(Part 2) Best products from r/ptsd

Depends on what kind of recovery you're talking but I've also read:

• The Drama of Being a Child (and other stuff by Alice Miller but if you wanna read just the one, this is it)
  
• Codependent No More which was super helpful to me
  
• The Courage to Heal (controversial but I found it just fine)
  
• [The Sexual Healing Journey] (https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/0062130730/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o07_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1) (there's exercises!)
  
• Come as You Are (not focused on trauma but does talk about it, the author also has a blog where you can read some of her stuff and see if you want the book)
  
  I've also heard good things about Pete Walker's book(s?) but iirc they were too expensive for me. He also has a blog though (as ugly as it is)! I also found Objects Relations theory interesting but it's not very accessible.
  
  These are a bit miscellaneous but I hope you can find something helpful among them.
  
  EDIT: expensive not expansive!

I wish my loved ones would have read the Body Keeps the Score and When Someone You Love Suffers from Post Traumatic Stress

I hope he gets back into therapy - finding good professionals is difficult. But therapy is only 1/4 the solution. A significant 1/4 you can provide is strong social support with unconditional love. He needs to a) know he is lovable and b) know he has a connection or a tether to his "reality"

Self-soothing is one of those things where there's a big bag of tricks, but you've gotta try a whole bunch of them to find what works for you. Some of them are not very good (substance use, self harm) but here are some good ones that work for me:

• Draw, even if you're like me and have very little artistic talent. Talent doesn't matter, art can be therapeutic. Or get one of those adult coloring books and some colored pencils and absorb yourself in coloring animals/geometric shapes/whatever.
  
• Find some music that's so immersive you've got no choice but to lose yourself in it. For me, that's Miles Davis' "Moon Dreams" and Yo Yo Ma's cover of Ennio Morricone's "Ecstasy of Gold". YMMV but when those are on, I can't do anything except concentrate on the music.
  
• Go for a bike ride. Maybe not if you're feeling impulsive, but I find for me it's easy to lose myself in the rhythm of the pedals. And if I'm feeling self-harmy then at least I can get that pain constructive sense of pedaling really fast/far and building my leg muscles.
  
• Try doing the sensory grounding technique where you regulate your breathing, and with each breath you work your way through five things you can see, four you can hear, three you can touch, two you smell, one you taste. You can mix the numbers/senses around if you like. I know it sounds dopey as hell -- the therapist that recommended this to me said as much when he told me about it -- but it works.
  
• Rub your forearms or tops of your thighs (or wherever might feel tight/achey/like you want to hurt) with bengay or vaporub or whatever. The smell is strong enough to be grounding/break you out of a bad mindset, the heating/cooling sensation helps with that too, and the deep pressure of rubbing makes the muscles feel better.
  
  Also, check out Kate Bornstein's book "Hello, Cruel World: 101 Alternatives to Suicide for Teens, Freaks, and Other Outlaws". Not saying you're a freak or an outlaw (or a teen, prob) or that this is a suicide, thing, but I've found that book pretty helpful in a variety of circumstances. I know my local library has a copy, yours may too.
  
  Anyway, my sympathies regarding your dad and the trouble with your husband. And congratulations on recognizing this as a good opportunity to work on self-soothing, you're right. All the best :)

Try the ice cube trick if the anxiety ever hits and you have a drink handy. I just hold an ice cube in my left hand until it melts. Can still shake hands and everything but the ice cube seems to force my heart to slow down a bit. My best guess is that it triggers the Mammalian Diving Reflex and turns off whatever is derailing.

That trick came from a Viet Nam Vet, has been a huge help as time has gone on.

As for things sticking around, now that I'm well into my 40's the flashbacks and nightmares seem to have slowed to almost nothing - though they can still get triggered by trauma anniversary and other surprises. I have one trauma around a car accident so anytime the brakes squeal behind me I get to have a fun day.

Totally agree that basic Meditation is necessary to get through, can't see it ever being accepted in the public school system here in the US though - hell some places refuse to teach Evolution.

I also think that Philosophy has helped me cope some - Epictetus and Marcus Aurelius have been incredibly helpful reading to sort of adjust the way I see the world these days. I highly recommend the two following books:

http://www.amazon.com/Enchiridion-Dover-Thrift-Editions-Epictetus/dp/0486433595
http://www.amazon.com/Meditations-Thrift-Editions-Marcus-Aurelius/dp/048629823X

Ah. I seriously hadn't even noticed you were the same guy. Some very impressive deductive skills right there, ha ha! But I'm very happy that we got off so much better in this thread actually.

And yeah, I'm a bit sorry it went sour like that as well. It's not like I was behaving terribly enlightened in that threat. It's good of you to be forgiving like that. Thanks:)

And no, for most people the symptoms of PTSD never entirely go away. In fact one of the things my therapist used to stress was exactly the point that the symptoms - in all likelihood - would stay, and that the main purpose of the therapy was helping me find good ways to deal with this fact.

And yes, meditating specifically before a social event is something I do as well. Sometimes it seems to do little difference, but at other times it has been extremely helpful.

Like recently, for instance, - when a friend visited and out of the blue told me about his brothers sudden death, which I didn't know about yet. It was heavy stuff, of course, and he cried and freaked out a bit. But having meditated before his arrival, although I was just expecting us to have a beer and listen to new records, - it made a ton of difference. This way, being more calm and centered, I could actually help and comfort him, - instead of just panicking myself.

For this, and many other reasons, I actually think that basic meditation skills (non-religious) should be be part of public schooling. Some scientific work seems to point to the fact that if children are taught basic self-awareness/mindfulness techniques, - if they later in life are subjected to traumatic events, the likelihood of them developing PTSD is A LOT smaller.

If interested in this sort of stuff (scientists trying to figure out how to make meditation part of Western school curriculae), this book served me as a good place to start - although it is a few years old already:

http://www.amazon.com/Destructive-Emotions-Scientific-Dialogue-Dalai/dp/0553381059/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1370433763&sr=8-2&keywords=negative+emotions

It can be done without a therapist, too. It's just that my explanation doesn't have all the details but books do. This is the book my therapist suggested me to read before EMDR: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Getting-Past-Your-Francine-Shapiro/dp/1609619951/ref=la_B001IZTCBY_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1411914435&sr=1-1

This was a great book with lots of real experiences inside. And it has exercises on how to practice and establish the safe place. You can find a pdf online as well. Hope it helps you. Therapy is expensive and my insurance doesn't cover it. It took me a couple of years to be able to set aside money for that :S

Speaking personally, dissociative anger and anxiety is a problem many of us have to deal with as a part of our disorder (C-PTSD for me) and for me it helps to be constantly aware of my own state of mind so I don't lash out at my SO (or worse, my kids) just because I'm having an episode or on the verge of one. Specifically, the technique that's helped me somewhat is "present minded non-judgemental awareness" which is useful to help get me out of my own head, which during an attack is thinking/feeling like I'm back in the place I was traumatized, and realize that I'm not there in that horrible place, I'm here in a safe environment and the things/people around me are not trying to hurt me.

You can find the specific technique in chapter 7 of the workbook "Unified Protocol for Transdiagnostic Treatment of Emotional Disorders" by David H. Barlow, et al. Since your SO is a vet, he should be able to get a copy, I would think, from the VA if he asks for it or if his therapist is willing to try it, but here's the Amazon link just in case.

It can't all be just you, he needs to work on things on his end, and you can help, which you already are just by being there for him. Patience is a must, obviously, you have to know that the anger is usually a reaction to the anxiety he feels because of his state of mind, it has nothing to do with you personally (it's dissociative, after all) so just keep remembering that and let him know that you know. Ask questions about how he's feeling, and that whatever he's feeling is OK and just listen, let him tell you and encourage him to tell you (provide some feedback if he needs it, but really just listen and be very careful not to judge or give the appearance of judgement). It'll help anchor him in the present, safe place that he's in rather than the dangerous scary place his traumatized mind thinks/feels he's in. That's what I tell my wife, anyway, and it's helped her to better help me.

Lastly, another sufferer posted on here a few weeks ago a "cheat sheet" he/she uses with their SO on things to do when an attack comes on. It's definitely helpful. Here's the link. Good luck to you I hope it helps you both in the healing.

I am no expert so feel free to disregard anything I have to say.

First, you are doing well. You seem to be able to understand that you are having a problem and that you need to do something to make it better. That is a good start.

Is it at all possible for you to get a dog? What works, works.

Is it at all possible for you to see a therapist regularly? If you are in school, they might have something for students. Maybe a local women's shelter has some leads for affordable mental health care. I'm only guessing that cost is the problem. I strongly advise trying to work something out there. What you are going through is very hard and help makes it easier.

From what I understand, it is going to get better but it will take a long time.

If you feel exposed sleeping in a room, do you have a big closet you could setup as your hiding hole? I'm not saying that is a great idea long term, but again, what works works and the key is to at least get by to give you time to get better. Make your living space one you can feel safe in. Maybe upgrading locks or adding a door bar would help.

http://www.amazon.com/Door-Bar-Pro-Model-36/dp/B00L78B5XK

If you are renting, the landlord might not like it. But that is a problem for future you to handle. Future you is tough and resourceful. If they bitch, tell them your therapist told you that you had to feel safe at home and they can take it out of your security deposit when you leave.

Hey there, sorry to hear about your accident and subsequent return of symptoms.

This book is geared toward clinicians, but it was the first one that came to mind. It may have some helpful information for your situation: http://www.amazon.com/The-Body-Bears-Burden-Dissociation/dp/0415641527 (check your local library for a copy, that is where I came across this originally)

I hope that this helps, and I wish you strength and support in your recovery!

> Peter Breggin has built a career on antipsychiatry. Yes, he's a psychiatrist; he's also a hired gun in legal cases as an expert witness blaming psychiatric medications and ECT. That doesn't mean he can't be right or can't have a point, but he has a definite objective and a lucrative six decade career on the line as a contrarian.

If that's the line of argument that is going to be pursued, ok, what was said is true. But you can also find psychiatrists with a lucrative career who at the time were pretty much in favor of the current treatments. If you go to the book "mad in america" on amazon.com,

https://www.amazon.com/Mad-America-Medicine-Enduring-Mistreatment/dp/0465020143/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1523327241&sr=1-1&keywords=mad+in+america

Then go to "look inside" , go to pg 265, starting with the heading "eye on the castle", you can see the example of a psychiatrist who made a lot of money working for the pharmaceutical industry and doing research that had some ethical problems and that helped the industry. The preview of this part of the book only shows up to pg. 268, but that at least shows some of the information in case someone is interested.

Yes, this is incredibly common in my trauma research.

I do this all the time. My brain is my worst enemy when I'm in a dark place.

"I hate myself."
"I am useless"
"I am stupid"
"Why am I alive!"

So, that is to say, I do understand. I completely get it.

I'd recommend a book, but if I am honest it takes a long time and a lot of work to make it better in my experience. I wish I knew of a thing that would help quickly and easily, but I don't.

http://www.amazon.com/Self-Compassion-Proven-Power-Being-Yourself/dp/0061733520/

That is the book. Self-compassion practice is always one of the top features of resilience that trauma researchers recommend for healing. Which is to say, this is a recommendation with some scientific backing, and the book does have lots of practical exercises. It's just slow, plodding work.

I have found Dare by Barry McDonagh to be very helpful with handling to body sensations. He explains that by focusing on the sensations or being afraid of them we can actually make them worse. His method claims to "cure" anxiety, which I haven't found to be the case with me, but it has certainly helped me to look at my physical symptoms in a new, lighter light. I hope you can find some relief!

EFT works beautifully for past emotional events. I have used it successfully on over a hundred clients (depression/suicidal tendencies only), so I cannot guarantee it will work with PTSD.

However, these links might help:

http://www.hgi.org.uk/resources/delve-our-extensive-library/anxiety-ptsd-and-trauma/ptsd-why-some-techniques-treating-it

https://www.eomega.org/article/tap-your-way-to-healing-ptsd-with-eft

https://www.amazon.com/EFT-PTSD-Emotional-Freedom-Techniques/dp/1604150408/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1483023404&sr=8-2&keywords=eft+ptsd

My pleasure :) since you already do yoga, also have a look at this one: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Overcoming-Trauma-Through-Yoga-Reclaiming/dp/1556439695/ref=mp_s_a_1_1 - it’s good. My favourite say is: if you’re tired, learn to rest, not to quit. Take care!

Art therapy has been my supplement to trauma therapy and it really, really helps. If I were you, I’d consider getting a second therapist or purchasing an art therapy book.

This is the workbook I’ve been using with my art therapist.

If you haven’t already, you ought to make an appointment with a psychiatrist who has experience with trauma. For reference (as someone with both complex PTSD and multiple acute traumas), I take neurontin as needed for hyper-vigilance, latuda for paranoia, trazodone for insomnia/nightmares, and lexapro as my main “PTSD drug”.

Best of luck! Don’t hesitate to message me if you have any questions on supplemental/alternative therapies. I’ve been doing all this shit for two years now and I’ve been (generally) pretty successful.

This one is what I take regularly, and like a lot:
https://www.amazon.com/Source-Naturals-Supplement-L-Theanine-Magnesium/dp/B000GFHPCU/ref=sr_1_4?crid=2PVJZKXXMN6C&keywords=theanine+serene+with+relora&qid=1574217620&sprefix=theanine+seren%2Caps%2C164&sr=8-4

In addition to the theanine, it has a number of other good supplements, including magnesium, which is great and many people are lacking it in their diets.

I used the one by Mary Beth Williams (older version of this one). I can certainly relate with your brain scaring you. Would exposure therapy help at all? I also found EMDR helpful at breaking up the memory chains and, as my counselor said it "sucked the venom out of the memories". Feel free to PM me anytime, and take care.