Reddit mentions of The Asshole Survival Guide: How to Deal with People Who Treat You Like Dirt

Missed this one. https://www.amazon.com/Asshole-Survival-Guide-People-Treat/dp/1328695913/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?keywords=how+to+deal+with+assholes&qid=1551202999&s=gateway&sr=8-1

> Can you elaborate on the personality shift?

Usually an influx of people generally described as jerks. They monetize the typical workplace trust relationships at the cost of every other factor, including their management chain and the company itself, excelling at deflecting scrutiny, then move onto their next victims.

Read The Asshole Survival Guide: How to Deal with People Who Treat You Like Dirt for starters.

The Asshole Survival Guide: How to Deal with People Who Treat You Like Dirt https://www.amazon.com/dp/1328695913/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_dVJYCbYYK8GJZ

This is on the research side, but hoping it's still useful as a reference... We (Knowable Magazine) published an article over the summer about abusive supervisors & what I/O Psych research says about them, including how to deal with them: https://www.knowablemagazine.org/article/society/2018/bad-bosses-dealing-abusive-supervisors

And a couple of relevant sources our reporter referenced:

• Robert Sutton: Business researcher at Stanford University and author of The Asshole Survival Guide: How to Deal with People Who Treat You Like Dirt
  
• 2017 study that found that bosses can lose control and become abusive if they feel that employees have turned against them (paywalled)
  
  There's also a link to a review in the Annual Review of Organization Psychology and Organizational Behavior about Abusive Supervision at the very bottom. It's paywalled, but if you go through our article, you should be able to reach the HTML version that's free-to-read online (we share a publisher with the journal)

I use vague friendliness and disengage as soon as possible.

Not sure if this is a trait of an INFJ, but I noticed I get projected on from other people, like I'm a walking mirror. So I don't let their comments sink in, it's a glimpse into their psychology.

Sometimes I need more time alone when I'm not working to recharge.

I highly recommend you read "The Asshole Survival Guide: How to Deal with People Who Treat You Like Dirt."
https://www.amazon.com/Asshole-Survival-Guide-People-Treat/dp/1328695913

By getting the heck out of there.

​

Your post does remind me of a something I saw in a bookstore yesterday:

[Amazon] The Asshole Survival Guide: How to Deal with People Who Treat You Like Dirt

Let's first be very clear on what I mean by an asshole. I am using the definition of "certified asshole" by Robert Sutton, who wrote the important books The No Asshole Rule and The Asshole Survival Guide.

But why do I think that Satanism is a religion that's just perfect for assholes?

1. In The Nine Satanic Sins the cardinal sin is listed as "stupidity". It's a calling trait of assholes that they think they are intellectually superior to everyone around them. In fact, if you go to Robert Sutton's Are You A Certified Asshole? test then the very first question is: "You feel surrounded by incompetent idiots – and you can’t help letting them know the truth every now and then. (True/False)"
   
2. The Nine Satanic Statements states "Satan represents vengeance instead of turning the other cheek!". It's a religion that actively promotes revenge for whenever you feel slighted. There are more civil and healthy ways of dealing with hurt feelings, but assholes would disagree.
   
3. The Nine Satanic Statements also states "Satan represents all of the so-called sins, as they all lead to physical, mental, or emotional gratification!" In other words, if it's "emotionally gratifying" to be a huge asshole, then do it. Assholes always get a thrill out of punishing people who they think are "asking for it". "Stupid" people, perhaps?
   
4. The Eleven Satanic Rules of the Earth states "Do not harm little children." Adults are fair game.
   
5. The Eleven Satanic Rules of the Earth also states: "If a guest in your lair annoys you, treat him cruelly and without mercy." Satanism supports cruelty when it's "deserved" (for someone who is "annoying", apparently).
   
   Now I notice that your flair says you are a "Satanic Theist", and everything I've quoted from LaVeyan Satanism, which is atheist, so perhaps these rules are nothing about your religion. In which case, I invite you to correct me where I am wrong, and how I need to update my understanding about your religion.

There are lots of factors involved. What it boils down to for me is that abuse is bad, and if the abuser is trying to obtain something, then there is a better way of getting that.

I've read a few books on abuse, and this is probably the best one for most scenarios:

https://www.amazon.com/Asshole-Survival-Guide-People-Treat/dp/1328695913

Another reason to read more than the classics. :)

edit: support is a factor. If the person who is abusing you is giving you something, then you're more likely to stay in that relationships. I try to stay away from abusive people. They will make excuses, but if they're not going to change, then there's lots of people to hang out with who will treat you better.

I had something similar happen... I ended up leaving the job (wasn't going to get my contract renewed anyways), but did pick up this fun book:

https://www.amazon.com/Asshole-Survival-Guide-People-Treat/dp/1328695913

Will, at the very least, give you some comfort that you're not alone

Here's a book just for you: https://www.amazon.com/Asshole-Survival-Guide-People-Treat/dp/1328695913/ref=sr_1_10?keywords=How+to+deal+with+toxic+people&qid=1556139001&s=gateway&sr=8-10