Reddit mentions of Shaken Faith Syndrome: Strengthening One's Testimony in the Face of Criticism and Doubt

I like this approach. I may consider this.

What I've found is this, at the beginning of my apostasy, it caused a big cognitive dissonance for both myself and my wife. It was all we could talk about, it threatened us both. I decided the church wasn't for me and shared my concerns and findings with my wife. She listened but didn't really investigate objectively, she'd read what the church and apologists had to say about the issues and read this piece of garbage that her mom sent her but wouldn't lend any credence to any 'anti-Mormons'. That God awful book seemed to calm her and she dug in her heels further and doubled down. We started seeing a marriage counselor and are to the point that we both love each other and are both ok with where the other is spiritually.

My question is this, when (if ever) should I bring the issues back to the surface again?

The book you are most likely to receive is going to be Shaken Faith Syndrome, which is a purely ideological, victim-blaming and gaslighting obscurantist trash-heap which is not written for skeptics who have done actual in-depth research, but rather, as on faithful TBM reviewer puts it, "Lastly, it should be noted that this book is targeted at the lay member and is not intended as a scholarly thesis of all issues relating to an 'intellectual' apostasy".

However, if your bishop is more sophisticated or nuanced NOMish in his approach it might instead be The Crucible of Doubt by Fiona and Terryl Givens.

I struggle with this as well. I find that, in general, most people I encounter do not feel the need to think about things as much as I do. I can't help it. I just think about everything all the time and it doesn't ever stop.
For the logic of a lot of thing, I really recommend this book . It helps me understand so many specific issues better, and has an incredible set up to help strengthen faith in general. I found one of my favorite quotes in this book. I believe it was Joseph F Smith who said it, and I don't know it verbatim so forgive me for paraphrasing: it doesn't matter if you don't understand, agree with, or believe every single thing taught in the church. Anyone who relates to our core values & beliefs (Jesus Christ, the Savior, the Book of Mormon being the word of God, etc) is welcome.
That quote kept me from leaving the church at a time where there was much I didn't understand.

See https://www.amazon.com/Shaken-Faith-Syndrome-Strengthening-Testimony/dp/1893036146

My wife is still active and never had any interest in reading any of my "anti" books. But I did get her to read Suddenly Strangers by Brad and Chris Morin. She was interested in it because it's about relationships, and what it felt like to lose belief in the church and have to deal with the fallout from believing family and friends.

Though it's not the main focus of the book, they do go into some detail about the doctrinal and historical issues that led to their disaffection, so it's a good way to introduce some of these issues in a non-threatening way.

Another tack might be to ask her to read something from an apologetic perspective that nevertheless goes into all the details. The great service that apologists provide is that they substantiate a lot of claims that members often assume to be anti-Mormon lies. One of my favorite examples is this paper from FAIR. It basically says, "why yes, Joseph Smith did in fact marry women who were already married to other men, now let me explain why that shouldn't bother anyone..." To me, the apologetic spin is weak sauce compared to the acknowledgement that the anti-Mormon claim is rooted in fact.

A good book in this vein might be Michael Ash's Shaken Faith Syndrome. It's a pretty good introduction to the whole LDS apologist scene, and most people who venture into those waters don't come away very impressed.