Reddit mentions of Turning the Wheel of Truth: Commentary on the Buddha's First Teaching

Oh; I understand, I think -- wasn't your comment the one that simply said "Imagine if this person were yourself", before you edited it?

I did read that comment and took it in that sense: try to see it from her point of view. And yes, I do feel sympathy for her; it must really be horrible to be her; and I think she lacks the self-awareness to make any progress. She has gotten much worse over the years.

Yes, it was absolutely necessary to drop her; the amount of destruction was astounding (including family heirlooms, hand-made and antique gifts from dear dead friends, etc. that she threw away right off of my mantelpiece when I trusted her to cat-sit, and decades of careful work destroyed) -- and she still thinks everything she does is unimpeachable and that any hurt experienced by her victims is an unforgivable offense against her (and her verbal violence is unimaginably explosive). Yes she had to go. She might benefit from a situation where she is forced to take the medications she requires.

You, on the other hand, seem to have the self-awareness required to grow and to thrive.

BUT, that self-awareness need not be a source of self-hatred, in fact should help to lead you out of it! I suggest reading some Buddhist philosophy, or, best!: find online talks++ by Ajahn Sucitto (he wrote an excellent recent book too). Really, try a talk; pick one with an interesting title. Dude is worth your time. N.B.: in my opinion Buddhism is not a religion; rather, this guy Siddatha Gotama who they call "the Buddha" is one of the greatest cognitive psychologists who ever lived; he really understood how the mind works, how we mess ourselves up and where all dissatisfaction comes from. [I am a cognitive psychologist by day job.]

++ talks: (1) at his monastery, (2) elsewhere online (This guy had his wild exploratory youth, found himself meditating in Thailand, and now he's the Abbot at Cittaviveka in Chithurst, England. Very engaging guy.)