(Part 2) Best products from r/GenderCritical

I'm glad I'm vegan long enough now that I don't even really realize it anymore and don't feel the need to frequent any online vegan spaces. Like any place for any group online there's a lot of stupidity and of course plenty of misogyny.

Vegan spaces I'd put on par with libfem ones for the degree of misogyny that is celebrated. Lots of nudity, lots of imagery of violence. Libfems pretend it's 'for female empowerment'; vegans pretend it's 'for the animals'. Either way it's the same ol' standard rank and file 21st century western misogyny at play. Don't people ever get sick of not thinking for themselves? Not creating anything themselves? It's all so boring and uninspired. I realize that's like the least pressing issue about all of it, but sometimes I just wonder, don't people at least tire of that aspect?

Kind of off topic now but for practical purposes honestly I don't even seek out vegan websites (or subreddits) for recipes anymore. Either figure out my own these days, like the lentil bolognese I made last night (amaaazing), or far better resources are simply picking up non-'western' cookbooks. My latest acquisitions are Samarkand and Taste of Persia. So many amazing, exciting, fresh, flavorful vegetable based recipes that have stood the test of time, that you know are good cause all these countries full of non-vegans are eating them. Next on the wishlist is probably The Malaysian Kitchen, and old favorites are Lebanese Home Cooking and Middle Eastern Vegetarian Cookbook. Sorry I know OT, but I just love cookbooks. What's the word for the cookbook-obsessed? Like foodie, but... cookbookie?

But anyway for fucks sake come on. I assumed most vegans would feel the same as I which is jesus christ people drink some damn almond/soy/oat/rice/bean/flax/whatever milk. I can understand wanting a meat substitute since it is pretty inimitable, but milk? It's just creamy white stuff with some fat protein and sugars. Not hard to imitate, and frankly the plant based versions are superior anyway. I would challenge anyone to stop eating dairy for a year or two, then tell me it doesn't smell rancid and sweaty. You get desensitized to it when you consume it regularly but give yourself a break from it and your nose will pick up on those things big time. But bottom line it's just not necessary. It's the most frivolous, weird, and frankly disgusting part of non-vegan eating. I would think that would be the message (ok probably in more marketable inviting terms), not "well let's just have human women do it". ??? Ultimate facepalm.

Like others have said you can get drug tests for relatively cheap. Amazon has them, I've bought the THC ones before but I'm sure you can get ones to test other drugs.

Edit: here's a 12 panel on amazon https://smile.amazon.com/Pack-Identify-Diagnostics-Panel-Drug/dp/B01DMMPO58/ref=sr_1_4?keywords=panel+drug+test&qid=1573282428&sr=8-4

Edit Edit: It is also important to know that water soluble drugs like opiates leave the system in a few days whereas fat soluble drugs like marijuana can stay in the system >30 days. In case you ever test positive for something look up its solubility.

Usually these rapists use Rohypnol or GHB. The tests for these are obscure and I've never heard of it in a employment/student screen. I've never even heard of an ER testing for them and I've seen suspected cases before. OH how I wish the average ER could test for them. Generally only very specialized labs can test for it. That said rohypnol doesn't usually show up because such small doses are used and it dissipates so quickly. GHB is not usually detectable after 12hrs.


It may go without saying but never let someone buy you a drink you don't see made from a community bottle by the bartender and watch them prepare it. Don't let the buyer handle it, it takes minimal slight of hand to spike. I don't part with a cup in public except to leave it with a trusted friend. Otherwise a cup I leave alone is a cup I'm done with, full or not. I'd buy a new drink after every sip before I risk a drink being tampered with.

Please go report this to the bar manager and file a police report. Give both of them a description. Bartenders are usually told to keep a lookout and the police will keep a record of the incident which could help future cases.

You'll learn all about this stuff in med school. Stay safe and good luck. <3

Hiya! Saw your comment and had to mention a book to you. Actually, the poster above me mentioned the method taught: FAM. The book is "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" and it is amazing. It's not just about the fertility awareness method, it also will teach you so much about the hows and whys and what's going on with your body. Here is a link to the webpage the author of TCOYF runs. Just read some of the FAQs! It's an awesome resource.

Anyway. Women react to different types of birth control methods in different ways. What's awesome for one person can be terrible for another. If someone is forgetful or wouldn't consistently follow the FAM rules, it will not be an effective method. A copper IUD (Intra-uterine device) is another non-hormonal option and again, some people love it some hate it. There's Mirena, a hormonal IUD. There's Nuvaring, hormonal ring. There's Implanon, lots love it and lots hate it. Depo-Provera is an injection good for three months, I know women who swear by it and others who hate it so very very much. Then there are bc pills. These vary from if they will have a combination of hormones or just one, some try to imitate a cycle and you'll see four colors in a pack (the three that month, plus placebos). Then there's the how of taking it. Continuously? Skip placebo?

So even though this is getting long, going to throw in some personal experience. I started taking the pill at 19. Tried 5 different ones over the 9 last years, not counting each time it was auto-switched to generic. They were effective and did what they were supposed to. About 3 years ago I switched to Generess Fe, then took it continuously meaning no periods! That lasted about three months, then switch to generic, then got my period the day after starting the generic. Anyway, it went away, I stayed on it and for the next year took it with no placeboes (is there an e? or not? damn) so no periods. For funsies, the pharmacy switched to the other generic! Period. But, no period since then. It also dampened my emotions (to the point of just about nothing mattering), gave me racing thoughts unless my brain felt full of fog, stifled my sex drive and left me always feeling confused.

So... like 23 days ago, I finished the last pack and stopped it all because after looking at the side effects I realized I was never nauseous like I'd been for the last six months of 2018 and that before taking any bc I had only thrown up a few times when very sick as a kid. I hadn't gone more than two weeks without vomiting for 9 years. Now I haven't thrown up once since I stopped taking it. The reason for starting it was my neurologist would not even talk about my epilepsy meds @ the time unless I agreed to go on HBC and take folic acid (folate is what ya want, btw) because I was having sex w/ condoms. She somehow managed to spend a solid 45 minutes telling me every brutal birth defect while leaving out that the medication I was on (Trileptal) lowers the effectiveness of HBC while never looking to adjust or change my medications because the possibility of a baby was the most important thing. It worked out being on it while I was because for a bit there were lots of med changes and a pregnancy would not have been good.

All of this is to say - look into everything! Like, everything. Depo for instance, if you got a shot then stopped getting them, could mean waiting for 6-12 months for your period. I haven't gotten mine yet and I was taking the pill. Which just makes life a bit unpredictable. It does actually mess with your hormones and has side effects, not in an eternal way but your body has to figure out what was happening and adjust.

My completely unsolicited and late night advice is that first, get a copy of "Taking Charge of Your Fertility". You can learn a lot about your cycle and your body and knowledge is freedom and all. Look into the different types of birth control. If I were you I'd start with a pill or ring because it's much easier to stop and IME most women try at least a couple of types. With depo, they can try to add more hormones if you bleed for 6 weeks, or say wait for it to get better but they can't remove the hormones. Then visit your OBGYN and get a script if that's your choice. Then, even though they'll ask about your current meds and don't mention how something might affect birth control - read the really boring label, run anything - including OTC herbs and such - through a drug interaction search. For instance, St. John's Wort lowers the effectiveness of birth control. The second anti-epileptic I was on was made less effective by my birth control and the dose had to be adjusted throughout the month.

Look at all of it and keep learning more. Whatever you choose just make sure the positives outweigh the negatives for you. Don't think you HAVE to stick with a medication or method that you don't want to.

Sorry about this being so long and rambling. Best wishes and I'm glad you feel more comfortable exploring all options for your health.

oh, you can check out /birthcontrol for advice btw.

eta: So, because hormonal birth control can be used to control symptoms of PCOS or endo, just wanted to say this. It's not a cure. For a lot of people, it means they'll be able to live a life with much less pain while on HBC. HBC is just pretty much the solution that will be offered if you're in a lot of pain, have abnormal periods, etc. It's a band-aid and an excuse to not find a solution because obviously, as women, our health isn't important. That last sentence is more about pharama companies and the narrative of our bodies being a magical mystery science can't understand than doctors doing what they can to help. The end point is that when you go off of HBC at some point, if it's before menopause, those symptoms from before will return. If your periods were like clockwork and light on BC but before lasted two weeks in crippling pain, the most likely result is having to try to find a solution to a problem that should have been addressed before masking it.

Irigaray did some work on mythological and religious representations of mother-daughter relationships. From the Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy:

>According to Irigaray, while it is necessary to alter cultural norms, it is equally as important to address the problematic nature of individual relationships between women-especially the mother/daughter relationship. To emphasize how mother/daughter relationships are sundered in contemporary Western culture, Irigaray turns to Greek mythology. For example, she discusses the myth of Demeter, the goddess of the earth (agriculture), and her daughter Persephone. In the myth, Zeus, Persephone's father, aids his brother Hades, king of the underworld, to abduct the young Perspephone. Hades has fallen in love with Persephone and wants her to be queen of the underworld. When Demeter learns that her daughter is missing, she is devastated and abandons her role as goddess of the earth. The earth becomes barren. To reestablish harmony in the world, Zeus needs Demeter to return to her divine responsibilities. Zeus orders Hades to return Persephone. However, Persephone is tricked into eating a pomegranate seed that binds her to Hades forever. Under the persuasion of Zeus, Hades agrees to release Persephone from the underworld for half of each year. Irigaray reads this myth as an example of both a positive mother/daughter relationship, and the success of men at breaking it apart. Demeter and Persephone love each other and Demeter strives to protect her daughter. However, in this myth they are ultimately at the mercy of the more powerful males. The myth is also an example of men exchanging women as if they were commodities. Zeus conspires with his brother and, in effect, gives his daughter away without consulting either Persephone or Demeter. Irigaray believes that myths tell us something about the deterioration of the mother/daughter relationship and the manner in which men have traditionally controlled the fate of women-whether they are wives, daughters, sisters, or mothers. Irigaray utilizes myth to suggest that mothers and daughters need to protect their relationships and strengthen their bonds to one another.

>The need to alter the mother/daughter relationship is a constant theme in Irigaray's work. While she believes that women's social and political situation has to be addressed on a global level, she also thinks that change begins in individual relationships between women. Thus she stresses the need for mothers to represent themselves differently to their daughters, and to emphasize their daughter's subjectivity. For example, in je, tu, nous, Irigaray offers suggestions for developing mother-daughter relationships such as displaying images of the mother-daughter couple, or consciously emphasizing that the daughter and the mother are both subjects in their own right.

I remember reading Irigaray on encountering a representation of Mary and her mother Anne, and lamenting how rare such representations (Mother-Daughter) are compared to representations of Mary and Christ (Mother-Son). Here's the image as well as some analysis of her religious work.

As an elementary school teacher, I really value Fearless Girls, Wise Women & Beloved Sisters: Heroines in Folktales from Around the World as a resource for legends and myths that feature female protagonists.

I’m one of those gender nonconforming women who doesn’t see the point of doing emotional and intellectual labor for other people. I am not here to hold your hand but you asked nicely so I will provide you with a high-quality resource with which you may educate yourself.
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Read this fantastic book and you will understand why everyone, male and female, should give very little credit to medical practitioners claiming absolute authority.

“For Her Own Good: Two Centuries of the Experts Advice to Women”
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https://www.amazon.com/Her-Own-Good-Centuries-Experts/dp/1400078008

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I will finish with a joke that doctors tell (i’ve spent a lot of time working closely with MDs).
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On the first day of medical school, the incoming class of eager incoming students get a lecture from the Dean. “Welcome to medical school,” he says. “We are so glad you’re here. However I must inform you of the following: only half of what we are going to spend the next four years teaching is actually correct. Unfortunately we don’t know which half.”

At that point the doctor laughs heartily.
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Still feel like believing everything doctors say?

If she is between five and eight/nine maybe, Monster Allergy from Disney Italy is a fun comic.

Also W.i.t.c.h from Disney Italy are great, about Will, Irma, Taranee, Cornelia, Hai Lin. Link to Amazon Take care to buy the original comics and not the spin off comic or the paperback novels. From five to twenty, I think, but the main characters are teens.

Moomin by Tove Jansson varies a bit in quality (books are best, the comics are made by her brother, but some are nice). Valhalla by Madsen is about the Scandinavian gods (not exactly feminist, but she learns something). I also read Ranma 1/2 by Takahashi for my daughter, but it contains a really creepy man stealing women's underwear and trying to touch girls. I was a bit relaxed with what I read for her, I just read a lot and we talked about it, so I just presumed she would understand after a while. Marguerite Abouet has made some new comics about a little girl that I haven't read (the books about Aya are for teenagers / adults – about sex and infidelity, although no explicit scenes I think).

Tove Jansson lived with a woman for most of her life. Too Ticki is based on her girlfriend. I think that in the cartoons/moving pictures (just to be certain I get the terms right) Too Ticki is made to be a man, which is silly. There is also an hemul who always wears dresses. Who is a man. Nobody ever question his manliness.

I hope there are more good and fun books for girls now. In Norway now there seems to be some idea that they shall make the books easy to understand, so children's books have become just stupid.

First, here is a map of which states are most interested in incest porn. Arkansas, Kentucky and West Virginia don't surprise me, but Kansas and Alaska does surprise me. My wife from Alaska says it's because there are so many small towns that people don't have many options in partners, so then they think "hmmm, how about my cousin? They are looking good."

But on the further point of incest. I find it fascinating as a society when we try and create moral norms without agreeing to a guiding ethos that we all follow. Right now we are moving towards the "consenting adult" standard. If consenting adults want to do it, then why not? That is often the prevailing sentiment among liberals. Since we don't all share a holy book or something that lays out a moral code, then we have to grapple with our basic ideas of what is morally acceptable. For many of us incest will always be unthinkable. I have a cousin my age and I couldn't begin to imagine a relationship, even though first cousin marriage was not only acceptable but in many cultures encouraged to maintain family wealth. For me it is as taboo as eating a dead pet.

It is a fascinating discussion to be had, because there are so many diverse ideas on what should or shouldn't be accepted. There is a fascinating book that deals with this called The Righteous Mind. A Ted talk of his introduces these ideas and how they influence us.

I loved this book and think you might enjoy it too. I'm not advertising or any thing. LOL Elsa I Come With My Songs: Elsa Gidlow I wish I could have been a lesbian. I tried, but the libido was not in it. At this point in my life I am almost male free, except for a close male relative. I truly wish I had gone that route when I was younger. It's very freeing.

Well said, it's all very true. Choice feminism / liberal feminism / third wave feminism is basically just a wolf in sheep's clothes. It isn't actually feminism at all, in fact, I believe it's just a backlash that is extremely effective as it cleverly and deliberately coopts the language of second wave / actual feminism.

One recent example is this nauseating thread on r/Documentaries about Hot Girls Wanted. (Please do not vote, comment or otherwise participate in the linked thread or do anything that could be considered brigading). All of the misogynistic males were defending their consuming porn that clearly harms women by appealing to "agency" "choice" and " empowerment". Cooption is really the best way to suppress any movement. If you can convince women that slavery is indeed freedom, then why would they ever petition for freedom? It's downright Orwellian, really. It's truly so obvious a tactic, it's a bit surprising that so many women have fallen for it but that's the way it is.

There's a good book about the failures of choice feminism called The Freedom Fallacy

There's also this wonderful article in the Onion that predicted the sorry fucking state of "liberal feminism" today.

You can love someone and still decide that dating him is not healthy for you.

That is what got me to turn my life around when I was in an abusive relationship. I didn't understand at first that you can leave someone you're still in love with. You can though. You can put logic over your emotions and loyalty to him, and decide to stay away. It literally must be done hour by hour at first, just like an addiction. Encourage her to decide if the relationship is good for her (not the man). If it's not, she can decide to love him but stop dating him. Tell her she can show him love as a friend after some time apart.

EDIT: Also buy her this book: https://smile.amazon.com/Little-Black-Book-Big-Flags-ebook/dp/B005307MMQ/ref=sr_1_7?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1549586854&sr=1-7&keywords=Red+flags

Seeing his behavior in black and white can really help.

-This is just traditional advice, but it says a lot about whether a man respects women: pay attention to how he treats his mother. Does he respect her? Does he look up to her? Those are some good signs. EDIT: y'all I did not mean for this to come across like I think it applies in every case. I don't even know about most cases. But based on my own experience, I think it's a good thing to pay attention to.

-How does he talk about his ex girlfriends? Are they all ~crazy~ or ~bitches~ in his mind? RED FLAG

-If a man says he's a feminist, know that this doesn't mean anything. Wait until he shows that he's feminist in his actions. I once dated an incredibly abusive guy who stalked me after we broke up, but often claimed to be "the most feminist guy he knew" LOL

-Ask him his opinion about feminist issues that are close to you. What does he think about the wage gap? Prostitution? Pornography?(I think it's very hard to find men who aren't flat-out addicted to porn which takes a toll on a relationship, especially if you're anti-porn.) It's not a deal-breaker if he doesn't agree with you 100%, but it's probably a red flag if you find that it's hard to have a rational conversation.

-Finally, I recommend that all straight women read stuff on "pick-up culture" and "game" to identify when men are trying to manipulate you. Reading some of the how-to-manuals for douche-bags can help you identify them. The whole culture is pretty misogynistic. Here's one example: https://www.amazon.com/Game-Penetrating-Secret-Society-Artists/dp/0060554738

hahahah dude, getting a good salary for hard work is the opposite of dystopia! there is a nazi dystopia where women are penned and bred

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https://www.amazon.com/Swastika-Night-Katharine-Burdekin/dp/0935312560/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1542233447&sr=8-1&keywords=swastika+night

Freedom Fallacy: The Limits of Liberal Feminism is an anthology that came out last year.

Paid For: My Journey through Prostitution by Rachel Moran is a memoir plus radical feminist analysis of the sex industry. This book came out in the US but was also published a few years before.

Misogyny Reloaded by Abigail Bray came out in 2014.