(Part 2) Reddit mentions: The best books about mental health

We have a very good understanding of their intelligence. They are probably some of the most well studied species in terms of behaviour and cognitive abilities on this planet. In ELI5/TLDR* most researchers would characterize their intelligence of being equivalent to a 2-3 year old human child. Just a short list of things that characterize these species:

• They form long-term social bonds and remember individuals
  
  
• They are able to recognize self from other
  
  
• They are able to lie
  
  
• They are able to understand fairness
  
  
• They are able to make, modify and use tools
  
  
• They have culture and tradition
  
  
• They are able to demonstrate empathy
  
  
• They feel the same or similar emotions to humans
  
  
• They have morals
  
  
• They mourn the dead
  
  
• They are able to solve multi-step problems
  
  ...
  
  I suppose another way of looking at this is what do we have that they lack. What makes humans unique?
  
  We know of some factors that contributed to our awareness and unique intelligence as compared to other living species. It is important to know that this is a very active area of study in many different disciplines (psychology, biology, animal behaviour, psychiatry, physiology, anthropology, neurology, linguistics, genetics, archeology...).
  
  
• Traits we inherited from our distant ancestors. Obviously all species are a cumulation of inherited traits. Who we are today is largely due to who "we" were in the distant past. We inherited a strong tendency to be a very social species from our mammalian ancestry. Mammals are social beings, humans included. We inherited opposable thumbs from our early primate ancestors. Humans are not the only species with opposable thumbs so it is not a trait that is unique to our species. However, the inheritance of thumbs enabled us and the other primates to develop fine motor skills like precision grip. This enables us to manipulate objects, and make/modify tools. Humans also inherited an upright bipedal posture from our early ancestors. Humans are not the only bipedal species (after all, all birds are bipedal!) but our upright posture has given us many advantages, namely that it frees our hands to do other tasks.
  
  
• Brain/body size ratio & exceptional brain gyrification is a somewhat useful indicator of how intelligence a species is. The correlation is decent among related mammal species, but it breaks down when applied to distantly related animals. It underestimates intelligence in heavy animals like horses and overestimates small animals like mice and birds. You also have to consider what the animal's brain has evolved for. Bird's typically have very large brains for their body but may not be exceptionally smart. A lot of that large bird brain is used for flight calculations and isn't available for higher level processing. Fruit flies have enormous brains compared to their mass, but that brain is simply too small to have any real thought processes. Humans are highly intelligent because they have an extremely large brain for their normal body mass and that brain has evolved specifically to perform complex thought. Size isn't the only factor, scientists also consider the degree of specialization, complexity of neural connections, and degree of brain gyrification. Humans score high on all these physical qualifiers associated with increased intelligence.
  
  
• Two cognitive traits thought to be unique to humans - shared intentionality and cumulative culture. Shared intentionality goes one step further than being able to solve problems as a group, it involves anticipating the needs of others and the situation in order to solve a common goal. This requires incredible foresight, flexibility, and problem solving skills. It requires an almost hyper-sociality group structure. We couldn't stick 100 chimpanzees on a plane and expect it to land in one piece...but you can stick 100 human strangers and all, for the most part, get along just fine. This level of cooperation is rarely seen among other animals (save for the Eusocial insects, naked mole rats, and perhaps Callitrichid monkeys)...my point is we have a shared intentionality that allows us to be hyper-social and cooperative. Cumulative culture goes beyond the cultures exhibited by other animals. Other animals have culture where [non-essential] traditions are passed on from one generation to the next and can be modified slowly over many generations. Humans also have traditions, but these are past on much more easily between individuals. Moreover, these traditions are quickly modified, almost unlimited times within a generation. We are able to rapidly build upon the ideas of others and modify these ideas to suit new problems. Moreover, our adults, as compared to the adults of other species, are much better at learning and retaining new skills or traditions. Generally speaking, the age old adage "you can't teach an old dog new tricks" applies well to the non-human animal kingdom.
  
  These two traits, shared intentionality and cumulative culture, led to the development of other aspects of our being which are unique (e.g language). Everything else that we can do is just a happy by-product of these two traits: being able to go to the moon, or build a super dam, or create art, or think in the abstract, maths, industrial agriculture...Those things are by-products of our level of cognition. Our uniqueness is derived from shared intentionality and cumulative culture plus a couple of random physical traits that we were lucky enough to inherit from our distant ancestors - a big brain, bipedalism, and opposable thumbs. We are not the only species with a large brain-to-body ratio, we are not the only bipedal species, and we are certainly not the only species with opposable thumbs - these are physical characteristics that we inherited from our distant primate ancestors. These traits built the foundation for what was to come.
  
  Whatever the pressure around 40,000-50,000 years ago we notice a significant shift in the archeological record. All of a sudden humans are making cave art, our hunting tools are changing rapidly, we began to engage in long distant trade, we made jewellery and we even had symbolic figures - perhaps the seeds of language. This is known as the period of behavioural modernity. Not only did these humans look like us, they acted like us too. Its hypothesized that an infant from this time could be raised in a modern context with little to no intellectual deficit...we wouldn't be able to pick them out of a crowd. Humans haven't gotten more intelligent over time. It is hypothesized that a human from 50,000 years ago is anatomically and behaviourally modern.
  
  So, if we aren't any smarter - why do we have cell phones and galaxy print jeggings and people didn't way back then? Increasing complexity - we know more than people in the past because we've built upon what they've learned. Humans have always been smart, and our great benefit is that we build on other people's discoveries. Someone figured out how to domesticate plants, someone figured out how to sew cloth, someone figured out how to weave materials, someone figured out synthetic materials and dyes, someone put it all together in those jeggings. We just build on what other people have found out. This is cumulative culture in action. Humans today are not more intelligent than humans living 50,000 years ago - we both have the same potential. The difference between us and them is we have a wealth of shared knowledge to draw upon, and they did not. Humans 5000 years from now could be asking the very same question..."Why didn't they invent warp travel, its so easy!"...well we don't have the wealth of another 5000 years of experience and scientific study to draw upon. We only have what our ancestors gave us. As more and more knowledge is accumulated we should in theory progress faster and faster.
  
  Some interesting books on the subject:
  
  Age of Empathy
  
  Our inner ape
  
  Moral lives of animals
  
  Affective neuroscience
  
  Mothers and others
  
  

The ability to feel, to have emotions, are not limited to human beings. Other animals also have and express emotions, from reptiles, to birds, to mammals. However, one could argue that mammals do it best. Our hallmark is that mammals, humans included, are very social beings...with sociality comes the ability to feel complex emotions.

Affective neuroscience is a very interesting area of study which examines "the study of the neural mechanisms of emotion. This interdisciplinary field combines neuroscience with the psychological study of personality, emotion, and mood." It also examines how our own neural mechanisms are mirrored in animals (and especially mammals) because of shared ancestry. The study of motion is definitely a very active area of science that permeates many different fields - evolutionary biology, animal behaviour, human behaviour, animal communication, human communication, origin of communication, psychology, psychiatry, neurobiology...each look at different questions concerning emotions.

In ELI5 words this means that animals are certainly capable of feeling emotions because the neural mechanisms that produce emotions are conserved through evolution, and are similar to the neural mechanisms that produce emotions in ourselves. All mammals, being related through common ancestry, have even more similar and conserved mechanisms - humans are of course mammals too!

But a few things to note:

1. The way animals express a particular emotion may differ from the way humans express that emotion. For example, humans often smile to exhibit happiness. But for the rest of the primate order smiling is either a signal of submissiveness or fear. This does not mean that other primates are incapable of feeling happiness, but that they very likely express it in different ways from ourselves. We also have to be very mindful that other animals, even cognitively complex ones, may be physically constrained and incapable of complex facial expressions. For example, we know dolphins are capable of a lot of complex cognitive tasks, they are able to identify themselves in the mirror and they may even have names for one another...but they don't have the facial musculature to make the expressions that are, well, as expressive as ours. Their emotions may not even be obvious for this reason, but that doesn't mean they don't exist.
   
   
2. Humans like to make emotions poetic, like love. But love is simply a kind of attachment emotion. Humans become attached to each other and objects, sometimes to the point of obsession. Animals also become attached to each other. Mothers and their infants, bonding pairs of adults...all forms of attachment exhibited in the animal kingdom. Again if you were interested in studying love, as a scientist you would actually study attachment. I recommend the book affective neuroscience: the foundations of human and animal emotions. It can be rather technical, but it is very good read. In any case, if we want to objectively study emotion and their origins, we sort of need to take the "humanity" out of emotions and look at them in a more universal way.
   
   As to why emotions would be beneficial there are a number of good reasons. First, it allows social beings to create meaningful attachments to each other, strengthening group bonds. This may allow a group to be better able to accomplish a task, which may benefit some or all of the group members. For example, defending a food resource from a neighbouring group. Emotions might also help an individual remember a negative experience. For example, becoming frustrated when being treated unfairly. This might help an individual remember who is helpful, and who is not. Even if the animal cannot recall a specific memory, they may form impressions of individuals, in the same way human babies form impressions of those around them. Thus for a social being, emotions may help an individual form positive or negative associations with other individuals.
   
   Edit: For something a little more directed towards the layman, the moral lives of animals is a very good read, as is age of empathy.

There is no way of exactly knowing if an animal has theory of mind yet we can try to find out by using carefully constructed behavioural tests as well as including observational data on day to day behaviours of individuals. One example might be the mirror test: "to determine whether an animal possesses the ability to recognize itself in a mirror. It is the primary indicator of self-awareness in non-human animals and marks entrance to the mirror stage by human children in developmental psychology." However, the mirror test is biased in that it really only works for animals whose primary sense is vision. The previous wiki page provides a good starting point but I would also recommend other books by a number of scientists such as Age of Empathy or "Our Inner Ape" by Frans de Waal, "The Moral Lives of Animals" by Peterson. More specifically books like Primate origins of human cognition and behaviour or Animal Wise: where the author "explores how this rapidly evolving, controversial field has only recently overturned old notions about why animals behave as they do. She probes the moral and ethical dilemmas of recognizing that even “lesser animals” have cognitive abilities such as memory, feelings, personality, and self-awareness–traits that many in the twentieth century felt were unique to human beings.
By standing behaviorism on its head, Morell brings the world of nature brilliantly alive in a nuanced, deeply felt appreciation of the human-animal bond, and she shares her admiration for the men and women who have simultaneously chipped away at what we think makes us distinctive while offering a glimpse of where our own abilities come from."

First, it may be highly controversial to say this even here on r/askscience but humans are not the only animal on this planet to have theory of mind. Other animals can approximate the mental states of other individuals within their groups and can also understand the difference between the self and others. This effects how we view animals in a profound way, no longer is there a clear and defining "us" vs. "them". I can go into more detail but these previous books do a way better job of thoroughly exploring the subject from a laymans point of view. Consequently, humans seem to acquire these abilities sometime around 18 months of age. I also know that there is extensive literature on theory of mind in humans with autism, although I am not familiar with the details of this literature.

>What are the prerequisites for sentience, for example clothing or hunting techniques?

There is no one single "recipe" for having or acquiring theory of mind. I can tell you it has little to nothing to do with anything you see that is modern around you (i.e. cars, clothing, tools or hunting). This is because people (or groups of people) and other animals without these things still have theory of mind. Even oral or written language as we know it today is not likely a necessary precursor to theory of mind. We can still have complex thought or processing without the need for complex language. Does oral or written language enable us to communicate in a more efficient way? Yes. I still don't think you can equate the two - perhaps (human) language requires complex thought, but complex thought does not require language. Many scientists hypothesize that "theory of mind must have preceded language use, based on evidence of use of the following characteristics: intentional communication, repairing failed communication, teaching, intentional persuasion, intentional deception, building shared plans and goals, intentional sharing of focus or topic, and pretending." - all of these precede language and we see many of them expressed in animals, especially within the primate order. So first cognition then language.

However, animals that do have theory of mind tend to be highly social. Being social requires a lot of brain power in the sense that you have to be able to keep track of a number of individuals and your relationship to them. Long lived species need to keep track of these relationships through time. You also need to keep track of others relationship to other members of your group and you need to keep track of "outsiders" and "insiders". This stuff gets pretty complex. In order to navigate a complex social environment being able to tell yourself apart from others and even one individual from another is pretty critical.

> What differentiates homo sapiens from homo neanderthalensis in terms of intelligence?

First I would ask you to define intelligence. It's not so easy, so what I can do is explain the differences in behaviour based on what we have found in the archeolgical record:

• Neanderthals were able to use tools, well tools had been used by Hominins for millions of years by the time Neanderthals evolved and tool use isn't even unique to our lineage. But I digress, the tools used by neanderthals remained relatively consistent in design and use for their entire existence (from about 600,000 years ago to 24,000 years ago). On the other hand, human tool cultures were much more varied and were adapted to new environments. So humans have been described as better [tool] innovators than neanderthals.
  
  
• We lived in many different kinds of habitats and moved around a lot where as Neanderthals stuck to Europe. Therefore we have come to the conclusion that humans were better able to change our behaviour in order to survive in a variety of environments (tropics to temperate, deserts to alpine). We also had long-distance trade whereas neanderthal populations seemed pretty isolated from one another. Another indication that human oral communication may have been fast out-pacing the oral communication abilities of neanderthals (if they had them at all - some think that gestures played an important role in pre-language hominids, including early humans, in that they used gestures rather than words to communicate.)
  
  
• Neanderthals had jewellery, buried their dead, and probably made cave art etc. So they had some pretty complex cultures. But around 50,000 years ago human cultural activities exploded. There are statues, symbolic art, more complex burials etc. indicating a shift in our collective behaviour. This is known as behavioural modernity: "It is the point at which Homo sapiens began to demonstrate an ability to use complex symbolic thought and express cultural creativity. These developments are often thought to be associated with the origin of [modern] language...One theory holds that behavioral modernity occurred as a sudden event some 50 kya possibly as a result of a major genetic mutation or as a result of a biological reorganization of the brain that led to the emergence of modern human natural languages".
  
  
• The control of fire and cooking date back between 500,000 and 1.2 million years with H. erectus. Fire is not unique to humans (Homo sapiens) or neanderthals.

While I haven't dealt with this myself, after watching Hoarders, I became interested in the subject and researched it a bit.

I came across this website and this book. I admit I haven't read it yet, but the authors, Gail Steketee and Randy Frost, have great credentials.

What you must know is that your father cannot change on his own. He needs psychotherapy. Also, you and your brother need to go to counseling to undo the psychological damage done by your parents.

Also, as others have pointed out, you have to move out, regardless of whether your folks sell the house or not, because even if the deed and mortgage were in your fathers name, the house would still have to be cleared and fixed so prospective buyers could see it. But, why are you waiting for the house to be sold? What relevance does your dad's house have to you moving out?

Get a job, just any job and rent a one-bedroom apartment. Or find a two bedroom apartment and take your brother with you. And keep on applying to colleges. You have to do this, because you deserve a clean and healthy place to live in. A place to call a home, a place where you can feel relaxed and where you can invite friends. You deserve it and so does your brother. And you have the power to make it happen. You don't have to wait for your parents to do anything. You can do it on your own right now.

How about instead of:
>I aim to live somewhere that is clean, in good condition, where I can find everything and not trip over stuff, and looks like a house rather than a storage unit.

You would say:
> I will live somewhere that is clean, in good condition, where I can find everything and not trip over stuff, and looks like a house rather than a storage unit, and I will do it by september.

Make a plan and stick by it. And once you are out of the house you will also be able to help your father. Psychotherapy really works if he also agrees to go through it.

I think that you will have more strength in confronting your father, more energy, both physically and mentally to do so if you move out first. You said it yourself that the house is a drain on your health (due to allergy and asthma) and on your mind (because it is depressing).

Take care of yourself first and then you will be able to take care of others.

All this being said, a big internet hug and I really hope to see a positive update in a few months.

(continued)

>Are there any areas where you feel CBT or Hypnotherapy have significantly added to or expanded the ideas and techniques of Stoicism?

Yes. This is such a vast issue that it would take a very long time to answer this question properly, so I'll try to just make some brief comments. Modern psychological therapies are diverse and continually expanding, there are hundreds of books on CBT alone, so that in itself means there's always more and more scope for new comparisons with Stoicism. The Philosophy of CBT describes many points of comparisons between Stoicism and CBT, REBT, and hypnotherapy. In all of those areas, modern approaches and Stoicism offer different but perhaps complementary perspectives, and practical techniques. CBT practitioners certainly don't just "do Stoicism" with their clients, they use a vast array of different concepts and strategies, most of which would be of interest to Stoics. One difference is that CBT tends to focus on clinically-severe problems, diagnosable mental health disorders, which naturally leads to a different emphasis from ancient Stoicism. However, there's now more interest in applying CBT to "resilience-building", improving the overall wellbeing and resistance to stress of the normal population, and that's an area where the aims coincide more closely with the focus on traditional Stoicism. Stoicism has a fairly limited repertoire of practical techniques, which modern therapy has vastly expanded. We also have a fairly incomplete picture of Stoicism, unfortunately - only a tiny fraction of the ancient Stoic literature has survived. There was obviously a lot more to Stoicism than we know about. Chrysippus was one of the most prolific authors in the ancient world and yet virtually nothing of his remains. We could draw a huge list of CBT techniques that would be relevant to Stoicism but it would take time to explain them all. You probably want one or two examples, though, so here goes:

• Imaginal exposure. The discussion of premeditatio malorum ("negative visualization") by William Irvine and others seems very simplistic to a modern therapist and very lacking in terms of links to current research on similar techniques. The most robust finding in the field of psychotherapy, in this regard, is that anxiety (and sometimes other feelings) tend to "habituate" or naturally wear off during repeated, prolonged, systematic exposure to the stimulus (when certain factors are controlled). Clearly, if the Stoics repeatedly visualized misfortune one of the things modern psychology tells us is that their level of anxiety will tend to naturally abate, whether or not they directly attempt to challenge their thinking - and in some cases too much verbal rumination might actually prevent the natural process of habituation from happening. So most anxiety specialists would probably advise Stoics to learn a bit more about that process in order to engage in premeditatio malorum, and that the procedure should probably be prolonged beyond the point at which most people would normally stop, i.e., for about 15-30 minutes per sitting, or until anxiety has reduced by at least 50%, in order for lasting habituation to occur.
  
  
• Worry/rumination. In recent years there's been growing interest in the notion that traditional CBT may have placed too much emphasis on disputing the content of negative thoughts and not enough on managing the whole process of thinking, particularly learning to stop and interrupt prolonged episodes of worry (chains of thoughts about future catastrophes) or rumination (chains of thoughts analyzing past events). I'm sure the ancient Stoics make many passing comments that suggest they were "against" disputation or self-analysis being allowed to turn into prolonged worry/rumination. However, they don't give very clear and explicit advice on spotting and interrupting chains of thinking, which is perhaps a particular problem, an "occupational hazard", for philosophers! Again, tricky to be concise here, but learning to spot typical early-warning signs of worry/rumination spirals and then practicing postponing further thinking until a pre-specified time of your choosing is a common behavioural strategy (called the "stimulus control" method) for managing worry/rumination - although there are now many other methods being used for these issues.
  
  
• Learning to gain "psychological distance" (or "defusion") from thoughts rather than engaging in disputation of them seems particularly important in this area, something hinted at in the Handbook of Epictetus but not often brought up in discussions of Stoicism because it's a concept most philosophical commentators don't seem to be familiar with, although it's very important in modern CBT and behaviour therapy. Epictetus appears to say that the Stoic should spot disturbing thoughts and remind himself that they are mere appearances before attempting to dispute them. There's now some evidence to suggest that "cognitive distancing" (or "defusion") may be more powerful than previously assumed and perhaps more important in many instances than trying to question the evidence for thoughts or beliefs. There are lots of studies in this area now and we're learning more all the time about the factors that are relevant and the value of different techniques of distancing thoughts from reality.
  
  > What, if any, practices of Stoic life do you feel should be added to the general practice of CBT, to enhance its effectiveness?
  
  Good question. I'd have to start by explicitly saying that this is speculative and that I wouldn't recommend introducing treatment components to CBT in clinical practice until they've been tested. (Although, incorporating some Stoicism might often just mean making the sort of slight "tweaks" to established techniques, which nobody would think it's necessary to run a clinical trial before doing.) Some suggestions?
  
  
• Values clarification is absolutely integral to Stoicism, i.e., contemplating the nature of the good and acting with virtue. This wasn't really part of CBT, although something similar is now very central to Positive Psychology and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), which both evolve out of CBT. Being clear about what you value most in life and trying to act more often in the service of your values (or the virtues) is something that seems to mitigate against and depression and possibly generalized anxiety. It seems to me that expanding this aspect of CBT raises some of the best opportunities for explicit dialogue with philosophers, particularly Stoics. (See my book Build your Resilience for a detailed discussion of values work in behaviour therapy, with links to Stoicism.)
  
  
• Distinguishing between things under your control and things not, which I would call "control appraisal". Obviously that's fundamental to Stoicism; Shaftesbury even calls it the "sovereign" precept of Stoicism. There are traces of it in CBT, especially in a recent protocol (Dugas' method) for generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) but we could probably develop that concept and techniques derived from it much further in certain forms of CBT.
  
  
• The "view from above", as Hadot calls it, isn't a common strategy in Stoicism. It's not clear how it would function in terms of CBT theory but it's a very popular meditation and I think it deserves to be studied more systematically. It can be done simply by listening to recording, which is "gold dust" in therapy because it makes it extremely easy for clients to do it for ten minutes or so each day, with minimal training or preparation. (It also makes it much easier to do research on a technique if it can be administered with a standard recording: there's a complete script for this at the back of The Philosophy of CBT.) I've used this technique with hundreds of people over the years and almost everyone reports a sense of serenity that comes from it, and a shift in perspective. Technically, it may contribute to "cognitive distancing" but we need to be careful it's not misused as a form of "experiential avoidance", or a way to avoid confronting unpleasant thoughts and feelings.
  
  Moreover, there are lots of aspects of Stoicism beyond "technique" that add something of value, as I tried to emphasize in the introduction to Philosophy of CBT. The beautiful literature, the broad philosophical perspective, the sense of community with fellow Stoics - are all important things we don't really get from CBT.
  
  (continued)

Welcome to our sub! Just so you know, AD(H)D can absolutely be a factor in causing hoarding behaviors. Research shows that hoarders tend to have higher rates of ADHD (inattentive type).

I suggest that you take a look at these resources:

1. You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid, or Crazy?! by Kate Kelly, et. al.. Written by adults with ADD for adults with ADD, the is arguably one of the best books about ADD ever written.
   
2. ADD-Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life - recommended by the parent of one of our Redditors; the parent has AD(H)D and hoarding tendencies, and found this book extremely useful. They said it was a relief to read a book written for the way their mind works.
   
3. Organization Solutions for People with ADHD by Susan C. Pinsky.
   
   Also, ADDitude Magazine has some helpful articles geared towards folks with AD(H)D:
   
   
4. Stop the Slide from Clutter Into Hoarding
   
5. Find hoarding help in these 13 ADHD-friendly rules to organize your home for good.
   
6. Listen to Organization Solutions for People with ADHD with Susan C. Pinsky. In this hour-long podcast, learn efficient systems of organization, why adults with ADHD should strive for good enough rather than perfect, how to reduce clutter, and more.
   
   And see also:
   
   ADHD Podcast: ADHD Support Talk Radio - Clutter, Hoarding and Adult ADD / ADHD
   
   /r/ADHD is a support sub for people living with A(D)HD and may be able to offer advice on decluttering.
   
   Some folks with A(D)HD have found that using phone apps to tidy and stay organized helps, so you might try these:
   
   
7. UnF__k Your Habitat has apps for both the iPhone (listed as "Unfilth Your Habitat" to get around the iTunes naming rules) and Android. And the Weekly Challenges on their web site are a great place to find cleaning goals, as are their Basic Cleaning Lists.
   
8. Chorma - iPhone only. The app is specifically designed to help you split chores with the other person or persons living in the home. If you live with somebody and want to divvy up chores, definitely check it out.
   
9. Tody - For iPhone and Android. VERY comprehensive approach to cleaning.
   
10. HomeRoutines - AFAICT, this app is iPhone only. Again, android users should check out Chore Checklist (which is also available for iPhone) and Flyhelper (which is from r/hoarding favorite Flylady). These two apps are very routine-focused, and may help you with getting into the habit of cleaning.
    
11. Habitica turns your habits into an RPG. Perform tasks to help your party slay dragons! If you don't do your chores, then a crowd of people lose hit points and could die and lose gear! For iPhone and Android. There's a subreddit for people using the app: r/habitrpg/ (since the name change, there's also r/habitica but it doesn't seem very active)
    
    As a general rule, you want to START SMALL. You didn't get into this mess overnight, and you won't get out of it overnight. Rome wasn't built in a day. This is a marathon, not a sprint. Etc., etc.--my point is, it's admirable if you want to sail in and tackle it all at once, but that's a very, very tough thing to do, and not a recommended strategy.
    
    Big successes are built on top of little ones, so focus on the things you can do in under a few minutes. You'll notice that most of the tools listed above have you doing 10, 15, or 20 minute tasks. That's because bite-sized tasks are what help you feel a sense of accomplishment, which in turns helps you stay motivated.
    
    Personally, I'm a fan of the 40 Bags in 40 Days De-Cluttering Challenge. 40 Bags in 40 Days is a forty-day period where you declutter one area a day. It's an easy goal that's also easy to remember. The official challenge runs annually and coincides with the 40 days of Lent, but some people find it useful to schedule the challenges for themselves during other times of the year. See this post to learn more.

Please please get this book (Linked below) I have had too much experience with this. My uncle had Mad Cow disease, my grandfather had dementia now my mother in law has Alzheimer's. This book has been amazing, easy to read and very very helpful for every stage.

If you have children, dementia is the opposite. Instead of slowly gaining independence, they need to know it's okay to become dependent.

There's a really good Facebook group too, Memory Keepers Its private, but you just need to message them and they will add you. It's good to have a place to share, vent, find help etc.

It's been a great comfort to many of us in this situation. They would love this video.

And this is the best book to help you understand what is happening, will happen, and how you can help her and yourself feel better.

The 36-Hour Day: A Family Guide to Caring for People Who Have Alzheimer Disease, Related Dementias, and Memory Loss https://www.amazon.com/dp/1455521159/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_MuAKybN8XTCM6

Medication facilitates sufficient capacity but it does not compensate for deficient capacity. Medication helps what works in your brain to work more efficiently, without as much strain or effort, which means doing specific tasks on medication is less exhausting than completing those same tasks without medication.

However, medication does not create capacity. Nobody expects anyone to fit 20 gallons of garbage into a 13 gallon capacity garbage bag. ADHD affects the capacity of the frontal cortex. Some frontal cortex executive skills you will do easily and well, and medication will help you to utilize those strengths with greater ease. Lesser capacities might be enhanced with medication. There is simply no amount of medication, organization, facilitation or scaffolding to support those weakest capacities to make them as viable as your strengths.

To misunderstand conditions like ADHD and think the person just hasn't tried hard enough to overcome their weaknesses is like asking why someone can't just hurdle the Grand Canyon. It's ludicrous to suggest, yet our well meaning friends and family think they can help us overcome ADHD with just the right tools. My dog and cat could horde all the spoons they want, but without a thumb, they don't have the capacity to hold that spoon, thus use it properly. That is the reality of ADHD. You can make life easier, take medication to maximize what works, find scaffolding to support what is functional and learn what to avoid to prevent frustration and overwhelm. ADHD need not be debilitating, but it will be if we constantly expect opposable thumbs to grow where there wasn't one before.

I recommend this book to better understand the the role of executive skills in ADHD:

Smart But Scattered

Ditto checking out your local dept on aging. It might also be dept of elderly or eldercare or something like that. They may have info for you on website, in hardcopy, in person.. It varies by state. Some will have waitlists for help, some wont.

You can also find out if theres an Alzheimer's Association, Aarp, or similar near you, because they sometimes have free education seminars (sometimes to advertise services, but sometimes just info). Alz assoc also has support groups, which maybe you could use, for emotional support but also to find out about options near you. If there are care homes near you they sometimes host educational events there too. You could see if they have some kind of events calendar.

You might consider learning about elderlaw issues and getting an elderlaw lawyer. No doubt there will be free workshops featuring those. But theres a great deal of financial planning you may have to do, and sometimes you need stuff set up years in advance.

Finally, if there is a law school near you, they might have free information or downloadable publications to get you started. If you are really lucky maybe they have low cost options for law help bc they might have fresh students who need experience.

The classic text on Alzheimer's is the 36 Hour Day. https://www.amazon.com/36-Hour-Day-Alzheimer-Disease-Dementias/dp/1455521159
Tbh i never read it. But i know its like standard reading.

Get started on getting a lot of photos and videos and recordings of her. Its easy to not even think of this now. But id start now.

Ask her questions about what advice shed give you about stuff in your future, your life.. Ask about her past, her parents, her childhood.

If shes got old photos, find out about them. Its kind of a bummer to find an old album of people you don't know and have no one to ask. :p

Find out her favorite songs. Id be sure to get stuff from her teens to 30s. Try to compile at least 1 playlist. It may be helpful later, if shes in a bad mood.

If you wanna get really nuts you can look up clinical trials on trialmatch or clinicaltrials.gov and see if you feel like jumping in.

Don't beat yourself up if/when its time to make tough calls. This disease will put you guys in lose-lose situations, but you're not alone. It's going to suck, but you and dad and family can get through this.

Good luck.

> But if you're going to claim that "male brains are better at computers", you should describe the mechanism that makes this happen - "brains are different" is not enough.

Autism researchers have thoroughly documented this from every angle: higher testosterone levels predict higher systematizing ability and lower empathizing. Simon Baron Cohen, the preeminent expert in the field, wrote a great book on this: The Essential Difference. It is impossible to summarize it all but the evidence is overwhelming and incontravertible. Everything from the fact that male rats are better at solving mazes than female rats to the fact that babies who are exposed to higher levels of testosterone in the amniotic fluid spend less time looking at faces after they are born.

In any case, one theory he advances is that testosterone affects the laterality of the brain (left right symmetry and how specialized the brain is between the two hemispheres). The right side of the brain is more developed and more asymmetrical in males than in females. You can inject anesthetic into one side of the brain and women's linguistic ability is reduced evenly on both sides, while men have a much worse reduction if injected on the left (language) hemisphere and less reduction if injected on the right. The asymmetry extends to the entire body: men have slightly larger right foot than left while women have slightly larger left foot than right.

The whole book is fascinating and I highly recommend it. If you are interested in sex differences in the brain it is pretty much the modern encyclopedia and chock full of all sorts of curious and intriguing research (Did you know that men who have a bigger left testicle than right testicle do better on language tests? It's true!)

It sounds like you feel completely trapped and helpless, which is definitely a huge component of depression. I've been there, and it sucks. It feels like it's impossible to do anything to make your situation better because you don't have the energy or motivation, right?

Honestly the best thing you can do is get treatment for your depression - that's the major thing blocking you from making any changes right now. Are you seeking any treatment already? I don't know your situation or your parents, but the best solution would be to go to your doctor, start experimenting with meds to see if they help, and find a therapist to talk to. Failing that, use online therapy, or buy a CBT workbook, or even get one from the library. There's even a few great websites for CBT like https://moodgym.com.au.

Something clearly needs to change, and I really believe your depression is at the crux of all these issues. It's almost impossible to make other changes until your mental health improves. Good luck, and stay safe on your trip!

There are a plethora of books on consciousness.

From the science side of things the neuroscientist Antti Revonuso has a book "Consciousness: the science of subjectivity" which has a good mix of the philosophy and science of consciousness. Christof Koch, probably one of the leading neuroscientists who study consciousness, has a few books as well. The Quest for Consciousness is one of his, which has lots of neuroscience particularly visual neuroscience in it. That is mainly science, not much philosophy. Another neuroscientist who studies consciousness is Stanislas Dehaene who wrote a good book Consciousness and the Brain: Deciphering How the Brain Codes Our Thoughts. Click on the image of each book on the left in amazon (which opens up a preview) and scroll to the contents page and see if any of these books are the kind of thing you are looking for.

From the philosophical side there is (among many others) Susan Blackmores "Consciousness: An introduction" (an introductory book David Chalmers recommends) and William Seagers "Theories of Consciousness: An Introduction and Assessment". There is also a great book that has short (5-7 pages) sections on philosophers and neuroscientists and their respective theories of consciousness by Andrea Eugenio Cavanna and Andrea Nani called "Consciousness: Theories in Neuroscience and Philosophy of Mind". The first half of Michael Tye's book "Ten Problems of Consciousness: A Representational Theory of the Phenomenal Mind" is great for an overview of 10 philosophical problems of consciousness. It is very accessible and there are summaries of each problem provided. There are also great resources online such as Van Gulick's SEP article on consciousness, which would actually be a great place to start, and use it as a place to lead you to areas you are most interested in. Here is also a brief introduction to the philosophy of mind (the main philosophical discipline that deals with consciousness).

So there's a few links to some books and online articles, which should be more than enough to get you going.

By the way, there is a free masterclass on consciousness with Christof Koch on the World Science U website. You may also be interested in that.

Additionally you may like to check out the subreddit /r/sciphilconsciousness, which is all about the sharing and discussion of content related to the science and philosophy of consciousness.

>...really? My oldest source was published less than two decades ago and you're having problems with it?

Two decades ago we thought homosexuality was exclusively a choice, trans people were freaks, and that AIDS was caused by sex with monkeys. We've now shown that there is a genetic factor in homosexual and transgendered people (a.k.a. "It's not a choice, they can't just change") and have found a treatment for AIDS. In cobra venom. We also discovered much about physics, but there's too much to list.

>The proper term is human beings. Being a transgender person is normal human variation, it's not a "disorder", any more than being tall or short or having different eye colors or all the other numerous ways that humans vary from one another.

There are differences found in the transgender brain. There is something different. Not wrong, but different.

>Among twins there is over 99% incidence of having the same eye color, hair color, skin color, etc. etc. But there's only about 50% incidence of having the same sexual orientation. This means that it is not largely genetically determined. If it was, then we'd see over 99% of twins also share sexual orientation.

What I'm saying is that in two twins who have the same upbringing and social interactions, there is still only 50%. So it's not society. And if it's not society, and it's not biology, then maybe it's both?

>And as I explained, the problem with the Reimer case study is that the upbringing of the child was very atypical and not representative of the gender socialization that the vast majority of girls experience growing up, so there's no reason to expect the child to have that gender identity in the first place. And again, the understandings of the critical timings of when to administer hormones, what hormones to give, at what doses, etc. etc. were very crude at the time. We have advanced much in sexology and biopsychology since then.

Dr. Money specifically told the parents to treat Reimer as a girl, and his brother as a boy, for a control. David didn't learn the truth until his late teens. As you say, hormones could have also helped. Hormones are created by the brain, and are part of biology. The brain of a male produces more testosterone, and the brain of a female produces more estrogen.

>Well, whenever you're ready, feel free to provide links to these "new research" that you are referencing but never seem to provide a link to.

I can't give you a full read, but the study is available for you to find. Giving you the name is about the best as I can get. I read it in my library.

>And again, if you think the methodologies of the studies I cited are somehow flawed or their results are outdated, feel free to publish your findings in a scientific journal and collect your Nobel prize.

I really hope Nobel prizes aren't that simple.

Unfortunately, I don't know that there is a way to have that kind of mobility as a therapist, specifically (somewhat more mobility as a research-only PhD!). And, while I definitely think some of the license mobility stuff is arbitrary and unhelpful, some of it is definitely not. If you are interested, Crazy Like Us by Ethan Watters has a great example of how well meaning and perfectly qualified therapists can enter another culture and cause psychological damage due to their lack of understanding of interventions that are justified within that particular cultural context -- https://www.amazon.com/Crazy-Like-Us-Globalization-American/dp/1416587098

I don't know where you are at in your life currently, but it may be worth just living your life for a bit and taking time to clarify what your career values actually are. (E.g. if living in another country is a top priority right now, you could join the Peace Corps or something along those lines!) A career counselor might be good to chat with, as well.

tl;dr click the link, that's a useful book and has all of this, plus some more.

My minor in college was gerontology, and I was going to specialize in dementia care once upon a time. There's plenty of folks with advice in here, but I thought I'd add my two cents from that currently otherwise useless degree. There is unfortunately no reversing dementia, and if you can slow it down at all it's often imperceptible.

This will be awful and hard. Know that she will not know it's awful and hard in the end, and that's okay. Also realize that when it's at it's worst, she's not suffering - she doesn't know this is going on around her.

This is the best book I've read, and it is written in smaller pieces so you can digest one bit at a time - theoretically while caregiving, but it's also extremely useful in general. Most of what I'm saying is in there, and my MIL found it indispensible when she cared for her mom.

"Please affix your oxygen mask before assisting others" is key. You can't help take care of mom if you're falling apart. Neither can your dad, or whomever is the primary caregiver. Take days off.

Don't argue with her about what is real and what isn't when her memory starts to fade more thoroughly. She may not remember who you are, but she will remember you made her feel bad and avoid you. This is a must. Just agree and deflect, if you can. Reassure her and validate her on whatever she's worried about, and then ask about something else important. Comfort is key - go ahead and lie. You'll know when it's time for this.

Let her do as much as she can, as long as she can. This will help hold things together longer, both physically and mentally.

Keep stable schedules and locations for her. The longer she can use familiar context clues (TV in the corner, sun in the window, bathroom's in that doorway) to figure out what's going on, the easier it is on both of you. There may be a point this isn't possible, and that's okay too.

Episodic memory (stories, names, etc) fades long before procedural (riding a bike, etc), and both of those long before emotional memory (how things make you feel). Old ladies who can't remember what their own name is can often still cut up carrots for dinner without cutting themselves; they've been doing it forever. And they know they like the nice nurse with the pretty smile, although that they realize why. (Hint: she doesn't argue)

There will be good days and bad days. Don't feel bad about this, none of it is your fault. It's okay to be sad.

Remove throw rugs from her house as soon as she'll let you (or doesn't notice) - people with Alzheimer's often forget that they're old, and will accidentally hurt themselves. Falls are the most dangerous, and throw rugs the most common way to do so.

Her personality may change. Often people become angry, or curse when they never did before, or any number of things. This is okay too. Don't argue, agree and deflect: "Yes, mom, that is a bad f*cking movie, how about we watch the birds today instead, I like the red ones especially." (and then lead her away to the birds)

Alzheimer's patients can sometimes exhibit odd behavioral patterns. They will sometimes pack bags constantly, wander off without adequate preparation, sit at bus stops forever, or other odd repetitive behaviors. This is normal and it's all okay. If this gets dangerous, she either needs someone home all the time or to be moved somewhere with security for this issue.

I can't tell you what it's like - I didn't know my Grandma-in-law until she was already halfway through, so I didn't know she was missing anything. You will do the best you can with what you have available, and that is all anyone can ever do. This may be 5 years or 30 years long, and you will probably want a therapist to help you through it. It will be okay, although it will suck to get there, no lie.

Please let me know if you have any questions about any of this and I"ll be glad to help, anytime. If you know the specific disease, I can try and help explain that too, if you'd like. Good luck. <3

maybe you should try meditating? it takes some time getting used to but it should help you clear your mind. there are lots of apps for smartphones with guided mediations that are free.

another thing i can recommend is trying to do some at home CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) - there are loads of books online like this one and websites that can teach you basic ways to change your thought patterns as long as you're committed to it. ideally though, i think therapy would be a good idea, but i understand most students can't afford it :(

I don't have a lot of advice, but just wanted to pop in to recommend a book called Smart but Scattered, which gives you a very clear, methodical approach to supporting and scaffolding executive function skills in kids. I've found it a really useful insight into my son (and myself!). Good luck!

Probably a lot of readers of /r/water have read Cadillac Desert.

I own a copy of, and have made two false starts reading, The King Of California as recommend by the anonymous author of the blog On The Public Record.

I highly recommend A Great Aridness, a worthy heir to Cadillac Desert.

Also on my to-read list is Rising Tide. I would like to find a book that does for the Great Lakes what Marc Reisner did for water in the American West with his book Cadillac Desert.

A few things I've read this year that have little to do with water:

• The Sixth Extinction: An Unnatural History
  
• The Future of the Mind: The Scientific Quest to Understand, Enhance, and Empower the Mind
  
• The Human Experiment: Two Years and Twenty Minutes Inside Biosphere 2
  
• The Second Machine Age: Work, Progress, and Prosperity in a Time of Brilliant Technologies
  
• Citizenville: How to Take the Town Square Digital and Reinvent Government
  

I was just reading this book which was recommended on this subreddit (thanks guys!) and I found it kinda mind-blowing. The basic thesis of the book is that for people with ADHD, it's okay and maybe even a very good idea to sacrifice some aesthetics for efficiency. This means:

• as much as possible, purge (donate/trash) mercilessly, instead of finding space for stuff that you will then have to take care of, sucking up valuable attention bandwidth
  
• prioritize "easy to put away" vs. "easy to access": this often means leaving things organized but visible, even if they might be a bit more aesthetically pleasing in a closed container; hooks for hoodies and coats instead of a closet, open-front non-stacked containers as a middle ground between piles and cupboards, etc.
  
• get rid of the need for certain chores entirely if you can (having only one set of sheets in the rotation so you never need to actually fold your sheets unless you have guests or the stomach flu, lol; go down to one type of daily wear sock so you almost never have to actually match and roll sock pairs)
  
  With your guest bathroom, there might be a middle-ground solution (if you can afford the $10 I'd look in the section of the book under craft projects rather than under bathrooms, which is more about getting your bathroom routine down to the minimum possible and is aimed at folks for whom make-up is more functional and less of a "project", for lack of a better term).
  
  I found this a lot more relatable than Konmari, with its emphasis on kind of a devotional approach to housekeeping. I tried that sock and underwear folding method and like -- I'm glad I learned it (esp. for packing!) but as far as daily routine goes, it's the kind of thing that's out the window the second I get preoccupied with something else. Also in general we tend to be kind of hard on ourselves because our "resumes of failure" with organization/mess are kind of long, so it was really great to hear someone say "hey there are other options between Real Simple/Dwell centerfold and total grungey chaos and it's OKAY to use them!"

>In '87 we knew stormy weather was on the way, she would have known where her house was (presumably an exposed position), she may have even have known her roof wasn't in good condition. The subconscious is quite capable of putting all that together and once that happens it can end up in a dream.

I thought we were told that there was going to be no storm. Rather famously.

>She trusts her gut-instinct, which means she trusts the reasoning of her subconscious which can include dreams.

Interesting. I wonder what the ratio is between her bullshit dreams and the actual practical premonitions?

On that note, how far early did she dream? Was it that night or a week earlier? Why did she not take any action? Was she sure of it?

Has she entertained that her feeling of a dream may be deja vu? Does dreaming of a possible future have any benefits?

What is the difference of dreaming her roof might come off as it is weakened, knowing that there are storms coming, and someone worrying that their roof is not secure and knowing there are storms coming?

It seems the only real difference is the difference between conscious ability to think clearly, and some half assed ability to think about something abstract when you're asleep.

>Normally people balance subconscious reasoning against concious reasoning, and look for a concordance. If she's good at one and bad at the other, trusting her "gut" may even be the rational thing to do, but only if she doesn't have a rational explanation for it. From all the evidence in that blog post, that does seem to be the case.

Subconscious reasoning? It's not reasoning if it's subconscious. It's a different process entirely.

>She's only a local councillor, the decisions she's making are relatively simple. For a councillor I'd rather have an honest person who goes with their gut than a corrupt statistician.

Yeah. It's a funny thing going with your gut. Look at the wiki list of logical fallacies, that's thinking with your gut and it leads to wrongness. I read an interesting book on irrationality

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Irrationality-Stuart-Sutherland/dp/1905177070

It's funny how people's instincts can be so utterly wrong so often.

Nah, I don't want a councillor who's got tells her that' where there's smoke their's fire' or that someone looked dodgy because their eyes were too close together or that 'It's all these croatians innit?'

Not saying that's what she thinks.
But my gut tells me she's an ignorant fucking loon and my gut is never wrong about stuff like that.

My PhD thesis was on some of the core challenges with integrating a model of emotion (based on appraisal theory) with general AI like cognitive architectures.

Yes! The first two points reflect what others have stated that (and I think are spot on) and I'll introduce a 3rd point.

1. There's no reason to believe any process of the human brain cannot be captured as AI. This would only be challenged by ideas such as dualism, which most of modern neuroscience has abandoned.
   
   
2. Intelligence is useless without emotion - An important reason for this that has been mentioend is motivation. It doesn't stop there though. Based on Antonio Damasio's Somatic Marker Hypothesis, we believe emotions are fundamental to all rational thought, serving as a mechanic for dealing with limitless information to process. Think of it as generalized +/- information that serves as a heuristic to other rational processes.
   
   The exact nature of this is still under active investigation, but it's at least worth noting that evolution has developed emotion as a central aspect of our thinking for some reason. It also appears to be present in many other animals (though if that's true is up for debate), and its clear that those with impaired emotional processes cannot make complex decisions rationally.
   
   
3. What doesn't seem mentioned yet is a work done by the Affective Computing group at MIT's Media Lab: http://affect.media.mit.edu/ . In contrast to my work which seeks to synthesize emotions in AI first, they're more focused on giving computers the ability to perceive and display emotions. One of the major roles of emotion happens to be social communication (i.e., we don't just have emotion, but we also express it as a way of communicating information to others).
   
   In the simplest of cases, perhaps AI should understand when it does something you don't like by being able to detect when you're pissed off. More broadly, having an ability to understand and express emotion will do things like allow for an emotionally visceral experience while speaking with a robot, allow an automated customer service robot to understand when you are angry and thus change strategy (like route you to a live manager), or help older lonely patients feel like they're still needed in the world.
   
   ---
   
   In summary how it affects us is 2 ways:
   
   
4. Enable more general intelligent robots to be embedded in our world
   
   
5. Impove AI and human interactions

In-school counseling is good, but have you thought about taking him to an actual therapist? My daughter's seeing one who specializes in gifted kids, and it's been doing her a world of good. She's becoming more mature and responsible, her attitude toward academics has improved dramatically, and she's picked up a lot of empathy and understanding about how to interact with less-gifted peers.

Just as importantly, the therapist meets with my husband and me every couple of weeks to touch base with us about our daughter and to teach us how we should be working with her.

Mine is young enough that any specific advice from the therapist I could pass on wouldn't be terribly useful for dealing with a 6th grader, but I can share some of the books our therapist has given us about dealing with gifted kids:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0910707898/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o07_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1593634900/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o07_s01?ie=UTF8&psc=1

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0910707677/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o07_s01?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Sure, no one is denying that men and women are similar in capacity. I never said that they weren't. I'm not arguing that men are better at one thing and women are better at another. And sure, the nurture part probably has a lot to do with that stratification of why in the end men tend to do better in some fields and women do better in others.

My argument as to why this socialization occurs is due to societies desire to create environments which are conductive to specialization of the natural desires each gender tends to gravitate towards.

My argument, is that nurture is more of a reflection of nature, in that nurture is trying to be conducive of the natural tendencies between genders. For instance, here is a study (there are many of them) on the effects prenatal testosterone has on the mind: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17074984

Basically, the behaviors, psychology, and other such characteristics in the child are directly correlated with testosterone levels and timing of introduction during the fetal development cycles.

Or Simon Cohen's peer reviewed work on the differences in male and female brains which he wrote a book on: http://www.amazon.com/The-Essential-Difference-Female-Brains/dp/046500556X

He shows through several different studies, going starting all the way from day one of the child's birth, that there are core differences in the brain between genders in what they do, behave, and gravitate towards.

Again, I'm not saying one gender is BETTER at some things. For instance, both genders are just as capable at doing things like math and programming. However, naturally, males will gravitate towards those fields do to their psychological make up through biology, so it makes sense that society creates an environment which fosters those tendencies in the name of efficiency.

Women can still become programmers if they choose, nothing is stopping them. But yes, it's true that they will have a harder time, because they are an outlier and society has created a structure to be more conductive to men in this field, so naturally men will have the upper hand here (The same way becoming a famous athlete will be easier for men because men tend to gravitate towards sports, thus the institutions are based around male sport competition). But that can't be changed. Society can't adjust it's entire system just to account for the outliers. If society did try to create a system of pure equality for both genders for, say, programmign, you'd find that men still would naturally gravitate towards it and take up an overwhelming majority of the spots, while women would take more than they do now, but still be a huge minority. And in the end, society would be wasting resources trying to create an even 50/50 split. It's just wasteful and inefficient.

I found the book Stuff: Compulsive Hoarding and the Meaning of Things to cover the psychological roots of hoarding more than the others. Buried in Treasures: Help for Compulsive Acquiring, Saving, and Hoarding is more of a workbook for groups to go through. I haven't seen Treatment for Hoarding Disorder: Workbook (Treatments That Work) yet and am surprised I hadn't heard of it.

Here is the OCD Foundation's main page for hoarding They have support groups listed somewhere on the site. Clutterers Anonymous also has good literature. We use things from both groups at our meetings. CLA has online and phone meetings IIRC.

We like Cindy Glovinsky's books a lot too. She has a good sense of humor. One Thing At a Time: 100 Simple Ways to Live Clutter-Free Every Day is short sections of tips and how tos for overcoming the issues. I also really like her Making Peace with the Things in Your Life: Why Your Papers, Books, Clothes, and Other Possessions Keep Overwhelming You and What to Do About It.

I haven't spent much time on the hoarding subreddits. One of them tended to be more people asking for help dealing with their hoarding relative. The other was geared more for the hoarders. IIRC, one is r/hoarders and the other is r/hoarding. There's probably more.

Sounds like me a few years ago! Not sure what country you’re in because it means different access levels. My GP in Canada sent me to a specialized adhd clinic for rigorous testing which cost me a cool $1000. My bf managed to find a psychiatrist who was covered by the provincial drug plan and cost nothing. So you could ask your GP for a referral to a psychiatrist, conversely you could try asking for a referral to a psychiatrist at a walk in clinic.

This will be a tough road and honestly it’s going to come with a lot of judgement because you’re still “school aged” and even when you’re not, because the medication is a controlled substance you’ll get judgy reactions from pharmacists, insurance companies etc etc because they’re jerks and they just think we’re trying to get high on a medications we rely on to get through the day. Obvs not all are like that. I’m only saying this so you can be prepared to stand your ground and remember it’s ok that you’re seeking treatment to better yourself.

So until you are able to secure a diagnosis (keep pushing because it’s so important for your success if you do have adhd!) there are a few resources that really helped me you can check out:

I always want to be where I’m not: https://www.amazon.ca/Always-Want-Where-Not-Successful-ebook/dp/B00K1LGMJG

Fast minds: how to thrive if you have adhd or think you might: https://www.amazon.ca/Fast-Minds-Thrive-Think-Might/dp/0425274063

Driven to distraction: https://www.amazon.ca/Driven-Distraction-Revised-Recognizing-Attention/dp/0307743152

I hope you find a bit of peace in a few of these things, and remember that you know yourself the best, keep pushing until you find someone that will listen to you.

This is a copy paste of an email I've sent a couple of friends. My child has dyslexia and I found these resources useful. The Amazon links are not affiliate links or anything, just links to the books. The first two books were especially intersting and useful, and will apply even as an adult!

Dyslexic Advantage - by Brock and Fernette Eide


Overcoming Dyslexia - by Sally Shaywitz - the first part of the book is the most interesting - it's the science of dyslexia - the second is strategies for teaching/learning


Some other books:
I read them all - at least mostly - but I can't separate the info in my memory to remember which was best at what

• http://www.amazon.com/Bright-Kids-Who-Cant-Keep/dp/1609184726
  
• http://www.amazon.com/The-Dyslexia-Empowerment-Plan-Confidence/dp/0345541235
  
• http://www.amazon.com/Smart-but-Scattered-Revolutionary-Executive/dp/1593854455
  
• http://www.amazon.com/Right-Brained-Children-Left-Brained-World-Unlocking/dp/0684847930
  
  Some good websites:
  
  
• http://dyslexia.yale.edu/
  
• http://www.davidsongifted.org/db/Articles_id_10435.aspx
  
• http://www.dyslexia.com/library/symptoms.htm
  
• https://www.understood.org/en
  
• https://www.understood.org/en/tools/tech-finder
  
• http://www.dyslexiaresourcegroup.com/
  
• http://dyslexia.yale.edu/EDU_signs.html < the yale site is good in general
  

First, there is nothing un-Stoic about seeking support and psychological help when you need it. Please, get evaluated for depression. If you are sympathetic to Stoic philosophy, then a therapist who uses cognitive behavioral therapy might be good choice; it borrows several central Stoic ideas, and is generally well aligned with Stoic philosophy. (See this book and others by the same author.)

For more explicitly Stoic advice for the very general question:

1. Step back from yourself, and consider your situation objectively and dispassionately, without judgement.
   
2. Act responsibly, fulfilling your roles in society wisely, justly, courageously, and self-discipline. When you have "too much time" -- no obvious responsibilities in your existing roles -- take on new roles that fit your strengths and weaknesses and benefit society. You can always volunteer.
   
3. Embrace the consequences, whatever they may be.
   
   I go in to more detail in this post.

There is so much research on this, how anyone can look at that and condone letting infants cry is beyond me. Must be serious compartmentalization.

I recommend reading this

Don't mistake it for yet another how to parenting book, it gives a full history stretching over the last century of the development of attachment theory ( not to be mistaken with attachment parenting, NOT the same) and is full of research. It's not the easiest read, but readable nonetheless.

A lot of people believe that emotional self regulations happens if you simply let the child be on its own, waiting for the infant or child to figure it out. This is not true. Through the soothing of the parents, earlier on mostly through holding,touching, feeding, making sounds, mirroring the child's emotions, the child eventually will be able to internalize this model...and then start self soothing gradually. This is crucial for healthy development.

Just love your baby and hold it all the time, kiss it all the time, go crazy over it. It's all good, it's how it should be. Even when you're tired now, one day you won't be anymore and you will not ever regret having done it this way.

"Happiest Baby on the block" or " the no cry sleep solution" have some methods gently help babies sleep more. Might be worth a try.

It makes sense. I think you had good intentions: staying busy and working hard. It's just there's a balance. And while a good distraction here and there might be nice, you don't want to avoid the proper dialogues you need to have with yourself.

I'm a big fan of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Instead of tracing things back to the source, it focuses on what to do in the moment when triggers flare. I like the book Retrain Your Brain because it goes through the CBT stuff in an easy to read and digest manner. Not too theoretical. Each chapter had me nodding with how it made sense. See if your library has a copy.

If you're a more auditory learner, try listening to one of Noah Elkrief's videos. I'll link this one How to Forgive Yourself.

I'm usually wary of any life coachy type of talk, and Noah doesn't seem to have and therapist credentials. That said, if you listen to a few of his videos, he seems to ask the right questions. And you'll notice he repeats certain themes a lot... Because those are the questions you need to ask yourself.

Good luck!

During my SCID-D assessment, it was suggested to me that I have a 'reporter part' who has the job of watching things and keeping track of what is going on. I'm not that part, but I wanted to say that we love that part a lot and think they're really special and important. They feel unreal a lot but we wouldn't be here without them.

When I feel bad about dealing with it, I like to read some books on DID or lurk on this sub to remind myself I'm not alone. Child parts distract themselves with fantasy stories or young adult novels. Also, grounding techniques that use different senses can help too. Lately I've been getting a bar of chocolate and I'll do some colouring or listen to music. If that doesn't help, I'll play with the cat, call a friend or go to sleep. There's a book on coping with dissociation that has lots of things to try.

The part I mentioned doesn't find it easy to do any of these things because they don't really have any motivation or feel any enjoyment, but we have a rule that you just pick something and try it for ten minutes and if it doesn't work at least you tried. We're not actually very good at it, but that's the idea.

Good question and I should qualify I’m not a physicist but Dr. Michio Kaku wrote a pretty good book outlining his reasons why that statement is true. The Future of the Mind Great read.

Edit: Name spelling

Hi there! Lemme just say I'm happy to hear you're in a good place and looking to continue healing and learning. Congrats for getting to this point, and I hope your journey goes well from here!

As far as book recommendations go, several people here are reading Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation and come together for a weekly book club thread (run by our very own u/puppydeathfarts .) If you're looking for a good book to dive into with people who can relate, I'd recommend joining!

Only studied it as part of my foray into eastern philosophy. I "came back" with more of an interest in Zen Buddhism rather than Taoism.

Recently I've found in Stoicism the bits I enjoyed in Zen Buddhism, and then some.

Pretty sure Stoicism -- which is not actually about quelling your emotions, as popular understanding would have it-- would be a better fit for INTPs, if not people in general.

Recommended reading is this book on the similarities between Stoic thought/practice and modern cognitive behavioural therapy. It dispells a lot of myths about stoicism and puts it's tenets in a modern perspective.

Hey. It is not cool to downvote people for trying to have a discussion and for offering valid counter-points. Tom921992 raised an interesting and relevant question. If that makes you feel bad, perhaps examine why you felt that way? No need to be insecure. With, or without a definition of spirit, Aya is still Aya. Also, Happy Cake-Day, OP!

--------

I think it depends on what you define a 'spirit' as. Westerners love to anthropomorphize things. We want our spirits to be visible, coherent, and lucid -- like meeting another human being, only as spirit. If you detach from your axis and explore this school of thought, you realize how many pre-conceived filters and biases you have running on-top of your experience.

While aiding Ayahuasca ceremonies in Peru, many people pose these questions. It is often phrased as: "Is this really happening to me, or is this just my imagination?" The imagination is the container where these experiences take place. You are imagining what you are seeing. That does not invalidate or reduce your experience.

A spirit is a different being. A practitioner or an explorer might abstract these sensations into a form that is understandable and communicable. It is always a reductive process. But, if you want to meet a plant spirit, the imagination is the membrane in which a non-human entity converses with a human entity. Its form, approach, and discourse is going to be unique to the observer.

As a takeaway, I think it is important to realize that the best anyone can understand about Ayahuasca is Ayahuasca plus them. In no way can we explore and understand the medicine and the experiences without our own spirits present. In this way, a true objective scientific analysis is a major challenge. The debate will become epistemological in short order.

If you are interested in some deep reading, I would recommend The Antipodes of the Mind by Benny Shannon. This is a hard-science book. It is an rigorous phenomenological analysis of Ayahuasca experiences over many years, in many different contexts. Another way to philosophically approach Ayahuasca and its experiences is through that of Platonic epistomology.

Enjoy your journey!

I initially followed the principles of Stoicism, which is a philosophy that's very close to the principles of CBT. So my first resource was /r/Stoicism, where you can find things like this and this that have direct correlation with CBT principles. Greek and Roman literature might be hard to get into, but there are very readable translations and the principles are applicable.

Of course, not everyone is interested in philosophy, so my recommendation would be to find something along the lines of Judith Beck's Cognitive Therapy, or other similar resources that are based on research. I can't really recommend else because I haven't read much from other authors.

But in general I would recommend reading about cognitive biases in general, along the lines of this, this, this, or this. Being conscious of how everybody thinks might help you see some negative spirals in your life, and can help you change the environment that might lead you to that negativity.

But again, professional help can be very useful, so definitely consult a professional who is maybe better for you. Good luck!

I second becoming familiar with alz.org. Also, The 36-Hour Day is a great book with lots of practical advice.

As for making your mom feel comfortable about it, it seems to me that everyone experiences Alzheimer's differently. My husband didn't realize that he had it and we never mentioned it. His decline was very slow so it was easy to gloss over his loss of abilities one by one in very small steps. What might at first seem horrifying — like having to shave him or take off his socks for him — turns out to feel like normal routine when there's a long transition and when you go about it matter-of-factly.

Help your mom to save face whenever possible. I remember telling my husband, "Gosh those new socks are so tight, a person needs help getting them off..." Don't draw attention to her forgetfulness, just go along with it. If she asks you the same question six times in a row, respond each time as though it were the first. You can get into a dreamy sort of rhythm that is actually pleasant instead of frustrating.

Hello there! Stay with that hope, because the journey is long.

I suggest cognitive therapy. But aside from that I think you would benefit from learning about attachment psychology. I feel like many ACoNs had what is referred to as an "anxious" attachment in childhood; "preoccupied " as an adult. The feeling of being unlovable is a hallmark of this, and stood out to me! I do think change is possible, but it's challenging. On the off-chance you or another may want it, here are a couple of related resources:


The test of your adult attachment style is here if you want it. If you find yourself interested in the subject as well and the mechanisms behind it I would heavily recommend reading Becoming Attached

Thanks I have alwasy had my ears and eyes open to those folk you mention. I recently read Antipodes of the Mind as I have alwasy been interested in Ayahuasca worth a look maybe even a purchase?

Still yet to get to Food of the Gods and the Spirit Molecule both worthy reads Im sure. Cant get enough of Alex Grets art either.

So this doc looks perfect for me. I think someting is telling me to go hunting for mushrooms this year. There is still so much to learn, its wierd how this mind state or way of life runs alongside my normal 9-5. I wish I could devot more time to these studies!

I don’t know your severity but I could recommend some workbooks to help, here’s one that has pretty good reviews online.

I always like to tell people that a therapist could be anyone/anything, not to downplay all of their hard work and dedication but in the very simplest form all they really did was study books that are available to you as well - you have the same capabilities to help yourself but it will take some time and work

Retrain Your Brain: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in 7 Weeks: A Workbook for Managing Depression and Anxiety

Sometimes I invite people over just so my place will get clean... jk but also it's kinda true.

I throw this book out here on this sub constantly (still waiting for my kickbacks...) but Susan Pinsky's book for organizing with ADHD literally changed my life. I'm still a hot mess, but everything is easier to clean and keep organized. I started going crazy when I transitioned to working from home full time. I need a clean environment to work but everything in my nature works against that. Her book really seriously truly helped me get things to a better baseline.

I can't link for some reason in-text, but here's the amazon link https://www.amazon.com/Organizing-Solutions-People-Revised-Updated-ebook/dp/B007ETD7GO

Well, you're definitely going to see your application take longer, as answering yes on any of those questions just automatically flags your application for review.

Honestly, as someone with the same diagnosis and even the same medication, I just wouldn't have even answered yes to that. As others have mentioned, that question is actually much more specific than just "mental health."

>16d) During the past five (5) years, have you threatened or attempted suicide, or have you suffered from or been diagnosed or treated by a medical practitioner for: depression; alcohol, drug or substance abuse;behavioural problems; or emotional problems?

ADHD isn't any of those things. Its a mental... impairment, maybe? Learning disability? Its not really any different than having bad eye sight. It negatively impacts your ability to get things done, but can be helped somewhat by medication. Its certainly not a behavioral or emotional problem.

If anything I'd say it would make you more safe with guns... the weird thing about ADHD is that while its very hard to keep attention on things you have no interest in, you can get super attentive with things you really like. If you really like guns and shooting, your brain is going to be in that second mode when handling them. To me, ACTS and PROVE isn't just stuff you have to do, its weirdly entertaining and cathartic to me because I'm interested in firearms.

Absolute worst case, the CFO might make you get a letter from your doctor saying you aren't a threat to yourself or others. Do let us know... I hope I don't have to go through some nonsense when I renew the PAL.

Sidenote unrelated to guns, check out this book if you haven't already. Its been very helpful to me.

Ask your mom to become educated about autism:

I bought everyone in my family a copy of this book, and when I told them I had autism, I told them the best thing they could do for me was to read this:

http://www.amazon.com/The-Complete-Guide-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1843104954

I am not claiming that this is the perfect book, but it is thorough, and learning about and understanding your loved one is often the best thing you can do for them.

I would rate the book 6.5/10. Here is an Amazon link if you would like to read more reviews.


If you haven't read many self-improvement books and lack a basic knowledge of ADHD then it is worth a read. The book has worksheets following each chapter and can be helpful in identifying behaviors and offering ways to correct them. I found the worksheets to be more micromanaging than I would like. This book would be a great read for a family member that does not have ADHD and would like to know the conditions impacts their loved one's life.

Not OP, but just wanted to add, there is a whole spectrum of attachment patterns ranging from secure to various forms of insecure, of which RAD (aka "attachment disorder") is just one extreme. It's quite likely that your son has some degree of disrupted attachment, due to the loss of primary caregivers so early in his life, but that doesn't at all mean his trajectory will look anything like RAD.

As /u/groundhogcakeday said, read up on the attachment styles (this wikipedia article is a great place to start, or for a thorough primer on attachment theory, check out Robert Karen's Becoming Attached) and see what resonates. And don't hesitate to consult with a child psychologist who is familiar with early trauma and attachment disruption, even if your son doesn't have anything extreme going on it can't hurt to get some coaching.

Thank you ☺️

And absolutely! I bought this book:
Retrain Your Brain: Cognitive... https://www.amazon.com/dp/1623157803?ref=yo_pop_ma_swf

I actually think I found it through someone else on this sub. It breaks down CBT in a way that allows you to “be your own therapist.” It guides you through 7 weeks the same way a therapist would: how does anxiety/depression affect X area of your life, what are your values, what are your goals for the next 7 weeks across all areas of life, track your activities/their importance/your enjoyment level, etc.

I’m only on week 2, but already I can see a difference in how I react to my anxious thoughts. At first I didn’t think the book would be right for me. A lot of the examples given are simplistic, more geared toward people with specific phobias, not GAD/panic disorder, etc. but once I got deeper into it I realized that it’s actually a great place to be honest with yourself and confront your anxiety in a non-intimidating way.

I would definitely recommend it!

Hi there! I was kinda where you are now, on the diagnosis part of the journey, last year. Thought it would be just PTSD. I remember being super freaked out by it, like, deeply unsettled, for quite a while. I couldn't stop thinking about the diagnosis (DID), what it meant about my past, and also my future, my relationships, my life. I'm sorry you're going through that now too. If it in any way helps, I'm okay. My marriage is good, career is great. My day to day amnesia is nowhere near as bad as it was in the past. My overall mental health continues to get better the longer I work on it. You are not incurable: the fact that you have a diagnosis is a HUGE first step towards recovery.

I won't lie to you and say it's easy. It's hard, especially at first. I recommend this book for noobs :) The "look inside" feature will give you access to the first 4 chapters, which includes understanding dissociation, the symptoms of each dissociative disorder, what dissociative parts really are (not the weird shit you see on youtube), and what having DID can do to complicate, mask and/or amplify PTSD symptoms.

Chapters include exercises like the one you already described doing with your therapist, as well as some homework exercises and thinks for you to think about. You don't have to rush into ANY of that. Maybe just check out the symptoms of the condition and think about how it maps to your own experiences.

Your therapist described the diagnostic bit pretty well: it's a scale, and the more severe your symptoms/the more criteria you meet, the further along it you go. If you have OSDD, it's assumed you may experience all of the symptoms of the others, so you only need the "last in line" diagnosis. (These are totes not the medical terms for this, sorry).

What are you most worried about? Is there anything I could share about my experience that might help?

Edit: and practice your safe place thing, it might not feel like much now, but it works if you stick with it

Well, I never said I believe that the songs actually communicate with the spirits or heal anyone. I can state however that shamanic singing can OBJECTIVELY modulate the experience of a group of people on Ayahuasca.

Over the course of a given ceremony, Icaros directly control the 'journey' of everyone participating. The shamans employ different Icaros at different times for different effects. Some of them bring you 'up' some of them bring you 'down'. Some of them them encourage introspection, some laughter, and still others intense visualization or body effects. They do this group modulation with intention and know exactly what they're doing.

If you don't see how something like that is possible, then yes, we do need to agree to disagree for now and I suggest you get some education. :)

Sure! Right now I like these Yoga With Adriene videos: Gentle Yoga, and Yoga for Loneliness (I like that this one is low to the ground and pretty much all done on your back). I also like these Somatic Exercises for neck and shoulders.

The book I like best for explaining dissociation is Sensorimotor Psychotherapy by Pat Ogden/ Janina Fisher. The book is huge and a little pricey, but that's because the format is supposed to be like a workbook for client and therapist. You don't have to go through the exercises (I don't) but my therapist utilizes a lot of sensorimotor psychotherapy ideas and techniques in our work and I bought the book because there's just so much great information in there about dissociation and how trauma gets stored in the body. There's also a workbook that I recently bought that's pretty good so far: Coping With Trauma Related Dissociation.

Look into your local Alzheimer's Association - they have meetings for family members, as well as activities for the person diagnosed, depending on how severe their condition is. Click on the "in my area" tab to find your local chapter.

I also always recommend The 36 Hour Day - it's a great primer on what to expect, and it gives some advice on different options for paying for care. Good luck, and we are here for you and your dad!

Thank you for the sources. Globalization of law...that would be such an interesting topic to research. Plus, travelling/living outside of the US is something everyone should do more of.


You would love Crazy Like Us, which deals with the fascinating topic of the globalization (read: americanization) of psychological diagnosis.

Oh, believe me (or don't) I've spent many hours studying the subject of cognitive dissonance, if you or the people out there would like a good primer on the subject this is a great book about it. And I agree Fox likes creating what's called a siege mentality within it's viewership and itself, their level of intellectual dishonesty is quiet nauseating.

Maybe. It could be that the "electro" part, the "chemical" part, or both will eventually be considered necessary causal factors in thoughts but not integral to thoughts. Same goes for the action-potential-synchrony which appears to play a role.

We do know a lot of stuff which could be involved in thoughts, but most of our conclusions are very tenuous.

This is a good book for a scientifically literate lay-person who wishes to familiarize herself with our present physiological knowledge about thoughts.

After you read that, read this, and then, if you really want to go deep, this.

[Edit] One more thing: The neocortex (the thin sheet of neurons that covers the surface of your brain - it's about as thick as a stack of 6 playing cards) appears to have primacy in the creation of thoughts. Something mysterious happens there that seems not to happen elsewhere in the brain, at least to the same extent.

follow up question:

During my first ceremony, the first thing that happened to me was that I felt an extremely comfortable, mother-like vibe, and I knew I would be okay. After reading http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0199252939 , I learned that is extremely common for people to encounter (mama ayahuasca) their first time. Did you have a similar feeling? Just a comfortable, euphoria, a motherly vibe?

I’ve been reading a book on organizational strategies for people with ADHD (I think it was this one, but I don’t have it with me at the moment, so I’m not 100% sure), and it said something that seemed pretty profound to me: if you struggle with organization, it’s okay to stop trying to do things the “right” way, and instead do them the way that’s right for you.

So, for example (a few ideas based on what you wrote):

• If your bathroom has two loads of laundry worth of dirty clothes on the floor, then it sounds like you tend to change/take off dirty clothes in there. Cool! That’s a routine you can work with. You can put a hamper in there and toss your dirty clothes into it as easily as tossing them on the floor in the same place. The book kind of points out that a lot of the time our systems fail when we make them hard, and for people (especially those with ADHD; not sure if that applies to you), attempting to do things the traditional way may make them too difficult or awkward to ever succeed. If your laundry basket/dirty clothes hamper is in a place that’s awkward for you, you may never end up using it. But you can put it where you’re tossing dirty clothes anyway and it’s 100% as valid of a placement, but much easier!
  
• Or if you struggle with having a place to put clean clothes once they’re clean...do you need to actually put them away? Could you just have a clean laundry basket (or several) that they live in until you wear them, or a plastic tub (or several) with a lid on it to keep the bugs out? They might be wrinkled, sure, but they’d be clean, and you’d know where to find them. Or maybe this $13 clothes rack from Walmart (we have one, it’s great and WAY sturdier than I expected!) and a few packs of cheap hangers would let you hang everything up (even the stuff that doesn’t usually get hung up), so you can see all of it and know what’s clean.
  
• And if you struggle with washing the dishes, and can afford to, could you switch to paper plates and plastic utensils for a while (or permanently)? It would cost more money than reusing permanent dishes and utensils, and it’s worse for the environment, but it would also guarantee that you always have clean plates to eat off of and clean utensils to eat with, and you never have to worry about washing them - clean up would take as long as throwing away whatever you’re done with, and you wouldn’t have to worry about it later. If you always eat on your bed, a full-size trashcan within arms’ reach would let you have an instant clean-up, without worrying about leaving any dirty dishes food waste on the floor or bed or piled somewhere.
  
  I don’t know if any of those suggestions would work for you (and I definitely don’t want you to feel pressured to try any of them, or buy that book!), but maybe there are similar shortcuts you could find that could help you use the systems you already have in place (like tons of dirty clothes ending up on the bathroom floor) and convert them into something that doesn’t cost any more effort or time, but changes the way you feel about your home (like placing a laundry basket where the clothes will get tossed anyway).

I have been reading this book recently and it has really helped change my overall outlook on life. In the appendix section it talks about various activities that one can do, in the morning, throughout the day, and at night in order to cultivate a stoic mindset.

I usually begin each morning with a 10 - 15 minute mindfulness meditation and 15 minutes of stoic practice. The stoic practices are reciting phrases from various authors (I like Epictetus' quotes on what we can control vs what we can't), imagining ourselves as a famous thinker (I usually think of Marcus Aurelius) and how we can respond to various challenges we may face during the day. During the day, I try to bring these scenarios to mind.

At night, before bed, I take 10 minutes or so to remember my day. I go through it event by event and think about what happened and if I could have done something differently. I then make peace with the decisions and can rest easy knowing that tomorrow is a new day. I find these processes have made an immense difference in my life. They only take about 30 to 45 minutes of real time, out of my day.

The book is awesome though and goes into more details. He has other books available to that I'm working my way through, I will tell you how it goes.

I used to believe I had Aspergers until I read this book It's an excellent guide, and after I truly understood exactly what Asperger's is, what the diagnostic process entails, and such, I think it's clear that I don't have it, which was useful information to have as well.

I'm pretty sure it was Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me) <https://www.amazon.com/Mistakes-Were-Made-But-Not/dp/0151010986/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_product_top?ie=UTF8> that I read catharsis (with regards to anger) is a totally bogus concept.

Actually a pretty good book if you like to know why people (or yourself) do things the things they do.

This is a book about a large-scale scientific study that showed that about two-thirds of participants encountered alien higher intelligences and accessed other dimensions on ayahusaca:
https://www.amazon.com/Antipodes-Mind-Phenomenology-Ayahuasca-Experience/dp/0199252939

I too have had that experience, many many times. And again, I recommend that anyone interested in the truth breakthrough on DMT rather than listening to this internet troll. peace.

>I strongly believe consciousness is like a WiFi signal, our personalities are like software and our bodies are the computer. I reject with all my being that consciousness is only a program the computer runs.

I'd suggest (and there's good science supporting this) that the body IS the mind, the computer IS the software. I can highly recommend the book Descartes' Error by Antonio Damasio.

>For anyone to say they know for certain is a lier.

Science doesn't deal in certainties. It forms theories (models of reality) that can make accurate predictions given the evidence we have at the time. When new evidence comes to light, old theories can always be disproven. While it cannot provide certainties, it does provide far more accurate predictions about the universe we live in than any system of knowledge we had before science.

Please read "The Happiness Trap" - the emotional struggle you are enduring is something I have experienced and this book will help you quickly, it is very inexpensive. You can read the first 32 pages here to see if you are interested link


The other one you may really want is Becoming Attached by Price. My LPC is working with me on attachment issues and I just want to put this link in here as well book

Fellow smart kid here. Being gifted or in the upper levels of intelligence carries a LOT of downsides. Please educate yourself and be aware. Mental illness risks are a lot higher as they get older.

One of our children had suicidal thoughts in the third grade. Thankfully she talked to us about it and we got her help. It starts early. Prepare yourself and try and enjoy the ride.

Living With Intensity: Understanding the Sensitivity, Excitability, and the Emotional Development of Gifted Children, Adolescents, and Adults https://www.amazon.com/dp/0910707898/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_XBlkDbR122PWY

That book helped me understand myself as well as other gifted people. There are other books on Amazon specifically aimed at parenting gifted kids.

If you are looking for something written for a popular/lay audience, a few good starting points:

Making up the Mind by Chris Frith:
http://www.amazon.com/Making-Mind-Brain-Creates-Mental/dp/1405160225

Older but particularly relevant for emotion and consciousness- "Descartes error"
http://www.amazon.com/Descartes-Error-Emotion-Reason-Human/dp/014303622X

If you want something from a less mainstream perspective dealing with embodiment and consciousness, you may enjoy Brainstorms by Shaun Gallagher:
http://www.amazon.com/Brainstorming-Views-Interviews-Shaun-Gallagher/dp/1845400232

Hope these help!

I don't think the rationalist community frowns on intuition as long as it's getting feedback from more systemic analysis of evidence--look at Julia Galef's Straw Vulcan presentation for example (text summary here). And any realistic understanding of how rational thought works in the human brain has to acknowledge that intuition and emotion play an important role, see Descartes' Error by Damasio for some good evidence. Also, if you look into the history of how scientists have come up with important new theories that later turned out to fit the evidence well, they often talk about the important role of intuition (Einstein has many quotes about intuition and imagination on his wikiquote page). The key is just to not let intuition/emotion have the last words, to subject them to questioning and try to convert intuitions into more systemic arguments that are better for scrutinizing and testing.

I don't know the kid so I can't say what's going through his head, but as an autistic adult I can tell you what these behaviours would mean if it were me in his position:

>So we just sit in the same room, not saying anything.

That's normal. You might think it's natural to have a connection and make conversation if you're sitting in the same room with someone, but that's not how he would see it. He's not ignoring you, dismissing you or afraid to talk to you; he's just doing his own thing, and you might as well be on the moon, for all he cares. Again, this isn't meant in a negative way. He's just hanging out, paying attention to his own whatever.

>When he does talk, his speech is terrible, to the point I can barely understand him and when I ask him to repeat himself, he gets super quiet so I can barely hear him.

He probably has trouble with speech. I can't modulate my tone of voice; it's always too soft or too loud and I tend to sound hurt or angry when I'm not. I had a speech delay and was severely hyperlexic as a baby/toddler, and although I can be eloquent in text, I don't speak very well. It's like being the opposite of someone who sounds intelligent when you talk to them, but as soon as they put pen to paper you realize they're virtually illiterate. I just don't speak well. Maybe he has the same problem.

>He sneaks around the house, trying to not make a noise.

Many of us are sensitive to sensory input. Maybe he just doesn't like noise. On the other hand, maybe he's used to having to sneak around so as not to attract his mother's attention. I wouldn't blame him for that.

> He doesn't do anything on his own, with out first being told. So if I tell him to get off the computer, he does, but then he'll sit there waiting for the next command.

Ouch. Please try REALLY hard not to be too hard on him for that one. Just go ahead and give him the next command. I'm a 32-year-old married woman with a child of my own, and I'm STILL like that. It's called executive dysfunction. I'm not trying to be difficult or lazy; it's just that the next move honestly doesn't occur to me. Cleaning the kitchen is a Herculean task for me, and we're buying a Roomba next week. :-/


All in all, it sounds like the kid could benefit from some therapy. If you can't afford that, then look into ways you can help him yourself. Start with learning about executive dysfunction and handling children who've been abused. Also, consider this book. It's not perfect but it's easy to read and might be a good introduction for you.

> will never have them

I really wish I had time to write a lengthier comment, because this question is an interesting one that's the subject of a lot of active research.

Some books you might be interested in, all of which are accessible to the general reader (with a few scattered technical bits here and there):

https://mitpress.mit.edu/books/affective-computing
https://mitpress.mit.edu/books/vehicles
https://www.amazon.com/Descartes-Error-Emotion-Reason-Human/dp/014303622X

Yes. Albert Ellis, one of the first cognitive behavioral psychologists, based his cognitive therapy (specifically Rational Emotive therapy) on Stoicism. Aaron T. Beck, considered the father of Cognitive therapy said the 'philosophical origins of CBT can be traced back to the Stoic philosophers.'

There was a book written about the subject, and some articles such as here, here, and here. I don't think Stoicism is always used for CBT, but the underpinnings of it are clear and the methodology are very much intimately linked.

I'm not trying to crap on Epicureanism or anything, they probably have more in common than most would think. But I lean towards the Stoics as Epicureanism always seemed...IDK, incomplete? Or simplistic? It has clear goals, but it doesn't state many ways to achieve them, or have many exemplary or practical applications in the way the Stoics do. Though to be fair, it's very likely a lot of that is due to many of the writings, such as most of Epicurus' have been lost to history, and only a few remain, including second hand accounts. Which is unfortunate.

For all the people who have clicked on this just to say "Me too" (or "my mom/dad/SO/child/friend"):

Go read this INCREDIBLY PERCEPTIVE ENLIGHTENING HELPFUL BOOK called "Stuff"

I have a deep distrust of most selfhelp books; this isn't one. What it is is a collection of case histories and a ton of thoughtprovoking commentary. IT WILL HELP.

This is a throwaway account that I will never use again. If y'all upvote this post, people coming here in trouble with hoarders of their own will see it and quite possibly find a valuable resource.

Why don't you read Descartes and see if he convinces you? (except for it not being up to date).

Perhaps the Koch textbook my department uses has a good review (http://www.amazon.com/The-Quest-Consciousness-Neurobiological-Approach/dp/0974707708). Similarly, this paper (http://papers.klab.caltech.edu/22/1/148.pdf) has been very influential. Not that I find Koch particularly inspiring.

For more on this kind of thing I'd recommend Irrationality by Stuart Sutherland. It has some great examples of similar occurances. For example on numerous occasions a completed application form with an attached photo was placed in an envelope and left on a bench in a town centre. If the applicant was smiling in their photo a stranger who found the envelope would be more likely to post it.

I sometimes find it helpful to draw a mental line between the actual research on the one hand, and the researchers interpretations of their results on the other. One can often find many possible interpretations of a given experiment.

>What Im wondering about is if humans having little or no control over our actions is the standpoint scientists are generally taking now that a lot of new research exists to support it.

I can't comment as to whether the majority of neuroscientists would endorse this view, but I can see another interpretation that jibes well with the research I've read: we do have control over a number of factors and situations (e.g. ducking when somebody throws something at you shows control), but control amounts to a mishmash of both conscious and unconscious factors. Where others see research showing that we don't have control, I see research showing that conscious awareness has a more limited scope than was previously believed. I would not call conscious awareness an "illusion" as such, because clearly we have awareness, but I think we do have illusions about the scope of that awareness and we underestimate the importance and power of unconscious processes.

>I could add that the paper Im writing is on the emergence of Descartes dualistic theory and how it is proven or disproven in todays scientific and religious world.

You might check out Antonio Damasio's book Descartes' Error.

Anything from Oliver Sacks always worth reading imo.

• Neuroscience: Exploring the Brain!
  
  
• The Compassionate Brain: A Revolutionary Guide to Developing Your Intelligence to Its Full Potential: How Empathy Creates Intelligence!
  
  
• Descartes' Error: Emotion, Reason, and the Human Brain!
  
  
• Affective Neuroscience: The Foundations of Human and Animal Emotions!
  
  
• In Search of Memory: The Emergence of a New Science of Mind!
  
  
• The Man with a Shattered World: The History of a Brain Wound!
  
  not really neuroscience, but interesting imho:
  
  
• How the Mind Works!
  
  
  *(hopes formatting works)

I (44m) was recently diagnosed with adult ADHD and for me what goes through my mind is ..... Everything... all at once.... over and over and over again. Often the thoughts are then punctuated with a feelings of guilt for being such a fuck up under achiever. I can’t remember anything I’m not interested in and I find it impossible to finish almost any task. I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety previously and I believe both are a direct result of my ADHD. I was so relived when got a the diagnosis as it allowed me to feel a bit “less” guilty for my personality. It’s nice to know that there is some sort of reason for the way I have always been. Definitely an emotional relief to realize that I am different then most others and that there is an actual reason why am the way I am. The ADHD meds seem to help with focus, but there are a lot of tactical things I still need to address in order to live my best life. The diagnosis was just the start of my journey and I have a long way to go. I would take a look at FAST MINDS by Surman/Bilkey if you would like to understand more about how folks with ADHD operate and practice methods to change that operation.

https://www.amazon.com/Fast-Minds-Thrive-Think-Might/dp/0425274063/ref=nodl_

This is the book used in a support group I'm part of, which is dual-diagnosis for trauma/substance.

Recovery from Trauma, Addiction or Both (if you want to help yourself, the frogcabaret part)

Seeking Safety (therapists book, if you want to learn to help all your parts by also coaching them through these tough topics)

Both cover dissociation in detail, but neither go into dissociative disorders. For that, this book is best in class (IMO):

Coping with Trauma Related Dissociation

Gl,

Dee

Just want to say, good question, hoping for some insightful answers to read.

Relatedly, I found this book really helpful, and it has some suggestions at the back for daily practice.

It's a worthy read, but kind of dull. If you're looking to improve yourself, I would recommend Irrationality by Stuart Sutherland. Worthy and surprising.

I'm on my phone and so don't have access to databases and whatnot, but I'll take a stab at this. Also, KaiserToast's take on the issue is very intelligent and grounded in a wealth of scholarship (edit: KaiserToast and many of the other commenters are referring to something known as the Just-World Hypothesis), but I think there's a different possibility.

When a human looks at another human face or human being, not only is there stimulation in the visual cortex but other portions of the brain as well responsible for emotional and empathetic responses (edit: such as the fusiform gyrus, the amygdala, and other parts of the Occipital Lobe). Looking at animals, you would expect the same, but even though similar areas are activated they are different than those activated by a human form.

(This sort of makes sense, as you want humans to be able to establish rapport in a manner different than the things you eat, but this origin brushes up against bs evolutionary psychology and is entirely untestable. All we know is that humans have different empathetic responses for people and animals but that cognitive empathy and the physical correlates of that empathy are poorly understood.)

Now, as with any neuronal stimulus, the centers of your brain responsible for human empathy in certain situations of duress can be inured through excessive stimulus. Not deadened (that's not how the brain works), just made...more automatic. Your brain notices you backing the car out of the driveway every day, or juggling, or looking at gorenography and rearranges synapses in such a way so that they can be processed more easily, making them, as Christof Koch calls them, "zombie behaviors." If your brain is flooded with pictures eliciting a human empathetic response, your brain knows it can't waste the time or energy getting uppity every instance. This may not be the case with you and images of animals, though, since your brain is less inured to that stimulus (though it would be if, say, you hunted often, frequented dog fights, or set a cat on fire in order to see what happens).

People try to justify their feelings about these images by talking about natural innocence, even though there is no such thing for humans or animals (this is just an offshoot of the narrative of original sin, and anyone who says that animals don't consciously torture or go to war or rape is naive). Really, it's just your brain doing what it always does: adjusting itself based on your behavior and environment (edit: and that includes possibly developing certain biases to justify these behaviors, such as the Just-World Hypothesis).

TL;DR: It's your scumbag brain's fault.

>Combatting depression

Quoting a recent comment of mine:

>You might want to look into cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), if that isn't what you already did.

>Recommended books:
The Philosophy of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and
Unshakeable Freedom.

>Also: Recommended Post.

 
>Philosophy and Stoicism

Apart from the Enchiridion and the Meditations, the primary reading list includes letters and essays from Seneca as well as Cicero or the fragments from Musonius Rufus. Modern books include How to be a Stoic, A guide to the good life and Stoicism and the art of happiness. The FAQ has a nice list which is worth checking out.

>Books about changing the way you think (false thoughts vs. truths)

This might not be Stoic, but you might be interested in Thinking fast and slow.

>Identity

Might not be exactly what you were looking for, but reading The mind illuminated and implementing meditation as a practice, changed the way I think about myself and my thoughts on a daily basis.

>The ego

A favourite of mine is the eight page-long article by urbanmonk.

A good starting point for thought provoking and self-help books is the sub /r/BettermentBookClub. If you search for thought provoking articles, /r/Foodforthought or /r/philosophy is the way to go.

The more my government takes from me, the more tools I give them to protect me, and the safer I feel.

If you are ambitious, to understand why this is so, you can look here.

http://www.amazon.com/Mistakes-Were-Made-But-Not/dp/0151010986

A couple of my recent favourites:

Neurotribes by Silberman - interesting and easy read on the history of Autism/Aspergers

Stuff by Frost - entertaining book around the history and current theories of hoarding

I'm readying a fantastic book about this right now: https://www.amazon.com/Crazy-Like-Us-Globalization-American/dp/1416587098
Crazy Like Us: The Globalization of the American Psyche by Ethan Waters.


Here's an excellent article summary: https://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/10/magazine/10psyche-t.html

Thank you for reply. I realize that this may be beyond the area of your specialty, but I was wondering if you heard at all of Christof Koch's Quest for Consciousness (co-written with Francis Crick)? I only ask wondering if perhaps there is any other material that you could recommend that delves into this subject, namely the evolution of cognition and language. (Per your suggestion I've already ordered The First Word). Thank you.

The future of the mind by michio kaku

I read it last year and it blew my mind. Your boyfriend will love it. Check out his other books also, i think your boyfriend will really like him

This has come HIGHLY recommended to me, and it sounds like it might help you keep your sanity:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0910707898/

While this book is for parents with kids it has a lot of great info on exec skills and functioning, migh be helpful.

http://www.amazon.com/Smart-but-Scattered-Revolutionary-Executive/dp/1593854455/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1420913265&sr=1-1&keywords=smart+but+scattered

There is this one too
http://www.amazon.com/Smart-but-Scattered-Teens-Executive/dp/1609182294/ref=pd_bxgy_b_img_y

"The mind is, what the brain does"

"You" are just the sum of all the experiences and information processed by your brain. In theory, if you could do a brain transplant you could actually be in another persons body.

All the Information that makes you is encoded in your brain.

It is even hypothesized that you could, one day, extract all the information of you brain (called a connectum) and store it on something like a computer.

You could then use this connectum to re-create your brain, essentially restoring "you" from a backup. While this is all technology that's maybe centuries away, it does not contradict any of our scientific theories.

If you are interested in more information, check out this book:

http://www.amazon.com/The-Future-Mind-Scientific-Understand/dp/038553082X

As a diagnosed aspie with 43 AQ points, I agree. You seem to have the traits(you do not have to have them all) and high functioning too. If you want more reading into it, I am currently reading http://www.amazon.com/Complete-Guide-Aspergers-Syndrome/dp/1843104954, mostly for fun. It tells how I could have been diagnosed during my childhood but nobody cared.

This book (psychology) has an interesting take on how normal, healthy people might end up convinced to have seen aliens.

At the very least, it teaches you that the brain is not as reliable as most people believe, and that your memory is not as trustworthy as you think it is...

Not denying anything, just saying that alien conspiracies always seem to be based on eyewitness accounts and not actual evidence.

As someone in a similar situation to you I doubt any of the people saying you are a bad daughter know what they are talking about.

I would advise picking up the book The 36 hour day it is a fantastic guide to caring for someone with alzheimers. If you do not wish to pay for it you may be able to pick it up at the library.

https://www.amazon.com/36-Hour-Day-Alzheimer-Disease-Dementias/dp/1455521159

Also as a stop gap measure her insurance should be able to provide for a home health aid through patterns in care, personal touch or various other agencies.

Please keep us all informed so we may help you on the journey.

I've found this book very helpful.

http://www.amazon.com/Living-With-Intensity-Understanding-Excitability/dp/0910707898

It's based on Dabrowski(sp?)'s work with gifted people. Covers the whole positive integration thing-a-ma-jig.

If you're interested, there's a book called "Stuff" about hoarding that's full of good information and incredibly readable.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0547422555?pc_redir=1409968651&robot_redir=1

Made me really feel for hoarders, but also have a glimmer of hope about treatment.

Unstuck and on target

https://www.amazon.com/Unstuck-Target-Executive-Curriculum-Flexibility/dp/1598572032

Smart but scattered

https://www.amazon.com/Smart-but-Scattered-Revolutionary-Executive/dp/1593854455

Flexible and focused (written by Adele Najowski, a behavior analyst)

https://www.amazon.com/Flexible-Focused-Individuals-Specialties-Behavioral/dp/0128098333

>As of yet, we have not pinpointed exactly what morality is nor have we been able to provide definitive answers to some basic questions of morality

Sure about that?


https://www.amazon.com/Age-Empathy-Natures-Lessons-Society/dp/0307407772

Current hypotheses suggest altruism (ethics, morality) being a development originating from the maternal instinct.

Lots of non-human animals have morality. So either non-human animals have "abritrary vague social constructs" or morality is in-part biological. This isn't to suggest reductionism. There is a clear social aspect, and a clear social evolution in the development of ethics, but underneath those dynamic, evolving, constructs is biology.

A short while ago, someone on here recommended this book to me. It actually turned out to be really good!

Organizing Solutions for People with ADHD, 2nd Edition-Revised and Updated https://www.amazon.com/dp/B007ETD7GO

I disagree that empathy is inadequate. Furthermore I would argue that empathy is the driving factor for human values. Empathy was not designed by human beings and had its start long before anything resembling humans walked this earth. Given the importance of empathy to the continued existence our species we can treat it as a meta-value system and derive other values and ethics from it. This argument is made more forcefully and in more detail can I ever hope to by Frans de wall. I would recommend you to read his short article The Evolution of Empathy and if your interest is piqued enough by his arguments to peruse his longer tome The Age of Empathy.

That's actually quite a fascinating topic - there's lots of good psychological research into it.

For example, take a group of people, and divide them in half (set A and set B).

To set A, pose the following question:

"You are considering buying a lottery ticket. The tickets are $1, the payout is $20. There are 10 tickets in total, of which 9 have been bought. Would you buy the ticket"

To set B, pose the following question:

"You are considering buying a lottery ticket. The tickets are $1, the payout is $20. There are 10 tickets in total, of which 9 have been bought by Tony, the person who came before you . Would you buy the ticket"

Most people in set A will purchase a ticket. Very few from set B will.

This is just one example, of which there are staggeringly many displaying human irrationality.

Very good introductions to this area can be found in irrationality by Stuart Sutherland, predictably irrational by Dan Ariely and many others.

Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful Acts
http://www.amazon.com/Mistakes-Were-Made-But-Not/dp/0151010986

In many ways, this book is nothing too special, because it is a piece of non-fiction that describes some parts of human nature that are pretty broadly understood by educated people. However, I think it fills a nice gap, potentially giving a reader a level of understanding somewhere between what he might get reading the wikipedia pages for "cognitive dissonance" and "confirmation bias" and what he'd (hopefully) get from a lifetime of accumulating wisdom and humility. These are concepts I think most people are implicitly somewhat aware and wary of, but this thorough exploration can reinforce the reader's decision making skills in a very positive way.

Thanks nice find, I just ordered it!

I also just got Michio Kaku's new book "The Future of the mind"

Answers to these questions can be found (generally) in this excellent book which I've read and enjoyed greatly. Be careful though, introspection can be painful.

The first edition of this book was fantastic for me! (I didn't know there's a new edition.. Something to check out!)

Organizing Solutions for People with ADHD, 2nd Edition-Revised and ... http://www.amazon.com/dp/B007ETD7GO/ref=cm_sw_r_udp_awd_Ty92tb18D9BS9

I read his awesome book! I love spreading that little tidbit around. There's also another Baron Cohen who's a preeminent neurologist, whom Simon cites in his awesome book.

That's a great book, but if you want the mother-lode of individual and collective forms of irrational behaviour, I would recommend this book as well:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Irrationality-Stuart-Sutherland/dp/1905177070

OK, this might scare him; and seems to be true:

Autism and aspergers seems to be cured / treatable with stem cell therapy.

Stem cells can be naturally obtained by getting pregnant (stem cells migrate from the baby to the Mother)
If your daughter is not otherwise treated, she might get better when she gets pregnant.

This literature does not support the above, but contains a review of many other treatments

including this handy one-page summary,

and another redditor recently recommended this

Dabrowski's works are still very available on the internet. http://positivedisintegration.com/

​

You can also just type in "Dabrowski" on amazon.

​

I highly recommend the book "Living with Intensity", which contains a big picture view of gifted psychology and practical knowledge for parents, educators, employers etc.

​

https://www.amazon.com/Living-Intensity-Understanding-Sensitivity-Excitability/dp/0910707898/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=Dabrowski&qid=1563657833&s=gateway&sr=8-1

​

Some papers...

Overexcitability and the highly gifted child

http://www.davidsongifted.org/Search-Database/entry/A10102

Tips for Parents: Beyond Overexcitabilities: A Crash Course in Dabrowski’s Theory of Positive Disintegration

http://www.davidsongifted.org/Search-Database/entry/A10858

This disease beats you down so hard that practically any acknowledgment of your hard work and dedication is received with pitiful gratitude. I found this book helpful while I was caring for my dads.

I wouldn't say its just some kid with a 'wild imagination.' I think its more than that. Many alien abduction cases report a face coming through a wall, and talking to the 'victim.' Others report small children inside the bedroom, or even a glowing orb or energy that moves around within the bedroom. It sounds nutty but I read into it and I do believe there is some unexplained phenomenon going on.

Please watch Dr. Karla Turner's lectures on this phenomenon. Sadly she died in 1996 of a fast acting cancer. She was 48.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=32PIKN7eQhU

John Mack, Pulitzer Prize Winner and Harvard psychiatrist, stated that it was not the 'imagination of the victim' but a real phenomenon. Sadly he died in 2004 while walking alone by a drunk driver.

Interview with S. African children seeing UFO and alien beings

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M3fR3jTiPc8

Interview with John E. Mack (from ThinkingAllowedTV)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-U1WecFObQw

Also, the chemical DMT, which is naturally secreted in your brain, particularly your pineal gland, can give an onset of visions, transporting you to another dimension. Please look into Dr. Rick Strassman's work 'DMT: The Spirit Molecule.' Ancient cultures used to drink 'Ayahuasca,' a DMT based plant mixture that Amazonians used in order to be in an altered state of consciousness (ASC). While in this state of consciousness, people report meeting with 'alien entities,' elves, fairies, praying mantis, seeing alien worlds, as well as common visions.

For example, people totally unrelated, disconnected from each other, are seeing the same visions such as 'jaguars,' 'being in a hospital room with advanced machinery, accompanied by a tall Praying Mantis (8ft).' Other visions include black people dancing around a fire, as well as seeing a vision of a Roman era boat filled with slaves manning the oars.

Book recommendations on Psychonautics

Aldous Huxley's 'Heaven and Hell and Doors of Perception'

http://www.amazon.com/Doors-Perception-Heaven-Hell-P-S/dp/0061729078/

Benny Shannon's 'Antipodes of the Mind'

http://www.amazon.com/Antipodes-Mind-Phenomenology-Ayahuasca-Experience/dp/0199252939/

Dr. Rick Strassman's 'Inner Paths to Outer Space'

http://www.amazon.com/Inner-Paths-Outer-Space-Psychedelics/dp/159477224X/

The biggest thing to realize is that you have to realize that your body is the problem and is distorting your outlook, so you need to learn to
ignore and not trust your own judgement so much on a good manythings... in other words: Be skeptical of your own thoughts and feelings and challenge them by ignoring them and experimenting (doing things).

If you want to make your life better know that work is not really fulfilling most of the time and is just a grind, what makes your life fulfilling is the kinds of people you have around you and lack of debt...

So you want to get enough money to not be so stressed out and you want to find good people to hang around with... those should be primariy goals now to get there...

Knowing yourself and growing your vision of how to see the world is half the battle...

People are driven largely by unconscious biases and processes
they don't understand so to build up your confidence and how to see the world I would recommend learning about how people aren't
really in control of themselves (so you don't take anything personally)

First see this video (you can find the rest by googling "orwell comes to america")

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYmi0DLzBdQ

Most people operate under the assumption that when we talk logically and make rational arguments while we communicate via language other people will understand... this is NOT true and science says so, its good to know this just so you know that each persons mind is it's own universe and each persons interpretation of the world is limited to their own inner world defined by the structure of their biology.

These are good tests just to show you your own biases, and why trying to go against human biases (looks, etc) is a fools game because biases are unconscious

Bias tests:
https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/

If you really want to get a more informed view of the world and how much people have no clue about how they reason and function get and read this book (even if you don't understand all of it theres bound to be stuff you can learn about human beings just by reading it)

http://www.amazon.com/Descartes-Error-Emotion-Reason-Human/dp/014303622X/

Just sharing a bit of my own wisdom since I've been through the process of what you are going through.

Indeed. This is a great starting point: http://www.amazon.com/books/dp/1416587098.

>Science on reasoning, I mean no offence but this the best link you can provide to information on cognitive thought process?

Go pick it up and have a read when you have the time.

​

https://www.amazon.com/Descartes-Error-Emotion-Reason-Human/dp/014303622X

​

> Studies relevance to the Canadian political system?

All capitalist states work the same, you have to understand that canada is a vassal state to the US empire, you don't seem to have any understanding of history, when trump was doing negotiations for the new agreement, do you really think justin and freeland were protecting Canadians? The reality is we are all in the US political sphere of influence because we buy and use products from companies headquartered in the US.

I don't know how to get a flair but I have an B.S. in philosophy and am currently in a Ph.D program in clinical psychology.

Good thinking! The DSM (psychiatrists and clinicians diagnostic "Bible" for mental disorders) tries it's best to categorized "mental disorders". The DSM has come under a lot of flack for the way in categorizes mental disorders because the very nature of them is hard to categorize. Not all of Western Psychology agrees with it's own conceptions of mental disorders, there is a lot of internal debate amongst psychologist and psychiatrists on the nature of mental disorders and a lot are very aware of the constructed nature of them. From what I've noticed there's kind of a split between psychiatry which tends to view things medically/neurologically and psychotherapists/clinicians that put less emphasis on biology and more emphasis on environment (The DSM seems to be based on a medical model of mental disorders). Like the nature nurture debate it probably lies somewhere in the middle.

I was thinking of Foucault's History of Madness of well and Prishmael seemed to cover that. Mental disorders are probably very much bound to societies conceptions of what is good/bad and right/wrong. Depression wasn't even a thing in Japan until western culture sort of introduced it to them. There are books and books on the history of psychiatry and how it came to be (being very critical of psychiatry).

I would look up Thomas Szasz - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_Szasz
Peter Breggin - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Breggin
Rober Whitaker - http://www.amazon.com/Anatomy-Epidemic-Bullets-Psychiatric-Astonishing/dp/1491513217

I havne't read this one but this book talks about how with American culture spreading around the world, so too has our conceptions of mental illness. I've heard it's very interesting. http://www.amazon.com/Crazy-Like-Us-Globalization-American/dp/1416587098

In the additional list in the article I really enjoyed Stephen Pinker's The Language Instinct

One of my own favorites; Descartes' Error: Emotion, Reason, and the Human Brain by Antonio Damasio

There are some books on amazon about CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy). It is about your thoughts which produce an emotion regarding a situation.

Soyou have to "reframe" your thinking in a way to free yourself from those intrusive thoughts.

The good part is that it not only works for one specific mind frame or set of thoughts, you can use it to cope with jealousy issues, anxiety,insecurity, phobias, etc.

You should give it a shot ;)

https://www.amazon.com/Retrain-Your-Brain-Behavioral-Depression/dp/1623157803/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1485722758&sr=8-5&keywords=cbt

Becoming Attached for a book on the history of research in relationship attachment - as well as more current topics in relationships

How the Mind Works by Steven Pinker

Consciousness Explained by Daniel Dennet

Thinking Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman

These are the first few that come to mind. I'll add more as I think of them.

So preferential seating (sitting them in the front) may help. There are two books I would recommend looking at. I think its good to look at a book on ADHD for kids because it will put it in language they can understand and it will put it in language you can explain to them. Which is helpful. The first is The Survival Guide for Kids with ADHD

If you have kids with executive functioning problems (constantly lose stuff, can't organize stuff, forget to turn in homework, etc), I'd suggest getting Smart but Scattered

How about The Explosive Child by Ross Greene? Focuses on the Collaborative Problem Solving approach (see also www.thinkkids.org), which views temper tantrums as a delay in the development of emotion regulation skills and works on building those skills. Jed Baker's No More Meltdowns is another great option with some similar ideas.

For general parenting -- including dealing with tantrums -- I love How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk by Faber and Mazlish. Dawson and Guare's Smart But Scattered helps with executive functioning skills-development of all types (emotional regulation is an executive function; others include things like organization and planning).

Oh, and I haven't made it all the way through it yet, but The Whole Brain Child has some good ideas on how to talk about distress tolerance with kids, e.g., "surfing the emotional waves."

Copung with the same issue. I' ve found the following book extremely helpful, with tons of practical tips and exercises:

http://www.amazon.com/Coping-Trauma-Related-Dissociation-Training-Therapists/dp/039370646X/

I bought it on Kindle, which is half the price.

http://www.amazon.com/Coping-Trauma-Related-Dissociation-Training-Therapists-ebook/dp/B00O4RPUPU/

I'm sorry to tell you but you have google, one can easily lookup george lakoff or damasio

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antonio_Damasio

http://www.amazon.com/Descartes-Error-Emotion-Reason-Human/dp/014303622X

Here's a good book on the topic: http://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Attached-First-Relationships-Capacity/dp/0195115015

I just finished "Stuff", a book about hoarding. It gave me some perspective about why people hoard, and some treatment plans therapists have used effectively.

Of course, it's also possible that you overestimate the influence of society on our personalities. Maybe society's tendencies reflect genetic tendencies. This book has some interesting research: . The link isn't showing up, so it's The Essential Difference, by Simon Baron-Cohen

This book may help you

If you want to learn more, this is a really well written book on the subject.

Hey Michio. Big fan of yours. Read all of your books and am currently reading your newest The Future of the Mind. I just got it a day ago.

Of all the things you have covered, what are you looking forward to the most that you expect to happen within the next 20 years?

Much of what you describe is just describing a basic take on human health and the life history of the person you see around you and interact with.

You would enjoy Sam harris I think:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ri_hruUhJUw

http://www.samharris.org/


Not to be a downer but I'd read up on neuroscience/research papers on human behavior. You should look for roots of instincts/feelings across species because if we have some instinct there most likely will be other examples in the history of life.

Just one example:

http://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/features/rev-0000020.pdf

Also:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/014303622X/

On reason and emotion:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYmi0DLzBdQ

> Are you saying that PTSD symptoms manifest themselves differently based on your country of origin? Does culture really affect us that much? Seems weird.

Culture is, as a set of environmental factors, essentially one of the biggest determinants of how distress is expressed behaviorally and socially. The brain, its chemical language, and its physical structure does not work according to the artificial categories we've created like "anxiety," "depression," or "PTSD." There's distress, and there's the expression of that distress, and cultures have as weird and wild a bunch of ways to express distress as they have weird and wild everything else. Expression of certain symptoms or syndromal patterns of symptoms differs not only between cultures, but within cultures over periods of time.

Additionally, there are some nice accounts of how American-style expressions of distress--mapping onto our particular psychodiagnostic categories--have spread around the world piggybacked on the rest of American culture, sometimes replacing traditional patterns of psychiatric symptomatology.

Source: I teach general and abnormal psychology to undergraduates

I would describe myself and my situation very similarly to how you've described yours. Perfectionist. Messy. Random collections. I self-medicated with shopping.

Here's how my realization went...

1. Several years ago, I visited my parents in another state and my mom said she had DVR'd an episode of Oprah that I just had to watch. It was about a woman with a hoard up to the ceilings in her home. My mom said, "that's you." I was terribly offended because I certainly did not have stuff up the ceiling (I didn't). I rolled my eyes and went about my life.
   
   
2. For my birthday a couple months later, my mom got me this book. I was once again offended. I put it on a shelf and forgot about it.
   
   
3. That's about when all the shows about hoarders started. I watched Hoarders because it's interesting and I think I liked to say to myself, "See, mom? I'm not a hoarder. I'm not these people living in piles of garbage."
   
   But then...as I watched Hoarders and listened to the hoarders talk about WHY they didn't want to give up one particular item or another, I realized I understood them and I felt their pain. OMG. Do I understand them because I am one of them?!
   
   
4. I dug out that book my mom gave me and read it. I also read this book. They explain in detail a few different thought patterns that contribute to hoarding and I definitely saw myself in a couple of them. I was definitely a low-level hoarder with the potential, as you said, to slide down that slippery slope to disaster. I guess the realization itself was a slippery slope. ;-)
   
   Since that time I have been able to recognize those wrong thought patterns and get things under control before it became a real problem. I give a lot of credit to my SO for helping me channel my energies into productive pursuits.

The Future of the Mind: The Scientific Quest to Understand, Enhance, and Empower the Mind by Michio Kaku. Always been a big fan of Michio.

Sex

The Way of Men – Jack Donovan***
Sperm Wars – Robin Baker
Sex at Dawn – Christopher Ryan
Why Men Rule – Steven Goldberg
The Manipulated Man – Esther Vilar
Is There Anything Good About Men? – Roy Baumeister
Demonic Males – Dale Peterson
The Essential Difference – Simon Baron-Cohen
The Mating Mind – Geoffrey Miller
The Red Queen – Matt Ridley

****

Government

Mau-mauing the Flak Catchers – Tom Wolfe
Public Choice: An Introduction – Iain McLean
On Government Employment – Foseti (blog post)
Yes, Minister – TV Show

****

​

We have a 7 year old daughter who is very similar. We had this book recommended to us. https://www.amazon.com/Smart-but-Scattered-Revolutionary-Executive/dp/1593854455

Honestly, we haven't read it yet so I can't give you a first-hand review, but you literally used both of these words in your title, so it clearly has your son in mind...

Self-help CBT books have been shown to be as effective as thousands of dollars of visits with a therapist. As long as a person commits and does the exercises, it can really change things around.

In addition to seconding your book rec, I'd recommend also "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in 7 Weeks" by Seth Gillihan, and "Mind Over Mood" by Greenbereger and Padesky. Also "Rewire Your Anxious Brain."

The ultimate book on Aspergers. The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome https://www.amazon.com/dp/1843104954/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_InH9ub082RZ87
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1843104954/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_InH9ub082RZ87

What, specifically, do you want? Social skills? Relationships?

Happy to! It's "Retrain Your Brain: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in 7 Weeks."
Amazon UK;
Amazon US (Holy shit, so expensive for some reason?!).

I think what you're talking about is mostly the anchoring effect, though because people's first impressions are based on what sources of information they seek, and they tend to seek sources of information that will agree with them, the backfire effect plays a role here too (edit: in fact, the article on the backfire effect uses the lack of impact of corrections in newspapers on opinions as an example).

Previous post:

That is a thing. I've never heard discussion of its implications in politics. I forget the name for it, but it's related to cognitive dissonance. I read about it somewhere in this book. If I find it and discover a name for this particular phenomenon, I shall report back.

You might want to read more deeply into the notion that reason and emotion are "easily separated." See, e.g,

Robert Burton (neuroscientist), On Being Certain (see also this for a short intro to Burton's book)

Antonio Damasio (neuroscientist), Descartes’ Error: Emotion, Reason and the Human Brain and The Feeling of What Happens

Here part 1

Part 2

http://www.amazon.com/Descartes-Error-Emotion-Reason-Human/dp/014303622X

https://www.amazon.com/Descartes-Error-Emotion-Reason-Human/dp/014303622X

Þeim mun meira sem fólk veit það gerði eitthvað heimskulegt, þeim mun meira reynir það að verja það. Þetta virðist vera harðvírað í hausinn á okkur og hefur sennilega á einhverjum tímapunkti gefið okkur náttúruvalsforskot. Bók.

Hey já, það er hvorki venja í íslensku að tala um "pírata", né um "partý" í þeim skilningi sem hér er átt við. Þetta á eflaust að vera fyndið grín en hljómar bara kjánalega.

http://www.amazon.com/Antipodes-Mind-Phenomenology-Ayahuasca-Experience/dp/0199252939

and

http://abcnews.go.com/Health/story?id=4392361&page=1#.TrzoWUPiHqE

If you find it you can read Benny Shannon’s The Antipodes of the Mind: charting the phenomenology of the ayahuasca experience

It deals exclusively with what you describe your post

I am reading Michio Kaku's most recent book, The Future of the Mind

This?

>arguing with you over how "gifted" you think you are.

Dude. Read a fucking book: https://www.amazon.com/Living-Intensity-Understanding-Sensitivity-Excitability/dp/0910707898

http://books.google.com/books?id=yzEFK7Xc87YC&dq=principles+of+neural+science&hl=en&source=gbs_navlinks_s

pop sci:

http://www.amazon.com/Phantoms-Brain-Probing-Mysteries-Human/dp/0688172172

http://www.onintelligence.org/

http://www.amazon.com/Quest-Consciousness-Neurobiological-Approach/dp/0974707708

https://www.amazon.com/Retrain-Your-Brain-Behavioral-Depression/dp/1623157803/

I bought this for my sister a little ways back.

https://www.amazon.com/Retrain-Your-Brain-Behavioral-Depression/dp/1623157803/

There's a book about that.

I haven't yet read it, but I believe that The Philosophy of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy: Stoic Philosophy as Rational and Cognitive Psychotherapy by Donald Robertson is the definitive book on the subject.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Philosophy-Cognitive-Behavioural-Therapy-CBT-Psychotherapy/dp/1855757567

Hoarding is very closely linked to OCD and depression. If hoarding and hoarders interest you at all you should check out the book Stuff:Compulsive Hoarding and the Meaning of Things, its amazing and scary at the same time.