Reddit mentions of Who's Pulling Your Strings?: How to Break the Cycle of Manipulation and Regain Control of Your Life

I have PTSD from an abusive childhood, and formally diagnosed ADHD which I take medication for. Here are some things that helped me the most:

• The book "Complex PTSD" by Pete Walker
  (Literally can't recommend this book enough. I think it will help you to read it too.)
  https://www.amazon.com/dp/1492871842/ref=cm_sw_r_em_apa_i_jMhVDbRZRTVAE
  
  
• Pete Walker's Website, with free excerpts of the book
  http://pete-walker.com/
  
  
• Psychology Today: If you're in the U.S., this website is fantastic for finding a therapist. You can filter by insurance, specialty, gender, religious affiliation, LGBT+ friendly, etc. This is how I found my current therapist.
  https://www.psychologytoday.com/us
  
  
• /r/cptsd is painful to read, but has a lot of useful insights and recommendations. I recommend crossposting this there.
  
  
• My ADHD affects my PTSD a lot, so treating the ADHD (which it sounds like you guys doing, which is awesome) is super important for making progress with PTSD. I found this explanation of ADHD really insightful.
  https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/azsvcd/complete_transcript_for_this_is_how_you_treat/
  
  
• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy has been life changing for me. There are many other types of therapies, but I'm partial to this. Dialectical Behavioral Therapy and EMDR are a couple of other popular ones for PTSD.
  
  
• Try to find out if he has any form of Sensory Processing disorder or sensitivity, since it's common with both PTSD and adhd. I only discovered that I had it very recently, but the awareness has been super helpful in regulating my moods. Earplugs for sleep and noisy times of day reduce my nightmares and flashbacks in general. Soft, nonrestrictive clothing helps me feel safe and less stressed. https://www.spdstar.org/basic/symptoms-checklist
  
  
• The book "Who's Pulling Your Strings?" by Dr. Harriet Braiker
  This bookhelped me recognize the ways in which I still volunteer myself as a scapegoat, and figure out where I needed to create my boundaries.
  https://www.amazon.com/dp/0071446729/ref=cm_sw_r_em_apa_i_v5hVDbJDTYSDK
  
  You did the right thing by putting your foot down. Just so you know, his past and mental illness are never a valid excuse for treating you badly, and its healthy for him for you to set the boundaries you need. Caregiver fatigue is real, and you can only help him if your needs are met too.
  
  I hope this helps! Please pm me if you have specific questions or would like to talk more about PTSD/ADHD stuff!.
  
  Edit: formatting

Your Perfect Right: Assertiveness and Equality in Your Life and Relationships

Humble Inquiry: The Gentle Art of Asking Instead of Telling

If you think that your manipulative attitude roots from dealing with other manipulative people,

Who's Pulling Your Strings?: How to Break the Cycle of Manipulation and Regain Control of Your Life

Here's a really good book suggestion

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.amazon.com/Whos-Pulling-Your-Strings-Manipulation/dp/0071446729&ved=2ahUKEwj_8dm9n6rjAhVLOs0KHe6ICHIQFjAOegQIAxAB&usg=AOvVaw1hbOiiffCn-c0duItxHDZ5

My therapist recommended "who's pulling your strings?" for learning how to deal with my MIL in a healthy way. I haven't read it yet but the Amazon blurb looks promising.

https://www.amazon.com/Whos-Pulling-Your-Strings-Manipulation/dp/0071446729

Yes, this is true. With really good at their job narcissists, they are hard to spot because their lies are so believable. I was taken in too and can kind of understand the FM’s. But, when logic is staring them in the face, I have to draw the line.

With nfamily, it can be so hard to distinguish normal vs. narcissist and I know that’s why it took me so long to recognize my sister as a N.

An author I found who has really helped me is: HG Tudor (on Amazon). Keep in mind, this author is a narcissist. But, the value is that he explains what he is thinking which I think is invaluable since I do not think like a N. At. All. And my trying to figure things out with my nonN brain makes the process take a long time.

Lastly, there is a fantastic book called: “Who’s Pulling Your Strings” by Harriet Braiker. https://www.amazon.com/dp/0071446729/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_HWzLBbXFDFNXZ

I read this book regularly to help me with all manipulative people.

Per quanto riguardi gli "amici", leggi questo libro.

https://www.amazon.com/Whos-Pulling-Your-Strings-Manipulation/dp/0071446729

Si trova anche il pdf. Ti consiglio di iniziare da lì, visto che è la prima cosa che menzioni e che forse in questo momento fa male un po' di più.

(Leggo ora come ti definisci "molto altruista" e come questo crei problemi. Ti consiglio il libro ancora più caldamente.)

These aren't exactly what you described, but they are books on power and manipulation with yellow covers.

http://www.amazon.com/Whos-Pulling-Your-Strings-Manipulation/dp/0071446729/ref=sr_1_7?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1313127912&sr=1-7

http://www.amazon.com/Power-Brainwashing-Manipulation-comes-after/dp/1456592874/ref=sr_1_3?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1313127875&sr=1-3