Reddit mentions of The Gift of Sex: A Guide to Sexual Fulfillment

You might check out The Gift of Sex. It's written by a husband and wife couple who both came from pretty repressive backgrounds...I remember laughing pretty hard when they talk about that being their big rebellion when they got married, that they were going to try EVERYTHING. Sounds like a good one to me!

They are a clinical therapist and nurse respectively, and have a couple of chapters that specifically address some of your issues. The problems of growing up with a view of it being dirty, and some practical steps to become more comfortable with your own body. They also have a chapter or two devoted to women who are non orgasmic. It might be a good read for you regardless of what your faith upbringing was, it can be helpful hearing from people who have sympathetic experiences.