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Reddit mentions of The Confidence Gap: A Guide to Overcoming Fear and Self-Doubt
Sentiment score: 4
Reddit mentions: 13
We found 13 Reddit mentions of The Confidence Gap: A Guide to Overcoming Fear and Self-Doubt. Here are the top ones.
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Used Book in Good Condition
Specs:
Color | Multicolor |
Height | 8.98 Inches |
Length | 6 Inches |
Number of items | 1 |
Release date | September 2011 |
Weight | 0.85 Pounds |
Width | 0.76 Inches |
ACT might be a good fit as it incorporates a lot of the techniques of mindfulness. It tends to be more pragmatic than CBT and focuses on workable actions and values.
As the name implies, acceptance is also central. You're not looking to change your thoughts or even necessarily understand them as you learn to accept and defuse from them. This distance tends to help with the feedback loop of amplifying negative thoughts and reduce the brain fog you describe.
It's also easy to practice ACT alone. Anything by Steven Hayes or Russ Harris would be a good start as they both offer lots of exercises you can do on your own. I've found Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life and The Confidence Gap useful.
For me it was realizing that everyone in the job world is just as full of shit as I am. Realizing it's a game and I'm getting very good at it.
Also, this book.
This is the one on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/Confidence-Gap-Guide-Overcoming-Self-Doubt/dp/1590309235
^not an affiliate link
If you're really interested in improving your confidence, read The Confidence Gap by Russ Harris.
The confidence gap is feeling like you can't do things unless you are confident. The book describes how the actions of confidence come first and the feelings of confidence come later, but it's not really fake it till you make it. It's more driven by acceptance of negative thoughts and feelings in order to neutralize them. Fake it til you make it can accentuate imposter syndrome.
Anyways if you're interested in improving your confidence in a real way (no positive affirmations, delusions of grandeur shit, that doesn't work), I highly recommend this book. It isn't that long, but it could make a big difference in your life.
I've been doing ACT for about a year now after 2-3 years of CBT. I've also done group therapy, and for ACT the required book that helped me start to understand/get a little better was called 'The Confidence Gap' by Russ Harris. Here's an amazon link, I definitely recommend getting it:
http://www.amazon.com/The-Confidence-Gap-Overcoming-Self-Doubt/dp/1590309235/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1409960005&sr=8-1&keywords=the+confidence+gap
I have found Acceptance and Commitment Therapy incredibly helpful (for many things, but especially this). Most health insurance covers counseling, which is appropriate for anyone who feels their life isn't working for them and wants to make changes. If you'd prefer the self-help route, here are some books: basic intro, anxiety-specific, and self-confidence specific.
Holy shit bro you have more balls than me! I'm too scared to go to bars and pick up chick. Give yourself some props, at least you can say "I tried" Also read this book, it helped me and can help you.
Don't worry too much about this, you are still able to defend yourself if need be. Usually our behavior adapts to the environment.
If you want be more like that monk, I recommend to read the book The confidence gap. It makes the point that true courage or confidence is based on adherence to your own values and describes mindfulness based techniques to practice that.
He also explains that even the most courageous people experience fear. They just choose not to react to it:)
Sorry for asking, but are you experiencing lots of stress? are you the highly neurotic type?
Before determining that you need willpower to control and suppress these actions I think it might help to find out why you are doing these things first. Find the root of cause, address them, and acknowledge them.
Book wise I would recommend [The Confidence Gap]{https://www.amazon.com/Confidence-Gap-Guide-Overcoming-Self-Doubt/dp/1590309235/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1521352956&sr=8-1&keywords=the+confidence+gap} as this really brings me to a new perspective and changed how I do things in some ways.
Edit: spelling
First, I want you to read The Confidence Gap. Some of the things will seem stupid, silly, or cheesy, but please, do it.
Next, I want you to read Models: Attract Women Through Honest. It's a poor title. It's not misogynistic bullshit and it's not a magical "here's how to get hot women."
Then I want you to go out and get shot down on purpose. Seriously. Go out to a bar and the first 10 women you see, use what you learned from reading those two books. Get rejected 10 times.
Congrats! You've now learned that getting rejected doesn't mean anything. Nothing is wrong with you, nothing is wrong with the women, they're just not interested. The end.
The Confidence Gap: A Guide to Overcoming Fear and Self-Doubt https://www.amazon.com/dp/1590309235/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_n13KAbNAFB57T
This book really helped me using the same principle: https://www.amazon.com/Confidence-Gap-Guide-Overcoming-Self-Doubt/dp/1590309235
You can have what you want - A little unconventional, but it has some great advice regarding the most common mental traps and pitfalls, and how to deal with them.
The confidence gap - Definitely worth a read if you have confidence issues.
Lastly, while it's not a book or youtube video, if you can get your paws on the "Deep inner game" seminar from Double Your Dating I highly recommend watching it. It's old school, and some of the info is a bit dated, but overall I think it's very good.