Eccentriczebpajamas, congrats!

Fellow hEDS, got married last July (pre-diagnosis), and I think I’ve got some ideas for you:

For the shoes, not sure where to look - I have really HUGE feel (size 12-13 women’s), so I struggled too, but ended up finding a cheap pair that looked great and kinda worked for me. They were tolerable but not comfortable, and I regret not focusing more time on finding a better pair.

For the registry, I’ve had really good luck with the OXO Good Grips series of stuff (their handles are chunky enough that I don’t tend to sublux my fingers, even gripping hard)

The can opener I use is a blue version of this one: (OXO Good Grips Can Opener https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00004OCJW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_5-Z.zbZ5E94HD)

They also have a kitchen starter set that might be good to work with:(OXO Good Grips 15-Piece Everyday Kitchen Tool Set https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000IELD9A/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_Ka0.zbT8JYQX5)

When I can cook, I use these gloves instead of potholders - they’re great for the heat, don’t require as much hand strength/fine motor skills as potholders would, and also do a great job at gripping/opening stuck can lids: (Silicone Oven Gloves Extra Thick Heat Resistant Oven Mitts from Aocome, for Cooking Grilling BBQ and Baking, Quilted Cotton Lining, Waterproof Non-Slip Grip Food Grade Safe 1 Pair https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01J76A9AI/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_id0.zbEAKKA40)

For sitting, this chair is my favorite. Looks goofy, but hurts WAY less than anything else I’ve tried:
(Gaiam Balance Ball Chair - Classic Yoga Ball Chair with 52cm Stability Ball, Pump & Exercise Guide for Home or Office, Purple https://www.amazon.com/dp/B006FFR37W/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_6e0.zb9Y7MDYQ)

A WiFi blood pressure monitor like the one from Nokia (I have the older Withings version) can be great for helping keep track of your overall health (along with things like FitBits, WiFi thermometers, etc., if you’re into that: (Nokia BPM+ – Compact Wireless Blood Pressure Monitor https://www.amazon.com/dp/B071F2MC29/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_Qg0.zb3J5YKKN)

Finally, if you have room, a shower stool can be super helpful if you spend too many spoons in one place and struggle to stand up in the shower (there are lots of types, including pretty wooden ones, but this type is really easy to assemble): (Medokare Shower Stool with Padded Seat - Shower Seats for Seniors with Tote Bag, Shower Bench Bath Chair, Handicap Shower Seat for Adults, Shower Stools and Benches https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06XXZQ4XS/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_mj0.zb5C9TRYX)

Oh! And bonus last-minute add: overhead lights that you can turn off from your phone, so you can go to bed and THEN turn off the lights, instead of trying to fumble your way across your room in the dark (they can also turn your room into a bright rainbow disco, if you’re into that): (Philips Hue 464479 60W Equivalent White and Color Ambiance A19 Starter Kit, 3rd Generation, Works with Amazon Alexa https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06Y3QXSGX/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_0l0.zb2N2PB53)

Good luck, and I hope you have a wonderful wedding day!


...ETA, this set of pots and pans! They have big rubbery handles that are easy to work with, and they’re easy to clean - they can go straight into the dishwasher: (The Pioneer Woman Vintage Speckle 10-Piece Non-Stick Pre-Seasoned Cookware Set (Turquiose) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B014X6NQI4/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_ov0.zb32WQSJ3)

Yeah, insurance covered everything. I called the first week of March, had a consult by phone on March 22nd, and then scheduled for July 31st a few days later. I could have scheduled as early as May, but I needed more time for hair removal. This was right when she left Brownstein&Crane, so the timeline could be different now.

Dr. Wittenberg and her Nurse Practitioner Liz are both amazing. They're big on followup, and both visited me every day while I was in the recovery facility, then there were three weekly post-op visits. Sometimes I had difficulty getting ahold of the office by phone, but emailing Liz usually got a response/call back within an hour. I also had Dr. Wittenberg's personal number, but I never had to call her. If you don't live in the Bay Area and are going to be renting, I would try to pick somewhere close to her office, because driving sucks, especially on San Francisco hills. One thing that was nice was buying a toilet seat like this

Results wise I got 5.5 inches of depth, and I started off with 5 inches, I'm happy with it. While I haven't tried masturbating yet, I can tell that my clit is very much sensate. Aesthetics are great too, something I was worried about because it seems like a gamble, even with the most reputable of surgeons.

Also, I would say my mindset was like yours going in. It wasn't crazy 'I cry every time I have an erection' level dysphoria, but I certainly didn't like the situation. That plus all the reasons you mentioned made it seem like a good idea. It totally was. I don't think I knew how much dysphoria I was feeling because it was always present. That's solved now.

> ..clam shells..

Of everything, I think these helped me the most pre-surgery. Everyone's FAI is different, but these really helped my strength. I recommend doing them with a resistance band above your knees.

> Do you recommend renting a CPM? Would you go with a hip brace looking back?

No, and no. :)

The CPM was a "nice to have," especially in the first week after my surgery when I didn't want to move/do much. However, if you have access to a stationary bike, I much preferred it. I started biking (0 resistance) after my first PT appointment, while I was still on crutches. For me, it got me out of the house (my husband had to drive), back into the gym (my happy place), and felt more productive than lying in a CPM for hours. The bike is a perfect substitute for the CPM. Note that you have to use an upright, not recumbent, bike; the recumbent places too much weight/stress on your hip.

I was so grateful not to have a brace, and I never felt that I need it. I did have to wear a knee brace for the first 24 hours, which forced me to keep my leg 100% straight. It made me want to DIE and the relief of stripping it off was immense.

I did have a set of 'anti-rotational booties.' These were neoprene wraps that went over your feet, fastened with Velcro, and then were velcroed together by a strap. I was supposed to wear them as much as possible, and absolutely while sleeping. These were... weird. I was super grateful to have them, because I did not have the strength to hold my leg straight/keep it from rotating out sideways. But after the two weeks, I was ready to chuck them right through a window. I was so sick of having my feet trapped while I was asleep and couldn't wait to be free of them.

> I used to do a lot of yoga but have scaled back to a handful of times a month (out of pure laziness). Do you do it anymore?

I don't, aside from the occasional warm up stretches before I lift. This was mostly due to laziness, but it also took a very long time for my flexibility to come back. There is a lot of scar tissue to break up, but there's a fine line between working on ROM and pushing a newly repaired joint too far. I found it VERY hard to be patient.

> Thank you again for the information! I really appreciate it!

Do you have any other questions? I'm happy to answer anything you can think of. Here's a few other things off the top of my head:

• Crutch pads. I found these very helpful, especially for my hands. I had these Crutcheze pads
  
• I also bought a toilet seat lift. Incredibly embarrassing, but basically essential. You will NOT be able to bend your hips into a 90 degree seated position after the surgery. I can't imagine going to the bathroom in that first week without something like this. Here's mine
  
• In addition to the anesthesia, I had a nerve block in my operated leg. This took FOREVER to wear off, and it took me a very long time to regain full feeling in my leg. I've heard that a lot of people worry that this is permanent nerve damage, but it absolutely does go away... eventually. I think it took 4-6 weeks to fully wear off!
  
• I had a mild allergic reaction to the adhesive in the dressings the surgeon used. My skin was red, rashy, and even blistered when I took the dressings off. This is probably unique to me, but I recommend having some gauze and medical tape on hand just in case. I couldn't even use bandaids because my skin was already so inflamed.
  
• I had pretty serious painkillers, but got off of them ASAP - about 3 days post-op in my case. They make you crazy constipated, and I did worry about addiction. I started taking tylenol instead and it totally controlled my discomfort. DO take any antibiotics, anti-inflammatories, and muscle relaxers you are prescribed, though!
  
• A few days/a week after your surgery, you will get cocky. Don't. I tried to go down the stairs a week after my surgery and almost fell... but my favorite sweatshirt was down there and no one was home to help me. Seriously, don't be me :)
  
• My surgeon also had a list of supplements that he wanted me to take post-op. My list included Vitamin C, glucoasmine, and fish oil. If you don't already have a list, ask your surgeon or his team if they have any recommendations.

Buy the hip kit from amazon (it has a grabber, sock putter onner, and other things to help dress and undress).

If you don’t have a comfort height toilet, or if he’s super tall, you’ll want to think about a raised toilet seat. (I personally didn’t need one, but I’m also 5’6”.)

You’ll also want to get a seat for the shower, I recommend the kind with no raised handles or anything, like this: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000AEGCUI?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share - this is the one that the hospital had and I loved it.
You also might want to have a stool softener on hand, they’ll provide you with one but I had to add my own into the mix just for the first couple of days.

He’ll also need a sturdy chair (like a dining room chair) to sit in that doesn’t have wheels. It helps to have a cushion here (I just used a pillow 🤷🏻‍♀️).

He’ll need some comfy sweat pants to wear. Your legs can swell quite a bit after surgery so nothing tight fitting.

Also I was super hungry after surgery (like after the first few days passed) so have lots of snack options.

The hospital will send you home with a walker/crutches (whatever they decide) and then most people transition to a cane. I got my cane for $20 on Amazon. The crutches my insurance covered.

Let me know if you have any other questions! I just had my hip done last September. :)

My 21yo son did this last June. I was there with him for the duration, and I think we checked out in 6 days. The food was excellent, and he could order food with no limitations. A nurse had to in the room before he could get up out of bed to go to the bathroom, and remain in the room until he was back in bed. They did not go into the bathroom with him, thank goodness.
He was unable to shower. He changed his button down shirt and pants daily. Next time he will bring those giant wet wipes like this: https://www.amazon.com/Surviveware-Biodegradable-Cleansing-Cleaning-Hypoallergenic/dp/B074DYPZYK to clean himself in bed. And some of that dry hair wash spray: https://www.allure.com/gallery/ten-dry-shampoos-under-20
The hardest parts for him were being tethered to the bed unless on a supervised bathroom break, and being dirty. He brought tons of entertainment, and I was there to advocate, entertain, fetch and carry, order his food, etc. I left him alone for about 1 hour a day, to give him a break from me, and to get a workout and shower in.

If you have a support person with you, be aware that the support person is not to eat the hospital food or even use the room's bathroom/shower. There was a very comfortable pull out chair that converted into a bed, and I brought my own linens and pillow. I was very comfortable.
Next up is intra-cranial EEG and potentially partial lobectomy.
Good luck to you!!! You'll do fine, and hopefully your seizures cooperate and they get all the data they need quickly!

If she can not get out of bed at all anymore, adult diapers, and chux. Not paid for by insurance afaik, can get very costly. The are disposable chux ($$$$$) and washable ones.

https://www.amazon.com/MCK13413101-Underpad-Disposable-Polymer-Absorbency/dp/B000FD2AWI

IF she can stand and pivot with help, then this:

https://www.amazon.com/Drive-Medical-Folding-Bedside-Commode/dp/B001HP7AQE/ref=sr_1_1?s=industrial&ie=UTF8&qid=1467841467&sr=1-1&keywords=bedside+commode

You should be able to get a script for this so insurance will pay for it.

I know this is prob freaking y'all out. Trust me, I know. NEVER did I ever think I would be seeing my dad naked, or my mom. Took care of both of them. It just became natural. They needed something taken care of so it was taken care of.

I like to think of it as my final gift to them, the taking care of and being there part. I would not change a thing. Just an fyi, I had my hand on my dad's heart, taking his pulse, when it just. stopped. beating. I have not thought about this in a long time. Suddenly it is raining in my eyeballs.

Anyway, it can be very stressful. Please do not worry about your job, etc. These things have away of working out. I know how much you love your Grandma and vice versa. The very most important thing, is to have NO REGRETS after she is gone. There is no do over. Take care buddy. You know how to find me. I will PM you my # if you like.

// 29 year old male • dislocated kneecap, complete ACL tear, partial MCL tear • ACL reconstruction surgery with hamstring autograft // Today marks 21 days post-op. Days 2-5 were the worst for me. Day 6 was a noticeable change and improvement; it almost felt tangible. We are all different though so you might find that your day 6 comes sooner. Because you are probably just sitting on your ass trying to occupy your brain through the boredom and pain, Ill give you a personal status update: Currently I am walking with my brace unlocked, without a limp, and doing leg raises and several strengthening exercises like a champ - I was just given the green light to unlock my brace yesterday. I can finally go up stairs reasonably well (not gathering both feet on each step), which is a huge time saver. Going down stairs is still a pain in the ass, but all of it will come with time. Also, I can now do a standing squat to about 50-60% of the 'depth' I could get to before the injury. I was just measured at 118 degrees of bend while laying on my back and sliding my foot to my butt so my flexion is getting there. The swelling is still pretty intense and there is still some bruising lingering around but I am noticing some significant improvements. I go to physical therapy twice a week and the other 5 days I do a strengthening routine at home on my own.

Recommendations: Make sure that your ace wrap is nice and loose and possibly even remove it today or tomorrow (depending on what your doc recommends). I kept my leg wrapped with the ace bandages for like 5 days post-op because of the convenience of providing a barrier between my skin and the ice machine, but the wraps can be somewhat restrictive on the circulation in your leg and not allow the swelling to escape. My leg and shin bruised and swelled up like crazy. It was bad enough to where they thought I had a blood clot and had to go in for a doppler scan; luckily I did not have a clot. The doc said it was probably due to a combination of the ace wrap, the brace and the ice machine all strapping around my leg and restricting the circulation. So I would ditch the wrap as soon as you can and just put on some sweat pants or something. Also, you are probably going to want to shower soon and I can't recommend getting something like this enough: https://www.amazon.com/Waterproof-Protector-Bandage-Watertight-Orthopedic/dp/B07FSRYT7B/ref=sr_1_4?keywords=leg%2Bcast%2Bshower%2Bbag&qid=1568924454&sr=8-4&th=1. It made keeping my leg dry so easy and I was able to shower every day without going through 20 rolls of saran wrap.

Oh and I assume you are taking some form of an opioid and havent takin a shit yet. I sampled 2 different laxatives and 1 stool softener and this one was the best: https://www.amazon.com/Ex-Lax-Strength-Stimulant-Laxative-Chocolated/dp/B000GCI8JW. It tasted good and it worked without messing with my stomach too much and made my shits the most normal out of the 3. I ate two pieces an hour or so before bed and then took my meds right before bed.

Cheers.

Hello versaKT,

In reply to your comment to me...

Your original comment was

"That flat out guarantees you're paying more than if you bought directly from Amazon."

is why I brought up (again) that I paid less on Ebay for the same product sold on Amazon, and through the same vendor too. This is why I sent the links, 'cause you kind of stated that I was a dope and probably paid more. - Nope, not so, I paid less, and those links are proof.

---------------------------------------------

Now to address another question that you directed to me regarding the 'free shipping'.

I disputed their call on violations, stating that my reviews were on full price products and that they should have the AVP banner. I have attached (or rather copied) another email from Amazon to me.

Below the email is a screenshot of the entire invoice in question, for all the products on the order. Please note that after the $17.81 deduction is strictly the 'free freight' that is automatically applied on an amount that exceeds their order minimum (and available to "everyone and their dog's groomer's cousin's septic service gets free shipping every day") - but apparently these rules don't apply to me.

-------------------------------------------------

A Message from Amazon Review Moderation Thu, Feb 16, 2017 5:06 am

review-appeals (review-appeals@amazon.com)To:you Details

Hello,
We removed the Amazon Verified Purchase badge from the reviews for your product because the reviewers received a free or deeply discounted product in exchange for their reviews.
We have noticed that a promotion $$ 17.81 applied towards shipping the product. Hence, the purchase has not been marked as a Verified Purchase.
A Customer Review marked with "Amazon Verified Purchase" means the reviewer purchased the item at Amazon and didn’t receive it at a deep discount.
To learn more about this policy, please search for “Customer Reviews” on our Help page.
Review Moderator Amazon.com
http://www.amazon.com

​

------------------------------------------------------------------

This is the screenshot of this particular invoice: Please note the $17.81 (promotion) was the applied free freight. First these were stripped of the AVP banner, than later Amazon decided that these products were all considered promotions, and therefore violations.

Order Details

Ordered on January 29, 2017 Order# 103-3394284-2933035 View or Print invoice

Shipping Address

• XXXX
  
  

  Payment Method
  

  
  📷 **** 6451
  
  

  Order Summary
  

  
  Item(s) Subtotal:$54.13
  
  Shipping & Handling:$17.81
  
  Free Shipping:-$17.81
  
  Total before tax:$54.13
  
  Estimated tax to be collected:$3.15
  
  Grand Total:$57.28
  
  Transactions
  
  

  2 SHIPMENTS
  

  
  📷Royal Pet 10012 Gnawsome Squeak and Light Ball, 4.5-Inch, Multicolor
  
  Sold by: Amazon.com Services, Inc $11.36
  
  Condition: New Buy it again
  
  ​
  
  📷Holy Stone RC Cartoon Race Car with Music and Lights Electric Radio Control Toy for Baby Toddlers Kids and Children
  
  Sold by: Holy Stone$15.55
  
  Condition: New Buy it again
  
  Write a product review
  
  Archive order
  
  ​
  
  📷Drive Medical Elevated Raised Toilet Seat with Removable Padded Arms, Standard SeatSold by: Amazon.com Services, Inc $ 27.22
  
  Condition: New Buy it again
  
  Write a product review
  
  Archive order
  
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  ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
  
  I can send many more and different examples of the same type of issue. Just ask.
  
  Or I would be willing to send you (privately) my password and you could look through my account on your own. I have nothing to hide, and I have changed my charge card accounts since then, (security reasons) and therefore there is no risk for me, as I am no longer active as an Amazon shopper.
  
  No coupons, no promotions, no codes, no discounts, no gift cards and no deals of any kind.
  
  Just full priced products ordered directly from the Amazon website product page.
  
  ​
  
  
  

*6 Mile Round Trip*

1. I just wear comfortable clothes.
   
2. I do my best to air them out but they are not too bad because of my short commute. I then put them in a bag and they go in a designated pocket in my bag.
   
3. Smell is minimal but I do use these when it is hot and/or humid Shower Pill Wipes
   
4. I grab a towel and dry it off but I work at a car dealership so those are very easy to find.
   
   If you have more questions feel free to ask!

I bought it off (Amazon)[https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00HHB5XQ6/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_Zmj-ub1MEHF15
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00HHB5XQ6/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_Zmj-ub1MEHF15]. They have so many different kinds but I wanted one with a back :) it's super light so I can move it but pretty comfy. Fits in a standard shower/tub and height is adjustable.

Ooo great idea! I’m gonna have to look at that post. Also your enthusiasm has inspired me to go ahead and get that shower seat, too! This is what I’m gonna get, cause it’s padded: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06XXZQ4XS/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_f4YzDbH8PXEQW

Also look how cool this tub thing is!! https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0753972GG/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_Q4YzDbG5EQ8J2

Sorry I don't have anything immediately to help but FYI, these things are pretty useful: https://www.amazon.com/Cleaning-Wipes-Special-Cleansing-Solution/dp/B07DQW5HCS/ref=sr_1_4?keywords=shower+pill&qid=1570135637&sr=8-4

Most of my post-op gripes are around swelling of the leg / knee in general. Get something to prop up the foot of your bed (not just your leg, do that as well). I used wood / suitcase to prop up my bed and still put my leg up on pillows.

Random equipment based recommendations for post-op.

• Long Shoe Horn (https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B001AJ3B6A/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1)
  
  
• Compression Socks / Knee Sleeves. I enjoyed Zensah, tried quite a few brands McDavid was good as well. (Socks: https://www.amazon.com/Zensah-Compression-Socks-Black-Medium/dp/B00FFZJ2N6/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1487614987&sr=8-1&keywords=zensah+compression+socks , Knee: https://www.amazon.com/Zensah-Compression-Sleeve-Heather-X-Large/dp/B01KINH4PM/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&qid=1487615023&sr=8-7&keywords=zensah+knee+sleeve)
  
  
• Handicap Bar for Bathroom. This was clutch for feeling safe in the shower.(https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B005JIM2DQ/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o00_s02?ie=UTF8&psc=1)
  
  
• Some large jug for water, stay hydrated!
  
  Other random thoughts.
  
  
• Take your meds, don't be proud, you need sleep and to stay ahead of the pain.
  
• Don't eat at a deficit post-op. I ate like I was on a bulk, this is not the time to diet because you are not exercising. Recover first, worry about weight second.
  
• Again, don't be proud, ask for help when you need it. Have some quick meals around or someone to help cook, etc. I nearly fainted in my kitchen the day after pushing myself too much.

https://www.amazon.com/Hygienease-Technologies-091021179-Bottom-Buddy/dp/B000G39ZIY

I was skeptical about buying this gadget but am now glad I bought it. My doctor put me on a medication that put alot of weight on me. I am now morbidly obese at almost 300 lbs. I went from being the best arse wipper to not even being able to reach my arse. I tried all kinds of funny maneuvers in an attempt to wipe myself and threw my back out in the process. lol 😂Thats when I finally broke down and bought this thing. My oh my, my only regret was that I didnt buy it sooner. It will even spread open the biggest arse cheeks in all of mankind! It also has a release button and comes with a private pouch. If you have a medical dissabilty or mobilty issue, or are just plain fat like me, this will work for you.

No problem.

Since he has a chest access, he probably won't be able to take showers. I recommend getting these disposable wipes and shower caps for him. I used those when I had my catheter in my chest when I first started dialysis and it helped me stay clean.

Good luck to you and your brother and stay strong. He needs a lot of support.

Hi! Just wanted to let you know that Automod removed your comment because it contains an Amazon referral link, which we don't allow in the sub.

Could you please edit the URL so that everything from (and including) "tag=" is removed?

Here's the tag-free link for an easy copy & paste: https://www.amazon.com/Daylee-Naturals-Lotion-Applicator-Handle/dp/B019EERT4C

If you've done that, please reply to this message so I can approve your comment :)

My mother is a retired nurse, and if you know anyone who worked in healthcare, they will tell you the last place they want is a nursing home. She would likely die within a few weeks, absolutely no exaggeration. So we have a nice wheelchair ramp into her home, plenty of rails in her walk-in shower, a nice seat and plenty of room to maneuver her walker. She has a push-button recliner and a handy remote control to turn on her bedroom lights and heater.

She is disabled, so I have to help her dress and cook for her and frequently pick up after her, but her mind is sharp and she takes care of her finances. It's just random things she needs help with, like her hearing and lack of dexterity makes it impossible to use automated phone menus, stuff like that. Every fall we buy cracked pecans that she opens to extract nutmeats, which helps her retain some range of movement in her hands.

I live with her now after years of rehabilitation following hospital screw-ups (some sent her to the ICU with organ failures due to hospital/facility incompetence). She has a much better quality of life and, again, both of us know she would be long dead if she were relegated to a nursing home.

toothpaste tube clips work great too, These ones are super cheap and won't have the males in your house ringing out every damn tube in your bathroom unlike the paint tube ringer, haha.

Say 'Hello' to my little friend:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000AEGCUI/ref=oh_aui_search_detailpage?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Might be too wide to fit in a tub but works great in a stall.

Fun fact it's easier to shit if you get like a little foot rest to prop your feet up.


This right here helps straighten up your track and glides right out with less strain.

If you haven't ready my post the other day, here's my commonly forgot but super handy list:

I do a couple of one or two night adventures across california a few times a year. From my experiences, here are some of the most handy things in my opinion. Note; I have an absured amount of storage on my F650GS Dakar, so some of this stuff is not for light packers:

One of those battery powered string of led lights, for easy dim lighting where you can't have a campfire. eg, something like [this](
https://www.amazon.com/GardenDecor-Decorative-Battery-Powered-Bedroom/dp/B071CFJ52T/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1518029901&sr=8-5&keywords=battery+led+string+lights)

Biodegradable body wipes, for when you reek like B.O. from days of sleeping in the dirt and you have to interact with civilized people.

Water purification tablets, in case you break down somewhere in the middle of bumfuck nowhere and you need water. The bottles are tiny so they don't take up much space.

A chair because 24/7 of either sitting upright on a bike or laying on hard dirt starts to hurt like hell.

Some good undies with a junk pouch, because you are going to be sitting for hours and everything will start to get mashed up and uncomfortable. Best investment I've made, IMO.

Luckily there's the "Bottom Buddy" by XL Living to take care of that. When you reach this point it's probably time to reevaluate your life.

False. Really, that's a nice, enjoyable kit you've made.

If she loves you, she'll learn to use something like this :P


https://www.amazon.com/ISKYBOB-Rolling-Toothpaste-Squeezer-Dispenser/dp/B0792RRFG2/

I didn’t shower for 8 days and I found this
Doact Waterproof Adult Leg Cast... https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FSRYT7B?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share

This is a life saver, it worked pretty good for me.

This is a big one
Smaller
Smaller still, but looks less stable
I have experience with the first one and they're fairly comfortable since it basically holds your butt.

Not too long ago I spent $10 on Amazon, buying two things that will inevitably save me a ton of money: one was a foundation spatula and the other was ....these things, however I wouldn't recommend these exact ones, because they're actually quite small.


But seriously, these are good investments for us skincare addicts!!

Comfort Bath Personal Cleansing, Ultra-thick Disposable Washcloths work better than baby wipes if you want to a quick clean up

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0000532VC - These are awesome for cleaning up.

Not the person you responded to but I use these after my morning workout: No Rinse Bathing Wipes, Microwaveable Hypoallergenic and Latex-Free (8 Pack) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00GTZH0PI/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_5GlXCbMYET63S.
No issues with smell (and I sweat a lot during my 90 minute workout) but make sure the clothes you change in to are clean. No rewears.

THE ULTIMATE MANLY CRY KIT:

Shower stool

Waterproof Bluetooth Speaker

Exfoliating Gloves For Making Your Skin Really Smooth

12/24 Pack of Your Favourite Beer

Good luck and have an awesome cry!

My lifesaver: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Nailtiques-Formula-Nail-Protein-15/dp/B000BB9L0S

Nail colour: https://www.barrym.com/product/Speedy in In A Heartbeat

It's called a key. Metal tube roller key to be exact. If you can't find one at Home Depot or a car supply store, you can get them at beauty supply stores.

I have a 6.5 mile commute from Carroll Gardens into midtown east. I usually leave a few suits, 6 shirts, and shoes at my office. Do dry cleaning around work.

1. Shower in the morning
   
2. Usual bike clothes (bibs and a good moisture wicking shirt)
   
3. Bathing wipes are the best!(https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00GTZH0PI/ref=pd_lpo_sbs_dp_ss_1?pf_rd_p=1944687462&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=B00008QQN2&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=W16Z22BQ4EHCACBDJWS6)
   

• Deodorant
  
  The only thing I need to pack are underwear and socks. Yes, I have forgotten them a few times and had to go commando. = /

I use this applicator. There are others made out of cloth but this one is like a foam material, a little more solid but still soft. The cloth ones absorb too much lotion and I feel like it’s a waste.

You're not joking, I found one. http://www.amazon.com/Living-XL-91021179-Bottom-Buddy/dp/B000G39ZIY

Warning, Amazon link. Clicking this link may make Amazon think you are morbidly obese and change your product recommnedations to god knows what. Might actually be kind of funny. Beware.

What helped me to not bite also has been painting my nails. I bought a strengthening polish and took a few minutes every day to paint them with it.

I used these two:

OPI Nail Envy Original, 0.5 Ounce


Nailtiques Formula 2 Protein, .5 Ounce

Here's a weird one: a butter knife.

I use it to open cans that have a pull-tab top without wrecking my fingers. Stick the tip through the loop, lever up.

See also: an electric can opener, this giant pill organizer, these grab bars that can easily be installed in the tiniest of apartment bathrooms without starting an argument with your landlord (priceless!) combined with this hockey tape (put it on your grab bars and crutch handles to keep your hands from slipping) and these anti-slip stickers, (I even put the stickers on the bathroom floor.)

Dude all you need is this. Add some wheels to it and you’re good to go for the whole night and day. Roll your ass home afterwards with your lovely iPhone 6 in your lap.

There are tons of adaptive devices to help with that. We order them for patients who have difficulty with ADL's, for whatever reason, all the time.

http://www.amazon.com/Living-XL-91021179-Bottom-Buddy/dp/B000G39ZIY

I've also seen them look very much like kitchen tongs.

i've just found this. maybe something like this would help you.
https://www.amazon.com/AquaSense-Portable-Raised-Toilet-Inches/dp/B005IV0DDA/ref=pd_day0_c__4/132-8590526-0798960?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=B005IV0DDA&pd_rd_r=f507eccd-58b6-11e9-ba44-5b53f8bf2b96&pd_rd_w=Xu470&pd_rd_wg=I6dmc&pf_rd_p=fda7cfe5-3364-4578-ae5e-ac4ab3645932&pf_rd_r=S7J697SBSXT72PE1M8Q4&psc=1&refRID=S7J697SBSXT72PE1M8Q4

Bottom Buddy

Also the people who viewed this item also viewed a vibrator with a suction cup end, and a vibrating wand fleshlight holder. Nice.

Treat yourself to a magical poo.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00U37CQ16/ref=mp_s_a_1_2_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1523312195&sr=8-2&keywords=bamboo+squatty+potty&dpPl=1&dpID=41Sn-wWTeVL&ref=plSrch

They actually make devices for this. I used to work with persons with disabilities and they make these plastic thingies (technical term) that hold the paper. I imagine someone like this might use a similar tool.

Example.

Some resort to using things like this

Just watch the game while sitting in one of these like I do.

They just need to keep some of these in the office. As a big sweaty guy myself, I keep some of these in my car to wipe down if necessary. Combined with a spare set of clothes in the trunk I can recover from being super gross without too much trouble. Just about the only thing I can't really freshen up much is my hair, but it's usually very short so it isn't much of a problem.

I got recommended [this] (https://www.amazon.co.uk/Nailtiques-Formula-Nail-Protein-15/dp/B000BB9L0S) so I bought it a few days ago to see if it'll work!

Regarding the bathroom questions: Some folks get cleaned by others. Other people use tools to extend their reach.

This dilemma awoke the sick curiousity within me. Apparently there are a lot of products to assist extremely overweight people and their toilet hygiene.

​

One product is called the "bottom buddy" which even comes with a convenient travel container. The reviews are rather sad but entertaining in a way. Here is a 1-star review left by someone: "Found this to be basically unuseable. Several attempts to use, eject, and then use again resulted in torn, dirty tissue and feces on the device itself. This may work for light cleaning, but I don't see how it can be useful for heavy duty clean ups."

​

Edit: One Star Reviews for "Bottom Buddy"

​

And if you don’t want to spend $40 on it here’s a much cheaper simple key version for $3

https://www.amazon.com/Metal-Tube-Squeezer-Roller-Key/dp/B002RTVLGY

There are adaptive tools for her issue.
https://www.amazon.com/Hygienease-Technologies-091021179-Bottom-Buddy/dp/B000G39ZIY

You may consider a bedside commode.
https://www.amazon.com/Drive-Medical-Folding-Bedside-Commode/dp/B001HP7AQE/ref=sr_1_4_s_it?s=hpc&ie=UTF8&qid=1511724249&sr=1-4&keywords=bedside+commode

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B074DYPZYK/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o01_s01?ie=UTF8&psc=1

http://www.amazon.com/Living-XL-91021179-Bottom-Buddy/dp/B000G39ZIY plenty of obeasts need 'em apparently

https://www.amazon.com/Surviveware-Biodegradable-Bathing-Shower-Cleansing/dp/B074DYPZYK

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000G39ZIY there ya go.

I wonder if she uses a big girl brush yet?

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B000G39ZIY/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1503157413&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=butt+wiper+for+fat+people&dpPl=1&dpID=21Epb1bsBBL&ref=plSrch

You need this
ISKYBOB Set of 2 Rolling Tube... https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0792RRFG2?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share

i researched on this, they do the same way as fat ppl

use a 'bottom budy'

this is a thing hair stylists user for getting all the color out of a tube.

Ooh and you can even get a fancy bamboo one

https://www.amazon.com/Fabrication-91021179-Bottom-Buddy/dp/B000G39ZIY?th=1

Toothpaste roller

Bottom Buddy wiping wand

Link: https://www.amazon.com/Squatty-Potty-Tao-Bamboo-Adjustable/dp/B00U37CQ16

one needs this: http://www.amazon.com/Living-XL-Bottom-Buddy/dp/B000G39ZIY

https://www.amazon.com/Fabrication-Enterprises-091021179-Bottom-Buddy/dp/B000G39ZIY/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1498585907&sr=8-2&keywords=bottom+wiper

Dude, step your game up. Wooden spoons are sooooooo 25 years ago.

> how does he wipe?!

Well...

I came here expecting to see this:
Link

Here's how some wipe

You're looking for this:

https://www.amazon.com/Fabrication-91021179-Bottom-Buddy/dp/B000G39ZIY

You use your paper on it.

Eww. Why wouldn’t you clean it/around it before photographing?


I mean, ideally you’d clean it every use, but if you can’t handle that then at least don’t let strangers know you’re disgusting.


Edited- decided to look up how much a new one costs... https://www.amazon.com/dp/B001HP7AQE/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_pYUCDb7GX27SE

problem solved

Dude no. Please no.

If it's seriously physically impossible, for heaven's sake there are inventions for this: https://www.amazon.com/Hygienease-Technologies-091021179-Bottom-Buddy/dp/B000G39ZIY

#2. Because nowadays there are a lot of obese people who have to use those toilet paper grabbers like in the picture. It is kind of sad.

We live in a fucked world where this sort of thing exists:

http://www.amazon.com/Kinsman-Enterprises-Inc-91021179-Bottom/dp/B000G39ZIY