Reddit mentions of 31 Days to Masculinity: A Guide to Help Men Live Authentic Lives

OYS: Men of March Part Deux

Anyone else doing Men of March again? Last year u/thefamilyalpha gave us an incredible set of challenges. There was a list of don'ts and then a new list of do's every day.

> 1 You will not masturbate, edge, or touch your dick for pleasure during the entire month. You can have sex, but not with yourself.

On it. Last year this had a huge impact on me because I realized in order to get off I had to game my wife. This year it's not even an issue.

> 2 You will not watch porn, any sexy gifs, look at provocative photos or anything of the sort as this will lead to you breaking rule one.

Last year I went a step further. When browsing Instagram or whatever, instead of clicking on the hot girl photo I would click on the ripped dude photo to inspire me to "not focus on getting the girl, but on being the man". Around this time I started following r/progresspics - highly recommend this to everyone here.

> 3 You will do 100 pushups every day. Don’t give the ‘time’ excuse, or any excuse as I don’t give a fuck, just do them. Break it up however you have to, but before you sleep at night, 100 must be done; chest day or not. Maintain proper form to prevent injury.

He also added that this is in addition to your normal exercise routine. I'm somewhat overdeveloped in the chest, so instead I do 10 minutes of planks, usually in sets of 2, 2, 1.5, 1.5, 1, 1, 1. I do this every night before bed and I watch FailArmy videos to make myself laugh, it makes planking that much harder when you're laughing. Also associates good feelings with the pain.

> 4 You must start reading a book. Even if it’s just a few pages a day at first, you must be reading a book. During Men of March I read ‘New World Ronin’ by Victor Pride as well as ‘One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich’ by Alexander Solzhenitsyn. You don’t have to finish the book in the month, just actively read a few pages every day to build the habit. With that said, I finished two books by making the time (usually before bed) to read free from distraction.

The first thing I do each day is drink my coffee and read. Right now I'm reading a biography of Oliver Stone. I also have Meditations and Sex God Method loaded up on my Kindle for when I'm in a waiting room or in transit.

> 5 You have to start giving genuine answers to people. If someone asks if you’re busy don’t say, “No” when you are. You have to stop avoiding conflict at the expense of your true self. If your wife asks a question, give an answer. Responding with “I don’t know/care” is not an answer a leader gives to those whose lives are his responsibility. Start knowing, start caring, and start telling the world your true opinion.

This is my biggest struggle. I was raised to be independent, but I was raised by a badass, take-charge, single mom. So for too long I expected my wife to be a badass. My wife doesn't want to be a badass, she wants me to lead, she wants my opinions because she can't always trust her feelings. So I better have a opinion but that only comes from having a strong direction in life. Opinions without a valuable direction are stupid, arrogant and often hostile. A man with a mission will have an opinion and it's attractive. Yesterday a girl messaged me asking to come over for career advice. My wife came home to find me giving advice to a young woman. Huh...

> 6 If you have a vice, remove it. You have to be honest with yourself; if you’re overweight and drinking to numb the pain or are smoking pot and being unproductive, that shit has to go. This isn’t a ‘dry’ challenge, if alcohol or pot isn’t a problem good to go. If it’s more than that, leave it be for the month.

Last year I had a ton of vices: porn, video games, sugar, social media. None of those are causing problems in my life right now. Moderation is key. A year has changed a lot.

> 7 This is not a story book, it is a program designed to strip away the layers of fake, generic, and counterfeit behaviors and lies you’ve been living in order to discover who you truly are. Read one day at a time, do not skip ahead.

Again, I highly recommend buying this book. Unfuck your life one day at a time.

> 8 Every day there will be a challenge, you must complete it.

Great challenges last year that resonated with people were:

• Put together a budget of income and expenses, track all the shit. Do this with, or show it to, your wife.
  
  
• Toss out everything in your house that you don't use. Again, do this with you wife. Show her that you lead.
  
  
• Run for your life. Get up and run until you feel like you'll die, then run even further.
  

I see what you are staying and honestly I have not looked for specific books pertaining to men's mental health. I guess I just assumed they would be grunting tomes to traditional "suck it up" male outlooks and sadly a cursory search results in bullshit like this as the top result:

31 Days to Masculinity: A Guide to Help Men Live Authentic Lives https://www.amazon.com/dp/1546796053/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_Sa.DCbHXQ3HTE

What the fuck is an authentic life and who is this assholes to tell me what my masculinity should be. Ughhh. Sorry digression.

I will keep searching but men's lit is typically more of this garbage.

I guess I'm just a little jealous of the advanced perspectives shared in lit aimed at women. It just makes more sense to me.

I know this is a bit of a rambling, thank you very much for your reply.

Edit: something like this seems much more suited... https://express.google.com/u/0/product/8763870527485695515_3320832077735330034_7695788?utm_source=google_shopping&utm_medium=tu_prop&utm_content=eid-lsjeuxoeqt&gtim=CNae7-Hrrc3AHxDB5YzI4b_I_qkBGPCCyggiA1VTRCjgktDkBTCs29UD&utm_campaign=7695788&gclid=CjwKCAiAqt7jBRAcEiwAof2uK-MIvPrMV05Cjb6qwubxwdTYN1cmjtyjvp3fbZa86u-glKgvxHE1YRoCbbsQAvD_BwE