Best products from r/socialanxiety

I'd like to add:

Vitamin D only comes naturally from UV rays hitting your skin, and so most people are deficient in it, causing unstable moods and a slew of other health issues. Many people are also deficient in vitamin K2, which helps your body use the Vitamin D that you have. Otherwise, taking too much Vitamin D can actually be a bad thing. Many people are also generally deficient in their Omegas (specifically omega 3).

Green Pastures makes some of the highest quality fish oils and essential oils. Their Cod Liver Oil/Butter Oil blend is an excellent start. The cod liver oil contains lots of all the essential omega fatty acids, AS WELL AS VITAMIN D, E, AND K, and the butter oil contains high amounts of the rare VITAMIN K2, which allows your body to use it. They also sell Skate Fish Oil, which is similar to the Cod Liver oil, but contains an even different array of nutrients. In my opinion, it would be best to take the cod liver oil/butter oil blend along with the skate fish oil. They also sell Infused Coconut Oil, which has organic virgin coconut oil infused with cod liver oil, butter oil, and skate fish oil, so you can get all 3 in one scoop. It does appear there is slightly less butter oil and skate fish oil in the infused coconut oil, but it would be a good start if you're not sure.

This Source Naturals B Vitamin is extremely good. Source Naturals is an excellent brand. NutriGold is also a generally great brand.

This Magnesium Taurate is extremely good. Magnesium is one of the most important elements in human function. It plays a role in so many functions, and has an anti-anxiety quality. Magnesium Taurate is an especially good one.

I'm starting a regimen of Cod Liver Oil, Butter Oil, Skate Fish Oil, and Magnesium Taurate right now, and I'm very optimistic about it. I feel that these are probably the nutrients I an many people are probably most deficient in. The only item I'd like to add in the future would be turmeric powder in green smoothies & THIS SUPER FOOD POWDER because it looks like one of the best, and it would help provide lots of hard to find nutrients from exotic plants that we don't usually get.

Just wanted to share this article and my thoughts because I feel that having a good base is important to make the rest easier! Most importantly, it's WITHIN YOUR CONTROL. Good luck everyone!

td:dr: I recommend eating cod liver oil, butter oil, skate fish oil, magnesium taurate, and possibly a b vitamin and a good superfood powder to help give you a great base for fighting anxiety and depression.

Edit: I've also found out that Iodine can be helpful for Thyroid function and is extremely helpful for anxiety according to my SA friend.

Putting yourself out there is probably the hardest part of all of this, and I think it's the most effective. Good work on that. Keep working at it. The extreme emotions will eventually calm down as you learn more about yourself and others.

That infatuation doesn't sound too healthy. Another SA trigger is a fear of rejection. This can lead to some of those extreme emotions when actual rejection does occur. I know dating is really personal, but try not to take it too personally, if that makes any sense. She wasn't into you. You were into her, and it would have been nice if that had worked out, but it didn't. It doesn't really make much sense to keep carrying those negative emotions around, right? What good are they doing you?

Now you're free to keep working on your SA. If you had shacked up with her, maybe you'd be resting on your laurels at a time where it'd be better for you to keep pushing yourself to grow.

Don't feel bad about getting compliments, dude! If they're complimenting you, they mean it sincerely. What were they saying about you? Saying you're handsome? Funny? Well-dressed? Charming? Whatever they were saying about you, it's true! Accept it! It sounds like you have some real strengths. Own them! It can make you feel so good!

Going by the concert thing, it sounds like you've made some progress recently. That's really great. Keep working hard.

This book has a great self-esteem building exercise that I think would benefit you. Basically you take the different aspects of your life (your physical appearance, your job, your interpersonal skills, etc.) and assess your strengths and weaknesses in those areas. It will give you an honest evaluation of what kind of person you actually are. What you're good at, what you need to work on, etc. I think this could help with the compliment thing most of all.

Your story is pretty similar to mine so I'll try to share some insights. I have ADHD too and isolated myself and retreated into video games when I was 13 to escape some family issues. (I'm 20 now.) I started to realize the importance of being social when I started college two years ago and have been working on recovery ever since.


First of all good on you for realizing that socializing and making connections is so important. Some folks never realize this and stay shut in for life. Wanting to get better is the first step to improving, so you're already on the right track. Give yourself a pat on the back.


Now I can't diagnose you with social anxiety or anything, only a professional can do that, but in the end, it's not all that important. Being diagnosed and having your problem given a name doesn't change the problem at all. Furthermore, not having a diagnosis doesn't make your issues less valid. They are valid, and they cause real hurt, and you deserve to get better. So I wouldn't worry too much about whether it's ADHD or social anxiety or depression as much as I would focus on working it.


I totally relate to feeling like your peers have greater social intelligence than you. And I used to be the same way with giving one or two word answers. It does get easier with practice, but you have to be patient and keep trying. I find it helpful to remember that whoever you're talking to you can't read your thoughts. They don't know what you see in your head, and they don't know what you're thinking. This is important because when you give tiny answers you're giving them just a tiny amount of information. You might know extra details or have more in depth thoughts that relate to your answer and give it more context and make it more understandable, but if you don't go ahead and mention them, the person you're talking to will never know. So what I'm saying is to start trying to give more detailed answers to questions. You might think, "Oh, they don't care to listen to me." If they didn't care, why would they ask? Another important thing is to ask questions in return after answering. "How's your courseload this semester?" "It's a little light, how's yours?" If you look up tips for making conversations, asking questions is going to be the first thing you read. It's probably the single most important thing you can learn.


I got a bit sidetracked there but going back to how you feel like others have higher social intelligence, and you describe your social ability as being so poor, it's pretty clear that you're having trouble with self-esteem, which is normally linked to depression iirc. Looking down when you walk is an indicator of that too. It might not seem like useful advice now, but dwelling on not being good at conversations is only going to make them harder. If you keep drilling it into your head that your inept at conversing with people then social interactions will continue to be difficult and anxiety provoking, because you'll continue to dread not doing well enough. It's kind of a cycle, telling yourself that you're bad at talking to people will make you more anxious when you do talk to people, inhibit your conversational ability, and thus give you more "evidence" of your lack of skill and reinforce your feelings. You're basically digging your own grave when you do that. Now I know you can't just go "hey! I'm the BEST at talking to people!" and fix it just like that, but it's incredibly useful to reflect on when you do well and feel good about that rather than dwell on doing poorly, even if your good moments seem incredibly tiny. Progress is progress. It takes a long time and I still feel self conscious about myself and my ability, but it does get better.


Anyway, I'd stop playing video games if you haven't yet. It might be hard but you'll come to realize that there's much better things to do with your time. Also, having trouble making eye contact and I'm not sure what you mean by struggling with body language but difficulty making eye contact and reading body language can be a sign of autism. Take that with a grain of salt though, I'm not a professional. A tip for eye contact I've heard countless times is to look at someone between their eyes, right above the nose. It's apparently indistinguishable from regular eye contact, but I don't have any experience doing it. Even with that tip in mind, you should practice holding it more than usual. It might feel weird and uncomfortable but if you're struggling to hold it chances are what duration feel weird are actually pretty normal for everyone else. Just remember to practice. If you're finding it hard to read body language, there's plenty of resources on that you can study from. I've heard good things about this book. There's way too much to say about body language and eye contact than I can type here.


As for other books, How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie is one the everyone recommends. I've read it and it's great, but just reading it won't help. You really gotta go out there and practice it, (true even if you don't read anything) and be willing to pay attention to what works and what doesn't, refine your approach as necessary, and make new discoveries for yourself. When you do that, you'll start to really understand what the book is saying, well after you read it the first time. Books are useful, but they can't plant the right state of mind into your head, that's something you need to figure out for yourself. It takes lots of time and attention, but that's what you need to do. And that's what everyone else has done, book or not, while you, to be frank, were busy playing video games. It will be worth it.


That's all I can think to say right now. Again, good job asking for help, and I wish for you nothing but the best. Good luck!

Thank you. You are kind! I will be happy to share with you some of the philosophers I have enjoyed. What I have enjoyed even more is listening to smart people critique these philosophers. They have a way of breaking down the difficult concepts in understandable ways. Go on YouTube and listen to a guy named Rick Roderick. He has 3 lecture series which introduce you to many of the most famous philosophers. I especially enjoy his critique of Nietzsche, Freud, Kierkegaard, Sartre, Habermas, and Hegel. There is a podcast called the Partially Examined Life which is full of really, really great philosophical discussions. One of my favorites is their critique of the movie "No Country For Old Men".

The bed I bought is off of Amazon, strangely, and it is awesome! I cannot recommend it will be as comfortable to you as it is to me. I am a very large framed dude and this one worked wonders for me.

https://www.amazon.com/Signature-Sleep-Independently-CertiPUR-US-Certified/dp/B004LQ1RJ2/ref=sr_1_1/155-2136574-5011300?ie=UTF8&qid=1485834529&sr=8-1&keywords=bed+mattress

It is available in many sizes, and very, very affordable. Again, I cannot promise you a good night sleep on it, but it is perfect for me.

Finally, for the science fiction reading I would suggest starting with the best SciFi book ever in my opinion: Ready Player One by Ernest Cline. It is just too good to put into words.

Enjoy your time on this Earth. Relax, friend. You will find your place. I promise.

Since you are a woman, you have the advantage of being the one who's being approached.I'm a 28 year old guy, who never had a girlfriend, because I was never able to approach girls. Imagine how I feel. At least now I'm working on that a little.Now, this might seem a little weird, but you might want to have a look at the book "Breaking The Habit Of Being Yourself" by Joe Dispenza.

https://www.amazon.com/Breaking-Habit-Being-Yourself-Create/dp/1401938094/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1549143573&sr=8-1&keywords=breaking+the+habit+of+being+yourself+by+joe+dispenza+new

I haven't read it in a while and I'm still not finished reading it, but it basically says we can re-wire our brain using positive self-talk / affirmations. For example: You are used to freeze up when someone talks to you and worrying. You could try practice self talk every day for 10 minutes, for example: "When a guy approaches me, I stay calm and focused." You have to hammer it into your subconscious until it becomes your default mode.You really have to keep saying the positive self-talk every day for at least 5 to 10 minutes. You might see changes after 2 to 3 weeks. If not, try a different affirmation.You will probably say: "I've been dealing with this shit for 10 years. I've tried stuff like that, you moron.", but that's okay. I just wanted to have mentioned it.

Just a week ago I started saying "I'll talk to at least one girl on each concert I attend." And guess what: In the last week I went to 2 concerts and talked to 2 girls. And I didn't even do it thinking:"Oh, I told myself to do it, so I have to do it." No, it just happened. My brain said it's the right thing to do. Of course there were the usual fights in my brain and all that, but in the end I won. Unfortunately, the girls weren't intereseted in me, but that's another story.

If I was able to approach girls with the help of positive self-talk, then you can learn to not freeze up when someone approaches you. Because it's much easier. ;-) You can do it!

​

You could also have a look at mindfulness meditation, but I'm sure you've already done that. Shuts up your mind, calms you down, living in the present moment, enjoying life etc. A brilliant thing./r/Mindfulness

Does SO still do something about his social anxiety? For example, is he still in therapy? That is really the best way he can improve his situation. And I would like to ask along with the other poster, does he still use various techniques or strategies to deal with his anxiety?

You could try to ask him to practice certain things with you that might reduce his anxiety, like meditation or some stuff from the improve your social skills site.

And I don't know how much you know about social anxiety, but it is incredibly helpful to be well read up on it, so I'll heartily recommend this book.

You're a great person helping him with his anxiety like this. Unfortunately there isn't a quick fix for social anxiety (though it can get a lot better in time). It's certainly annoying to have to come up with excuses for why he's not there. There's still a lot of stigma attached to social anxiety, unfortunately. I have only told one or two friends who I feel I can trust about my own anxiety. But I would love to get involved in raising awareness of social anxiety.

I got into Stoicism and it really helps with things like this. https://www.amazon.com/Art-Living-Classical-Happiness-Effectiveness/dp/0061286052/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1464729591&sr=8-1&keywords=art+of+living

It just really teaches that whole "Don't worry about things in the past, don't worry about things you can't control, don't worry about something that won't matter in a couple months".

But boy, did I do so many similar clueless things. It really makes me realize how low my self-worth was that I didn't put the effort into taking care of myself. Or that I thought I wasn't worth the money to do the things I cared about. I.E. I needed new t-shirts and I saw some on super-sale for like $4 on a website, so ordered a bunch, like 20, and they showed up and were so stiff, so scratch, so terrible. Then I saw an ad claiming "The softest shirts in the world" and they were like $20 each but I ordered a bunch of them, and they were amazing. It really taught me a lesson that if something is going to affect me that much, I should put the proper time and energy into it. Not blaming you or anything, but maybe it's a great learning experience that you really care about your hair and from now on you will spend the proper time and energy making sure it's done at good places?

If you ever have thoughts about suicide, please, please talk to someone and/or call a suicide hotline. The anxiety and depression is clouding your judgement and making it feel like killing yourself is the only and/or best option.

Have you talked to a therapist? For me it was the best thing I've ever done. It has tremendously improved my anxiety. It doesn't control me anymore how it used to.

Anxiety and depression are things that many people have experienced and even live with everyday. You are not alone in your struggles. There are many ways to improve your situation.

One thing that is critical for me is my self-talk. I didn't think I was being negative to myself, but I found out that I really was. If you say things like, "God, you are an idiot! Everyone can see how awkward you are!" then you are going to believe that that is true. Try identifying those thoughts and stopping them. Replace them with something genuinely positive. Maybe think about what you might say to an eight year old who came to you with this problem. They would say, "Everyone hates me, they can tell I'm nervous around them. I don't deserve to be alive." What would you say to this child? Try talking in a genuinely understanding voice and tell that child, "It's okay. Everyone gets anxious sometimes. And, being awkward isn't the end of the world. Sometimes people feel uncomfortable and it shows. People understand that." Try talking to yourself like you are the kid you are talking to. This scenario helped me because when I would talk to myself, I would say nice things, but in a tone that conveyed that I was annoyed with myself. When I think about how I would say those same things to someone else, I realized I wasn't being very nice to myself.

When you are in the situation where you feel awkward, try talking to yourself then too. Take deep breaths and tell yourself that it's okay. Tell yourself that this is a natural response that your brain is having. Your brain thinks that there is a threat on your life, so it goes into fight-or-flight mode. Your brain is doing this to protect your life--it just doesn't realize that you aren't actually in any danger. Explain this to yourself, tell yourself that your brain is stuck in a rut and that you are going to get it out of that rut. Tell yourself you can handle anything.

Going in to a situation that gives you anxiety and expecting it to be different....that isn't going to work. I know that a lot of people say to just do it and you will get over it, but that simply isn't the case. The people who say this are ignorant to your anxiety and depression. You have to change something about yourself first, before you can go into these situations and have a different outcome with them. Also, it can help to take baby steps before you just jump in the deep end. Try something smaller, like saying hello to the bus driver or asking the clerk at a store a question. Do this however many times it takes to be comfortable. Use positive self-talk around these situations and tell yourself that you are doing great. Even if you didn't get the outcome you wanted, you still were incredibly brave and tried your best. That's progress in itself. It's a long process and it won't always go well. That's okay. As long as you remember to tell yourself that it's okay to not always get it right, you will be on your way to a new you.

Also read books on depression and anxiety. That helped me realize that I'm not alone, and that there are many, many, many ways to help people with these problems. One book I really liked, that isn't necessarily about depression or anxiety, but made me realize the power you have to change your life, is The Brain That Changes Itself. It was the thing that inspired me to help myself, and made me believe in myself and my ability to change. It's about people's personal stories, but it's all backed up by scientific research. It makes you see that if someone who was born with literally half of a brain can learn to do things that doctors say you need the right side of your brain to do, that you must be able to do something about your own situation.

These are some things that have helped me. I hope they will help you and inspire you too. You can do this. I believe in you.

https://www.amazon.com/Boy-Who-Raised-Psychiatrists-Notebook-What/dp/0465094457/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1504048533&sr=8-1&keywords=the+boy+who+was+raised+as+a+dog

This book explains how the brain grows and how stress at different times during our childhood affects our development differently. I wrote a very short summary of the basic explanation a few days ago, I will put it below this comment. I found it really insightful and helpful, so maybe it helps you too. Also, just the way that guy seems to have endless patience with the children he helps, I learned to have a bit more patience with myself.

The way you write about your problems it sounds like you're generally afraid of social contact, not of specific settings? It's possible what you have is the so called "Avoidant Personality Disorder", not social anxiety. Same as me.

Either way, it is definitely possible to improve to a point where you can function socially, and stay there.

I spent my college time avoiding people as much as possible and basically stayed in my 1-room studio all the time. But it was pretty boring alone in that room, so I started reading and thinking. And the more I learned about myself, and about how the brain works, the easier it got to improve my situation, and to cope. Now I'm at a point where, while still not actively searching for it, I'm fairly comfortable with social contact and can step out into the world without my confidence breaking in shambles.

I don't know about 'cure', but it's definitely possible to cope, to gain control, and to improve, slowly, step by step.

Sometimes it also helps me to just get outside, away from technology and all that, and to just sit and breathe and remember how it feels to be alive. And with that, to remember why I keep struggling and refuse to ever give up. No matter how many times you have to fall down and embarrass yourself and feel like shit, you deserve to live life free and happy, and you should never stop fighting to get what you deserve.

(This is a general reply to everyone who might read this. If you found a way of living you are happy with OP, no need to change a thing. You are the only one who really knows what happiness and health means for you.)

Yeah, I'm going to focus on my strengths, not my weaknesses.

And I'm sorry your health care is garbage there :/ There are a lot of ways to start on your own! "Self-help" books (I say "self-help" because they aren't like shitty self-help books lol), online sites, worksheets, workshops.

You can try and see if there is a CBT work group in your area run by a therapist. They might be free or charge a slight fee. If you're not interested in that you can find tons of websites that are free.

[This site] (http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/step1.htm) is great because it has a guided program type thing and it has a toooonnnn of worksheets for all sorts of problems. It might be a little overwhelming at first so I would suggest following the steps and taking it slow.

Also, not exactly CBT but [The Feeling Good Handbook] (https://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-Handbook-David-Burns/dp/0452281326/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1483808657&sr=8-1&keywords=the+feeling+good+handbook) has a lot of steps and helpful exercises to help with procrastination, depression, anxiety, anger, etc. You might also look at [something like this] (https://www.amazon.com/Shyness-Social-Anxiety-Workbook-Step/dp/1572245530/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1483808741&sr=8-3&keywords=cbt+for+social+anxiety) (though I've never read this exact book myself, it looks good).


I've also used the CBT for Dummies book, surprisingly a good introduction.

Definitely give it a try! CBT has helped me so much with my SA. If you have any other questions feel free to ask :)

(for what it's worth I'm going into therapy as a career so I've researched this shit a ton, beyond just my own interests lol)

Disclaimer: I am not a licensed psychologist (yet) but I have been working in psychology and doing research on mental health for several years (mostly on bipolar disorder). I am not affiliated with any of the resources I have linked.

First, I would look to see if your University has any counseling services for you to use. I realize the idea of doing that sounds awful but you also realize you can't just go on like this forever.

Anxiety disorders, including social anxiety, are largely treated through changing your mindset and implementing new behaviors. Medication can help as well, but for many instances it's not a required piece of the treatment puzzle.

When you feel anxious and cave into the desire to flee from the situation, you reinforce that behavior response to those thoughts. What you need to do is alter one or both sides of that equation. So you can change your behavior response to the thoughts and you can also work on changing your mindset.

For behavior, it's both as easy and as hard as simply sticking it through. The first time you sit through an anxious situation is the hardest and from then on, it gets a little bit easier because you're been through it before and come out on the other side. The more times you can put yourself out there and stick it through, the less anxious you will be over the idea of sitting through the anxiety-producing situations in the first place.

For mindset, you need to start thinking about the reasons why you are so uncomfortable. There can be many but I find that a lot of it roots from self-esteem and a worry that you won't be accepted into the group. Or a worry that others are judging your actions and appearances. The truth is, most of us are just going through our own lives and see you as supporting character, at best, or more likely just a random extra. That sounds cold but it's just how we operate. I'm sure I've seen tons of weird people. I've seen tons of people trip or do something embarrassing. I've heard people give the wrong answers in class. But I never thought about those moments again. I can't tell you what those people looked like, let alone their names. So sometimes it can be freeing knowing that everything you do is going to be seen in that light. Make a mistake in class? Nobody is thinking about that when they get out - they are all focused on their next class or hanging out with their friends or something like that.

I'd recommend something like this workbook or any other workbook/worksheets designed to help people coach themselves through the cognitive behavioral therapy process. A good place to just start might be reading up on some CBT basics for anxiety.

I'm currently doing this workbook and it has been really helpful, much more helpful than some of the CBT stuff I tried to use. I also found this online guide, it is free and from what I can tell, seems really helpful too - I'll probably start using that too. Hope that helps you, best of luck!! :)

I'm reading a book now called Free Play which was given to me as a graduation gift by my grandmother a couple years ago, most likely because she thought it would help me write screenplays and achieve my dream of becoming a director. I saw that the book was about improv and art and assumed it was about acting and painting and shit which I had no interest in, so I left it on my bookshelf at home when I went off to college and forgot about it until a few weeks ago when I visited home for Thanksgiving. Probably because I'm struggling with writer's block, or possibly because I felt bad about never giving it a chance, or maybe even because deep down I knew it would help me combat my ever-worsening SA and depression, I brought it back with me and began reading it.

Holy shit. I can't exactly describe the book with words, but it's like psychotherapy. On a literal level, it's about how to clear your mind and change your thought process, based on how you view the universe in relation to yourself, to attain this enlightened, zen-like state of oneness with your surroundings and yourself, which clears all the bullshit from your mind and lets new ideas--previously locked away in your subconscious--flow continuously into your consciousness, allowing you to harness them for whatever your task is (aka: improvisation). The author uses music/dance/art/writing etc. as literal examples of artistic mediums but explains how the mindset required to truly create these things in the moment is one which we should strive to attain through practice and live with at every moment, without fear or judgment of the world of which we are a dynamic part. It's all about becoming aware and being able to draw wisdom and logic from the connection between the Self and your surroundings, through which you can find peace, happiness, perpetual clear-headedness, and channel 100% of your conscious and subconscious energy, working in symbiosis, into what you want, and how to cease giving a fuck about everything else. Fight Club philosophy told through examples of famous artists throughout history.

TL;DR Free Play, a book about chilling the fuck out and effectively going full-Buddhist to achieve every single one of your goals with clarity of mind

I'm still pretty young, 27, but I've had social anxiety since as long as I can remember and I can say it has decreased significantly over time.

I don't attribute that to age though. I started educating myself about it in my late high school years and really started taking action on it college. Honestly, based on my understanding on anxiety, it probably won't go away if your constantly reinforcing it through your actions, such as avoiding social interactions to not have to experience the distress that comes with it. Not to mention, social ability comes with practice, children learn to socialize by doing it, so while it may seem awkward at first trying to jump back into it, it does get better with time if you persist.

If you haven't done so already, I'd highly recommend seeking therapy, specifically something like cognitive behavioral therapy, or at the very least something that includes an element of exposure. If something like that is cost prohibitive, I can suggest the book I followed when I went to therapy:

Managing Social Anxiety: A Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy Approach (Treatments That Work) https://www.amazon.com/dp/0195336690/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_jqXVzbGGY7KGB

If you can go to therapy though, I'd still recommend that just because I feel like having someone there to hold you accountable really helps.

http://live.soundstrue.com/selfacceptance/event.php

https://www.amazon.com/Power-Now-Guide-Spiritual-Enlightenment/dp/1577314808

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The above links helped me a lot! You don't like yourself because people don't like you, but people would like you a lot more if you liked yourself. Ur caught in a catch 22 my friend. The information in the programs I linked you I think will help you break the cycle. I know it helped me.

pain is the best catalyst for great change

you need to meditate, here's how

this is literally your ticket out

you need to learn how to get out of your head and be in the now, the present moment

here is a good book you should read too

i also recommend listening to eckhart tolle and alan watts on youtube also. they have really good lectures on how to be in the present. start with eckhart tho

Thanks for sharing. I went through same thing but I decided not to give any fucks & do what I want. I advice you to read books about this subject like this one.

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life https://www.amazon.com/dp/0062457713/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_Ow3UzbRMTPEFP

Meditation helps a lot too. Download app called insight timer which is free or try out calm or headspace.

I see, in reading the comments, that you aren't very motivated to seek counseling, which is fine. Frankly, it isn't for everybody.

I'm a strong proponent of Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, due to the fact that it has completely turned my life around. This is something you can do WITHOUT professional help. There are many really awesome, step-by-step workbooks out there to walk yourself through CBT at your own pace. This one was the one I used primarily, and I think it's awesome. There are plenty out there, though, and I encourage finding what works for you. There is no one-size-fits-all thing for this kind of problem.

Definitely! I bought this a while back, mainly because I liked its practical (clinical) approach based on using CBT in conjunction with exposure

Coincidentally, I decided my first exposure was to pay for the book at the bookstore counter instead of order it off amazon B)

https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/1401938094/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o05_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

this book is great

You could always buy a book on the subject.

Like this or this

https://ibb.co/fCygPWZ



https://ibb.co/s61P32w

Couldn't post pictures so here's some links. This book saved me.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0465005454/ref=ppx_yo_mob_b_inactive_ship_o0_img?ie=UTF8&psc=1

I have the second edition

does the cover look like this https://www.amazon.com/dp/0465005454/ or this https://www.amazon.com/dp/1849010005/ ?

Managing Social Anxiety: A Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy Approach has helped me a lot and if you're in therapy I highly recommend integrating it into your treatment.

These two books will help you do that.

https://www.amazon.com/Power-Now-Guide-Spiritual-Enlightenment/dp/1577314808

And this one tells the same thing but from the 60s... So it's more cryptic, however it has dope art.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0517543052/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1475120425&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=be+here+now+ram+dass

Gillian Butler's Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness is a very helpful self-help book. It's very straight forward. She explains why social anxiety happens, and then she goes into techniques to get over it. It's helped me quite a lot!

http://www.amazon.com/Overcoming-Social-Anxiety-Shyness-Behavioral/dp/0465005454/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1450275542&sr=8-1&keywords=gillian+butler+overcoming+anxiety+and+shyness

http://www.amazon.com/Self-Esteem-Cognitive-Techniques-Assessing-Maintaining/dp/1572241985/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1453949105&sr=8-1&keywords=self+esteem

Some people will tell you "just don't care about what others think about you! Stop giving a shit!".

However, you can't do that. You evolved to be a social animal. You evolved to do your best to fit into a society. Our ancestors who didn't try to fit into the group likely died. You evolved to give some concern to what others think about you.

What you can do though: stop guessing what other people think about you. Do you actually know what they think about you? How can you be sure?

Here's a great book that I push on Reddit because it helped me so much: LINK. It calls guessing at what other people think about you "mind reading". It encourages you to realize that you really have no idea what others are thinking about you. You can guess, but you'll likely be wrong most of the time anyway, so it's best if you just avoid doing it.

TL;DR: Don't try to stop caring; that's impossible. Try to stop guessing because you suck at guessing.