#16 in Gender studies
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Reddit mentions of The Nearest Exit May Be Behind You
Sentiment score: 2
Reddit mentions: 3
We found 3 Reddit mentions of The Nearest Exit May Be Behind You. Here are the top ones.
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I'm glad it helps. :)
Actually, this is mildly cathartic, having an outlet for all those "should've, could've" thoughts...
Involve others with more experience.
Learn about your community.
Heal thyself.
Finally, and most importantly, you do belong.
You don't have to be presenting in your preferred gender to go to a support group. You don't have to start HRT to comment on a board. There's a pervasive sense among trans folk that there are real trans people out there and we're not they. But the moment you recognize this part of yourself you're a part of our world whether you like it or not, and all of us feel just as different. Smile, introduce yourself, and share aspects of yourself among friends who have those same parts and who are just bursting for the opportunity to talk about it with anyone who understands.
Sigh, I could ramble on, but I need to get back to work... I guess I can sum it up in promising, cross my heart, the world is a beautiful and wonderful place, and you're going to love it out here. :)
> passing
One re-phrasing of this that I really liked(from a chapter of this book that also discusses why 'passing' isn't a great term, for the curious) was whether someone is read as their gender.
It moves the onus of responsibility from the transperson being the one who has to pass to other people being the ones who should read them correctly. It also removes the gross undertones that transpeople are somehow in disguise and 'passing' is just their disguise working.
Of course in a perfect world we wouldn't need termonology around it at all, but this isn't that world (yet) and people need some way to talk about their experiences.
I want to say something, but you seem to have so much already worked out that I'm unsure as to what exactly I should.
First of all, don't worry. All of us here totally have your back. I think you'll be surprised by how many people can relate to your feelings (a double edged sword really. Yay, I belong; Aww, I'm not special ^_^ ). If you want to put a label to yourself (and by all means, feel free not to), I suggest starting somewhere around here. If you'd like to read about other people's theories and experiences then Bornstein and Bergman are right up your alley.
You're already starting to explore, so I don't really know what else to tell you. Just remember that you are doing this for you. You don't have to conform to anyone's notion of trans any more than you have to conform to anyone's notion of female. Do whatever makes you happy.