Reddit mentions of Combating Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best-selling Guide to Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults

The behavior you describe in your father sounds so much like the flipping between your Dad's authentic identity back into his cult/mormon identity.

You may have already heard of this, but Steve Hassan talks about the dual identity concept in this video, and gets into it in great detail in his book Combating Cult Mind Control.

Your Dad's indoctrinated phobias of falling from the church was probably triggered by his brief moment of clarity.

It's frustrating, but seeing your father's real personality come out is a really good sign. If you're inclined, check out Steve's books (Freedom of Mind is another fantastic resource) or his website https://freedomofmind.com/

Best of luck!

The point of /r/brexitblunders and /r/brexitbenefits is to provide a list that is as reliable and neutral as possible (if occasionally tongue-in-cheek) without the hyperbolic opinions attached; all comments do is divide and further entrench existing positions, particularly online.

The point is to provide resources that allow somebody to weigh up the pros and cons of either side which relies on as reputable sources as available. You can't talk somebody out of changing a position, you can only plant seeds and let people become exposed to more and more evidence that counters their view, from their own accord. It's literally cult deprogramming 101; there are serious books and they all say the same thing.

We are 100% serious about /r/Brexitbenefits being used for genuinely positive things... but there just aren't any.

Besides, who can be arsed modding comments all day?

I'm not quite certain how the discussion between /u/huntingme and /u/1exmobadass went (one of them may be able to answer); but, for my wife and I, we obtained the CES letter from /u/1exmobadass after a family meeting. My wife and I already has serious doubts (myself having been researching for a while, but only using LDS and FAIR material). The CES letter filled in all the gaps for me, and I was sold. My wife was in the same boat. Since then, we have not been able to get anyone else to read the CES letter in the family, sadly. Though, we have distributed it to those who have asked. We never get an honest response from someone after sending the CES letter. Lately, I have been reading Combating Cult Mind Control which suggests that showing a cult member their doctrine is false, first, is not the best idea. The first approach is to show the cult member they are being controlled. A good way to prove this is the BITE model. I am currently writing a paper on this, proving how TSCC uses BITE.

Has nothing to do with confirmation bias, has to do with research into what makes a cult, well, a cult.

First up, how would you describe a cult?

What are some common tactics cults exhibit? What would you look for in deciding whether or not something was a cult? Are there things that can make a group more or less cultish? Do any of these cult behaviors show up in the JW faith? All of these are researchable and answerable questions.

A pretty fair guideline to follow can be found in the BITE model created by a Cult expert Steven Hassan, or for a more in depth look into cults through his book Combating Cult Mind Control

Researching manipulative human behaviors, logical fallacies, history, etc... can also lead to comparisons to or identification of cult-like behaviors that help in determining whether or not something is a cult.

read Dr. Steven Hassan book ‘Combatting Cult Mind Control.’

has examples of other cults and how they operate.

edit: here it is.

A question you seriously need to ask her (and yourself) is if she is okay being in a mixed faith marriage. It is likely she is banking on you feeling the spirit eventually and getting baptized, and providing her the opportunity for a temple marriage.

Something I believe isn’t spoken about often enough on this forum is the concept of mind control, and the undue influence the church has on its members. If you seriously want to make things work with her, please look into the BITE model of mind control and/or read some of Steven Hassan’s books his updated version of his old book is great

This is the first post I’ve read of yours, but to be honest there are a LOT of red flags and alarm bells ringing right now.

If you are willing to speak with her bishop, ask if she is willing to read the information on LDS.org in the gospel topic essays. And further the CES letter

It’s likely that she is unable to objectively look at the truth claims of the church due to control over her mind. Maybe research the BITE model with her, get her to investigate it herself.

>The apostasy that brought about the need for the LDS restoration was seen as early as in the book of Revelation. The Catholic Church, with the help of the Roman Empire, did its best to organize the confusion, but a number of rural practices were mixed in to it and were the eventual source of the great reformers.

They are notoriously vague about the Great Apostasy. If it did indeed happen in the Early Church, ask them for dates. Mormons have told me that it happened after St John died. If that's so, then how can they trust the canon of the Bible, which was assembled after the Great Apostasy? If they say the early centuries, ask them which ones? Most of them have told that they will get back to me about that, and then never return to my house again.

For a great, in-depth look at the so-called Great Apostasy (and this is good for refuting not only Mormons, but also the many Protestants who hold this ahistorical idea), read The Apostasy That Wasn't: The Extraordinary Story of the Unbreakable Early Church.

Ultimately, you may not have much luck with them on this. Catholics and Mormons do not even agree on basic vocabulary. When they say God, they mean someone who used to be a man and became God. When they say Jesus, they believe that he is subordinate to God. It goes on and on. You may have better luck with this. I've used techniques in that book with Jehovah's Witnesses and seen differences in the way that they interact with me.

For the Mormons and JWs, apologetics is only good for your edification. It doesn't really work the other way.

what your explaining about your ex is undue influence.

even though she’s been out of the cult for long time, this influence can still effect a person.

i recommend you read steven hassan’s book ‘combating cult mind control.’

Combating Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best-selling Guide to Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults https://www.amazon.com/dp/0967068827/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_lUQPBbNXCHJBN

there’s a audio version too.

someone raised in a cult gets effected in a way that keeps the member in a prolong child like manner. cult members are kept in a parent (the cult) child (member) relationship. children continue to need there parent(s) to tell them what to do in many aspects of their life, weather small or large decisions. it can depend on the person.

it’s possible that her parents got to her and had her take her child from you. that speculation though.

either way, you need to learn more of this topic to better understand.

also, your ex needs to see a physiologist that has experience dealing with cults.

I can't recommend this book enough.
https://www.amazon.com/Combating-Cult-Mind-Control-Best-selling/dp/0967068827/

Get this.

Combating Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best-selling Guide to Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults https://www.amazon.com/dp/0967068827/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_7u7vCbA5CH25D

Buy it and read it. You’ll thank me later.

I'm sorry you're going through this. Your wife sounds awful.

I don't know if this is helpful, but I used to be Mormon. The Mormon church teaches its members all kinds of mental gymnastics to stop them from questioning the church and keep them in line. This book helped me recognize and deal with those ingrained emotion/thought control patterns while I transitioned out of the church.

I recommend it because it sounds like your wife is no longer willing to listen to reason and will simply say whatever it takes to defend her new, totally irrational beliefs. It doesn't sound like she'd be willing to read it, but it might help you deal with her. I think the author has other books more geared towards friends/relatives of cult members, too.

Best of luck.

Before you join any group, I recommend reading Steve Hassan's Combating Cult Mind Control.

You seem strongly logic-driven, so what I think might be most helpful to you would be to read "Combating Cult Mind Control" by Steven Hassan. It points out the techniques which cults use to indoctrinate and narrow the thinking of their followers. There are undoubtedly other books or sources which would be great for that purpose, anecdotally it's the one which really helped me. Once you can see the structure of the approach used by groups to narrow your thinking and conform to their ideas, then go out of your way to research opposing claims. Be on the look-out for cognitive dissonance in yourself. Beyond TRP, it's an approach that will help you to not mistake validation with logical thinking.

You need to read this: Combating Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best-selling Guide to Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults https://www.amazon.com/dp/0967068827/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_dw1VCbMWA55AZ

I highly recommend educating yourself before delving into this territory. Brainwashing isn't what you think it is. This is an excellent book. Highly worth reading in it's entirety before you confront your wife

Combating Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best-selling Guide to Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults https://www.amazon.com/dp/0967068827/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_OKqwDb7CD69GR

https://www.amazon.com/Combating-Cult-Mind-Control-Best-selling/dp/0967068827

https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended-ebook/dp/B014DUR7L2

> Besides even if she knew TTATT she'd just have a host of new stresses to deal with, ones I know only too well.

I understand where you are coming from but this is the equivalent of treating your adult wife like a child. She deserves to know the truth. Only when we have the most reliable information are we equipped to make the most informed decisions.

Change your tactics. Try the Socratic method by asking her the type of questions that make her think. I know it's overwhelmingly difficult but you need to resist the urge to just bombard her with facts/information. Her JW indoctrination is a sophisticated piece of software. You have to use finesse here instead of a direct approach.

I recommend you read some of this if you haven't already. I fucked up badly when I woke up and immediately tried to wake up my family. Wish I had read that book first.

Have you read:

Combating Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best-selling Guide to Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults https://www.amazon.com/dp/0967068827/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_Q7x3Cb5J9XAB1

I bought this the other day:


Combating Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best-selling Guide to Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from Destructive Cults https://www.amazon.com/dp/0967068827/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_GluIDbMCVH2N1

I am so sorry that this is happening to you. You are right to be concerned - this could very easily tear your family apart. I have seen it happen firsthand when someone in my family was recruited into the Dubs then became totally alienated from her non-Dub husband. You could very easily end up in a situation where both your wife and your child are brainwashed into thinking you are a bad influence and that only other Dubs are worth spending time with. You definitely do not want to be complacent about this. The JWs are not "just another religion". It is a very dangerous and nasty cult.

My advice would be to immediately start "studying" the JWs yourself - but NOT with their own material. JWs don't know their own history very well at all, but you can find a lot of eye opening stuff using outside materials like http://www.jwfacts.com

Here are the three books that I would strongly recommend you purchase and start reading right away:

The Reluctant Apostate: Leaving the Jehovah's Witnesses (a very long and well-researched explanation of the JWs - if you can only read one of these books, I would make it this one)

Combating Cult Mind Control (not focused on just the JWs, but a general book about how cults operate and how to try to work with someone to get them out)

Crisis of Conscience (an older book written by one of the "Governing Body" members that ended up leaving the religion)

If you read those books, you will learn a LOT about how the JWs operate and have ample proof that this is not a legitimate religion. However, you can't confront her directly with this info. She has been programmed by the cult to reject any direct attack on the religion.
However, as you read them, you will probably think of some questions that you'll have for your wife about the Dubs. Start asking her questions NOT in an aggressive way but just in a "curious" sort of way. For example, "What do you make of [this thing]? What is the JW explanation for that?"

When people are being brainwashed, you can't confront them directly about it. That just makes them dig their heels in. You have to slowly dismantle the belief system by asking them questions and forcing them to realize for themselves that the cult doesn't have a good answer for it.

I also recommend trying your best to find excuses to spend time away from home on meeting days to keep her away from the dubs as much as possible. Time spent away from the indoctrination sessions can often help people realize on their own that it is bullshit.