Best products from r/selfhelp

We found 135 comments on r/selfhelp discussing the most recommended products. We ran sentiment analysis on each of these comments to determine how redditors feel about different products. We found 125 products and ranked them based on the amount of positive reactions they received. Here are the top 20.

Top comments mentioning products on r/selfhelp:

u/Darumana · 5 pointsr/selfhelp

I hope I am not too late.

You can post this to /r/suicidewatch.

Here is my half-baked attempt at providing you with some answers.

First of all let's see, what is the problem? Money and women. This sounds rather stereotypical but it became a stereotype because a lot of people had this kind of problems. So if you are bad at money and at women, join the club, everybody sucks at this.

Now, there are a few strategies of coping with this. I can tell you what worked for me and perhaps that will help you too.

I guess if there is only one thing that I would change in your attitude that would improve anything is learning the fact that "there is more where that came from". This is really important in girl problems and in money problems.

When you are speaking with a girl, I noticed that early on, men tend to start being very submissive and immature in a way. They start to offer her all the decision power because they are afraid not to lose her. This is a somehow normal response but it affects the relationship negatively. She sees you as lacking power and confidence and she shall grow cold. So here lies the strange balance between good and bad: you have to be powerful but also warm and magnanimous. You can only do this by experimenting without fearing the results of your actions. Even if the worst comes to happen, and she breaks up with you .... you'll always get a better option. There are 3.5 billion ladies on the planet. The statistics are skewed in your favor.

Now for the money issue. Again, there is more where that came from. The money, are a relatively recent invention. Our society is built upon them but we survived for 3 million years without them. The thing you need to learn is that your survival isn't directly related to money. You can always get food, shelter and a lot of other stuff for free. You won't live the good life, but you won't die. So why the anxiety then?

Question: It seems to me you are talking out of your ass. How do I put into practice this in order to get a girlfriend?

Answer: Talk to people. Male and female. Make the following your goals:
Talk to 1 girl each day for one month.
Meet a few friends each 3 days.
Make a new friend each two weeks.
Post your romantic encounters in /r/seduction.
This activities will add up after some time and you will have enough social skill to attract a female. You will understand what your female friend is thinking. Don't feel too bad if it doesn't work out.

Question: The above doesn't give a lot of practical advice on getting money. I want more of that. How do I get it?

Answer: To give you money people need to care about you. People only care about you when you care about them. This is why you need to do the following:
Start solving hard problems.
Start helping people.
Problems aren't only school problems. They refer to anything: start learning a new difficult subject (for example start learning physics or start playing an instrument or start writing a novel). Take up a really difficult project that is just above the verge of what you think you are able to do. Helping people is something more difficult and personal. You can work for charity, help your family members around the house and other similar.

Question: I don't understand. I have problems and you are asking me to work for charity, donate money? How can giving money solve anything?

Answer: If you don't give, how can you receive? Helping others is instilling a sense of purpose in a very strange way. You become superior to others by helping them in a dispassionate way.

Question: I feel like I am going to cry, you are making fun of me!
Answer: Not entirely untrue. But this is not the problem. The problem is that you are taking yourself too serious. We all are, and I have similar problems. The true mark of a person of genius is to laugh at himself. Cultivate your sense of humor in any manner you can.

Question: What does it matter then if I choose to kill myself?

Answer: There is this really good anecdote about Thales of Miletus (search wiki). He was preaching that there is no difference between life and death. His friends asked him: If there is no difference, why don't you kill yourself. At this, he instantly answered: I don't kill myself because there is no difference.

Question: Even if I would like to change and do the things you want me to do, human nature is faulty. It is certain that I would have relapses. How do I snap out of it?

Answer: There are five habits that you should instill that will keep bad emotions away. Either of this habits has its own benefits and drawbacks:

  1. Mental contemplation. This has various forms, but two are the best well know: prayer and meditation. At the beginning stage they are quite different, but later they begin to be the same. You will become aware that there are things greater than you are. This will take some of the pressure off of your shoulders.
  2. Physical exercise. Build up your physical strength and you will build up your mental strength.
  3. Meet with friends. If you don't have friends, find them.
  4. Work. This wil give you a sense of purpose. Help somebody else. This is what I am doing here. We are all together on this journey. Even though we can't be nice with everyone, we need to at least do our best in this direction.
  5. Entertainment. Read a book. Play a game. Watch a movie. Sometimes our brain needs a break. If not, it will take a break anyway and it will not be a pretty one. Without regular breaks, procrastination will occur.

    Question: Your post seems somewhat interesting but more in an intriguing kind of way. I would like to know more.

    Answer: There are a few good books on these subjects. I don't expect you to read all of them, but consider them at least.

    For general mental change over I recommend this:
    http://www.amazon.com/Learned-Optimism-Change-Your-Mind/dp/1400078393/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1324795853&sr=8-1

    http://www.amazon.com/Generous-Man-Helping-Others-Sexiest/dp/1560257288

    For girl issues I recommend the following book. This will open up a whole bag of worms and you will have an entire literature to pick from. This is not going to be easy. Remember though, difficult is good for you.
    http://www.amazon.com/GAME-UNDERCOVER-SOCIETY-PICK-UP-ARTISTS/dp/1841957518/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1324795664&sr=8-1 (lately it is popular to dish this book for a number of reasons. Read it and decide for yourself. There is a lot of truth in it)

    Regarding money problem, the first thing is to learn to solve problems. The following is the best in my opinion
    http://www.amazon.com/How-Solve-Mathematical-Princeton-Science/dp/069111966X
    The second thing about money is to understand why our culture seems wrong and you don't seem to have enough. This will make you a bit more comfortable when you don't have money.
    http://www.amazon.com/Story-B-Daniel-Quinn/dp/0553379011/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1324795746&sr=8-3 (this one has a prequel called Ishmael. which people usually like better. This one is more to my liking.)

    For mental contemplation there are two recommendations:
    http://www.urbandharma.org/udharma4/mpe.html . This one is for meditation purposes.
    http://www.amazon.com/Way-Pilgrim-Continues-His/dp/0060630175 . This one is if you want to learn how to pray. I am an orthodox Christian and this is what worked for me. I cannot recommend things I didn't try.

    For exercising I found bodyweight exercising to be one of the best for me. I will recommend only from this area. Of course, you can take up weights or whatever.
    http://www.amazon.com/Convict-Conditioning-Weakness-Survival-Strength/dp/0938045768/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1324795875&sr=8-1 (this is what I use and I am rather happy with it. A lot of people recommend this one instead: http://www.rosstraining.com/nevergymless.html )

    Regarding friends, the following is the best bang for your bucks:
    http://www.amazon.com/How-Win-Friends-Influence-People/dp/1439167346/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1324796461&sr=8-1 (again, lots of criticism, but lots of praise too)

    The rest of the points are addressed in the above books. I haven't given any book on financial advices. Once you know how to solve problems and use google and try to help people money will start coming, don't worry.

    I hope this post helps you, even though it is a bit long and cynical.

    Merry Christmas!
u/screenwblues · 2 pointsr/selfhelp

If you have a doctor (like a GP) ask them for a recommendation/refferal, if you have friends/family who have had success with therapy, ask about their therapist or how they found them.

There are places online that are like Yelp for doctors which can provide user based feedback on how effective a therapist is/was.

There are also places online that offer online therapists. I can't vouch for how good they are but a lot seem to boast real therapists at a discounted cost.

There are hospitals and NGO's that are set up to treat people who have certain issues (like addiction, depression, anxiety). Call and ask them for recommendations.

Look around for support groups that help people with your issues. Go to them or ask the people who run them who they recommend for individual counseling.

Maybe there's a sub on Reddit for your city/town that you could ask.

Look up kinds of therapy. There is psychiatry, psychology and using a combination of both. Psychology has different kinds of therapy too CBT (which has been show to be effective for depression), EFT, Gestalt - the list goes on. Read about their differing approaches to get an idea of what is best for you.

(If CBT is of any interest, you can read this [book] (https://www.amazon.com/Mind-Over-Mood-Second-Changing/dp/1462520421/). It's a workbook and the emphasis is on the work. There are lots of exercises that provide real help right away but it takes time so be patient.)

Anyway, once you have names, you can meet or more therapists for a consultation and see how you feel about them and what they offer. Your gut will tell you a lot. If it isn't a fit, no big deal, keep on looking.

For context:

My path was to ask my GP for help and be told I should eat better, sleep better, not drink or smoke weed and get exercise. Fair enough. All of those things fuck with your mood and disposition.

I struggled and couldn't get that all to work but I felt better after a while so I figured I was good.

Then I crashed again and asked for help again. I got bumped up to a counselor that the GP referred me to. He told me to eat better, sleep better, stop drinking and smoking weed, do exercise and gave me some books to read.

I did some of that for a while and then had a HUGE crash.

I figured I was depressed. Took a bunch of bullshit quizes online to self-diagnose. Then I looked up therapists in the area I was in. There was a mood disorder clinic that specialized in depression, etc. that was for people in crisis. It was all psychiatrists.

And, elsewhere, I found a counselor that was reviewed really well online from some random site (I wasn't very fastidious in my research owing to the personal crisis).

The mood people needed a referral so I contacted my GP. I didn't ask for help this time. I told him. I was in crisis, I had tried other strategies. I needed to escalate my care.

He gave me a referral.

I saw that psychiatrist and, lucky for me, he was amazing at his job and figured out I had bipolar 2 instead of depression (it's often misdiagnosed).

Meanwhile, I was on a waiting list for a therapist and she finally became available. I worked with her and she was amazing.

I had seen three psychotherapists before but she was the one who made the biggest difference.

I'm good now. With a combo of meds, therapy, meditation and (you guessed it), eating/sleeping/exercising right without drugs or alcohol, I'm having a pretty great life.

That's just me and my path. I only mention it to show that it can be a struggle to get the help you need but it is so worthwhile.

I wish I'd put my foot down 15 years ago.

It can be a weird process. It can take time. It can be awkward.

But there is nothing more important than fighting through all that to get yourself a better life and better way of being.

Even when I worked with therapists who didn't get to the heart of my problems, I learned SO much about who I am and how to cope with things.

When you think about it, you only learn how to live, fight, love, overcome, etc. from the few people in your family and maybe a friend or two if you have some really close ones.

It makes so much sense to me that I reached out for other sources and support and thoughts on how to live life.

There's no problem or any shame in any of this. It's the most important thing to value in your life.

When you're talking about dealing with your issues, you're talking about understanding yourself and learning how to be the best version of you. If you put work in on this stuff, it changes the filter that you look at life through. And that means it changes your life completely and changes it for anyone who is in your life too. I'm a better partner now. A better friend. I'm better at work.

Feel free to reply anytime to let me know how you do with all of this. I'm more than happy to offer any thoughts down the road.

u/letstalkfailure · 2 pointsr/selfhelp

I'm a little late to this thread but still thought I'd throw in my opinions. First i think its always interesting how we tend to internalize the comments/criticisms of strangers or friends. We take what they say to heart and it eats us up inside. but then we brush off the encouraging comments from significant others/family/CLOSE friends. We tend to cover their comments by saying "well he's my husband. he's suppose to say that." If you take a step back and really look at that situation its a little weird right? We take to heart the comments from people who dont matter to us but brush off the comments from the people who really do matter in our lives. So first and foremost i would encourage you to really try to recognize that. Value the opinions and comments from that small inner circle you have (significant others/family/CLOSE FRIENDS). You shouldnt brush them off by saying "well they're suppose to say that". lean on those comments and cherish them.

secondly, it seems like you are looking for someone to just say the right things or give you the magic formula on how to live a happier life. Well there isnt some magic formula. no secrets and nothing an individual can SAY that will change the course of your life. it all come back to you and the actions you take. or i should say actions/inaction. you have to make the steps to change the course of your life. whether those steps are going to therapy, walking over to those parents at the library and just saying "hello", or embracing the comments from your husband, these all depend on you. you have to take these initial steps. no one will take them for you.

thirdly, you asked for some book recommendations. I would suggest watching this TED talk by Brene Brown: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o

then read her book called Daring Greatly: http://www.amazon.com/Daring-Greatly-Courage-Vulnerable-Transforms/dp/1592407331/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1397148456&sr=8-1&keywords=daring+greatly

finally, i would say that it probably feels like you are all alone in this struggle. You might wonder why you feel like this and why YOU feel worthless and like a failure. Trust me in that you are not alone. millions of people struggle through the very same thing. at the same note, millions of people are able to lift themselves up and change the course of their lives. so this is not an impossible task. it just takes effort. i want to emphasize "EFFORT". it just takes you making the first steps. you have to make the effort to talk to other parents and say hello. you have to make the effort to embrace the comments from your loved ones. you have to make the effort of signing up for therapy. you have to make the effort to lift yourself up out of this hole and push forward.

good luck and wish you the best!

u/haloshade · 2 pointsr/selfhelp

I did this a while ago, and I highly recommend it to anyone who feels the slightest bit socially awkward: make a goal for yourself to make small conversations with a new person for 30 days.

It could be talking about the cold winds of winter while to the stranger next to you at Starbucks. It could be asking somebody at a bar what they're drinking. And it could be asking the somebody on the floor of Best Buy to help you find something, and while you're making your way down the aisle ask them how their day is going.

I say small conversations and not small talk because small talk is usually "scripted" per se, like the classic "How are you doing?" "Fine, how about yourself?" that we're all conditioned to say. At Starbucks, after you mention the weather, ask them if they have any big plans for the day. At the bar ask them what they recommend. At Best Buy ask them if they're watching any good TV shows.

It's all about finding the connecting points, not about making an impression (unless it's a job interview). If there are no connecting points then so be it, you two probably wouldn't be good friends anyways. If the Best Buy attendant and you are both fans of Black Mirror then you know instantly you have something to talk about.

I used to train Parkour, and in Parkour we would do these things called a "dry run" (not sure if anybody else called it this). They were runs you did near the obstacle, or on something else similar to it, but they were safer. Although the movements were the same, the dry run usually was in a safe location, to help us mentally prepare for our full run.

Going out there and challenging yourself to speak to 30 new people in 30 days is much like the dry runs. Don't put any expectations on yourself, instead relish in the comfort that you're probably never ever going to see these people again, and because of that you are free to train safely.

Edit: Two books I recommend you read: How to Win Friends and Influence People, the most recommended self-help book because people of all walks of life are still trying to figure out other people. The book goes into detail on how to be an empathetic listener and why asking questions is the most important thing you can do. The second book I recommend is Quiet, by Susan Cain, which is pretty much How to Win Friend's mortal enemy if it had one. If you're like me and identify as an introvert, you've probably felt self conscious of your tendency to not talk as much as your peers, in Quiet Cain pretty much turns this taboo upside down, as she delves into the psychology of introversion vs extroversion. These two books changed the ways I interacted with others, and gave me some self acceptance and confidence in my temperament.

u/raisondecalcul · 2 pointsr/selfhelp

Our society is incredibly unhealthy, far more unhealthy than it is possible for most people to understand. You are beginning to realize this and "wake up", and it can be scary. You have been programmed with all these unhealthy patterns that make living a sheer misery and a terror, but you are expected to act as if nothing is wrong. It's very tricky to climb out of a hole like this.

Where are your bright spots? Do you have any good friends? Any communities you belong to? What are your dreams and passions in life?

The best thing I can recommend is Chogyam Trungpa's three-part series The Profound Treasury of the Ocean of Dharma. It is a complete guide to all of the aspects of Buddhist practices to end suffering and create a happy life. If you read and master any one of these three books, your problems will end. Very practical:

  • Hinayana: The Path of Individual Liberation is the basics of Buddhism, meditation, clearing the mind and letting go of things which harm us

  • Mahayana: The Bodhisattva Path of Wisdom and Compassion is the "second turning of the wheel" of Buddhism (like Christianity adds on to Judaism), and it focuses on developing compassion and joy, purity and brilliance through empathy and devotion to helping the world.

  • Vajrayana: The Tantric Path of Indestructible Wakefulness is full of advanced techniques for near the end of the Buddhist path of self-purification. These techniques are incredibly powerful but can be dangerous if practiced before first balancing the mind with the first two "turnings of the wheel".

    These books are not about religion, but are technical guides for how to handle your life and existential issues of suffering and love, motivation and joy, depression and alienation, etc. I would recommend getting the first two books and working diligently out of them. You will find your problems quickly resolving themselves if you do something like this.

    Another perspective that helps me relax is the Church of the SubGenius. Their parody religion is actually a very high quality actual religion. Their main books, The Book of the SubGenius and Revelation X are hilarious and full of techniques for getting through the day and living with the "normals" or "pinkboys".

    There is also a fun community on Telegram you can join. See the sidebar in my subreddit, /r/sorceryofthespectacle, for a link to join the Telegram channel. Say hi to me on Telegram and I will introduce you to the wizards there.

    P.S. It sounds to me more like you have found your spark, than lost it ;-)
u/pickingafightwithyou · 1 pointr/selfhelp

Got it. I'd suggest dropping the word control & using mastery instead. I'm not arguing semantics but words have great power. You want mastery over your sexual desires (yes?). There's two aspects of this: your "outer-world" and your "inner-world". The outer world is the physical / external; you want to put that sexual energy into something else. Sexual energy is creative energy, so something creative is the best fit. Another powerful way to practice mastery in the external is to take up martial arts. Your inner world is your feelings / beliefs / insecurities about this sexual energy. This is a great book for mastery of our inner world. And one last thing: I wouldn't try to stop masturbating completely as the release is very healthy, particularly for your age.

u/sorokine · 7 pointsr/selfhelp

Hey,

Congratulations on your decision to get help! You can do it. In you post history, I can see that you struggle with depression.

First, where are you located? Are you in Europe, in the US, somewhere else? In most places, you can find therapists. Are you still in school or studying? Many schools and universities offer free mental health councelling. Check those out! Depending on your situation, you might be able to qualify for government assistance. I am not in the US, but I believe you can check HealthCare.gov to find out if you qualify and take your next steps from there. If you don't qualify, there is a very cool blog post by a psychologist on how to get mental health care on a budget: http://slatestarcodex.com/2018/04/25/mental-health-on-a-budget/

Let me quote from that article:

"This section is on ways to do therapy if you cannot afford a traditional therapist. There may also be other options specific to your area, like training clinics attached to colleges that charge “sliding scale” fees (ie they will charge you less if you can’t afford full price).

1. Bibliotherapy: If you’re doing a specific therapy for a specific problem (as opposed to just trying to vent or organize your thoughts), studies generally find that doing therapy out of a textbook works just as well as doing it with a real therapist. I usually recommend David Burns’ therapy books: Feeling Good for depression and When Panic Attacks for anxiety. If you have anger, emotional breakdowns, or other borderline-adjacent symptoms, consider a DBT skills workbook. For OCD, Brain Lock.

2. Free support groups: Alcoholics Anonymous is neither as great as the proponents say nor as terrible as the detractors say; for a balanced look, see here. There are countless different spinoffs for non-religious people or people with various demographic characteristics or different drugs. But there are also groups for gambling addiction, sex addiction, and food addiction (including eating disorders). There’s a list of anxiety and depression support groups here. Groups for conditions like social anxiety can be especially helpful since going to the group is itself a form of exposure therapy.

3. Therapy startups: These are companies like BetterHelp and TalkSpace which offer remote therapy for something like $50/week. I was previously more bullish on these; more recently, it looks like they have stopped offering free videochat with a subscription. That means you may be limited to texting your therapist about very specific things you are doing that day, which isn’t really therapy. And some awful thinkpiece sites that always hate everything are also skeptical. I am interested in hearing experiences from anyone who has used these sites. Until then, consider them use-at-your-own-risk." (end quote)

There are also sections on prescription medicine and on supplements in that article. Check it out!

If you are in a particularly bad spot or just need somebody to talk, there are lots of phone lines and services where you can call in for free. One example: https://www.crisistextline.org/depression/ (US-based).

There are also subreddits like /r/depression where you can get help from people who actually know what they are talking about.

​

Good luck and hang in there!

​

​

u/dcutlergm · 3 pointsr/selfhelp

Read the Miracle Morning (quick & easy read). The author has pulled the best morning routines in 6 steps:

Silence - Meditate
Affirmation
Visualize
Exercise
Read
Scribe - Journal

Apart from changing your life, the book introduces you to a 70k strong community that only inspires and encourages. Every single person has been in your position.

I read the book over a year ago which ultimately lead me to complete 4 triathlons so far and help me focus my mind through meditation.

https://www.amazon.com/Miracle-Morning-Not-So-Obvious-Guaranteed-Transform/dp/0979019710

u/blyng · 1 pointr/selfhelp

I recommend that you do the [EFT personal peace procedure] (http://www.emofree.com/eft-tutorial/tapping-roots/peace.html). This is about listing all the things that bother you in your life, and clearing your emotional hangups about them. Your post has several limiting beliefs that you hold woven into it. Doing this will clear those limiting beliefs. What does that mean? Watch [this youtube video about the palace of possibilities] (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xih8ZE0GfOM). This is the first of a series, but it describes how the rules we have in our subconscious determine and limit our life.

Use one of these techniques to release / remove the emotions around one issue a day.

[free eft tutorial basic recipe] (http://www.emofree.com/eft-tutorial/tapping-basics/how-to-do-eft.html)

[some youtube videos of EFT tutorial] (http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=eft+tutorial)

[free pstec download] (http://www.pstec.org)

[free the work of byron katie] (http://www.thework.com)

[katie's book about the work] (http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/loving-what-is-byron-katie/1100320988?ean=9781400045372)

[partly free matrix reimprinting] (http://www.matrixreimprinting.com)

[youtube videos about matrix reimprinting] (http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=matrix+reimprinting)

[not free sedona method] (http://sedona.com)

[cheap amazon book about sedona method] (http://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Free-Easier-Than-Think/dp/0971933405)

You'll be a lot happier and content and self-assured person when you are done.

u/[deleted] · 2 pointsr/selfhelp

Naw, you're not insane, as long as you don't hurt anyone or yourself. Don't think in absolutes (insane or sane). I suggest taking a psychology and philosophy course at the local community college. These will help you a great deal in understanding how your mind works and connecting you with more resources. There is a great deal of knowledge from thinkers past.

http://www.amazon.com/Divided-Self-Existential-Madness-Psychology/dp/0140135375
http://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-Therapy-Revised-Updated/dp/0380810336

u/Arise_again · 5 pointsr/selfhelp

The first thing I would suggest is to see a counselor, someone who will listen and give you feedback.


Secondly, I would definitely recommend watching this podcast of author Sam Harris on the Joe Rogan show, in which he talks about minds and dysfunctional thoughts.


I also always recommend a book called "The Power of Now" by Eckart Tolle. He has many videos on youtube as well. In his book he speaks about how people tend to identify with their minds, that is to believe that you are one and the same as your mind instead of knowing that your mind is simply a tool, a machine for you to use in daily life.


Hope this helps!

u/WanderingJones · 7 pointsr/selfhelp

The big key is you need something repeatable that you can practice. For that I like cognitive behavioral therapy (I would read Feeling Good) and meditation (I like Meditation in Plain English, a free book). CBT is a good way to stop believing things that aren't true and meditation is a good way to help ignore the things that are.

u/fweng · 3 pointsr/selfhelp

Agree with Sharkus a million percent. CBT is making huge leaps for me, and I strongly recommend Feeling Good. I'm reading it now, a couple of chapters in, and I wish I knew about it years ago. If you get it, please let me know how you get along.

u/Axana · 2 pointsr/selfhelp

Feeling Good is a popular self-help book that was written by one of the founders of CBT and should give you a good idea of how CBT is useful. It discusses procrastination and lack of motivation in great detail and how to manage these issues. It's a book I highly recommend to anyone suffering from these issues as well as depression or anxiety. You can probably find one cent used copies on Amazon if you search for an older edition.


u/obizzy27 · 1 pointr/selfhelp

[mind over mood] (https://www.amazon.com/Mind-Over-Mood-Second-Changing/dp/1462520421/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1524532567&sr=1-1&keywords=mind+over+mood+second+edition) is a book which I recommend heavily. It uses the latest research and CBT to help you control your mood, thought and actions. It has exercises which you can do to help you become aware of your moods- awareness is the first step in getting better.

u/NightAudio · 2 pointsr/selfhelp

there a book by gary john bishop it's call un fuck yourself get into your life and out of your head this book is about seven affirmations and it might help you become the best version of your self

here is a link if you are interested in buying it <a target="_blank" href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B071F7C5NQ/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=B071F7C5NQ&linkCode=as2&tag=nightaudio-20&linkId=ddba10a05a6a41e0e450bf5bb6c96030"><img border="" src="//ws-na.amazon-adsystem.com/widgets/q?_encoding=UTF8&MarketPlace=US&ASIN=B071F7C5NQ&ServiceVersion=20070822&ID=AsinImage&WS=1&Format=_SL250_&tag=nightaudio-20" ></a><img src="//ir-na.amazon-adsystem.com/e/ir?t=nightaudio-20&l=am2&o=1&a=B071F7C5NQ" width="1" height="1" border="" alt="" style="border:none !important; margin:0px !important;" />

u/throwaway-person · 6 pointsr/selfhelp

Look for a dialectical behavioral therapist or group, especially one who is qualified to help you learn distress tolerance techniques. There are also self help workbooks for this type of therapy on Amazon. This one is basically the same content my past DBT group worked on.

u/mrakestraw777 · 3 pointsr/selfhelp

Perhaps Cognitive Behavioral Therapy will help. Sometimes negative thoughts can be helped by creating a habit of thinking positively.

u/cow_soul_train · 5 pointsr/selfhelp

Assuming your male...No More Mr. Nice Guy. I struggle with this as well, I'm to be more assertive and less of a people pleaser.

u/bquintb · 3 pointsr/selfhelp

read, understand, believe and put into practice the ideas in this book

u/gadiandi3 · 1 pointr/selfhelp

Feeling Good by David Burns is a great book about treating depression and self-esteem with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. It might be a little difficult for him to read if he has a lot of shame about his moods though so you might also look for another book about CBT that is less about "treating depression" and more about "improving your life".