Reddit mentions of The Garden of Vegan: How It All Vegan Again!

Look, I'm a total atheist (obviously) (DAE Dawkins lolol) but there's literally proof in the bible that blow jobs are like the most vegan and sacred thing ever.

So, it's pretty obvious that Adam and Eve were vegans, right? They had all the vegan food they could possibly want in the garden of Eden. It wasn't called the "deli of Eden" was it?

Anyway, they were all happy and getting along with all the animals and running around naked giving each other Divine Vegan Oral Sex (because God was all like "You can eat everything you see here.")

But then Satan came along in the form of an evil snake {obvious phallic symbolism}. See, just like in today's memes, Satan likes to use snakes to confuse vegans into making hypocrites (sinners) of themselves so they'll get kicked out of the garden of Eden (veganism). {Paradoxically, his lesser-known "good" twin, Seitan, is a vegan activist who has done more for the vegan cause than even Saint Ingrid of Newkirk.}

So Eve was tricked because she thought she was talking to a big dick, and that's vegan, but it was actually a snake, which was actually Satan. And he was all like "OOoh, come on baby, eat that apple, eat that apple real good...ooh yeah, that's it...oh, it's so juicy and hard and ripe...yeah...unghhh...." and she was used to both apples and blowjobs being totes vegan so she was all over it and did things to that apple that I can't even mention here.

But, as was revealed later in the bible (Showerthoughts 18:4) some people do not know that blowjobs are vegan. This kind of ignorance is a sin. It's actually a cardinal sin and anyone who asks the question "Are blowjobs vegan?" is supposed to be struck down by lightening and their body eaten by locusts. But I digress.

So, you can see how literally the worst thing that ever happened to humans was when they got kicked out of the garden of Vegan and became ex-vegans, miserable creatures destined to wander aimlessly on the earth ranting and raving a bunch of incoherent nonsense. And ever since then, Satan-Penis-Snake has been trying to trick the remaining vegans into losing their divine and perfect state of vegan-ness. So don't fall for it!

I've always been a big fan of the Garden of Vegan series.

They have great recipes, and then fun arts and crafts at the end.

The Garden of Vegan: How It All Vegan Again! https://www.amazon.com/dp/1551521288/ref=cm_sw_r_other_awd_ZoF6wbST11X1W

There is also How It All Vegan, and La Dolce Vegan (and probably more, but those are the three I own.)