(Part 3) Best products from r/ENFP

I plugged a few books a month ago over at our subreddit.

Please Understand Me II by David Keirsey – he is the one who introduce temperament theory (SP/SJ/NF/NT) and very easy to read, providing a good starting point to MBTI.

Personality Type: An Owner’s Manual by Lenore Thomson - Instead of going by the 16 sets of letters, this is a pure Jungian book to the MBTI. It is noted to take a few stabs at Keirsey and for filling itself with pop culture references known for its time.

Personality Types: Using the Enneagram for Self-Discovery, by Riso and Hudson – While I am not as much of a fan of the Enneagram as I am the MBTI, I still pull this book out on occasion. It is a nice, complete overview of it. What I like about it the most though is it breaks down the 9 types into 9 levels of mental health. When you go from peak to valley, it is like reading a personal psychological horror story. For that reason, I often use it when discussing psychological and personality disorders as it relates to personality typing. Speaking of which…

The New Personality Self-Portrait, by Oldham and Morris – If you have any interest whatsoever in the DSM-IV personality disorders, but don’t want to read the whole thing (of which the PDs are a very small portion), GET THIS BOOK. It is not just a brief summary of each, its main focus is to go in the opposite direction of my previous recommendation. It views each personality disorder as an (unhealthy) subset of a larger personality style – of which one might have several – and then ask the question, “What will _____ be like if they were more mentally healthy?” It turns each disorder on its head by doing that.

Neuroscience of Personality, by Dario Nardi – I just finished this book. It takes each of the cognitive functions and explains what exactly your brain is doing when using them. From that it shows how each personality type’s noggin works. And despite being a book on neurology, it is very easy and quick read compared to all the above books. But the price tag IMHO is a bit steep. There is a 90 minute YouTube video out there of the author giving a lecture if you search for it.

[This book] (https://www.amazon.com/Journey-Abandonment-Healing-Relationship-Beginning/dp/0425172287) might help.

Believe it or not, you are addicted to the strife. It's what makes you fall in love with someone and bond. You say the comments hurt you a lot and then in those small moments of connection your body releases so many chemicals to your brain that this surge is addictive.

You can heal it, and it takes a lot of effort. Good luck!

No worries. If I could recommend, read this https://www.amazon.com/Tao-Dating-Womans-Absolutely-Irresistible-ebook/dp/B003GAMXG0/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1479061084&sr=1-1&keywords=Tao+of+dating

I found it fantastic. I will remind you that just because you FEEL like that was your one sweet sugar doesn't mean you're right. Feelings aren't always actual realities. Otherwise we'd call them facts. There are tons of men (or women but without rereading I can't remember if you gave gender), another one will come along. And just because he felt right, I'll point out that he obviously wasn't. Timing needs to be right too.

Also, we all need work and validation. You're being unnecessarily hard on yourself. Listen to a much older ENFP. Granted I'm currently seeing somebody who just might not be that into me, waiting to talk to him to see if this is where I pull my train away from the station to move on to the next. And if so, I've just found the sweet sugar of the INFJ and may need to be in search of my own INFJ.

Great response! Active listening is so crux for us!

A pinch on the fringe of your point, but I recently read a book that may help OP (and was fun to read as an ENFP): Nobody understands you and what to do about it by Heidi Halvorson No One Understands You and What to Do About It https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00O92Q6D0/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_HzTmzbBZSXPF4

Honestly, it was a ridiculously good read for this sort of interaction problem (50 gallon buckets)

You need to read The Gift of Fear. It explains all about how we pick up subconscious clues that add up to those feelings. ENFP just happen to be really good at it. Plus, we're super curious about people so we ask a lot of questions and that can lead to answers that just don't quite jive. Add enough of those to the little things and we get bad vibes.

I have found the enneagram to be orthogonal to any other personality theory out there. I'm a 4, myself, though I've known a lot of ENFPs who are other numbers, and a lot of 4's who are other MBTI types.

As a way of understanding myself, I have found the enneagram to be much more effective than the MBTI or any other personality typology. It was developed by Sufi mystics as a way of helping people find God, so it's going to be a little different from personality typologies that are looking to deconstruct a person's central tendencies in a scientific way. My understanding of the enneagram comes from Fr. Richard Rohr's [Discovering the Enneagram] (http://smile.amazon.com/Discovering-Enneagram-Ancient-Spiritual-Journey/dp/0824511859/), for whatever that's worth.

Looks like this! I've never been too daring with my looks 😂. What's the reaction you get from the public or friends?

Absolutely :). Here you go. They have two flavors, one that follows the calendar year and another that is undated, I'd suggest going with the latter as we are already in September. Wish you the best!

And Then I Thought I Was a Fish

Awesome book :)

> talktomeinkorean.com

I will definitely check out this site. Have you used other books/programs? My dad got me Rosetta Stone Korean for Xmas one year. I have been on and off again doing the lessons. I also read a Korean for Beginners book, which was a really good introduction and summary of things. Lots of different insights, slightly overwhelming, but at the same time, just enough to spark interest.

you should definitely check out his books! still life with woodpecker is a good place to start if you find the time.

Honestly, I'm not sure about this particular test. The one in this book is much better. https://www.amazon.com/Attached-Attachment-Find-Keep-Love-Find-ebook/dp/B0049H9AVU/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?keywords=attached+the+new+science+of+adult+attachment&qid=1564753943&s=gateway&sprefix=attached&sr=8-1

https://www.amazon.com/Birth-Order-Book-Why-You/dp/0800734068

I believe this is it. Happy reading!!

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If you /u/blueishwings or /u/bulbabutt find this stuff interesting, understand that Joseph Campbell the author of the hero with a thousand faces is a scholar that studied comparative religions, comparative stories, and comparative mythologies / aesop fables, etc.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Hero_with_a_Thousand_Faces

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hero%27s_journey

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Campbell

Joseph Campbell is also one of the big editors / summaries of Carl Jung (MBTI is not Carl Jung, but MBTI is based off Carl Jung's theories) in fact one of the most famous Carl Jung works is the essays that Joseph Campbell assembled various Jung essays and put them into one work known as The Portable Jung

https://www.amazon.com/Portable-Jung-Library/dp/0140150706

According to George Lucas the most influential work on Star Wars was The Hero with A Thousand Faces. If you look at the ROTJ Emperor and Vader vs Luke scene that is a perfect example of the transcendent hero that has mastered all aspects of the psyche ("You failed your highness, I am a Jedi like my father before me.")

The Joseph Campbell stuff was so influential on Lucas he allowed PBS during their making of a documentary series explaining Joseph Campbell work known as The Power of Myth https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Power_of_Myth Which is 6 interviews between Joseph Campbell and Bill Moyers. Bill Moyers actually died after the interviews were filmed but prior to the documentary being aired on PBS. Note in the various vhs and dvd releases the interviews with George Lucas with Bill Moyer and Leonard Maltin were trying to re-emulate the power of myth interviews with Joseph Campbell. ^(Bah I am getting side track) George Lucas is an extreme recluse (almost to the point of being a shutin), but during the filming of the Power of Myth he allows Joseph Campbell and Bill Moyers to do some of the filming at Starwalker Ranch in the 1980s.

I am a child who got the 1995 VHS trilogy box set of Star Wars before understanding what star wars was. I was 9 at the time. So I remember the movies but I also remember the Leonard Maltin interviews which I watched several times, even though most of the times I watched the movies at the age of 9 I fast forward through the interviews with Leonard Maltin and George Lucas.

 

 

 

Oh one of my favorite Gilmore Girl References, note there were multiple Power of Myth references in the Spring Break episode.

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/34/f2/d2/34f2d221d94d7902d4bb22f29bc6c4f6.jpg

http://foreveryoungadult.com/2013/11/13/the-gilmore-girls-rewatch-project-29/

It sounds like you're letting your predictions of the future desperately hurt your present. I would recommend this book:

http://www.amazon.com/Things-Might-Terribly-Horribly-Wrong/dp/1572247118/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1372307706&sr=8-1&keywords=things+might+go+terribly+horribly+wrong

I've been suffering with anxiety on and off the past few years, and this book helped me out immensely. Another great book to read and directly help out your situation would be this one:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/0451148452

I have the PDF for the second book, let me know if you would like it, and I can PM it to you.

You're welcome!

https://www.amazon.com/Tampopo-Ken-Watanabe/dp/6305154880

You get out of this by going to see a professional for help! I've had a lot of experience with depression and anxiety, and it is like I'm Jekyll and Hyde. Here's some books that really helped me, they're both modern evidence-based treatment approaches. These are approaches a trained therapist would likely use, espcially the cognitive-behavioral therapy. The first mindfulness & acceptance one was critical to my recovery, personally.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Mindfulness-Acceptance-Workbook-Depression/dp/1572245484/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1376695414&sr=8-1&keywords=act+depression

http://www.amazon.com/Cognitive-Behavioral-Workbook-Depression-Step-/dp/1608823806/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1376695451&sr=8-1&keywords=cognitive+behavioral+therapy+depression