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Reddit reviews: The best self esteem books

We found 608 Reddit comments discussing the best self esteem books. We ran sentiment analysis on each of these comments to determine how redditors feel about different products. We found 178 products and ranked them based on the amount of positive reactions they received. Here are the top 20.

Top Reddit comments about Self-Esteem:

u/dendrobatidae · 2 pointsr/TwoXChromosomes

I'm stealing another redditor's format to make it easier for you to find the useful information in this ramble...haha


DRESS:If you are a small enough size, try looking in the kids'/juniors' section - no joke. My friend only just breaks 5', and she found a really pretty white dress that was a fraction of the price of adult dresses.

Dress shopping is hard :( It's worth finding out about your body type to help narrow your options. When your arms are relaxed at your waist, are your elbows below your natural waist (the smallest circumference of your waist)? If you said yes, then congratulations, you're short-waisted like me and cheap dress shopping will be a bitch because everything cheap is catered to long-waisted women (elbows are above natural waist). If you are short-waisted, for instance, babydoll styles look silly, but empress waistlines/dresses that ruche at the side or wrap around are flattering. If you're long-waisted, I think you can rock a wider variety of styles.

It may be a worth a spin by Ross, Filene's Basement, or the like - often, you can find decent, cheap stuff there.

MAKEUP:For makeup, many people get makeovers from the counters at malls (Bobbi Brown does the most natural-looking jobs). Sometimes these are free, and sometimes they do this with the understanding that you will buy one or two items afterwards. This can cost $30 and up in products, though, so do your research and see who will do it for free. I think the Body Shop does free makeup, although it'll be their mineral-y powerstuffs which don't augment as much as other kinds of makeup would. I, personally, prefer Bobbi Brown because you exit looking like a slightly prettier normal person, and you get some high quality products you can use for the next year (if you wear makeup as infrequently as I do, haha. Actually, I may still have products I bought for prom makeup four years ago).

By the way, Bobbi Brown has some books on beauty that I still refer to - here and here, although this might be most helpful for you if you decide to do your own makeup. The InStyle Secrets of Style books are also like DIY manuals for fashion/style/life in general. You could also check out the blog Already Pretty, although I don't remember if there are many prom-appropriate articles. They do have a lot of confidence-boosting articles, though, and confidence is important for any social event! They also have some stuff on finding the right clothes for your body type, which could help with dress shopping.

EVENT: The event varies from place to place. Mine was a dance in a large hotel hall that came with a seated dinner buffet and dessert buffet. It was chaperoned by teachers. The deejay did a bit of challenging girls vs. boys to dance, but nothing with plastic inflatable goods. He played mostly top 40 songs, and then some songs we had requested (e.g. "Don't Stop Believing" was our prom song). There wasn't a lot of grinding at our school because the clothes were generally too restrictive and the girls were wearing heels, haha. I doubt you'll feel pressured into doing that; some people are totally happy just sitting and talking and eating for the whole time, if those are options for you.



Above all, have a great time! Everyone's nervous, but it is so much fun to see everyone all dolled up - especially the dudes forced into tuxes. Bring a camera and you'll always have something to do :) Best of luck!

u/BetterLifeDude · 1 pointr/NoFap

> They know nothing of me, and I wish to keep things that way.

Well, that means you have a lot of privacy, use it!

Watch this you should take the time, then try to power-pose around 20 min a day, isn't much but it will change your thoughts (of course I don't mean 20 min straight, more like 2 min 10 times a day)

> I don't exactly do much [...]

read this it's great and free, and easily readable in a weekend. It's basically about how to actually do something, could also help with your "binge eating".

> I was clearly no good at it, so I gave up trying.

This is exactly the reason why you aren't good at anything.

Nobody is good at something at the first try, you have to work hard in order to get good at something. Pick something you like (and, in best case something that would also make a good job, but more importantly something you like), and then get really good at it, persistence is the key here.

> there are [...] things I can do comfortably on my own - [...] going to the local shop.

Well, if you buy something you surely have to speak (or, at the very least, somehow interact) with another human being. Smile. Try to smile to as much people as you can, and when there are no people seeing you, smile all the time (best case scenario: you smile all the time regardless of people seeing you)

> I always gave up on everything when the first try failed.

As I said earlier, persistence is the key. If you have some time, try to read the law of success by Napoleon Hill, available here as ebook, and here as audiobook (around 24 hours)

To your last paragraph, again, persistence is the key. If you are willing to spend some money, buy the book Mini Habits it basically teaches persistence through a rather unusual approach.

In case you can't click on the links, I'll list them here again:

Power-Pose : http://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_shapes_who_you_are

getting to do things : http://www.google.de/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=breaking%20out%20of%20homeostasis%20pdf&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CDAQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.smashwords.com%2Fbooks%2Fdownload%2F362266%2F1%2Flatest%2F0%2F0%2Fbreaking-out-of-homeostasis-the-not-so-magic-pill-of-self-development.pdf&ei=Y2pzVO0Gx7w99ceBmAg&usg=AFQjCNF6-sqqzjEqmxF4whWsf7fWJotA9A&bvm=bv.80185997,d.ZWU&cad=rja

Law of success ebook : https://archive.org/details/Law_Of_Success_in_16_Lessons

Law of Success audiobook : http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLUeRmc_VnIdefMXiYZAi-Bhztsm20fhrT

Mini Habits : http://www.amazon.com/Mini-Habits-Smaller-Bigger-Results-ebook/dp/B00HGKNBDK

u/invertedjenny · 2 pointsr/MakeupAddiction

Just to repeat bc its true - you are a beautiful person :) Your makeup should be totally about you! Experiment! Play around! Go with colors you like and products you love! For example, I've found that I adore wearing long lasting liquid matte lipsticks in crazy bold colors. But I hate wearing foundation. So I wear lipstick and no foundation (maybe I'll wear a little pressed powder though for my oily T-zone).

I am 22 and have taught myself a lot about makeup in the last year. My advice to you is to focus on what you love about your face (what are your favorite features?) and learn what you can do to draw more attention to those parts. Ex.) I like my mouth! So I wear bright reds to draw attention to my mouth.

I am also a big research person. Youtube is filled with so many tutorials. I really liked these books. I rented them both from my local library :)

So be open! Experiment! Shop from new companies when they have sales or when you have coupons for drugstore makeup! I have my favorite foundation from a sale at BH Cosmetics. My favorite red lipstick is from a sale at NYX. My favorite mascara is from a coupon I had for covergirl lash blast mascara. Find what you like and what you don't to build up your personal tastes. My favorite finishing powder is $3 and from Wal-Mart.

But most of all, it is you that makes you beautiful. Makeup is like the cherry on a gorgeous sundae. You are a beautiful sundae. Add as many cherries or sprinkles as you want. A little or a lot, whatever you find you are comfortable with :)

u/HelloKidney · 1 pointr/atheism

As cheesy as it is, this book helps me to recognize something positive each day.

Everybody is different, but for me, when I was in the thick of grief, I found it helpful adjust my perspective and try to see my life from afar like somebody less fortunate see it. I would remind myself that I have a safe place to sleep, enough to eat, indoor plumbing and electricity. That when many people lay down and dream, these are the things they dream about because they aren't lucky enough to have them. I found appreciating the simplest of comforts in my everyday life allowed me to start finding joy in things again.

I hope at least one of these responses helps you find peace. I truly feel for you. Best of luck, and sincere, long-distance hugs from a random internet stranger.

u/mollymarie23 · 1 pointr/TheGirlSurvivalGuide

I feel you! I spent several years in my late twenties researching these things because I didn't value them/learn them earlier. Before I lived in dude's cargo camo shorts and t-shirts. It was a simpler time :)

I don't do makeup and clothes and hair and nails all the time, but I have gradually upped my normal level of presentation. Most of this was for work, but also to blend at social functions where I was way out of my element and felt terrible about sticking out. There is value in being ABLE to blend, even if you don't choose to do it all the time.

General tips: Take baby steps. Work on one thing at a time. Best place to start is making sure you are clean and neat. Clean, clip, and if needed file your nails. Put some clear polish on them. When you get more confident with your application, find a french tip nail pen (or white nail polish if you're more coordinated than I am :p) and do that. From there maybe you consider growing them out. If you jump into something like fake nails, that level of transition is going to feel uncomfortable and probably unsustainable.

Start cheap. You could spend a lot of money on different clothes, makeup, hair products, and nail stuff. Drug store brands, Elf makeup, nyx, and gently used clothes from thrift shops can let you experiment without breaking the bank. When you have a better idea of what you like, you can upgrade to spendier things of a high quality (if needed, I still love ELF!). This way you don't drop 20 bucks on a lipstick that you eventually realize is a color you love but not a shade that looks good on you. Or a sweater that after some reflection you realize you never wear because it rides up on your waist or doesn't look as nice as you hoped.

Try it out at home. Eventually you have to leave the house with it, but try things before you go out with them. Trying putting on makeup or doing something to my hair on a lazy weekend day helped me get used to the feeling, the look, and not feel hideously embarrassed if I did something that didn't look great. There will be those times.

I read the following books:

Drop Dead Brilliant (personal branding in the workplace, covers clothes, posture, voice, all sorts of stuff you wouldn't think about) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00104ZFXM/

The Lucky Shopping Manual (out of date, but a visual guide to putting together a cohesive wardrobe) https://www.amazon.com/Lucky-Shopping-Manual-Building-Improving/dp/B0073U347G/

Bobbi Brown Makeup Manual https://www.amazon.com/dp/B001FA0NZ6/

and a bunch of others but those were more work related. Can include if you're interested.

For youtube makeup, I have watched lots of do's/don't videos, and 'no makeup' tutorials to start. Avoid the personal/drama videos, it gets gross on youtube :/

Wayne Goss (important to consider when watching youtube videos!!!!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z1lovMzixm0

Lisa Eldridge (5 minute tutorial, no makeup look, she's a professional makeup artist) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_ZRjW1ZJLQ or https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oGpLLWnO3XY

Ali Andreea (do's/don'ts, a little exaggerated) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ooxyFoBZrXM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m0daIFQjLIc&t=549s

Tati Westbrook (do's/don'ts) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXzMjOOsgNU

Jaime French is fun (makeup starts at 2:40) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JheyOBF71CU

Jackie Aina (back to school fresh faced) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A4SNFqnnJbM

Sailor J not serious. Just hilarious https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJaaLXZwmsU

u/tlink98 · 3 pointsr/AskLGBT

> Are there any agreed-upon definitions for what those two identities mean with regards to sexual attraction?

Yes and no. What everyone can agree on is that bisexuality and pansexuality (and omnisexuality and polysexuality) are not monosexualities and not asexuality (this relationship holds if you replace all instances of "sexuality" with "romanticism"). Bisexuality and pansexuality (and omni and poly) are all about being attracted to people of two or more genders. So everything else, how many genders they're attracted to, how their attraction manifests, their preferences as they relate to gender, are not shared.

Because of this core shared element (at least 2 genders) and various differing periphery elements, there is lots of overlap and lots of disagreement. This is because 1) words are difficult, and 2) identity (what we decide to call ourselves and how we frame our understanding of ourselves) do not deterministically lead to the names we use.

> Is it fair to say that pansexuality falls under the umbrella of bisexuality?

This touches on the natural languages problems I mentioned earlier. There are may pan people (and omni and poly) who do also identify as bi, either for convenience or solidarity/community, but there are also lots of pan (and omni and poly) people who do not. Once again, this is all dependent on how the individual identifies.

For example: I'm pan (or omni, I'm still figuring that out). I like people regardless of gender (or of any gender. Again, still trying to figure out my feelings). However, I also identify as bi. This is because 1) it's often more convenient when I (rarely) try to explain to people what the hell I am, 2) I find my experiences match up fairly well with people who identify as bi (but not as much as people who identify as pan/omni), and 3) we face lots of the same issues (bi/pan/omni/poly erasure, bi/pan/omni/poly phobia). This operates in the same way that some bi people identify also as gay/lesbian. I personally think these overlapping, nested, and "inclusive" definitions are beneficial (especially for people still trying to figure things out), but there is also a desire from some people to be very discrete and exclusive with their identity.

> This would more or less be aligned with the notion that nonbinary folks (including myself) are part of the broader transgender community, but not all trans folks are nonbinary, right?

Yeah. Again, we have to remember that individual's identities come before any generalized categories.

> how come there is so much infighting over this?

Because these people often face erasure, we feel the need to, well, fight for our existence. This manifests in infighting whenever someone else uses your identity in a way that you don't use it.

> Does anyone know what the consensus is amongst gender/sexuality/LGBT scholars?

I have absolutely no idea. I imagine any scholarly works are 1) sparse, 2) new, and 3) still under investigation because of 1) and 2). I'll add an edit if I find anything.

EDIT: I remembered that some of my understanding is informed by Ash Hardell's The ABC's of LGBT, which covers a lot more of what I said starting from a place of descriptivism and exploration as opposed to prescriptivism. Might be worth a look for everyone else?

Misc. Thoughts

> Phrases similar to "bisexuality is so binary" were also used in that dialogue

I don't watch Big Head so I don't have the full context, but there are plenty of nonbinary people who identify as bisexual while attracted to more than two genders. The artist Meiko is an example of this. So again, bisexuality can be an umbrella for other identities (like pan, omni, poly, etc). However, you need only take a trip over to transphobic bisexual subreddits (that I really don't want to link) to discover that some bisexuals are restricted to the binary.

> Some viewers have taken to social media to voice their concerns over how the show's presentation of pansexuality versus bisexuality isn't nuanced enough.

Looking at the segment you linked, it seems basic but passable. It can get the general idea across, but obviously isn't some college lecture on the etymology, usage, and history of these terms.

A quick reminder of roots
I used lots of overlapping terms in this, so I'll just place the roots of those real quick and my own personal understandings of those. The roots are etymological, but the definitions that follow are my own personal interpretations that are useful for me. Other people will have other definitions, which, as you've already read, makes this challenging.

  1. Monosexual/monoromantic: The prefix "mono-" meaning "one." Someone sexually/romantically attracted to one gender.
  2. Asexual/aromantic: The prefix "a-" meaning "none." Someone who lacks/has a very low sexual/romantic attraction
  3. Bisexual/biromantic. "Bi-" is the latin prefix for "two," with the greek counterpart being "di-." Some takes bisexuality/biromanticism to mean sexually/romantically attracted to exactly two genders. Others (including myself) take it to mean sexually/romantically attracted to two or more genders.

  4. Pansexual/panromantic: from the greek prefix "pan-" meaning "all". This is usually used to mean people who are sexually/romantically attracted to people of any gender, but specifically regardless of gender. This bolded part is important because...

  5. Omniseuxal/omniromantic: from the roman prefix "omni-" meaning "all." You'll notice this, etymologically, is semantically identical to "pan-." However, most people who identify as omni use it to mean people who are sexually/romantically attracted to people of any gender, but not necessarily regardless of gender. For pan and omni people, this can be an important distinction because, for those who identify as omni, it can allow for preferences/different specific attractions depending on gender.

  6. Polysexual/polyromantic: From the greek prefix "poly-" meaning "many." Don't get this confused with polygamy or polyamory. Polysexual/romantic people usually identify this way because they are sexually/romantically attracted to more than two genders, but not necessarily people of any gender identity.
u/stophauntingme · 6 pointsr/fandomnatural

It's fair; inspirational messages and/or quotes don't really get me either unless there's some really innovative typography art to them (AO3's logo is a great example of that).

I do really like logos and/or symbols... If they put out more subtle designs with the heart around the supernatural star (with or without the rainbow colors; either would be awesome) as like a modest patch on the chest or sleeve, I'd dig that a lot more than anything with writing on it.

I really like this fan's design of the heart+star too... maybe more than the original.

Still, I have absolutely nothing against these things. And at least JP's messages are decent.

It was looking at this one - "You are enough" - that I found this -- apparently there's a new shirt out with pretty much the same exact design as the YANA shirt only it's Jensen solo and the message is "Be strong in the moments where you want to be weak -Jensen Ackles-"

Like, lol. That's not even very inspirational. It's got kind of an adversarial/invalidating edge to it like 'don't be weak even if you want to be for a moment' lol

Edit: oh it's "I am enough" not "You are enough." lol oh god Jared's ultimate mission is obviously turning us all into Stuart Smalley!!! ahhhh! hahahahah PS - Al Franken's Stuart Smalley book is incredibly awesome & funny

u/newyorknewyork · 1 pointr/lgbt

You can definitely be a mix of everything if you want, gender has no specific rules and a lot of what we consider to be "masculine things" vs "feminine things" are just social constructs.

It's also perfectly fine to be a cis-gendered man who feels like and identifies as a cis-gendered man, but wants to look like what society thinks girls look like some days. The great thing about personal identity is, is that it's personal...it's yours and you can choose to express what you feel however you want.

There are a LOT of labels out there - genderfluid, genderqueer, nonbinary, etc... A lot of people don't feel comfortable labeling themselves, but some people definitely do feel that labels can help them to better discover their identity and find community in shared experience, and either way is OK too.

I'd recommend getting a copy of the book, The ABC's of LGBT+ by Ashley Mardell - it does a really good job of examining sex, gender, and LGBTQ+ identity and might help you find some clarity.

It's on Amazon at the link above, but you might also be able to find it at your local library.

u/violettaquarium · 2 pointsr/RandomActsofMakeup

[How to Look Expensive: A Beauty Editor's Secrets to Getting Gorgeous without Breaking the Bank] (http://amzn.com/B007FEFD6A) is my latest favorite, because it has not only makeup tips, but also skincare, hair, and more, and it's all geared toward saving money. It's a quick read.

Also, I agree that [The Bobbi Brown Makeup Manual] (http://amzn.com/B001FA0NZ6 ) is an excellent choice to have in your arsenal. It's a good all-over read with a little bit of information about everything. My only reservation is that Bobbi's makeup style is very natural, so if you're into wild colors or daring looks, it might leave you unfulfilled.

[The Makeup Artist Handbook] (http://amzn.com/B006M9L3PO) is an excellent read if you REALLY like to geek out and learn about the very science of makeup. I still open this a lot and learn something new. :)

[Jemma Kidd Make-Up Secrets] (http://amzn.com/1250010861), or [Jemma Kidd Make-up Masterclass] (http://amzn.com/0312573715) by Jemma Kidd are excellent, for a different perspective.

I would suggest staying away from celebrity books, like Lauren Conrad. These aren't very informative and are more of a "this is how I am so beautiful" narrative. Who cares.

If I can think of any others I will let you know. :)

u/smurfsm00 · 2 pointsr/ptsd

Re-posting because I edited to add a few thoughts and links, and wanted to make sure you got the update. Here it is in full:

Do you use a weighted blanket? I don't have your condition but do have Generalized Anxiety & PTSD. I've always felt better when I had weight on me, kind of like an infant feels better swaddled. Do you ever use that therapy for SPD?

Another thing you may want to look into is EMDR Therapy. Here's a website: http://www.emdr.com I'm new to this concept myself but I've heard it's very useful for PTSD/Anxiety/Trauma.

Finally, here's another new therapy I'd never heard of that I think will be useful to me for working out issues of self-protection / fight or flight, etc. I don't know how this works into the brain of someone with Autism, but it seems to be a great therapy approach for coping with many things in life. It's called IFS - Internal Family Systems therapy. Basically the idea is you have many different sub-personalities inside you that help you to cope and live your life. Some of the sub-personalities are called "exiles" - those are the parts within your and your body that have stored trauma. Exiles are very vulnerable and sensitive, so other parts of our personality gathers around to protect it. Those protectors can be assertive protectors (i.e. they can block memories, or put it in perspective, etc) and others are self-soothing protectors (i.e. they encourage us to self soothe through drinking or doing drugs or isolating, etc.)

Here's a link to a great book on the subject of IFS - just began working through this book myself: https://www.amazon.com/Self-Therapy-Step-Step-Cutting-Edge-Psychotherapy-ebook/dp/B00452V8EG?ie=UTF8&psc=1&redirect=true&ref_=nav_timeline_asin

All sound worth looking into. I'm sorry you had to go through that trauma as a child. I'd like to add that I too have anxiety attacks where I don't trust myself out in public. My first one had in NYC, which was really scary. I had to ask my brother to help me walk across the street. Like you my proprioception (great word btw! had to look it up!) was out of whack, it was less that I thought I'd deliberately walk into the busy street, more like I couldn't trust where my body was in relation to things.

Sounds like you've done lots of work and gone really far in your process. I hope you find a solution to your anxiety attacks, and please post an update when you have one! Good luck to you!

u/VestaDear · -5 pointsr/TheGirlSurvivalGuide

I read this book called Cunt for my gender and sexualities class last fall. There is a chapter in the book where the author describes her experience in naturally inducing a miscarriage, and it's a really great read. She talks about carefully picking herbal supplements and teas to drink and having her massage therapist friend come over a couple times a week to massage her stomach.

It ends with the miscarriage falling on the floor at her feet when she was in the bathroom and just being amazed by how cool the whole experience was. The rest of the information in the chapter is outdated and irrelevant in terms of contraception methods, but that one little section is great.

I think the method that the woman went about to induce the miscarriage sounded pretty safe and awesome. She was able to terminate her pregnancy at home surrounded by the encouragement and love of her friends who were helping her.

u/bean_there · 6 pointsr/TheGirlSurvivalGuide

You sound like me when I was a teenager. I felt like a very sex-positive person, thought people should be able to enjoy sex without shame, etc, but my upbringing made me feel intense guilt when it came to myself.

My best advice is to not sweat it. You will still feel shame for a while, but it will fade over time. Stay your sex positive self and you will grow with your experiences. I also recommend reading some good erotica to get a positive view of people enjoying sex and masturbation. I found Clitical to be helpful- it's got masturbation tips and erotic stories and the like that makes everything seem a lot more.... normal?

I also found this book to be really helpful. I don't agree with everything the author says but her relentless sex-positiveness helped me get over some of the guilt instilled by years of religious upbringing.

I hope this helps.

u/PwntatoPie · 1 pointr/Makeup

There are a lot of really good books out there written by professional makeup artists and people in the industry. They are a good source of information for anyone interested in learning more about technique. A lot of makeup is hands on and practicing what works, but there is the side that also needs to know what would work for someone different than your usual test subjest (yourself) and how to fix problems as they happen. Here are a few I really like, but there are so many great ones to choose from, so ask her to looks and see which ones sound the best for what she already knows or knows she wants to learn. Other than that, I think the fact that you are asking here is great and a show of support like that will help her succeed in any endeavor. Best of luck!

Book 1
Book 2
Book 3

Edit: Fixed broken links.

u/CampCook3 · 2 pointsr/sad

Hey there, I'm writing a note to you - but haven't finished it yet. But just wanted to let you know so you don't go deleting your post :)

Ok... hope this helps some

Hi,

I was on the treadmill trying to kick these blues when I decided to see if /r/sad existed and came across your post.

First off, you seem really bright and friendly, kudos to you for being aware of your situation. I can imagine that living paycheck to paycheck is scary and stressful. Even though you say you are all over the place, that makes perfect sense – why… well, self-esteem, self-worth and how you define yourself are being challenged. I defined myself by my job, which made items at work affect me much more than they should have. But in the end it is all the little stuff that adds up to become stressful and can lead to bad habits (not enough exercise, junk food, drinking…) (at least in my experience). Major life changes definitely are playing a part. Try to remember to take care of yourself.

First, there is nothing wrong with expressing yourself. You have a right to feel the way you do even if you’re not sure exactly what that is. Let yourself feel, let yourself accept that it is ok to be anxious, concerned, or sad. While others can always be worse off, that doesn’t invalidate your feelings.

I have a hard time not giving some advice, so take what you want from this

Watch out for “the voice” in your head, it is the one that says “Should” a lot. You should be, you should have… Instead focus on saying “I’m working toward”, or “It isn’t perfect now, but this takes time and I know I can put in the effort”.

If you are in to books – maybe try this one: https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B00AKKS278/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?ie=UTF8&btkr=1
It’s a bit over the top, but it did help me to find some time for myself. There is always meditation, affirmations, or something to try – what you are doing now isn’t getting you where you want to be so shake it up, try something new. Maybe browse /r/personalfinance/ for tips.


Would it help to talk to your wife about how you feel? – I know; I don’t open up easily either. Would it help to break it up so it doesn’t feel so hard – meaning, instead of looking (worrying) about the future (what if the car breaks), just worry about the day or the week.

What really matters are your motives.

As Mr. Rogers would say, I like you just the way you are.

u/Tjodleik · 1 pointr/seduction

You can have what you want - A little unconventional, but it has some great advice regarding the most common mental traps and pitfalls, and how to deal with them.

The confidence gap - Definitely worth a read if you have confidence issues.

Lastly, while it's not a book or youtube video, if you can get your paws on the "Deep inner game" seminar from Double Your Dating I highly recommend watching it. It's old school, and some of the info is a bit dated, but overall I think it's very good.

u/jessatron9000 · 2 pointsr/RandomActsofMakeup

Thanks for hosting!

  1. I know this has been around for a long time , but dontevenreply.com makes me laugh out loud every time

  2. I could eat Chinese food every day, There is a really good, fancy Chinese restaurant not too far from where I love, a feast from there would be fantastic!

  3. It's less than $20, but I would really like this book

  4. I learned the other day that otters hold hands with their significant others while sleeping so they don't float apart.

  5. Flash This!
u/WeGonGetItPoppin · 5 pointsr/Dyslexia

I remember when I found out during my last year of high school. Very emotional but freeing at the same time. It was nice to know countless others struggle with the same difficulties. You begin to appreciate the way you think as time goes on and find special gifts and abilities that stem from your dyslexia. I highly suggest this book It really help me understand my strengths and weaknesses with dyslexia. Good Luck!!
(the book also available in audio!)

u/Xuber · 2 pointsr/Dyslexia

It usually isn't cover by insurance but they'll often apply the cost to your deductible. You mentioned your deductible will be met so you'll probably want to discuss that with your insurance company and the person doing the evaluation to know for sure. The last time I looked it was around 800-1200 USD for an evaluation.

I highly suggest using a provider from here: https://dyslexiaida.org/ida-accredited-provider-directory/. If you don't use a provider from that site then you should at least educate yourself on what should be done during an evaluation: https://dyslexiaida.org/dyslexia-assessment-what-is-it-and-how-can-it-help/.

Is it worth getting tested? It's not like there's a cure so what's the point? You can get accommodations depending on the country you live in for one. Personally I have found value with having objective information about what my strengths and weaknesses are. I also wanted to know for sure whether or not I was rather than speculate. There's a lot of benefits to be being dyslexic. I haven't read this yet, or more likely an audio version of it, but I've heard very good things about this book: https://www.amazon.com/Dyslexic-Advantage-Unlocking-Hidden-Potential/dp/0452297923

Please feel free to pm me if you have more questions.

u/[deleted] · 1 pointr/TwoXChromosomes

When my mom was in college, she gave me Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls. I was approximately your sister's age and found it to be helpful during my adolescence.

Additionally, my mom gave me a collection of feminist fairy tales (Don't Bet on the Prince) when I was around 9. Another good book would be Fearless Girls, Wise Women & Beloved Sisters: Heroines in Folktales from Around the World.

Finally, I would suggest The Hunger Games and Harry Potter. THG has a strong female lead and HP features several incredibly intelligent, strong female characters.

PS: You are an amazing sister!

u/heiferly · 1 pointr/TwoXChromosomes

I relish (and sometimes revile) certain sounds as well. I probably never would have liked the word cunt were it not for the imagery of this particular poem, quite frankly. I'm one of those people who has hang-ups about the mouth-feel of certain words (can't stand the way "panties" feels as it is articulated), and I think my studies of phonemes and articulators in my degree program (Speech and Hearing Science) only deepened this tendency. So I definitely understand where you are coming from on this. I've hear the Louie C.K. bit before and I do enjoy it! (There's quite a bit of his stuff that I like.)

I've been told I cuss like a sailor at times. I think it's because of what I held in at work (career with kids).

The poetry anthology is Claiming the Spirit Within and I'll go so far as to say it's worth more than what Amazon is hawking it for these days. Also, with regard to "cunt," there's a book by the same name. If you haven't read it, it's an interesting read. I can't say I agreed with it in its entirety, but it did get my gears turning and introduce some different perspectives in feminism to me.

With regard to medical terms, YES, there are some great ones out there. Although I find some disease names to be excessively impenetrable (particularly some of the spinal conditions which seem to be so similarly named and yet have such long names that it would be a bear to memorize them correctly ... thank goodness for reference materials).

u/parasitoid1 · 3 pointsr/intj

If you’re at the stage of looking into comparable websites during your development, check out Helen Fisher’s TedTalk about her research into love and hormones. She designed the test you take when creating an account on Chemistry.com, and I find it to be another really cool way of categorizing people and analyzing what matches work best most of the time. The book The Confidence Code actually talks about mutations in proteins related to some of the hormone traits Fisher describes that I didn’t know about until recently, pretty cool stuff. I hope it helps you in your search!

I’ll try to find the exact video later as I can’t find it right now.

Edit: here is the talk from Helen Fisher, it’s actually a Google talk

u/Ahzmosis · 3 pointsr/NoFap

If you're really interested in improving your confidence, read The Confidence Gap by Russ Harris.

The confidence gap is feeling like you can't do things unless you are confident. The book describes how the actions of confidence come first and the feelings of confidence come later, but it's not really fake it till you make it. It's more driven by acceptance of negative thoughts and feelings in order to neutralize them. Fake it til you make it can accentuate imposter syndrome.

Anyways if you're interested in improving your confidence in a real way (no positive affirmations, delusions of grandeur shit, that doesn't work), I highly recommend this book. It isn't that long, but it could make a big difference in your life.

u/chickpeas3 · 9 pointsr/adhdwomen

I don't have time at the moment to write a longer comment, but I HIGHLY recommend reading Women With Attention Deficit Disoder by Sari Solden. I'm about halfway through it myself and it's amazing, validating, and more helpful than I could've ever imagined. It's also arranged in a very ADHD friendly way. The sections are clearly explained, well organized, and broken into manageable chunks, and the paper is very highlighter-friendly (I've come across so many books lately that aren't that yes, the highlighter-friendly paper matters!). There's also audio and e-book versions if you prefer.

And if you like that book, this year she released a companion workbook (I also have that, diving into it after I finish the first one!).

Edit: fixed a word

u/MrPhil · 1 pointr/getdisciplined

I do something I call 15/30. I have these cool timer blocks I set it to 30 minutes and I just play/do what I feel like, sometimes that is laying in bed feeling blah. Then when it goes off I do 15 minutes of "what I don't want to do but can't avoid." Repeat. The basic principal is reward yourself for doing what you can handle one bite at a time. It isn't a silver bullet. It doesn't make you feel like sunshine and butterflies, but at least some of the crap you have to do gets done and off your back. And that helps.

This is a good book if you are looking to explore the concept: Mini Habits (I think it is even free for prime members)

u/rshambo_29 · 1 pointr/Anxiety

The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod:
https://www.amazon.com/Miracle-Morning-Not-So-Obvious-Guaranteed-Transform-ebook/dp/B00AKKS278?_encoding=UTF8&redirect=true&ref_=ku_mi_rw_edp

Ten Minute Cognitive Workout by Peggy Snyder (I can't recommend this one enough):
https://www.amazon.com/Ten-Minute-Cognitive-Workout-Minutes-ebook/dp/B00KYUAWSG?_encoding=UTF8&redirect=true&ref_=ku_mi_rw_edp


And finally, The Power of Time Perception by Jean Paul Zogby:
https://www.amazon.com/Power-Time-Perception-Control-Second-ebook/dp/B01MZEZL7S?_encoding=UTF8&redirect=true&ref_=ku_mi_rw_edp

Bonus points for Code of the Extraordinary Mind by Vishen Lakhiani:
https://www.amazon.com/Code-Extraordinary-Mind-Unconventional-Redefine-ebook/dp/B0182SMOBE?_encoding=UTF8&redirect=true&ref_=ku_mi_rw_edp


It's got some pretty radical ideas bu I loved every second of it. It made me see the world in a new light.

They're all part of Amazon Kindle Unlimited which has a 30 day free trial, tons of books for almost anything you can think of. I've been on the service now for a couple of months and love it.

u/lisaneedscaffeine · 2 pointsr/ADHD

I've been in CBT with various practitioners (practicing various forms of CBT, some with homework and specific programs/techiques, some not) off and on since my first baby. I was "well practiced' by the time we got to the ADHD diagnosis: my original issues were postpartum depression, anxiety, and family of origin issues. ADHD is the last piece of the puzzle (I think. :))

So, I have very successfully adapted the techniques I've learned to the ADHD situation. After all these years, just recognizing what's going on in my head is enough of a tool to make the necessary adaptations.

For one example, before I identified the ADHD, I COULD NOT find a reason to get up in the morning. I wake up in the morning and can't even remember a reason to get up - even if I set the alarm, i would forget that I had somewhere to be. Now that I'm aware of the ADHD, I have successfully identified why it was so hard to get up, what attitudes to get rid of, what physical and ADHD related things to adjust, and now I successfully get up at the same reasonable hour every morning, including weekends.

Regarding therapy, Sari Solden's book http://amzn.com/B008RDNRXE said, we have a "giftedness at disorganization" that makes it possible for us to break down the systems we've built up that aren't working, and rebuild new systems. I have definitely found this to be true in my life. I highly recommend you find a sympathetic, qualified counselor and go for it as part of your treatment.

[edit] If you would like more specific information, please ask. I'm not sure what to tell you because my experience has been pretty across the board.

u/GratefulToday · 7 pointsr/occult

I had great success with the Tower Of Light ritual, which is described in detail in Denning & Phillips's excellent Practical Guide To Spiritual Self-Defense. They prescribe daily use of the exercise for sensitives souls like you. :)

As a practicing magician, I rely on daily use of the Ritual of the Pentagram, adopted for my identification as a Thelemite. A Lesser Banishing Ritual in the morning and a Lesser Invoking Ritual in the evening have worked wonders over time. The ritual is described in clear detail in the article "It's In The Basics: The Pentagram Ritual", from The Black Pearl, vol.1, no.3, on page 14., available for free online from Temple Of Thelema.

u/munkigirl0 · 7 pointsr/MakeupAddiction

Making Faces by Kevin Aucoin I feel like he covers a lot of the basics really well here and also does a great job of showing some fun/dramatic stuff.

The Beauty of Color by Iman Was the only book I could find that did a good job talking about makeup specifically for women of color.

Bobbi Brown Makeup Manual: For Everyone from Beginner to Pro this is the only Bobbi Brown book I'd recommend, it does a great job of basics and tends to focus on more everyday makeup.

u/oh_gheez · 2 pointsr/Dyslexia

This is a copy paste of an email I've sent a couple of friends. My child has dyslexia and I found these resources useful. The Amazon links are not affiliate links or anything, just links to the books. The first two books were especially intersting and useful, and will apply even as an adult!

Dyslexic Advantage - by Brock and Fernette Eide


Overcoming Dyslexia - by Sally Shaywitz - the first part of the book is the most interesting - it's the science of dyslexia - the second is strategies for teaching/learning


Some other books:
I read them all - at least mostly - but I can't separate the info in my memory to remember which was best at what

u/BalanceArtist · 1 pointr/Meditation

Don't worry too much about this, you are still able to defend yourself if need be. Usually our behavior adapts to the environment.

If you want be more like that monk, I recommend to read the book The confidence gap. It makes the point that true courage or confidence is based on adherence to your own values and describes mindfulness based techniques to practice that.
He also explains that even the most courageous people experience fear. They just choose not to react to it:)

u/crod242 · 8 pointsr/TrueReddit

ACT might be a good fit as it incorporates a lot of the techniques of mindfulness. It tends to be more pragmatic than CBT and focuses on workable actions and values.

As the name implies, acceptance is also central. You're not looking to change your thoughts or even necessarily understand them as you learn to accept and defuse from them. This distance tends to help with the feedback loop of amplifying negative thoughts and reduce the brain fog you describe.

It's also easy to practice ACT alone. Anything by Steven Hayes or Russ Harris would be a good start as they both offer lots of exercises you can do on your own. I've found Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life and The Confidence Gap useful.

u/WhereWolfish · 3 pointsr/CPTSD

Yeah, sounds like you have very strong parts. You may want to check out the /r/Dissociation subreddit, as there are many folks there (though it's not super busy) who deal with different 'alters'. The IFS recommendation in the comments is also a good one. It's Internal Family Systems, and there are a number of books about it and a handy workbook that goes along with Jay's book (https://www.amazon.com/Self-Therapy-Step-Step-Cutting-Edge-Psychotherapy-ebook/dp/B00452V8EG)

Definitely bring this up with your therapist. I think it's cool that these parts of you see you as ready, that's great.

u/HemiSemiDemiLala · 3 pointsr/MtF

I have three points I'd like to add to this discussion.

  1. Regarding makeup: There's any number of free youtube videos on makeup where they will recommend a whole range of various stuff, though I'd dare say that much of the stuff is unnecessarily pricy and/or unnecessary. I've got a ten-step guide myself you might want to read. Also: the only thing you really need to buy in a store and test out is foundation: and it's fine to just check the match on the back of your hand or your cheek. If you insist on getting a book regarding this, I've heard a lot of good things about Bobbi Brown's Makeup Manual.
  2. Regarding walking: (cis)women have hips and walk as such - unless they're stiff Nordic people where everyone walks robotic (like me!). It's not really that difficult to walk more feminine though - Feminizationsecrets has an excellent video where they show an excercise in order to "open up" your hip movement. You can also start taking dancing classes or well... Do dancing exercises. It'll open up your hips.
  3. And lastly, EMOTIONAL LABOUR. Anyone would benefit from reading this collection of stories concerning this. Stereotypically, being a woman also includes thinking about EVERYTHING. Men tend to focus on "my stuff and my stuff only" (though I know enough exceptions to this "rule" to doubt it). I can't really summarize this good enough... Just read it.
u/cjcraig86 · 3 pointsr/Feminism

I second the recommendations for Adrienne Rich and Anne Fausto-Sterling. Here are a few other recommendations:
Kimberle Crenshaw's theory of Intersectionality,
Michel Foucault's History of Sexuality,
Bettina Apthekar's Intimate Politics,
W.E.B. Du Bois' theory of the Double Consciousness,
and if you want more of a pop fem approach, you should try Cunt

If you get more engaged with theoretical work by examining another work through that critical lens, you might enjoy watching Dark Angel and examining how issues of identification, gender, sexuality, and race play out through the main character.

Good luck and enjoy!

u/Nanna000 · 0 pointsr/RandomActsofMakeup

Congrats for a new job, makeup is a great career! :)

My personal favorites are this and this.

Both are very informative, from starters to pro.

I am a freelancer makeup artist and have learned a lot from those books also. :)

u/kaj_sotala · 4 pointsr/streamentry

> Emotions have their own distinctive feel to them, not quite a physical sensation, but close. It feels like the emotions are somehow above bodily sensations. That's my subjective experience of them. It's like the body is the earth, with the emotions being the grass growing on it. Or something.

> So I became aware of this sadness, not quite the same thing as the knot, but definitely linked to it, and I sat with it. I probed the knot for a while, trying to coax it into opening, releasing, while simultaneously using self talk. I realized after doing this for some time that what I was doing was sort of violent, so I backed off and tried a different approach that lead to a breakthrough.

> There was an impatience to the way I was relating to the sadness, I just wanted to get underneath it, move past it, have it purify itself away. Essentially, I didn't want to feel sad. I learned a while ago not to approach physical tension and pain like this. Why would the emotions, or anything else, for that matter, be different? To move through something so that it may pass is just as aversive as ignoring it. It creates yet more tension to have to deal with.

> So I changed my tone, the way I was speaking to it, the words I was speaking to it. I softened, relaxed emotionally (what a novel idea) and found myself feeling tender and vulnerable. I started to say things to the body like, "you've done a great job protecting me all these years by containing this sadness within you, but you don't have to any longer. It's okay to let go, I'm just going to lay here with you until you decide to open."

> It was a beautiful experience that led to some wonderful feelings of metta, karuna, and tenderness. The soft gushy stuff that is usually so foreign to me. This experience showed me in a direct way the power our thoughts can lend us. Hence the entire idea of Right Speech and Right Thought. I felt silly for never seeing this before.

If you haven't already done so, you may be interested in checking out Inner Relationship Focusing (1 2 3) and Internal Family Systems; what you describe here sounds very similar to them. They're basically detailed techniques for doing the kind of work you describe having done instinctively. (The "distinctive feel of an emotion" sounds like what Focusing usually calls a "felt sense".)

u/illiteratewomyn · 1 pointr/TwoXChromosomes

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Cunt-Declaration-Independence-Live-Girls/dp/1580050751

This book is seriously helpful. Even friends reading it in their 30s have been like "Ooooh!" Highly recommend it - don't be put off by the title. Honestly you'll get more out of it than you would ever imagine :) Be gentle with yourself OP.

u/sassathefras · 18 pointsr/konmari

I really like the Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod. It's unfortunately named, but it gives you an excellent morning routine to and way to implement it so that you can be more self-disciplined and work on important things in your life.

It was super helpful and it helped me to be a lot more productive.

u/GodoftheStorms · 10 pointsr/CPTSD

The fact that you're able to see clearly the trajectory of what happened to you is amazing.

Your parents, in their immaturity, robbed you of your rightful childhood course of development. This is called parentification. When a child is forced to be adult before their time, they develop a strong defensive false self: this means you had to dis-identify with your true self (who was a child at the time, and had childhood dependency needs, which includes the vital need for play) and take on a protective facade/veneer of maturity. Threatening to kill you or your pets or cut up your belongings, etc. would add an existential urgency so that it would strengthen your need to cling to the defense and dis-identify with your true self. Over an extending period of time living under such a threat, it becomes very hard to let the facade/veneer down and let yourself be vulnerable again. Unfortunately, living in a defensive mode robs us of our vitality, motivation, and true course of development.

I would highly recommend looking into Internal Family Systems (IFS). There is an excellent self-help book by Jay Early based on this system called Self-Therapy that can help you apply the principles of this therapy to yourself. Working with a therapist to help soften the need to defend and heal the interpersonal wounds is also something I'd highly recommend. The work of psychoanalyst D.W. Winnicott is particularly relevant to your experience, so I also recommend looking up his work, if you're curious and need validation.

u/cosmeticsnerd · 2 pointsr/xxfitness

Sure!

  • Healing ADD by Daniel Amen - some really great brain science here, well written and totally easy to grasp. The first one I read and one of the most helpful.
  • Driven to Distraction by Hallowell and Ratey - it was really valuable to see the focus on patient stories and on compassion for the ways people struggle with it in here. Reading about many different ways ADHD can manifest was super reassuring for me.
  • Women with Attention Deficit Disorder by Sari Holden - this one is definitely dated a little, but I wish I had read it sooner than I did, because there can be significant gender differences in how ADHD presents and women are often diagnosed much later in life because they are less likely to be disruptive and less likely to be hyperactive. This was the one that made me feel completely sure that I wasn't faking it or deceiving myself and that I had the right diagnosis.
u/lapetiteyogi · 2 pointsr/yoga

For my classes, I've drawn inspiration and material from various materials. Two that come to mind are Jack Canfield's Key to Living the Law of Attraction (http://amzn.com/0757306586) and The Daily Book of Positive Quotations (http://amzn.com/1577491742). I'll look in my notes later as well as check my book shelf to see what other sources I've been using. Hope those two help!

u/Marcellinos · 2 pointsr/transgenderUK

I don't know if this would be beneficial in your case, but apparently Julia Kaye's book "Super Late Bloomer" has helped a lot of family members understand their trans relative better, perhaps you can give it a try.

If interacting with them gets you down, just remember that you know you better than they know you. They may have been there throughout your whole life, but they aren't you, and they will never know who you are or how you feel on the most base of levels. Keep your head up and change without them, the world will change with you and they'll be left in the dust with the option to have their daughter back or be left in her wake. I believe in you, sister

u/CakeIsSpy · 36 pointsr/Guildwars2

I also had to quit GW2 due to it being too addicting. Personal two nickels: quitting video games cold turkey doesn't work, especially if you haven't changed your living environment, like the computer with all the potential games is right there in your house/apartment waiting to be played. It is an instant trigger reminding you to play again. My happy medium was strictly sticking to single-player games when I'm solo, and ONLY playing multiplayer/online games with people I have met and know in real life - as a way of socializing. Luckily the few friends that I have are busy and can only play on weekends so it's working out for now.

A few books that helped a TON in understanding why I had such a hard time quitting:

The Power of Habit

[Mini Habits] (https://www.amazon.com/Mini-Habits-Smaller-Bigger-Results-ebook/dp/B00HGKNBDK)

I hope it works out for you! IMO you are doing the correct thing getting back to old hobbies, but it definitely does take time.

u/DoctorToWhatExtent · 2 pointsr/Dyslexia

I share many of your symptoms and I have a mild case of dyslexia. The only way to know for sure is to get tested. It seems like you are well adjusted but its always good to know for sure. A good book to read to give you a bit more insight on dyslexia and its many variations is 'The Dyslexic Advantage'. It might give you a clearer picture of your breed of dyslexia or if you even have it.

u/dnedra · 2 pointsr/AskWomen

My wife had a similar issue. She had great success with this book: http://www.amazon.com/Bobbi-Brown-Makeup-Manual-Everyone/dp/0446581356

She is really good now! Super natural looking (she has really bad acne)

u/123username123 · 2 pointsr/Dyslexia

Ben Foss might be of interest to you; he's a dyslexic that focuses on strengths rather than weaknesses. He has a strength assessment on his website to help identify and map your dyslexia

http://headstrongnation.org/adults/map-your-dyslexia

This is from school-age kids perspectives, they discuss their experiences, and talk about finding their strengths.

http://www.amazon.com/All-Kinds-Minds-Abilities-Disorders/dp/0838820905

This might be a good one too

http://www.dyslexicadvantage.org/

http://www.amazon.com/The-Dyslexic-Advantage-Unlocking-Potential/dp/0452297923

I would steer clear of Ron Davis, he is widely disputed in the dyslexia world.


u/futurecrazycatlady · 2 pointsr/ADHD

I wish I could tell you with 100% certainty that it must be ADHD, but I can't.

I can tell you that I could have written your post. When I went to ask for help the focus was on depression and anxiety but the ADHD causing those was missed completely. It happens a lot, especially for people who are inattentive (and especially when your grades are good enough as is/you space out instead of causing trouble).

If you think it could be ADHD it's always worth to push to get tested. Even if you haven't (and they give you reasons that sound acceptable/make sense to you) knowing that it isn't ADHD will get you closer to figuring out what it could be instead. If you come across crappy health professionals who think adults can't have it, or it isn't a thing, keep pushing.

I get the feeling terrified of making it all up, I felt the same way. But your whole post oozes you only wanting to know what's wrong so you can do better and people who're looking for excuses to do less usually lack the whole 'feeling like shit about themselves' part.

I got diagnosed 2 years ago at 34 and I'm terribly lucky with how I respond to medication but even if it was half as effective as it is, it would still be enough to finally not fear the depression coming back.

You're not weird for wanting to get diagnosed and I sincerely hope it can make you the happiest turtle.

*edit to add: if you're a girl (you kinda read like one, but that could be me projecting) This book has been the best I found to explain both the ADHD and how to deal with a later diagnoses, without overly focusing on the 'marriage/kids' part.

u/spiralcutham · 10 pointsr/MakeupAddiction

>So basically, what are the basics of doing beauty makeup?

This is a crazy complicated question, I hope you realize.

If you're a reader, I highly recommend getting a copy of Bobbi Brown Makeup Manual.

She has lists of essential tools as well as step-by-step pics of how to make someone look purty. I'm a huge fan of hers because she has women of color in her book and the techniques work for various faces.

u/tehcuteness · 4 pointsr/RandomActsofMakeup

I love Kevyn Aucoin's books, including Making Faces and Face Forward, which alexis has mentioned! But my all time favorite beauty book is Bobbi Brown's Makeup Manual. A lot of great advice, whether you're an amateur looking to improve your skills for yourself, or if you're looking to go pro, it has advice for that, too! I do know that there was a link floating around with the entire text...so it might render the need to buy the book useless, unless you want a hard copy! Unfortunately, I don't have the link, though :(

u/mastermindtalks · 2 pointsr/IAmA

A friend of mine has a great book about morning rituals as well :)
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00AKKS278/

u/destiny_manifest · 1 pointr/TwoXChromosomes

Check out a book called Cunt: A declaration of Independence. It's a great fun to read, very sex positive and offers a contemporary re-lensing of women's issues.

http://www.amazon.com/Cunt-Declaration-Independence-Expanded-Updated/dp/1580050751

u/LordP123 · 2 pointsr/benzodiazepines

I've been doing ACT for about a year now after 2-3 years of CBT. I've also done group therapy, and for ACT the required book that helped me start to understand/get a little better was called 'The Confidence Gap' by Russ Harris. Here's an amazon link, I definitely recommend getting it:

http://www.amazon.com/The-Confidence-Gap-Overcoming-Self-Doubt/dp/1590309235/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1409960005&sr=8-1&keywords=the+confidence+gap

u/dumpbox · 1 pointr/Habits

Life is too short. I advise you listen to this book titled "how to be an imperfectionist: the new way to self-acceptance, fearless living, and freedom from perfection" it helped me a lot.

You can grab it from kindle store or on audible.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00UMG535Y/ref=oh_aui_d_detailpage_o04_?ie=UTF8&psc=1

u/HubbleSaurusRex · 1 pointr/TrollXChromosomes

I read in a book called the confidence code that men typically apply for jobs when they think they meet around 60% of the qualifications, and women typically apply for jobs when they think they meet around 95% of the qualifications. If you are female and applied for the position, this could mean you are lots more qualified than you think.

https://www.amazon.com/Confidence-Code-Science-Self-Assurance-What-Should/dp/006223062X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1502140324&sr=8-1&keywords=the+confidence+code+for+women

Best of luck at the interview!

u/Varo · 4 pointsr/AskFeminists

There are many different types of feminism. Post modern feminsim is my personal favorite. It focuses on the defense of the other. "The other" is whatever person or group of people gets the short end of the stick. For example, in parental rights, men are currently at an unfair disadvantage. It is very difficult for a father to get custody of his children, even if he is the more deserving parent. So, post modern feminists are for defending a man's right to fatherhood.

"The other" can also be a race or religion that is being oppressed by the majority. Post modern feminism gets away from gender centric issues. Many post modern feminists do not believe in gender at all. Sex is determined by biology, but gender is completely constructed by society. So to answer your first question, post modern feminists do not believe there are any differences between the sexes other than the genitalia.

It is important to understand that no feminist speaks for all feminists. When I was your age I read Cunt. I recommend it to anyone interested in learning more about feminist discourse. Not all feminists, myself included, agree with every word in the book, but it is a good jumping off point.

u/SpottieOttieDopa · 1 pointr/TwoXChromosomes

I agree with all the comments that say go to sephora. They aren't on commission, sales staff are very helpful at choosing products, and take into account if you're on a budjet.

I also recommend Bobbi Browns books. They are makeup books with lots of pictures and guides, and sections for choosing each to type of makeup, and also advice for caring for your skin. I bought this one, which is all I need

http://www.amazon.ca/Bobbi-Brown-Makeup-Manual-Everyone/dp/0446581348

u/PracticalProgress4 · 3 pointsr/IncelTears

Yeah, I think I do have a dysmorphia. I want to try to treat this myself before going through some kind of therapy though, and I think that's mostly because I don't have any health insurance and don't really have any experience with therapy.

Thinking about reading this,

https://www.amazon.com/Broken-Mirror-Understanding-Treating-Dysmorphic/dp/0195167198/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1526973118&sr=8-2&keywords=bdd

might help me. Thanks for the input.

u/JacquesDeMolay13 · 2 pointsr/Dyslexia

The neurodiversity view is that dyslexia is a different brain type, with an atypical set of advantages and disadvantages, rather than simply a defective brain.

Many dyslexics find they are unusually good at certain things. For me, I can spot patterns or solutions in situations that are so complex that most people find them intractable. But, I struggle working through linear, systematic tasks. The hard stuff feels easy to me and the easy stuff feels hard.

This isn’t just anecdotal. There is research to back in up. Dyslexics perform well above average on certain tests and below average on others. Check out The Dyslexic Advantage:

https://www.amazon.com/Dyslexic-Advantage-Unlocking-Hidden-Potential/dp/0452297923/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?crid=1IG4B9XQWBL7H&keywords=the+dyslexic+advantage&qid=1556288038&s=gateway&sprefix=the+dyslex&sr=8-1

u/mtempissmith · 1 pointr/Psychic

https://www.amazon.com/Psychic-Self-Defense-Instruction-Protecting-Paranormal/dp/1578635098/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1467394408&sr=8-1&keywords=psychic+self+defense

https://www.amazon.com/Llewellyn-Practical-Psychic-Self-Defense-Llewelyn/dp/0875421903/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1467394408&sr=8-4&keywords=psychic+self+defense

These are two classics that I like. I think they're a good buy and helpful and they basically describe what I do. Some of what I do is personal, related to religious training. I don't want to get into that. These offer a decent foundation. Both of them are pretty old but good to start with I think.

u/Stessanie · 1 pointr/ADHD

I haven't read either of these in their entirety, but I've found helpful stuff in both:

Survival Tips for Women with AD/HD: Beyond Piles, Palms, & Post-its

Women With Attention Deficit Disorder: Embrace Your Differences and Transform Your Life

Sari Solden is kind of the premiere expert on adult ADHD in women, so her book - much like her website - is full of great stuff even though it looks dated.

u/SteelTheWolf · 1 pointr/OutOfTheLoop

This would be a great question for /r/asklinguistics. A quick search shows only that someone asked how old it is.

A little bit of searching though brings up this interesting article that states:

>According to McDonald, “cunt” was used to refer to the vagina without any suggestion of vulgarity until roughly the end of the fourteenth century.

Also of interest, there is a book that claims it used to be a term of reverence.

I would ask the linguists though.

u/korravai · 3 pointsr/humor

I read this book in high school on a feminism bender. It has a lot of nonsense but I did enjoy the first chapter where she has you say "cunt" a bunch out loud. She's like, isn't this word so much more fun to say and more powerful sounding than vagina? (Which it is really haha.) Isn't that such a shitty word, vagina? (I don't really think so, but she does point out that vagina means sheath which obviously led to statements like "I am nobody's sheath for their sword!!".) The book may have rubbed off on me a little because I do kind of enjoy saying the word cunt, and forget sometimes how much it horribly offends people.

u/Rouknette · 1 pointr/AdviceAnimals

Just do your best to be a general nice person and know that there might be times you'll have to correct yourself and do so gracefully and you should be fine. The internet naturally brings out the worst in a lot of people and it is not a true reflection of the world. If you're really interested in learning more and you're not opposed to some reading I recommend taking a look at the book that helped me: The ABC's of LGBT+ by Ashley Mardell

u/jmurphy42 · 21 pointsr/AskWomen

>I just find my experience so much different than yours that I kind of have to call bullshit.

Were you a teenage girl? No? I didn't think so. You don't get to tell us that our experience was invalid because you didn't notice it while you were off being a boy and getting reinforced for giving your input. We're the ones who lived it, and I cannot begin to tell you how many times I had a male teacher roll his eyes at me and tell me to quit raising my hand so much. In calculus in HS my teacher once accused me of reading ahead in the book to try to look smart because I always knew the answers, then told me to shut up and give the boys a chance. And I'm 33 too.

It's great that you value your daughters' input and want to validate them, but you won't do them any favors at all by denying that this is a problem that is pervasive in our society. There's so much research out there that you can't help but trip all over it if you spend a few minutes on Google. This, however, is one of the seminal texts on the subject. I highly recommend you check it out, and your public library is likely to have a copy.

u/flyinglunatic · 5 pointsr/reddit.com

"I'm Good Enough, I'm Smart Enough, and Doggone It, People Like Me!" Daily Affirmations By Stuart Smalley

u/L_xo · 2 pointsr/amiugly

You are definitely not ugly. You have a great profile and a nice face.
BDD is s bitch. Fellow struggler here, so I feel ya.

I read this book called, ["The broken mirror"] (http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0195167198/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1381246235&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX110_SY165)
by Katherine Phillips over and over and found it very helpful, so you may want to give it a read :-)

u/Full_Capacity · 1 pointr/cscareerquestions

>Also you said you handled too many people like that, so isn't this the norm already in the world? So why isn't this new norm being embrace by people? What learn the hard way?

Because it's not a new norm. This is the old norm that a new generation of people, including me, are trying to replace. That's why "entry level" doesn't mean what you think it means... anymore. "Entry level" describes the pay grade, more often than not.

Why do you think so many of those jobs have ridiculously high requirements? Because each successive generation become quicker at learning from the previous generation and then continuing to push the bar even higher.

>Mozart as a young musician, compared to today’s good young musicians, would be relatively average. How can this be? This relates to the third point about Mozart. For his time, he was excellent. But over time, we humans generally become more excellent. Standards of excellence have risen, often a lot.

How to Become Great at Just About Anything

I do understand that, one day, I will be replaced. Hopefully, the next generation will be even stronger, better, faster, and smarter than me. I do what I can to contribute to their understanding of the world and how it works, and I want to learn from them as well. If I can successfully connect my past to their future in our present, I will always have a fighting chance.

This field is fast-moving. Shape up or ship out. Here's a book recommendation.

---

>Because they should not even use any metric to determine who to hire in the first place for a entry level role, condemning people who are bad completely.

I think it's a good thing to condemn people who are bad and refuses to fix their own problems. They made their decisions, and they get to suffer the consequences. Tough shit. I chose to address my flaws, and I got rewarded for it. This is how life works.

In my opinion, people who refuse to take responsibility for their own life and fix their own problems should not be rewarded or supported in any way... until they fix their problems. They did not do anything to deserve a reward, and they did many things that deserve punishment.

It's unfair to the people did their best to improve themselves to have to deal with problems from lazy, irresponsible people.

>When you were once a fresh grad and if no one is going to give you a chance, do you have today life as an experienced person working? You would be forever stuck at Square 1 isn't it?

Uh, I hate to tell you this, but even unpaid college internships have requirements. And I had to have at least one internship in order to graduate.

You see, I taught myself how to program. On my own time. When people saw the results of my efforts, if they like what they see, then they decide to invest in me.

You didn't do that. You have no skin in the game, so why would anyone risk their investment on someone who isn't proven? Your sob story is your own fault. You did this to yourself, you refuse to fix your problems that lead you into the hole you're in, and you deserve it. If you refuse to comply with other's expectations and prove yourself to them, then they will not give you chances.

---
This job posting has a requirement that you do not meet. When a company specifically asks for a language, it is too much to expect that the company will be interested in teaching you how to program. "It's a job, not a college course."

"Learning how to program" and "learning a language" are two different, but related things. That's also why people said that if you don't know ruby specifically, then perhaps you can repurpose knowledge from a different programming language. That's what "transferable skills" mean.

Companies can't train you because you don't have the prerequisite skills. It's like asking to get into a freshman-level class, but your grades from high school and your test scores were too low, so you have to take a remedial class first. Or when you enter grad school, you still have to take undergrad classes if you don't know the material from those classes.

Companies believe that the prerequisites are the applicants' responsibility. If you disagree, then just go apply anyway and figure it out for yourself.

You said you will not join a company that cares about skills and results. You know what this field cares about? Results. Literally, return values of a function are results. Based on what you said, it sounds like you wouldn't like this job or this field. Go find a position that meets your criteria. Apply to those instead.

u/grabyourmotherskeys · 1 pointr/productivity

I also like the approach of slow adoption (Mini-Habits https://www.amazon.ca/Mini-Habits-Smaller-Bigger-Results-ebook/dp/B00HGKNBDK?ie=UTF8&*Version*=1&*entries*=0) where you just make really small changes. These seem easier to keep up.

For example I would say "go the gym one morning a week" and once that is a habit you go twice... before long you'll realize that you can go every day if you want since you have the one day a week thing figured out (and going twice is only marginally harder, etc).

I also find scheduling too tightly is a mistake. If you are really making progress on something and you don't have an external obligation just keep going! That is what you will want to do and what you should do. The only exception is if "keep going" is actually harmful to your other goals. But rather than "record music for one hour everyday" why not say "I would like to record music for 5 hours a week".

Finally, one hour blocks don't really allow much time for context switching.

u/literallyjusttrans · 24 pointsr/asktransgender

My mom never really understood the impact of misgendering until she read Super Late Bloomer. She said it painted a very good picture of the feeling. Mind you, she may be more supportive than yours. But it is a good collection of comics regardless.

That said, this by a trans woman so it might be confusing if she doesn't understand the difference.

u/SerinaLightning · 3 pointsr/AskReddit

If she hasn't already read it, the book Cunt. This is the book that got my most intense feminist friend into the whole feminism thing :)

u/229sweet_rolls · 1 pointr/BodyAcceptance

I think it is very likely you have BDD. I'm not qualified to diagnose of course, but I've done a lot of reading about it and you sound like a textbook case. Here is a book about BDD that discusses CBT and other treatment options, it's very thorough and I would really recommend it.

u/vanderpyyy · 6 pointsr/DysmorphicDisorder

BDD is a preoccupation with a perceived physical deformity or overall appearance. Whether the deformity exists or not, the disorder is in the mental preoccupation/obsession, not the physical reality.

Yes you do have BDD. I can relate to everything you said and I have BDD too. It sucks, and I'm sorry for both of us, but we have to keep moving forward. We have to gradually accept that our perceptions are not consistent with others' or reality, and actively reject them in favor of more favorable, realistic perceptions of ourselves. That's what therapy is great for.

You sound stressed. Stress increases the obsessions, which in turn increase the stress. Try to reduce your stress by doing physical activities and keeping busy. Never accept your negative self-view as reality. Always remember that with BDD, you have a negative bias toward yourself. It's not a bias based in reality, it's only in you and it can be fixed and you can live a happy life. Don't ever give up hope. You are beautiful.

Read: [The Broken Mirror] (https://www.amazon.com/Broken-Mirror-Understanding-Treating-Dysmorphic/dp/0195167198/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1520889982&sr=8-1&keywords=the+broken+mirror)
It will give you a lot of insight on the disorder.

u/fancytrashpanda_ · 3 pointsr/ADHD

So relatable. Check out Sari Solden's book too, on women with ADHD! It has a somewhat cheesy title about embracing your differences, but the content inside is super relevant and well-told. https://www.amazon.com/Women-Attention-Deficit-Disorder-Differences-ebook/dp/B008RDNRXE

u/Bathtub_Monarch · 5 pointsr/occult

Work smarter, not harder.

Will is a resource that needs to be conserved and used wisely. If you want to quit smoking, but surround yourself with smokers, you're going to waste a lot of willpower.

Read Denning and Philip's guide to psychic self-defense.

https://www.amazon.com/Llewellyn-Practical-Psychic-Self-Defense-Llewelyn/dp/0875421903

Use it to rid your life of the things and people who want to hijack with your will. Then create the context that makes the actions you want to accomplish more convenient.

u/erienne77 · 2 pointsr/loseit

Set a daily minimum so that it's almost impossible not to meet it. Set one for what you eat and one for working out. For instance, for what you eat, your minimum habit is to drink one glass of water every day. For working out, your goal is three push ups every day. Once you get some success behind you, it will snowball from there and you will find yourself back in the swing of things. I highly recommend this book for details on this technique: Mini Habits

u/notunremarkable · 1 pointr/productivity

Read The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod. It'll help you create your own routine but with certain parameters.

u/HiddenPerson · 3 pointsr/getdisciplined

Yeah I've been struggling with decreasing my perfectionism for about a year now, since I came to the realization that I was a perfectionist in many aspects of my life (both school and socializing). It wasn't until the last month though that I read this book and the "Now Habit", as well as "Feeling Good" which I read beforehand and actually applied the exercises in these books to my life that I saw improvement.

I find that because of the stereotypes associated with perfectionism a lot of people don't realize that they are perfectionists. I know this was the case with me (cause I never really obsessed with being organized, my perfectionism takes a different form) and I see it in other people all the time. Other people also think that perfectionism is a good trait to have, but as I read somewhere: perfectionism is the "worst form of self-harm".

u/StarBelliedSnitches · 3 pointsr/DecidingToBeBetter

https://www.amazon.com/Mini-Habits-Smaller-Bigger-Results-ebook/dp/B00HGKNBDK


you might get a kick out of that book I posted, pretty much right in line with what you discovered by yourself, might have some additionally helpful info.

u/catnipfarts · 1 pointr/CPTSD

I got five licenses with my original purchase and I think I've maxed them out, but here is a link to the book:

https://www.amazon.com/Self-Therapy-Step-Step-Cutting-Edge-Psychotherapy-ebook-dp-B00452V8EG/dp/B00452V8EG/ref=mt_kindle?_encoding=UTF8&me=&qid=1571173846

The kindle version is pretty affordable at 8.49, or you can buy the PDF with five licenses on their website for 9.99.

u/Lenchik · 3 pointsr/TheGirlSurvivalGuide

Confidence code. FYI, it piggybacks off Lean In so it skews towards professional. Amazon Link

u/ducksrevenge · 7 pointsr/AskReddit

I am a woman and I use the word cunt regularly. Generally to great effect.
I'm not terribly vulgar (but I can be) so it usually has a much heavier shock factor than I anticipate.

Syntax should mean little. Unfortunately it is not always the case.
Some chicks need thicker skin.

This book, titled Cunt: A Declaration of Independance does a pretty good job of covering the subject (although it is pretty heavy on the feminist side).

From the reviews on Amazon:
>Striving to remove the negative connotations from a word usually used as a scathing insult, Muscio traces the history of the term "cunt" and asserts that it was once a term of respect before the patriarchy turned it into a profane, misogynistic epithet. This transformation, she insists, occurred as part of a conspiracy to make women feel a sense of self-loathing and uncleanness; only by reconnecting with love for their genitalia can women achieve personal and political power.






u/lysa_m · 1 pointr/WTF

A friend of mine has that book too. She was looking for tattoo ideas.

> Apparently that terminology was once a bit more acceptable.

http://www.amazon.com/Cunt-Declaration-Independence-Live-Girls/dp/1580050158

u/floatingpointexcep8n · 1 pointr/loseit

One thing that has helped immensely with my anxiety and perfectionism is this book. I really recommend it, it's full of practical tips and goes straight to the point.

u/beadmaze · 2 pointsr/Parenting

My mom got me a book "Reviving Ophelia" It's a parenting resource and she used it to talk with me but also let me read it. It was really useful and you might find that it touches on similar issues.

u/Tamerlana · 3 pointsr/selfimprovement

Mini Habits: Smaller Habits, Bigger Results by Stephen Guise

Explains why motivation is not everything and you should not depend on it. Makes easier to develop habits.

u/pixikins78 · 1 pointr/Parenting

Reviving Ophelia - Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls: http://www.amazon.com/Reviving-Ophelia-Saving-Selves-Adolescent/dp/1594481881/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1417018161&sr=8-1&keywords=reviving+ophelia

This is the psychology/parenting book that the movie Mean Girls was very loosely based on. I read it before the movie was made, when I was in high school. I plan to re-read it when my daughter gets a bit older. The book is very helpful when trying to figure out what makes your teenage girl tick, and it's written simply enough for an older child/teen to read as well.

u/BlackLeatherRain · 1 pointr/politics

I would agree with this 100%. I wish it were more socially acceptable to use, personally.

Also, it makes for an awesome book.

u/LindsayRR · 1 pointr/RandomActsofMakeup

Omg I've never been GLAMMED I'm excited for this. Glam me please

Does [this] (http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B001FA0NZ6/ref=aw_ls_3_3?colid=3RA5CL73UQQYG&coliid=I3SXUSH88STLJG) count as my < $10 thing?

u/WhoTookPlasticJesus · 6 pointsr/AskAnAmerican

FWIW there are some etymologies that trace it back to a term of reverence. But its oldest written English translation is to the placename Gropecuntlane, which was exactly what the placename suggests. It's best not to use term unless you know your audience.

It's pretty fucking bad even in parts of America that look the other way at offensive language. I'd put it below the n-word, maybe below R , but around the same level as F. For whatever reason "twat" is a more acceptable term, maybe because it isn't as harsh-sounding?

In a pinch call somebody an asshole. Everybody's has one of those.

u/sguise · 1 pointr/getdisciplined

Mini Habits is the highest rated habit book on Amazon (4.7 stars) because it works and has changed thousands of lives. It's the ultimate discipline book: the premise is consistency in action over quantity. Discipline needs to eventually become a subconscious function, as otherwise we'll run out of willpower. Mini Habits gets you to habit with easy, daily targets (preserving willpower while forming a base habit to build from).

My story: I do full workouts every day now. I started by doing one push-up a day. I read and write every day too because of my mini habits.

Disclaimer: I'm the author (and first beneficiary!) of Mini Habits. I wrote the post in the FAQ about motivation not being the start, which is a key part of the Mini Habits strategy.

u/Ky_kapow · 5 pointsr/AskWomen

I love the word cunt, but I don't use it lightly. It's a pretty emotionally charged word.

Here's one of my favourite books, all about the origin, history and modern uses of the word!

http://www.amazon.com/Cunt-Declaration-Independence-Expanded-Updated/dp/1580050751

u/eternallyfemale · 34 pointsr/GenderCritical

So, telling your mom that you're something that doesn't exist ("queer", trans and now non-binary) is "beautiful"? All in 2 years. Is she going through all the labels she wrote about in her book, which she calls "super-gay"? How old is she, for crying out loud? [edit] 26? Really? Acts like 12 and sounds like 6.

Using that pollyanna personality to blog her life and get "fans". What normal person does that if they have little or no talent?

If I were her mom, I'd take her to a decent therapist and find out what issue(s) is involved in her disordered thinking. Mom already knew because she read the book that her daughter wrote:

The ABC's of LGBT+ Paperback – September 25, 2016

https://www.amazon.com/ABCs-LGBT-Ashley-Mardell/dp/163353409X/ref=redir_mobile_desktop?_encoding=UTF8&keywords=abcs%20of%20lgbt%2B&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&psc=1&qid=1519424208&ref_=mp_s_a_1_1&sr=8-1-spons

Mom: "Whatever."

u/bijaji · 2 pointsr/fringefashion

I have found Acceptance and Commitment Therapy incredibly helpful (for many things, but especially this). Most health insurance covers counseling, which is appropriate for anyone who feels their life isn't working for them and wants to make changes. If you'd prefer the self-help route, here are some books: basic intro, anxiety-specific, and self-confidence specific.

u/shanemitchell · 2 pointsr/getdisciplined

I would recommend the book Mini Habits, it does a great job of explaining why going cold turkey doesn't work, but incremental habits that are given time to become ingrained habits is the bets approach.

u/TheOtherRoomba · 7 pointsr/transitiongoals

Not to mention the fact that her book Super Late Bloomer was what helped me realize I was trans, everyone go support her !!

u/duffstoic · 3 pointsr/getdisciplined

I've done similar things to get out of depression. See also Mini Habits by Stephen Guise, great book.

I think this works for several reasons:

  1. It is so small it seems doable, even with zero willpower.
  2. You are making the tasks concrete which helps get you into an action-oriented mindset and out of a deliberative (will I do it?), ruminating mindset.
  3. You do what you say you will, which builds self-trust and confidence that you can follow through on larger tasks. Many people are depressed in part because they keep saying they will do X and don't do it, so after a while they stop believing in their ability to do anything.
u/lizzehness · 1 pointr/TwoXChromosomes

I found CUNT to be a particularly interesting read.

u/abishop711 · 3 pointsr/muacirclejerk

She does have a book not directed specifically for teens, if you're interested. this one

u/generalgrant · 1 pointr/internetparents

This may only be part of the equation of learning to stop yourself, but a good book for when you're feeling helpless to create motion in your life is:

https://www.amazon.com/Mini-Habits-Smaller-Bigger-Results-ebook/dp/B00HGKNBDK

If you can do one push-up in a day or read two pages of a book, or something with a similarly small amount of effort, you can do what's in the book.

u/shahrushabh1290 · 1 pointr/getdisciplined

I have the same problem. I am always afraid of people judging me. I would recommend you read this book - How to be an imperfectionist. I have found the ideas in the book to be helpful in getting over this.

u/LiftingDepression · 2 pointsr/EOOD

This book explains that motivation is an unreliable source for action. Stephen Guise, Mini Habits: Smaller Habits, Bigger Results.

u/Prana555 · 1 pointr/NoFap

Yeah, I come back to that when I need a pick-me-up. Two books I'm reading also that you might like...the first one he mentions in that post:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00GDKN3T6/ref=rdr_kindle_ext_tmb

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00AKKS278/ref=rdr_kindle_ext_tmb

u/sprucenoose · 1 pointr/funny

In the 1970s, during what many call the first feminist movement, there was drive to eliminate the common usage of words that were derogatory towards women. "Cunt" was at the top of that list. More recently, there is a movement towards women "reclaiming" it, much as the African American community reclaimed the racial slur "nigger".

Here's a whole fucking book on the word.

Wikipedia touches on it

Nerve.com

UK perspective from Guardian article

u/azoerb · 1 pointr/selfimprovement

Personal Development for Smart People by Steve Pavlina was the first self-improvement book I read and I really enjoyed it. It's pretty straight-forward and intelligently written. It's been a while since I read it, so I can't remember many specifics, but it helped me start to get my life back on track after being depressed for a while.

More recently, I read Mini Habits by Stephen Guise which really helped me with forming lasting habits.

u/bunyip · 1 pointr/BodyAcceptance

It's been a while since I read the 2005 Broken Mirror and I no longer have it to compare, but the 2009 book seems to cover some stuff I don't remember seeing. Maybe compare the two via Amazon previews? (Also, the newer paperback seems to be on sale for $5.98!)

u/turtlebesos · 1 pointr/SRSWomen

I went through something somewhat similar and found I had body dysmorphic disorder. I saw someone who specialized in BDD and OCD which helped and taking the right meds really really really helped. The Broken Mirror is also worth reading to better understand BDD.

u/vswr · 1 pointr/RandomKindness

First, I want you to read The Confidence Gap. Some of the things will seem stupid, silly, or cheesy, but please, do it.

Next, I want you to read Models: Attract Women Through Honest. It's a poor title. It's not misogynistic bullshit and it's not a magical "here's how to get hot women."

Then I want you to go out and get shot down on purpose. Seriously. Go out to a bar and the first 10 women you see, use what you learned from reading those two books. Get rejected 10 times.

Congrats! You've now learned that getting rejected doesn't mean anything. Nothing is wrong with you, nothing is wrong with the women, they're just not interested. The end.

u/islander85 · 2 pointsr/Dyslexia

[Here's one that has a few tips] (https://www.ghotit.com/2010/07/tips-living-with-dyslexia)

Here's one about the emotional repercussions of not knowing. You might find this useful, quite a few of these points hit home for me. It's kinda depressing but at the same time it fits a lot of seemingly random pieces together.

I would recommend this book as well it does have a few chapters near the end about dealing with school, I just missed them out.

u/LinesOpen · 4 pointsr/OkCupid

I am simply highlighting a woman's agency to reclaim a word of its harmful power

u/wiredrone · 2 pointsr/Entrepreneur

https://www.amazon.in/Mini-Habits-Smaller-Bigger-Results-ebook/dp/B00HGKNBDK

This book helped me out a lot. I don't think it's for everybody, but in my case it worked.

u/deviantrockstar · 2 pointsr/MakeupAddiction

Make Up book for a beginner: [Bobbi Brown Make Up Manual] (http://www.amazon.com/Bobbi-Brown-Makeup-Manual-Everyone/dp/0446581356) - this books covers everything and is very practical.

What type of products does she currently use?

u/allrite · 2 pointsr/getdisciplined

There's a book I read that had a similar philosophy: Mini Habits: Smaller Habits, Bigger Results https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00HGKNBDK/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_d1cLwbNYG382E

It's an intriguing idea. I'm more of a "focus on one thing at a time" kind of person. I take one habit and try to inculcate that in my routine, and then after few months, try to move to next.

u/_eka_ · 1 pointr/argentina

Lee esto si podes, a mi me ayudo mucho.

How to be an imperfectionist

u/Prazzie · 3 pointsr/MakeupAddiction

Some resources for you:

u/jsh · 4 pointsr/theXeffect

I disagree with this guy, 5 minutes is better than nothing as getting started is the hard part. See the mini habits book.

u/three_rivers · 4 pointsr/stopdrinking

For me it was realizing that everyone in the job world is just as full of shit as I am. Realizing it's a game and I'm getting very good at it.

Also, this book.

u/hsp_hsp · 1 pointr/introvert

So you are saying you want to stop doing your regular job and transition to freelance full-time?

I know you say you don't have time to look for more clients, and I hate being a hardass, but many of the productivity coaches I've learned from would say, "Yes, you DO have more time." Get up earlier in the morning (check out the "Miracle Morning" book). Work on finding clients when you get home from work and on weekend. No TV watching or web surfing. You've got to hustle and work hard to make this transition happen. Working for oneself, in my opinion, is harder than working in an office where you have a boss who tells you what to do. It's not going to be easy.

I hate saying these things because they sound so bossy and kinda mean, but they are probably true.

You could quit your job first, but that is risky, of course.

If you have kids, I don't know how this would work. I don't have kids and I don't know how people with kids make time. :)

u/preveyt · 5 pointsr/SRSBusiness

All my feminist friends have read a book called Cunt. I know nothing about it but the title has, for understandable reasons, stuck with me over time.

u/emptysignifier · -3 pointsr/metanarchism

Because the word has been used to oppress women. Period. If a word has been used in a pejorative sense on a wide scale towards a subset of the population that has traditionally not been in power, then its a pretty good bet that its oppressive language. this book aside, its a pretty well known word for being pejorative (type in cunt to google and see what comes up. Does that look like a word that isnt oppressive?)

Well, yes, counterrevolutionary is overused, but an angry and dramatic response that shuts down communication doesn't help anyone.

u/ArtistBlock · 1 pointr/depression

Holy shit bro you have more balls than me! I'm too scared to go to bars and pick up chick. Give yourself some props, at least you can say "I tried" Also read this book, it helped me and can help you.

u/OH_NO_MR_BILL · 1 pointr/getdisciplined

Mini habits
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00HGKNBDK?cache=32e9d3eac77
17384660ca9c7225c9c57&pi=AC_SX110_SY165_QL70&qid=1409569361&sr=8-1#ref=mp_s_a_1_1

This book really resonated with me. The gist is that people often fail because they choose too big. If you choose a smaller version of a habit that you are can garantee to be able to do on your worst day, you will start piling up the victories instead of failures.

He uses "one pushup" as an example. If your goal is one pushup per day, it's almost impossible to fail. Most of the time you will do far more once you get started but even on your worst day you can do one and have a win.

u/leeceia · 3 pointsr/AskMen

Of course. There was a book published about it. How well that's worked is dubious. It's definitely interesting though. To me personally? Bitch is what I grew up hearing thrown around in high school. It's not threatening at all. Cunt on the other hand... much more of a damaging insult to me. (N.B. Ain't got nothing against the word, just don't need to throw it around)

u/MapleSyrupHockey · 1 pointr/DecidingToBeBetter

Sorry for asking, but are you experiencing lots of stress? are you the highly neurotic type?
Before determining that you need willpower to control and suppress these actions I think it might help to find out why you are doing these things first. Find the root of cause, address them, and acknowledge them.

  1. Oversleep: ask yourself why you hate it, is it distracting your normal life? Are you shaming yourself? why are you furious of your sleep? are you not getting enough sleep?
  2. Biting finger: why are you doing it and when do you do it? I used to bite my finger when I was in high school but I was also in lots of stress back then. My way to combat that was to chew gum, apply finger nails, and always play with some fidgeting toys, but it really stops when I focus on something bigger than my stress (work, art, focusing on making my life better).

    Book wise I would recommend [The Confidence Gap]{https://www.amazon.com/Confidence-Gap-Guide-Overcoming-Self-Doubt/dp/1590309235/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1521352956&sr=8-1&keywords=the+confidence+gap} as this really brings me to a new perspective and changed how I do things in some ways.

    Edit: spelling
u/nopenothappening · 0 pointsr/explainlikeimfive

Oh but wait! It's so much more. "Negative reactions to 'cunt' resonate from a learned fear of ancient yet contemporary, inherent yet lost, reviled yet redemptive cuntpower." (From Cunt by Inga Muscio, p 7.)

Yes indeed there's a whole book on it! (Well, more accurately, there's a whole book inspired by it.) Cunt: A Declaration of Independence.

According to the book, "cunt" used to be a term of respect for women. Over the years, its definition changed (as definitions do). I think the main problem with "cunt," what makes it so powerful, is that it refers exclusively to women. That is, it makes an insult out of womanhood. More specifically, it demonizes women's sexuality. That is the major issue: women's sexuality.

From the book:
> The containment of woman’s sexuality was a huge priority to emerging patrifocal religious and economic systems. Cunts were anathema to forefather types. Literally and metaphorically, the word and anatomical jewel presided at the very nexus of many earlier religions which impeded phallic power worship. In Western civilization, forefather types practiced savior-centered religions, such as Catholicism. Springing forth from a very real, very fiscal fear of women and our power, eventually evolving into sexual retardation and womb envy, a philosophy and social system based on destruction was culled to thriving life.
> you