(Part 3) Best products from r/autism

Hi!

>A bit disjointed, no direction, I just have to let some out.

This has happened to all of us. It will change.

> Our first indication of something needing addressed was the fact that he wasn't talking. When I express this to people close to us, they seemed to think oh he must be using baby talk or can say momma and dadda. Nope. None of that. Not even assigning nonsense words that we could decipher. I personally did not think this was a big deal, I didn't start talking until 3. However, tons of people around me told me to talk to our PCP and get him speech therapy. Ok, what could it hurt?

> Our PCP informed us that she was going to set up an evaluation. I assumed a basic inventory of his health and hearing, blood tests, etc. What I did not expect was a full battery of experts. The day lasted nearly 6 hours. 5 different experts, MDs and PhDs, and many other initialed experts among them. I was pretty impressed with their demeanor, much of the time was spent "playing" and observing. Questions and directions. I did not realize from what looked to be pretty simple process how much info was gained and being interpreted.

> The indicators. At first, it seemed ridiculous. I'm certain based on my son's demeanor they had arrived at their conclusion before much evidence was present. Examples, when playing with cars, the minute he rolled a wheel, they asked us if he does this often or with other objects. Nope. Just loves rolling cars about-like a normal kid! They informed me that he did not like stacking blocks-he preferred lining them up. Ok.... He stacks them all the time at home. Last doc we visited with seemed especially keen on his habits, noting he only chose the cars, ignoring everything else. Asked us if he flaps, nope. Upon wrapping up, he gathered the cars (very gently, not in a mean way) and of course our son gets mad. "That's flapping!" An immediate reaction, I was surprised this wasn't "normal" for a two-year-old? Doc said it with such authority I didn't question it.

Your evaluation was performed in the best possible way. Our twins were evaluated along that procedure (ADOS-2 probably). Since your kid doesn't talk yet probably you will need a second evaluation in the future. Our ST made us wait before evaluating our kids (like or pediatrician, he also suspected at least one of them had ASD). His approach was to produce a communication channel before the evaluation to have a better assessment. After the long evaluation, kids were diagnosed with 18 and 22 on the ADOS scale. This put them above the Asperger range, but at a mostly functional range. Our neurologist (the head of the evaluation team) told us that this evaluation was their last. No further evaluation was needed.

> On the drive home, my emotions ranged. First, these guys don't know my boy. It seemed like they made a big deal about everything. How could they have gathered enough info to make such a huge diagnosis???

Because they are trained, they know where to look. The other positive point is your boy is very young so all the symptoms are there to catch and no bias because of age is present. So it is easier to pinpoint the level, and produce a set of 'countermeasures' through early intervention to make him feel better about the world and himself.

> Eventually, I realized, I do know my boy. I know him deeply. He reminds me of myself. Him playing with little pieces of carpet in a room full of toys, me sitting down in the outfield playing with grass instead of playing T-ball. Intent on his particular toys, as I was with my Legos. In his own world. Throwing the blankets off at night, perhaps this is a skin sensitivity? Banging random objects, is that stimming? This and more, many more little signs...they add up.

You know a part of him, but being autistic there is another part that is hidden behind a veil and you can't access to it and he cannot explain to you that yet. One book (recommended here) that I found quite enlighten is The Reason I Jump: The Inner Voice of a Thirteen-Year-Old Boy with Autism. You can read it in an hour.

Also, I also told the psychologist interviewing my wife and I that my kids remind me of myself as I shared some traits with them. She told me, they were the ones being evaluated and whatever similarity was not relevant to them. Thus, don't overcomplicate yourself, try to build from your shared traits upwards to guide him into a fulfilling life.

> And I well up. I love my boy. He isn't a set of signs or indicators. How do they have the temerity to think they can assign labels or know what he is? I know WHO he is. And I worry. About programs that aim to "normalize" him. About teachers who may not give him the benefit of the doubt or the opportunity to excel. I worry that a diagnosis may hold him back and instead of building him up they'll remove his essence. Family who sees him differently.

Acceptance will come, but this doesn't mean you won't demand them to excel. Yet, you need to know his boundaries and be very aware of his strength. I wrote a lot about my kids here. Every kid is different, so you have to look for yourself.

Our twins are 4 y/o now. They started ST at 2.5, then moved to an inclusive school (50%ASD-50%NT) with ST, OT and PECS oriented classroom. This environment has helped a lot to develop their spoken language, feel more comfortable around people, and communicate their needs. You NEED every therapy available NOW.

Our neurologist told us the following: "if you do nothing now, they can go to a regular school without problems. They will adapt, but you won't have the best version of themselves. If you support them in every possible way, go to [this type of school] then you will drive your kids to become the best they want to be.

But for you, doing this will be the hardest five years of your life. So, you need psychological support and live a healthier life. You need to be there, every hour for your kid now."

So we took the second option.

Our kids, can speak now (not with the fluidity of a 4 y/o) and communicate most of their needs. Their tantrums and quirks are mostly contained (they appear when they are really tired or anxious). They are very clever kids, that love numbers, words, and music.

They excel at numbers: count from 1 to 30 (understand the symbols and their relation to quantities) in Spanish (mother language) and English. They can do basic sums (without finger counting) and now they are learning subtraction. They also have a strong interest in words: know the full ABC (some letters from the English pronunciation), read some words, understand words in English (colors and shapes; also many animals), and now they are learning to construct words from syllable.

We are using iPads to strengthen these areas. I bought them Tiggly when they were very young (two years ago) and this fourth birthday (yesterday) they received Osmo's Genius Kit. They loved the Tangram because puzzle-solving is one thing they love to do a lot (and this is in another level).

> I don't know the future. I only know that we will exercise agency in every decision along the way. We will advocate for rights and opportunity. We will be better than our parents. He will not be called "doofus" or "f-ggot." I'll hug the sht out of him but never hit him. He's our boy dammit, I love him, and that's all that matters.

Nobody knows​ the future, even us 'normal' people.

What you feel about parenthood is what I felt, even before knowing they had ASD. The thing you mention may even happen to a regular kid with special interest, whether has ASD or not. In our special case, we need to learn about ASD to approach to learning in the best possible way for the mind of our sons.

Be patient, It will be better.

EDIT: grammar.

Don't worry - it gets much, much more complex and comprehensive!

Skinner's Verbal Behavior was a response to the prevailing idea that language can be explained as an innate ability; that it is instead learned in the same way that other behavior is learned and is sensitive to reinforcement and punishment - same as other behavior. Skinner classified different verbal operants - mands are somewhat synonymous with "requests" and are controlled by an antecedent state of deprivation or satiation and reinforced by the specific consequence of what's being requested (for example, I'm thirsty and I prefer milk...I ask for milk, I get milk. Not thirsty? Not gonna ask for milk or any other fluid, probably.) Tacts are basically synonymous with expressive labels, they are controlled by a nonverbal stimulus (sight of a cat, smell of cookies, feeling your stomach rumble, etc.) and reinforced with generalized conditioned reinforcers...typically praise or some other kind of attention which may lead to other reinforcers... ("that's right" or the continuation of a conversation, "yeah, I'm hungry too, wanna get something to eat?") There are many other kinds of verbal operants, too. Skinner's Verbal Behavior is an amazing resource, but it's incredibly hard to get through. I like this book as a practitioner's/laymen's guide and it's pretty cheap:

http://www.amazon.com/Teaching-Language-Children-Developmental-Disabilities/dp/0981835651

Language is super complex and Skinner's account doesn't cover everything, you can also check out relational frame theory and derived relations, which cover higher-level, more complex verbal behavior.

I have tons of respect for SLPs - you guys know multitudes and do great work. I think both approaches are absolutely necessary. A behavioral understanding of language has helped me troubleshoot many times when a client just isn't picking something up - sometimes you'll be trying to teach a functional skill and realize, oh my god, this kid can't answer yes-no questions about an object because they don't already know what the object is, or they say "say" in front of everything because they've always been prompted "say ____" and we gotta fix that, or this kid doesn't label anything at all because praise has never been established as a reinforcer. Solid foundational knowledge of language from a behavioral perspective helps eliminate bad teaching. We're just in the habit of viewing every single thing humans do as part of a complex system of functional relations; we can't see the brain on a day-to-day basis so we look at what's observable and measurable. Often there is so much more at play than what is plainly visible, but a skilled analyst can find the holes. When we're working together, huge leaps can be made.

I hope that helps to clarify! I love talking about this stuff, so if I can answer anything else please let me know!

Edit: I forgot to add that language serves the same functions as other behavior, with language we can access things we want, escape aversive states or situations, get attention from others, or just have fun with it (automatic reinforcement).

In order to make and keep friends we must be friendly. We must be interested, not interesting.

People in general love to be listened to. They want to tell their story. They want to share their accomplishments and interests.

You may want to do all that stuff also, and that's great. But consider the type of people that easily get along with everyone: the listener. The listener is interested in what other people have going on in their lives. They ask questions about their friends. They show genuine interest in other people's lives, accomplishments, and interests.

It can be taxing to always be interested instead of interesting, but luckily there's the social law of reciprocity. When we give to others, they will feel socially compelled to give back. If we are genuinely interested in other people and carefully listen to what they have to say, and let them know we are interested in what they have to say, then anyone worth being a friend with will reciprocate and be interested back in you. A way of expressing this via idiom is to "Dig the well before you are thirsty."

To learn more about the law of reciprocity and other tools that will help you understand social dynamics and how they affect our relationships and our work I recommend reading the book Influence.

1. Read Neurotribes and anything by Temple Grandin as an introduction to how autism actually works. That's a really good start.
   
   
2. Maybe. I googled "Adults with autism Ontario" and hit this: https://www.autismontario.com/adults - it looks REALLY useful. They have workshops about future planning and transitions - I'd definitely get in touch.
   
   
3. Sometimes. Social stories help a lot. Jed Baker has written some helpful books - https://www.amazon.com/Preparing-Life-Transitioning-Adulthood-Aspergers/dp/1932565337?ie=UTF8&ref_=asap_bc and https://www.amazon.com/Social-Skills-Picture-School-Beyond/dp/1932565353?ie=UTF8&ref_=asap_bc...and I'm sure your local autism association will be able to help as well :)
   
   
4. You'd probably want help from a speech pathologist who specializes in autistic people (don't bother with someone who is not an autism specialist) - again hit up your local association for recommendations. Our speechies run social training classes as well...
   
   
5. Yeeeaaasss. But its (usually) hideously expensive. Here in Western Australia a child gets assessed by a clinical psychologist, a paeditatrician and a clinical psychologist. You fill out hundreds and hundreds of survey questions from proprietary surveys which are expensive to purchase and painful to code, from all accounts:) If you see a speechie, they can give you an assessment of his speech levels, but you'd want (probably) a Clinical Psychologist specialising in Autism to do a full assessment. Hit up your local association for recommendations, and brace your wallet !
   
   
6. Once again, I think Autism Ontario holds the answers here for you :)
   
   One last thing - we have a saying - if you know one person with autism, you know one person with autism :) So this:
   
   >Finn just knows his brother and how his brother is, so is of "little" help in the way I need
   
   is not necessarily true :) All you need to know is how Finn is, and you can go from there.
   
   May I also recommend /r/aspergers ? They have some excellent job and lifestyle related information over there as well...
   
   BTW - haven't mentioned this - but i think what you are doing is FANTASTIC. I cannot imagine how trapped and distressed Finn must be feeling in his current situation. You sound like such a loving person. I really hope this works out for you all !!

TL;DR - You can encourage your child to speak more frequently and fluently with behavioral reinforcement.

Sorry for the long post. I don't know what support your child has received/is receiving, so this may not be very relevant.

I have worked with a child with autism for over two years now. She was seven when I began working with her and had a similar speech pattern to what you described. She is also diagnosed with hyperlexia. She specifically had great trouble with who/what/when/where/why/which/how questions.

I first started with a simple token economy to reinforce "appropriate" speech. I used these bears as her tokens and placed them on a piece of paper on which I had printed a series of squares that were just larger than the base of the bear. I would ask her simple questions. If she answered them correctly, she would "earn a bear," and I would place it on a square for her. Once she filled a row with bears, she could trade them in for a high-preference activity. We would spend a few minutes on the trampoline or listen to a song or video and get back to work.

At first, she earned one bear for each answer, and she could trade them in when she had earned five. Within a day or two I was sure that she understood the system and moved up to ten. Within a week or two she had to earn 15 before she could have play time.

Throughout the process, I also conditioned her to be reinforced by the sound of me scooping a bear out of the bucket. I would intentionally have them make noise when I picked one up. Over the course of a few weeks, I worked to the point of:

• Answer 1 = hand to bucket, make noise moving bears
  
• Answer 2 = pick up bear
  
• Answer 3 = place bear on paper
  
  This way, she answered many questions before earning play time.
  
  When she was well adapted to this program, I began implementing punishment for "inappropriate" speech, which we called "chanting." When she would begin repeating phrases or speaking in sing-song, I would remind her to respond correctly. If she repeated the behavior, I would remove a bear.
  
  The questions that I asked began as simple ones. We would often look at photo flash cards and talk about the pictures. I began by asking the simplest questions possible:
  
  
• What is this?
  
• What color is it?
  
• What shape is it?
  
• Where do you find it?
  
• How many legs?
  
• Which one is tall?
  
  When she began to master these simple questions, I began adding in more difficult ones:
  
  
• What does it do?
  
• What is it made of?
  
  I continued to increase the difficulty of questions until I could simply ask her to describe or tell me about the image.
  
  I had accepted one-word responses at the beginning, but began encouraging multi-word responses or complete sentences when this became easy. If she answered with a phrase or sentence, I would give a bear immediately. When she used a single word, I would tell her a sentence using that word and have her repeat it before (possibly) getting her token.
  
  I did this for 30-90 minutes a day, five days a week, for about five months. We trailed off over the next several months and spent more time working on other skills until we did not do this at all anymore. Her language improved drastically in this time, but it did not develop her conversational ability. It brought her to the point that she could respond to questions and instructions with much more consistency than before. Because of this growth, she was able to begin classes in a general education setting with my assistance. Toward the end of the school year, she began occasionally initiating conversations with schoolmates on her own. Throughout the next school year, her interest and ability to speak with peers has continued to increase. This may be greatly due to her great interest in socializing and having friends, but your child definitely has hope.

I would talk to his teacher and see what they do at school. I don't know if he is having any aggressive behaviors at school. It is not uncommon for kids to show behaviors in one setting and not the other. Some of the reasons for that are different people, different setting, different task demands.

Here is information on token boards. I would suggest finding a token board that is highly motivating. I have a lot, if you tell me what he likes I can probably find a few in my collection. Here are some different types. They make them with cartoon characters. You need to look at what behaviors you want to address. You just need to pick 2, maybe 3 to start. Its like triage. What are the most important behaviors? Yeah, you may want him to brush his teeth, but is that as important as not hitting you? Give him some choices of what he is working for. He chooses, not you. They can be food, activities, anything. Most teachers laminate, but you can use clear contact paper. I would start with 5-7 tokens and move to 10. Make sure its clear on how to work for tokens (listening, calm hands, not climbing, etc).

I would also work on a calm area for him. Just a corner for him somewhere. Put a bean bag, a blanket he likes, and some stuff that is soothing. Since he likes to hit and climb, he probably needs some proprioception input, so things like theraputty would probably be good for him. If he starts escaping there all the time, a visual timer (nothing with numbers, think sand timer) to time it.

Again, I would check with the teacher to see if they are are seeing any behaviors at school. If so, what are they seeing and what behavior interventions they are doing. (They should be telling you if there are behaviors and if they aren't its a red flag.) If you start a token board at home, talk to the teacher and tell them that you want to use a token board in the classroom as well. Having follow through at school and at home will really reinforce the token system.

Now, I will warn you, with any behavior modification program, behaviors can get worse before they get better. Its called an extinguish burst. It doesn't mean its not working. Its just the last kicking up of the heels.

I would also work in some social stories because he would do really well with those.

Good luck mom.

This sounds like my son at that age, who was also middle of the spectrum. the developmental pediatrician recommended Floortime for us, which is an approach that was developed by Stanley Greenspan (child psychiatrist) together with Serena Wieder (I think psychologist). Sadly, Dr. Greenspan has passed away. However, I found those books and materials helpful, and we also received some help from trained Floortime therapists in our area.

Here is a youtube video of Dr. Greenspan helping a family: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vApghedypFc. That same channel has a whole bunch of videos: https://www.youtube.com/user/greenspanfloortime/videos

Here are some things you can check out in that direction, if you are interested:

1. one of his books ("engaging autism") on amazon, it has a bit of a preview you can look at: https://www.amazon.com/Engaging-Autism-Floortime-Approach-Communicate/dp/0738210943. same book on google books has a preview, not sure if it's the same preview! https://books.google.com/books?id=6MkBAwAAQBAJ&pg=PP1&lpg=PP1&dq=%22engaging+autism%22%5D%5D&source=bl&ots=Kifx6vM8fg&sig=odVVaeTq0bBI68Ak3IKNThnE3SM&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjh76X-mKjWAhWBOSYKHYOsBDkQ6AEIMjAC#v=onepage&q=%22engaging%20autism%22%5D%5D&f=false
   
   
2. some materials from the florida department of health about implementing the approach: http://www.floridahealth.gov/alternatesites/cms-kids/providers/early_steps/training/documents/floor_time.pdf
   
   
3. a short 2-pager from one of the organizations that implements the approach: https://www.stanleygreenspan.com/swf/The%20DIR%20Floortime%20Model.pdf
   
   In addition, this book here changed my life in terms of altering my outlook and helping me think more positively -- the authors are parents and doctors, and the mom-doctor is a neurologist, in fact -- there are some concrete helps in here -- a lot of the material is better for when your kid is older, maybe, because a lot of it is about helping them at school, but it helped me to shift my focus in a more positive direction, and just gave me a good framework for understanding things: https://www.amazon.com/Mislabeled-Child-Solutions-Childrens-Challenges/dp/1401308996/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1505513398&sr=1-1&keywords=the+mislabled+child
   
   Finally, I recommend this book, which can help you understand the sensory issues: https://www.amazon.com/Out-Sync-Child-Recognizing-Processing/dp/0399531653/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1505513523&sr=1-1&keywords=the+out+of+sync+child.
   
   And then get this one: https://www.amazon.com/Out-Sync-Child-Has-Revised/dp/0399532714/ref=pd_sim_14_1?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=7NP2KCQY50ZRWTC9JQA0, which will help you design activities around the sensory issues.
   
   I stopped here because I didn't want to overwhelm you, but let me know if you want more recommendations, more info, or more shared experience. happy to help, just let me know. feel free to pm me also. my kid is now 10.

How do you teach you self different disciplines? Any tips/methods? I'm attempting something similar with math and programming.


Anyway, about autism...


Like people said, learn about aspergers/autism. I recommend reading look me in the eye, its a fascinating autobiography of a man with aspergers. http://www.amazon.com/Look-Me-Eye-Life-Aspergers/dp/0307395987

And look for books that describe behaviors of people with aspergers, read about how they live. Having aspergers is not a disease or a disorder, its a atypical neurology. It can be a impediment and a advantage. There are a LOT of resources for people with autism, you just have to find them. Is your diagnose a official diagnose? If you can get accommodations at work, this is worth reading --> http://askjan.org/media/asperger.html


Also I hear Temple Grandin (famous woman aspie) has some good books on having aspergers, check your local library.


You should talk to your therapist about your depression and thoughts of suicide. A lot of aspies have struggled with depression. Humans are social creatures, and having poor social skills can make it hard to connect with other people. A pet like a cat or dog can be a good friend if you have few friends, or even just need somebody to hug. If your having suicidal/depression related thoughts you should really talk to your therapist, they may be able to give you strategies to deal with them. I would not suggest meds, it works for some people, but it should be a last resort.

Make sure your getting enough sleep, you need 8 hours of sleep a night, try and wake and fall asleep at the same times every day. The human body likes routine. Diet and excicise are also very important, if your eating shitty unnutritional food, your body will respond accordingly. Try and buy fresh food every week, find your local farmers market, grow your own, fresh food is good!

You need at least an hour of intense physical activity a day. I recommend cardio (increasing your heart rate, something where you run around) and lifting weights. Stretching is also important, but the other 2 are more important.

If you want I can send you some lists (info pictures) on exercise and healthy food.

Do you get stressed a lot? Its common for aspies. Learning to meditate, or yoga a few times a week can help reduce your stress. Or just taking a 40 minutes out of each day to have some time to yourself. Sit in front of a window or in a quiet park and do some deep breathing. Let your mind clear, lift the fog and confusion of stress and bulllshit away. And let ocean waves of calmness and cool water wash over your mind and body.

Speaking of water, drink more of it! Not drinking enough water through out the day can cause you to feel crappy. (We all really do need 8 glasses a day!)

That's all I can think of for now, even you want to chat feel free to pm me.

Edit: Forgot to mention I've struggled with depression myself, and regular exercise has helped me feel better. The "runners high" I get after a nice sweaty run is a refeshing feeling, the "happy buzz" I get after working out for 40 minutes. I still get depressed, but I have more energy when I exert myself regularly.

Might be a dodge, but I think any book that can tell how to reduce anxiety or manage stress would have value.

NeuroTribes has some history of our condition, and might help you feel better about having it.

Mozart and the Whale is kind - of romantic comedy, but is available in book and video, and true.

The Curious Case of the Dog in the Night-Time might show a little of what it is like to be an autistic kid, but maybe not much about practical advice for parenting.

Temple Grandin has written several, which seem to be mostly about what it is like being autistic, and maybe some of the strengths.

Cutting-Edge Therapies for Autism might be worth a look, but last I saw, had little with which to compare costs and benefits.

You also might want to check out SPARK, which will do a free DNA test, and give Amazon gift vouchers for participating in their research.

I really like this book a lot. A very good reminder of the patience needed and the reasons for it: Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew .

Remember that a lot of delays are just that. Keep working at little things as calmly and consistently as possible. Potty training might come late. Tying shoes might come late. Riding a bike might come late. Learning multiplication might come late. But if you keep working on all of the little pieces, eventually all of those things they learned late become things they actually learned and you will end up not caring about the WHEN when you look back on them. I thought about that today while my wife walked to the store following our kids who were on their bikes. Our son with autism learned this year at 9 1/2 instead of 4-7 like most of the kids in the neighborhood. While they were riding, I watched him watching his twin sister who was pedaling while standing up. He gave it a couple mild tries and then gave up. He wasn't ready today. I bet you it isn't long before he is doing that too.

Also, try to keep him as close to regular Education class rooms as possible. Our son went from a special Ed full time class to a full time regular Ed (with an in class aide) during 3rd grade. He made more social/academic developments in that one year than all of his other schooling combined (and he had 2 years of preschool). He also made several friends in the class that warmly greet him whenever we are together and even come over to play when we remember to invite them. They love him for all the strange things that he does and the excitement and fun he always seems like he is having. He loves them because he loves kids his age.

The school system will do evaluations and assessments and if he does qualify for special education, they will make an IEP and then you can look for services such as ABA if that is what you would like to do. The IEP process can be confusing and intimidating, and I highly recommend buying a book about IEP & special education laws (something like this http://www.amazon.com/Wrightslaw-Emotions-Advocacy-Education-Survival/dp/1892320096/ref=pd_sim_b_1?ie=UTF8&refRID=1EZY9R4M8VA69ZEV2Q2W )

You can also get a referral from your doctor to see a specialist and get additional evaluations done if you are not comfortable with only the school district's evaluation.

Texas has a program that offers ABA therapy and other services to children between 3-8 (once early intervention services end at 3yrs). It is funded through grants and is on a sliding scale depending on income and services required.

http://www.dars.state.tx.us/stakeholders/autism/index.shtml

I know this is all a lot to take in and try to sort out. The beginning of this journey will be tough but it gets better. The CDC has a great roadmap for what to do once you suspect your child has autism. It's got great suggestions and strategies.

http://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/actearly/concerned.html

Autism Speaks has an awesome resource for parents in the early stages of the process that introduces everything you will need to know to make well-informed decisions . It's called the First 100 Days Kit.

http://www.autismspeaks.org/docs/family_services_docs/100_day_kit.pdf

If you have more questions while you are waiting for services, feel free to PM me and I'd be happy to help.

There is no biomedical treatment for the core symptoms of autism that has been tested scientifically and found effective. Most biomedical treatments are promoted on the basis of anecdotes rather than high-quality scientific studies. The problem with anecdotes is that (1) you don't know whether the child actually changed or not (it's possible for parents to see what they want to see) and (2) you don't know whether the change was due to the treatment. The child might have been ready to learn some new skills anyway, or the change might have been due to another treatment happening at the same time.

Applied behavior analysis is form of treatment that directly teaches new skills and has been found effective by scientific studies. It sounds like he's already receiving that or something similar. (By the way, four useful signs in two months is pretty good!)

(1) Normally, when a new drug is studied, the government requires careful tests to show what ages it is safe for. They also carefully track the drug after it's released. The biomedical treatments typically haven't undergone these studies, so I can't say whether 18 months is "too young". I would urge you to talk to a regular pediatrician (not one who specializes in biomedical autism treatments) about anything you want to try.

(2) Yes. All treatments have side effects. Biomedical treatments for autism have not gone through the rigorous government testing that is required for other medicines and procedures, so we don't know exactly what the side effects are.

However, there are two procedures which have caused fatalities: chelation and hyperbaric oxygen therapy. Chelation is a medical procedure for removing heavy metals from the body. It is used by doctors when a person has been exposed to toxic metals, such as industrial waste or lead poisoning. There is no evidence that people with autism have these toxins or that these toxins would cause autism in the first place. Chelation is a dangerous treatment and can cause cardiac arrest. Hyperbaric oxygen therapy makes a person breathe pure oxygen instead of normal air. It is used when a person has severe damage to their lungs and in a few other situations. Pure oxygen ignites very easily and children have died in the resulting fires.

Other forms of biomedical treatment have unknown side effects. They can interact with important medications (like antibiotics for an ear infection). Some might not harm physical health, but cause a lot of unnecessary stress and unhappiness. For example, I've seen families run themselves ragged trying to enforce a very specific diet that doesn't have any evidence of effectiveness. If you do choose to try them, I strongly urge you to talk with a regular pediatrician first.

(3) Not that I'm aware of. Insurances generally limit themselves to scientifically accepted treatments. You'd have to pay out of pocket, which is a significant "side effect" all on its own.

(4) I would imagine that you can guess based on what I've already written that my answer is 'no'. I think that there are good, effective therapies that can help your child grow and that spending time, effort, and money on potentially dangerous biomedical products takes resources away from effective treatment.

If there is a biomedical change that is cheap or free, requires little effort or stress (for you or your child), and has been approved by a regular pediatrician, then I would urge you to keep very careful notes on how it's working so you don't fall prey to the traps in (1).

Your child is very young and the thought of a lifetime disability can seem frightening, but many, many people with autism (including many people on this message board) lead happy lives. If you have an hour and a half (and I know that time is precious commodity when you have a 1-year-old), I would recommend the movie Loving Lampposts. It shows a whole variety of different kinds of autistic people and different kinds of autism treatments.

If I can answer any other questions, I'd be happy to try.

I second darn tough socks. I also hate the feeling of seams on socks. Darn tough are very cozy and comfortable and I’m sitting here at work pushing my toes to the front of my socks trying to feel the seam and I can’t. I’m not sure about the female equivalent socks I use but these look about right. Light cushion is their thinnest, cushion is a good everyday sock and full cushion is thickest and best for winter. I hope this helps. I absolutely love my socks and have turned 5 people on to them who have all now got rid of all their old socks and only wear these. I realize I’m starting to sound like I work for them I swear I don’t lol.

I have a problem with things like "Good Morning" because my brain just kinda says "Yes, it is" and it would be silly to say that every time someone said something that made sense to me. Most of the time i remember it's a salutation but it's caused some misunderstandings and yelled greetings. The song "Good Mornin' to You" from Singin' in the Rain helps me remember it's something directed at me. I would try "Good Morning to you!" I had to start with "I bid you a good morning." The first time i heard "What's up?" at 14 i responded with "Not a whole lot, what is it that is up with you?" Also, my age mates and i couldn't understand each other until about 3rd-4th grade. Their speech sounded like jibberish to me and i sounded like stereo/ikea furniture instructions to them. Keep practicing with and building confidence in her and with the other supports you mentioned i think you'll be pleasantly surprised. You mentioned her singing a lot, that's awesome! If it weren't for band and choir i probably would have gotten a lot less social/conversation practice. I'm not college educated but i think the part of your brain that processes the intervals in between musical notes is the same part that processes language. On top of that, a lot of conversational English is used in songs. As she gets older and more listening options become appropriate it'll be a good form for learning informal speech.

On the eating thing, as i am told my dad had to step in. Mom was overthinking everything and worrying herself sick and Dad had to say "Calm down, when she's hungry, she'll eat." Having the food i didn't like near me while eating a food i liked helped me get over some stuff, although i am admittedly very picky now. The Sneaky Chef and Deceptively Delicious are good ways to start "sneaking" other veggies in. For example if she hates cauliflower i think one of those sources has a mac 'n' cheese recipe that uses it. I would make it for her one day, let her enjoy it. Ask if next time she wants to help make it. I thought i hated cabbage until i learned how to make egg rolls a couple years ago. If she likes pickles pickling things can be fairly easy. This is a Harvard lecture about fermentation and pickling (about 30-40 mins in they get to the pickling.) Maybe you two can make a hobby out of pickling new things and then trying them? I know it's not the best but my parents always knew their Hail Mary was to just batter it, fry it, and let me dip it in ketchup. When i was around 7 letting me add a drop or two of food coloring to a food i knew kinda made me more adventurous. If this tasty thing can look gross and still be tasty, maybe things that look gross can be tasty, too.

I don't have children, myself, so i am admittedly a bit ignorant on the bathroom thing. If i'm not mistaken i think the "Do you know why Mommy, Daddy, and Big Sis wear different underwear?" approach worked. I know i had bed wetting problems until 3rd-4th grade. If i get stressed out or really anxious i pee myself sometimes, still. I won't have to go badly i'll just start peeing the second i walk into a bathroom. Sometimes i don't notice i have to go until it's near critical. Normally not a big deal but if you're in a group of people you can look crazy shouting for a bathroom when we just passed one not 15 mins ago... When i was little i was afraid to be myself. That kept me out of the bathroom a lot, knowing i had to be alone in there. I tried to keep the door open so i could still hear other people. If i couldn't do that i would just be super fast. People actually comment often about how quick i "get my business" done. I don't know how to tell them it was totally cultivated by fear. I would try asking her is there is any reason she doesn't like the bathroom before it even comes up. You'll probably have to repeat to her that she's not in trouble. If i thought that at all i freaked out. Maybe a handheld mp3 player or walkie talkie. With a walkie talkie you're not just going poo, you're a secret agent evacuating prisoners and reporting back to headquarters! Receive the order to cease operations and clean up. I also had a Raggedy Ann doll that i took in there with me. It's just a doll but a buddy helped.

When i got discouraged my dad would remind me "Some people are gonna be faster, some people are gonna be slower. In some things you will be faster, in some things you will be slower. It's just a part of life. It's nothing to be ashamed of." He he, i freaking love my dad.

Our child has the opposite issue, he loves solid foods and hates slimy foods. Have you tried something like Gerber's Graduates (http://www.amazon.com/Gerber-Graduates-Crunchies-1-48-Ounce-Canisters/dp/B000MXHQTS/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1452528757&sr=8-1&keywords=gerbers+lil+crunchies)

We started off with that because they are solid but literally melt in your mouth as soon as you put them in so it was a good transition for him.

Also on the teeth brushing, we face the same issue. It is near impossible to get him to brush and we have tried different ones like banana brush, curious george brush which he likes etc. Right now it is a daily struggle to get him to brush in the morning and night but it is important to keep trying.

For sometime we just let him roam around with a banana brush and he will just go around rubbing it around his mouth which is still better than nothing.

Another technique which we have had some success with is taking a picture/video of him brushing and showing it to him. This worked a couple of times where he tries to copy that but he likes phones/iPads so much that just becomes a distraction. Next we are thinking of printing it out and showing it to him.

I'm glad you brought that up with statistics because that is absolutely true. Autism is a hot topic. However, I do think the emotions of the children involved should come into play and not just the numbers too. Even if we had studies showing that most children enjoyed and didn't feel harmed, it would be biased because the child grew up in that environment and would have no comparison to know what it would have been like otherwise.

With a quick search this site has a list of research on Collaborative Problem Solving: http://www.livesinthebalance.org/research

Studies like this talk about issues with rewards even: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/10589297

I found this document referring to studies for Love & Logic which deals with logical/natural consequences versus punishment/rewards: https://www.loveandlogic.com/documents/9%20Essential%20Skills-Supporting%20Theory%20and%20Research.pdf

I have done more research in other areas, but this is what I found in the topic. I also recommend Ungifted: Intelligence Redinfed by Scott Barry Kaufman. Was a very interesting read and talks about a number of things as well. (https://www.amazon.com/Ungifted-Intelligence-Scott-Barry-Kaufman/dp/0465025544)

> For instance, in reality while people with ASD-1 struggle to understand nonliteral language, they certainly don't miss absolutely every single instance of it.

I completely agree with this. Also, his therapist is terrible, so it almost seems like he was getting basically no support to start with in the first place. He barely learns a single thing about interacting with people (or learning idioms) in the entire season. The only person who tries to teach him anything is his dad. The therapist seems like she's never interacted with an autistic person in her life (and maybe she is supposed to be new at this? i'm not sure, she is young). That's my biggest gripe about it.

I just started reading this book called Mockingbird, a fictional book about an autistic girl. I feel like she is actually an autistic person rather than putting a bunch of symptoms together. I'm really enjoying it. I'm about halfway through. It's hilarious just to remember similar things that I would do or think as a kid as well.

And the best part about that fictional book is she has a real school counselor who does actually try to teach her how to interact with people. And if she accidentally uses idioms, she either apologizes or actually explains the idiom to her, and she doesn't use idioms that much at all, because of course she knows she won't completely understand a lot of times.

Also in that book she thinks her dad is saying "fun raiser" and not "fund raiser." I also thought this as a kid Lol.