(Part 2) Best products from r/internetparents

Lots of good suggestions in here, but I'm going to add two things: canned soup for a cheap meal in 3 minutes, and getting a slow cooker for some of the easiest recipes you'll ever make.

In terms of simply making a super-quick, cheap, hot meal, keep some canned soup in the pantry. Not the condensed stuff (the kind that needs to have water added); get Campbell's Chunky or some other such canned soup. They usually run under $3 a can, and you can get them under $2 on sale. I stock up on about a dozen anytime they're on sale, and anytime I need a quick meal, it's ready in 3 minutes (or a little longer on the stovetop). Most soups are going to have meat, vegetables, starches...a good well-rounded meal. If you want something solid to go with it, add a grilled cheese (two slices of bread, slice of cheese, and butter on the outside--to make it a little tastier, spread a little mayo on the inside of the bread; cook over low/medium heat, a couple minutes each side).

Now, if you want some easy home-cooking, buy yourself a slow cooker (aka a Crock Pot). [Here's a perfectly good one for $30] (http://www.amazon.com/Crock-Pot-SCCPVL600S-6-Quart-Portable-Stainless/dp/B003HF6PUO/ref=lp_694666_1_1?s=kitchen&ie=UTF8&qid=1407627658&sr=1-1). Crock Pot recipes are the easiest thing you'll ever make -- basically throw some chicken or beef in the pot with some broth, add vegetables and/or potatoes, and then let it simmer all day while you're at work. When you get home, you've got a hot meal ready to go, and you'll have leftovers for a couple days.

Just with some googling, here's [a simple pot roast] (http://allrecipes.com/recipe/maries-easy-slow-cooker-pot-roast/), here's [one for chicken noodle soup] (http://www.realsimple.com/food-recipes/browse-all-recipes/chicken-pasta-soup-00000000039971/index.html). Best thing about a slow cooker is you really can't screw it up -- it's just putting your ingredients in broth and letting it simmer all day. You can also buy seasoning packets at the market that help with more complicated things like pulled pork by mixing all the spices you need -- all you do is add it to a couple ingredients and put the meat in the pot.

• Be a cheap bastard Cut all unnecessary expenses. That Xbox Gold Membership for example isn't going to break your budget, but it's important to get in the right frugal mindset when you are first venturing out on your own. You're going to make mistakes like we all do at that age, and if you aren't prepared for them you'll find yourself asking your parents for help or even worse begging them to let you move back in so you aren't homeless.
  
• Income Look at what you've made every week/month going back as far as you can with you uncle. Then average it out. Whatever that number is, is your weekly/monthly income. Put all of your money in the bank and only use you average weekly/monthly income from that amount. If this average weekly income is not enough to get by then look for a part time evening job to supplement your income with. If you're doing online classes exclusively and they don't require you to login at specific times then you have enough flexibility to make this happen easily. It'll still be hard work though.
  Be prepared for your income from you uncle to disappear if things go south when you leave. Don't expect anything you depend on to be there after you leave.
  
• Transportation Hopefully you have a car and no payments on it. If so, all you'll need to do it get liability insurance on it. Figure out what you spend on gas.
  
• Furnishings Figure out what your parents will allow you to take with you. If your bedroom furniture is going to be staying there, then you need to have money replace those. You can start out cheap, super cheap. Just get a memory foam mattress on Amazon.com for like $110, and a couple of those plastic chest of drawers to put your stuff in and a cheap sheet/blanket set from some place like Ross, TJMax or Marshalls. You can get a inflatable bed for cheaper, but they leak and pop and when they do they are worthless. A regular mattress will last for years, won't be worthless if you accidentally drop something on it, and will let you sleep much better at night.
  
• Save money Start stacking your cash now, and save up enough money to cover these "move out" expenses, even if you don't think you'll need to buy a mattress, save up money to buy one anyway. If you don't have to buy furniture then you can use the money to start your emergency fund. Sometimes people get weird when you leave and they might change their mind about what they let you take. Then save up enough money to pay all of your bills for 3 months. Rent, insurance, gas, food, etc. Everything you spend money. Never touch this money unless you loose your income, or your income drops below what you need to pay your bills. When your income returns to normal, immediately begin replenishing it. Once you move out you should start an emergency fund also, that is separate from your 3 months of bills fund. An emergency fund should have enough money to cover things like a unexpected major car repair, insurance deductible, or medical bill. Learn how to pretend that this money isn't there. This is the key to independence that most people fail at and how people get caught in the debt cycle of borrowing for emergencies. Borrowing money like this can haunt your finances for years and encourages more poor financial decisions later.
  
• Look for a room for rent Not an apartment, but a room that is somewhere between 25-30% of your average monthly income. (This can go as high as 50% depending on what area you live in. I'm looking at you SF and NYC!) When you do this, make sure you have a lease or rental agreement that specifies the rent amount and what ever terms you agree on with the person you rent from. It doesn't have to be complicated, it can just be a hand written note with a rent amount and date you moved in. So long as you have proof that you are a tenant. Go to the your bank and ask them to notarize it. Both parties will need to be present, but you can have the person meet you there to get the first months rent. Always pay by check, or get a receipt if you pay by cash and keep a record of these. My personal preference is to use the Google Drive app to scan them in as PDFs. If your room doesn't have a private entrance, ask if you can put one on before you move in. They are cheap, like $15 from Walmart.
  
• Moving out If you think moving out will turn into a shirt storm, then don't say anything ahead of time. Begin quietly moving important things, like pictures, clothes and other personal belongings that cannot be replaced. Once they are secure in your new place, move other stuff. Then get help from a friend to come over and finish moving everything else in one fell swoop. If you think they'll be okay with you moving out then let them know, but only after you've secured a place to live, and your irreplaceable personal belongings. Then tell them that you're thinking of getting your own place. Then pretend that you found a place really quickly and move anytime.
  
• Meal Prep It's not just for gym rats. It can save you a ton of money. Taco soup is one of my favorites. I can make enough to have for lunch for 5 days. $5 for ground beef, $4 for canned veggies, and $2 for taco/ranch seasoning. $2.50 a meal is crazy cheap and it's pretty healthy too. Ramen is another great option. Get your favorite flavor and buy some frozen veggies and add them to your soup. You bowl of empty carbs instantly turns into a decent meal that cost less than $1. There is no limit to what you can add to Ramen to keep it from getting boring.
  
  All of this saving is important to your stability, but if things get bad before these funds are fully funded don't be afraid to pull the trigger. It doesn't sound like there is any immediate danger for you, just lots of feeling uncomfortable. You feel terrible right now because your stuck somewhere with no reasonable means out. You'll be surprised to find out that once you have some savings and the ability to move out when ever you want how much more bearable the situation is. Regardless, don't move out before you are financially ready to do so. Feeling uncomfortable and weird around you family isn't good enough reason to move before your finances are right.

I'm going to just add another comment because now I've read your post history. Here's what I see:

• You are indulging yourself by wallowing in sad music, letters about her, etc. I know that feels harsh. But again, it's not helpful to do this. It allows you to stay in the relationship that's ended rather than moving on.
  
  
• You are angry with her and you are not allowing yourself to see that. You cover it up by talking about how you just want her to feel special, but you do not control how she feels and you want to control her. Do you see how this is about control, and anger that she won't talk to you and allow you to treat her wonderfully? There's a process we go through to get over breakups: blame them, blame ourselves, forgive them, forgive ourselves. You have to do all four steps to move on. If she is perfect and you are just trying to love her, you don't have to blame her or yourself. You're both still perfect. You need her as your mirror to feel perfect and special and that's not healthy.
  
  
• Suicide is ultimately about not wanting to change. Change is brutally hard. When we get dumped in a relationship that feels like a drug, we find out the parts of ourself that are not complete. We have the choice of working to complete those parts, or of giving up and saying it's too hard. I have been where you are and done that work and it sucks. But if you want to live, it's necessary. It starts by shutting down the obsessive thoughts. Make the commitment to do it and then, when you notice the thoughts, make the choice to stop. Find a reliable substitute (a lesser addiction). Some people use exercise or social activities. Whatever works for you, when you have that urge to wallow, do that substitute instead.
  
  
• Talk to your parents. They are the friends who will not give up on you. You don't have to tell them the situation. Just tell them you are struggling (they already know) and that you would appreciate their support. Call and just ask them to talk about their day if all else fails and listen. You need to stop isolating yourself.
  
  
• Speaking of that, be with people. Go to the library, Starbucks, a bus stop. Just being with others helps, even if you're not directly interacting.
  
  https://www.amazon.com/Love-Addiction-Stanton-Peele-ebook/dp/B00IVAQQOK
  
  I'm sure there are other, more recent books, but this is the classic and it's what I read 31 years ago.
  
  It gets better, OP. I am married now and have a great life and two grown kids. I would have missed out on all this if I hadn't confronted my own obsession and unwillingness to give up a relationship that felt like a drug. And no, my marriage does not feel like that. And yes, I do still think back on that other relationship, even after all this time, because it helped me to see where and how I needed to change to be a whole person. It's really hard to do, but most of us have had to do it.
  
  Let go of how special she is, and how special you are by extension. Let her go.
  
  

I’m gonna be the unpopular person who says that you don’t have to pack light. Especially if you’re staying put in the same hotel etc. You’re most likely checking your suitcase in transit so who cares if it’s bigger or packed to capacity? I travel with larger bags (on wheels) all the time and I can honestly say that if my bag is a few inches bigger or a couple pounds heavier it makes zero difference. Just make sure you’re within the airlines guidelines.

SO. My point is, don’t put too much pressure on yourself to pack perfectly. If you can’t decide between a couple shirts, just bring both. You’ll be happier later when you have the choice. Check the weather for the time of year or dates you’re going and then look at your wardrobe. What would you be comfortable in? Pack those things. Look at your itinerary, what do you need to dress for? Pack those things. Stick to just a couple pairs of shoes. They take up the most space/are bulky. Good walking shoes are probably a must and then a pair to dress up a little with if you go somewhere nicer. If you can do laundry somewhere great, if not it’s ok to pack a few more pairs of underwear and shirts. Also consider packing some Shout Wipes in case you stain something you had hoped to rewear. Plan on wearing pants multiple times. For Scotland def pack some rain-appropriate things like a jacket etc.

Get some travel size toiletries and think about extras you might need. Yes you could buy Tylenol while there if you have a headache but then you have to go find it and depending on where you are it may be more expensive. It’s a small and light thing anyway so just pack some just in case. Think about other things like that.

Bring entertainment for the flight as well as snacks if you don’t want to pay for them onboard (airplane snacks can be pricey). Download books, movies, shows onto electronics ahead of time.

Lastly you might need power adapters depending on where you are coming from. Make sure you have a few so you can charge all of your tech. You might also consider getting a battery pack so you can charge on the go. Nothing worse than your entertainment dying mid-flight or your phone dying as you try to get an Uber. I love this one.

"Season to taste" is often hard at the beginning while you're learning but honestly - it's always hard for some people. You might be like most people who learn by trial and error or you might be like my best friend who just has a very limited sense of taste. (I'm not exaggerating. He can describe a sauce as "red" but can't tell if it's tomato-based.) If, after trying for a while, you find you're one of those few who continue to struggle, then look for "staple" dishes you enjoy eating and take specific notes about the seasoning levels everyone likes so you can just replicate the measurements down the road.

With things like salt and pepper, remember that you can always add more later so you don't have to figure out the perfect amount while cooking the larger portion; folks can just season their own servings if needed.

These are kind of cute and give informal measurements of "A dash = 1/8 tsp, a pinch= 1/16 tsp and a smidgen = 1/32 tsp." Maybe you use measurements like this as a "cheat sheet" until you figure out what tastes good to you.

For your kitchen:

• Two or three sets of dishes, bowls, glasses, utensils, or more if you plan on having friends over for dinner often.
  
• Some microwave-safe glass bowls. If you get ones with silicone lids, you can also use them to store leftovers.
  
• A small frying pan, a small cooking pot, a cookie sheet. (You'll use the cookie sheet for lots of things, not just cookies.)
  
• A spatula, some wooden stirring/serving spoons.
  
• A can opener with bottle opener.
  
• Dishwashing soap, sponges, a couple of drying towels.
  
• A toaster, a crockpot, a rice-cooker/instapot. Each of these appliances can be bought new for less than $20, if you shop carefully and look for sales.
  
• Depending on how much cooking you plan on doing, you'll eventually want to expand your kitchen set to include more food storage, more cooking utensils, measuring cups, a colander, oven mitts, etc.
  
• Most of this can be bought for almost nothing at your local Goodwill or thrift store, you can spend real money on nicer stuff later on, once you know what you really want.
  
  For your bedroom:
  
  
• A laundry hamper or laundry bag.
  
• A small trashcan.
  
• A couple sets of fitted bedsheets.
  
• A couple sets of pillowcases.
  
  For your bathroom:
  
  
• Another small trashcan.
  
• A toilet scrub brush.
  
• Toilet bowl cleaner.
  
• A plunger, and learn how to use it effectively.
  
• Three or four bath towels, and a couple of hand towels.
  
• A shower curtain.
  
  For general cleaning:
  
  
• A broom and dustpan.
  
• A sponge-type mop.
  
• A mop bucket that will fit your mop.
  
• Multi-surface cleaning spray.
  
• Window/mirror cleaning spray.
  
• A garbage can with a lid, and garbage bags that fit the can.
  
• Paper towels are nice to have for spills and messes and basic cleaning, get ones marked as "select-a-size," that means the perforations are more closely spaced so you don't need to waste a huge square of paper when you only need a little one.
  
• A vacuum, if you have carpets or rugs. You can buy a cheap one like this, consider investing in a nicer one later.
  
  First aid kit, because mom isn't there to help when you get sick:
  
  
• An assortment box of bandaids and antibiotic ointment.
  
• A roll of gauze bandage, just in case you get a more serious bleeding cut.
  
• A coldpack that you can keep in the freezer.
  
• Cold medicine and cough drops.
  
• Pain relief like Advil or Tylenol, generic is perfectly fine.
  
• Antacids like Tums, generic is fine.

(23 F bisexual, with a varied relationship history w/ men, non-binaries, and women)

I think a major issue with TRP is that they are determined to think of women as a hive mind. You can see how easy that mindset is to get into by looking at your search history - unfortunately, asking 'what do women want' is about as useful as asking 'what do men want' - we all know there is vast variation at the individual level.

The difference between you and them is that if a woman were to walk up to you and say 'i would like to be respected and not be subordinate to you', your response would not be 'you don't really mean that, because what women really want is [insert horrifying statement]', because at the end of the day you're aware that women are individuals.

Knowing that women are in fact people is not a magic bullet to getting the girl/relationship you want, and it's worth remembering that sexism is a systemic issue, which means that women can also believe it (I really liked someone else's comment about 'lizard brain' versus human brain) and gravitate toward it.

However, I really do think I am a person, and I only date men who I won't have to convince of that fact. If a dude makes statements like 'you're not like other girls', he goes straight out the window, because I am not going to date a man who thinks 'other girls' are a monolith of shit. However, no redpill dude is ever going to come close to me, which is why it's so easy for them to reaffirm their worldview.

You are on the right track to being a trustworthy and wise person, and I would encourage you to keep on your track. Maybe look for dating advice authored by women!

edit: I grabbed a link to one google drive that's (I think) totally authored by women, talking about 'emotional labour', which is a huge thing you can be aware of if you want to be a good partner: here it is!

another link is to Nick Offerman's book/audiobook, which I listened to with my old boss (I used to do leatherwork, very manly), which I think is a really good perspective on manliness. jordan peterson may tell you that women are 'the dragon of chaos', but nick offerman is actually a success in the entertainment and woodworking world, and it does appear he's had positive relationships with women.

​

You've received a lot of great comments and tips. My two cents: instead of a crockpot/slow cooker, consider getting an electric pressure cooker. I have the Instant Pot, which is primarily an electric pressure cooker but also has a slow cooker function. Best of both worlds in one unit! Then, you can make all the excellent slow-cooker recipes you have here on top of the quick and super-easy pressure cooker ones. My favorite pressure cooker sites are:

[Dad Cooks Dinner] (http://dadcooksdinner.com/)

[Hip Pressure Cooking] (http://www.hippressurecooking.com/)

Favorite PC cookbooks - either [Great Big Pressure Cooker] (https://www.amazon.com/Great-Big-Pressure-Cooker-Book/dp/0804185328/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1483205095&sr=8-5&keywords=pressure+cooker+cookbook) cookbook, or any of the Lorna Sass books like Cooking Under Pressure, etc.

Best of luck to you!

I read a book that talks about different ways to approach and solve arguments. Your post reminded me of it and it really helped me out.

Maybe it will help you manage or be able to see her point, and likewise if she reads it both of you can come to an understanding as well. It's called Crucial Conversations Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High. I'm not much of a book reader myself but part of the book is very clear about communication styles, how people can shut down or approach a situation when they are uncomfortable, how to pull people out of their shells, and more. I really recommend it.

As for calming down, it would help to be vocal about needing some time to process your feelings and to think about the topic at hand. It gives insight and shows you're letting her in rather than giving the impression that you're shutting her out. Better to chill than talk with guns ablazing (aka being volatile). It is not healthy to talk while volatile. The book I mentioned talks about this too. In an argument when you feel like you're shutting down, you should let her know that you need some time before talking again.

You can buy property with cash as soon as you have the money.

A house with all those bits will cost around 25k and need work. You will find cheaper but have to do a lot of work to fix it up, shacks and foreclosures and the like.

Under the age of 18 you cannot be legally held to a contract, so you really can't get a loan or financing (I believe that you could still with a co-signer, but that does require some legal research on your part)

My advice? Get a job and save up money until you can afford a plot of land out of the way. Then look into building "tiny houses" or finding a camper or trailer that fits your needs, so long as you can repair it by yourself. Cheap, DIY, and... erm.., "builds character."

Home/property ownership is an insane level of responsibility, ours was a foreclosure that took a ton of work to make comfortable, and we've long acknowledged that it will never be finished.

Good internet is nearly impossible in the areas your talking about though, more than 5 minutes out of a small town in Texas and your lucky to get a 10mb/s connection with a 10gb monthly cap for $50.

I had a similar daydream when I was a teenager, its cool to see there are still people that want a little disconnect from the rest of the world.

If you are REALLY feeling frisky, pick up this book: The Fifty Dollar Underground House Book
It is crazy out of date, but the principles are still there and filled my head with fantastical ideas when I was your age.

For that matter, just google up some pictures of Tiny Houses. They can be made for a couple of grand and if you made one it would impress the hell out of your parents ( and any date you might be able to fit through the door :-) )

Did your contract come with a home warranty? That saved us a lot of money the first year. You can still get one yourself if it didn’t come with one.

Things I think you should buy:


Ceiling fan duster here. I use it to not only clean my ceiling fans but it does a fantastic job of cleaning the air vents on tall ceilings. I literally love this thing.

Speaking of air vents we have washable filters for ours here. I set a reminder on my phone to wash them out once a month. No having to remember to go by Home Depot or Lowe’s to get them all the time.

Also a spray mop that you can put your own cleaning solution in. I don’t trust swiffer to know how much juice I want in my mop haha. You can find it here.

These are all the exact models of the ones I have so I do recommend them!

There's a cooking for beginner's subreddit as well by the way.

---

I found certain cook books more helpful than others. As a science type, I deeply appreciated this time which should be in your local library. It explains what "meat" is: muscles, and how it all works, and how heat affects it chemically. All the steps are very clear, the photography is beautiful, and steps are written exactly like a chemistry lab.

The meat chapter explains why different cuts of meat are different and what to do with each.

---

Start with beef or good quality fish: both are safe to eat even if undercooked. Maybe take a scientific approach, even: cut up different chunks of the same size, blot dry with paper towel to minimize splutter.

Put pan on stove at medium setting, add about teaspoon of oil and spread across surface evenly. When you can feel heat on your hand about 3 inches from the heated surface, add meat.

After one minute remove one chunk and rest on plate. After another minute remove another. And so on. Observe the differences. Now taste them. Then add little salt and pepper and taste again.

Small steps. :)

I used to be the kid who threw pop corn kernels on the stove without oil and almost set the house on fire. My then boyfriend needed to walk me through cooking my first egg. We all start somewhere.

My wife and I both read the [5 Love Languages] (https://www.amazon.com/Love-Languages-Secret-that-Lasts/dp/080241270X) book from the library. It really helps with examining the way you express love and also helps identify how others express it. If you're both the same, then it's pretty easy, but it gets a little difficult when you are different (which is most people). If nothing else it's been helpful at just training you to think about things like showing love in a format that your partner is most receptive to and helps a little with communication across styles.

Okay microfiber sheet great

Comforter and duvet. I bought my comforter on amazon and its amazing it was 30 bucks

My duvet was 80 bc I loved the pattern and its pottery barn on ebay. You can buy for less though

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00UXLH5JK/ref=oh_aui_search_detailpage?ie=UTF8&psc=1

That is my comforter. I live in texas and the temps drop or rise without notice. I hate being cold or hot and I feel like it keeps me even

$250 certainly is not a huge food budget. Depending on how you feel about cooking, you can certainly work with it.

I recommend you look around at various food and cooking subreddits that take budget into consideration. We're talking EatCheapAndHealthy, not FoodPorn. Look at appealing and approachable recipes for common ingredients. If you cook those sorts of recipes, those common ingredients will be staples in your fridge & cabinets.

A few ideas:

• /r/EatCheapAndHealthy/top/
  
• /r/7dollardinners/top/
  
• /r/budgetfood/top/
  
• /r/collegecooking/top/
  
• https://www.reddit.com/r/Fitness/comments/336mmw/how_can_i_eat_clean_and_healthy_on_a_limited/
  
  On a related tangent, these are some sources that massively improved my cooking abilities. They might be useful to you, since you mention staying out of the kitchen.
  
  
• How to Cook Without a Book covers basic techniques followed by several recipe variations using the technique. There's a chapter on vegetable puree soups talking about rough volumes and techniques, followed by potato leek soup, broccoli cheese soup, and several others. It lets me stare at the fridge for a minute or two, then start grabbing our random ingredients to throw together. If you're cooking with staples instead of cooking to a recipe, this is a vital skill.
  
• Good Eats by Alton Brown, some of which are on Netflix. They're great 20 minute shows on a wide variety of topics that get into the science behind cooking at a high level. Really helpful for understanding the reasons behind recipe steps.
  
• Serious Eats is my current go-to cooking and recipe site. Any time I want to make a specific thing, I check to see if they covered it first.

Sounded like you were overwhelmed. Don't worry, you'll get it all done. And don't feel bad poking family and friends for help sometimes, just offer food or beer and watch 5 people move things in one single run. Moving is stressful and the cleaning willl get done eventually. Although flushing the sink and the fridge seals (which no one ever cleans) are the best first ideas.

Also grocery bag holders I mean these things. Around 5$ each. The first has a keychain hole and I'd just attach them to a bag. It saves your palms when walking groceries home for 25 minutes.

If your laundry is in the basement I'd also go grab the easiest to carry laundry baskets, probably tall plastic reinforced handle or generic wide low one.

Good luck with nursing school!! Luckily once your an RN you'll get paid enough you could have someone else clean if you needed.

This is a bad idea. It will seem ridiculous and socially inappropriate. At best, people will simply be a little confused and weirded out; and at worst, people will be insulted.

If you handed one to me, I would not want to take it. If you insisted, I would feel uncomfortable, and absolutely never ever 'cash it in' under any circumstances. I'd go home to my wife and say, "you know that guy /u/probably_bad_idea? He gave me this weird coin today. You ever hear of anything like that?"

Here's why: the give-and-take of favors is part of what creates trust between business associates. Commodifying the process, which is what you are explicitly doing, ruins that element of interaction. Whether or not this is actually true, it implies that you only do favors for others to earn favors in return, and expect that the people you interact with share the same worldview. It says, "I assume you're only doing this favor for me to get one in return, so I went to the trouble of making you this coin."

Another downside is, it's very impersonal. No mention of what they did or why it was helpful; just a grubby poker chip identical to what some other girl got.

[Edit to add: a third downside is the implication that you wouldn't remember what they did later on. "Hey, thanks for the favor. I won't remember it tomorrow, so here's a special coin you can cash in to remind me."

A fourth downside is the implication that you wouldn't have helped them out beforehand, but now that you owe them a favor, you will help them out once. "Hey, now that you've done me a favor, I've decided to offer you one in the future if you need it." That's not literally what you mean, but it is the implication.]

The adult thing to do would be to send a simple email. If you really want to send a special message, you could hand-write a short note instead. (Perhaps put some of your coin-designing budget toward buying some tasteful stationary like this).

In either case, here's what the note should say, in three or four sentences:

• Thesis
  
• Evidence / Complement
  
• General Offer (optional)
  
  For example:
  Thanks for bailing me out on those TPS reports today. Without your perfectly color-coded spreadsheets, I never would have gotten the reports to the client on time. If you ever need a hand collating widgets (or anything else), just let me know. Best,

It's a great start to say you don't want to do to your kid what your parents did to you. It's time to take the next step and start filling your parent tool belt with what you want to do as a parent. If your only reference point is what doesn't work, you'll have a hard time making good parenting choices. You don't have to figure out the good tools on your own. There are tons of resources for parenting advice. Personally, I'd recommend looking at Danny Silk. It's framed as "Christian" parenting advice, but the essentials are solid and I use them every day.

Source: I'm a real life parent with three kids. I had a stable upbringing, but when I had kids of my own, I didn't have a good reference point for how to parent. Finding good resources and practicing the tools radically changed my relationship with my kids for the better. We will all be different and better for decades to come, both individually and as a family.