Reddit mentions of Portable Mini Vaporizers Machine 2019 Upgrade Handheld Steam Compressor Humidifier Vaporizer Cool Mist Inhaler Kits for Adults & Kids (1) (T24)

I have a sorta similar problem, not with the incontinence, kinda the opposite there. I clench my PFM way too often and they are usually too tight. I even have to push to pee past them. But that constant clenching tires them out and I don't have a lot of force behind my contractions. I think I do it out of anxiety. I have this dilator set to help stretch out and relax the muscles, though I need to be actually doing it. (I did for a while and it helped and then I stopped, poopoo on me.)

I also went to physical therapy where she actually figured out what was wrong, did massages to help relax my vagina and we did practices for me to feel what it was like to properly relax and clench. If you're having incontinence issues, I would strongly suggest getting a referral to a PT practice that specializes in pelvic floor restoration.

I've had my share of anal fissures and abscesses. Fortunately my gyno is familiar with crohns. I told her sex was painful and she said it's because, similar to what you describe, everything down there is so close together that my pelvic floor muscles were really hard and raw when they should be soft. She sent me to a physical therapist who literally had me do exercises with my vagina (think kegels but more). She would also massage my pelvic flior. She also told me to buy this: https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B01G7QNLX8/ref=mp_s_a_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1473014356&sr=8-2&pi=SX200_QL40&keywords=vaginal+dilator&dpPl=1&dpID=31jcZbPtLXL&ref=plSrch

They are basically different size dildos and you start small and then increase the size at your own pace. This helped me. Also, a patient significant other is very helpful. Work those pelvic floor muscles!