Reddit mentions of How to Understand Your Gender

A lot of it is just how you feel internally. I'm amab, but don't usually present in a feminine way in public due to how many assholes are out there. When I do, I make sure that I'm armed.

This book would probably answer all of your questions, and it does so in a very user friendly and easy to understand way, even for people who are straight and cis: How to Understand Your Gender https://www.amazon.com/dp/1785927469/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_txISDbVPY8001

I'm really sorry you are going through this tough time. Gender and identity can be tricky and heartbreaking for millennial in liberal cities (like me), it can be much harder for people in your situation. But that doesn't mean its impossible.

​

I imagine that this will be tricky to suppress for the rest of your life. Being in touch with who we are is important, even if it can be tough. But that doesn't mean it needs to happen all at once, or in a disorganised manner. Sometimes having a few people who know the 'real you' can alleviate some of the pressure. One of those people might be a therapist who can help you work through any other options that are available.

​

You might find this book helpful, Meg John Barker is an excellent writer on gender (gen x, I would guess). I've also heard good things about Kate Borstein's Gender Outlaw (and she narrates the audiobook so you could listen to it on your commute) - she's gen x as well.

​

I hope this helps, and my thoughts are with you.

Yes, waiting can be hard. It took 4 months to get into a gender therapist in Boston. It is worth it though. In the meantime there are some books that may help them to better understand their feelings and options. There are two workbooks that I read that were okay:

• You and Your Gender Identity: A Guide to Discovery
  
• My New Gender Workbook: A Step-by-Step Guide to Achieving World Peace Through Gender Anarchy and Sex Positivity
  
  A Guide to Gender - The Social Justice Advocate's Handbook and the author is great and this Ted Talk he did is awesome.
  
  Some others are:
  
  
• The Queer and Transgender Resilience Workbook: Skills for Navigating Sexual Orientation and Gender Expression (New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook)
  
• How to Understand Your Gender
  
  Perhaps these will help them and even yourself find your answers.