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Reddit mentions of CalExotics Dr. Laura Berman Dilator Set, 4 Locking Sizes Plus Sleeve

Sentiment score: 9
Reddit mentions: 14

We found 14 Reddit mentions of CalExotics Dr. Laura Berman Dilator Set, 4 Locking Sizes Plus Sleeve. Here are the top ones.

CalExotics Dr. Laura Berman Dilator Set, 4 Locking Sizes Plus Sleeve
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    Features:
  • Multi-speed vibrating dilator to give pleasure while you train
  • Includes three interlocked dilating sleeves for custom girth selection and a soft universal pleasure sleeve
  • Sturdy high-quality chain for added sensuality
  • Designed by women for women and endorsed by Dr. Laura Berman
  • Discreetly shipped
Specs:
ColorPink
Height0.02 Inches
Is adult product1
Length4.5 Inches
Number of items1
Release dateDecember 2007
Weight0.4875 Pounds
Width1.5 Inches

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Found 14 comments on CalExotics Dr. Laura Berman Dilator Set, 4 Locking Sizes Plus Sleeve:

u/[deleted] · 57 pointsr/sex

Not really pertaining to sexual acts, but I have a new Gyno and not only am I getting an IUD later this week, but I was finally able to graduate to my second level of thickness on my dilators!! I've had vaginismus for the past year, and this is the most progress I've had!!

u/AndItAllGoesAway · 19 pointsr/sex

Yes it can! :) It's actually common in therapy to treat vaginismus this way! You might want to get a set like this or this though, which are because these ones are specially made for comfortable vaginal dilation! <3

Edit: If you're not on a budget, getting silicone ones like the options below are a good idea because they're softer and more comfortable.

These are nice but a bit on the expensive side, can be bought individually though.

A really nice looking set actually!

u/LittlePeanut92 · 8 pointsr/sex

Hello, I am a girl who is working through vaginismus and also had to get my hymen opened surgically. I am in a LTR and am now able to enjoy penetration now. This is a little long, but I thought I would share from info with you.

  1. First of all, get a diagnosis. She may need to go to a gynecologist specifically. I went to three doctors who said everything looked fine and that I just needed to "relax". But I was unable to wear tampons, have a pap test, have sex/fingering etc. The gynecologist was the only one who recognised the opening in my hymen was too small and that I needed surgery. (There are also many other reasons for sexual pain like vulvodynia, endo, UTIS/infections, nerves, etc. so having a well educated doctor will be very important in finding the right treatment for her.)
  2. It may take a team of experts to help her. A gynecologist, pelvic floor physiotherapist and a sex therapist are likely what she will need.
  3. The physiotherapist will likely recommended breathing/relaxation exercises, external stretches, and using graduated dilators to help with stretching (see link) https://www.amazon.ca/California-Exotic-Novelties-SE-9711-14-3/dp/B00121B0H8 She may need to use the dilators for several months, maybe even a year before she is ready to have sex depending how consistently she is using them. If she is unable to insert a dilator that is close to the size of your penis, she probably won't be ready to have sex with you yet.
  4. As a partner you will need to be extremely patient. It is curable but it takes time and hard work. It is difficult for your girlfriend both emotionally and physically try to be understanding and supportive.
  5. You can still have a good sex life without PIV but you will need to built trust that she is in control of what is happening to her body. How can she enjoy when she is expecting pain? Try focusing clitoral stimulation if that's enjoyable for her. If she hasn't had an orgasm before I'd highly recommended using that bullet on her clit instead. If she wants to try your finger, have her insert it and control the movement until she is comfortable.
  6. Check out r/vaginismus or vaginismus.com for more info. Also I would suggest you and your GF watch this youtube video to get some accurate info about the Hymen. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qFojO8WkpA There are rare cases where the opening in the hymen is too small, or the hymen can be too thick/non elastic that is can require surgery. Here are some pics of different types of hymens. It might be good for your girlfriend to part her lips and have a good look with a hand mirror. http://www.mhhe.com/socscience/sex/common/ibank/ibank/0010.jpg

    If you have any questions about vaginismus or hymen problems I'd be happy to answer for you. I know there isn't a whole lot of info out there about hymens and I remember being in your GFs shoes and being so afraid. Things will get better if she is willing to get help.

    Good Luck!
u/ReginaLaqueus · 6 pointsr/TwoXChromosomes

Have you looked into vaginal dilator sets? This is a great one and might be able to help you take some time by yourself to relax and see if it might help.

The pain is probably also augmented by the fact that it's hurt for so long, that you're afraid of the pain, which makes you tense up, which makes it hurt more. Using dilators on your own may make it easier for you to go at your own pace.

Also for the burning pain, have you tried multiple forms of lube? Some allergic or sensitivity reactions cause this.

u/listenheed · 3 pointsr/vaginismus

I agree with getting something to stimulate you, and I myself have a combination vibrator and dilator that helps me out a lot. I don't use the sleeve, since it's not smooth and thus doesn't go in as easily for me at this stage, but sometimes while dilating, I turn on the vibrating function if it hurts a bit, and the sensation helps me loosen up. Might not be a good choice for your current situation, but maybe in the future as you progress, it'd come in handy.

Also, if you're in the States, here's the link for the American Association of Sexual Educators, Counselors and Therapists’ referral page. It might help you find someone for counseling.

Edit: Seems the AASECT site also has a few options for other countries as well, not just the US, but has a bit more of a wider variety for specific states.

u/mongmongah · 3 pointsr/vaginismus

OMG brilliant! I didn't even think about that, I'll ask my pt if she has a size in between! Thanks~ I use the Dr. Laura Berman Basic Dilator set So I'm so close! I don't want to lose my momentum now!

u/kate-monster · 3 pointsr/vaginismus

This is the set I used. It’s $19 on Amazon. Warning that the jump between 3 and 4 is pretty large so you might want to buy a vibrator that bridges the gap. Berman Center Dilator Set https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00121B0H8/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_ghRjDbN196JTT

u/myhoohahurts · 2 pointsr/vaginismus

I've heard the Pure Romance ones are highly recommended, they are silicone. I tried to buy them today but there was something weird going on with there site, it kept bringing me back to the shopping page when I was trying to pay up. Embarrassing enough to have to buy them without having it pop up every five minutes to show your shopping cart and ask you to pay..grr.

I ended up buying the Dr. Berman ones as they start off small which is what you need to get started. It's a vibrator and has a rubber knobbly cover that you can put on top if you want. There are three four different sizes and it was $32. So way cheaper then the vaginismus.com ones (which I had before and they didn't work) and I figure for something I'll be using to train VG to cop the heck on it hopefully will do. Am going to do the q-tip trick that rendzina mentioned in her post. Then move on to the dilators.

Edit: Damn just saw the link to Dr. B's dilators on Amazon and they're just $17!

u/westie312 · 2 pointsr/vaginismus

I'm based out of the US so I can't really offer up too much help finding a PT across the pond but I can help you out with some exercises and stretches you could try.

You can try to treat it at home but you will most definitely have the best progress and personalized help if you go see a pelvic floor PT so I highly recommend checking that out!

---

Some things you could try to increase your progress on your own are deep breathing and pelvic floor relaxation exercises that could help you, but I would still recommend going to see a PT on your own and get personalized help.

These are some exercises that my PT gave me helped me a lot and may help you while you figure out your next steps.

Don't feel like you have to do all of these exercises every single set you do throughout the day. Make a 5 min routine out of some breathing, stretching, and pelvic floor relaxation and do a set 2-3 times per day.

---

Yoga poses that focus on stretching out the pelvic floor-

happy baby
supine pigeon (do for both legs)
supine butterfly
goddess pose

Try to do some of of these 2-3 times a day, for one minute each.

---

Deep breathing: Lie with hips and knees bent. Allow body's muscles to relax. Place hands on belly. Inhale slowly and deeply for 3-4 seconds, so hands move up. Then take 3-4 seconds to exhale.

You can also imagine bushing your breath out of body through the pelvic floor, relaxing it each exhale. Can be done sitting or standing if you need to.

Repeat 20 times.

---

Pelvic floor exercises- (You really want to focus on getting your pelvic muscles to really relax. It almost feels like relaxing to go to the bathroom so is a little weird at first. That is definitely the exercise you want more than regular kegels, which are supposed to strengthen your muscles. You are currently trying to do the opposite.) -

Pelvic floor muscle relaxation: Lie on back with feet flat, knees bent.

Start each repetition with a 3 second contraction of the pelvic muscles, then let go of the contraction, then try a VERY GENTLE forced relaxation WHILE BREATHING.

Maintain the relaxation for 5 seconds, then just rest for 10 seconds.

Elevator exercises: "Your vagina is a muscular tube, with the sections arranged like rings one on top of another. Imagine each section as a different “floor” of a building, and that you are moving an elevator up and down by tensing each section, getting progressively higher. Start by slowly bringing the elevator up to the second floor and holding for a second, then move up to the third, and so on, until you get to the fifth floor. Hold. Now bring the elevator down, floor-by-floor, “resting” at each floor, to the first floor (the starting point). Then make a trip to the basement, where your pelvic floor is completely relaxed."
(From this site )

  • I wouldn't do any kegels to strengthen, only ones that let you relax and increase control

    Try to also be aware periodically throughout the day if your pelvic floor muscles are tight and clenched or relaxed in a natural position. If they are contracted and tight try and relax your muscles every time you notice. Deep breathing or relaxation kegels might be helpful here.

    ---

    You may also want to try a set of vaginal dilators. There's a wide variety online so I would check out the sets in vaginismus.com as well as Amazon and other places online to see which works best for you, your exercise routine, and your wallet.

    I would recommend waiting to start using these until after you have seen and discussed it with a PT but that's not always an option for everyone.

    You'll want to be laying on your back somewhere quite you can relax, like a bedroom or bathroom in the tub. Clean the dilators before and after each use with warm soapy water. Always use lots of water based lube (NOT Vaseline or petroleum) when inserting m, and you may want to do this after a set of stretching and breathing exercises. Start with the smallest size dilator and gently insert it at the same angle you would a tampon- angled back toward your tailbone not straight up into your body. When it's fully inserted try to do some kegels and pelvic floor relaxation exercises, as well as deep slow breathing. You may also want to angle the dilators and hold firm but gentle pressure in "problem areas. You can also make slow, "sweeping", circular motions from the side to side and back and front walls of your vagina. You may be fine with just holding it still as well. When totally comfortable with and able to easily insert and remove the size you are currently using try the next size up.

    A little discomfort is ok but pain means stop! DON'T try to force a dilator in if it won't go in- the pain certainly won't help and you could actually injure yourself. Go slow- sometimes pausing and deep breathing are all you need to make things a little easier. Don't try to skip a size while dilating, they are graduated sizes for a good reason! And if you are able to get a larger size in but the pain is too great/uncomfortable it just means that your body isn't quite ready for that yet and that you should still use the smaller size down and that's totally fine! Everyone progresses at different speeds.

    Use your dilators about 3-4 times a week for 10-15 minutes a dilation session total (not 10-15 minutes per dilator if you are using multiple sizes a session).

    ---

    The most important thing is going to be making your exercise routine something that you keep up with every day. My tip for you is to set up daily reminders/alarms on your phone to remind you to do your PT. I personally had one reminder right when I woke up, one for when I got home, and one for before bed. It really helped me stay on track.

    That and the app PT Timer- it's an excellent resource for keeping track of exercise times and how you're keeping up with your daily routine. You can enter in your personal PT exercise routine and the timings you need to do. It can be a little tricky to figure out at first but totally worth it!

    ---

    Please know that you are not alone and that we are all rooting for you!
u/bears2013 · 2 pointsr/TheGirlSurvivalGuide

I'm just curious--have you ever had successful penetrative sex or inserted anything in your vagina before? If even the idea of inserting something causes you a lot of anxiety and pain (if you haven't tried tampons I'm assuming you haven't tried a penis), then I think at least having a dilator set at home would be a good way to gently practice insertion in a relaxing and comfortable environment.



This is the one I have. Basically get as comfy and relaxed as you can, and with the smallest dilator using lube, gently get used to the sensation of something being in that area. Slowly at your own pace, get comfortable with the idea of inserting something inside. Be relaxed and calm, and do a little bit at a time. Stretch a bit to the bottom, stretch a bit to the sides, whatever you want.







I used to have random shooting pains down there--like I'd be walking or sitting and all of the sudden it's like someone was stabbing my vagina with hot knives. Tampons hurt and I always felt them. My periods were nauseating and I'd even pass out from pain on occasion. Basically everything that had to do with my vagina was associated with pain and discomfort, so penetrative sex just would not physically happen without excruciating pain. My problem was mostly mental with the physical component of being perma-clenched up, so getting comfortable with my body/insertion really helped. I know what I experienced isn't what you did, but hopefully getting comfortable with your body down there can help you ease some of the pain and anxiety.












I had access to a women's PT through the recommendation of my gyno. I told her the issues I was having attempting sex, an she referred me to one in the hospital. I'm sure if you belong to a decently sized hospital, they will have services like that for you, or can at least recommend a place for you to get the help you need.

u/typhlosionn · 2 pointsr/sex

look for a pelvic floor physical therapist in your area. i cannot stress this enough. while self treatment sounds fine and dandy, having a trained professional teach me about my condition and walk me through everything helped me so much. it changed my life forever. make sure to pay attention to the reviews as well, because i’ve had my fair share of shitty PT’s.

the vagina kinda has 3 layers of muscle, kind of like tiers. while fingers can stimulate the vagina and massage the muscles, it is hard to emulate how a penis will feel inside the vagina, especially with the added pain and hypersensitivity that comes with having vaginismus. one thing you can do with your fingers is massage the sides of those muscles by stroking them slowly in one direction (gently, and repeatedly. so like, if you go up along the muscle slowly, instead of massaging back and forth you just go up again). this video is very helpful in explaining it. i commend you both to watch the entire video together!!!! https://youtu.be/KPt9PUvw5x0 this could also be a very intimate and emotional bonding moment for the two of you to learn how to do these massages on her :)

in researching you may find that kegels are a very highly recommended exercise for treating vaginismus. while this is true, it can also be detrimental to her treatment. vaginismus means that the vaginal muscles are TOO TIGHT. and kegels are for strengthening the vaginal muscles. really strong vag muscles = really tight vag muscles. in my experience, my vaginal muscles were clenched/spasming 80% of the time, so while my vag muscles were strong from constantly straining, they werent trained to unclench and relax. just keep in mind that if she does a kegel for 5 seconds at a time, make sure she really relaxes her muscles for at least 10 seconds after. so: 5 secs kegel, 10+ secs relaxing, repeat repeat repeat!

also, i know she can’t keep toys at her house, so i am assuming almost all sexual activity happens at your place. can you keep a toy at yours? maybe in a lockbox or something too just for added privacy? with vaginismus, it is fairly impossible to “work your way up” from fingers to a penis. it just is not the same in the slightest.

the Berman dilator is a great set for working towards PIV! it has many sizes, is fairly cheap, and it vibrates! vibration helps immensely with decreasing nerve sensitivity. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00121B0H8/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_Ke60CbQ7V9Z3S

i am hoping and praying for you guys! vaginismus really SUCKS, but it is curable :) it seems like you really love your girlfriend, keep up the emotional support! that is the most important thing in this situation. good luck guys!!

u/daniellecinnamon · 1 pointr/vaginismus

this is what i used - http://www.amazon.com/Berman-Center-SE-9711-14-3-Dilator/dp/B00121B0H8
the plus is that you also have an awesome vibrator for other general purposes :)
They're easy to use, and i definitely recommend.
Don't know much about sleeping with one inside, sounds to me very uncomfortable.

u/Misplacedfromorb · 1 pointr/vaginismus

Thanks! I am looking to learn from experiences on where vibrators help and your comments on dilators are helpful as well. I was recommended 'Dr. Laura Berman Intimate Basics- Dilator Set' if that helps.