If you are new to Sex Addicts Anonymous or to /r/sexAA, if you think you might be suffering from a sexually based addiction, or if you just want to know more about our group... then we suggest reading this post and we hope that you will find something useful here.

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We, of SEX ADDICTS ANONYMOUS, are more than one hundred men and women who have recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. To show other sex addicts precisely how we have recovered is the main purpose of this book. For them, we hope these pages will prove so convincing that no further authentication will be necessary. We think this account of our experiences will help everyone to better understand the sex addict. Many do not comprehend that the sex addict is a very sick person. And besides, we are sure that our way of living has its advantages for all.

Paraphrased from Alcoholics Anonymous, Foreword to First Edition, xiii

Read: Why the Big Book of A.A.?


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1. No sex addict, man or woman, can be excluded from our Society; our leaders might serve but never govern; each group is to be autonomous and there is to be no professional class of therapy. There are to be no fees or dues; our expenses are to be met by our own voluntary contributions. There is to be the least possible organization, even in our service centers. Our public relations are to be based upon attraction rather than promotion. All members ought to be anonymous at the level of press, radio, TV and films. And in no circumstances should we give endorsements, make alliances, or enter public controversies.
   
   
2. /r/sexAA is not a place to meet sexual acting out partners and it is not group therapy. We try not to use offensive language, or descriptions that are too explicit. We avoid explicit sexual language, names, places, and websites we associated with our acting-out behavior. Because of the nature of our addiction, we take great care when sharing and we strive NOT to share any inappropriate content. Our focus remains on the SOLUTION rather than the problem. If you have any questions please message the mods.
   
   
3. As SAA members the most important symbol of our willingness is a Desire Chip. A Desire Chip signifies our desire to stop our addictive sexual behaviors for good and for all. Is there anyone here who would like to begin their journey to sobriety today? Click here to claim a Desire Chip.
   
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   Tips For Getting Started
   

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4. To better understand sex addiction and to help you qualify yourself, we highly recommend you read What Is Sex Addiction And How Can I Tell If I Have It?
   
   
5. Call into the Saturday SAA Foundation Telemeeting. This is held every Saturday from 10:00 am - 11:15 am EST. 605-562-3140 access code 215701#. This meeting will give you a great introduction to our program and will introduce you to the tried-and-true 12 Step method of recovery.
   
   
6. Read Alcoholics Anonymous: The Big Book --- [(Free Online Version)]
   (http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/alcoholics-anonymous) It contains the original 12 Step program upon which our entire fellowship is based. We have found that is it simple to replace "selfish sex" when we come across the word "alcohol." Or "sex addict" for "alcoholic." There are a few places in the book where we cannot translate the directions word-for-word so that it applies to our sex addiction. Even so, we believe there exists an important reason for working our SAA program as directed by suggestions in the Big Book.
   
   "Of alcoholics, who came to AA, and really tried, 50% got sober at once and remained that way; 25% sobered up after some relapses, and among the remainder, those who stayed on with AA showed improvement."
   
   This indicates a success rate at around 75% during the first 20 years of AA's existence when the Big Book was the only 12 Step book. Read more on Why the Big Book of AA?
   
   
7. We highly recommend you find a qualified "sponsor" and begin working the 12 Steps as soon as possible. Working all 12 Steps with a qualified sponsor is the basis of our program and our society and it is where we believe the path to permanent recovery exists.
   
   
8. All of our meetings are 100% free of charge. If the meeting is attended by recovered sex addicts who have worked the 12 Steps this can be a great place to find a sponsor.
   telemeetings
   in-person meetings
   
   
9. Define your bottom line behaviors and share them with your sponsor. For help on Defining Abstinence.
   
   
10. Many members have found it helpful to add a devotional book to their daily spiritual routine:
    Answers in the Heart
    Touchstones: A Book Of Daily Meditations For Men
    Twenty Four Hours a Day
    
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    ...for the SAA newcomer who identifies as atheist or agnostic.
    

    
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    ...Despite the living example of my friend there remained in me the vestiges of my old prejudice. The word God still aroused a certain antipathy. When the thought was expressed that there might be a God personal to me this feeling was intensified. I didn’t like the idea. I could go for such conceptions as Creative Intelligence, Universal Mind or Spirit of Nature but I resisted the thought of a Czar of the Heavens, however loving His sway might be. I have since talked with scores of men who felt the same way. My friend suggested what then seemed a novel idea. He said, “Why don’t you choose your own conception of God?’’
    
    Do not let any prejudice you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they might mean to you. At the start, this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth, to effect our first conscious relation with God as we understood Him [or Her]. Afterward, we found ourselves accepting many things which had seemed entirely out of reach. That was growth. But if we wished to grow we had to begin somewhere. So at first we used our own conceptions of God, however limited they were.
    
    
    Alcoholics Anonymous, p12, 47
    
    continue reading...
    
    To our atheist and agnostic brothers and sisters, please do not let the spiritual nature of the program deter you from giving it an honest chance. Almost half of the original one hundred members who wrote Alcoholics Anonymous identified as atheist or agnostic. Many of us who have entered the program were not spiritual people and yet we have found a lasting sense of peace and serenity through working the 12 Steps. We are happy, joyous, and free. We are recovered.
    
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    Sex addiction is not a hopeless or unrecoverable condition. Many sex addicts achieve life-long recovery with the help of this program. SAA is grounded in the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions adapted from Alcoholics Anonymous. It is through the application of these fundamental tools that we, sex addicts, recover from this seemingly hopeless state of mind and body.

Great motivation, but motivation is temporary. Discipline lasts.

First thing is to realize that NOBODY conquers addiction on their own. You need allies, and you need tools. Nobody, no matter how strong, can beat addiction through will power alone.


r/pornfree is great, but the community is too big to provide quality support to every one of us. It's a first stop on your journey, sort of a lobby that will eventually lead you to a room where you actually find support. You need to find an accountability partner or group. This can be someone in real life, or someone you meet here. You can ask around, or even start your own subreddit. Taking the responsibility of starting a group will give you a ton of motivation.


Beyond that, here are some things I strongly recommend:


Come clean to someone in real life. What happens on the internet has a way of staying on the internet, it's part of the reason this addiction is so hard to get over. You need to feel this addiction in real life if you want real healing. And the whole point of overcoming porn addiction is to participate in real life more! Why not start now? 


Build a long-term recovery plan. Here is an awesome post detailing the elements of a successful plan. Here is my plan as an example.


Figure out your three circles. This is an exercise that helps you set boundaries for yourself. Here is a worksheet that pretty much explains it all, plus it includes a link to a Wikipedia article that goes into more detail.


Get a journal app that reminds you to make an entry every day. Journal your urges, your victories, your setbacks, etc. Your journal is a safe space to release your emotions and talk yourself through things. I also journal about gratitude and things like that, and it builds positivity.


Report your urges to an accountability partner while they are still happening. The best way to stop an urge is to talk about it in the present tense.


Mark your victories and milestones by finding a healthy way to celebrate. I made these colored popsicle sticks to mark each major milestone, and I carry them in my wallet like AA chips. It's a stupid popsicle stick, but it works for me. And if you are going into a high-trigger situation, like a trip to the beach, plan ahead of time to indulge in some healthy form of self-care as a reward for good behavior (like buying a new outfit, or taking some time to listen to your favorite music).


Speaking of self-care, make a plan to do nice things for yourself that do not threaten your recovery. What those things are will depend on what you enjoy, but put some thought into it, and plan ahead, or it will be too easy to reach for the unhealthy reward of porn.


Go outside more. I don't know why this is important, but it is. It's just good for your brain. And it doesn't have to be a week long camping trip in the Redwoods to do the trick. Walking out on the balcony of your apartment, breathing some fresh air, and looking at the half-dead flowers on your neighbor's porch is better than nothing.


Join a recovery program. Some are free, some cost money. Some cover multiple addictions, others are focused on porn. Here are just a few:


Smart Recovery


Recovered Man


Fortify


Fight the New Drug


Recovery Nation


Covenant Eyes


Facing the Shadow


Last of all, accept that addiction is never over. There is no "cure" for this. Lots of people labor under the delusion that if they can make it to 90 days, that's it, they're free. Many of those people will relapse on day 91. When you are addicted to porn, your brain rewires itself to make watching porn very easy, and avoiding porn very hard. You can break out of that loop, and if you do, the brain will begin to heal. By avoiding porn and all related behaviors, you can starve the neural pathways that led you to porn. But they will never completely die.


Good luck! PM me if you want to talk more.

For your first point. Are you actually interested in knowing? There are ways to increase your attractiveness, without becoming an entirely different person, and other than being:

• in shape
  
• respectful
  
• affectionate
  
  These aren’t BAD qualities, but I wouldn’t say they lead to attraction.
  
  Attraction is an emotion. It requires a bit of push/pull in your interactions with her.
  
  Examples of “pull”:
  
  
• Being affectionate
  
• cuddling
  
• kissing
  
• asking about her day
  
• doing things to make her life easier (making her coffee, helping her with something around the house)
  
  Examples of “push”:
  
  
• Tease her about silly things to make her laugh
  
• Do things that improve YOUR life and support your life’s mission
  
• Let her come to you when she’s busy
  
• Tell her what she can do to help make things better for your relationship.
  
• find something enjoyable to do on your own
  
  In the pull examples only she may feel overly secure in the relationship. This can lead to boredom and apathy. Mixing in a little push is good for both of you. Right now she’s all push and you’re all pull and the balance is off.
  
  You should both find balance with that, but if you start it will initiate better balance for her as well.
  
  Also check out this book (seriously!):
  https://www.amazon.com/Way-Superior-Man-Spiritual-Challenges-ebook/dp/B004A8ZWM4 (if you google it you can find a free pdf version).

ninja edit: Gender pronouns may be off. I'm female.

When you imagine having sex to masturbate, what are you "doing" in it, exactly? Try to focus on what is getting you to fulfillment rather than how.

The person you are making love to in your imagination might have a different voice or hair color each time... but emotionally, it's the same person each time isn't it? This person (whether spoken in the fantasy or not) is deeply committed to you, and you to him / her. The act in your imagination is full of love and enjoyment. You imagine sharing and learning with him, pleasing him, and he enjoys pleasing you. Do you often orgasm at the thought of your fantasy love crying out your name as she/he orgasms?

Conversely, how often are your fantasies based solely around your enjoyment? Or things where you are enjoying it but the other person isn't. Or where there is more than you two involved. It's one thing to imagine having sex at work in a quiet room where there's the potential to get caught. It's completely different than imagining a third actually watching. Or hurting or forcing the other and they aren't into it.

Read God Loves Sex. Sex is an act of holy communion between spouses. Desiring it with a spouse is not a sin. We are sexual creatures. Even babies masturbate in the womb.

1. Talked to your wife about what is going on. https://www.reddit.com/r/pornfree/comments/9gtc9h/just_confessed_9_points_for_telling_your/
   
2. Find a support group. You need something more personal than this sub. SAA meetings is a good place to start and they have phone in meetings. https://saa-recovery.org/meetings/
   
3. Consider trying therapy again. $350 is pretty steep. There are a lot out there for around $100 per hour. Still not cheap but is money well spent in the beginning especially. Find one who specializes in sex addiction.
   
4. Setup up covenant eyes on all of your devices and get an accountability partner who will get the reports.
   
5. Start making recovery priority number one in your life for the time being. Facing the Shadow is a great workbook as well as Recovery Nation. Haven't got through all of them but very pleased so far.
   
6. Start working a recovery plan. Start with the goal of going one week porn free. Setup a consequence and a reward. Identify threats you might encounter and action plans to mitigate risk. Good podcast on setting up your plan. https://recoveredman.com/107-back-2-basics-the-7-day-porn-free-plan/
   
7. Believe that you can do this. Thousands have already walked the path you are about to and have been successful. You can do this to.
   
   The path to recovery isn't necessarily complicated but is hard work.
   
   Best of luck to you.

We can do it!

But for real, I read your first post, but wasn't sure if you were still responding to comments there, so I thought I'd just post mine here.

Anyways, from reading your post, I thought I'd recommend reading Gabor Mate's, In The Realm of the Hungry Ghosts. I read it once about 2-3 years ago, was into it at the time, then kind of forgot everything in it. A few months back I picked it up and got myself reacquainted. I took notes when I needed to, and even wrote some choice quotes on flash cards for quick access - just ones I found inspiring, or thoughtful, or useful.

I'm kind of big on it right now. It's been helpful, for instance, I'm journaling, and writing out intentions and goals, all on the books' suggestion. Also, I at least feel smarter for having read it. That's something.

Okay, here's a portion of the book that has helped me out big time personally, and I'd highly suggest reading through it. It has honestly helped me. I'm not perfect, far from it, but it has helped. It's the concept/program of '4 steps plus one' from the book.

Here's a link to the '4 steps plus one' passage.


I know it might be a lot to mull through, and I know I'm well past sounding like a commercial, but I'm just trying to help.



If you have any questions/thoughts/whatever I'd be glad to talk or expand on something.


Here's a link to the book, too.

NTA!
I am old as dirt, and I have dump some pretty sucky lovers over my life time. But I have also had some amazing love making sessions that I can close my eyes right now and re-imagine the sensuality and feelings I experienced. They were few and far between, and not always with the "love" of my life, but it's those memories you make that give you that special smile that make your grankids wonder...LOL!

This addiction is just as potent as a meth addiction. It's that hard to quit. The best way to find recovery and sobriety is to attack it from several fronts. I am going to give you a hugo huge list of ways to go at this. My guy used them all. He has been sober as a judge for the last 4 years. He has been a sexahoilic for 54 years. If he can do it..YOU and every one else here can do it!

First try to see a CSAT counsler, a specialist in addiction therapy, for both the addict and the partner of the addict. Having someone explain the intricacies of the disease, how it effects the brain, and what it takes to beat it is they only way to understand what you both are faced with. https://www.sexhelp.com/am-i-a-sex-addict/

A recovery treatment center: http://www.lifestarnetwork.com/

Here is a good article about 12 step programs, it talks about AA and drug programs, but sexaholism is right there with them: http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2018/08/24/to-ben-affleck-and-other-addicts-heres-my-message-to-from-one-alcoholic-to-another.html

There are 12 step SAA meetings to control the habit https://saa-recovery.org/Meetings/UnitedStates/

On-line here is a recovery worksheet: https://www.smartrecovery.org/smart-recovery-toolbox/
On-line program for the SA: https://www.drglover.com/tpi-university/sons-of-ulysses.html

There are S-Anon meetings for the partners or family members of addicts. http://www.sanon.org/find-a-meeting/s-anon-meeting-locations-united-states/
OR SLAA https://slaafws.org/
Facebbok page: recovering spouses of sex addicts
Facebookpage: S-ANON

Also do a little reading, get the book Out of the Shadows, by Patrick Carnes. It will give you a real life view of what a sexaholic faces on the road to recovery.
Another good book: https://www.amazon.com/What-Can-Do-About-Me-ebook/dp/B00AVBERGG

If you want to block XXX sites from your computer Here is a simple way to do so: https://cleanbrowsing.org/for-adults
Or this is considered the best: K9 Web Protection: http://www1.k9webprotection.com
another way to blocking porn on your computer:
https://www.reddit.com/r/pornfree/comments/9ueez4/a_comprehensive_guide_to_blocking_porn_on_your/

Here is an app for your phone: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.androidapp.watchme

Here is a good resource for learning about stopping this in in your life. https://www.reddit.com/r/pornfree/comments/2mfxyi/concrete_tips_for_staying_away_from_porn/

Here is a reddit sub for addicts r/pornfree
Podcasts: https://recoveredman.com/category/pfr/
on-line Magazine for addicts: The Fix https://www.thefix.com/search/site/porn?page=11
Porn Reboot: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbqaPKeiNW6R6LECHwQkRug
Hypnosis for porn: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lmpwZf5Rono

Good Luck!
Keep coming back, it works when you work it, and your worth it..so work it!

Sorry for the wall of text. I'm reading "Habits of a Happy Brain" (another redditor recommended it, and it's a good primer on dopamine, endorphin, oxytocin, and cortisol).

The author outlines and then goes into detail on what these brain chemicals do, and how the brain has not evolved to deal with the amount of stimulation available today.

I'm rereading the book now, this time taking notes and doing the exercises. And it's hard but there's hope. Some of the other posters have written that we lose dopamine receptors because the brain becomes accustomed to the large amounts of brain chemicals released during super-stimulation (like porn, or even junk foods). They are absolutely right.

It takes time to let those receptors rebuild, and to build new neuronal pathways and let the old ones go fallow. Abstinence from PMO is probably the most effective way, while at the same time replacing the PMO habit with something else. The problem is you will be fighting your own brain! It has built a superhighway to satisfy what it sees as a survival strategy - a way to ensure the survival of your genes (even though masturbating to porn is the exact opposite of procreation, your lizard brain and limbic system don't know that).

The suck factor: When you are "building a streak" your brain is fighting what it sees as a survival threat. Can you say cortisol (sad pain)?

The good news, according to the author, is that if you stop the old habit cold turkey, and start to build a new one, you can gradually rebuild your dopamine receptors and new neuronal pathways. The key is repetition and time. And you will feel a difference... in 45 days. Another way to build a new "super highway" almost instantly is with an intense emotional experience (but we can't count on those happening on a regular basis).

The bad news is, if you don't repeat the new habit every day, and slip into the old one, you'll be right back at day one.

The good news is that your huge cortex can decide not to do the old bad habit, but then the limbic system and the lizard brain will keep pestering until you come up with an alternative. They won't take "No!" for an answer, so it's time to kick in the alternative "survival strategy" habit.

The bad news is that the new habit(s) will not provide what the brain regards as an adequate chemical reward.

So, what's good for survival today? I use different things at different times. I'm a pretty shallow guy, and I've found I enjoy knowing that my physique is good (it wasn't a few years ago, I was chubby and had bad posture). I made running a habit, and I made body-weight exercises a habit, and I made posture exercises a habit. And the first time I happened to look in the mirror and saw the beginning of some abs, the dopamine turned ON! I wanted to do more sittups, run farther, and stop eating ice cream, and get nice arms and sculpted abs. And I paired that with cutting way back on PMO (yeah, I'm still trying to quit) because there was no way I could do anything strenuous after a binge.

I still haven't hit 45 days of no PMO, but it doesn't have the allure it used to. And the other "good" habits have gotten stronger.

OK, I have to go get to work, but I hope this rambling helps! The book is pretty cheap online.

I encourage you both to read Cupid's Poisoned Arrow.

For you: you'll learn that he isn't entirely himself now. Don't take it personally, he may be madly in love with you, that's just his body craving for dopamine like any other addict. Don't try and please him to climax, it will just be counterproductive. Ejaculation has a cool-down phase of around 2 weeks which affects mood, reasoning etc.

For him: he'll learn that he isn't entirely himself now. There is a bright side to it: he can now discover a whole world about relationships and love.

You are an awesome human being by supporting him like this. Keep grinding but don't lose yourself.

Be happy 🙏

Great list, OP. Burns provides insights and guidance in both "Feeling Good" and "The Feeling Good Handbook". I'm a little over half-way through the Handbook. Doing the work, the exercises, is key.

If I may suggest, browse through "The Six Pillars" by Nathaniel Branden. The final work, in Appendix B, is a 31-week long series of sentence completions that are incredibly helpful in many aspects of life, including addictions.

DON'T STOP CUDDLING! Make it your mission to do some type of physical contact loving every day. With that out of the way...

I go to a support group that preaches a 90 day cooling off period of no sexual contact including him touching his own penis for any sort of good feeling. However, I don't subscribe to that. What I would recommend you check out is karezza. When I used porn it was a drive/a "need" that always led to ejaculation. With karezza the focus is on loving, nurturing and intimacy rather than orgasm.

My wife and I have been practicing this form of love making since April and I've only orgasmed twice in that time period (I did write "practicing"). We have intercourse much more frequently (once to twice a week vs. once every month or two), she enjoys the experience much more, I don't feel the let down from the endorphin rush, she does not experience pain from intercourse, it feels effortless and she describes it as feeling full or complete.

For more information I recommend checking out the mostly dead, but useful /r/karezza and the tedious, but informative book Cupid's Poisoned Arrow. A word of recommendation; the intercourse positions described in that book really don't work for my wife and I.

It can be beneficial, but only if he also does nofap and you two are working back into an intimate relationship.

Cool. It really changed how I approach sex for the better. If you like his writing at all you should also check out The Way of the Superior Man by the same author. It has some stuff about sex but it's mostly about how to live as a man in the modern world. I reread it every few months or so. It's phenomenal. Good luck to you!

I've read both of your posts and it's clear that you want the right thing for both yourself and your husband.

If I, or any of the other addicts here, had a magic phrase that you could tell your husband which would fix him, we'd all be cured. There's no easy, "this is what you should do" post.

For your husband: I suggest reading two books, neither of which are directly about porn addiction, but both of which were instrumental in my deciding to pursue recovery:

1. "The Heart of Addiction" by Lance Dodes. https://www.amazon.com/Heart-Addiction-Understanding-Alcoholism-Addictive/dp/0060958030/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1488222927&sr=8-1&keywords=the+heart+of+addiction
   
2. 'I Don't Want to Talk About IT: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression' by Terrence Real. https://www.amazon.com/Dont-Want-Talk-About-Overcoming/dp/0684835398/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1488222949&sr=8-1&keywords=i+don%27t+want+to+talk+about+it+terrence+real
   
   For you:
   
   If you aren't in therapy, get in therapy, the sooner the better. You cannot fix your husband; the sooner you figure that out and find a way to articulate what you need, better. You may think it's 100% his problem. That may be correct, but you've been damaged by it. You can't fix him; you may be able to help him when he's had enough, but your number one job is to make sure you remain an intact and functioning person.

You may also be dealing with procrastination as well. I'd definitely recommend checking out The Now Habit. It's a pretty short book to help with it.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Now-Habit-Overcoming-Procrastination/dp/1585425524

So when I read that you wanted to fix this, the first thought was to recommend this book to you about betrayal trauma and the authors story. I think you will get al ot out of it. My wife read it and it really helped us. My heart goes out to you and I hope your husband can find the help he needs or wants. Good luck.

https://www.amazon.com/What-Can-Do-About-Me-ebook/dp/B00AVBERGG

Quit Facebook. Quit Instagram. Sure as fuck works.

I've been porn-free since mid-October last year except for one relapse day. You know what triggered that 70-day-streak-breaking relapse? Someone posted a picture of themselves in a bikini on Facebook.

I'm on my second longest streak now. I know now that facebook and instagram can lead to relapses and can lead to dopamine fixes that harm my recovery processes. Even after quitting facebook, you still have to face media or pictures everywhere on earth that may have nsfw or triggering content. The solution? Avert your eyes. Whenever you feel you're doing something for a dopamine rush, be mindful of that and be honest to yourself that that's why you're doing it. Once you're mindful, you'll automatically stop looking. It'll take some practice, but you'll get there.

Another thing that I read on a quit-facebook forum is that once you actively filter out the shit and noise on your facebook feed, it becomes really empty and really boring and you'll quit on your own because there's no constant novelty and click-bait. Maybe that'll help you abstain or even quit, should you choose to. Also, Read this book. It's an amazing read about internet addiction and how its affecting our cognition.

You don't desire yourself when you masturbate. It's virtually universal that when masturbating you imagine pleasing an imaginary partner who is committed to you in some way. Many times masturbation is filled with lust. Most of the time it's a desire for passionate, sexual, loving intimacy that drives the release. When porn's involved though it's practically guaranteed to not be the intimacy-driven type.

Christianity is not one of the religions that say masturbation is wrong. Many sects say it's wrong but not as a collective. Try reading God Loves Sex.

I'm in the same boat, trying to quit porn and alcohol at the same time. I find Annie Grace's book 'This naked mind' super helpful with the alcohol side:

https://www.amazon.com/This-Naked-Mind-Discover-Happiness/dp/0525537236

I have had the same problem where I don't last long. I have started with longer amounts of foreplay. If I am going it and feel like i'm going to cum I will slow down or go back to a bit of foreplay. I read a great book called slow sex, which talks a lot about how people are having fast food sex as I call it, When we were teenagers we had to get in and get it done, for fear that we would get caught. No that we are older most people still have sex like that. Try and slow things down. I will list the book below you can get it on amazon.

And tell your hubby good job on the 7 months that's incredible!

https://www.amazon.com/Slow-Sex-Craft-Female-Orgasm/dp/0446567183

by Nicole Daedone

Gary Wilson and Marnia Robinson are husband and wife.

For the record, I think OP's account of reuniting.info is very misguided and unreasonably harsh. I think the printed book version of her thoughts (Cupid's Poisoned Arrow) is very interesting, and my journey with seeking to remove porn from my life has evolved into a very in-depth exploration of Karezza and healing-based sex that has innocently included reading the book. I don't in any way feel as though Karezza is a cult, nor do I feel as though I've been coerced in any way. It's just a different way of looking at things—why someone would find things like this so inflammatory is more interesting to observe than it is scathing to Marnia's and Gary's reputation in my opinion.

This guys blog has helped me a ton! Arguably as much as /r/NoFap and /r/pornfree. Other great reads are The Demise of Guys ebook and I'm currently reading The Now Habit. I'm only like 1/8th of the way through TNH and I can tell you that it will for sure change the way you look at doing work and maintaining habits. Bold & Determined blog is good because it's just a no bullshit "grab your fuckin nuts and be it" kind of blog. Also the guy in that video Greg Plitt unfortunately died 3 days ago so RIP

Why wait?

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/cr/0985063378/ref=mw_dp_cr