(Part 3) Best products from r/needadvice

Just a heads up, my suggestion is going to be double the upper end of your budget. I'll give you my reasoning for it though, but TL;DR: I own them and love them.

These are made by Shure. I absolutely love them. I have had them for a few years now (3 going on 4). The sound quality is a huge step up from the earbuds that come with an iPod, and when paired with triple flange sleeves they block out an incredible amount of sound. They are also great for running and working out because they literally will not fall out of your ear.

Why would I would suggest paying 100 dollars for these? They last. If they break, Shure is a great company with really great customer service. I've returned older models to them on a few occasions, and each time they have sent me brand new earphones, not refurbished, but brand new, in retail packaging earphones. If they are out of warranty and Shure won't replace them, the cable is detachable and can be swapped out for pretty cheap (20 dollars or so). So lets say you buy a new pair of earphones every six months, which isn't too unreasonable. That's 40 dollars a year- in two and a half, you're breaking even with a pair of Shures. Getting 2.5 years out of them isn't unreasonable either. Add in how much better the sound quality is and I really think it's a good deal. Like I've said, I've had mine for going on four now and haven't had any problems with them yet.

> In order to bring in enough money to live, I'd probably have to advertise […]

My main point is that word-of-mouth can be very powerful, viral advertising. I highly recommend reading The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell.

> […] and work with unknown clients. That's when things get stressful and annoying.

My secondary point is that if you're aquiring clients through closer connections such as friends, friends of friends, or even friends of friends of friends, yes, they will be progressively more "unknown" and "untrustworthy" but it's still (in my opinion) the best method of finding the most trustworthy first.

What have you got to lose? Not much, when you consider the flexible time schedule. That is, start with a full-time job supporting you financially, and do freelance work in your (little) free time until you reach a point where you can support yourself with a part-time job plus freelancing. From there you can try progressing to supporting yourself mostly or fully with freelance work.

> That's when things get stressful and annoying.

So, your present job is neither stressful nor annoying?

I'm going to try to be honest with you, and I hope it doesn't come off as offensive, because my intention is to give you some ideas for a path forward.

You seem smart enough to recognize that a lot of the things society does are superficial, and this is true. Society is full of behavior and activity that doesn't mean anything, or that serves to obscure people's true motivations or thoughts. Many people are concerned with their immediate physical comfort or social status, which leads to a lot of shallow interactions.

Partly this is just for efficiency's sake, if everyone sat around discussing their deepest inner desires and the profound nature of reality, nothing would ever get done. We need to be friendly to strangers because we don't have time to form a meaningful relationship with everyone around us. It's a simple, social fiction that makes life easier in large population centers.

I don't know how old you are, but I get the impression that you're fairly young. At the stage in your life where you're starting to recognize the silly-seeming things that humans do, but not experienced enough to understand that most of it is necessary "theater" for being a functioning part of human civilization.

I think you would probably benefit from reading some good philosophy books. You aren't the first person to grapple with these ideas, a lot of very smart people over the last three thousand or so years have spent a lot of time thinking about the same things. You might find a connection with Stoicism, and a fairly popular book called A Guide to the Good Life is a pretty solid introduction.

A footstool + cushion to keep the leg raised while sat down.

Compression socks (she might be given these by the hospital) to reduce the chance of blood clots.

She’ll also likely be given crutches but you can buy more comfortable ones online.

Also she’ll need help if she has stairs.

There’s a kind of frame you can get to place around the toilet. It’s a bit like a Zimmer frame - handles designed to help take their weight when sitting down/standing up.

A long handled grabber https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0076VM39W/

Heat/cool gel pack to help reduce initial swelling.

Kindle/iPad/phone and chargers and plug socket nearby. Basically, something to keep her mind off her knee as much as possible.

Make sure she starts the exercises as soon as possible after the op - and sticks to them. The people who have the best outcomes after a knee replacement are the ones who make the effort to keep it up. This is important. Failing to do the exercises can put the recovery at risk.

Good luck to her. I’m sure she will be just fine. It’s such a common procedure these days.

I have ADD too but mine has become almost unobtrusive. I can even take advantage of it now, like for example, obviating shit and details and focusing on the nitty gritty to get things done. I've used Aderall, it does help lots and if you can by all means use it; however, myself and other people I've met have ceased to need the meds as bad as we once needed to. It has to do with self management, something you will learn the bad way if you hit rock fucking bottom in everything like I did.

Please, don't wait until you hit rock bottom and life jolts you awake. You could be close to losing all your college opportunities, losing your friends and your fiancee. You have to toughen up by becoming responsible of yourself and your ADD.

It's good you already started. Keep going to counseling, get a prescription for the meds and read on ADD as much as you can. There are really helpful books on the subject such as this one. Here's a hint, the way to manage ADD is through establishing reliable systems that get things done for you, like for example, study three hours every day at the same time, attend all your classes, implement something that works for you so you won't forget things, like a GTD software, maintaining clean spaces, asking lots of questions in conversations to keep yourself engaged, keeping lists of things, storing boxes, detailed notes, that sort of things. Once you find systems that work for you, you stick and follow through them regardless of how you feel and things will get taken care of and surprisingly, you'll have more time available to do the things you want, be it sleep or whatever; otherwise, if left to whim, everything spirals out of control and becomes unmanageable and it drags you down with it. Good luck!

I think you should read this book or at least take a few lessons from it.

http://www.amazon.com/Opposable-Mind-Successful-Integrative-Thinking/dp/1422118924

This does not have to be an either-or situation for you. Living your own life does not mean you are neglecting or have to neglect your parents. If your mother relies on your constant presence in her life to be fulfilled, then that is something she needs to work on. It is not your problem to solve. What I mean is you can't solve that for her. If you weren't in the picture- If she never had a child or you died, she would still have these problems, right?? You cannot fix what is not yours to fix.

As for the moral obligation to take care of your folks, why not consider changing the name you call that- Not to push a biblical term on you, but why not try honoring them rather than take care of them? You can do a lot of things in your daily life to bring honor to your parents names and the love and encouragement they showed you. Moreover, you can provide/help them make provisions for their care and needs. There are people in their community who can help them. However, your parents have to meet you halfway or else it won't work.

Also- You might move far away and decide you hate it. Moving does not have to be a permanent situation.

Good luck to you and realize you are so lucky to have parents that you care about and who cared enough for you to make you feel this way. Not all of us do.

Okay few ideas to lower your energy bills...

1. Programmable thermostats. Ideally intelligent ones. Nest is a good choice but it's expensive. Alternatively get any Z-Wave thermostat and a Vera Lite controller (you can do ALL KINDS of cool shit with that thing, I highly recommend it). This lets you stop wasting energy heating/cooling an empty house.
   
   
2. Make sure your system is efficient. Replace the filters, clean the coils, etc.
   
   
3. Look for leaks. Find a day it's especially cold, and make yourself a fan door. Have the fan blow out and go around in your house near windows and whatever looking for leaks. Seal that shit up with foam insulation tape.
   
   
4. Air conditioners can bleed heat. Wrap them with insulating covers in the winter.
   
   
5. Your dryer is your frienemy. If you have a clothes dryer, it is a great source of hot, humid air. In the winter, it's vent should go into a filter box so you save that air inside your apartment. In the summer, it should blow outside.
   
   
6. Change your light bulbs out for CFL or LED bulbs. CFLs use less than 1/3 the power of incandescent, and LEDs are even better. This adds up over time.
   
   
7. If you have a big fancy desktop computer, use the power management function or turn it off. Don't leave it running 24/7. On the other hand, during the winter, fire that shit up and have it mine Bitcoins or something. At least that way your heat makes you a bit of money :)
   
   
8. Use your windows/blinds. This can reduce both your lighting and heating costs. Note that dark colored blinds absorb more light/heat than white blinds. So use dark in the winter, white in the summer.
   
   
9. Use the climate to your advantage. In the summer time, if it gets cool at night, shut off the AC, open your windows, and run a fan.
   
   
10. Use humidity to your advantage. A humidifier uses a lot less power than a heater, but increasing the humidity to 35-40° in the winter will make it feel a couple degrees warmer than it is. Similarly, a dehumidifier uses less power than an air conditioner, but makes it feel cooler. Note however that an air conditioner dehumidifies the air, so don't run both AC and dehumidifier at once.
    
    
11. Use correctly sized air conditioner units. As air passes through an AC, it gets dehumidified as well as cooled. If your AC is too big, it will run for a very short time and then shut off, leaving most of the air not dehumidified so it will feel soggy inside. If your AC is too small, it will run continually and the place will still be hot (or it won't cool down at a useful speed). Before buying ACs, calculate your room volume and figure out exactly what BTU rating you need.
    
    

North Dakota has jobs but the cost of living is super high. But if he got a welding diploma first...

Use Dave's ESL Cafe to find TESL jobs for you and your boyfriend and go to Korea and teach english or Thailand or China?

What if your boyfriend used his savings for a coding bootcamp and then he could get a job after the short bootcamp?


http://www.jjluna.com/Books

http://www.amazon.com/Living-Well-Practically-Nothing-Revised/dp/1581602820

http://blogs.marketwatch.com/capitolreport/2014/08/18/north-dakota-leads-country-on-jobs-growth-labor-department/

http://profoundlydisconnected.com/shop/

http://www.amazon.com/Timely-Profitable-Help-Troubled-Americans/dp/0930294149

Join the military?

Try car sales in Philadelphia just to get the experience of selling and be doing something, even if it is commission only, say at a Toyota dealership?

What about going to Oaksterdam and learning about cannabis, and then going to Colorado and trying to get into the medical cannabis industry?

What about just taking out loan money and going to college? If you have a degree already, pick another area?

Say you wanted to learn about Chinese medicine and acupuncture at Bastyr University. Well, Kenmore is outside of Seattle, and the economy in Washington is strong. So you could go there and go to school, and also get acclimated to the area, and go from there?

How much stuff, material possessions, do you have there? Children? Other family members?

I don't know; you write that you want to move across country but a job is a problem. So move across country as a student first, and then make contacts in the new area and get new skills and then get a job or start a business. Or move first, and read the books that I recommended, and do flea market sales or other ideas like that in your new town. I tried to help. Good luck.

Hey Paul,

Happy early birthday! I'm a Capricorn too, and this feels very Capricorn to plan ahead like you're doing.

I wouldn't worry about the B:G ratio, as long as you have some fun and friendly people in the mix you guys will have a great time. Be sure to have little snack/food or drink stations for people to mingle and mix.

Have you considered playing games? My friends and I are obsessed with this game One Night Ultimate Werewolf: https://www.amazon.com/Bezier-Games-ONUWBEZ-Ultimate-Werewolf/dp/B00HS7GG5G. It's kind of like mafia where you have to find and kill the werewolf in the mix - essentially it's a game where you lie to your friends.

Also if you have an xbox or Apple TV, the Jackbox Game set: http://jackboxgames.com/ is awesome. There's a mix of different games where people use their phones/ipad/whatever to submit answers so nobody has to be the point person to organize the game. I've started crying from laughing so hard at this game because people's personalities can really show through.

The goal of a party is for people to have fun / get to know each other so encourage (but don't force) fun interactions.

I own this lamp, which has some great features.

https://www.amazon.com/TaoTronics-Eye-caring-Dimmable-Charging-Control/dp/B0197ZOAKE/ref=pd_yo_rr_bia_t_2?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=BVYDDDP8VJSAQS38AXPX

The LEDs are long-lasting, fully dimmable, and can change color from pure white to a soft yellow. There's also a USB port built into the lamp so you can change a device from the lamp itself. Finally, the whole thing is on a swinging arm that can pivot and rotate however you want. After looking at several lamps that were similar to this one, I think this is the best of the bunch. So I bought it and I love it. It's a great lamp, definitely worth the price!!

You can point it at the wall in order to get a diffuse light across the whole room...or point it directly at your table for when you're working on something intricate like writing or crafting.

Also, here's a cool link to some higher end stuff: https://www.reddit.com/r/malelivingspace/comments/6tfgkq/ideas_for_lighting_in_gaming_room/

Here's a thread where people talk about LED bulbs: https://www.reddit.com/r/malelivingspace/comments/460tun/led_white_light_vs_more_traditional_warm_lighting/

This would really depend on your tastes.

I like to recommend The Dresden Files. The link goes to the first book in the series, and the first chapter is available on that page to see if it is something you might enjoy.

Also I liked The Golden Compass. Don't dismiss this book because it is for young readers anymore than you would dismiss a pixar movie. They are still enjoyable for adults, a good story is a good story.

If the fantasy stories aren't your thing, Hunt for the Red October is a fun read. It is also the gateway to a bunch of other novels from Tom Clancy. These are more suspenseful/action driven stories.

My preferences are mostly in the direction of Sci-Fi and Fantasy, so if you would like more things along that path I'd be happy to offer more suggestions.

It's a broad field, but I think "How Computers Work" by Ron White would be a great starting point to get the core concepts down:
https://www.amazon.com/How-Computers-Work-9th-White/dp/0789736136

I'm happy you want to get involved with computers, they truly are more amazing the more you learn about them. Let me know if I can help.

You've mentioned riding a bike; may I recommend the unicycle?

It's a bit hard getting started, but once you start figuring it out, it feels GREAT.

The big reason that I mention it, though, is that it's something you can do alone that is also a way to meet people - if you want it to be. Someone gives you shit, and you can smile at them and not say anything - you're on a unicycle, what are they going to do about it? Someone thinks you're awesome, but you don't feel like stopping to talk.. so don't! You're on a unicycle!

It's also a pretty good workout, and way more fun than running. And it's cheap to get started - I've bought two on Craigslist, and paid 50-75 each time; even a new one isn't that much, at 120 or so bucks.

It's actually surprisingly hard to hurt yourself (no fall will be worse than stepping onto a stair when you thought you'd be stepping on the floor when descending, unless you tangle your feet up in the pedals, which you get a feel for pretty quick).

TLDR: Ride a unicycle, thank me later.

This got a bit longer than I meant so I'll apologize now. But the first thing I'm going to say is fuck bitches. Get money.

Someone wants to lie about you? That's on them. You do you. It's cliched bullshit but honestly you can't control other people. There are things you can control, but you're giving all that power away for absolutely free to people you're not sure even like you or want you in their social lives.

So just ignore all of that bullshit. People will figure out what's up if you're honest with yourself and honest with them. Don't try to put yourself up in anyone's eyes and don't let anyone put you down. Just be.

That doesn't actually fix anything. You can fix it though.

Changing in place is more difficult than starting over. But it's a longer lasting thing. If you get a new job, you'll go in like a fireball, you'll be on top of all of your shit.

For a while, at least. And then six months later there's an explosion, and it all falls apart.

I want you to do three things. Some of them cost a minimal amount of money, but not much. If you stick with it, I promise in six months you'll be feeling better instead of falling apart.

I'm not being shitty, but I want you to picture yourself six months from now. Where you're headed. What's likely to happen. And I want you to imagine a different you that is powerful and in control.

And no I'm not talking about sobriety or Jesus. But that's the second time I've mentioned control, and it's going to come up several more times.

This doesn't mean everything's sunshine and roses all the time. It means that all those little strings that attach you to the stress in your life, that pull you in every direction, those ties are anchored a few inches away instead of inside you.

You're safe inside a little bubble where you have control of the things that matter.

The first thing I want you to do , and the most expensive, is go into a CVS or a Rite-Aid or whatever pharmacy you have nearby or just go on Amazon and get one of those little compartment things for pills that old people use.

And when you get pot I want you to put a bowl-pack in 13 of those. This is the first test, and the most difficult. This is the part where you control your actions.

Those bowl-packs are for every day between pays. You get one, and only one. It's not enough to get fucked up. That's not the point. It's purely therapeutic. (And when I explain the rest of my plan, you'll see how powerful this act really becomes.) Whatever's left over after you set that aside is for you to go to town on. If it lasts, it lasts. If it doesn't.. don't fuck around with what you have set aside.

The second thing I want you to do is get a rubber band, the big ones like a bunch of rolls of quarters sometimes have around them from the bank. I want you to wear this on your wrist. When you feel yourself starting to lose control, I want you to take action instead of letting it flow.

I want you to snap the band on the outside of your wrist. You'll bruise the hell out of yourself if you sting the inside, but a little snap on the outside won't hurt you. But it will bring you fully and 100% into the moment.

I want you to snap the rubber band and take just a second to remember that no matter what happens.... even if the place burns down... you have a bowl-pack waiting for you at home. And no matter what, eventually you will be there, you will be packing that bowl and you will smoke it. And then you can do whatever it is you enjoy doing. This is the part where you control your emotions.

The final thing I want you to do is to change your focus. I'm sure there are several metrics that they grade you on, and I'm sure there's a lot of stress involved with those numbers. Fuck all that.

You're getting $9 an hour, and they're not going to fire you. All they're going to do is drag you aside while you nod and smile, and then you do whatever you do.

So instead of getting pissed off about those numbers I want you to focus 100% of your energy on customer satisfaction. Every action you take, every decision you make, I want your goal to be a smiling customer at the end of the transaction.

This is controlling your environment. Happy people make people happy. And if someone doesn't want to be happy, well fuck them. You have your plans set in stone, because of decisions you made that no one but you can affect.

Remember that bubble. Imagine everything in your life that affects you, attach a string to it and give it a different color. And I'd bet you a bag that even after I mentioned the bubble before and just now, you still imagine those things going straight to your heart.

You need to change that. The first step is taking things into your own hands.

I feel ya, man. My girlfriend is in the midst of getting her MFA in graphic design and industrial design. I have little experience/interest in design outside of what I know from her. Here are some things I've bought her in the past that have gone over well:

The New Typography, by Jan Tschichold I guess it's an amazing book. I didn't read it myself, but she loved it.

Pantone coffee mug I happened to know that 186C is my girlfriend's favorite color, so I got her that specific mug.

pantone umbrella this site appears to be out of stock, but they're pretty nice umbrellas.

Veer has some decent typography/graphic design shirts.

This Ring was a big winner. It's also dirt cheap at $12.

If you need more ideas I can probably come up with some. I think this is a good start, though.

Hey man, first of I want to say I'm not a doctor, I've haven't researched what Im about to mention and I could be completely wrong.

But, although I haven't heard of anything that can reverse Alzheimer's I have heard from multiple sources some things that can slow down its progression.

The thing I've heard about most is MCT oil, this a concentration form of coconut oil, taken daily can apparently slow down the development of Alzheimer's and one person even claimed it stabilised her husbands condition (meaning it wasn't progressing at noticeable rate anymore atleast in comparison to how it was previously).

The next thing would be to cut out gluten. I know this sounds like hippy bullshit and it may well be but its pretty much accepted now that Alzheimer's is basically 'type 3 diabetes' and is influenced by diet (not implying that it is 'caused' by diet but that diet can certainly exacerbate it and make you more likely to develop it if your already susceptible).

One book that I have recently read that talks extensively about it (also listing many studies which many be of interest to you) is a book called Grain Brain.

Normally I would be very hesitant to even mention things like this as I haven't researched the topic extensively but if I was in your position I would probably want to explore all avenues and its in my humble opinion that this area might be worth a week of your time to look into.

I wish you and your family all the best man.