Reddit mentions of Marriage, a History: How Love Conquered Marriage

No if we are looking at the long term, these kinds of values come into play when property ownership is relevant. When wealth comes from how much you own people want to make sure that their genetics are the ones that benefit. Since it is easy to determine the birth mother controlling women's sexual agency in terms of religion and morality in order to ensure the correct lineage. Pre-agrarian (and even some more communial agrarian) societies didn't have these concerns, so sexuality was not policed in the same way. Children were seen as adding to the whole family, which was basically the community at large.

Men could have all the sex for pleasure they wanted because it was less relevant to the economic situations. Courtisans and harems existed for men at the very top of the food chain and were completely acceptable by everyone in the court system.

I hate to say this but there has been a ton of research on this, including basic histories of certain cultures that says the exact opposite of what you are saying. How we view sex, marriage and family has changed drastically depending on the time and culture you exist in.

Marriage: A History is a very readable overview of how the institution has changed over time: http://www.amazon.com/Marriage-History-How-Love-Conquered-ebook/dp/B002I1XRZY/ref=dp_kinw_strp_1

And I have heard very good things about Sex at Dawn, which talk about a lot of the arguments you are making: http://www.amazon.com/Sex-Dawn-Stray-Modern-Relationships/dp/0061707813

Here's what I'm doing:

• Board game night at local game shop
  
• Meetups
  
• Therapy (probably has made the most difference in my social skills, but the least in my relationships. I expect a big payoff when I finally do start to date, though)
  
  
• Books. I would recommend finding some books on relationships written by credible sources. Find something that has a score of 4 or 5 stars on Amazon, is written by someone with a Ph.D and has more than 30 pages of endnotes. It's probably not written by a looney. If you find a good one, let us know!
  
• My book list: Loneliness (about the condition of loneliness, not relationships, but good nonetheless), The 5 Love Languages (not written by an expert, but decent for starting a conversation with someone about a relationship that you are looking to improve), and I'm about to start Marriage, A History, which is about the tradition of marriage and how love matches became the dominant factor in marriage.
  
  Things that I have tried that do not work:
  
  
• Religious studies groups (be fair, I joined it for casual friendships, and that's what I got out of it)
  
• Gym (I don't have the energy to get out to a gym, but I can exercise indoors)
  
• Ballroom Dance classes (you'll have fun dancing, but no one will follow you out of the class. I think it's true for other types of dance as well)