Reddit mentions of The Obstacle Is the Way: The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph

I would say, but you probably won't finish it /s

Oddly enough The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a Fuck was a really round-about way of achieving discipline. By building up the practice of saying NO to others, I also built up the ability to say NO to myself ("NO, you don't get five-more-minutes of sleep, you need to get up and work-out")

http://amzn.com/0316270725



The Obstacle Is the Way is another solid one. While a cliffnotes version would be preferable, the gist is akin to JFK's quote "We choose to do these things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard" (paraphrased)

http://amzn.com/B00G3L1B8K

Holy sh!t

Get out, get out!

oh! I am so sorry this has happened to you.

I too, multiple times in life, and I'm a guy, gained scars (not as deep as yours) sitting in a bishops and stake pres offices "repenting" as they drilled into all the details of my sexual behavior. Only later (decades) did I learn that I am actually totally normal. But my whole life I have been running from hidden shame and guilt and embarrassment from these exchanges with "inspired men." It's SOOOOOOOOO unhealthy! Yes, get a good therapist. Read healthy books, find loving caring authentic friends, and start loving and accepting yourself. You are not broken or soiled, you have not lost your virtue or any bullsh!t like that. You are an infinitely valuable human being and there is only ONE of you in all the universe, you are unspeakably precious, and the fact that you are human and have scars is part of what makes you so worth knowing, worth understanding, worth loving!

Regarding your folks... it sounds like it will be a rough road for you with them... just try to remember that they are trapped in a system of thoughts that over-rides their ability to see clearly and freely. Work towards finding a safe relationship with them, and by that I mean proper boundaries and healthy distance. Be as close to them as you can be without allowing it to wreck your safety and peace. This is YOUR life. No one else's and you have every right to be happy, fulfilled, loved, and loving.

A couple of my favorite books recently

https://www.amazon.com/Obstacle-Way-Timeless-Turning-Triumph-ebook/dp/B00G3L1B8K/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1503843271&sr=8-1&keywords=the+obstical+is+the+way

https://www.amazon.com/Daily-Stoic-Meditations-Wisdom-Perseverance-ebook/dp/B01HNJIJB2/ref=pd_sim_351_2?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=SR7V0K2QXQK0M782EQTY

all the rest of my thoughts that come from my own journey can be found here in case it helps you collect your thoughts. good luck! and we are here for you! internet hug!

https://www.reddit.com/r/exmormon/comments/6smc4i/40_yrs_a_mormon_posted_on_blogger_too/

"Whether you think you can or you can't, you're right."
First off, I want you to know that these thoughts you are experiencing are normal, and that you're human. It's natural to self doubt and to experience negative feelings.
That said, you're asking this community whether you should have a boyfriend, and yet you answered your own question in an essay I'm sure was easy to knock out due to how accustomed you are to berating yourself. If it isn't already obvious, the answer to your question is a resounding "no."
If you have no self-respect, I guarantee you that a boyfriend will not fix that. A boyfriend won't solve any of your current issues. You will constantly be "a drunken mistake" if you keep viewing yourself as one.
Here is some advice coming from someone who was once in a really similar stage as you (minus the autism):

• acknowledge the difference between failing at something and being a failure-- the two are different. Right now, all you have done is failed at a lot of things. you are not a failure. A failure is someone who has given up completely. This is not you, since you are reaching out for help through this post.
  
• you HAVE to love yourself to accomplish what you want in life. Loving yourself will lead to self respect, which leads to better decisions, which leads to caring about class, fewer (and eventually no more) suicidal thoughts, better body image, etc. etc. A positive domino effect in your life can be created just by turning the switch from "let's list negative things about myself" to "let's list positive things about myself."
  
  
  I promise you that you can do this. Right now you are in a heavy downward spiral, convinced that you can't do anything. This was me once, and I can tell you from first hand experience that what you want in life is completely attainable. You just have to stop being so hard on yourself.
  I want to end this comment with a book that I read every day called The Obstacle Is The Way by Ryan Holiday. If you have an iPhone/iPad, here's the iBook link. Here's the Kindle version.
  You know, if you don't have either (or you aren't able to spend $4), I would be more than willing to try and convert my eBook copy of it to a PDF. I believe in this book that much, and I think it would really benefit you too. (I'm not being paid to say this either)
  Edit: by the way, that book has no religious agenda. I have no religious agenda. I thought I would get that out there.

Mindset, and the ability to stick with things, matters more than the path you choose. How to get the right mindset? Read or listen to things that help you attain the mindset you need to conquer your obstacles. It's like hanging around with ultra-successful people who are mentoring you every day. Here are some good things to read or listen to:

• The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday
  
  
• Meditations by Marcus Aurelius (free online, or pay for the Hays Translation which is supposedly better)
  
  
• The Happiness Trap by Russ Harris
  
  A TL;DR of the mindset you're going for: There are some things you can control and some you can't. For the things you can't control, don't worry about them! For the things you can control, be like a blazing fire that consumes anything that stands in its way. If you have even an ounce of control over something, master yourself and push will all your might against the obstacle.

You're welcome! As others have stated in this thread, you can find many of the works online since they're in the public domain.

I wouldn't say that I'm very knowledgeable about stoicism, but I recommend following Ryan Holiday's blog (http://www.ryanholiday.net). Here are a couple article he wrote about stoicism: 1, 2, [3]. He wrote a book about stoicism called The Obstacle is the Way that makes for an easy read about being stoic. Holiday did a podcast interview with Tim Ferriss about this book and stoicism, and then some (Ferriss is a big fan of Seneca). Holiday also did a TED talk about "stoic optimism." Holiday's writings in generally are pretty great, but his expertise is mostly (the manipulation of the) media and marketing.

Maria Popova also wrote about Seneca's On the Shortness of Life, Marcus Aurelius, and Montaigne, who was heavily influenced by stoicism. She also wrote about Epictetus and a posted a short Visual Dictionary of the Major Schools of Philisophy. There's also Popova's podcast appearance of Ferriss' podcast(check the show notes for when they discussion Seneca and stoicism it might be for a short time but it's a good episode about organizing life and priorities in general). I recommend following Popova's http://www.brainpickings.org/ too since there are a lot of great, intellectually stimulating posts.

James Altucher also has a couple podcasts that are good. He has his interview podcast where he interviews big thinkers of a topic and he has a podcast called "Ask Altucher" where he answers listeners questions and then some. He also has a blog that has good posts too. He comes off as a pretty stoic guy, like Ryan Holiday.

I think these are all a pretty good starting points. Take your time and be discriminating in your path. Don't overburden yourself either. Starting small is essential!

I hope this helped and feel free to message me!

Feel the Fear and Do It Anyways by Susan Jeffers is pretty solid.

The Obstacle is The Way is one of my personal favorites. I've purchased this book around 4 times as gifts for friends and it's my personal bible. By pushing through boundaries, even if they are difficult, we grow. The book teaches how to approach anxiety inducing scenarios with new perspectives that make it tolerable and empowering to push forward. We grow by pushing through uncomfortable scenarios. This is how we grow confidence. Confidence is not simply being able to do something. It's being ok that you're fearful, but proceeding anyways because you know deep down that whatever happens, you'll be able to handle the result.

You might find an interesting and useful perspective in the book The Obstacle is the Way. It's a layman's introduction into Stoicism.

I know this is going to sound like an odd suggestion, but I just finished an amazing book called "The Obstacle is the Way" by Ryan Holiday. The byline is "The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumphs". It has lots of historical examples of people who have overcome adversity and how to have the attitude to accomplish your goals.

Your situation does not sound like much fun, but it will get better.

You can get a hard copy or if you have the kindle app on your phone you can read it there.

http://www.amazon.com/Obstacle-Way-Timeless-Turning-Triumph-ebook/dp/B00G3L1B8K

Edit: If you cannot afford it I would be happy too buy you a copy. PM me with your contact info.

Yupp, they do.

https://www.amazon.com/Obstacle-Way-Timeless-Turning-Triumph-ebook/dp/B00G3L1B8K/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1469326928&sr=8-1


https://www.amazon.com/Calm-Cool-Collected-Demolish-Anxiety-ebook/dp/B015LF7KJC/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1469326934&sr=8-1&keywords=calm+cool+collected



https://www.amazon.com/50th-Law-Robert-Greene-Collection-ebook/dp/B002RI9ZQI/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1469326919&sr=8-1