Reddit mentions of Ask and It Is Given: Learning to Manifest Your Desires (Law of Attraction Book 7)

To find self acceptance (I don't know that 'love' is the right word in my case) I had to stop comparing myself to others. I had to stop believing things like "Oh it would be easy to care about myself if I was this weight/had that kind of ass/made this much money/had that kind of lover". The only thing worth comparing yourself to is your past self. It was also about not beating myself up for past mistakes anymore. Whatever I did or didn't do was already decided. Reconciliation was a big one as well. If I felt I did something very wrong to someone, I called or texted or emailed and I apologized to them. Their answer wasn't important, it was just a vehicle for moving on from the past.



I came from an abusive, poor household and I held that against my parents for years..and occasionally I have days where I still want to blame all my problems on their poor parenting. I had a come to Jesus moment with my mother and father about why they decided to raise me that way. They were very frank and finally just said they were lost and hurting and had no idea how to care for themselves let alone raise children. They failed at being good parents, but not once did they wake up and say "hey it's a good day to fuck up my kids" ..they at least tried in their own way. That helped a lot to know it wasn't purposeful.

It's a little cliche, but a few books helped me as well.

The Four Agreeements by Don Miguel Ruiz good overview here



Ask and It Is Given by Abraham Hicks warning: a little on the woo woo side


As far as "true love" in the way people usually define it... heart racing, sweaty palms, sudden inexplicable loyalty and devotion to someone you barely know.. I've learned that it's closer to infatuation or obsession. It's a chemical/physical/evolutionary response and it's not a healthy thing. Being willing to do anything and everything including going to prison or dying for someone's love just isn't reasonable or responsible. I found myself in that kind of relationship and I put up with numerous abuses, risked getting STDs, quit a college I loved and moved across country with no money or plans, and eventually ended up divorced and bankrupt because of that person. Just running with 'in love' feelings will turn out poorly. Give yourself time to get over that chemical rush before deciding to commit to anything long term like living together or getting married. I wish I knew that one sooner.



For me, true love is built over time. It's loyalty and reciprocated feelings and having important life directions/goals in common. For example...I never want children, so I would have to be 110% confident that my long term/life partner type person felt the same way and wasn't going to change their minds. If they constantly flip flopped about important issues like that I'd know it wasn't going to work out for the ultimate long haul. It's knowing without a doubt that if I got fired and gained 20 pounds and aged 10 years in the same day that they would still want my company, and that if that situation was reversed I would still want theirs. It's beyond sex and attraction entirely for me. I can find sexy people to play with pretty much whenever I want. I may even find a few of those people fun to date (ie: go to movies, go out to eat, watch some netflix, laugh and share stories, have sex..then they go home to their own separate world) But the lifetime relationship is combining two (or three or however many) separate lives/worlds into one shared experience. It's also enough respect for each other to admit when perhaps your goals and plans no longer line up and it's time to move on. It doesn't mean that the love is any less, it just means that their goals have changed and it's no longer beneficial to have the same kind of relationship. In my experience people change over years and decades. It's well worth having a relationship based on the important things for years/a decade/more than to force a failing relationship to last forever.