Reddit mentions of The Feminine Mistake: Are We Giving Up Too Much?

I have bad news, there is no right answer. No decision will be 100% satisfactory, and you will always second guess whatever you decide. But here are a few random points to consider:

-The money argument: Even if half your salary goes to pay for daycare, you have to consider other benefits: healthcare, 401K, etc. And then, you have to consider that you might get promotions/salary raises in the future. You are giving up career development by staying home. Also, depending on what your field is, you may not be able to take time off and go back years later, you could be considered obsolete. If you are, say, a school teacher, it may be easier to go back after a long absence, but if you are a web developer, for example, then you will have a tougher time getting hired.
-Support system: if you do go back to work, do you have family (or really good friends) in the area that can help out once in a while? How flexible is your husband’s job? Will he be able to take time off for: pediatrician appointments, school conferences, sick days, soccer practice, etc? It is not impossible, but much harder and painful to hold a job, if all these responsibilities fall on you alone with little help.

-The part-time issue: There is a trade-off for the flexibility you get with a part-time job and it is zero career advancement. You have to make peace with the fact that less qualified people than you will get the good projects, the recognition, and the promotions.

There are additional valid arguments for moms having a paid job. Read “The Femenine Mistake” and it will scare the pants out of you. This book was probably half the reason why I returned to work after my second kid was born. I worked for a few years part-time and full-time, but at the end of the day, I was missing my kids too much, I was miserable, so I said “Fuck the Feminine Mistake!” and decided to stay home. I’m not trying to persuade you one way or the other, I just want to point out that there are sacrifices either way. You just have to figure out which sacrifice you will feel more.

There's kinda a book for it. "The Feminine Mistake: Are We Giving Up Too Much?"

I read it awhile ago and it put me off the idea of marriage for a few years: http://www.amazon.com/The-Feminine-Mistake-Giving-Much/dp/1401303064/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top

I don't think feminism rejects the idea of women working at home and raising kids. I think a lot of 60s feminists tried to emphasize the value of traditional women's work, and change the way it was looked down on just because it was something that women did.

However, there are potential pitfalls to staying home out of the workforce for a long time.

I would highly recommend this book
The Feminine Mistake

The author tells about the problems that can occur for women who leave the workforce for most of their lives if for whatever reason they can't rely on income from their husband anymore.

The author recommends things like make sure you have retirement savings in your name, and keeping your skills and networking connections current through part time work or volunteering, to help you in case of any worst case scenario.

Best of luck with your decision making for the future, I am sure you will be a great mother!