Reddit mentions: The best spa beds & tables

I've been in your shoes. Sex was frequent, but very one-sided, and eventually my libido just zeroed out. And my guy stopped initiating because he didn't want sex that wasn't enjoyable for me.

We were able to dig ourselves out of that hole with some research and a serious commitment to do-it-yourself sex therapy.

This is a description I wrote about how we got messed up and how we got out if it:

• Escaping a Dead Bedroom.
  
  Our starting point was somewhat different from yours and not everything that we did will work for other people, but parts of it may be applicable to you and just seeing how someone else succeeded may help.
  
  These will help you develop a program of your own:
  
  
• How Women Can Become (More) Orgasmic – This is an overview that includes links to more than a dozen other useful resources, including three very helpful books for both of you. One of those books is...
  
  
• Becoming Orgasmic: A Sexual and Personal Growth Program for Women – This should be your highest priority. If you don't do anything else, at least get this book and work through it. Over the last 40 years it has helped hundreds of thousands of women in exactly your situation. The first part of the book is a program for you to do by yourself, to help you sort out your own feelings about sex and deal with what has been blocking your ability to become aroused and reach orgasm. The second part of the book is what is now usually called Sensate Focus Therapy (SFT), but this version is specifically oriented toward women with orgasm problems.
  
  
• Sensate Focus Therapy – This is a short online guide to SFT that you can use as a cheatsheet. Once you're ready, I strongly recommend doing this with your husband for at least three or four months, with no PIV allowed for the first few months. This is the first course of therapy that almost any competent sex therapist would prescribe, but you don't need a therapist to do it. After that, it's a good idea to make sensual massage a regular part of your weekend pre-sex routine.
  
  
• A good, inexpensive, folding massage table. For both SFT and regular sex, it really helps to have a comfortable massage table you can adjust to the right height. Amazon has them for under $100. (I also use ours to sort and fold laundry, and I'm told they make great changing tables.) Also get some coconut oil and a couple of big bath sheets or beach towels.]
  
  
• OMG Yes!!! – This is a review of a great app for men and women who need help figuring out the art of clitoral stimulation. You can try out different things for yourself and then show your husband what works best for you just by referring to the app. It makes communication much easier if you are shy about talking about your needs. It's also a perfect complement to "She Comes First," one of the books mentioned in the first article.
  
  
• The Mystery of Arousal and Vaginal Wetness – clearing up some common and harmful false beliefs about how our bodies respond to sexual arousal.
  
  
• What Lesbian Couples Can Teach Straight Couples About Good Sex – This is about a key lesson: nothing messes up a woman's libido more reliably than consistently having sex without being sexually aroused. (You may recognize yourself in Bev.)
  
  I think the most important thing for you to keep in mind is that a LOT of women take years to "wake up" sexually. During my research on tantric sex I interviewed a number of women who had their first orgasms in their late 20s to late 30s and who have gone on to have rich, lusty, thoroughly enjoyable sex lives. Although it's remotely possible that you are asexual, that's actually very rare. It is far more likely that you are simply a late bloomer whose sexual development was inhibited for a variety reasons in your teens and 20s.
  
  If you are serious about fixing your DB and saving your marriage, you and your husband need to make a commitment to a gradual process of learning to connect on a physical level and teaching your body how to respond to sex in a pleasurable way. And, as I indicated, the best place to start is with Becoming Orgasmic and sensate focus therapy. There's a reason SFT is the gold standard for sex therapy. The process may seem a bit artificial at first, but if you stick with it, it works wonders. (As a bonus, it feels really good!)
  
  Doing this with an infant in the house means making time for SFT every weekend when the baby is asleep. If she takes her longest naps in the early afternoon, for example, then you need to make sure you don't have any conflicts during that time and that you have done the setup in advance so you're prepared to grab the chance. It's going to require some creativity and persistence, a lot of love, and a sense of humor, but it's doable.
  
  Good luck!
  

Okay, I'm late, but I do have one tip no one has mentioned.

First, thank you for posting this. I had my implant taken out 2 weeks ago, and from the feel of things, I'm about to have my first shark week in 10 years. I have read everything everyone here has said, and I am praying we don't have the any of the major problems. (People talk about tearing and scarring and botched repairs like it's normal, and I'm going, "Please, not me!")

Anyway, I assumed I had nothing to add, but actually I do. More than a year ago I raved about our massage table to a friend of mine who was pregnant, and she got one and fell in love with it. So I wanted to share with you what she said about why a good massage table is one of the best sex accessories anyone can have AND is also a tremendously handy thing to have when you have a baby!

To start with, this is the one we have, only ours is black. Shakti and u/Cockring_Buddha have the same table, and I think several other SO30ers do as well.

And we all love it. It's insanely cheap - like $67 as I type this - but it's comfortable, solid, rugged, and portable, and it folds up nicely when you need it out of the way.

The only weakness is the handrest that hangs from three straps at the front. The straps are just stapled on and the staples come out if you push too hard. That's easy enough to fix, but we prefer to use the armrests on the sides instead, so it doesn't matter to us.

Anyway... it's perfect for:

• Backrubs & massages, which I'm told pregnant women and new moms need lots of.
  
  
• The butterfly position, the perfect position for third trimester sex (or so I'm told), and a good one for mom when she's ready to get back in the game.
  
  
• Tantric sex if you guys want to learn. (There's still lots of time!)
  
  
• Sorting laundry - with diapers and kid clothes, this becomes much more challenging and a good table helps.
  
  
• Diapers - the thick padding makes it a great changing table with so much space even the wiggliest baby won't roll off.
  
  
• Other baby stuff - it's a great place for dressing a kid and doing things that are more fun for you and them when they're at adult eye level; "just never leave a crawler unattended on it for even a second!"
  
  (The top is easy to clean in case of messes, but my friend does recommend putting a plastic mat and a towel under the kid for diaper changes.)
  
  So there you go, my one useful contribution.
  
  Good luck with the conception sweepstakes!
  

Check EBay for massage tables, I got one for around $120 and it's great! It folds away for easy storage and has really upped my massage game. Massaging each other on the bed is fine but you can't get the real traction needed for real kneading and stroking. When I know my wife has had a long day you have to see her eyes light up when she comes home and sees the bedroom all set up with candles and the table is out and set up. She can't climb on fast enough. Since you both are into it you can take turns treating each other to a good massage and other things as well. Wink Wink Nudge Nudge! My advice is go to different spas and talk about the massage you just had, what you liked and didn't like. Also you can start going to the Spa shows that pop up around the country and see the things they have going on there. Here's a link http://www.iecsc.com/ We go and picked up the towels, oils as well as a ton of other stuff they offer there. These are the vendors where the nail salons and spas get their stuff from. We picked up a hot towel steamer for $100 bucks and had to buy the special towels that go with it online but it was so worth it. On a cold morning I go to the bathroom first press a button and in less that ten minutes we have hot towels and they are so refreshing on a cold winters morning. Wow I wrote alot but if you have any questions just reply. Good luck. I just checked and wow they got cheaper https://www.amazon.com/Heaven-Massage-Burgundy-Portable-Table/dp/B00IXWE1HK/ref=sr_1_5_s_it?s=beauty&ie=UTF8&qid=1504572073&sr=1-5&keywords=massage%2Btables&th=1

I was actually about to make a very similar post. Great minds think alike!

I am starting out soonish, and I am trying to get an idea of what I will be needing, and paying attention to prices. A friend of a friend wants to sell me her table; it was originally $700 and she's asking $350. A friend of mine who started MT about 2 years ago said that it is a good table, but since I am just starting out, I don't need one that nice. She then sent me to a link for one on Amazon, let me grab the link

http://www.amazon.com/Master-Massage-Coronado-Portable-Carrying/dp/B000EN6NPY/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top

This one has a built-in heating pad which sounded pretty fancy to me. At $265 that seems like a pretty good price, right? Again, I am not even in my first class yet, so what do I know. Just trying to help! :)

We are (M60) and (F64) I have RA and while she's never been tested, I bet she does too but certainly milder than I. She also has blockages in the arteries in her legs that make holding her legs in one position for an extended time painful. One of the best sex toys/pieces of furniture we've bought is an inexpensive massage table It took a lot of load off my knees during our massage foreplay and helped her relax more too. For our sex, it's been the best money I ever spent.

We've tried an incline pillow and it really didn't do a lot for us. Absolutely one of the worst investments we ever made is a king size bed with one of those memory foam pillow tops on it. Sleeps great for me, terrible for her but offers zero support if you are one your knees, it's like being in a mudhole. Forget massage and other out of the ordinary sex on that thing, it was actually the prime motivator for the massage table. For giving her oral these days, I much prefer to have her scoot to the edge of the bed and I get on my knees on the floor. The floor is actually easier on my knees (we have carpet in the bedrooms) and her ass doesn't sink to some unreachable spot in the pillow top. For BJ she lays on her side at the edge of the bed and props up with our wedge pillow while I stand.

We've found for PIV that spooning is about the most comfortable position for both of us. Doggie is OK, but again, the knee thing becomes an issue. Missionary is OK, but my wrists give up real quick. I can only do the modified missionary where a guys lower leg is folded under him and raises her ass on his thighs for a short time as well. If I didn't have to walk after it would be great.

Sex as we age is a challenge for sure. Between health problems that interfere with arousal, erection and orgasm (for us both) to health problems that make the act itself more difficult, we have both found ourselves looking at each other saying, "We should have done a lot more fucking when we were 30"

https://www.ebay.com/itm/New-3-Padding-Folding-77-PU-Portable-Massage-Table-w-Free-Carry-Case-Bed-Spa/223588638982?hash=item340eebe106:g:ywcAAOSwOIJdLDNz

I got this one 5 years ago @ $119. Has held up well. Heaviest client 250lbs. As an additional test, I stood at the head, client at the tail and we both jumped up and down for a good 20 seconds for a dynamic weight of about 300lbs, no issues.The only thing to be careful of is clients putting their hands into the table's hole when flipping over. This usually won't be an issue if u have an extra sheet/table warmer on it, but they can easily destroy the platform holding the pillow if directly pressuring it, giving it a permanent hole. They've updated the design a little bit so I can't fully vouch for the quality today. The included half bolster is great for tiny people, but on the softer/flatter side. You'll probably want to get a full round one for supine work/bigger clients. Keep in mind this model is 77" long 30 " Wide 3" thick. Most standard tables are ~73/28/2 so you can save another 20 bucks if you don't need the extra size/weight.

The headrest/pilow is a piece of crap so I paired it up with this (I know, it's the price of the table lol)

https://www.amazon.com/EARTHLITE-Massage-Table-Cradle-CARESS/dp/B01LN2KAM6/ref=sr_1_2?keywords=head+cradle+strata&qid=1566106904&s=gateway&sr=8-2

There's also a flexrest model so if you can find that for cheaper go for it. The caress version is just a gimmick that I was curious about. The strata pillow is the important part.

So you'll spend about 250 or less

I think most massage tables today will hold up fine, it's the face cradle/pillow that can make or break a session imo so I didn't skimp on that. Good luck!

Thanks for sharing. I can understand what you said about looking in the mirror and seeing no hips. It's caused dysphoria for me as well. Your shape is divine.

Is standing for long periods of time an option or do you need to be laying face down? I was thinking of those stand-up desks, if they are an option? How else could someone work?

I wonder if a massage table would allow you to be more comfortable during the day. This one would let you read. I'm sure a table could be setup below to support laptop, etc.

You said you have to wear the compression garment for 2 months. Does that mean you can't sit for 2 months also?

Best of luck.

I purchased this for my wife and when I know she needs some attention and care I pull it out, turn the lights down low, put on some soothing music and some candles. I spend about an hour massaging her which means I only spend maybe two hours out of my day and it makes my wife extremely happy. Thats a great trade off to me. Not only does her body feel better but she knows that I care and that I see her stress/struggles/tiredness which I think means the most to her.

On top of that, bringing home flowers for no reason what so ever is always a good thing.

I recommend Best Massage tables on Amazon. Make sure you get one with a "Reiki endplate" that means there is an opening at each end to get your knees under when sitting. Many massage tables have an X at the ends and that is no good for Reiki. There is no need to spend more than $150 on a table..ever. I am a full time Reiki/energy healer and have been using the Best Massage tables for years.
https://www.amazon.com/BestMassage-Portable-Massage-Table-Carry/dp/B002YB0AHQ/ref=sr_1_10?keywords=best+massage&qid=1571107452&sr=8-10

I don't currently have any space concerns, I read the poang chair takes up more space than what you'd think. With the poang chair from Ikea, I was concerned due to it relying on laminated wood flexion as a support mechanism that would not be consistent over time.

With the zero gravity chairs, I was concerned about the longevity of the fabric quality due to wear and tear. Also, doesn't seem like most chairs would have good enough mounting points on the arm rests without modification.

I was kind of thinking of this chair, despite it looking a little cheap.

My logic for selecting a tattoo chair is that typically people stay oriented in only a few positions to receive a tattoo, so it would make sense that it would need to be fairly comfortable for a period of time.

Plus, I intend to get a butt-kicker or some other tactile transducer based system. It would seem that mounting to a metal support would more readily transmit vibrations than the wood of a poang chair, and mounting a tactile transducer system to a zero-grav chair seems like it would prove a little problematic.

Then there's the cost. The base cost of the poang seems to be lower than that of the others, but there's still shipping through Ikea which brings the total to $86.25.

Anti-grav chairs can be very cheap, which makes me worry about their build quality. I considered this one, but I like the price of the tattoo chair I mentioned above.

It seems almost negligible in price if I don't like the tattoo chair - I can easily afford a zero-g chair to try, and then I have a massage table for other uses. ; )

I would like the 6 dof chair. Haha.

I got a wheeled case back in may and I love it. Makes it much easier to get to and from clients apartments and it has a bunch of big pockets.

Master Massage Universal Wheeled... https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B001UE7D5A?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share

Here's another vote for Best Massage. It's a great table.

Sorry if this seems obvious, but maybe use a face cushion instead of a pillow? It has a cutout in the center that will keep you from smooshing your headphones when you lay on your side. https://www.amazon.com/Massage-Universal-Headrest-Cushion-Table-black/dp/B00Q5KEEY2

I'd suggest you take off your headphones when sleeping though, but it's up to you. Better headphones than IEMs, right?

Watch YouTube videos as many others suggested and also get a home massage kit, it comes with adjustable facerest directly hooked to your mattress, super portable and less hassle than the massage table.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B004GG9ECY/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_c_api_i_cedXDb0H6W0KN

I purchase one of these a few years back so I could work on my husband at home. It works great, but is a tad narrow. 100% worth the money and when I bought it, it was $130. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00IXWE1HK/ref=twister_B00PHK1G5Q?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00F575N1E/ref=twister_B00GSLSDZY?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1 "148.99" https://www.amazon.com/Pro-Premium-Flannel-Sheet-Piece/dp/B00E3RZ0DS "19.99" https://www.amazon.com/Therapists-Choice%C2%AE-Massage-Table-Fleece/dp/B003EMVYEC "6.99" https://www.amazon.com/Master-Massage-Beauty-Rolling-Hydraulic/dp/B00HVHAF6O?th=1 "72.23"
148.99 19.99 6.99 72.23 Equals: $248.20
Selling the set for $200 :)

Looks like some kind of massage table, probably customized or sold for bdsm

i used this one that i bought on amazon.

https://www.amazon.com/Massage-Portable-Adjustable-Folding-Facial/dp/B00K0OW60I/ref=sr_1_3?crid=2ONVOV3YWN1O1&keywords=best+massage+table+portable&qid=1565619094&s=gateway&sprefix=best+massage%2Caps%2C196&sr=8-3

I bought this one and my SO and i use it for massages and post massage naps. Not that much money, folds up in the closet, sturdy, and would be totally comfortable for a face down nap. My gf was skeptical but after one massage/nap she was on board.

You wouldn't believe it, but they are almost an impulse purchase in the Internet age.

http://www.amazon.com/Portable-featured-economical-available-anywhere/dp/B00K0OW60I/ref=sr_1_4_s_it?s=beauty&ie=UTF8&qid=1465257985&sr=1-4&keywords=massage+table

It is the face-hole for a massage table, without the pad.

https://www.amazon.com/Saloniture-Adjustable-Massage-Cradle-Pillow/dp/B07G2WJXWP

Just an FYI, but check Amazon. We bought our table from there. It was like $75 and prime so 2-3 day delivery. My wife and I are "full figured" and it holds us no problem. Here's the link : https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00K0OW60I/ref=cm_sw_r_other_apa_xFPtybYHTVW77

Coconut or almond oil

Either put down some towels or a crappy blanket or buy a cheap massage table and enjoy.

Get them moving and exercising. Got my Mom a stationery bike and a physical therapy table like [this] (https://www.amazon.com/Massage-Stationary-Physical-Therapy-Memory/dp/B00K2OITES/ref=sr_1_6?keywords=physical%2Btherapy%2Btable&qid=1567282200&s=hpc&sr=1-6&th=1), she has bad knees. Told her that if she wasn't sweating she wasn't exercising.

Learn a language, do crossword puzzles. Check with a gerontologist for more ideas.

Combined with this very inexpensive massage table, flying games could be ridiculously immersive.