuild it (i.e. myself) almost from scratch. My self esteem was basically very damaged, but not totally - so most people thought I was confident and outgoing; and I often felt like I was. (Nothing's ever black and white!) It's hard to fathom how different I feel now to then; believe me when I tell you you can't even begin to imagine how wonderful your life can be when you work through this. I worked my way to good mental health by studying lots of stuff including CBT, self development, philosophy, and life coaching books.

A year or two later I ended up on anti-depressents because my sleep was still horrendous and I was acutely stressed at work - but because I'd done the mental legwork (oxymoron?), I was able to get off the anti-depressents in 3 months. 10 mg 1 month, 5 next, 5 on alternate days the last month. It was scary to take them, I was so scared of telling friends - then when I told them, I discovered a few of them were on anti-depressents themselves. I believe it was important to take these to clean up the 'chemical spill' in my brain from years of bad mental health; I also believe they wouldn't have worked if I hadn't changed my psychology/outlook/philosophy/behaviours/environment.

One major thing to work on - I realise now rumination was a major, major part of my depression: thinking over things again and again without (being able to) take action - including beating myself up for failures. We all fail, often; it's the human experience, and we just need to be kinder to ourselves about it! Rumination is a major cause of depression - the good news is, it only takes a few minutes of distraction - once you realise you're doing it - to get your mind off that stressful path. Once you become aware of it and start choosing better ways to describe your situation (not full on positive ones when you feel terrible - the gap is too big - but slightly more positive, then slightly more positive again) you can turn things around, mentally speaking.

I ended up starting a life coaching course and becoming a coach in 2007. I don't treat depression but have worked with clients with depression, usually alongside them having therapy and/or medications. I'm currently packing to leave Finland and go back to NI for a few days; my schedule's a bit higgledy-piggledy but I would love to give you a free session or two via Skype over the next few days, if you're up for it. When I was in a very dark place in '07, strangers on the internet were a great help (a forum online, which I ended up going back on to help others; great karmic circle!) and would like to help you. Again - it wouldn't be therapy, it'd be coaching - support - for good mental and lifestyle habits and positive life changes that'll get you into a better place. You can see how it's helped others at http://soulambition.com/testimonials.

If you're not up for it, I'm currently formally studying again (there are a lot of woowoo coaches out there, but I really work hard at staying updated with scientifically-grounded research and exercises, and I've road tested it all). I've just finished my research project on positive psychology, mindfulness and music for mental wellbeing, and have a lot of stuff that could help you. Music that soothes or uplifts you is massively useful (particularly for avoiding rumination - and someone here's doing research on how using music FOR rumination - listening to songs that make you sad again and again - can impact depression. Don't do that! :) )

I really recommend the book Mind Over Mood (CBT workbook) - I recommend it to clients; you can get it on Amazon or in Waterstone's.

I also really recommend mindfulness meditation - there has been a lot of research done on its power to combat depression (I listed some apps/books here: http://dreamdolove.com/a-simple-guide-to-mindfulness/); I was back running a mindfulness course in NI this year and one of the participants said at the end of six workshops/two weeks that she realised she'd been depressed and her friends were saying she 'seemed like herself again'. Get one of those free apps and find YouTube videos, and make it a daily habit. It actually rewires the brain, with prolonged practice - no time to add sources here but I've added them in my online articles.

Also, if you're having bother falling asleep, find a crappy audiobook on YouTube! Cheesy chick-lit shite works for me; I'm not fighting to stay awake to hear what happens next - tho' sometimes I feel like I'm lowering my IQ while I sleep. ;)

A positive psychology exercise shown again and again to help with depression is the 'three things that went well and their causes' - or daily gratitude exercise. I'm currently posting mine online every day for December, to show how it works - read about it here: http://dreamdolove.com/a-month-of-gratitude-on-social-media-decgratitude/

Get Flux on your computer if you haven't already - http://justgetflux.com, and avoid going on your phone late at night. Blue light in screens interferes with your circadian rhythms, and sleep is crucial for you right now. (Poor sleep was another major cause of my depression - exacerbated by rumination, which makes you dream more heavily and wake up exhausted). If you wake in the middle of the night, take comfort in the fact that humans used to sleep in two phases, with an hour or two of wakefulness in the middle - this 8 hours uninterrupted sleep idea is relatively new and due to modern working habits. Try meditating, light reading, audiobooks - mostly distraction from worrying thoughts.

Finally, pay strong attention to your body language! The first person I worked with who had depression, we were making 2 steps forward, 1 step back kind of progress. When I asked her to start paying attention to her body language, and how it kept her experiencing feeling of depression (slumped posture, slow walking, moving like a debilitated person, glum face), and consciously changing it to confident/happy body language and expression - even if she felt stupid or pissed off doing it, she had a breakthrough. We've known for many years that your mood is shown by your body language, but it's a relatively recent idea that your body language actually changes your mood.

TL;DR Use mindfulness meditation, consider buying "Mind Over Mood" CBT workbook (or borrow from the library); list 3 things every day you're grateful for, and their causes - proved to help with depression; TRUST that you will get through this; change your language to 'slightly more positive' - not blanket positive that feels fake and makes you feel worse - and keep doing so; change your body language/facial expression to more positive; get good sleep hygiene in place; distract yourself when you find yourself ruminating; use music that makes you feel good!

...You can see why I'd rather just get talking to you for an hour than type any more! :) But here are some more links if you're wanting to read stuff rather than talk:

http://dreamdolove.com/lighten-up-20-things-to-let-go-of-for-a-happier-life/

http://dreamdolove.com/mind-language/

http://dreamdolove.com/the-gratitude-attitude/

If I can turn my life around, you can too - and 1 very easy daily gratitude thought you can have is being thankful that we live in an age where we can connect with strangers who want to help so easily! It was a HUGE part of my recovery and I will always be grateful! Let me know if you want to set up a Skype video chat. Big hugs. :)

Edited to clarify anti-depressents bit.

Edit/PS: I'm 2 hours ahead of you so going to sleep shortly, but will check in first thing!

I've been learning about a year and a half. On Monday I just came back from 5 weeks in China.

I'm actually currently writing software to help people learn Chinese but I have not yet released it. I started writing it in part due to how awful duolingo is for Chinese.

My recommendations are:

1. Read Fluent Forever by Gabriel Wyner it's a truly fantastic book that teaches you how humans fundamentally learn before turning towards language learning.
   
   
2. Use spaced repetition be that through anki/pleco/skritter it will help enormously
   
   
3. The Chinese grammar wiki is your friend. It is a better resource for grammar than any and all books I've bought.
   
   
4. Read graded Mandarin books, I personally love Mandarin Companion it's written by the authors of the grammar wiki. Reading books in Chinese is a fantastic way to reinforce the characters and make learning fun. Personally I would recommend Country of the Blind.
   
   
5. Use hellotalk or a similar app to practice speaking Chinese. Alternatively your local university might have a Confucius Institute. They offer cheap lessons (the quality varies) but my local one (I live in Manchester) runs Mandarin Corner, a mix of native Chinese students and those learning Mandarin.
   
   If you have any other questions, feel free to ask.

>The Republicans weren’t as heavily infiltrated by British intelligence, Unionist communities were far more compliant with the RUC, and the Republicans tended to use the border as a means of escaping the RUC in safe houses in the South. Maybe that’s what you meant by ‘effective’

The British Army's [assessment(]http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/northern_ireland/6276416.stm) of the IRA was' a professional, dedicated, highly skilled and resilient force' while their opinion on loyalist paramilitaries and other republican groups are described as "little more than a collection of gangsters". From the British Army's analysis of Operation Banner, the 'IRA developed efficient intelligence, quartermaster, finance and engineering branches.' The same document assessed the two main loyalist protagonists as 'heavily involved in racketeering, extortion and other forms of serious crime. The following sentence is also relevant; 'The loyalist movement rarely attacked the security forces. It did so on occasion in response to political activities that were unpopular with the protestant community'
A. R. Oppenheimer published a book last year IRA, The Bombs and the Bullets: A History of Deadly Ingenuity, His opinion was the IRA was 'most adept and experienced insurgency group the world has ever seen through their bombing expertise'. Here is a brief interview with him
So to attribute the effectiveness of the IRA to the border and unionist compliance is both anorexic and inaccurate. The border was a factor but only a factor.

Again the HMIC found that the HET pursued cases involving State actors with less vigour than non state actors. Investigators from the HET lost their jobs and had their homes raided over their conduct. Again I will cite the activities and role of Robin Jackson and I will add this report from the police ombudsman that found for a 'number of years police acted in such a way as to protect informants from being fully accountable to the law.' And again John Weir was found credible by the Gardai and the Barron inquiry
I don't think there is actual crime of collusion in British law. The use of the word is misleading. If you want to claim that it requires a 'smoking gun' to prove collusion I would say that this is an exercise akin to catching smoke in a bottle. Instead lets look at collusion as term to describe occasions where State forces both actively and passively co-operated with non state actors. Passive collusion is a simple as not doing their job, not following leads. not collecting evidence, losing evidence. Active collusion would mean taking a more active role, like providing intelligence and material.
I will cite another two instances where the conduct of state forces was questionable, those are the cases of Robert Hamill and that of Loughinisland.

So in recap, there are several documented instances of 'collusion' in the history of the conflict. Occam's razor can be applied in a single case, but when the same questionable conduct appears repeatedly, I don't think it's unfair to say that the belief that there was repeated collusion in many forms both active and passive is without foundation.

Aye, my girlfriend is from near Dublin so I've been trying to educate myself on Anglo-Irish history and read A History of Ireland in 250 Episodes on our recent holiday to Spain. But if it wasn't for that and past conversations with Irish Catholic friends from church I would probably have only very slightly better knowledge of Ireland and its history than anyone else in England. As far as I know most people here just don't learn about it in school, or anything else about the Empire that isn't some dazzling source of national pride.

But yeah I can clearly see why OP's list just looks like a load of expectations that you'd willingly give up important elements of your irishness, and bilingual road signs are apparently an egregious act shoving the Irish language in their faces. I mean, if they really don't like it, the Irish is in italics so they know what to ignore!

The Chimp Paradox: The Mind Management Programme to Help You Achieve Success, Confidence and Happiness https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/009193558X/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_-sqRCbJGENBWH

If your interested in the milkman, check this out, not out yet but getting good reviews. Set in Derry in the late 70s/early 80s. Roddy Doyle loved it:.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Music-Love-Drugs-Geraldine-Quigley/dp/0241354137/ref=sr_1_1?s=music&ie=UTF8&qid=1540054773&sr=8-1&keywords=Music+love+drugs+war

Baking cake is easy. Not trying to shit on you. Decorating cakes is where the money and talent is. I went through a phase of baking a few years ago. And i swear to god my swiss roll is godly.

Mary Berry has a bunch of recipes in one of those tiny book collections.. It basically consists of fuckin everything into a bowl, mixing it and baking with fantastic results.

Just out of a few long stints in hospital, best thing that kept me going was getting the remote for the TV (if yours is hard-wired to the wall and only has channel up/down and volume up/down).

Get the remote linked below, get some friends or family to get a bunch of series or films on a USB stick and fire it in the back of the TV. Also remote means you can access TV guide and plan what to watch later, instead of just clicking through each channel hoping to catch something!

[https://www.amazon.co.uk/UNIVERSAL-REMOTE-CONTROL-SAMSUNG-LCD/dp/B0182X7EMS?ref_=fsclp_pl_dp_1]

Hope this helps.

Every News outlet as a predetermined agenda and self censors on that basis; to believe in the shiny beacon of "freedom of the press" is deeply naive. "Freedom of Expression" in the press is kept under check in a narrowly defined agenda to suit their corporate interests and political agendas. I would highly recommend reading Nick Davis Flat Earth News. The Narrative being pushed now is that freedom of the press is under attack is a sham; that disappeared a long time ago.

Good for you, I too am planning a great weekend.

It will start early at 9:00 when I shall turn on my TV, stand up and salute - https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p065ffm0

I will keep standing up and saluting obviously until 14:00 and Football Focus starts. Well that's the plan, however I will be drinking Pimms all day to toast the Royal Couple so may have passed out by around 11:00.

This is coming today via Amazon for me to wear - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Smiffys-Union-Jack-Suit-Large/dp/B006NPM7XE

I'm using this book as a starting point.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Complete-Irish-Beginner-Intermediate-Course/dp/1444102354/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1473719599&sr=8-4&keywords=teach+yourself+irish

It's quite good at covering the basics, but it's very expensive on Amazon. I was lucky enough to find a copy in a bookshop in England on sale.

One thing I will say is that the Irish alphabet is quite tricky to get to grips with at first and the book skims through it quite quickly so I recommend using another source- there are plenty of websites and YouTube videos which will help with this.

The 2 best ones I'd struggle to name, one was a complete history of the UDA which had their emblem on the front & the other was called either godfathers or gangsters, was published by the Sunday world and was about drug empires north & south. 50 dead men walking is a good read but it's said to be exaggerated. Most of the ones I've read have been library books my dad has checked out & then passed on to me.

Edit; Google results...


I might actually buy the 2nd one again, it's more about down south but it's a cracker and I'm sure the aul fella would love a copy.


https://www.amazon.co.uk/UDA-Inside-Heart-Loyalist-Terror/dp/1844880206


http://www.hive.co.uk/Product/Paul-Williams/Gangland--The-Shocking-Expose-of-the-Criminal-Underworld/14701344?gclid=Cj0KEQjwvIO_BRDt27qG3YX0w4wBEiQAsGu3ecj7ddjlm8SeAgdZo6AXo4nccF_1NHKZZIXCPXgV3MYaAtfE8P8HAQ

> Seeing as there were only two sentences, you only have two places to pick from.

Yes, but both were so desperately confused.

>Any books you would recommend, as you're learned in the subject?

Yes. Doctors of the Church by Pope Benedict XVI (that's the Pope before the current one, formerly Cardinal Ratzinger.)

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Doctors-Church-Pope-Benedict/dp/161278576X


>Just take the L bud.

In English?

very well could have been, and here ya can get it free on an Audible trial on Amazon. cheers!

Read this:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/0192801562/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1377930814&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX110_SY165_QL70

Ballymena does not have the best reputation but you can head into Belfast easily enough and the glens of Antrim are beautiful.

A chicken fillet sandwich is not a chicken burger. To make the sandwich: you take a bread roll (demi-baguette) and add mayo, lettuce, some grated cheddar and a little finely sliced raw onion (last two are optional). Then you take a southern fried chicken fillet (something like this https://www.amazon.com/Tyson-Premium-Cooked-Breaded-Chicken/dp/B073XZQ8M2 I figure you'd get something like this in any frozen food section of a supermarket) and slice it into diagonal strips, then lay that into the roll. And that's it. Perfect.

Yep I'd go with Virgin as well. Good thing with Virgin is that you can get their TV service for only a few quid more on top of the broadband cost as well. It's not much better than FreeView but you do get a Tivo box out of it on most packages.
It's definitely by far the fastest broadband in Belfast. Upload speeds are very poor though, that's a major disadvantage. I think BT's upload speeds are better.

I'm on the 100mbps service

I would highly recommend forking out for your own router though, the stock one is rubbish. I have this one

thanks - think ill get a sim only plan for 1year and share with my iphone and when home add to a mi fi,


https://www.amazon.co.uk/Archer-MR600-Unlocked-Configuration-required/dp/B0741FFT6F?th=1
this was interesting me but wondering if I can play ps4 on a cheaper model!

I struggled to get a CRT tv for my retro gaming, in the end I just got a wee converter thing off Amazon, works perfectly although I'm not sure if it will work on a computer monitor.


https://www.amazon.co.uk/GANA-Composite-Converter-Adapter-Supporting/dp/B01MU6KHKB/ref=mp_s_a_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1550751802&sr=8-4&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=n64+av+cable&dpPl=1&dpID=51fWyZY1kkL&ref=plSrch

There are adapters you can use to hook it up to a modern TV, [something like this] (https://www.amazon.co.uk/GANA-Composite-Converter-Adapter-Supporting/dp/B01MU6KHKB/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1536934784&sr=8-3&keywords=n64+hdmi+adapter) would work.